The dead can see into the future. Kakuzu, for the most part, died and then came back to life. Fractured as his memories may have been, he was sure of one thing: He couldn't stay in Takigakure. He had a world to save
Huge thank you to bigdogneversleeps, the user that gave me the bare bones idea that I converted into this big piece!
Also, I am reposting this today because I believe the bug that didn't properly allow people to see new works has been fixed.
Y'all ready for some more of my insanity? 'Cause now we got a Kakuzu saves everyone fic!
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For all intents and purposes, he had died. The dead hadn't shown him anything, he theorized, because he had been dead he had merely seen what every other dead person saw. But he had no way of confirming what truly had happened to him during the transformation the Earth Grudge had imposed on his body. So, for now, he would just say that he was tortured by the dead; rather than think too hard about the implications of memories that were not his own and had not yet come to happen having been implanted into his mind.
He had written the names down when his mind had still been fractured by the hundreds of deaths he had suffered through. There were quite a few names and not all of them were alive in this day and age. Some wouldn't be born for decades, he was sure, because of how young they had looked in the visions the dead had punished and blessed him with.
Hashirama Senju, Tobirama Senju, Madara Uchiha, Hiruzen Sarutobi, and Danzou Shimura were all alive today. These would be the first he would focus on. He didn't know what he had to change about them, but he would do everything in his power to make them better people.
Orochimaru, Jiraiya, and Tsunade. These three had been noticeably older in the future he had seen; but he wasn't sure if they had already been born or were still on their way.
Minato Namikaze had also been dead in the future he had seen- but resurrected. Kakuzu had no true way of knowing when this guy had been born and when he had died; unlike Hashirama, Tobirama, and Hiruzen. Kushina Uzumaki had died incredibly young.
Fugaku Uchiha, Nagato, Konan, and Yahiko were pretty old, but not quite as old as either Danzou or Hiruzen had been in the future. It would be some time before they were born.
Kakashi Hatake, Obito Uchiha, and Rin Nohara were particularly young- he had quite some time before any of them were born. There was still time for him to change their fates.
Itachi Uchiha, Sasuke Uchiha, Naruto Uzumaki, Sakura Haruno, Kiba Inuzuka, Hinata Hyuuga, Shino Aburame, Rock Lee, Neji Hyuuga, Tenten, Chouji Akimichi, Shikamaru Nara, and Ino Yamanaka. These were the youngest shinobi affected by the chaotic future the dead had shown him. They had been mere teenagers; younger than even Kakashi, Obito, and Rin. They were the largest group with a rather hefty amount of influence in the future he had been shown.
Being the youngest, though, they were also the ones he would have to worry about the least.
Kakuzu frowned at himself as he finished re-reading the names he had managed to learn from the dead before he had been reborn into this hellish existence. His body was still recovering from the transformation imposed by the forbidden jutsu, even if he had undergone it more than a year ago. The threads within his whole being continued to unmake and remake themselves, causing endless pain in differing points of his body.
He had no idea what he was doing. Hell, he barely even know if what he was doing right now was smart or viable. But... well... it wasn't as if he could return to Takigakure. The elder bastards that had been ripped apart at his hands had deserved it, of course, but he knew the Village wouldn't agree with him. He had been lucky that Hashirama Senju had decided to take pity on him a second time and allow him to enter Konohagakure as an ally, albeit a dangerous one that could not be fully trusted, instead of having killed him on the spot for having dared return to the scene of his failed assassination.
His eyes narrowed as he heard his front door chiming, alarming him to someone forcing their way into his temporary lodging. Immediately he knew who it was, of course, because everyone else had the decency of at least knocking- and not more than a handful of people were actually willing to talk to him, much less visit.
Kakuzu stepped out of the room a second after he knew Tobirama Senju had trespassed on his apartment- he could continue wracking his brain for the creation of a proper plan to change the future after he had dealt with Hashirama's pesky younger brother.
"You tried to kill my brother."
Kakuzu quirked an eyebrow as Tobirama's voice drifted in from the other room. And he swiveled around on his heel, turning to face the white haired Senju all the while he stepped out the room that held all of the theories he had compiled from his time within the realm of the dead. He was quick to slam the door behind him, causing the automatic locking mechanism to kick in.
"Is that the way you will greet me for the rest of our days?" he questioned, actively doing his best to deflect all attention from the room he had left so hastily. "It has already been two years, Tobirama. Your brother and his wife forgave me."
The Senju had walked into his apartment as if he owned the place. Well, technically, he did. But it still irked Kakuzu that the man believed himself within right to invade his makeshift home without even knocking to announce his arrival.
Alas, this was the price he had to pay for having tried to assassinate his older brother... even though he had apologized. Sure, it may have been halfhearted, mumbled, and only done under the effects of alcohol... but the apology still stood.
Right now the man was standing before his front door with his arms crossed over his chest. His analytical red eyes were scanning over the bare walls of his apartment; taking in every single nonexistent detail to create a profile of his mental state. If this had been anyone other than Tobirama Senju, Kakuzu would have already kicked them out of his apartment; probably, he would have even gone about detaching a limb or two as payment for the trouble they would have had to go through- seeing how this was essentially a break in. But he couldn't do that. Not to Tobirama Senju.
"My brother has a soft heart and an even softer brain." Tobirama finally broke the silence that had settled over them like an uncomfortable and unnecessary blanket on a hot summer night. "You should have been executed. Or, at the very least, incarcerated."
Realistically, it was only right for him to face punishment for the crime he had tried to commit against Konohagakure's First Hokage. But the First Hokage was an idiot with too big a heart and too illogical a mind. When Kakuzu had gone back to him and explained his special... situation... well, Hashirama had actually decided to believe him.
It was truly a very lucky thing that he had died while Hashirama was still the leader of the Village. If it had been Tobirama in charge, his plan would have failed before he had even begun to truly polish it.
"Your brother is the Hokage of your village."
"Even through the abundance of flaws, Hashirama still has many virtues." the red eyed male shrugged, voice very clearly filled with disappointment that was undoubtedly directed at his older brother's way of being. "His word may be final; and you may have been saved of your proper fate because of his unfortunate flaw of forgiveness; but that does not mean that you have been exonerated of your actions."
It wasn't very surprising to find that Tobirama Senju distrusted of him. It was predictable, really. And, in a way, it was even comforting. After the great betrayal he had suffered through because of those that were supposed to have stood by him, it was reassuring to see that there was still loyalty in the world. It was a shame it wasn't directed at him, but he understood the reason as to why this particular Senju was so wary of him.
"What are you doing here?" he asked, diverting the conversation away from the topic they always started with.
Tobirama Senju would never allow him to forget how he had attempted and failed to assassinate his older brother. Kakuzu knew that this was because he wanted to hold the crime over his head. But he had a sneaking suspicion that the other male also kept repeating this as a reminder of how big of a failure Kakuzu was.
Not even his Village had wanted him after the failed assassination, after all. Konohagakure had only accepted him because of Hashirama's compassionate heart. He would be absolutely no one if not for Hashirama.
Tobirama was an asshole.
"The Hokage wishes to speak with you about expanding commerce. He believes you have a good eye for merchandise, vendors, and just about anything that pertains to money."
He did.
"When and where?"
