Kagome did not know a thing about carrying a hanyō baby, but one fact she learned quite quickly: it took a tremendous amount of energy.
Often tired and lethargic, she'd crawl out of bed every morning and shuffle to the kitchen, bleary-eyed and sluggish. Her muscles and bones ached from the new and unpredictable demands of growing a hanyō pup. Forcing her eyes to stay open for more than a few moments was a constant battle. She'd take short naps throughout the day and go to bed early, grateful that she had finally found a job that allowed her the flexible hours she needed.
Kagome remembered the all-encompassing fatigue that had descended on her during her first pregnancy. Rising out of bed each morning had become a Herculean task, made worse by the sharp pulses that coursed through her limbs anytime she moved, the kind of shooting pain that had nothing to do with the baby growing in her belly. During those times, she had constant bruises dotting her arms and legs. Her skin was always marked with dark purple smudges she had to cover with long sleeve shirts and turtlenecks.
Her whole body tensed as the unwelcome memories crept to the forefront of her mind, triggering a wave of intense emotions. A chill ran down her spine, and her heart raced as she tried to send the images back to the dark corner of her brain where they belonged.
But Kagome had to admit: her experience with pregnancy this time around was vastly different from the last time. Her husband and mate was protective, gentle, and loving. Sesshōmaru remained by her side at most times, as though he was guarding her against unknown threats. These days, he seemed to crave constant touches and physical connection as much as she did. The mating heat had yet to wane, but she knew he was holding back, knowing she was in the earliest stages of the pregnancy, and thus most delicate. But, as much as she tried to convince him that she was safe and that it was perfectly acceptable that he went to his office and go about his day, he insisted on staying by her side.
She enjoyed his company, and thus she did not protest too much. They settled into a comfortable routine after their mating ritual. They breakfasted together before he set off to his study while she took care of her own work at hers. During lunchtime, they would meet up for a quick bite or enjoy an early tea break. They would sneak in brief conversations inside the greenhouse, or steal moments of hungry kisses and gentle touches when they thought no one was looking.
It seemed that Sesshōmaru always knew what her body needed even before she could ask for it herself — be it rest, sustenance, comfort, or healing — he was there with whatever she required. It was no wonder why their bond had grown so strong over a short period.
Though, she had to admit, sometimes he was careful to the point of overly cautious.
"Kagome," Sesshōmaru said one evening, his tone deep and quiet as he saw her still tapping away at her laptop. "Shouldn't you be in bed already by now? You must rest."
"Sesshōmaru," she said, looking up at him, a little smile playing about her lips. She made a project of looking at the clock on her desk. "It is seven-thirty in the evening."
"I see that, my mate, but you are in a delicate condition," he reminded her, his hand smoothing over her belly.
Kagome smiled again. Perhaps her husband and mate had forgotten she was an entrepreneur now, with an online store to run and a gigantic order from one of the most reputable inns in the country to sort out.
"Sesshōmaru," she said patiently. "I am also a woman running a business. I have orders to fulfill, contracts to review, and a new client with a large order I need to oversee. Besides, I've just had dinner. I can't lie down now; I'd get heartburn."
"Heartburn?" His voice took on an alarmed tone. "It sounds horrid, not to mention dangerous. Let me call the Prince and ask him to drop by the house to examine you."
From the look of it, Sesshōmaru did not know what indigestion was, let alone heartburn. How nice it must be, Kagome thought with amusement, to not be plagued by heartburn, acid reflux, or digestive issues. She placed a gentle hand on Sesshōmaru's arm before he moved away. The thought of her mate calling the Prince for every little discomfort was frightening. The other day, she practically had to snatch the phone from his hand because he was dialling the Medical Director's number because she had a hiccup. A hiccup.
"The Prince, or any doctor for that matter, will advise me against lying down immediately after I stuff my face with a heavy meal," she told him. "Trust me. I'm just sitting here, peacefully working, while I give my body some time to digest my food."
His eyes narrowed. "You do not stuff your face," he mildly admonished her, his tone lacking heat. "You eat the perfectly reasonable amount for someone pregnant. Especially with a hanyō baby. I would be ecstatic if only you'd eat a little more."
"Sesshōmaru," Kagome intoned patiently, trying to keep herself from chuckling. "If I ate another mouthful, I'd certainly burst."
