Why hello there…
#26#
"Still working on paperwork Ni-sama?"
Ichigo paused his brush work and looked up from his paper laden desk to see his long-time lieutenant and little brother leaning against the doorframe with a serious air about him. He saw the lack of panic on the man's face and so hypothesized it must not be urgent and focused his attention back on completing the page in front of him while simultaneously responding to the query.
"Clan head paperwork Wataru. It's getting late; you can go home. Your wife and daughter must be waiting for you." Ichigo pointed out.
He personally didn't have someone at home that would anxiously await his return every night like the people around him with a family did. At the end of the day, it didn't really matter all that much what time he ended up at home.
Wataru sighed in exasperation before taking a couple long strides and then seating himself in front of Ichigo's desk in a languid and yet fluid motion that made it look almost practiced.
"I'll wait until you're ready to leave. The girls will understand."
Ichigo felt the fluid motions of his brush slow, and with an almost distracted edge to his strokes he hadn't consciously done, he wondered at what his little brother was playing at with this passive aggressive strategy.
He tried to put it out of his mind for the remainder of the sheet, but not a moment after he put the writing utensil down, he looked up to Wataru and gave the other man a confused glower to show his disapproval without ever having to voice a thing.
"Do you have something to tell me Wataru?" Ichigo inquired softly when the black-haired man merely stayed quiet. "You aren't usually this insistent… unless there is an occasion I am forgetting about?"
Wataru continued to stare back, and honestly, if it were anyone else, Ichigo would have felt as if he were being silently judged and found severely lacking.
"I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt here, Ni-sama. Why have you not spoken with Sōsuke-kun yet?" The man asked instead, completely ignoring Ichigo's question in lieu of asking one of his own.
Ichigo felt a pang in his heart at the thought of Sōsuke and the grief he could constantly taste in the brunet's reiatsu. He knew it wasn't something people could generally discern, but Ichigo felt so attuned to his whole family, extended and otherwise that he swears he could drown himself in other's emotions if he let himself sink into it.
"It's not the right moment." Ichigo replied back numbly, feeling almost lost at sea with where this conversation is going. "Truthfully, it never will be."
Wataru scoffed. "That doesn't mean it shouldn't be done."
Ichigo took a deep breath, thought about his own losses in life and then released the air in a measured manner that deliberately slowed down his raging heart.
"Making this world safe for everyone, ensuring it can be done, forcing it to happen- it's something that I cannot be lenient with, and that's exactly what I have been doing lately. Slow, cautious, complacent."
"Ichigo." Wataru whispered harshly, the words snapping the orange head back into the present and focusing back on his pale faced younger brother. "We cannot have you of all people fall into a mad quest to make the world into a fucking paradise just because you think it's your responsibility or something equally as stupid."
Ichigo reeled back, almost feeling as if he had been slapped right across the face. "She was killed, Wataru." He replied back hoarsely. "Mai- Sōsuke's mother was killed and everyone is calling it a Spirit King damn tragedy of circumstances. Like if the fact that just because the little kids, elderly and the ill died due to the poor conditions after that hollow attack and not the actual carnage doesn't make it a murder."
"Ichigo," The black haired man interrupted kindly. "There is nothing that could have been done. It all happened so quickly and it was right after the last Shinigami patrol too."
"If the damn Central 46 hadn't thinned out the allocated patrols to the districts, this wouldn't have happened." Ichigo insisted. "One step forward, two steps back with those assholes and I am getting sick and tired of diplomatically cleaning up their mess like some stupid janitor when I'm-!"
"Shiba Ichigo." Wataru reminded him tersely. "You are Shiba Ichigo and the sun will not rise tomorrow if you ever stop being unapologetically yourself. You are the pride of your Clan, the reason it still exists stronger then ever before, and our absolute guiding star in the darkness."
Ichigo felt the breath knocked out of his lungs and could do nothing but stare dumbfounded at the proclamation being leveled his way. What was he supposed to answer to that?