Tobirama sighed out that Hashirama wished to hold a sort of lunch with him and some of the other individuals that would be involved in contemplating how to expand Konoha's economic possibilities outside of selling their shinobi's skills. Kakuzu immediately felt exhausted at the very prospect- any kind of meal where Hashirama tried to speak of political issues always involved Madara... and those never reached any end because Madara was impossible to convince to go through with any choice that wasn't thought up of by his own clan or those clans that were allied to the Uchiha before the peace treaty that ended decades of warfare.
"At least you'll be suffering with me." he took some solace in knowing that Tobirama would be tortured just like he.
Tobirama frowned, "Your head has no place staying on your neck. Do not push your luck."
Please, he couldn't push what he did not possess.
"Then maybe I will establish my own Village- separate and independent of this disordered farce heading nowhere other than pure disaster!"
The shout was purely fueled by anger at Tobirama and held no true intent behind it. Madara was renown for losing his cool whenever Tobirama Senju pushed him too far- and Tobirama was renown for acting like an insufferable little shit whenever Madara Uchiha stood in the way of him getting what he wanted. Madara was a volatile individual and Tobirama felt no qualms in becoming the spark to set him off.
Kakuzu stopped himself from sighing out as Madara slammed his hands against the dining room table; it was a good thing that the plates had been cleared a few minutes before the heavy discussion topics had been reached. If not, he was very sure a few of them would have already been sent flying by the rather immature Uchiha.
This was a clan leader... Madara Uchiha was a man of important standing and an actually powerful position... and he was constantly allowing the brat named Tobirama get the best of him.
If not for the fact that Kakuzu was stuck having to pay attention to everything that was being said because he also doubled as a record keeper for any meeting he was forced to attend, he would be within his own mind, continuing to contemplate the best way to defuse the situation between these idiots.
"Please, Madara, Tobirama did not mean what he said."
"Oh, but I did, brother. If Madara is so bothered with the way we are choosing to run Konohagakure, he can just pack up his clan and establish his own Village far away from us. Not only will that lead to me never having to see him in meetings pertaining to our Village, it also means the Uchiha will be far away. This would be an absolute victory."
Madara growled out something unintelligible and Hashirama groaned in dismay.
Kakuzu remained seated, arms crossed over his chest and his eyes closed. He may have to listen to these idiots, but that did not mean he needed to see them.
Hashirama began to scold Tobirama for his rudeness; Tobirama began to scold Hashirama for allowing Madara to walk all over him; Madara continued fuming, ranting to himself as the Senju brothers ignored him.
As the inconsequential stupidity continued around him, Kakuzu couldn't help but acknowledge to himself that Tobirama had a point. If Madara truly thought Hashirama was a horrible choice for Village Leader and continued to push for more Uchiha power, then, quite possibly, the best choice for him was to establish his own Village were Uchiha reigned supreme and decided on all of the-
His shoulders stiffened as the sudden thought struck him.
None of the men around him noticed his physical show of shock. Good.
Flexing his fingers by straightening them and balling them up into fists, Kakuzu admitted to himself that while he wasn't Madara's biggest fan, he was aware that he needed to change him if he wanted to change the future for the better. And very possibly, the best way to go about changing him was... well... giving him what he wanted.
Tobirama may have said this just to make a point of how little he liked having the Uchiha around, but the belligerent little shit actually had a point. And... well... this was the most concrete plan Kakuzu had been able to think up of as a way to change Madara as a person... other than trying to kill him, of course- which he knew would be futile as long as they were all allied under Konoha.
"Kakuzu, are you sleeping?"
Madara's snarl was absolutely unnecessary because they were all grown shinobi that could tell when someone's breathing became deep enough to signal anything deeper than just having their eyes closed. Kakuzu, though, didn't point such a reality out and merely cracked one eye open. He found all three idiots looking at him with varying emotions on their faces- Tobirama took too much pleasure from antagonizing the people he did not like in life; the frown was too smug to ignore.
"That would be impossible with all of the shouting." he grunted before closing his eye once more. "I am merely tired of having to see such idiotic faces while subpar brains continue creating futile and simple-minded arguments for a topic that does not merit my attention."
"Kuzu!" Hashirama groaned, and Kakuzu breathed out heavily.
Instead of addressing any of the fighting or issues, he instead informed, "A full hour has passed since we began this meeting. You have another hour and then I am leaving. How you choose to invest this time will only affect you."
Madara's rage was palpable and Kakuzu couldn't help but sigh in exasperation at this fact. This hotheaded Uchiha was the person he was contemplating to be the leader of a brand new shinobi village... The future was less doomed than before; but he wasn't sure if the change he would be causing by helping Madara Uchiha achieve more power would be that much more positive for the future generations of ninja of the world.
It... had taken a lot less convincing on his part to get Madara Uchiha to truly contemplate the possibility of establishing a Village all his own, far away from the still budding Konohagakure.
Honestly, seeing how eager the Uchiha had been, it was no surprise to find that he had been one of the main reasons why the future had become so violent, destructive, and skewed. Madara Uchiha was a force of nature and if he wasn't killed, he would no doubt become something volatile in the future.
Considering how his body was still suffering from the effects of having died one hundred deaths only to be stitched back together by the Shinigami, Kakuzu was not yet, unfortunately, in any shape to rid the world of the threat that was the leader of the Uchiha clan.
The Land of Mountains was far enough away from Konoha for them to not have to worry about any immediate threats, just like it was far from other budding Hidden Villages. But it was also near enough to establish trade routes and supply lines with Konohagakure- something that was imperative to do to ensure a steady source of supplies and for Konohagakure to understand that they were still allies.
Hashirama was not happy that he was losing both his best friend and charity case. Tobirama was somewhat happy to see that Madara and the rest of the negatively-minded (selfish) Uchiha were leaving; even though he did admit to feeling somewhat bothered to see Kakuzu leaving with them. Kakuzu believed he had made to sound as if he was bothered by the fact that he wouldn't be able to keep a close eye on him anymore; sentimentality was not really one of the most important attributes of this Senju's mind, after all. But maybe the younger of the Senju Brothers would miss being able to annoy him, even if he didn't know how to properly voice out complicated emotions.
Within a few months of planning, hosting diplomatic talks between the Uchiha Clan and Konohagakure's government officials, establishing economic viabilities and other such annoyances, Kakuzu and Madara Uchiha set off to the Land of Mountains to scout out a proper place to establish a shinobi village.
(Officially, Kakuzu was going with Madara because he wanted to set up a new village where he was far away from the Senju. Unofficially and in the Senju's heart, he was going to make sure Madara didn't get himself killed due to his own foolhardiness or his inability to understand when to back down. It was a large favor Hashirama was granting him and Kakuzu loathed the fact that he just continued indebting himself further to the Hokage of Konoha but what else could he do when he was trying to change fate?)
On the trip to the Land of Mountains, Madara had almost died. Kakuzu had been forced to save him from a poison trap laid out by one of the hunters in the nearby village- all the while, he had reminded himself to not make fun of the Uchiha for having sprung a trap even a child would have been able to see; and all because he had been too busy fuming about Hashirama's incompetence and Konoha's foolishness for having chosen him as their leader.
Madara had not thanked him for not having let him die.
