Author's Note: Many thanks to GraceMonroe for your review! You make me smile!
Uh, so... yeah. This chapter is also edited for sexual content. (This stretch of chapters was denoted in my outline as, "Remus and Mairead go at it like rabbits.") I hope you're enjoying and it's not becoming boring?
If you are NOT bored by all the sex, an uncensored version is available over on Ao3.
Enjoy!
Chapter Twenty-Two: Near Misses and Learning Experiences
Mairead couldn't stop smiling. It probably made her look quite deranged, considering the fact that she was repeatedly firing a handgun at a target shaped like a human body, but she couldn't help herself. She had spent the last three nights in Remus's bed, and waking in his arms had felt like the most delightful luxury she had ever experienced. She had once again had to sneak out of his bedroom surreptitiously on Sunday morning, as many other members of the Order had spent the night, but by the time she had arrived at breakfast - timed by Remus so that she would arrive several minutes before him - there had only been two seats left, and they were side-by-side. Remus had even held her hand under the table. She had gone back to his room that night, where they had once again made love long into the night.
Mairead emptied the clip, set the gun down, and held the button mounted on the right wall of her lane. The target began to glide towards her.
"Well, well, so that's why you're smiling," Mairead heard Coach Omer say, though the sound of his voice was muffled by her ear protection.
Mairead ducked her head modestly.
"Your aim has improved dramatically," the coach went on. "Still not kill shots, but you hit the target every time, and see these clusters here and here? That's exactly what we want to see."
Mairead cocked an eyebrow. "Just, you know, preferably on target," she said sarcastically.
Coach Omer put his hands on his hips. "Hey, now," he said sternly, "if someone was coming at you and you hit them where you hit this poor son of a bitch, it'd stop 'em."
Mairead shrugged and jerked her head begrudgingly.
Omer shook his head at her stubbornness and clapped her on the shoulder. "Good work."
Mairead returned to her station at the front desk and anxiously watched the clock. As soon as the clock struck ten Mairead jumped to her feet, did her best impression of someone with gracious patience as the last few stragglers made their way out, swinging their gym bags casually and clutching their water bottles, and tried not to rush to the locker room to gather her things. She had covered the front desk for both the entire afternoon and evening shifts as part of the deal she had worked out to offset the cost of her training. She didn't mind her work at the Academy, but Remus had invited her back to his room that night, and she was eager to get back to Grimmauld Place.
She munched on a bag of crisps as she went. She had missed dinner at Grimmauld Place, but based on her experiences with Sirius's cooking, this was not a large regret on her list. He was certainly creative when left to his own devices in the kitchen, but Mairead was not of the opinion that creativity had much of a place when it came to the basic principles of whether food was safe for human consumption.
When Mairead returned to number twelve, she dropped her things in her room and was just about to dash off to the third floor when she paused for a moment, tucked her nose down inside the collar of her shirt, and sniffed.
Woah. Shower first.
Mairead intended to take a quick shower, but self-consciousness quickly drowned out that option. It was later than she had wanted to be arriving at Remus's door by the time she had finished fussing over her appearance, but her hair was dried and tamed into manageable curls instead of a frizzy mess and her legs were shaven.
Remus was already smiling expectantly when he opened the door to her knock. He wasted no time pulling her into his arms and burying his nose in her hair, and Mairead was silently grateful she had spent the extra time on her hair. She leaned into his embrace and sighed happily at the comfort of being in Remus's arms.
Remus pulled away and brushed her hair away from her face affectionately. "How was your day?" he asked, gazing at her as though he had been waiting all day to find out.
"It was fine - long!" she exclaimed. "I worked until ten."
Remus cocked his head to the side in the way she adored. "Really?" he asked, sounding politely confused. "I tried to visit you this afternoon but couldn't find you."
Mairead's eyebrows rose. "You visited me at work?" she asked, feeling her heart flutter at the thought of having someone to stop by to see her.
Remus hummed. "I hope that's all right," he said quickly. "I suppose I shouldn't visit you at the Diagon Alley library anymore, now that it's common knowledge in the wizarding community what I am."
