Moments before...

"Say, Blake. How come you can all just accept tanks being able to do stuff without any consequences to the laws of physics?"

Masks adorned the face of the two, a plate with slits denoting their status as potential White Fang members. Blake entered the building full of cheering members and recruits, she looks to the side as Sun followed.

"And you say Neptune is the intellectual."

"I mean, you can't blame me for being curious. They shrink, phase in and out of existence, they can talk for Brothers' sake and they probably weigh tons but Ruby can lug them around like nothing."

"Sun, if I were to tell you I do not particularly care about this subject at this moment will you focus and stay silent?"

Ouch. Re-jec-ted!

"Oh... ok."

"It's about to begin."

The lights shone on the center, and a man wearing a different mask presents himself, waving his arms as a welcoming gesture before he spoke. "Thank you all for coming. To those first-timers joining us today, allow me to introduce a very special comrade of ours!"

Gasps of disbelief and betrayal. "Hey! Isn't that a human!? What's he doing here?!"

Torchwick, a master criminal and a danger to society. Notoriety includes being a thief, a womanizer, a thief, an ex-hunter, a thief, a mastermind, oh and did I mention a thief? Don't worry he'll remind you all later about his status as a thief.

His bowler hat tipped as he walked along the stage and murmurs of shock came from the uninitiated as he flamboyantly motions to the crowd. "Thank you for the very welcoming greeting! Deery, believe me, I'd be the first to admit; humans are the worst-"

Sherman sighed as he mutters from Blake's pocket. "Torchwick wouldn't be the first. If only you knew what people did back on earth."

"Well, what did your people do back on earth?" asked Sun. "I'm sure it won't be that horrible-"

"20,000 - 30,000 civilians cannibalized; Siege of Suiyang. Do you want to know where two or three of the major STIs came from? Bestiality. Dutch people ate one of their Prime Ministers. Aztecs used to dress up prisoners of war as their deities, carve their hearts out, flay their skin, and wear them-"

"-okay. Forget I asked, your earth people are insane."

"There's probably a lot more. I don't know how I know these, considering I got destroyed in early 1943, there's more I'd probably know about if I got more time around my crew. Mind you, they were all humans, they do horrible stuff."

A roaring applause and cheers arrived, the two were confused since they were embroiled in the conversation but Blake had been focusing the entire time.

"How'd he get that?" Blake was alarmed, a robot this size, stolen? Someone is definitely going to get fired in Atlas.

While the small talk was ongoing, Torchwick had already unveiled the latest of their stolen goods in front of the crowd. An Atlesian Paladin, one of the many defenses produced by the militaristic nation.

"That's… a big robot, huh." Sun nervously mentions.

Sherman rode up the inside of Blake's pocket and peeks out to see. "Huh, not bad. Although it's probably a nightmare to mass-produce. Tiger would like this kind of machine but I'd prefer simpler production."

Torchwick continued his speech. "As some of you may know, many of your brothers have been located to our operation in the southeast. You can stay here if you'd like… but if you are truly ready to fight for what you believe in then this is what I can provide. Any questions?"

"I have one, Torchwick! Do they do discounts for eyeliners at the thrift store?! I'm sure they have one for the mentally incapable!"

Torchwick ceases his steps as Blake and Sun freeze under Sherman's sudden declaration. ""What are you doing?!"" They both snapped their necks to look at the tank.

"Who. Said. That?"

Torchwick slowly pans to the recruits and recognizes the two. "Kitty-Cat? Monkey? How daring of you. I'll say, I admire your bravery but was it really a good time to reveal yourself in the middle of hundreds of enemies?"

"Uhh… I'm very sorry but I don't think you got the right people." Sun tries backing down. "We're uh… Black… and Moon… I think you mistook us for our evil- I mean goody-two-shoe twins! We're so good at committing acts of terrorism- I mean liberation!"

"We're comrades, right?" He explains to the crowd. "Eh? Eh?"

No one moved.

"That's the worst excuse I have ever heard and I've heard a lot."

Sherman screamed as Blake's hand hovers around him. "Blake! Throw me!"

"What?!" She had a moment to blurt out.

"Just do it!"