Kakuzu had not been surprised.
When they had finally reached the Land of Mountains, they had utilized the aid of a native mountain dweller to find a land that wasn't already inhabited, no matter how dangerous it was to reach. This particular mountain dweller was an eccentric man with too little worry of possible dangers, so he had jumped on the opportunity to lead two big shot shinobi to one of the most dangerous caverns in the whole land- it was isolated, far from the main traveling sites, and accessed via a steep incline that could only be traversed with shaky ladders or expert chakra control.
Seeing how this cavern was so difficult to reach, no one had bothered with making a set of ladders long enough to reach its bottom. This would be the first time Kakuzu had witnessed what was, essentially, a civilian utilizing chakra at the bottom of his feet to walk on walls.
When they eventually reached the lowest point of the cavern, with their supplies halfway drained and their spirits beginning to wane, Madara was struck with sudden inspiration. There, at the bottom of this specific point of the cavern, there was a large opening towards a large body of water- probably a river.
The initial plan had been to, possibly, utilize this difficult entry-way as the number one way to reach the bottom of this particular mountain. At the bottom, they would build the foundations of their shinobi village.
Madara, looking upon this large, open space that seemed just about endless that eventually opened up to a body of water... decided that they would build their shinobi village within the mountain; carving through the walls and leaving this open area for public spaces, rather than homes.
Kakuzu wanted to throttle him right then and there.
"With earth style users, we'll be able to carve our homes into the cavern. We'll begin establishing the Uchiha homestead within that wall!" he went off on a tangent by himself and Kakuzu closed his eyes to center himself.
A village within a cave system... dug into the mountain that housed such caves... only an Uchiha would come up with this...
Their guide whistled a low tune, feeding into Madara's insanity by pointing out that this particular opening at the ground floor was probably going to be fertile due to the body of water nearby. Agriculture wouldn't be too hard to start up with the right experts, he had said, then began to offer some experts he knew about from his own little village.
He couldn't believe what the Uchiha was planning on doing... and all because he couldn't stomach the fact that Konohagakure had voted on Hashirama to lead them...
"Trading will be a nightmare." he eventually cut into the Uchiha's delusions of grandeur. "Acquiring any sort of wealth and communication networks with the rest of the world will be unnecessarily difficult. Our shinobi leaving the village to be able to complete contracts-"
"All of that can be solved easily enough with the proper diplomacy."
Madara Uchiha didn't know what the word meant. Kakuzu accepted the fact that helping this lunatic establish a shinobi village in this horribly isolated- although naturally protected- location was the second best thing he could do to change the future. Killing the Uchiha was still not a viable option, even if he knew it would be the easiest way to make a positive change.
"Everything is perfect." the Uchiha eventually stated, voice absolutely filled with confidence and damning hubris. Kakuzu frowned, fingers etching deeper into the arms he had crossed over his chest. "All that will truly be missing would be a name."
There was a beat of silence in which no one spoke up.
Kakuzu then remembered how he had saved Madara from dying a slow painful death.
"Ryogakure."
The Uchiha's glare was scathing and immediate and utterly predictable- Kakuzu merely opened up one lazy eye, blinked once, and closed his eye once more.
"After everything you have made me go through and everything else I will have to suffer because of this village, the least you can do is allow me to name it under the only thing that truly matters in this world."
"It's a name for a greedy nation! We Uchiha are not greedy- we are proud!"
Their guide cleared his throat at this point, foolish enough to interrupt a conversation between shinobi. "I like it! Straight to the point about what you're looking for, simple to pronounce and write, and perfect for shinobi-like subterfuge!"
Kakuzu breathed in and sighed heavily- why did this man think he really had any need to say anything about shinobi affairs?
"What do you mean 'shinobi-like subterfuge'?" Madara, the fool, actually chose to listen to him.
There was a sound similar to a whine, then the man explained, "It'll make it seem like all your village stands for is money, therefore the best caliber of mercenaries, which means contracts for assassinations and shinobi things will probably be directed more towards you than other villages that preach more... uh... peaceful ideologies." Kakuzu opened his eyes in time to see the man smile, there was a gold tooth in his mouth. "You'll seem perfectly heartless!"
He couldn't believe it... how had this man managed to figure out his true reasoning behind such a name within only a few heartbeats?
Madara's silence was a contemplative one and, well, at least it meant that he was actually thinking about what the civilian had just said.
"Seeming like all we truly care of is money will make it seem like we'd be willing to do anything for only the highest price- therefore we would have no true allegiance except for the party most willing to dish out large sums..." the Uchiha repeated what the man had said, albeit in his own words. "That will give us a leg-up on business if we ensure the quality of our shinobi to be the best."
"And considering how you're Uchiha and all, very few will question the quality."
When Kakuzu turned to look at Madara, he found the oddest expression on his face... he was smiling, but it wasn't a tight expression of impending doom for whoever had pissed him off... it was a soft smile, with barely any malice in his eyes... it was daunting to see on Madara.
Buttering up an Uchiha wasn't very difficult to do, it seemed.
Within a year, the Uchiha that were not content with staying in Konohagakure had gone through with the arduous trip of reaching the location of what would become Ryogakure. The first homes to be carved out were small, yet furnished elegantly because there was nothing the Uchiha did that could ever be considered humble. Kakuzu's own nook was small, far away from the Uchiha, and kept as sparsely decorated as he liked.
Hiramori Umino was the name of the mountain dweller that quickly became Madara Uchiha's favored consultant for any affair that dealt with the people of the Land of Mountains. He was able to convince the new Village Leader to allow some of his people to enter Ryogakure territory under contracts for construction and agricultural work- and the Uchiha accepted because he had enjoyed hearing the man's praises for the Uchiha.
No longer did Kakuzu believe this unhinged mountain expert was a fool- he was one of the wittiest men he had ever met in his life.
The trade between Ryogakure and Konohagakure was at first complicated because of the difficulty of running supplies down a cave system that took a half a day to reach the bottom of what was the official main land of Ryogakure. Konoha merchants weren't apt to take the trip and the Uchiha were still learning how to traverse the landscape without slipping and injuring themselves. So Kakuzu was forced to bear the most burden in that respect because, as Madara had stated, he was built like an ox. Most of his days were filled, at first, with going up the mountainside through the outside because he hated how stifling it was to travel through the inner channels and ladders; and then the return trip had to be taken through the claustrophobic places because accidentally losing grip of them inside was less dangerous than having them slip from a steep mountain.
It was at this point that Kakuzu learned how to utilize the damned threads within his body to, essentially, tie objects to a large part of his body. If he avoided the masks on his back, he had quite a bit of open space to do such a thing, so carrying the supplies wasn't as horrible as in the beginning- although he never allowed anyone to see his body's... modification.
At one point Hiramori had pointed out how he was able to now carry supplies for a good dozen more people than before; Kakuzu had promptly ignored him.
Eventually, once carved houses were completed and agricultural grounds were established, Madara ordered the construction of bridges that would allow Konoha-born merchants to access the ground-level of Ryogakure without having to pass through the inner channels. That took a good quite some to properly plan; even longer to complete- and Kakuzu was still forced to be the driving force behind acquiring supplies and getting them out of Ryogakure. Luckily, though, other of the Mountain-born workers eventually warmed up to the treacherous trips and began to aid him- for the right price. Unfortunately, he wasn't able to make his trips easier by utilizing his damned body.