Mairead scowled at him. "Don't be absurd," she said sternly. "I would love for you to visit me. I'd be proud of it."
Remus smiled, but it was clear to Mairead that he didn't believe a word she said and was merely humoring her.
"I mean it," she said, her voice rising insistently.
"Well, generally one has to be present in order to be visited," said Remus, redirecting the subject. "And you weren't anywhere to be found."
"Oh, I was working someplace else," Mairead said.
Remus laughed. "How many jobs do you have, May?" he asked teasingly.
"Well, it depends on what you count as a job, I suppose..."
Remus led Mairead over to the bed and they sat on it together, their backs propped up by the headboard. Mairead told Remus about the Combat Arts Academy. He listened in fascination as Mairead described her training in Muggle methods of self-defense. At first Mairead felt nervous and uncomfortable telling Remus about her association with the Academy, worried that he would be disdainful of the new defense methods she had been exploring, but if he thought less of her for slumming with Muggles he did not betray an inkling of it. He seemed genuinely curious about how Muggles defended themselves without the use of magic, he asked thoughtful questions, and listened attentively to Mairead's responses.
Remus's curiosity and easygoing nature had always eased Mairead's self-consciousness and loosened her tongue, and soon she found herself telling him all about what she had studied so far in preparation for applying for a Healer's program. She suspected he would find the ancient methods of healing to be as fascinating as she did, and she was jubilant when he began making the same connections that she had made between outmoded healing practices and her own struggles with her disability.
"I wonder," he said slowly, "if we did similar research into historic forms of magical self-defense if we might not find something that would work for you."
"That's what I've been wondering!" she exclaimed, actually bouncing on the bed. "I haven't had the time to go looking, but..."
"But the possibility is certainly intriguing," Remus finished her sentence for her.
She nodded. Silence fell as they both considered this possibility.
"So -" Mairead glanced up at him shyly as her insecurities caught up with her. "You don't think that it's, like, really dumb of me, to think about that?"
"Not at all," Remus said with conviction, then added, "And just for the record: I have never once thought you dumb."
Mairead's mouth twitched upwards. "Not even when I forgot to turn in my essay that one time?" she asked.
Remus looked sideways at her, a sly smile playing on his lips. "Not even when you were so tired in class towards the end of the year you tried to take notes with the wrong end of your quill."
Mairead squeaked in embarrassment and hid her face in her hands as the mortifying memory played before her eyes. Not even the pleasure of him laying a staying hand on her back before delicately pulling the quill out of her hands and deftly flipping it over for her had made the laughter of her classmates worth it.
When she opened her eyes enough to steal a glance up at Remus, she saw that he was smiling over at her, but she also saw conflict swimming in his expression. Perhaps it had been a bad idea to bring up their time at Hogwarts.
Hoping to distract him from his thoughts, Mairead leaned against his side, resting her head on his shoulder. She heard him sigh heavily, but then he dropped a kiss onto her hair and wrapped his arms around her.
Turning her face up, Mairead kissed his jaw.
Remus released another breath; this one a bit shaky.
Mairead kissed his jaw again. She kissed him a third time, this time letting her teeth lightly scrape across the light stubble she found there.
A shiver went through Remus.
Smiling victoriously to herself, Mairead let her lips work their way slowly across Remus's cheek. Her plan was to leave a trail of tiny kisses all the way from his jaw to his mouth.
Remus, it turned out, did not wish to wait.
Tightening his arms around her, Remus interrupted Mairead's journey across his skin by crushing his mouth against hers.
Mairead squeaked when she suddenly found herself on her back. Remus appeared to be taking his revenge on her by leaving his own trail of kisses across her skin. His lips traveled across her jaw to her ear, where he nibbled delicately on her earlobe, drawing a guttural moan from Mairead. She felt him smile mischievously against her skin before continuing down her neck. His lips paused when they reached the collar of the shirt she was wearing.
"Is this my shirt?" he asked, pulling back to examine the article of clothing in question, which was tucked messily into Mairead's trousers.
