Trapped. I felt fucking trapped.
How the buggering hells is it the first of March already? I knew months ago, the very minute that someone had signed a lease to move into the vacant apartment on my floor. Usually I am on top of that shit. I have countdowns on, prepared to avoid new people.
However, thanks to my great reputation, which I'm cursing today, I was so bloody busy with work that clocks and calendars meant nothing on a personal level. Now, here I am, in my flat, my fucking empty flat. No beer or food to be seen and I can't even leave.
It's not that I mind going out. I enjoy it really. But on my own damn terms. I go where I want, when I want, with who I want and for as long as I want. And today was one of those days, well I had planned it to be.
I was going to get a roast and a pint with Bronn, do some grocery shopping and then deal with dinner. Tomorrow was an office day and the rest of my week was also sorted. Until this bump in the fucking road came along.
I sit and wait out the sounds of the elevator dinging, of voices and movement for what feels like days. It really doesn't go on as long as I thought it would but the move did begin later in the day, perhaps this will start up again tomorrow. Bloody wonderful. At least I won't be here.
After hearing nothing but silence coming from the hallway for over an hour I attempt my escape. It's pitch black outside, save for the moon, and almost nine o'clock by the time I finally make it back to my building, bag of groceries and an obscene amount of take out in tow.
The elevator is waiting when I approach and I lean against the wall, after swiping my fob and pressing the second-floor button. I'm about to release a sigh of relief that instead turns into a gruff of frustration. Just as the doors start to shut I hear a muffled, delicate, female voice ring out.
"Wait! Can you hold the lift please!"
I'll be honest, I'm usually one of those button pushers in this instance. The button in question being the "close the fucking door button". Honestly, if I was to do nothing right now, she never would make it in time to slip through the metal doors.
But fuck me. Something about that voice, I've never been affected by the very sound of someone before, yet the simple request and barely veiled tiredness behind it have me launching forward to hold down the "open door button" as well as slinging my free arm across one side of the moving metal, keeping it in place.
I can't see anything of the woman as she scurries along the floor and over the threshold into the lift with me. She has at least three bags spread out between her two shoulders and a big box firmly in her grasp. Her face is leaning around the opposite side of the box from me so she can see where she's going and not fall flat or walk into a wall.
As soon as she's safely through the doors, she places her belongings down in the far corner, digging through one of the smaller bags and I see her whip out her own security tag and then she makes her way to the keypad as I had just done.
That's when I stop watching what she's doing and instead take her in, well the back of her.
And it's the hottest back I've ever fucking seen.
She's tall for a woman but still small compared to me. Her long, lean legs go on for miles, they're sheathed in a pair of deep blue, pants? No they can't be, it looks as if they're painted on, gods. Especially around her round, perky ass. Its a dead ringer for that stupid peach emoji Tormund would send me describing his latest conquest. None of that since Brienne stole his heart...
Then up to her supple hips that flare out in contrast to her tiny waist, even that's obvious through her oversized grey sweater. Not far up from her lower back her hair ends. Long, shiny waves of burning auburn. The only fire I've ever wanted to get close to.
What the fuck? Where did that come from?
When's she's successfully chosen her floor, she turns towards me. And holy shit, it feels as if all the air is knocked out of my body. She is the most beautiful creature I've ever seen in my bloody life.
Her pale skin almost glows, her hair and plump pink lips only make that more prominent. And her eyes. They're crystal blue and looking straight into my own. Ah fuck, I guess I was staring.
The woman isn't repulsed, offended or even seemingly affected by my scars that cover the right side of my face. She just gives me a once over and a small smile.
"Hi! I'm Sansa." She holds out a delicate hand towards me as the doors shut.
"Sandor." I huff out and return her strong handshake. It's all I can manage, when our skin touches I can feel the heat blaze through me, starting at my fingertips all the way down to my boots. Yes, including my cock.
She opens her mouth to speak again when the elevator suddenly stops. I brace my feet on the ground but Sansa is taken off guard and starts hurtling forwards. Right into me. Her hands land on my chest and my free one grabs her elbow to steady her.
I worry she'll feel my heart racing or worse, I'll have a stroke. Her body almost flush against my own, her sweet, fruity smell invading my senses, it takes all my strength to not crash my mouth to hers.
That's it, I'm losing my mind. I never think or feel these types of things.