By the time Hiramori's people were given permission by Madara to build a sector for new houses for themselves, Kakuzu was asked by Hashirama to return to Konohagakure for some talks. Madara had been enraged by the fact that he hadn't been invited, but Kakuzu and Hiramori had worked together to convince him that he was much too important to be visiting a place as undeserving as Konoha when there still so many things to do in Ryo.
Hiramori was officially named Minister of Foreign Affairs a day after this moment and Kakuzu couldn't believe that a civilian had wormed his way into Madara's inner circle so quickly... and then he had remembered the Uchiha pride and some of that surprise had waned.
In Konoha, Kakuzu was forced through the torture of attending various diplomatic meetings with other delegates that were neither from Konoha or any village he actively cared about. Hashirama was able to get some free time for them both and congratulated him on the success of Ryogakure- reluctantly, Kakuzu admitted that these talks were fruitful because he was at least able to convince the Hidden Stone to open up commerce with them- Ryogakure offered precious metals in exchange for curated weapons.
They would need to acquire a workforce willing to mine...
As Hashirama talked his ear off with excitement over the times of peace the world was collectively working towards, Kakuzu noticed a young boy he recognized- older, more frazzled, more dangerous, but he remembered the child nonetheless.
They had been walking through Senju gardens as this had happened. In a plot of barren land, Tobirama stood with his back turned to them. The child in question was lined up with other children- all of them had hitai-ite with Konoha's symbol on their foreheads.
Danzou Shimura- there was no doubt about it. The fire and drive in those dark eyes was just about the same as what he had seen when he had been dead- even though the hate wasn't quite there.
"Good job, Hiruzen. Danzou, you could stand to learn something from your classmate."
Kakuzu's eyes narrowed a second after Danzou's own looked away from the Senju, perceptibly darkening at his elder's tone.
Would it be a stretch to think that, very possibly, the reason why Danzou had so horribly lost his way in the future was because of some childish feeling of inferiority to his fellow shinobi? Specifically, to Hiruzen Sarutobi- a name he also recognized from the future.
The thought that struck him was as impulsive as the one that had convinced Madara to build Ryogakure in one of the least comfortable places on the face of the planet.
"Have you thought about a possible exchange between Ryogakure and Konohagakure's genin?" he interrupted whatever Hashirama had been going on about, "Our numbers are small, yes, but we have much work that needs to be done, Konoha genin would be safe within our lands, and this would only aid in strengthening political relations."
He wasn't sure how this might help him get closer to Danzou... but he would think of something.
Hashirama hummed in thought for a few seconds, then answered, "I'll take the thought into consideration. We don't have many allies we can truly trust with our genin; maybe having Konohagakure and Ryogakure be sister villages would aid both in the future."
Kakuzu nodded; Danzou and Hiruzen got into a stance to face each other while the rest of the children moved away; Hashirama took him to lunch.
Danzou Shimura and his team were the first batch of genin sent to Ryogakure as part of their exchange.
Madara questioned Kakuzu's impulses and Kakuzu merely explained that Konohagakure was their only trustworthy ally at this point and they were sorely lacking in able-bodied workers. Genin were able to complete simple jobs around the Village without risking the stability of what peace they had managed to make within Ryogakure. Madara eventually put him in charge of the official Genin Program of Ryogakure and now Kakuzu's days were filled with transporting supplies that came from Konohagakure and sporadically from Iwagakure while his nights were stuck planning itineraries for snot-nosed brats.
For the most part, Ryogakure's population was comprised of Uchiha members and Mountain natives. There were a few sporadic foreigners that had come at one point to aid in the construction of the bridge system or elaboration of tunnels or creation of homes within rock and eventually chosen to stay. A few Konoha natives had decided to stay and aid Ryogakure in construction- all the while taking advantage of the booming trade routes with Konoha and small markets of Ryo.
The first big store that established itself in Konoha was one for elaborated metals- a blacksmith from the Hidden Stone picked up on the need for weapons and other metal products and had packed up his whole life and come here, escorted by a genin team led by Danzou Shimura and Izuna Uchiha.
Danzou, if his sources were correct, was contemplating staying in Ryogakure for good. With Izuna Uchiha as his temporary-jounin sensei, he and his team had improved by leaps and bounds.
Well... it had taken very little effort on his part... but maybe that was all that was necessary for him to do to change Danzou's fate for the better.
If the little prick became too objective and pragmatic, though, at least he'd be close enough to kill.
The Shinobi World War broke out just as talks began with Sunagakure to open trade routes for their spices and textiles.
With a shinobi force mostly composed of Uchiha or young genin, Ryogakure attempted to steer clear from most fighting. Any projects to make contact with the outside world were halted- so the bridge and creation of better tunnels, along with a few other diplomacy projects stopped- and Ryogakure cocooned into itself. Tenshikage Madara (and wasn't it just absolutely gaudy to call oneself a shadow at the same time as a son of heaven?) decreed that Ryogakure would close its borders and not allow anyone but a select few to leave.
Because of this proclamation, Danzou Shimura and his genin squad officially asked to become genin of Ryogakure, renouncing their Konoha citizenship, to be able to aid in the war.
As the five Great Villages fought with each other, Ryogakure continued to grow, isolated as it was. A few months into the fighting, Madara opened Ryo's doors to refugees of the Land of Mountain that had been attacked by Kumogakure's forces in an attempt to further isolate Konohagakure's allies, Ryogakure. Apparently, Kumo thought that they wouldn't be able to survive without their people on the outside... never did they think that Ryo already had a steady agricultural culture that could feed the village easily.
Their population grew further as Konoha citizens bought their way into their borders, seeking a reprieve from the constant bombardment suffered by Hashirama's land.
It was as Kakuzu was forced to watch Madara struggle with the creation of a proclamation for refugees and the conduct they were expected to have while within Ryo that he noticed that their village was now in danger.
The only people that knew how to enter Ryo were their shinobi and the natives from the Land of Mountains, yes, but all it took was for one person to lead any enemies their way and then... they would all be trapped. Entering Ryo wasn't easy because of the very reasons that trading with others wasn't easy. But if just one bastard got in, it wouldn't be difficult at all to destroy the whole village.
He informed Madara of this and any aid that may have been given to non-Land of Mountains natives was suspended. All of their shinobi were told that during wartime, no one from any Hidden Village would be allowed into their home. The Land of Mountains refugees that came were only allowed to enter if they promised never to leave.
Plans for traps, false passages, and other dangerous surprises within the tunnels that led to the outside world were drawn up within a day.
The war lasted long enough for Danzou Shimura to become an adult jounin that led countless successful expeditions to aid Konohagakure.
At some point Hashirama had tried to push peace talks by giving the great Hidden Villages chakra monsters- Kakuzu had been too busy drawing up plans for fuinjutsu and genjutsu experts to create some kind of mass illusion to surround Ryogakure and its nearby lands to be able to run to Konoha and tell him that was the dumbest idea he could have ever thought of.
Well, at least Ryo was afforded one of the monsters. Madara had pushed and he had gotten his way... and it really wouldn't surprise Kakuzu to know that this was the reason why the war had been drawn out another decade or so.