"You lent it to me two nights ago," said Mairead, blinking in a falsely innocent manner. "Don't you remember?"
Remus cocked an eyebrow. "Yes," he said slowly. "And I also remember taking it off you two nights ago."
Mairead felt her face flush at the memory, but tried to shrug nonchalantly. "You'll get it back," she said daintily. "I'll launder it and everything."
Remus pursed his lips. "No, not good enough," he said briskly. "I want it back now."
Mairead tried not to giggle. "But I'm wearing it," she pointed out.
"Not for long."
With a devilish glint in his eye, Remus reached for her top button. Mairead shrieked quietly and caught his wrists in her hands. Remus easily twisted out of her grasp and playfully held her down with one hand and flicked open the first button with the other. He reached for the next button, grinning at her fake struggling.
An urgent pounding at the door arrested Remus's hand millimeters from Mairead.
Mairead and Remus locked eyes.
"I forgot to silence the room," Remus said.
"Oh, shit!" breathed Mairead.
"Remus! Are you awake?" came Sirius's voice from out in the corridor. "Moony, wake up!"
They both looked over at the door. Whatever was wrong, Sirius obviously hadn't heard them carrying on.
"Here," Remus muttered. Taking Mairead's arms, he hoisted her to her feet and hauled her over to the foot of his bed. "Sit down there," he said, pressing on her shoulders until she sank to her knees in front of his bookcase.
Mairead ducked her head, dizzy from having gone from lying down to standing to kneeling in rapid succession.
Remus pulled two books off the shelves, seemingly at random, and piled them into Mairead's hands. He pulled a third book off the shelf, opened it, and deposited it on top of the pile in Mairead's hands. Before Mairead even had time to wonder what he was doing, Remus had crossed to the door and pulled it open.
"Sirius," he said. Mairead could hear the frown in his voice. "What's going on?"
"What's going on is that they've got a complete malefactor for a Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher!" Sirius said hotly as he strode into the room. "She's a fiend! A -" Sirius broke off abruptly when he spotted Mairead. "What are you doing in here?"
Remus's logic struck Mairead just in time for her to hold up the pile of books in her arms and say, "Borrowing some books."
"Oh," said Sirius, sitting down on Remus's bed.
Mairead looked uncertainly back and forth between Remus and Sirius. "S-sorry, should I go?" she asked. When neither man answered, Remus watching Sirius with his brows furrowed and Sirius scowling at the ground, Mairead picked herself up off the ground. "I'll go," she breathed, setting the books down on top of the bookcase.
Her sudden movement caught Remus's attention. "Er, were you interested in any of those books?" he asked, upholding their bluff.
Mairead glanced at Sirius again. "Erm, that's okay. I can come back some other time."
"No, here, you should at least take a few," Remus said, walking over to her. He stood between Mairead and Sirius, and, with his back to Sirius, mouthed, I'm sorry.
Mairead smiled and shook her head. "No, really, I-I wouldn't want to lose track of which ones are yours."
She ducked her head and made for the door, but Remus stopped her with, "I'll write down the titles for you." Mairead turned back to him as he walked over to his desk, tore a scrap of parchment off a roll, and reached for a quill. "That way you'll know which ones are mine."
Mairead could not understand why Remus was continuing this charade, especially since Sirius seemed to be lost in a dark maze of his own thoughts, but she waited while Remus scribbled a note, gathered up the three books, and handed them to her, note balanced on top.
"Okay, thank you," she said. "Erm, good-night, Sirius," she added meekly, then turned and let herself out of the room.
As soon as the door clicked shut behind Mairead, Remus turned to Sirius. "What happened?" he asked.
Sirius let out a growl before speaking. "I Flooed the Gryffindor Common Room like last time," he said, his voice full of anger and resentment. "I was going to tell Harry about everything we discussed: ideas for where to meet, Concealment Charms, the Caterwauling Charm... but before I could get to any of that, Umbridge showed up."
"She came into the Common Room?" Remus asked, dread pooling in his stomach.
"No, that's just it -" said Sirius. His eyes were intense but unseeing. "She stuck her hand through the Floo. She must be monitoring it, keeping an eye out for anybody using the Floo Network."