"It's unfair." Wataru continues. "It really is. You are but one man with so many responsibilities and you constantly continue to gain more. Even then, you always end up being stubborn and sparingly allow others to help and that only puts you further up that pedestal like some sort of deity or something." Ichigo twitched at the comparison but stayed quiet. "There's nothing I or anyone else can do about that." Wataru ended with a finality that almost had him reeling. "What I can do, is remind you."
Ichigo took a breath, then another, before he finally felt like he could speak without tearing at the seams. "About?"
"You are not just the pride of our Clan." Wataru reminded him. "You are my brother, just as I am yours. You are Haruka's brother, just as she is your sister. You are Isshin's, Hiro's, Yoruichi's, Kisuke's and Sojun's Uncle, just as they are your nieces and nephews. You are the 10th squad's Captain and they are your subordinates." He paused, and for a second, Ichigo almost felt like he were a second away from bursting into tears.
"Way to make me have a whiplash of emotions, Wataru." Ichigo reprimanded lightly around the knot in his throat, feeling like he needed to clear the air a bit lest he drown in it.
Wataru jutted his chin upwards, leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms before setting his jaw stubbornly in a move Ichigo was certain he'd learned from him. "Well I'm not done." The black-haired man threatened. "Most importantly for today Ichigo. As everyone is well aware of- you are Sōsuke's, just as he is yours. All your other nieces and nephews have an adult influence beyond you, but Sōsuke- he only had two and now he only has you. So man up, stop brooding on the things you can't change right now and go find your kid."
Ichigo took a rattling breath, cursed, stood up so quickly he hit his knee on the table which caused him to curse again, before throwing himself out the window so quickly he was almost certain Wataru hadn't been able to catch the lone tear that went down his cheek.
He knew where he'd find Sōsuke.
#26#
Tracking the brunet hadn't been hard. Convincing him to step away from Mai's grave and into the warmth of the main building of the Shiba compound had taken more than a little cajoling- though he did manage to get through to Sōsuke after Ichigo had decided to join him on the grass and wait it out which had in turn made the brunet appalled enough at Ichigo sitting on the floor to just shuffle them indoors instead.
Once inside, with a warm cup of tea in each of their hands but still not knowing what to say, Ichigo merely sat as close to Sōsuke as humanly possible and wrapped the other in a half hug.
At first the brunet lay stock still in Ichigo's side, but as the clock continued to tick, and nothing earth shattering seemed to happen, Sōsuke relaxed into the embrace and felt something besides numbness for the first time in quite a couple days.
"I don't know what to do now Ji-sama." He admitted fearfully. "She's just… gone."
Ichigo sighed, pulled the brunet closer into his side before replying. "Live Sōsuke." He imparted. "Live a life you can be proud of, so that one day, when your soul crosses paths with hers eons later, you can be happy to tell her all about it."
Sōsuke mulled this over, the darkness of the night cloaking them into an imagined peacefulness that almost enveloped him. "Do you think we get to meet the people we lost before?"
Ichigo had wondered about that. It was a nice thought at the very least, but what guarantee did one have that you would meet people you knew in your previous lives when you or them didn't remember? He knew now though, that it always happened, even when you didn't know. That's just how the world was run, how it'd been designed and continued to work by the hand of a burned-out God.
"I do." Ichigo replied as he smoothed out one of Sōsuke's curls away from his face. "I'm certain of it."
The room remained silent, and after too long of a pause, Ichigo looked down to see if Sōsuke were still mulling over his words before finding the brunet sound asleep into his side instead.
Ichigo smiled, caressed Sōsuke's hair one last time before shifting in a way that would allow him to heft the brunet into a carry to take him to a proper bed.
He had loads of guest rooms, but Sōsuke stayed often enough that there was actually a room a couple doors down from Ichigo's set aside exclusively for the brunet, and as Ichigo walked into the designated sleeping quarter, he was not surprised to see that the staff had already rolled out Sōsuke's futon for him.