Without a second thought, her hands gripped the miniature Sherman tank and yanked it out of her pocket. She threw it at full force toward the master criminal. "There!" She screamed as loud as she could.

Sherman's eyes widened, if he had any, he should've said more than just 'throw me' when an adrenaline-pumped person had a few seconds to react.

"Blake?! Not to the front! I meant the back! I needed space to shoot and not crush the Faunus here!" He yelled as he was barreling down towards Torchwick.

"You didn't say!"

As he closed in on the criminal mastermind, he accepted his fate and made use of the moment as much as he could. "Fuck it!" He enlarged in front of the crowd.

Torchwick only had moments to yelp out as the massive 35-ton vehicle was suddenly thrust into view. "What the fuck-"

"Aaaammmmmeerricaaaaa!" If you listen closely, you would hear the glorious screech of a bald eagle while he tumbled through the air.

"Holy shit-"

*BOOM!*

People screamed, guns were pulled, and a few pants were soiled. It was on full display when Sherman got thrown and suddenly appeared. Utter damn chaos. Sherman completely bulldozed the stage and toppled the entire mech as soon as those words left his mouth.

A shatter of glass came as a visibly shaken Torchwick and heavily breathing Neo appeared unscathed at the corner.

"First that weird girl at the docks and now this?! Neo, I owe you a million cases of ice cream for that one. I swear I saw my life flash before my eyes. Get me to the Paladin!"

Despite completely wrecking a part of the wall and busting the entire building's side down. Sherman had been aimed directly at Torchwick and not the Paladin. He missed the center but got enough of the Paladin to knock it down to the ground and wreck some parts of it. He didn't know which parts but he heard some metallic pings impacting the ground.

"Damn! I would've thought it'd be enough! I guess I underestimated the durability that thing had! Blake!"

"On it!" Pulling out her Gambol Shroud, she aims for the lights as the entire building gets covered in darkness.

Her eyes had a clear sight of the room, Sherman was lying on the ground with destroyed tracks and a malformed barrel. "Sherman! Get small, we're getting out!"

He did as told and shrunk just as a ribbon whipped its way toward him and snatched him just as they were leaving the window near the top of the building.

Leaping from rooftop to rooftop, they start heading toward the streets and eventually a highway in the distance.

"Call for backup!" Sun yelled.

"How about you do it! Here!" Blake tosses the scroll mid-air as Sun almost drops it before yelling for the others. "I apologize for missing the Paladin. You could've given us a heads-up!"

"Sorry!" Sherman apologized. "I was too arrogant! I thought you'd understand! Now's not the time to remain in the past, head for somewhere isolated. I might be stupid but I won't let civilians get hurt over this stuff."

"Let's go down!"

They jump from the top, carefully cushioning their falls from each elevated highway down until they reach the bottom.

With a heavy breath, they recompose themselves as the Paladin reaches their level. The guns are aimed at their position as Torchwick smiles from within. "Kitty-Cat, we meet again. People are going to start having ideas if we keep meeting this way."

"Torchwick! Whatever you are planning, it won't work. We won't allow it!"

"Uhh... Blake? I'd rather not antagonize the person inside a mobile mech suit. So can we please tone it down a little?"

"Listen to your monkey friend, Kitty-Cat." Torchwick taunts. "I don't know what semblance that was when you suddenly threw that thing at me but I'll admit I was scared for a moment."

"Look here girlie-boy!" Sherman yells. "We know you carry a cane around for a reason, so stop acting more of a limp meat than usual! You're gonna need more than that cane to lug around that dead weight!"

"Sherman?!"

Sherman continues. "No wonder you can't even beat a bunch of kids! Half your sight is dedicated to looking at your ginger haircut and the other half is looking at your ugly ass every morning!"

"Who the hell is talking?!" Torchwick yelled back.

"Hey! Wanna know why people fight for gold? Because they don't have wealth! Want to know why I fight for peace? Because we don't have harmony! I have a suggestion, maybe you should start fighting for some bitches!"

"What?! I'd like for you to know that I get plenty of bitches!"

"Hah?! Like your mom?!"

"I don't have a mom! She left when I was a child!"

"So even your mom didn't like you?! I guess a legendary thief couldn't steal a childhood!"