Remus felt his mouth tighten. "Well, we can hardly be surprised," he said grimly. "We've suspected the Ministry would have ways of watching the Floo Network. Dumbledore has been saying for years that it's not a secure method of transportation or communication."
Sirius nodded but did not respond.
"Do you think she saw you?" Remus asked, unsure whether he wanted to hear the answer or not.
"Nah, she just stuck her hand through, not her head," he said, shaking his head. "But Moony... she almost caught me."
Sirius finally looked over at Remus then, and Remus saw something in the other man's eyes that he was highly unaccustomed to seeing.
Sirius was afraid.
"She almost caught me," Sirius repeated, his voice low and hoarse. "I got out... not a second before her hand came through..." Sirius was back to staring across the room, his eyes wide and alarmed. "If she'd caught me..."
Sirius did not need to finish his sentence. Remus knew perfectly well what fate would await his friend should Umbridge get her hands on him. The thought of that woman attending the administration of the Dementor's Kiss - a satisfied, triumphant smile on her face as Sirius struggled against his bonds, turning his face this way and that, trying to keep his mouth away from the tall, hooded creature slowly advancing on him - was enough to make Remus's knees feel so weak that he sat down hard on the bed next to Sirius, his own eyes envisioning the same thing he had no doubt Sirius's were.
Remus knew better than to point out that incidents like this were precisely why Dumbledore had insisted that Sirius remain at headquarters and keep his head down. He knew that saying as much would only be reiterating the thoughts running through Sirius's mind at that very moment. And it was equally clear that this was the reason Sirius was glowering at the opposite wall. He hated being proven wrong almost as much as he hated having no outlet for his considerable energy and talents.
A lecture was unnecessary. Empty promises about when Sirius might be free to leave were equally useless. Remus settled for a stern pep talk.
"The fact is, she didn't catch you, Padfoot," he said firmly. "She didn't catch you and that's a failure for her and a victory for you."
"Yeah," said Sirius after a few seconds. "Yeah. Fuck that bitch. You know, I reckon Mairead was right about her - they invent words for lunatics like her."
Remus forced a smile onto his face. He was at least somewhat heartened that Sirius appeared to be making an effort to rally.
"What was she doing in here, anyway?" Sirius asked, frowning. "Mairead, I mean."
"Borrowing books, like she said," said Remus in a deliberately careless tone.
"At midnight?"
"She said she couldn't sleep," Remus lied, ignoring the fact that he had every intention of being the reason she couldn't sleep. "So, what were you able to get across to Harry before Umbridge interrupted?"
"Not much," Sirius said restlessly. "I'd just gotten Molly's bloody lecture out and we were just starting in on where their group could meet when Umbridge crashed the party."
Remus clicked his tongue in disappointment. "Well, hopefully they'll be able to work out a safe meeting place on their own," he said thoughtfully. "If I know anything about Hermione she's not going to be comfortable with breaking this many school rules without having a rock solid security plan, so I think we don't have to worry too much there. I think we can let it rest for tonight and regroup in the morning. Maybe Mad-Eye will have some thoughts."
Sirius hummed in agreement. "Maybe."
Remus made a show of stifling a yawn. "Well, I suppose it's getting late," he said, trying not to be too pointed about it.
He needn't have worried.
"Eh, who cares? I can't sleep after that," Sirius said, looking around. "Fancy a game of chess?"
Remus suppressed a sigh.
Mairead sighed. She turned the page of one of the books Remus had lent her, then flipped forward in the book, counting the number of pages until she would reach the end of the chapter. The premise of the story sounded interesting, to be sure, but reading it was just not how she had envisioned spending her evening.
She sighed again and tried to focus on the book, instead of the memory of the way Remus's eyes had glowed while teasing and flirting with her in his bed. She drew her finger down the page, furrowing her brow and rereading the same sentence over again. Remus had always been a tease, and so it should have come as no surprise to her that his bedroom manner would be the same, but she had not realized what a turn-on it would be for her.