Unlike Kumo, and Iwa, who received two beasts each due to their influence, Taki, Konoha, Ryo and Kiri all received just one beast. Some of said beasts were transported within jinchūriki and Kakuzu wasn't sure how he felt about having the container of Isobu in the village he knew was still very susceptible to just one attack. The meek child was terrified of everything and everyone; which further made Kakuzu wonder if it would be a viable plan to just throw him out, allow the elements to take him, and have Isobu released and free to roam and leave their village alone for the rest of eternity.
The Tenshikage had a very different idea, though, for the child and adopted him into the Uchiha clan without caring about which traditions he was breaking by such an action. Izuna's team was officially given the task of bodyguarding the young boy as a permanent assignment... and Kakuzu didn't wake up at any point for the following decade without a headache born of stress.
Hashirama's death was sudden and unexpected.
Word was received two years after Isobu had arrived at Ryogakure- it had been brought by Hiruzen Sarutobi's team. The Second Hokage, Tobirama Senju, had sent his team to personally give Madara the news- it was one of the most compassionate things Kakuzu had ever witnessed the younger Senju do. It was the first time Danzou and Hiruzen had seen each other after years of warfare and, when they had seen one another, their embrace had been long and tight.
It seemed that their petty rivalry had been washed away along with their innocence.
Madara, predictably, attempted to celebrate Hashirama's death while in public. His life-long rival was dead! It was cause to rejoice!
No one questioned where he disappeared to for the following month- Kakuzu merely took reigns of the Tenshikage's most pressing duties while Hiramori continued working with his Land of Mountains natives.
The war went on. Ryogakure continued to grow as other villages withered and faced almost total destruction.
More Konoha natives that were tired of the ceaseless fighting tried to enter their lands... Kakuzu denied them entry, even though he allowed some of Ryo's resources to be diverted to the outside to aid these refugees set up kilometers away from Ryo into semi-nomadic lives... all the while he pushed for the passing of a proclamation that would allow those shinobi to accept jobs for Ryo in exchange for a good chunk of the pay to go straight to Ryo.
Their village was, first and foremost, supposed to stand for the accruement of money, after all.
Madara was never quite the same after Hashirama died.
The change was sudden, albeit something Kakuzu was grateful for. He became more careful after this, compassionate. The Taki native didn't know what had changed in him, but it seemed like the Uchiha now understood that Ryogakure was not just a place where his Uchiha clan members could rule- he understood that Ryo was his; its people were his people.
Tobirama Senju was able to acquire peace through an armistice after a few more years of warfare after Hashirama's death.
The only village to come out stronger had been Ryo- they were hated by just about everyone on the surface.
Eventually, they were able to begin sending out their own people to aid in reconstruction and aid efforts and, even though they were loathed and envied, they continued to amass riches because other villages needed them.
With Konohagakure's reconstruction and need for commerce, the Tenshikage was able to secure a contract with their genjutsu experts to begin working on teaching Ryo's younger shinobi with affinities for such a type. Hiramori, now with his hair graying and his body not quite able to get up and down the mountain as in his youth, and he were tasked with going to Uzushiogakure to ask for fuinjutsu teachers.
Kakuzu hated diplomacy... and yet he was somehow still tasked with these stupid tasks while Madara Uchiha luxuriated in the safety of Ryogakure.
Establishing a positive relationship with the Uzumaki clan wasn't easy because they were a bunch of annoying assholes that didn't know how to shut up... but Hiramori was somehow able to convince the village leader into a silly bet that the civilian somehow won and a few days later they returned to Ryo with ten experts that were eager to teach new blood.
Life went on; Kakuzu continued being forced to deal with genin even though he hated kids; the Tenshikage prioritized Ryogakure over anything else; Isobu's container began to train to become a genin under Danzou Shimura; constructions for easier access from the outside world were tentatively began.
At some point Madara decided it would be a good idea to invite full clans, rather than simple refugees, into Ryogakure under incredibly specific limitations. Kakuzu didn't really fight this because he hadn't expected any clan to really decide to move to their small village... and was then promptly surprised when the Himi clan of Konohagakure- well, its last dozen members- asked for entry.
Himi was not a surname he recognized- but Orochimaru was a name he did.
The boy was around eight years old, traumatized at the large loss of clan members, and took to fuinjutsu teaching like a fish to water.
It was at this point that Kakuzu began to wonder if he truly had to continue worrying about the future of the world, considering how changes seemed to be occurring by themselves; without any need for his intervention.
When the Hatake clan, with its numbers in the upper hundreds, demanded to be allowed entrance into Ryogakure, his hypothesis strengthened and he allowed himself to just... live.
Tenshikage Madara was... old.
"Tell me, Kakuzu, why is that you still look like the same as the day I met you while I am turning into a bag of bones?"
Kakuzu didn't wince at the accusatory tone of the Uchiha's words. Instead he shrugged, "Must be the fact that you've only really seen my eyes."
Covered up from head to toe as he always was, it really wasn't much of a stretch to think that time had ravaged him but no one would be able to see such a reality.
Madara's dark eyes, while surrounded by deep wrinkles and spots of age, were as sharp and disbelieving as if he was still in the age of his youth in which he had decided to establish Ryogakure.
"You should be happy you don't age." Madara eventually settled on after a tense silence, allowing himself to sink further into the plush chair behind his office's desk. "It's the worst part of being alive."
He didn't age, sure... but his body was still constantly battling him.
That reminded him, he needed to acquire some new hearts.
"Danzou's little friend, Hiruzen Sarutobi, has done a shit job at quelling Amegakure and Iwagakure's animosities. War is about to break out among the world yet again."
Amegakure... a village where it always rained... if the predictions of the dead were accurate, he would find someone he needed to help to further change the fate of the world there... did he even have to do such a thing now? The world was clearly different.
Kakuzu frowned beside those thoughts, crossing his arms over his chest. "Our defenses aren't ready."
"No." the Uchiha agreed, "Neither is my son."
Isobu's container, Kakuzu thought with some chagrin.
He didn't like the child... he didn't trust the child with the amount of power at his disposal. He still believed they would be better off setting Isobu free to never incur its wrath.
"I am thinking of proclaiming Danzou Shimura as the Second Tenshikage."
Admittedly, Kakuzu was jarred by this statement.
Danzou? Not any of the Uchiha running around?
It seemed that his surprise was clear enough in his eyes for Madara to take notice of it.
"He is the best of the best- and that is saying something with my clansmen giving him proper competition." Madara smirked, a glint coming over his eyes that Kakuzu wasn't quite sure if he should attribute to humor or cruel humor. "It has taken many years and many failures, but I finally understand why Hashirama was picked for Konohagakure."
Kakuzu's eyes widened in absolute shock.
Madara chuckled, "Because I was born to create a better Hidden Village." and, thus, any illusion at believing Madara was capable of serious introspection was shattered.
With a sigh, Kakuzu shook his head.
Madara sobered up soon enough and looked out the window towards his right, which allowed him to look over a good chunk of the lower floor of the village. "Yes, Danzou Shimura will do fine as long as you continue to insist in meddling with Ryogakure affairs."