"Enough! I don't know what games you are playing but I had enough!" *sniff*

The sniffle gets caught by the microphone, the group came to a halt as an awkward silence settled. The duo Faunus looked at each other in confusion before the mech suit stopped moving.

"Woah. Dude, you made the man cry." Sun unexpectedly gave pity as he heard it from the Paladin's speakers. "I think you did too much. I don't even know why you are insulting him."

"Oh, I was just trying to buy time for the rest of the team to track our location through your scroll and arrive here in time."

At that moment, a bike crashed from the sky, Weiss had been using her glyphs and arrived in the vicinity while Ruby used her rifle to travel in the air and land just next to the team. "Blake! Sun! We're here!"

The team assembled all around the Paladin, they eyed the mech as Torchwick inside recovered from the emotional distress. "*sniff* Augh... Little Red! I wasn't aware a playground was built here."

"Surrender, Torchwick!" Ruby unfurled her scythe and pointed it at the cockpit.

"Hah! Why should I? This Paladin has the latest weaponry and up-to-date software in Atlas! There isn't a single thing capable in Remnant other than this Paladin that can survive attacks with its 30mm steel armor!"

"..."

"..."

"..."

"?"

"..."

"This is the part where you all start groveling. Your weapons are going to have a hard time breaking through this!" the weapons start engaging and pointing at the group.

""Ha... Ha... Hahahahahaha!""

Three laughs could be heard among the team, each of the tanks started laughing as if they weren't in a combat situation.

They even began to wheeze even though they don't have the necessary internal organs to do a wheeze.

"Oh, man!" Tiger tries stopping but started to laugh again. "Seriously?! Who's going to tell him?"

Ruby even started to puff her cheeks when trying to stop chuckling. She couldn't fathom why Torchwick was confident in 30mm armor.

"I don't know, Tiger!" Iosif does the same. "We should really start lowering our expectations! I think we're the only things capable of saying this but... Torchwick, are you serious in saying 30mm is thick?"

To be fair, it was enough for fighting Grimm but it pales in comparison to the amount of armour Earth has since humans focused on getting better technology to kill each other rather than fighting monsters like Grimm.

"Am I missing an inside joke or am I hallucinating voices speaking when none of you brats have their mouths moving?"

"Nah, don't worry about it. Tiger!" Iosif leaped out from Yang's pocket as Tiger does the same when he was inside Ruby's.

They both enlarge out of nowhere with Iosif behind Torchwick and Tiger in front of him. "Let's see how my KwK36 88mm will do against your armour."

"Tiger, this may be the first time but I agree. I'm curious if my D-25T 122mm can blow through the entire cockpit faster than yours!"

"Bet."

"Wait!" Ruby yelled. "Don't kill Torchwick, we need him alive please."

Ok, now Torchwick was starting to get nervous. The kids were only barely fighting him off during the docks but now they're acting like he wasn't a threat at all! Still, he tried his best.

"Stop stalling!" Torchwick responded, he pressed a button on the display before rockets on the back of the mech started igniting. "You'll regret this!"

*POOT!* *POOT!*

*CLANG!* *CLANG!*

"..."

"..."

"..."

"Oh hey!" Sherman shouted "So that's what I broke! Glad my attack wasn't in vain!"

The rockets malfunctioned, poofing out a pathetic spurt of dust propellant and then flopping to the cold hard ground with obvious clangs resounding on the floor.

"Neo!" he yelled in a panic. It was a humiliating loss but he could at least try salvaging the situation.

"Blake!" Yang saw it, a glimmer within the space to the side. A shatter of glass came when a heterochromatic midget started a swing for hr friend. "Your right!"

*RIP!*

( ❛︠ ⏥ ︡❛)

Sherman enlarged from within Blake's pocket, the blade was inches from Blake's exposed neck. He blocked the blade and continued to resize, completely shredding what Blake was wearing.

"I knew I saw you back then! Don't think you forgot about me!"

(❛̀ ⏥ ́❛)

Neo flips, using her acrobatics to land upright while using her parasol to balance herself from the sudden force pushing her back.

"Blake?! Are you okay-"

"Don't look you idiot! My pants are ripped!"