But then, everything that had to do with Remus was a turn-on for Mairead.
Mairead scoffed and rolled her eyes, then puffed out a sigh and flipped back to the beginning of the book, having absorbed none of what she had read so far. Her lips began forming the words she was reading, an old studying habit for when she was having trouble concentrating on a textbook. "Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again."
She held the book with one hand and rested the other on her belly. Remus's shirt, which she had decided to wear as a nightgown, was soft beneath her palm. She rubbed the material between her thumb and first two fingers, deciding that its warm, comfortable softness reminded her of its owner.
She had felt comfortable around Remus almost from the start. It was astonishing to her that she had been so wary of him when they had first met. He had so quickly put her at ease and made her feel safe and protected around him that it was easy to forget the ups and downs they had experienced before settling into their routine of meeting twice weekly in his office.
Mairead took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She could still scarcely wrap her mind around the knowledge that she had gotten what she had dreamed of back in school. She never would have believed that Remus could ever feel the same way she did. That she and Remus would one day be together.
She only wished that she had not had to flee Remus's room upon the appearance of Sirius. Or that she could express her feelings for Remus openly, and not just in his bed at night. Or that they could go on dates and hold hands in public, instead of the careful distance Remus maintained between himself and Mairead when other people were around.
Wait - are we together?
Mairead shook her head and dispelled the doubtful thoughts crawling out of the dark corners of her mind. It was just her anxiety trying to ruin things for her like it so often did. She and Remus were still getting to know one another on a deeper level. This was theirs. It was private. It was surely a sign of maturity on Remus's part that he wanted to give them space to discover what they could be together without outside interference. When they were both ready, of course they would come forward. In the meantime, Mairead had to signal to Remus that she was old enough for an adult relationship. If she started whining to him about labels and public displays of affection, he might start to think that she was just looking for another teenage romance and not a serious, grown-up commitment.
Pretty sure grown-ups don't refer to themselves as 'grown-ups.'
Mairead growled in frustration and squeezed her eyes shut. When she opened them, she began reading and did not stop until she had reached the end of the chapter. With a feeling of satisfaction, she reached for the bit of parchment Remus had written on and slotted it between the pages. She smiled at the four lines of Remus's handwriting. A warm feeling blossomed in her belly as she remembered how she had traced her fingers over and over the first note he had ever written to her. How her pining had been almost painful.
So what if she couldn't spend the night with him? She already had more than she could have ever asked for. She closed the book and set it on her nightstand. She extinguished the lamp and settled down beneath the covers, nestling her face into the pillow and imagining that it was Remus's chest.
Her eyes snapped open.
Four lines of handwriting? He had only lent her three books.
Mairead reached for her wand and muttered, "Lumos!" She snatched the book off the nightstand and opened it to her marker. Her eyes scanned down the list of titles. There was the book of poetry that she had flipped through but decided she was too tired for. Next was the book on how the Silk Road had contributed to the cross-cultural exchange of Defense Against the Dark Arts methods (Good for insomnia but not much else, she had mused). The third line contained the title and author of the novel she had ultimately settled on. Then there was the fourth line.
Come back at one o'clock.
Mairead sat straight up in bed. She scrabbled for her watch and squinted at the face.
It was past one thirty.
"Shit, shit, shit, shit," she hissed, and scrambled out of bed.
She crept down the stairs as silently and swiftly as she could, and bit her lip as she tapped softly on his door, praying he wasn't asleep.
The door opened, and Mairead was relieved to find that Remus was still awake, though it looked as though he had been in the process of undressing before bed. He was no longer wearing the jumper that he had had on earlier, and his hair was mussed as though he had just pulled it off over his head. Additionally, two of the buttons on his shirt were undone, revealing a tantalizing view of the hollow of his throat and a few inches of his chest.
"I thought you weren't coming," he said softly, pulling the door open and stepping back.
Mairead stepped into the room and waited while Remus scanned the corridor with his eyes before closing and locking the door and silencing the room. As soon as he turned back to face her she launched herself at him.
Remus laughed and stumbled backwards into the door. "I assumed you'd fallen asleep," he said through a mouthful of her hair.
