Note: This was a doosy of a chapter to write. Sorry it took so long coming back, hoping the next one is out sooner than this.
Chapter 15 (Broken Arrow)
Shuichi rubs a hand over his face as he leans back in the sand, thankful for the softer landing. He studies his sister a moment, dressed in a fresh Suna Shinobi uniform, with her clean dark hair pulled back into a messy ponytail and shorter strands framing her face, but her eyes look tired and the rest of her is ragged. He lets out a small huff of air and shifts, moving his feet back under him and keeping low as he charges, her attention fully on their mother as he rushes her. He almost feels bad when his shoulder connects to her waist harder than he really intended but loses any sympathy when he feels a throb from his jaw. He pushes his chakra into her body immobilizing her before she can even squirm as he comes to full height. With his sister on his shoulder he quickly makes his way inside, kicking the door open before unceremoniously throwing her on the couch. As soon as he's charka is disconnected, her own is racing up her body, removing and undoing his paralyzing technique as she glares at him, still slumped on the couch but not for much longer.
Shuichi isn't impressed at her figuring out how to cancel his technique so quickly, he's still too pissed to be.
"So, what the fuck did ya' punch me for?" He asks dryly as Akira sluggishly sits up and glares angrily at him.
Shuichi blinks, taken aback by the amount of rage that is in his sister's eyes. Had she ever looked at him like that before? He checks her over again and notices the bandages around her throat, the bruise-colored bags under her eyes. His jaw throbs again but all he can feel now is concern for his sister, who looks pissed and battered. He can see ghosts in her eyes behind the burning rage.
Shuichi shifts his brow wrinkling in worry as he steps back, his calves hitting the small living room table as he stares back at Akira.
"What the fuck happened?" He asks softly and sees something flash in Akira's eyes, can see them soften for a moment.
And then the front door flies open, and her eyes harden again.
Shuichi turns to see their mother, her long violet hair flaring behind her, loose from the usual high ponytail she kept it up in, as she turns toward the living room. Her bright lavender eyes flash angrily as she stares down her daughter. Shuichi gulps knowing that look from his mother's eyes and it hits him just how much Akira resembles their mother. He holds out his hands but before he can even attempt to calm the situation their mother is already moving.
Kana slams the front door shut, never taking her eyes off her daughter. "Akira! I don't care if he is your brother, you don't punch a Konoha Shinobi in the streets of Suna! We have barely become allies!" She hisses before rolling her eyes and strolling angrily in front of a paralyzed Akira. "What in the world made you think that was ok? We're not fully registered as Suna citizens let alone as shinobis! One wrong move and that's it for our permits!" Kana shook her head annoyed and unaware of her son's attempts of trying to speak over her rant and her daughter's unnerving glare. "Just wait two more months, and then you two can punch the hell out of each other for Kami's sake…" Kana's voice trails off as she lifts her eyes to her daughter's eyes and blinks. "Ok what the hell did I do to deserve that look?" She asks angrily as she turns to her son who looks at her with apologetic eyes and gritted teeth.
Shuichi lets out a sigh and spreads his hands. "Well mom-."
His chance to explain is passed over in seconds as Kana rounds back toward her daughter, "Akira you will answer-."
"I don't think that'll help anything ma-." Shuichi cringes as Akira's eyes somehow narrow even further and she clenches her jaw tighter.
"What?" Kana asks her own eyes blazing as she looks at Shuichi who gulps.
"Don't you see how pissed she is?" Kana snorts.
"Of course I do, and that's the issue-."
"Well mom I don't think-."
"-and her being pissed off doesn't mean she should be looking at me like that."
"-you being pissed at her will make matters better."
They both pause at the gentle click of the door shutting and blink at each other. Shuichi shuffles to the side to let his mother glance past him as he turns, and even Akira looks confused at who could have entered the house at this moment.
Temari is glaring at the family in the living room as Gaara and Kankuro stand stoically at her sides. They had silently agreed to follow inside after watching the disaster outside. The three of them concerned over the small family they had grown attached too, and frankly they wanted answers for what was going on.
Kana and Shuichi scan over the trio briefly before both sigh in realization and Akira simply huffs on the couch. Half annoyed that her friends came, and half pleased. At least she would have an audience to the bullshit that was surely going to happen now. Shuichi lets out a half laugh after his sigh as he gives a lazy grin to the Sand Siblings.