Her mate and husband was always concerned with the amount of food she ate. He often asked the cook to make only dishes she loved to encourage her to eat more. But, since she got pregnant, he was obsessed with heaping just one more serving onto her plate, urging her to put more into her body, citing the excuse that she needed as much energy as she could get during her pregnancy.
"I do not cherish the thought of you, or the pup, starving," he said, frowning.
"We are hardly that," Kagome reassured him. "We are so far away from starvation."
Sesshōmaru looked skeptical, but he knew when to change the subject. His eyebrows furrowed as he thought, and then he sighed and moved closer to her. He tilted his face towards her hand, and she felt a warm tickle as he drew her palm against his cheek.
"Are you cold?" he asked. "Your hand is cold. I could turn up the temperature."
She smiled. "No, I'm fine, thank you."
"Are you hot, then?" He frowned again. "I've read that the body temperature of a pregnant woman may increase during the first trimester, in which case, I can turn the air conditioner on—"
Their windows were frosted with snow. The harshest period of winter was well underway, and the thermostat read ten degrees Celcius below zero. Despite that, Kagome watched in disbelief as her mate reached for the air conditioner switch. She bit her lip to suppress a giggle.
"Sesshōmaru," she said in a mock warning tone. "The temperature is perfect." He nodded, but she caught the dejected look in his eyes, the disappointment from wanting to spoil her and yet discovering that she had everything she needed. Except one.
"I could use a hug, however," she told him, mirth dancing in her gaze. His eyes lit up immediately. His soft growl as he wrapped his arms around her and transported them both onto a nearby armchair drew a burst of carefree laughter from her.
"My mother telephoned earlier," Sesshōmaru said as they settled inside the plush chair, lips close to her forehead as he combed her hair with his claws. "She wants to see us for a belated New Year celebration. A small family dinner at her home, just with her and the Prince."
She wrapped her arms around him and snuggled closer into his chest, nearly chuckling. The dinner might be 'small' in terms of the number of attendance, but she very much doubted it would be anything less than lavish.
Still, she found herself looking forward to it.
"Mmmmm, that'd be nice," she hummed against the fabric of his shirt. "We really should have paid our regards earlier. How remiss of us."
"They will understand." Her mate paused to kiss her temple. His hand rubbed a soothing, circular pattern on the softest part of her belly. "All things considered."
"Would your mother be pleased that she is about to be a grandparent?" Kagome asked.
"She'd be ecstatic. I can assure you that she'd hide her true feelings, but she'd be the first to look at cribs and nursery decors."
Kagome smiled, relieved. Grandmothers always had the best advice, her own especially, and she was sure that Sesshōmaru's mother would be no different. Then, she thought about the special preparations they should make for their visit, such as bringing a gift for Sesshōmaru's mother, which seemed like the right thing to do as part of the New Year celebration.
"Maybe we should bring something unique to her as a New Year's gift?" Kagome spoke up. "I was thinking something handmade, like some of my soaps or lotions, or—"
A deep chuckle interrupted her train of thought, and Sesshōmaru pulled back to look into her eyes with amusement. "You need not worry about what to bring my mother. She already cares about you so much that your presence will please her. Besides—" He paused to caress her belly again. "We have the greatest gift she'd ever want right here."
Kagome breathed in deeply, all tension loosening as she let Sesshōmaru's body heat wash through her, enveloping her with the comfort she found only with him. She was not at all surprised when she realized she really was looking forward to the dinner. Lady Kōcho, and the Prince, had accepted her into their family so readily, despite their differences.
She knew the visit would be a wonderful evening they would treasure for years to come.
On the day of the visit, Kagome had expected to see Sesshōmaru's mother at the door, but it was the Prince who greeted them with a warm smile. Kagome returned his pleasant look, smiling shyly when she noted the subtle hint of surprise in his expression when he took his time to study her.
From his expression, he knew straightaway that she and Sesshōmaru were mated, and were now expecting their first child. Though the Prince had always been kind and lovely, this time, the level of affection and admiration in his gaze felt different. Kagome could sense he was happy for them, truly happy.
And when he clamped his hand on Sesshōmaru's shoulder, patting the younger daiyōkai's back like a proud father would, Kagome's suspicion was confirmed.
"Let us go inside," the Prince said, ushering them past the foyer, as though impatient to have Lady Kōcho share in the wonderful news.