He set the brunet down, tucked him into the covers and regarded the young man sleeping away calmly for the first time in a while. Sōsuke looked young like this, barely out of his teens, and even then, it was questionable. Ichigo knew that it was a bit of a sore spot considering the rest of the brood all seemed settled into their mid to late 20s, but it was a testament to Sōsuke's own power to see his aging slow down so much now that he was properly an adult.
Ichigo stood from his crouch next to the futon, before whispering into the darkness as he exited the room and towards his own bed.
"Sleep well my child."
#26#
You are concerned. The Spirit King asserted. I can sense it more clearly than ever before.
Ichigo hummed in acquiescence as he languidly played with the koi fish made of light swimming lazily under the floor of the mindscape he had become accustomed to after all these years. There was something about this place that always had him avidly conscious of all the predicaments he was juggling in the waking world, but also had him oddly bereft of any emotions tied to them too.
"They are getting on my nerves." He admitted, focusing on the feelings he knew he had while awake that almost eluded him now. "Tℎe C𝑒n𝑡r𝑎l 46 𝑖s o𝑛c𝑒 𝑎g𝑎i𝑛 𝑏e𝑖n𝑔 𝑎 𝑡h𝑜r𝑛 𝑖n m𝑦 𝑠i𝑑e."
If they are being inconvenient, The being interjected mildly. then simply get rid of them.
"I could." Ichigo asserted; he knew he could. Was certain of the power he had as Clan Head of Clan Shiba, as a Senior Captain of the Gotei 13, as a Godling of war that he is. He can-! "NO." he interrupted himself, breathed in, breathed out and slowly unclenched his fist from where he had unconsciously grasped one of the light fish in a tight hold that had accidentally painted the water floor in black tendrils. "I should not."
The spirit King hummed, neither denial or approval. Maybe you have been here too long if you are having problems keeping your mortal thoughts.
Ichigo grimaced, continued to play around in the water and observed the black fade and the clarity return as the floor slowly started to mirror the starry sky once again. "I thought I was going to be able to make it this time."
Patience. The being projected. It took me many a centuries to remain myself when attached so firmly to the brink of reality. Twenty minutes in twenty years is remarkable.
"So you say." Ichigo deadpanned. "It feels like twenty seconds to me. The glimpses I caught of the future didn't tell me anything." He groaned.
Patience. The God repeated. I will not make the same… miscalculation with you, as I did with that Childe.
Ichigo found himself scoffing as he once again found his mind wandering with thoughts about the Spirit King's mistake with Ywach. He wondered, not for the first time mind you, what he was doing allowing this all to happen when the consequences could be dire.
"I should leave." Ichigo said instead of all the other things he felt rattling in his head that he knew the Spirit King would not want to talk about anyway. "While I don't lose time in the conscious world, you and I both know this is still not the most pleasant of experience for me."
You will learn. The being asserted. And someday it will be as quick and painless as falling asleep.
The orange head paused to think about this and found the notion almost bone chilling. "Someday." He whispered to The being. "Though I'm not sure you'll see it." Ichigo divined. "𝑆o𝑚e𝑑a𝑦."
#26#
As Ichigo opened his eyes to the outside world, he calmly asserted that while he had not overstayed his time in the Spirit King's mindscape, he had certainly 'slept in' as he usually did when visiting the place in his sleep and knew that as expected, Daisuke would be well aware that Ichigo was having One of Those Days.
Sure enough, as the orange head straightened from his futon into a sitting position, he felt a slight headache at his temples and knew that the morning would be plagued with the occasional dizzy spell that would make him just the slightest bit off-balance.
Yay.
"Ichigo-sama." A slight knock came at his door, and he heard more then saw his loyal retainer slide the shoji open with practiced ease. "I have brought some ginger tea."
Ichigo sighed in defeat before straightening himself properly in a seated position and reaching for the tea that was being handed to him with steady hands. He remembers a time when that used to not be the case and is stupidly pleased that he's at least gotten rid of most of the physical side effects that used to hit him in the past.