"Of course, it's you three." He jokes as Kana lets out a low growl and shuffles over to the trio as Temari raises her chin to the violet haired woman. Akira watches in vague amusement as Kana tries to persuade the trio to leave only to have all three of them dig in their heels as Temari loudly explains they are not leaving, and she can deal with them being there. The two women, now arguing, were both stubborn and strong-willed, hardly ever admitted when they were wrong, so when disagreements came up it often resulted in more arguing than the situation called for. Akira sighs heavily, unsure if it is out of amusement or begrudging acknowledgement, as Shuichi takes the opportunity of the Sand Siblings fighting with his immoveable mother and slides down quietly to sit on the coffee table. He gently reaches out prodding Akira's knee as she looks at him in surprise and suspicion as he undoes his jutsu and catches her eye.
"So, will you please tell me what's going on? Why are you so pissed?" He asks quietly and before Akira could even speak the argument between the Sand Siblings and their mother intensifies as Kana tries to shove the siblings out of her house, only to have Temari use her fan as a shield and to shove back, with her brothers backing her up. Temari is swearing profanities in protest as Kana grits her teeth and Gaara and Kankuro are both blanching and struggling to help their sister. Shuichi lets out 'pfft' of air at the amusing scene before composing himself and turning back to his sister who watches in bewilderment at the scene.
"Do you want them to stay? I dunno what you're mad at but if you want them to stay, they can." He smiles softly at his sister who looks at him with pure surprise now. Realization hits her as she looks at her gentle brother who, despite all the rage and anger she has shown, still wants her comfortable before trying to pry or prod her. She feels some of the rage slide away slightly and she finds herself wanting to talk to her brother, wanting his help, because despite everything, he was still her older brother who cried with her when she went through a glass door.
She gulps and looks at him and hesitantly opens her mouth again.
Only to clamp it shut as Kana plops down next to her daughter.
The violet-haired woman sighs as she looks at where Temari sits on her kitchen table, legs cross and smug as she holds her chin high while her brothers are slumped over exhausted behind her. She had only partially heard her son's questions to Akira and now looks at her kids expectantly.
"Yeah so why are you glaring at us like that?" She asks gesturing to the look that once again decorated Akira's face. Shuichi almost wants to scream at the lack of headway he is making due to the interruptions. At least it's not all in vain as it seems most of Akira's anger is at their mother.
For whatever reason.
He lets out a sigh through his nose. "Mom maybe-?"
"I should get them to leave?" She asks gesturing to the Sand Siblings, who glare in response (or at least Temari does, as Gaara and Kankuro are still slumped over). Kana snorts before rolling her eyes. "Yeah already tried that."
Shuichi would normally find the banter amusing and endearing but only wants to shake some sense into his mother now. "No mom-." He starts only to be interrupted again, but this time by a different quieter voice.
Akira is looking down as she quietly asks, "How did Papa die?"
Shuichi blinks and almost sputters from the whiplash the situation has given him. "Huh?" He asks before shaking his head. "Akira you already know-."
"On mission!" Kana's voice is almost too loud, too desperate, as her hands flutter close to her own face, her eyes wide and surprised. Shuichi whips around to look at their mother, brows furrowed in confusion as he stared at the tell-tale signs that their mother was lying. "You know how he died, love. He was protecting us-."
"How much longer are you going to keep lying to me?" Akira's voice is hard and quiet, full of anger and her eyes were almost glassy, uncaring what her mother was saying as she looks at her brother. "Do you know how he die?" She asks, her eyes clearing a moment as though daring him to lie to her as Shuichi, for the first time in his life, feels terrified from sitting so close to his sister.
He fights the urge to shift away. "I know he was stabbed. A kunai threw the neck."
Akira stares hard at her brother a moment before shifting her eyes toward their mother.
"But it wasn't a kunai, was it?" She asks quietly as Kana flinches before her lavender eyes widen.
"You remember, don't you?" She asks as Akira's jaw tightens.
"Remember what?" Shuichi and Temari ask in unison as they glance at each other before turning back to the pair on the couch.
Akira's face is hard, her eyes full of rage and underneath it, a hurt that left Shuichi worried. He hadn't seen Akira on the verge of breaking down since the death of her teammate. His violet eyes shift toward their mother, who looked guilty, concerned, and overall shocked at the attitude of her daughter as she brings her hands up to her mouth.