"I'm sorry!" Mairead groaned against his shoulder. "I didn't see your note until just now! I came as soon as I saw it."
"What were you doing until now?" asked Remus.
"Reading one of the books you lent me," she said.
"Oh, those were just meant as a decoy," Remus said, waving a hand dismissively.
Mairead shrugged. "Well, it's not like I had anything better to do."
Remus twitched an eyebrow. "Would you like something better to do?" he asked in a low voice that sent shivers down Mairead's spine.
Mairead looked into Remus's dark grey eyes and saw lust flitting through them. "Yes, please," she breathed.
Remus grinned at her and began backing her towards the bed. When they reached the edge, Remus helped her to lie back on the mattress but paused before joining her. His eyes swept over her, lying on her back, legs dangling over the edge of the bed, wearing nothing but his shirt, and he let out a small groan. He splayed a hand on her abdomen, running his hand over the fabric.
"Ohhh, I'm going straight to hell," he moaned, dropping to his knees on the floor beside the bed.
Remus reached up under the hem of the shirt, and Mairead giggled and squirmed at the feeling of his fingers tickling the skin of her lower abdomen.
"Sorry," Remus chuckled. His fingers found her panties and dragged them down her legs. Leaning forward, he dropped a kiss onto one of her knees before easing it away from its twin with one hand. The other hand slowly ran up the inside of her opposite thigh, pushing her legs further apart as he went.
Mairead bit down on her lip nervously as she watched the hem of her shirt inch upwards. She remembered the strange, hungry look in Remus's eyes when he had stared at her bare center two nights ago, and she squirmed with discomfort at the thought of him doing that again.
She reached for his hands and intertwined their fingers, hoping he would come up onto the bed, but Remus merely smiled and kissed her fingers before returning to his task. His fingers found the bottom button on the shirt and flicked it open. Remus reached for the second button, his eyes gleaming with anticipation. He undid the second button and pushed the fabric aside.
"H-hey, why am I the only one getting naked around here?" Mairead asked shakily, bracing her hands on the bed and pulling her legs away from Remus and up onto the bed.
Remus blinked in surprise before laughing softly. "I suppose that's fair," he conceded, and he at last rose to his feet and joined her on the bed.
Mairead released a sigh of relief and reached for the buttons on Remus's shirt, but he caught her hands. This was consistent with what Mairead had already observed about him. For whatever reason, he never wanted to take his shirt off in front of her.
Watching her closely, Remus instead guided her hands downwards until they rested on his belt.
Mairead gasped lightly and looked at him, eyes wide and nervous.
Remus's eyes were intent on hers, scanning her expression. "Is this all right?" he asked, voice carefully neutral. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to."
This was not what Mairead had had in mind when she had made her complaint. Remus had always handled all the undressing for both of them. Undressing Remus herself suddenly felt disrespectful, like an overstep on her part. But then, she was terribly curious. And after all, he was inviting her to do it.
Biting her lip in concentration, Mairead felt around until she found the end of Remus's belt. Looking shyly up at him, she silently asked permission.
"Only if you're comfortable, May," he reminded her softly.
Mairead nodded. Remus watched her for a moment, evaluating her. Then, at last, he nodded as well.
Mairead watched his expression curiously while she pulled the end of his belt free from the strap holding it in place. His eyes were dark but calm as she worked. She managed to work the end through the first side of the metal clasp before running into trouble. She could not manage to free the metal pin from the belt hole it was in.
Breaking eye contact, Mairead glanced down at his waist, still trying to work the belt free of the clasp. Her fingers were trembling so badly with nerves that every time she thought she had slipped the belt free it just settled back into place again.
Mairead continued to struggle until Remus reached down and gently laid his hands overtop of hers. "Here," he murmured. With one deft, practiced move, Remus freed the belt of its buckle. "It's an old belt," he said, smiling reassuringly at Mairead's embarrassed expression. "It doesn't like to come loose."