He takes a calming sip of his warm tea, hums pleasantly at the perfection and turns to give Daisuke his full attention. "What's my schedule for today?"
Any other day Ichigo would not even bother asking. He knows very well what he is meant to do every day at any given time and is better at keeping track of himself than many people give him credit for. He knows, however, that the moment he failed to rouse at his usual 6 am schedule, Daisuke would have shuffled his duties to a lighter load and nothing Ichigo has said or done had ever succeeded in bypassing the adjustment.
"The meeting with the Captain Commander is still on the agenda, though it has been pushed out to noon instead of the initially scheduled 9 am. Therefore, your other engagement previously set for then has been cancelled until next Thursday -it will be in your planner for your review. Yasahiro-sama will be joining you for breakfast once you are able, and I have been advised the little heir will be with as well." Daisuke advised in quick and practiced succession. Honestly, Ichigo doesn't know why he even bothers with an agenda, Daisuke probably has his life planned out for him down to the last bathroom break and probably even his death date.
"That is expected of me, Ichigo-sama." Daisuke interjects calmly. Whoops, did he say that out loud? "And I am sorry to inform you Ichigo-sama, but your departure from this life is not at all factored in my calculations."
Wait, what? Did he just expect Ichigo to never die or something?
"I'll ignore that, for my own sanity if nothing else." Ichigo berated lightly, taking a couple fortifying sips of his tea before passing the empty cup to his retainer. "Where's Sōsuke?"
"The… young master had breakfast and left for work a little over an hour ago. He has asked that I send word once you have awakened." Daisuke reported succinctly.
The orange head hummed at that but imagined that if Sōsuke felt well enough to go to work today, that meant he could be left until later when Ichigo felt less off kilter.
"Go tell Hiro-chan I'll be ready shortly."
Daisuke stood up from his previously kneeled position, walked towards the open shoji door and had a quick whispered conversation with someone outside Ichigo's line of sight, before walking back into the room and closing the door behind him.
"Which kimono should I pull out for today Ichigo-sama?" he asked, acting as if he hadn't just ignored a direct order.
Ichigo sighed again. Why did he even bother?
#26#
"I'll get that Ichigo-sama!" A frazzled female retainer reached out and took the pot from it's place on the table before refilling the cups and taking all the empty plates with an honestly terrifying efficiency that almost had Ichigo reeling. Honestly, crazy the lot of them.
From the other side of the table Yasahiro chuckled at Ichigo's predicament and he automatically scowled in his nephew's general direction. He might have been off by an inch or two, but Ichigo absolutely refused to make a big deal of it and simply readjusted his head when the world stopped moving under him.
"Glad to see that hasn't changed since the last time we had a meal together." Yasahiro lightly teased, and honestly, if Ichigo wasn't so delighted at the easygoing way the man now carried himself with, he would have totally reprimanded the brat.
"It's annoying." Ichigo gripped instead. "I'm not an invalid."
Yasahiro continued to snicker, and Ichigo found his shoulders slumping involuntarily.
"Honestly Ji-sama, if you'd let them, I'm sure the staff would always act this way around you. 'We can't let our Ichigo-sama work more. He already does so much for this Clan!'" The man teased, imitating the words Ichigo had heard in passing one to many times for his liking from more than a few of the staff around the main compound. Ichigo had even heard a rumor that the chefs constantly tried to outclass each other to make sure their dishes got featured at his table for meals.
Absolutely crazy.
"Sofu!"
Ichigo felt the little hand slap his leg to get his attention and turned down to look at the happy and cheerful owner of the voice. It was honestly a little baffling to see that the little black haired boy with a giant grin on his face looked so much like him when he was around 5 or so years old.
"So~fu!" The child repeated, absolutely appalled at the lack of attention Ichigo was giving him.
"Kaien." Yasahiro lightly scolded. "What did I tell you this morning?"
The little boy pouted, and Ichigo felt absolutely no shame at melting into soft putty in the face of those chubby cheeks and dejected expression. He raised a hand to the little boys head and caressed his face before ruffling his hair.