"Akira-." She starts reaching for her after a heartbeat, only her daughter sharply moves up and away from her almost stumbling over the low coffee table but catches herself.
"Don't." She hisses, quiet, and low through gritted teeth. She glares a moment before turning away, her mind racing as she turns toward the kitchen. She keeps her eyes low, all too aware of the multitude of pairs watching her as she did.
Kana watches, as her daughter, who was usually bright, kind, understanding, so much like her father, turn her back and move away. Akira's face was contorted into something hard and full of anger, so foreign from her usual disposition, and Kana lets out a shaky breath.
"I made that deal to save your life. To save our lives." She breaths out desperate, her eyes finding Shuichi's bewildered gaze and she feels her heart constrict. If she doesn't explain properly then she'll lose them both. Too many ghosts and secrets have followed her, them, around long enough.
Akira watches as the glass is close to full, and freezes at her mother's next words, unfeeling of the cold water as it spills over the sides of the glass and cascades past her fingers.
"I didn't have a choice!"
Water was valuable in Suna, a luxury almost-.
"They were going to hurt you."
She needs to turn off the faucet, to move-.
"I did it to protect-."
Akira had felt rage, had felt the anger, and had felt nothing, in such a short amount of time, that now as she turns, the glass shattering in her hand and sending shards to scatter around the kitchen, as she feels the weight of eyes fall on her, she isn't sure what she is feeling.
But she knows what she is seeing.
And it's red.
"BULLSHIT!" She screeches, her chest heaving and her teeth clack as she strides back into the kitchen. Shuichi rises from his position by the table, stepping between his sister and mother, but Akira hardly notices as she snarls at her mother who stares up at her with wide wet eyes.
"If you wanted to protect us you wouldn't have taken us to that place! You had a choice! You choose to take us there-!"
"Akira-." Her mother's voice wavers as tears spill down her cheeks.
"You hurt us by letting them hurt us."
"Hey Akira-." Shuichi reaches for her, but she jerks away from him. If she stops now, she won't say what needs to be said.
"You are responsible for Father dying-."
"Akira!" Temari shouts jumping down from her position on the table as Gaara and Kankuro both rise to a stand. Akira doesn't turn around, she needs to get this off her chest, because it wasn't fair and she couldn't stop at this point even if she wanted.
"We were children, and you sent us to hell! And dad was the one who paid the price!" Akira snarls, and something shifts across her mother's face before she rises to a stand and looks down at her daughter.
Because while Akira might have majority of her features from her mother, she does not have her height, and Kana uses that to her full advantage.
"It doesn't matter what I say now does it? You seem to have all the answers." Kana rolls her eyes, wiping away the tears she had shed, as Akira blinks hard, almost flabbergasted as Shuichi whistles for attention.
"Ok let's take a break and explain to me what the fuck you guys are talking about!" He shouts as Akira gives him a confused look while Kana just looks on coldly.
"Besides, you still haven't answered if you want them here or not. And, uh, ya know, your hand." Shuichi winces and points down to where Akira's injured hand is hanging loosely to her side.
She could feel the warm liquid trickle down from the cuts on her palm and fingers, and now that she is looking at the injury, she could also feel a steady throb of pain coming from the appendage. Akira blinks at her brother a moment, still taken aback at her mother's shift in attitude and this whole turn of events when she feels someone touch her arm. She turns as gentle fingers close around her upper arm and her eyes meet concerned teal ones as Temari pulls on her arm.
"Let's get you cleaned up. Come on." Akira blinks numbly, full of surprise and slight concern as she allows the blonde girl to pull her into the kitchen.
"And while their doing that." Shuichi says, gesturing toward their mother's bedroom as Kana sighs and leaves to the other room with her son.
Akira doesn't watch as Temari plucks the glass shards out of her hand. She mutters that Gaara already took care of the glass, but Akira feels her stomach twist when she thinks of meeting any of their eyes for longer than a few seconds. She keeps her head low as Temari cleans her hand, pulls out the first aid kit and bandages her hand. She remembers the last time she got into an accident with glass, and she wonders if her hand will scar like her shoulder had.
"And done." Temari declares gently as she places the last of the tape on and stands up straight with her hands on her hips. She doesn't bother smiling as she looks at Akira, who hasn't looked up since being brought over to the sink. She watches a moment as Akira studies the bandages before working on putting away the kit.