"Oh, okay," she breathed. Remus removed his hands from hers and let her continue. Mairead felt his eyes on her as she fumbled with the button on his trousers. She took a breath to steady herself and let it out in a gush of relief when the button slipped free. She couldn't bring herself to look up at his face, too worried that he would either be trying not to laugh at her or annoyed that she was taking this long.
She swallowed thickly and reached for the zipper beneath the button. Mairead felt her face burning at the sight of a long, hard bulge that ran the length of the zipper. She couldn't help the way her knuckles brushed over it when she lowered the zipper, and she heard Remus let out a strained breath.
"Sorry," she whispered, but far from seeming upset, Remus ran his fingers through her hair and guided her face up to look at him.
"You are so sweet," he whispered before pressing his lips to hers.
Mairead moaned and opened her mouth readily under the guidance of Remus's lips. She reached up to grab a fistful of his downy hair, but Remus wrapped his fingers around her wrist and gently tugged her hand back to his waist.
"Keep going," he breathed against her lips. "Please. Don't stop."
His voice was a quiet moan, a begging that Mairead couldn't have ever dreamed of resisting even if she hadn't already resolved months ago that she would do anything this man asked of her.
Mairead divided her focus between the incredible kiss Remus was leading her in and the new, somewhat daunting task before her. She felt her way back to Remus's trousers. Her fingers once again brushed against him and a bout of shyness hit her, but then Remus moaned a long, helpless sound and his hips twitched at her touch.
C'mon, you've done this before, she reasoned with herself.
Not with Professor Lupin! she argued back.
He's not 'Professor Lupin' anymore, you dolt!
Right. Right.
Mustering up every ounce of boldness she could, Mairead slipped her hands inside Remus's trousers and felt around until her fingers found the waistband of his pants. Fumbling slightly, Mairead tugged at them. Without breaking the kiss, Remus lifted his hips, enabling Mairead to push the material over them and down his legs. Remus took over then, kicking them off the ends of his feet and over the side of the bed.
Now that his trousers were out of the way, a delicious possibility opened itself up to Mairead, one that she had been curious about but unable to explore. One of her hands, still trembling, found the hem of his shirt. She pushed it up and tentatively brushed her fingers over the skin of his stomach. She felt his muscles jump at her touch. Eager now, Mairead pressed both of her hands to his firm stomach, running her hands over his skin, feeling the thin trail of hair that led from his navel downwards.
Remus broke the kiss and made an agonized sound. "May, please," he begged, pressing his forehead against hers. "Please. You're killing me."
"Oh, sorry," she said guiltily.
Keeping one hand on his abdomen to steady herself, Mairead skimmed the other down his stomach, following the straight line of coarse hair all the way down.
Remus groaned and Mairead saw him squeeze his eyes shut.
Biting her lip, Mairead ran the tips of her fingers hesitantly along him. She felt Remus shiver and exhale shakily, but Mairead wasn't concerned. This she knew how to do, and do well.
After a while, Remus began making small noises that sounded like they would have been louder were it not for his rock solid self-control. Mairead couldn't help but smile to herself. He was panting.
Inspired by a sudden idea and emboldened by her success thus far, Mairead used her free hand to press against Remus's chest. Remus obediently turned onto his back and immediately reached a hand behind him to grasp one of the bedposts, his knuckles completely white. His mouth was slack, and his facial expression was one of pure bliss.
Mairead slithered down his side. Remus seemed to come back to himself somewhat at her movement and opened his eyes. They immediately widened at the sight of her working herself into position.
"May -" his voice was husky and rough. "What are you - you don't have to -"
Mairead blinked up at him. "Please?" she asked in her sweetest voice.
She saw his throat bob up and down as he swallowed with effort. "Oh, Good Lord," he muttered, letting his head fall back on the pillow.
She took that as assent.
Remus's entire body jerked and he made a sound of helpless pleasure. Smiling triumphantly, Mairead continued on.
After a few minutes, Mairead glanced up at Remus's face. He was gasping for air, his chest heaving up and down. He had released the bed post and was instead grabbing a handful of his own hair.
He was the sexiest thing she had ever seen in her entire life.