"It's fine Hiro." Ichigo appeased. "A grandchild is allowed to demand attention from their grandparents." He kept his eyes on the same child he called grandson regardless of the fact grandnephew was more accurate and gave the boy a gentle smile. "Don't listen to your father. Did you need anything little sea?"
"Sofu!" The boy repeated once more, this time indigent for an entirely different reason. "I'm not little! I'll be twenty-two next month!"
Ichigo chuckled lightly and brought the boy closer into a half hug that despite earlier proclamations of not being little anymore, Kaien still melted into it. "Well, if being twenty-two means you're not little, what does that make me?"
The boy hummed in thought, glancing up to Yasahiro who looked amusedly exasperated and then back to Ichigo with a speculative glance. "Chichiue is old. He's like, two hundred! How many years do you have, Sofu? You don't look older than him."
Yasahiro tried to stifle his laughter but absolutely failed at hiding his snort and Ichigo automatically glared his way. Not even half a second later he furrowed his brows in slight discomfort as his headache flared and dropped the expression in favor of grumbling annoyances into his tea.
"Don't let Ji-sama's appearance fool you Kaien-chan. Remember what I told you about aging last time you asked about Ojī-chan and Obā-chan?" Yasahiro explained kindly. "My parents look older but-?"
"Sofu is oldest." Kaien replied automatically, almost sounding like if rehearsed which left Ichigo wondering. "So how old are you, Sofu?" he directed the last at Ichigo, and as he pondered how to best answer, the puppy dog eyes made an appearance and he folded like a wet paper towel.
Still, folding doesn't mean he'd give his actual age, he'd been going off his assumed age for centuries now so it was odd to even think of his real age most times.
He heaved a sigh, playing up the resigned air as if it wasn't obvious he had totally given in to the little boy's demands. "I'm barely 800 years old Kaien-chan."
Yasahiro coughed into his hand with a badly disguised "804." Stifled into his fist as Ichigo turned back to give him the stink eye.
"Wow Sofu." Kaien exclaimed in awe. "That means you're ancient!"
This time Yasahiro made no move to even pretend he wasn't cackling like a mad man and Ichigo absolutely lost it. This was so unfair. He was actually only 722 years old but since he had added a couple decades to his age to not appear overly suspicious, he was stuck with the increased number. Still, he wasn't that old. I mean, he's totally still in his prime!
"Wait." Kaien interrupted Ichigo's musing. "But are you actually ancient when you look even younger then Chichiue though? Does your back hurt too Sofu?"
"Hey, hey, hey! Don't go tattling on your father like that!" Yasahiro squawked in indignation, and Ichigo felt absolutely and totally vindicated.
"I don't." Ichigo asserted proudly. "Make sure to keep active so you can age gracefully like me."
Yasahiro's appalled yell of- "That has nothing to do with that!"- was drowned out by Kaien's enthusiastic cheer of agreement and exclamations that he wanted to grow up to be Just like Sofu!
Ichigo 9,764 - Yasahiro 3
He's still got it.
#26#
"Hm, it might be best if we simply reschedule."
Ichigo found himself snapping back to attention and focusing on Yamamoto once more at the words before he had to blink back spots forming at the edge of his vision and he felt a slight vertigo take over him.
Damn. It's been more than two years since he's been this affected by the God's influence. Guess he'd really botched that one up. He really should have known better than to mix waking problems with his training; it only made things volatile.
"I have not seen you this bad in a while."
The voice cut through his haze again, and Ichigo found himself forcing his concentration to the forefront of his mind as he absently focused on smoothing out the frazzled edges of his reiatsu.
"I didn't have a good night." Ichigo explained tersely, utterly appalled at the fact that he could still clearly feel the loose patchwork he'd hastily done to appease the hole in his reiatsu which he had not so affectionately started to call divine fuck you's.