"Can we talk outside please?" Akira's voice is soft and quiet as Temari closes the cabinet door, and nods once before heading toward the door, motioning for her brothers to follow. Kankuro rolls his eyes and shuffles lazily toward the door as Gaara pauses a moment looking back at Akira, who looks small and quiet in her own kitchen, before following suit.
Akira swallows, and follows the trio out of her house, making a point not to look in the direction of her brother and mother. She winces as she steps out into the bright sunlight and rubs at her temples. Guilt sits heavy in her chest and her head aches from the tumble of emotions she's been falling through. But then again, in the span of what seems like three days (she isn't entirely sure how long it's been at this point) she's fought against a tailed beast, lost her memories, regained some of her memories, and had the deal with all the emotional baggage of just those events, let alone the fallout of the fresh raw emotions the memories wrought. Akira sighs as she looks at the trio waiting for her and the guilt gets worse seeing the glares Gaara and Temari are shooting Kankuro who is trying to stand nonchalantly and failing at it. She trots down the steps and tries to dredge up any of the conviction she had when confronting her mother, to at least explain her out of character behavior.
She finds nothing up an empty sense of shame.
"I…" Akira glances at the three of them before looking down, her face feels hot, and she feels just awful all around. She swallows hard because she needs to explain though, even if she isn't sure how to do that. She rakes her good hand through her hair, "I-." She lets out a squeak instead as her wrist is grabbed and she is jerked forward.
Akira's body collides with Temari's who hugs her tight and breathes a sigh of relief in her ear.
"I am so glad you're ok." She says and Akira blinks, feeling fresh tears prickle in her eyes as she sees the soft faces of the boys behind Temari. "I mean, as ok one can be after fighting Shukaku and with everything else going on." She lets out a soft bark of a laugh before releasing Akira and giving her a bright and sunny grin.
Temari closes her eyes, and her face settles back into her usual hard and determined look as she takes a breath. "Ok now look," Her hands settle on Akira's upper arms giving a gentle but firm squeeze as Akira looks into her teal eyes. "I don't understand what's going on. I won't begin to act like I do but I do know that whatever is going on… I'm on your side." Akira's eyes scan her face looking for any doubt and she feels some tears trail down her cheeks when she finds none. "If you don't want us around that's fine, but no matter what happened in your past, it's in the past. I'll be here no matter what." Akira blinks trying to stop the now steady stream of tears from spilling down her cheeks as she nods and bites her lip.
She had known that her behavior up to this point was almost cruel in how she pushed everyone away. She knew that she wasn't making the right choices, and hadn't realized just how worried she was that the fallout of her mistakes would be losing her friends. But to hear them side with her, to see the honesty in Temari's face was more than overwhelming.
She hadn't lost them, and she wasn't going to lose them that easily.
"I… I appreciate that and… I-I'm s-sorry." She chokes out as Temari gives her biceps a squeeze once more.
"Yeah, what exactly was that?" Kankuro asks pointing a finger toward the house as Akira wipes at her face and Temari drops a hand to turn to look at her brother in dissatisfaction.
"I uh… long story short it's just family drama. But I'm sorry you had to see all that." She says and she isn't proud. If she's honest with herself even she doesn't want to go back inside. She gently steps just out of Temari's reach, feeling her face warm with her lack of response as she tries to meet their eyes.
She regrets it once she makes eye contact with Gaara, whose expression is almost unreadable.
Almost.
"It was rather unexpected of you." Gaara says softly and Akira doesn't look at him again and instead lets her head bob in agreement.
Akira is still shaken at the interaction she just had with Temari if she's honest. The blonde had always been caring toward her and had sat with her through memories that came and even tried to pry a few out of her. Akira takes a shuddering breath as the realization that someone had brought up her physical welfare and had cared. She hadn't been expecting the utter acceptance after her outburst but here they were.
But then again, she really should have expected this based on the memories she had regained; once Temari considered someone family, she treated them with an acceptance and loyalty that could rival her devotion to her village.
Her friendship with Gaara had a foundation of quiet, respectful understanding.
And Kankuro was… Kankuro.