Before either of us can react the lights go out and the lift falls silent.
"Fuck." I growl as Sansa sucks in a sharp breath.
The emergency lighting and air comes on in the next moment and then I finally have enough sense to gently release the girl.
She pulls back and picks up her belongings that fell out of her bag while I open the box on the key pad to press the alarm button. Perks of living in a modern, and let's be honest, rich building, everything is of the highest and best quality. Even in what seems like a power outage, the lift company will still receive the alarm and be able to help as soon as possible.
"You're saving me left right and center tonight. Thank you." Sansa says to me, her voice full of sincerity.
I wave her off and make a, hopefully, appreciative sound in my throat. I'm not used to or any good with praise.
"It's not just the lift that's the issue is it?" She asks, sounding tinier than she looks.
I shake my head. "No, unfortunately not. I'm thinking the electricity has gone out."
Sansa buries her face in her hands.
"Not claustrophobic are you?" I ask, hoping like hell shes not.
"No. I mean, after enough hours I'm sure anyone could be..." She trails off, looking around our enclosed space.
"I'm just tired, and sore from moving, and hungry and, and you didn't ask about any of that, sorry to unload." Sansa looks at me sheepishly.
"It's alright. It's shit getting stuck in one of these." I really didn't mind her speaking what's on her mind. This wasn't ideal and I also had this odd feeling of wishing I could help her.
Maybe there was a chemical leak, it would explain the power issue and my strange thoughts.
Sansa just gives me one of those small smiles I'm already becoming accustomed to and then slides down to sit on the floor, her back against her box of stuff.
I mimic her and sit next to the open control panel in case anything happens, as I take my cell phone out and almost curse in relief at the sight of my one bar of data.
My browser automatically takes me to our local paper's front webpage and there it is, "BREAKING NEWS: GREATER LONDON IN DARKNESS." Under the ominous headline it goes on to explain there was a small fire and subsequent grid issue. They expect everyone to have restored electricity within three hours.
Well, fuck me again.
"Do you have any service?" She asks.
I look over to Sansa and see her hands are empty. "Just data. The papers are reporting the power outage and it looks like it will be a couple of hours before we'll get out of here." She nods and sighs. "Don't you have a cell?"
"Of course, but it's dead. Hence the late night trek to my car for the last of my things. I packed it in the wrong bag." She looks over to her belongings as if it were their fault.
"Right. If you want to uh, email or Facebook or whatever, anyone you can use mine." I offer.
Forget those little smirks from before, Sansa's entire face lights up at my gesture. "Thank you Sandor. I shouldn't need to, I just spoke to my siblings before the stupid thing shut off so they're expecting me to be asleep I'm sure."
"Aye, well if you change your mind you know where to find me." I joke. Something I'm not good at but she laughs immediately and I wonder if I should start doing stand-up at the sound of it.
We sit in silence for a few minutes. If I was alone I would be cursing and stomping like the oaf I am. If it had been anyone else in here with me I can bloody say for certain I wouldn't have been half as talkative with them. I also would've been wishing and praying to gods I don't believe in that I were on my own.
Not with her though. My mind is currently spinning, actually trying to think of something to say, how I can start a conversation. And I also take a second to be bloody grateful I had just showered and then decided to wear my good jeans and jacket out.
"How long have you lived in the building? Or are you visiting?" She puts me out of my misery and breaks the silence.
"No, I live here, bought my place five years ago."
"Wow, I hope I still love the city years from now." She smiles at me. "Day one isn't going great I suppose." Sansa admits with a sigh and a shake of her head. "I'm only renting though, trying it out for a few months and then I'll go from there. My manager suggested urban life would be easiest for me." A roll of the eyes this time.
I can't focus on her reasons for moving because my slow as shit, awestruck by this woman brain just put the pieces together. Sansa is the new tenant on my floor. Holly hells. This is going to be either torture or paradise.
"You moved into the flat on second?" I practically croak.
Thank fuck she continues happily, not noticing my tone. "That's me! I guess we're floor mates." She goes on to explain before I can try and force my stupid brain to catch up. "I saw you had pressed two before the power went out."
I'm like a fucking bobble head and just nod. "Welcome." I manage with my weak attempt at a smile, I'm sure it's probably more of a grimace. That's what happens when part of your face doesn't work right.