Kakuzu knew for a fact that Madara didn't know what had happened to him or what any of it entailed... it was... somewhat daunting to know that he knew so little, yet had perceived so much.
One day, he decided to look at the yellowing pages that contained the names of the people he had seen in the future given to him by the cursed dead. At that point he recognized a few names by their future and past selves. Most, though, were names he still did not know from the present; just from the future.
Obito Uchiha and Kakashi Hatake were not really part of the genin program yet, so maybe they had not yet been born. But, with most of those clans living in Ryo, it wasn't too farfetched to think their fates had already changed.
With the separation of Orochimaru, Jiraiya, and Tsunade, maybe Orochimaru stood a chance to not become an insane sociopath. Besides, the reports from his jounin teacher were stellar for someone that had once been so traumatized by the destruction of his clan that he had barely been able to speak.
Nagato, Konan, and Yahiko... those were the names he had learned of that were attributed to a land of constant rain... the symbol he had seen on their etched hitai-ite belonged to Amegakure.
When war broke out, he asked for the Second Tenshikage to allow him to go out to Amegakure to see how it fared in the war. Danzou had been curious as to the sudden petition, but eventually allowed it.
He returned to Ryo with the three orphans and a newfound disdain for war and Konoha.
The children didn't lie. The destruction they had witnessed had been caused by unscrupulous shinobi from Konohagakure. They were much too scared and eager for salvation to lie, he believed. These kids were more trustworthy than the Konoha scum that had destroyed their home.
Danzou had told him that their orphanage would not take care of non-native orphans. Kakuzu had snarled at him that he was being a foolhardy idiot. Danzou then told him that he had nothing against Kakuzu formally adopting the children, though.
And that's how Kakuzu found himself having to carve out a larger apartment from his plot within the mountain to accommodate the children. He wasted a lot of his carefully saved up money in acquiring beds and clothes for them, along with food. But when Konan had tried to tell him that their subterranean home would look nice with decorations, he had drawn the line. If they wanted something as useless as decorations, they would have to work to pay for such things themselves.
His regret knew no bounds as he returned to his house on multiple occasions to find new, gaudy, pricey trinkets that were considered decorations after he had drawn such a line.
Hiramori was more than happy to pay for the kids to complete chores around his house, much like the rest of the Umino family, and so Kakuzu couldn't even scold the children on taking the route of criminals to get what they wanted; they were doing this legitimately.
Hiramori died at an incredibly old age. A year later Madara Uchiha passed away, accompanied in a room by his son, brother, Danzou, and a few of his most trusted clan members.
Ryogakure mourned both those deaths as if some of their most important people had left them... which, they had, Kakuzu conceded... but he hadn't been expecting the village to be so... affected. It was... novel for him to see such a large population care so deeply for two important yet ultimately human men.
The Second World War ended after only a few years of conflict and they were able to continue expanding and strengthening. With Kakuzu as the sole person in charge of screening genin that were capable of becoming chunin, their shinobi were eventually classified among the best in the world.
Life continued.
His children asked for him to take on some kind of last name so they could all share some identifier; they wanted unison; family.
He, of course, refused. He had thrown away a name he wanted nothing to do with for a reason; and he wasn't about to tie himself down to something as sentimental and foolish as another name that would tie him to a group of children he had adopted because he had been forced to.
Fugaku Uchiha appeared in his list of genin at around the same time the Ame-orphans went behind his back with the help of the Tenshikage they had grown rather close to and acquired the last name Kakulji. Around a year later, Konan Kakulji, Nagato Kakulji, and Yahiko Kakulji were cleared to become genin- and they were immediately assigned to the Tenshikage's tutelage.
Kakuzu absolutely detested the surname and refused to utilize it. That didn't seem to matter to the group, considering how, in their minds, such an absurd name was supposed to signify that they were his orphans, even if he didn't want to acknowledge them as his children.
At some point Danzou stated that it would be a good idea to start up an Academy in Ryogakure. Kakuzu wholeheartedly believed that he thought of this because Hiruzen had deemed his own village's academy a complete success.
Kakuzu had not hated the way Ryogakure had been going about molding the younger ninja. The ninja families were all proud and understood the need for quality, so they were strict in teaching their kids. Then when Ryo hosted their monthly genin auditions, Kakuzu was able to weed out who was promising, who would never really make it past genin, and who was really only worth teaching a trade to. For the most part this worked out fine because they had few civilians that were even interested in developing their chakra.
But he did admit that their population was rather large now and maybe it would be a good idea to standardize shinobi education to not have such clear gaps between genin prospects.
It was around this point that yet another World War broke out. So accustomed to warfare, he really did not care much for this conflict- although he did take note of the fact that he heard that Kushina Uzumaki had been saved from Uzushiogakure's destruction from the Uzumaki refugees that came to Ryo, led by the descendants of those old teachers that had once helped educate a generation of genin.
With the aid of these refugees and some other genjutsu experts, his wish to see Ryogakure completely hidden from the outside world finally became a reality. By the time this stupid conflict ended, Ryogakure was obscured by a constantly running genjutsu, powered by fuinjutsu that was well beyond him, and only their people knew how to enter and leave.
Very few wished to leave, though, the only village in the world that had been able to completely avoid conflict for three full World Wars.
Honestly, with how long he had lived, it didn't surprise Kakuzu that years bled together and he wasn't completely capable of separating dates from one another. And he didn't really care to do such a thing because, at the end of the day, such information was inconsequential. People lived and peopled died- he couldn't take up brain power in trying to keep track of something that wasn't directly affecting him.
He had been going to Kirigakure for peace talks when he met with Kisame Hoshigaki, one of the last remainders of the Hoshigaki clan, and Zabuza Momochi, a violent child that had only stopped attacking him when Kakuzu had pinned him to the ground and threatened to slice his throat- he didn't care if he was some random orphan that had survived his village's destruction, he would put down a rabid mutt without any weight added to his conscience.
He still didn't know why he was kept on as a diplomat for the Tenshikage. But Danzou had insisted he go to Kiri and he had returned with both boys refusing to leave him alone. At that point the man had told him the orphanage would, once again, not take care of foreigners. Kakuzu had told him he hoped he would hurry up and drop dead so someone new could become leader of the village.
When his orphans met the savage boys, Konan had immediately taken a shine to Zabuza, deciding to civilize him even though she already had her plate full with a dozen different shinobi duties.
A few years later, they took on the stupid Kakulji surname and Danzou took too much enjoyment from seeing Kakuzu glare spitefully at him because of such news.
By the time Fugaku and his own orphans became official jounin, he saw the names of Obito Uchiha and Kakashi Hatake in the Academy entrance list.
Rin Nohara, Ryogakure's second container of Isobu, was right along those names.
Yahiko was more than happy to take on the role of jounin teacher for them when they became genin, eager to prove to both Kakuzu and the Hokage that he deserved the promotion he had only really acquired through the aid of his teammates.
Things had died down and Kakuzu had no proper understanding of the passage of time by the moment Orochimaru and he had been asked to attend further peace talks in Suna. They had gone because Kakuzu was still being used as Danzou for jobs he did not want and Orochimaru was a great negotiator.