The whole reason why he was always so unbalanced was because channeling the energy made it almost erode at his reiatsu in a way that had this divinity taking the place of his usual power. However, since he couldn't really control it, he was constantly having to forcefully eject himself from this mode and the gap left behind caused the incoordination. If he had calmly fazed out of it and filled the spaces with his reiatsu as the process went, he wouldn't have to deal with this, but it was a hard going process and saying it was easier than doing it.
"Anything you'd like to pass along from his Majesty?" Yamamoto inquired craftily, and really, if it were anyone else -not that many people even knew Ichigo had a line open to the linchpin of the worlds- Ichigo would have decked them for the gal.
"Well," Ichigo began conversationally. "They don't seem to care much for the Central 46 either."
Yamamoto rolled his eyes, very well versed in Ichigo's dislike of the crafty council and not at all surprised at this tidbit of information. "Will they do anything about it?"
Ichigo found his shoulders slumping and almost slouched in his seat like an unruly teenager if not for the fact he was way past that kind of attitude. "No."
"Didn't think so." Yamamoto asserted. "Did they say you should do anything about it?"
The orange head paused, mind flashing back to the conversation from last night and the implications behind it.
There was no way for it to work no matter how much he thought about it. Such an imbalance would break the system, and even if he ignored that fact, the power vacuum left behind could. Maybe he can start weeding out individuals again. Surely if it's done slowly and methodically all of the chaos can be avoided? They are being inconvenient after all. He could simply get rid of them.
He could simply-
He could-
He-
If they are being inconvenient, The being interjected mildly. then simply get rid of them.
He was not doing anything until his fucking reiatsu was back to normal and he could function like a proper rational person without the stupid influence left behind of divinity stopped twisting his thoughts.
Ugh!
"Sensei," Ichigo began hesitantly, moving his gaze back to look at the old man now that he was back in the present. It shouldn't have been long, and the fact that Yamamoto had stayed calmly seated instead of calling for Retsu-senpai was proof enough. "I think it's best I head home. I'm feeling a bit under the weather today."
Yamamoto hummed in agreement before standing from his seated position and in a motion quicker than Ichigo could compute, hauled him on his feet before guiding him in the general direction of the doors.
"It's been years since your last sick day. Go home and rest, I am certain the tenth will function without you, at least for a couple days." Yamamoto conferred.
Honestly, all this tip toeing around the issue was just plain annoying. Ichigo swore he would never again try and out-stubborn the stupid thing again. He found it so ridiculously annoying that it had probably been the Spirit King's plan all along to teach him that patience he had been preaching since they started practicing this four years ago.
"I'll take it from here, Yamamoto-sama." Daisuke assured the older man once they reached the hallway.
The Captain Commander hummed in agreement but still accompanied them all the way to the first division gates where he paused but didn't let go of the uncharacteristically kind grip he had on Ichigo's elbow.
"Ichigo." The man called out, tone calm but grave in equal measure. "Is there anything you'd like to tell me?"
Ichigo stopped to think about it for a second before nodding slightly to himself in agreement and then turning up to look at his long-time teacher. "Probably."
Yamamoto gave a piercing gaze before nodding in understanding. "Should you tell me now?"
Ichigo shook his head before he could even think about it and found another wave of nausea hitting that had his knees buckling slightly and would have made him at least stumble if it weren't for the solid grip he had on both arms from the two men.
"Best to let it go for now Sensei. I've got an Almighty headache right now." Ichigo rebuffed and yet answered. If the slight tightening of Yamamoto's grip on his arm was anything to go by, the message had been received.
Daisuke took this as his cue and he turned to look at the Captain Commander before etching a slight respectful bow. "We'll be on our way sir. Thank you for your consideration and apologies for the last-minute cancellation."
"No need." Yamamoto replied easily, though his eyes did not stray from Ichigo's steady expression. "I'm certain we will have other more opportune moments to discuss things."
Daisuke bowed slightly once again, before flash stepping away with Ichigo in tow.
#26#
"Honestly Ji-sama, if you had sent more detail in your missive, I would have brought someone from the 4th with me."