The female daiyōkai had been expecting them, and as soon as they entered the sitting room, she began to rise from her seat. Her bright, astute golden eyes observed them, quickly sensing that something was truly different. The ripple of emotions that coursed through her face promptly diminished, but it was not missed by anyone present in the room. She drew a sharp breath, lips blossoming with a regal yet joyous smile.
"A double blessing," she said. Her tone, though level, was warm. "How auspicious it is for the new year. Felicitations to both of you."
Then, she took a few steps to stand before her son. Although visibly affected by emotions, Lady Kōcho kept her expression composed and serene.
"My son," she murmured, looking up at Sesshōmaru, fingertips brushing lightly against his cheek before she slid her hands down along his arms and grabbed onto him. "My son is about to become a father."
Sesshōmaru bent his head to kiss his mother on the cheek, a rare roguish grin blooming on his lips. "You look rather teary-eyed, Mother. Are you alright?"
"Do not be cheeky," Lady Kōcho retorted, playfully slapping his arm. "I am only too happy for you." Then, she shifted her eyes to Kagome. "You too, Daughter," she said, reaching out to squeeze Kagome's hand. There was a silent, poignant moment in which the daiyōkai looked as though she really was misty-eyed.
Then, she quickly looked away, casually dabbing her eyes with her fingers as she led them all to the dining room. "Had I known, I would have arranged for something more suitable for a celebration," she began to fret.
"Lady Mother," Kagome stopped her. "Anything you prepare is always so wonderful. Please, do not worry."
Lady Kōcho spoke as if she had not made any arrangements for tonight. Having been familiar with the household for a while, Kagome knew her mother-in-law must have asked the cook to prepare a selection of ten different dishes for their dinner. The exquisite flower arrangements of jasmine, lilies, and peonies had been freshly cut from the florist earlier that afternoon, and adorned the dinner table and sideboards with their delicate fragrance.
They sat at the table, and platters of food were brought out straightaway, one beautiful dish after the other, until the surface was overflowing with myriads of delicious delicacies suitable for a grand celebration. There was a selection of various grilled meats and fish, colourful vegetables in spiced sauces, plump and flavourful dumplings, and much more.
Kagome inhaled the mouthwatering aroma, pleased to know there was nothing in the scents that brought on bouts of nausea. She knew that, as a pregnant woman, she was becoming more sensitive to various smells, and that some might have adverse effects. Considering she was carrying a hanyō pup, she believed her nose might become even more sensitive than others.
"Are you feeling well, Lady Kagome?" the Prince asked as soon as they began to eat.
"Reasonably so, Prince," Kagome replied, smiling at him. "I am often tired, but otherwise well."
Prince Shinsui nodded. "Yōkai babies undergo rapid developments inside their mother's womb during the first eight weeks, after which the growth stabilized and slowed," the Prince explained. "You will continue to feel depleted for the next few weeks, and then you will feel immensely better. Your doctor will prescribe prenatal vitamins that should help with fatigue."
Kagome was about to thank the Prince when Sesshōmaru cut in. "I would like you to look after Kagome," he said with a tone that brooked no argument. "Especially while she is pregnant."
The Prince kept his voice calm and level when he looked at Kagome and smiled. "Your mate already has a doctor," he pointed out. "One I strived very hard to get for her."
Sesshōmaru glowered. "I will not have some no-name doctor to be her primary care physician, not while she is in a delicate state."
Kagome wanted to sigh. That 'delicate state' again.
"He is not a no-name doctor," she told her mate, squeezing his hand over the table and taking on a reasonable tone. "His name is Doctor Masaru, and he is a competent physician."
"He is still not Prince Shinsui, the Medical Director of our most renowned yōkai hospital," he retorted.
"Sesshōmaru, I do not need the Medical Director to oversee the pregnancy. Doctor Masaru is perfectly capable, or —" She looked at the Prince. "— perhaps the Prince has a recommendation for a good and reputable obstetrician?"
"Doctor Masaru minored in human-yōkai obstetrics, so he is the perfect physician to look after your wellbeing," the Prince explained.
Kagome was happy with the Prince's answer, but Sesshōmaru refused to be swayed.
"Did you not look after Lord Kageyuki's mate while she was pregnant?" he asked.
Lady Kōcho cleared her throat. "As much as I'd like Kagome to receive the best care, you cannot compare her situation to Kageyuki's mate."