They had gone to Suna, done what they had needed to do to ensure the continuation of trade between their villages, and made to return without much fanfare. As they had walked to the Village's gates, though, Kakuzu had noticed a little boy with light red hair-somewhat pink, really- crying. A shinobi was walking away from him with a look of sadness on her face.
He walked up to the kid without really questioning what he was doing and asked what his problem was. The boy blubbered that he was now an orphan and no one in Suna was going to adopt him because they considered him to be cursed and his only hope, some cousins from Konoha, had denied any relation to him.
It had taken him a good ten seconds to make up his mind before he offered his hand to the child.
Orochimaru said nothing as they returned to Ryo with Sasori, the five year old boy, refusing to let go of Kakuzu's clothes. The boy had clung to him as if he were some monkey and only really let go of him when Danzou had asked if he wanted Kakuzu to adopt him.
I didn't mean to adopt him, was what Kakuzu had wanted to growl at the aged man. But he kept quiet and instead resigned himself to the fact that the asshole would probably pull the same stunt as with the other children if he attempted to voice some complaint.
Sasori was terrified of the sharp toothed Kiri natives that lived with him at first. Eventually the boy had warmed up to them both, though, and they soon became menaces to Ryogakure that were aided by Sasori's inhumanly sharp intellect.
When Danzou proclaimed Yahiko as the Third Tenshikage, some conflict stirred up in Ryogakure. This would be the third non-Ryo native to be given such a post and some of the natives were pissed off at this fact.
Yahiko won his detractors and non-believers over by going out of his way to save Rin Nohara and their precious beast's container when she was kidnapped on a mission with her teammates. While many Uchiha weren't happy with the fact that none of them had gotten the post, they saw that the man had sacrificed his actual arm to ensure that their village did not lose its ultimate weapon- the Uchiha also really valued the chakra beast within Rin because of Madara having adopted her father into their family- so it was as if Yahiko had saved one of their own.
Uchiha were flimsy as long as their pride was stroked.
Orochimaru had just about taken over the post of main advisor at that point for Danzou, so Kakuzu didn't really have much a need to continue helping the Tenshikage.
That didn't stop his brat of a an adopted nuisance from sending him to Iwagakure of all places to continue strengthening their trade relations.
Deidara had seemed to be waiting for someone at the Village Gates when he had arrived and when he had noticed him, the blonde child had run up to him and offered to be his guide for the hefty price of one ryo. Kakuzu had told the child to buzz off, he knew where he was going, and the child had subsequently refused to leave him alone. At one point they had wound up sharing lunch because the brat had zero self-reservation skills and then he had found that the kid was an orphan with nowhere to go and powerful jutsu hidden away in the only scrolls his family had left behind.
Kakuzu wondered if it would be a good idea to kidnap a child from Iwa, which was a village Ryo did not have a good relation with... and promptly decided that if he was able to steal the child, Iwa was not worthy of keeping him.
A teenage shinobi had tried to stop them at some point... and Kakuzu had promptly knocked him out. He may have been more permissive and allowed the boy a victory if he hadn't tried to rhyme all of his words in an irritating manner that had gotten on his nerves in less than ten seconds.
When he appeared at Yahiko's office with Deidara beside him, the boy holding on to a patched-up sack filled with his family's scrolls, Yahiko had burst out laughing and promptly told Kakuzu the exact same thing Danzou had told him the first time something like this had happened.
Renovations to his house were done by the Tenshikage himself because Kakuzu had grounded him for having been so immature while sitting at his official post.
Yahiko, the idiot, had not even tried to get out of the punishment by reminding Kakuzu that he was an adult, the leader of a shinobi village, and so couldn't be punished like a misbehaving genin.
Yahiko was still as much an idiot as Kakuzu remembered him being as a child.
And somehow this was Ryogakure's leader...
Sasori did not get along well with his new little brother.
Kakuzu had to institute a ban on explosives within the house after the second time the idiots blew up the living room.
Kisame had been forced to pay for the repairs because he had been the one left in charge and instead of defusing the situation, he had egged the boys on. Zabuza had, at first, laughed at his fellow Kiri native's bad luck; he had regretted such an action when Kakuzu told Yahiko to put him on D-ranks to learn self-control.
Life continued, Minato Namikaze became Hokage, Rasa no Sabaku became the Kazekage, other people took control of other villages Kakuzu cared little for, and Ryogakure began to branch out into building banking systems within their mountains for the Hidden Villages.
By this point, Ryogakure had established itself as a mercenary village that would do anything for the right price... even though they managed to keep pleasant relations with many of the Hidden Villages. Iwagakure despised them, though, because they thought that Kakuzu had attempted and failed to kidnap one of their beast containers; they were much too proud to admit that Killer B hadn't been taken because Kakuzu had left him alone, rather than because Iwa actually did anything to stop him. They also didn't admit to having fumbled and lost Deidara, though, because orphans were still seen as burdens by Villages until they became something; so that was kind of a favor Kakuzu did... although they did want the kid's scrolls back.
At some point Yugakure sent delegates to open up a bank account with Ryogakure's vaults and Kakuzu had an unfortunate and unpleasant meeting with a teenager named Hidan that had brought the last living member of the clan he had eliminated from his life to Ryogakure under the guise of saving the girl.
And so Takigakure lost a jinchūriki, Ryogakure acquired a second, and Kakuzu was forced to adopt two more brats into his home. This time he had to go about adding space into what had become his wall in Ryo's upper floors. Initially, the plan was for others to move into adjacent areas. Such a thing never happened and now he had no excuse to not expand.
Hidan swore that his Lord Jashin had sent him visions of saving the baby that had the Seven Tails sealed within her and bringing her to Ryogakure to start a new life. He also renounced any Yugakure citizenship, claimed he would gladly kill off his teammates to prove how serious he was, and asked if he would have to undergo any unnecessary tests to prove to the village that he was powerful enough a shinobi to be useful and he wasn't stupid.
Yahiko accepted the teenager's sob-story and promptly turned Yugakure and Takigakure's relation with Ryogakure sour.
What Kakuzu still did not understand, even months later, was how Hidan had managed to kidnap a child from Takigakure- an important one at that-, while working with two Yugakure teammates, and then kept the child's existence hidden for a whole trip to Ryogakure.
Orochimaru dumped four children on his doorstep after Yahiko had allowed the asshole to, somehow, write them into the official records to become part of the orphans he was taking care of.
Kakuzu had promptly told Orochimaru that he either took them back or all four of them would never wake up.
Konan had intervened, gotten Orochimaru to promise becoming their genin teacher at some point- even though Kakuzu hadn't really wanted that because all he wanted was for his house to not grow any further; dammit, it was supposed to have been an apartment with little to no amenities- and Dosu, Kin, Tayuya, and Zaku were all allowed to stay in his home.
At this point, he could not be blamed for how skewed, disrespectful, or rude any more ninja turned out. He had never wanted to be a guardian and he didn't know how to take care of anyone other than himself. The only reason the other kids had turned out fine was because they had been mature enough to take care of themselves or the older children had cared for them.
Konan didn't mind taking on a mothering role, though, when it came to these new four, just like she had done with Sasori and Deidara. Those two, in turn, helped her out with these new kids.
Kakuzu was not parent material and it was outright negligent for the village to allow him to have any kids in his house. Were the explosions not enough to demonstrate he was actually a danger to them?