"Ok. Ok." She says rubbing her face and takes a breath before looking at the three of them again. "I… I really don't know what's going to happen from here on out. It's a lot… and I…." She pauses unsure of how to tell them. She glances from Temari to Gaara to Kankuro, because if she's honest, she doesn't mind Temari staying due to her having been around for the previous fights Akira and her mother have had.
But her gut sinks down to her feet when she thinks of Kankuro and Gaara seeing more of the shit show that is occurring.
"Ya know what? I'm gonna call it for the day." Kankuro says suddenly striding up and plopping a hand down on Akira's head. She squirms away with a grunt of annoyance as he ruffles her hair and chuckles at her discomfort. "Do what you gotta do, just stop making us all concerned."
"I'm not doing it on purpose." She pouts shoving his head away and sticking her tongue out at him. He reciprocates the action as he turns away and stops mid-step when she calls out. "Thanks again Kankuro."
He doesn't turn around, instead just turns his head enough to yell over his shoulder. "Yeah, don't mention it!" He waves an arm lazily as he strides away and secretly hopes his siblings can help her out. Akira allows herself a small smile at his back before the guilt drowns her again.
Temari and Gaara exchange surprised looks at the interactions between Kankuro and Akira. Last they knew the two had hated each other, and then just this morning they had gone on a crazy ass journey around the village. They exchanged mutual shrugs before looking at Akira who seemed a little lighter after the interaction.
"So, uh, met you inside?" Temari asks, trying to keep up with the change of tone in the situation as Akira takes a deep breath and gives her a nod.
"Yeah I'll be in soon, just…" She points at Gaara who nods at Temari in quiet agreement as Temari gives her arm another squeeze and slips past toward the house.
Gaara catches her still wide soft brown eyes as she turns toward him, and he steps forward careful to keep an arm's length distance between them. "Are you doing better?" He asks softly as Akira scans him a minute and looks away sighing.
"Honestly? I'm still confused as shit, but I'm not… clueless?" She says after a beat of trying to find a better word and failing. At this point she feels like she overreacted to shoving everyone away, but she also knows that she really doesn't want to concern anyone more than she should. Her fingers twitch at her sides as she resists the urge to rub her face as she studies Gaara's expression. She realizes that his face is hard to read, had it always been that hard to read?-
Her thoughts stop abruptly when his face softens unexpectantly, and he gives her an almost-there smile. "I'm glad you're better." He says softly and seems to consider something before shifting away from Akira. "I'll be going-."
"Wait-." Akira interrupts and stops unsure of what to say but knowing she couldn't just let him leave after seeing it. The hurt he was trying to hide as his face fell back into the standard cold aloof expression. She watches as his brow furrows in confusion, and she swallows. "I never said I wanted you to leave. But I… I want to explain why I don't want you here right now." She says softly as Gaara shifts toward her again, waiting, his face still hard to read as Akira tries to clear her suddenly dry throat.
"Gaara, I remember a bit more about us and I remember us being friends. Best friends, actually, and I am so sorry for the way I have treated you. You helped me in the cave, and you stood by my side. You and Temari came out looking for me once you realized I left the hospital room. I did need you to keep your distance while I worked to remember because everything hurt." She stops a moment looking away from him ever-cold mint eyes, guilt eating at her because Gaara had so many people push him away. He had opened up to her, and she had shoved him away in the end just like so many others had done. She really didn't deserve-.
"You're doing it again." He says it so gently that Akira looks up surprised as he stares at her softly and with concern in those lovely eyes. He takes a half step forward and seems to catch himself as he looks at her almost pleading. "Akira you helped me restrain Shukaku, and had your memory wiped because of it. You had every right to ask for space-."
"I could have asked in a nicer way." Akira snaps her mouth shut from her sudden retort and she can feel heat rising in her cheeks. She hadn't meant to let it slip and the look on Gaara's face at her immediate retort was almost comical.
"…That may be, but you still had a right to do what made you comfortable." He finishes and once again that almost-smile is on his face and his eyes are alight with a soft joy.
"Ok… but Gaara I just… what I want is for us to stay friends. I'm not asking you to leave me alone, just… if you could wait while I figured things out-?" Akira winces from her word choice as Gaara blinks at her.
"Is that a question?"
"…Yes?" she says after a quick glance away from him as he closes his eyes and resists the urge to give a dry laugh at how different this is.