But Sansa doesn't miss a beat, appreciating my one word and crooked grin like it was gold. I have to keep this going between us or I'll just sit here and stare at her, drooling.
"You said a manager suggested you move, what do you do?" Idiot idiot idiot. She's a model of course, what else could she be? But I know the second the thought enters my mind that I'm just being an ass. Spending fifteen minutes with this woman I can already tell she could take on the world and conquer it with grace. I'm now highly doubting I'll get the answer I was expecting.
She blushes and ducks her chin down for a moment, somehow looking more beautiful. "I'm an author."
"Shit, good for you. No easy task."
Sansa's face lights up once again, brighter than it has so far and she sits up straight, looking proud and beyond happy at my praise. Thank you. You're right it really isn't."
"What's your book called?" I bloody love reading, always have, but I don't go around telling people. I've turned to fiction books since moving here, needing the escape the stories offer.
My sour thoughts want to tell me right away that I never would've read something this girl wrote. I might like fiction but I don't sit around reading sappy romance novels. My subconscious pipes up next, telling me that's nothing like what she's written.
Sansa clears her throat, looking shy again. "Escaping the lion's den."
Holy fuck I have read her novel. In one sitting too. And it was bloody fantastic.
It was listed under fiction but there was no sci-fi or supernatural tones to it and, in all honesty, some of the writing made me feel as if it was someone's true story, not one conjured from imagination.
If my memory really does serve me correctly, it was an adult novel also and some of the erotic scenes she depicted had my hand slipping into my boxers. There weren't many of them, the book was far from a love story, but there was an air of it thrown in towards the end and those scenes came as a very welcome surprise.
She speaks again, I must've been lost in thought too long. "Have you read it? It's not brand new, it was actually released last year but it's started making it on to some of the charts recently, which is why I moved now."
Another fact I was aware of. That was why I had read it not long ago, after I saw it on the up and coming authors list. "I've heard of it, I read quite a bit, but I haven't had a chance to pick it up yet. I'm sure I will soon." I lie, I'm not ready to sit here and think, let alone talk about how talented she is and how well she writes "smut", as they call it, not when we're stuck in a box together. No, no, hells no.
I will tell her the next time I see her, maybe that will ensure there even is a next time.
More blushing and another pulse racing smile. "You have? Wow! That made my whole night! If you do end up reading it please tell me what you think. I feel as though you would be honest and seeing as I'm in the process of writing my fourth book I could really do with any constructive criticism."
"Fourth?" Crap, she's doing well.
"I say fourth but I have so many works either half started or simply just in my mind that the number is much higher." Sansa laughs. "But if you were to speak to my publisher they would say I'm working on my fourth. My second novel is coming out at the end of summer, my third one is with my editor for review and that leaves me on number four."
"Bloody hells, you're busy."
Sansa huffs out a breath, the tiredness from when I first met her returning. "You can say that again. It's not an easy dream, being a writer. Plus, I refused to be the girl that used daddy's name to get her everything she wanted."
She hasn't told me her last name and I can't remember it from the cover of her book, so her words don't make much sense. I quirk my good eyebrow at her, silently asking if she wants to elaborate.
"I'm a Stark. My father is Eddard."
"Shit, you are full of surprises aren't you?" I say to her in a half joking tone. I don't give a fuck who anyone is or the power they hold. Who you are and how you treat others are the only things that matter to me.
However, in saying that, I understand why she was practically bracing herself for my reaction. Her father is one of the most successful businessmen, I would say in the world. He was also avid in politics but one of those rare good ones. There has only ever been positive headlines about the man and he's kept his family private and hidden.
I recently read in the paper that he retired from politics after the death of his life long friend and the Prime Minister Robert Baratheon. Eddard was now back in the North focusing on his businesses and personal life.
Sansa is surprised by my blasé response but relaxes slightly. "I guess for a stranger in a lift I am." We both chuckle at that. "I didn't want anyone to sign me to their company simply because they know who my father is. If I was going to be a published author it was going to be because I wrote a damn good novel that someone thought was worth sharing with world"
Sansa's personality is as firey as her hair and I can feel myself getting fucking hooked.