Ichigo took a couple fortifying breaths before he felt along the edges of his reiatsu and tried to stitch together the edges with the help of the kaido being activated throughout his tenketsu.
"It is fine Sōsuke. I have full confidence in your kidō genius." Ichigo placated lightly as he felt some of the smaller gaps smooth over. "Why else would I keep you lot around?"
Sōsuke rolled his eyes but Ichigo was not fooled in the slightest and was not surprised at seeing the light dusting of a blush on the brunet's cheeks from the praise.
Ichigo smiled softly before switching his concentration back to his reiatsu and the fissures he felt he could fix over the easiest. Unfortunately, he knew it wasn't such a simple repair as even flexing his reiatsu in a healing manner wasn't the best idea when he's trying to heal himself, but it's still effective enough that it becomes worth it when he has external help. Ichigo knows he could hasten the recovery to a couple seconds if he were to simply fill in the gap with divinity, but it would only be a patchwork he'd have to eventually get rid of and heal the slow way so there was really no way around it. The fast recovery was only ever an option in a state of emergency.
"Otō-sama?" Sōsuke inquired softly, and while the tone had Ichigo instantly focusing on the other, the words are what completely eradicated his split focus and he instantly gave his full attention to this marvelous and cherished person.
He felt a lump in his throat and had to take a shaky fortifying breath to not burst out crying like a sentimental old fool at the fact that Sōsuke -apprehensive, reserved, nervous, reticent Sōsuke- was calling him father.
"Yes Sō-chan?" he whispered back tenderly, hoping beyond belief that his voice didn't sound as teary as he thought and putting all the care and devotion, he felt towards the boy he met over a century ago now turned man. "Did you have a question?"
"Why are you ill? Ever since you collapsed over two decades ago you've been…" Sōsuke trailed off, his grip tightening slightly against Ichigo's back where he'd been preforming Kaido. "We want to help. I want to help. But you always say you're fine and I just, I don't like seeing you ill and… I can't-"
"Sōsuke." Ichigo interrupted kindly. "I promise you on anything you'd like me to promise; I'm not ill."
Ichigo hoped his words would be reassuring, but apparently, they had the opposite effect, or maybe no effect at all because next thing he knew Sōsuke was inhaling a shaky breath behind him and Ichigo could not deal with tears lest he start crying too.
"Sōsuke." He intoned forcefully. "Come where I can see you please."
There was a slight and hesitant shuffle, but before Ichigo could think to repeat his words, the brunet moved his position to besides him and now Ichigo could clearly see the fear in the young man's eyes.
Ichigo reached out and placed a palm up against Sōsuke's cheek in a similar way to how he had done for little Kaien-chan not even a couple hours ago. Even though Sōsuke was now all grown up too, Ichigo just couldn't help himself and still saw all the chicks as his little brats -this one especially, or perhaps differently might be a better word for it.
"My child," Ichigo called gently, testing the words in his mouth and gauging Sōsuke's expression in the same breath. "I am not ill. This is simply a… side effect of something that is my responsibility."
Sōsuke's jaw clenched, and he looked sorrowful for a second before it was expertly tucked away though Ichigo could still see it clear as day.
"I don't like seeing you ill." The brunet repeated a bit more forcefully. "I can't see another parent wither away while I'm useless."
Ichigo found his eyes softening and he brushed a thumb against the corner of Sōsuke's brown eyes as if to wipe away invisible tears.
This boy was so kind.
So lonely.
"I promise I'll be more than fine once I get it all under control." Ichigo assured. "In the meantime, I'll need everyone's help to get myself through the imbalance, okay?"
Sōsuke looked a bit uncertain, though he did appear to be slightly calmer to Ichigo's senses. "But-"
"I am strong." Ichigo interrupted the fearful words. "Sometimes my strength is too much for my body to carry, and I need to play catch up. Do you understand Sōsuke?"
The brunet paused as if to consider these words before nodding in comprehension.
"Your father is strong Sōsuke." Ichigo whispered back lovingly. "Too strong."
To be continued…
Sofu = Grandfather