Akira used to be so confident, blunt, and still managed to be polite despite how candid she was. Now she shifts, unsure and nervous, but still rather blunt and it honestly calms Gaara. It made him realize that pushing her out of his life wouldn't matter. Because once Akira had all her memories, once she knew who she was again, she would only come barging back into his life with a vengeance. He could almost hear her soft questions and never-ending understanding at his own wonderment of what this relationship could provide besides pain and heartache. He could also hear her scoff and her own callouts on how idiotic that logic was. In his desperation with his fighting with Shukaku he had made a safe area in the form of her room. Obviously, she brought him a sense of comfort and acceptance he only felt from his family and those close to him. And that included her.
He opens his eyes and gives her a once over.
"I promised you we would stay friends. I'll wait while you find out what you need to." He says as Akira relaxes almost instantly and breathes a sigh of relief.
"Thank you Gaara, I just… there are somethings I don't want to share, and I don't want you to see me like that-." She stops almost pained and Gaara takes another half step forward.
"Take all the time you need, and when you're ready, I hope you will come have tea with me." He says as Akira eyes widen taken aback and the familiar memory of her inviting him over to her house, the first time they met, rises out of her subconscious. He does something then that surprises her, and Akira is left a bit more stunned than when Temari had abruptly pulled her into a hug.
Gaara smiles at her. There isn't any teeth, and it's small, but it reaches his lovely mint eyes and brightens his face.
Akira blinks once before she lets out a little laugh and grins at him. Bright and happy and toothy and Gaara is pleased to see that his friend is thankfully doing so much better. Even if she wasn't the same, they would be fine, and he is more than sure of that now. Because this was his Akira, and he would accept any form that followed today. Because as long as she could smile at him like that despite everything that happened, they would be fine.
"Thank you again Gaara, for… everything." She gives him an exasperated wave of her hands, but the smile is still on her face and Gaara simply nods.
He leaves in his signature swirl of sand and takes a breath once he gets back into his family's dining room. Now that he knew without a doubt that everything would be fine concerning Akira, he turns down the hall and nods to himself.
It is time he got to work.
Akira watches the swirl of sand settle before taking a breath and nods to herself.
Now it was time for the truth.
Shuichi leaves his mother's room with a sigh and rakes a hand through his lavender hair. He had failed in getting her to talk to him in about… really anything. Every time he had asked about what Akira was talking about, about the details of their father's death, Kana would just shift, glare at him, and tell him the same thing over and over again.
"Go ask your sister since she has all the answers."
Shuichi fights the urge to beat his head against the doorframe until he hears a rattle of dishes from the kitchen. He shuffles forward tentatively and relaxes when he spies a blonde head of hair moving around the kitchen.
"Do you need any help?" He asks, hoping he could do something useful and frowns to himself as Temari doesn't bother to turn as she shakes her head.
"No, I got it taken care of here." Silence falls between them as Shuichi plops down in a chair and stares forlornly at his mother's bedroom door.
"I take it she's not budging?" Temari asks, her voice almost a hush as she finishes the tea.
"I haven't seen her like that in a long time. Our father knew what to do when she got like that but…" Shuichi stops altogether as the front door opens and Akira shuts it softly nodding to her brother and Temari as she pads into the kitchen.
"Ya doing better?" Shuichi asks sliding his foot forward to bump into Akira's who pushes hers back into his and shrugs.
"I suppose. Thanks for making tea." She gives Temari a small smile as Shuichi relaxes a little at his sister's calmer demeanor.
A part of him (a big part of him) had been hesitant when hearing her befriend some of the strongest, most sadistic ninjas to ever come out of Suna, but he had trusted his sister in both her judgement and sense of self-preservation. Now he was glad he had since it seemed like their conversation had calmed Akira and had also brought her back to some sensibility.
Now if only they could convince their mother-.
His line of thought stops when their mother emerges from her bedroom, dressed in standard shinobi pants, a sleeveless shinobi shirt with her tan Suna vest over top. Her headband was tied around her forehead and her long hair is pulled back into a high ponytail.
"I made a promise to your father." Kana starts, slamming the thick folder containing many documents onto the table. "I am going to honor that promise despite what some of you might think." Her piercing gaze makes Akira's gut flip with guilt as she shifts uncomfortably but stares back, nonetheless.
She had been the one to throw the first punch (quite literally), and while guilt sat heavy in her stomach, she wouldn't back down.