Zabuza stole Haku from Kiri at some point and Kakuzu threatened him, yet again, with a kunai slashing his throat unless he took the kid away- he was not allowed to even think about dumping him on Kakuzu. And so Zabuza became the kid's official guardian... even if he lived in Kakuzu's house.
His house was more of a compound by the time the youngest kids he had been forced to take care of entered the Academy.
The Kakulji clan, some people whispered in the streets. And that was stupid because all of these children were orphans, at the end of the day. They weren't a clan.
Around this time Kakuzu began to contemplate leaving Ryogakure for good. The village clearly didn't need him anymore... it had grown by itself, at this point, and every important system had either been established or was being established.
It was when he he was informed that Kushina and Minato had survived past their child's birth years ago that Kakuzu decided he had meddled enough in the world to ensure a true change in the future.
Hopefully, Madara would not pop out at any point and fuck what peace they had found up. He really hoped the Uchiha truly was dead.
"Iruka-sensei's the greatest!" he heard Kin tell Deidara as he prepared some of his exploding clay birds. "He's going to teach us about explosive tags tomorrow, Deidara!"
"Now you're going to learn about real art, sis!"
Fū was dancing around the living room, babbling about something awesome that had happened to the equally ridiculous looking Hidan, and Dosu muttered for them to quiet down, he was working on some extra work from Orochimaru-sensei.
This main congregation area was much too big... Kakuzu hated it.
The surly Taki native grunted as he was forced to step over Zabuza's stolen sword- Ryo's relationship with Kiri had soured further when Kisame and Zabuza had decided that, for some reason, they just had to take some of the Seven Swordsmen's legendary weapons. Kiri was still attempting to figure out how to find Ryo, though, so they were safe from true retaliation for now. Although if these two idiots continued going the way they were, Kakuzu would be the first to hand their heads on platters to Kiri just to ensure no real attack befell Ryo.
Kisame and Zabuza should have been executed for such traitorous actions, in his opinion. But because they were considered to be some of their best shinobi, Yahiko didn't know how to say no to his family, and Kiri had never been particularly happy to see Ryogakure prosper, the most they had gotten was being forced to acquire genin squads of their own and a year's worth of in-village missions. This sentence wasn't a big enough scandal for the rest of the population to really try and call the Tenshikage out for favoritism, though.
As he made his way towards his much too large kitchen that was filled with way too many advanced technologies for his liking, he heard Tayuya and Zaku shouting from somewhere deeper inside the compound about some kind of plan that would very likely land them in detention. He sighed heavily as he shook his head- Yahiko's idiocy was a trait that somehow reached all of the kids he was stuck with.
As he prepared himself some coffee, Konan stuck her head inside the kitchen's doorway. She seemed to look over the place before her eyes finally fell on him- as soon as the small smile appeared on her lips, Kakuzu knew she was up to something.
Before she had the chance to speak, he told her he would sooner pack up and disappear than be forced to house another brat.
That only made her smile broaden.
"Lord Third has informed me that he has secured your spot in the Kage Summit- you've got to start packing to go somewhere cold for a full month."
Kakuzu frowned, even if the woman couldn't see such an expression behind his mask. "I'm not going."
"Oh, but you have to. Konohagakure, Kirigakure, Iwagakure, and Takigakure have all asked for your presence."
His coffee finished brewing at that point and he turned away from her, "There is no point in me going. I've already retired from any political work."
"Not officially, father dearest." he bristled at the absurd title, earning an amused scoff from her. "Some wish for you to explain your child stealing proclivities while others wish to open further monetary avenues with Ryo; there's also the jinchūriki theft charge you've got to dispute- oh, and Kiri would like, at the very least, monetary recompense for the swords my brothers stole. So you're going as part of Lord Tenshikage's protection detail and as a talking point."
"I should have left you back in Ame." he cursed and he heard a new whine that most certainly did not belong to Konan behind his back. "How many of you are there in this house?"
"Most of us." he heard Nagato breathe out, "Yahiko's finishing up with a few documents and the Kiri Menaces are supposed to leave their genin any second now."
And then, without him having to ask, Hidan spoke up, alerting Kakuzu about his presence, "Is it true the old man's leaving for a full fucking month? Isn't that like... supposed to be illegal or some shit?"
When he turned around, he found three adults with their heads peaking through the doorway, one on top of the other, and he glared at all three of them.
"I go where I please." he moved to the refrigerator to grab some milk to heat up, then shook his head. "I should have become a missing-nin once Shimura came to power."
There was a beat of silence as he poured milk into a mug, then he heard Konan snap her fingers, "Shimura's going to be attending tonight as well."
With his shoulders hunching in disdain and his annoyance rising, Kakuzu asked the woman just what she meant by 'attending tonight'.
"Party!" he heard come from one of the young girl's mouths outside of the kitchen, and then Fū was barreling past the older ninja to inform him, "We're having a farewell party with the whole family because you're going to be gone for a very long time!"
He wasn't able to see any of this, of course, but he could figure it out from the sounds of rapid footsteps followed by irritated grunts and groans from the three brats that had been obstructing the entrance into the kitchen.
Kakuzu closed his eyes as he blindly opened the microwave door and placed his milk-filled mug inside.
He had clearly changed the future enough.
Maybe it would be alright to disappear if it meant he wouldn't have to deal with any further political issues he cared nothing for.
When he turned around, he was prepared to put his foot down and let these brats know he wasn't going to any summit, so there wouldn't be any goodbye party for him. But at that point he saw Kin poke her head from beneath the arm Hidan had propped on the doorway, eyes wide as she looked at him, before she asked if he could convince Sasori to begin teaching her about chakra threads before he left because the surly puppet enthusiast wouldn't help her if he didn't demand it of him.
The growl died in his throat- then he sighed and shouted for Sasori to stop being a prick. After a beat of silence, the puppeteer pushed past the crowd gathered at the door and demanded coffee in exchange for his services.
Kakuzu glared at him, "Milk's hot. Just grab what's on the pot."
Sasori moved to do so; Kakuzu ignored any of the rest of the brats' comments as he began to serve a new mug of milk.
Maybe he had changed the future too much.
..~..~..
This took me too long to write, but I finally finished it! And I hope that my efforts were worth it to y'all, fine readers!
*Tenshikage- the title I decided on for Ryogakure's leader, is a mix of kage, of course, and tenshi, which was the title given to the emperor of Japan in the olden days, which stands for Son of Heaven. (I would like to take this time to apologize for butchering Japanese naming conventions, I am a filthy weeb that knows nothing of actual Japanese aside from what I've learned from memes)
**I know the Kage Summit, in canon, is only for the five kage of the Great Villages. That's not a mistake. I decided that in this world the other shinobi villages take part in such meetings, they happen more regularly, and actively work to maintain peace in the world via diplomacy between all shinobi villages, not just the big Hidden ones.
***The Kakulji name comes from Kaku (Kakuzu) and lji (orphan). Once again, I am an uncultured weeb.
I'm thinking of possibly expanding the story into different chapters dedicated to specific, much shorter one-shots, that revolve around Kakuzu and other characters that appear or are just mentioned in this story because, honestly, this AU has a lot of exploratory potential.
Anyway, thank you for taking the time to read this monster of a one-shot!