This is so unlike me that I'm beginning to think I passed out from hunger and this is a starvation dream. I have a real hard time with new people. I hate the staring and the questions, two things she didn't do. And even worse, I despise having to decide when and how to tell them about what happened to my face. That's why I like my small, strong group of friends. They're all bloody amazing people that give me the space I need and deal with my asshole tendencies.
"How did you get past that hurdle?" I ask, truly intrigued.
"I used a fake name and my manager used one of hers." A sneaky smirk pulls at her lips. "I'm not a total idiot, I did get some help from my father, just to find out who the editors or CEOs of the companies were and went from there. All of the five publishers we sent my book, to begin with, wanted to take me and my story on board. We decided to meet with "Godswood and Co." and when the two of us showed up for our first meeting, the look on their faces was priceless!" Sansa is lost in the happy memory.
"We had done all of the correspondence by email and phone up to that point, and my manager also has a friend that works at the company who confirmed they were clueless about who I really was. They truly thought they would be meeting Miss J Tully when the time finally came."
If I don't like many people you can guess I admire even less. Then this woman stumbles into my life and I'm fucking awestruck. It would've been so easy to throw around daddy's name and get exactly what she wanted. But other than using a slight stepping stone she did it all by herself. And if she hadn't used a little bit of his pull that would've been more stupid than anyone could imagine.
"Gendry Black is the owner and editor and he's great to work with. We haven't had any issues in the two years we've worked together."
"Isn't that Robert Baratheon's illegitimate son?" I ask.
That information hadn't come out in the wash until the man died suddenly last summer. He never took a wife and until his will was probated, a child hadn't been mentioned. Robert's younger brother Renley was also in the party and is now Prime Minister.
Months later when this Gendry was named, the country went wild. Everyone thought he would want to take over or at least try to, even though he hadn't been in politics or even associated with it once in his life. He does seem like a good man, he only made one statement to say that he wished he had known his father but he was glad to be recognized by him as his son. He went on to say that he didn't want anything from him, besides the private letter that was given to Gendry, along with his large inheritance.
The rumor was that almost all of the money had been spread throughout charities. It seemed that he did have a relationship with his uncle now and both of them didn't need anything else. Must be nice to have family like that.
"Yes that's him. He's truly as down to earth as the headlines make him out to be. It was strange to learn of his lineage though, seeing that I grew up with his father. We lived in the north of England almost my entire life, my father supporting Robert's political run until the day he died. And now I work with his son. What a small world."
Maybe the nice editor boy is the "light at the end of the tunnel" in her book. And if he is why the fuck do I care? Why is my stomach rolling at the thought and my anger threatening to simmer over? the book might truly be total fiction.
"What do you do Sandor?" Sansa asks, breaking me out of my insane thoughts. My name falling from her mouth again making my dick pulse.
"I'm in security." Why can't words come to me as easily as they do for her?
I swear she looks over my arms and chest before replying. "Are you security personnel or is it for buildings and homes?"
"I used to be a body guard a while back and when I got tired of everyone staring at my ugly mug I opened my own company." I try and fail to keep the irritation out of my voice. No matter how long ago it was, I still feel the stares.
"You're definitely not ugly." Sansa says with a quick lick of her lips before her eyes widen, seeming shocked she said that.
I had to have heard her wrong. I'm frozen for a second, my heart racing at her admission. "We uh, suggest the best alarm systems, cameras and lighting for homes and businesses. We have a sister company as well that does the installations. I also have a team who can be hired for short or long term contracts as security for individuals or groups." I explain, trying to ignore her comment.
"That's amazing and a huge accomplishment. I have to say, I'd trust you to keep me safe."
My jeans are uncomfortable at this point. I'd keep her safe. In my bed. Get a grip you old dog!
I cough, trying to regain my composure. "Yeah, business is doing well. Been very busy lately." Gods, I'm such a loser.
Before, what I can only expect to be an awkward silence falls over us, both of our stomachs groan. I have no time to feel embarrassed because Sansa's soft laughter fills the elevator immediately.
"Oops, sorry. I lost track of time and missed dinner."
"Don't be. I have loads of Chinese here, we shouldn't let it go cold. Got a chilled bottle of wine too. It's a screw top but no glasses, I was going to use my own." I roll my eyes.
"I couldn't take away from your dinner." She politely protests.
"You're not, I'm offering."