Kana's eyes snap away from her daughter's as she spreads some of the documents around the table while Temari pours out the tea and places the cups onto a tray. Shuichi and Akira follow her out, exchanging looks of surprise at her calm demeanor toward the dysfunctional family. Akira gives him a small almost unnoticeable shrug as they took their seats around the living room. They sit in silence a moment, Temari on the floor by the stairs, her back pressed against the bookcase, and her legs folded underneath her. Akira and Kana sit on opposite ends of the couch while Shuichi sits at the coffee tables, his elbows propped up on it and his long legs folded underneath him. Shuichi studies the gap left between them on the couch. Before Akira would normally lean toward the tall and lean woman, would unconsciously shift closer to their mother most days who usually generated a calm playful aura. But now she was leaning away, as though trying to get away from the icy front their mother was now sporting.
"As you kids know, I was raised by mercenaries, who traveled and offered their services to whoever had money, wherever we were at the time. It wasn't the whole truth. But it wasn't a full lie." Kana's jaw is clenched hard as she looks sharply at her daughter, who simply nods and sips at her tea.
"I mean it really depends on your definition of truth." Akira snaps back as she sets her tea down and Shuichi shoots a panicked glance at Temari who watches with a calm expression.
At least someone felt comfortable here.
"Once there was a tribe." Kana says after a beat of silence and biting her own tongue. "But before that there was a caravan. It would travel between the different capitals of the lands and trade a variety of things. Various odd and ends they got from other villages, services, a few products they made, business was good for them. They usually stayed away from the Hidden Villages due to their lack of fighting numbers, despite the enormity of the caravan."
"Wouldn't it be hard to travel in that form? Smaller numbers would be easier." Shuichi asks as Kana's eyes narrow. He gulps and ducks his head sheepishly as Kana sighs.
"Yes, and it had a main location for that purpose. It was somewhere for them to stop during the off seasons and to restock on goods. It also served as a place for those who wished to live a sedentary life but wanted to remain close to the caravan." She explains and points to a small island off the coast of The Land of Fire. "The main location was a village called Uzushio that existed in peace and had an alliance with the major villages in the Land of Fire. They helped during the wars and were an active member in helping get Konoha to where it is today." Kana absentmindedly draws a swirl on her map over the island she pointed at. Akira blinks at the familiar squiggle and feels her gut flip from looking at it. She glances away and winces at the pain from her hand. She takes a wavering breath in as she works to loosen her grip on her mug as Kana continues her explanation.
"Many people from the caravan originated from Uzushio and vice versa, but not all. A majority but not everyone had Uzu blood in them. After Uzushio was destroyed, many of those people from the village came to the caravan."
Akira feels a tug in the back of her mind, something she learned at a young age but couldn't quite recall, "Destroyed?"
Temari sits up a little shifting against the bookcase to pull her knees up to her chest as she clears her throat. "They specialized in fuinjutsu and were destroyed for it. Nations where afraid of their powers thinking that they would be able to undo a seal on a jinchuriki. So, to prevent them from doing so, they were invaded and their village all but burned to ashes."
Kana nods at Temari. "Someone knows their history. I was a baby when it happened. But before then during times of war and such things the caravan would stay in Uzushio but when Uzushio fell many of the shinobi fell with them. Those that escaped scattered, and the portion I come from found a lake in the middle of the Land of Fire and stayed there. My parents went on odd jobs here and there trying to help us get by before they were attacked. My grandma raised me; she was the medicine woman for the encampment."
"That's why she gave me candy." Akira mutters more to herself as Kana pauses and looking at her daughter knowingly, nods in agreement.
"Yes. The few shinobi that stayed with us urged us to make our children learn the seals and how to fight. To pass it on in hopes that one day Uzushio would be rebuilt. My parents, I don't think lived there. But my grandma urged me to learn it. She also taught me the different herbs and medical techniques she knew and urged me to be loyal to what was the start of the tribe. And I was." Kana sighs as she rubs her face.
A part of her, a large part of her, feels uncomfortable sharing this information. Like picking at a scabbed over wound, either it would get infected, or it would scar. The outcome was unfavorable either way and she had only told one other person about her life, about the circumstances she hailed from.
And it was because of that promise to him, to Rei, that she was sitting here now.