"The physiology of an inuyōkai is very similar to that of a human," Prince Shinsui said. "The mating between the two of you is relatively smooth compared to some other yōkai breeds out there, and thus I am confident you will not require my interference, unlike Lord Kageyuki and his mate."
"And Lord Kageyuki is not physiologically compatible to mate with humans?" Kagome asked, unable to hold her curiosity back.
"He is a rare breed, that one," Sesshōmaru explained. "Even rarer than the inu and the dragons. A type of spider that is now extinct, aside from him."
"Thus, there was much we did not know about his reproductive system," the Prince continued. "Things he did not know himself, including how his breed of spiders consumes their mothers as nourishment during the fetal development stage, especially in the third trimester."
Kagome's food fell from her chopsticks, her mouth gaping. "Their baby was eating his mate from the inside?"
"It made quite a stir when it happened," Lady Kochō said mildly. "Considering it happened during a dinner party for the Queen's birthday celebration. She collapsed in the middle of the fish course. It was quite bloody, and most of us could not even begin to fathom what was happening or how to help."
Prince Shinsui nodded. "Doctor Mizuno had the mind to extricate the fetus from her womb immediately, after which we took her to the hospital for emergency surgery — thirty-six hours of challenging full bowel reconstruction. The mother is fine and healthy now. She and her mate dote on their son, though it is safe to assume he will be their only child."
Kagome remembered the Prince had briefly mentioned Doctor Mizuno before, the first female yōkai physician to begin practicing modern medicine in Japan. A brilliant doctor and surgeon, especially in the field of antenatal — or fetal surgery.
"That's a relief." Kagome gulped. Thankfully, the brief nausea she felt upon hearing the story had abated, leaving her appetite unchanged, more or less.
"You will meet her, in addition to Doctor Mizuno, as she is one of the volunteers at the Women's Centre," Prince Shinsui added. "You may even meet Lord Kageyuki, as he is a lawyer and has agreed to donate his time whenever any of the women need legal aid."
Kagome was suddenly reminded of the Prince's offer for her to be involved with the Centre for abused women and children, and Doctor Mizuno was the physician who spearheaded the project. She caught Sesshōmaru's eyes as he looked at her, concern brimming in his gaze, knowing she had her own business to run, and it had just begun to take off.
"Will you have time to help at the Centre?" he asked. "Without pushing yourself to exhaustion?"
"It may not be on a full-time basis," Kagome replied before she looked back at the Prince. "But I'd still like to help whenever I can."
It felt important for her to be involved. Whenever she recalled her past experiences, she shuddered, knowing there were women and children out there suffering from similar treatments and, in most circumstances, not having any place to seek help.
Prince Shinsui nodded. "To be frank, we can use any help we can get. I plan to invite you to the newly-built Centre and make a formal introduction to Doctor Mizuno. She can take you on a tour through the facility, and you can advise her of your availability."
Sesshōmaru must look concerned still because the Prince smiled reassuringly. "Do not feel pressured. Your health is most important. Think about what you can give. Anything helps, and this can wait until your condition stabilizes and you feel you have more energy."
Prince Shinsui's understanding touched Kagome's heart, and Sesshōmaru's as well, so it seemed, because her mate lowered his head in apology.
"Forgive me, Prince," Sesshōmaru murmured. "It was rude of me to make demands instead of having faith in your choice of primary care for Kagome. I should have known that you have her best interest at heart and will not surrender the supervision of her health and wellbeing to someone you do not trust yourself."
The Prince laughed easily. "You are not the first concerned father who has made demands," he said, his tone light and pleasant as he patted Sesshōmaru's forearm with understanding and evident fondness. "I have been threatened many times, and bribed even more, by concerned fathers-to-be. Considering Lady Kagome's history, I understand why you'd desire the ultimate care for her, and we will ensure she gets everything she needs. Do not trouble yourselves. No offence was taken."
Sesshōmaru inclined his head again, cheeks a little pink, and Kagome wagered it had nothing to do with the heat from the nearby fireplace. Kagome smiled. Though Sesshōmaru displayed not much beyond his impassive façade, she knew he must have worried that he had inadvertently offended the Prince, the male he had considered a mentor and a father figure.
She looked around the table, warmed by the closeness and the camaraderie she could feel between each of them. This was her family, she told herself. This would be their child's family, and the thought warmed her further.
Tenderly, she rubbed her midsection, which was still flat. Nevertheless, she knew their child slept within, continuing to grow with every second that passed.