She hummed happily to herself and continued. Mairead judged that he was only two or three strokes from completion when he suddenly lunged for her, seized her by the arms, and hauled her to the top of the bed.
Mairead squeaked in surprise as she found her lips - presently otherwise occupied - crushed against his. He kissed her frantically, both hands in her hair, but not for long. They cupped her face, slid down to palm her breasts, roamed around her back, skated down her spine, lifted her shirt and - she made another surprised sound - grasped her bottom.
Breaking the kiss at last, Remus wrapped one arm firmly around her waist and, with the other, pulled himself backwards until his back was resting against the headboard, taking Mairead along with him.
"I don't think I want to hear how you got so good at that," Remus said in a low growl. He grasped Mairead's thighs then and guided her to straddle his hips.
Mairead blinked at him in surprise at this sudden turn of events. Remus placed his hands on her hips, his eyes burning into hers.
"Go on," he murmured, his voice low and gravelly.
All of Mairead's bravado from a few moments before had vanished. "I -" she said uncertainly. "I don't know how to... like this," she admitted in a tiny voice.
"Would you like to learn?" asked Remus.
Mairead took a moment to weigh her options. On the one hand, she had been greatly enjoying the feeling of accomplishment that came from doing something she knew she was good at. But on the other, she could hardly get any better if she never tried anything new.
And she had an O.W.L. in Defense Against the Dark Arts to show for Remus's teaching skills.
Her mind made up, Mairead nodded.
"You can change your mind at any time," Remus reminded her.
"Okay," she breathed.
He nodded, then said, "Wait just a moment." He held her in place on his lap with one hand while he leaned to the side, reaching for his wand on the nightstand. He straightened, brushed her shirt aside, and touched the tip of his wand to her lower abdomen. "May I?" he asked before continuing.
Mairead nodded, impatient to get started now that she had come to a decision.
Remus recited the incantation, placed his wand back on his nightstand, then grasped her firmly by the hips and showed her what to do.
Mairead lost track of time, lost track of everything but Remus. When eventually he slumped against the headboard, utterly spent, Mairead slumped against him. Her ear was pressed against his chest, and she could hear his heart beating wildly, pumping endorphins through his body.
Eventually Mairead raised her head and regarded Remus self-consciously. "Did I do okay?" she asked timidly, half-afraid of the answer.
Remus raised his eyebrows. "Are you serious?" he asked. Mairead looked away, feeling nervous and embarrassed. Remus clicked his tongue and smoothed his hand across her face, which was covered in a thin film of sweat. "You did spectacularly," he said sincerely. "That was astounding."
Mairead stared him down, intently trying to detect a lie. When she was satisfied that he genuinely meant to praise her, she settled her head back against his chest.
"May I ask you a question?" she asked after a long, contemplative silence.
"Of course," said Remus, stroking a hand tenderly down her back.
"What is that spell you keep using?" she asked. "The one with the yellow light?"
Remus pulled back and looked at her in surprise. "You don't know the Contraceptive Charm?" he asked. His voice was mild but he was looking at her in concern.
Mairead closed her eyes in embarrassment. "Oh," she said quietly. "That makes sense."
Remus was frowning at her now. "What did you and Roger use?" he asked slowly. "A potion?"
Mairead pulled her bottom lip into her mouth. "Erm... no..." she said cagily. She couldn't look Remus in the eye, but could easily imagine the displeasure he must have been showing at that moment.
Mercifully, he decided to let it go. "I'll show you how to perform it on yourself tomorrow night," he said. "Every witch should know how to perform a Contraceptive Charm. You should never surrender your power and free agency to your partner by leaving it up to them whether you get pregnant or not. It's your body. You get to decide what happens to it."
Mairead smiled to herself. So he is a feminist.
Her smile widened at the thought that she had already received an invitation to join him the following night.
Author's Note: What did you think? Too much sex? (I certainly hope not, because there's still more to come, lol.) Thank you for reading!
Also, the opening line from the book Remus lent Mairead was from Rebecca, by Daphne du Maurier.
Song for this chapter: "New Religion," by The Heydaze (Remus)