*YEET!*

"Sun!" Neptune yelled from the background.

Ignoring the situation, the two heavy tanks don't let the crisis unanswered. "Iosif! Take the legs!"

"да!"

*BOOM!* *BOOM!*

Blowing through the bottom half, Iosif's shell tears through and detonates after the trigger feels resistance. His gun felt the recoil as the shot echoed through the fight.

Tiger shoots just to the side of the center, opening up the cockpit and toppling the behemoth in only one shot. "Panzer Vor! Ruby, get Torchwick! Push the advantage!"

"...oh right!"

Sherman warns. "Guys! This girl here disappears and can reappear, I don't have any idea what her true abilities are so stay vigilant!" He turns back his attention to Neo. "And you! Don't think you can stand there! Eat my .50 cal!"

*ker-chack*

( ◉ ͟ʖ ◉ )

"Wait!" Torchwick screams. "We surrender! Neo, don't." The tanks flank Torchwick as Ruby and more of the team apprehend him and put him in a kneeling position on the ground, Ruby closely threatening with her scythe, Yang tightly keeping Torchwick's hands behind his back, and Neptune close by aiming his gun at Neo.

On the other hand, Blake was aiming her weapon at the ice cream assassin while Weiss does the same, with Sun still imbedded a nearby pillar from being tossed by Blake.

(•̀ ͟ʖ ́•)

"Call for Ironwood," Tiger advised Ruby. "Just so you know, missy. My machine guns can fire up to 900 rounds per minute. Not to mention the other tanks here that have more guns. Two out of three of us have functional cannons capable of HE that can wipe out an entire squad in one hit. If you feel lucky you will try escaping but if you don't I will consider killing your boss."

"..."

"Haaa... Iosif?" Tiger sighed before signaling for Iosif. The mental understanding makes the Soviet tank nod with his barrel before positioning himself on Torchwick kneeling.

"Will do."

Torchwick peeked at the tank. "What are you- AAAAARGHHH!" his leg, maybe only a small amount but the femur was always a bone capable of being the most painful it can be. True to Nora's philosophy, Iosif was breaking his legs... slowly, ensuring pain will last for a long time.

( •︡ ⏥ •︠ )

"Surrender."

Neo pauses, the life of her only friend and trusted companion was being sucked away slowly. Her desire to kill was unparalleled but what can she do? She can try escaping or helping but what can she do alone when 3 war machines were staring her down?

Torchwick was under their custody, she could try using her semblance to take her hubby away but then... what would come next? These vehicles were far beyond human imagination, all she could do was try and escape.

It was the smartest choice, a retreat for now and retrieve Torchwick later. But something gnawed at her heart, a cold-hearted killer she was, but seeing Torchwick scream like that, she couldn't take it.

Every human has a weakness. An assassin was no different.

\(•̀ ͟ʖ ́•)/


The Atlesians arrived, it had been a complete turnaround. The fight went from a scary endeavor to a complete joke under three tanks. It had a rocky start but eventually, they apprehended an infamous thief and his side-kick.

"That. Was. Awesome! You guys just took control of that entire thing without us!" Ruby squealed in utter joy.

"Ruby..." Weiss grabs her wrist. "Why do you have your nails done? You also have a hairpin! What have you been doing?"

"Uh..."

"I was busy looking for information and yet here you are with these!" Weiss was irritated, had her leader been goofing off while she was trying to obtain information? The nerve!

"I gotta report to the general sorry!" she quickly wrestled from the ice queen's grip and ran in a flash of petals.

"We're not done here, Ruby Rose!"

The team was overjoyed, the three tanks more so when they saw their master, Ruby being happy. Though, there came an important question, especially from Tiger.

"Sherman, when you said you broke your tracks and barrel. What did you do while you were attending the rally with Blake?"

"Well..." Sherman held off but couldn't lie from the blunder. "I wanted to shoot the Paladin by making Blake throw me at the back where I won't crush Faunus. Hear me out, I didn't want them to get embroiled in the conflict."

"..."

"..."

"Couldn't you just go through the Seam and position yourself? Did you not plan it well enough beforehand?"

"..."

"You... dumbass! Damn American!"