Sansa doesn't fight me anymore. Instead she walks over and sits next to me, the food and wine between us. "I really can't thank you enough Sandor, for everything. I'm famished after unloading my car. It almost makes me regret telling my family not come down for the move."
"Why did you ask them not to?" I inquire after eating a whole dumpling.
"I needed to do this on my own. I'm definitely the biggest homebody of all my siblings and after some...things I have worked through and gotten over I felt as if this was a time for me to shine, on my own, for me." She shakes her head and picks up an egg roll. "Sounds silly I guess."
"No, it doesn't. It's a big deal when you make the strides you have, for your career and personally."
She looks straight into my eyes and just smiles before munching on her meal. I decide then is the perfect time to open the wine and take a long gulp before passing it to Sansa who also takes a decent sip, not caring that I drank from it first.
We eat in a companionable silence and after downing about a quarter of the bottle to myself, and on an empty stomach, the food not doing it's job yet, I get an unusual burst of liquid courage.
"You didn't even want your boyfriend to come help? That's a lot of things for anyone to tackle alone." I nod towards to her box and bags.
Sansa coughs and takes another swig of wine. "I don't have a boyfriend, I've been single for a while." She emphasizes the while. "Why were you so sure one existed?"
Ah fuck. Well, she said I wasn't ugly so here's go nothing. "Besides the fact I talk to hardly anyfuckingone and I've been here with you for over an hour now enjoying myself. Just fucking look at you." I wave a hand towards her perfect frame.
Sansa blushes and laughs. "How sweet." She teases sarcastically.
"What about you?" She asks. I tilt my head not following. "When I bring dinner and wine to yours to thank you for tonight, is some lovely lady going to chase me out the building?"
I don't know what shocks me more. That she thinks I could possibly have a woman or that she is coming over for dinner. I'll get to see her again. Why am I so damn excited?
I bark out a harsh laugh. "No fucking way. And you don't have to pay me back, I wasn't going to let you go hungry as I sat here with food."
"I know I don't have to but I want to. Unless you wouldn't want the company." Sansa rushes out the last part, losing her confidence.
"Of course I do." I practically interrupt her.
We finish our meal and the wine over talk of the apartment building.
I tell her about all the tenants. Ms. Tyrell is in one flat on the first floor and her niece Margaery stays there when she's not traveling for work. She's a fashion designer and can be gone for months at a time. Like she presently. The other flat on that floor is occupied by Davos, a nice old man with a wicked sense of humor. He's one of few people who have showed me utter kindness. Both of them have actually, I enjoy visiting them or helping out where I can.
The third floor is empty and under intense construction by the fourth floor, a.k.a. the penthouse owners, Ellaria and Oberyn Martell. I think they're redoing the floor below for her three sisters. Ellaria, Ob and their children aren't here full time hardly part time really. He travels frequently for work and they love to spend their fortune on several vacations a year.
All in all it's a quiet place to live and I've been content here during my five years.
Sansa seems relived to know the goings on of her new home and thanks me once again. After that she talks about her family. There's a fucking lot of them. So many I actually made her clarify their names and connection to her.
Sansa is snorting with laughter at my shocked face, her home is large and busy, so much so I can't even wrap my mind around it.
"Okay, okay I'll list everyone out, maybe that'll help. My mom and dad have Rob, me, Arya, Brandon and Rick. We also grew-up with my cousin Jon as his mum passed away in childbirth and his dad died in combat. My uncle Ben adopted our family friend's daughter Shireen, who's Arya's age, after her mom and dad died in a car crash. Since he's a single man he needed some help and she spent loads of time at ours. See, not *that many people!"
"They'd need name tags if I was part of your family." Sansa falls into a fit of giggles at that.
"I'll suggest it at our next family gathering." Her face still bright from our joking, Sansa asks me the simplest seeming question. I know there's no malice or ill will behind it but I can't control the way it makes my blood boil.
"What about your family?"
I'm seeing red, the horrific memories and pain still eat away at me. Even after all this time. My reaction is irrational and over the top but I can't stop it. No matter how much I want to.
"That's none of your business. Not everyone is as godsdamn talkative as you." I growl.
Sansa flinches and regret colors her face. "I'm sorry I asked. I meant nothing by it." There's some venom in her tone by the time she's done speaking. Good, I'm glad she's not putting up with my shit. She didn't deserve my attitude.