Sesshōmaru whisked her home not long after tea and dessert were served. As much as Kagome appreciated the outing, a chance to dress up and have a night out, she was glad to be in their own home — a place she had quickly adopted as her haven, her sanctuary.
Since the pregnancy, Kagome had taken on a new habit of walking after dinner. The winter weather was often too cold for a stroll outside; thus, she had been using the greenhouse for post-dinner exercise. Tonight, as he often did on many nights, Sesshōmaru kept her company. Arm in arm, they strolled round and round the worn wooden worktable, amid pots of rosemary and thyme, ducking beneath creeping vines that she hung from the rafters; their heart-shaped leaves grazing the top of their heads. The spicy, herby scents of the plants soothed her, and the crushed mint and lemon tarragon leaves she held in her hand prevented any potential nausea and heartburn.
The bluish light of the midwinter moon streamed through the windows, illuminating their path inside the greenhouse. The magnolia tree was a bright pink cloud in the distance, ever-blooming, stark against the indigo sky of night. She smiled inside whenever she caught sight of it. The vision still caused pangs of grief inside her chest, but now it was bittersweet, tempered with the warmth suffusing her chest whenever she thought of Sesshōmaru and the love they shared.
"I think—" Kagome began, breaking their comfortable, companionable silence. "I think it's finally time to see Inuyasha and Kikyō, and their children."
Sesshōmaru looked surprised though he did not refuse, and only asked: "What made you decide?"
Kagome drew a deep breath and let it out in a slow exhalation. "Family," she replied. Then, staring at him, she nodded. "It is important that our child is surrounded by as many family members as possible. Earlier tonight, as I looked around the dinner table, I realized its importance. Your mother and the Prince love you, and they will love this child. I hope Inuyasha and Kikyō, and your nephews, will feel the same way."
With his eyes, Sesshōmaru conveyed to her his thoughts even without uttering a single word. There was no guarantee that Inuyasha — whom she had not seen in over five hundred years, and Kikyō — who insisted on her own children wearing yōki suppression beads — would welcome a hanyō addition to their family. Even if Inuyasha was a hanyō himself, Sesshōmaru's and Shippō's warnings, telling her that her old friend had changed, resounded in her head.
He had changed.
That ominous warning sent a shiver down her spine, but she owed their child — and perhaps Inuyasha, and herself — to attempt reconciliation.
If Sesshōmaru disapproved, he did not say it. If he thought the meeting would not go well, he did not say it either. Kagome was thankful that Sesshōmaru voiced none of those doubts, and instead gave her a chance to try. He cupped her cheek, running his thumb back and forth gently against her skin, a slight smile on his face.
"I will contact Inuyasha and make arrangements," he said. "We will meet them as soon as we find a mutual date and time."
In agreement, they abandoned the topic and continued to stroll again. Sesshōmaru tucked her arm underneath his, keeping her hand warm.
"Did tonight make you miss your mother, and the rest of your family, more than usual?" he asked, placing a hand atop hers and rubbing her knuckles with the rough pad of his thumb.
"I miss them," Kagome admitted. "But not in a painful way, not like before, when I felt so alone I couldn't help but wish I still had them as my pillars of support. Now, with you by my side, I only wish they were here to share this joy with me." She looked at him, seeing his eyes shining brightly in the darkness. "The joy is overwhelming sometimes. It overflows inside my chest. My regret is that I wish I can show them how happy I am."
She added as they rounded the corner of the table again, "I wished my mother was with me too, the first time I was pregnant," she confided. His hand tightened around hers in support at the mention of her first pregnancy. "And then, I was relieved, and even glad, that she wasn't. She wouldn't have liked the way I became. How weak I was under that man's thumb."
"She wouldn't have liked it," Sesshōmaru agreed. "And she would've been enraged, but not with you. Never with you, Kagome."
He stopped near some calendula bushes. Rays of moonlight streamed into the greenhouse, lighting up his silver hair and making it glow.
"I wish you could have your family around you," he said, tracing the curve of her cheek with a knuckle. "I know how much they mean to you. I am sorry, Kagome."
Though it still existed and would always be, the ache was dim. Much dimmer than before. She was even able to smile. "Don't be," she told him. "I have yours."
"Ours," he reminded her as he interlaced his fingers with hers.
Kagome smiled and leaned over to press a kiss against his lips. "Ours."