"Fuck. You have nothing to be sorry for." I say as I attempt to slow my harsh breathing. "I have no family, it's a shit topic for me, you wouldn't have known."
Sansa listens intently, and her face softens at my depressing truths "I'm still sorry, for the fact you have no family. No one should feel as you do when that subject comes up. You deserve better." She tells me, full of ferocity of a different sort now.
"Why on earth would you bloody say that?" She doesn't even know me! Yet I can say I believe the same for her. Sansa deserves the utmost from life. Hypocrite.
"I've dealt with some awful people and experiences. The silver lining, besides escaping them, is that I can tell the good from the bad, pretty damn well now." There's a hint of sadness in her voice and it makes me wonder again if her book is based somewhat on her life.
If it is, then I'll be asking Bronn to "take care" of the lead character "James" and his mother "Ciara" as they made life a living hell for the lead heroine, "Savannah".
"Well, thanks. I'm an ugly, old grouch but I try my best to be good"
"Again, you're not ugly." She reiterates, looking at me from head to toe. "You also don't seem old and yeah okay, you can be a grump sometimes, but I think it feeds into your charm." Her cheeky smile directly affects my cock.
Before I can respond and try to compliment her, even though I don't know where to start, the lights in the lift come back on a second before it starts moving again.
"Has it really been that long?" Sansa asks herself mostly, while looking at her watch with wide eyes.
I do the same and see it's just past midnight. Shit that flew by, and I could've done with longer, longer with her.
We clean up from our meal and before she can even react I collect all her things from the corner of the lift.
"Sandor you don't-" Sansa tries to protest but I cut her off.
"I know, I want to." I use her same words from earlier.
She looks at me, her features glowing from her smile and sneaks my two bags out of my grasp.
"Hello! Are you alright in there?" A voice booms from the box inside the keypad.
"Aye, we're fine. Both going to the second floor." I respond.
"That's great news. I am in the lobby and will need to speak to at least one of you for my report. I'm sorry to bother you but can I pop up and meet you outside the lift?"
"Yes fine. I'll meet you there in a few minutes." I confirm.
"Thank you, see you soon." The man says as the doors open and we exit.
"Let's get you home." I tell Sansa and lead the way to her flat.
She overtakes me when I approach her door and unlocks, opens and holds it for me.
"You can leave them next to the sofa please."
I place her belongings down, scanning her mostly empty living room before facing her.
"Sandor I cant thank you enough, for tonight. I think I would've gone crazy stuck in there without you."
"No need, glad I could help. It was surprisingly nice to not be on my own." I make my way to the door and I hear her follow me.
"Before you go, here." She holds out her cell phone, the page open to a new contact with my name already entered. "Put your number in and I'll WhatsApp you about dinner." I make to reassure her it's not necessary and she can tell, stopping me before I even begin. "I insist and I want to." She says determinedly.
I take her iPhone, our fingers grazing and the tingling sensation is instant and has my stomach flopping. After quickly adding my number I hand it back and avoid her skin.
"Awesome! I'll message you so you have my number also."
"Alright then. Good night Sansa, it was nice meeting you." I sound like such a fool, I want to slap my hand to my forehead.
"It was really good meeting you too." She moves so quick I don't realize her intention until it's too late to worry or overthink my reaction.
Her small arms reach around my middle and give me a tight hug. My arm, sans bags, lightly holds her around the shoulders and my face is dangerously close to her bare shoulder. An obvious fact I'd been trying my damnedest to avoid all night. The smooth, uncovered skin was practically calling out to me and now it's right in front of my face. I can't stop the hopefully silent inhale I take of her.
I could die happy just from this embrace. I'm not good or accustomed to much human contact but my reflex to reciprocate her hug was instant.
It's over too soon and Sansa is looking shy again when she meets my eyes with a sweet smirk that I try to return before I leave and head back to the lift.
I deal with the elevator technician and make my way back to my flat in a daze. What the fuck happened tonight? I've never connected with another person, let alone been that bloody attracted to anyone my entire life.
When my phone dings from next to me in bed, I can hardly believe what I read. No matter what she told me, I thought she was simply being polite.
Sansa : Hey Sandor it's Sansa. I just wanted to give you my number and say good night. Again. Lol
I know in that moment, I can feel it in my gut, that my life will truly never be the same.