"I was raised to trust the tribe, to avoid living in the villages since it was never clear to those who fled who had helped in destroying Uzushio. Everyone was so spiteful of any newcomers and would often harshly judge those from other Hidden Villages due to this. Yes, many claimed it was Iwa, others claimed Konoha betrayed the alliance, but no one knew for sure. I was allowed to leave on missions, to travel outside of the tribe. Originally it was planned for me to take my grandmothers place as the medicine woman, but my skill as a fighter was superior." Kana pauses a moment taking a sip of her tea before looking at Shuichi and smiles for the first time since starting her explanation.
"I got pregnant with Shuichi shortly after." Shuichi jerks up a bit at that, exchanging a surprised glance with Akira who gave him a matching expression. Their mother had never really brought up Shuichi's biological father, stating she had barely known him, and that for all intents and purposes Rei was his father.
"I met Shuichi's father when I was tasked with working with a satellite village, just a small one on the border and he was really nice, but I didn't love him." Kana says simply, with a shrug as Shuichi sputters with the information. "I didn't realize that until later, but he gave me an out from the village and your brother."
"He died though, didn't he?" Shuichi asks trying to make sense of what he had known previously and what his mother was saying now. Kana's lips pinch tighter together before she nods.
"We were going to move to Konoha together. He made me realize I didn't have to be mistrustful of everyone. That I liked choosing my own path. I never wanted to be a medicine woman and I was fine accepting the position if that was what the tribe wanted. See I knew the tribe wouldn't like him, didn't like him, but I was fine if I got my freedom. When they found out I was pregnant, that I wasn't shackled to them anymore, they made a choice." Kana takes a deep breath through her nose, trying to smell the bitter tea Temari had given her, and trying to ignore the feelings remembering her old flame's death brought up.
The poor man had been slaughtered; the scent of blood so thick she could taste it. And even now, years later, sitting here in her living room, she swears it coats her tongue.
"I was going to work as a Shinobi and he was going to open a small shop. I found out from his neighbors that he was killed in a scrimmage. But I always suspected that the tribe had something to do with it. Especially after I found out exactly, how, he was killed. So, I left for Konoha anyway. And I had you." She smiles at Shuichi who gives a small smile back and she fights back the wave of guilt. She reasons they already knew that the tribe had been full of monsters, there was no need to explain exactly what had been done to Shuichi's father.
There were some things better left unsaid.
"I tried, I really did, to take care of you by myself, but I had to get help when it came to leaving on missions. I didn't want to trust, couldn't trust, anyone in the village because it was hard to unlearn what had been engrained into me, and I had just lost the trust I had in the tribe. But I thought my grandmother would sit with you while I was gone. That she would be different and keep you safe. The tribe moved closer to Konoha because of it. They told me it was to keep an eye on the village that betrayed them. I should have known better." Akira bristles at that but says nothing as she looks at Shuichi's reeling expression. It was one thing to have your memory wipe and suddenly come back with more questions than answers being the focus of some of them.
It was another to learn that one's life could have been vastly different just due to the decision of a handful of individuals. If the tribe hadn't killed his father, Akira might not have been born, but at least Shuichi would have gotten the chance to know his biological father.
Kana takes another drink of her tea before shifting some more papers around. "We lived in Konoha for about two years before I met Rei. He had grown up there all his life and we didn't get along at first. He seemed way too nice and I didn't trust it. He also didn't mind that I had a son with someone else. But once on mission together, he took a kunai for me. He didn't need to do it, he just did. I tried to scold him that I could handle myself, but he just smiled and told me that I had a son that I had to get back home too." Kana pauses a moment at the unexpected hard tug on her heart and feels her throat tighten. She takes another gulp of tea, trying to keep from crying as she remembers her husband.
Temari shoots Akira a look from across the room and gives her a knowing smile as Akira scowls at her. Her eyes narrow as Temari shrugs a single shoulder and drinks from her glass. But not before Shuichi raises his brows at the silent exchange and Akira waves away his question. They had more pressing matters to get to besides how her first meeting with Gaara had gone in a similar matter.
She doesn't have time to think of the shocked expression on the boy's face, or how the sand had felt like stone under her hand. Akira rubs her hands together trying to get rid of the distant but distinct feeling.
Kana leans forward, rubbing her brow, her head was starting to hurt from the painful memories that were being dragged up.
"See I never expected to fall for him, but he just got along with Shuichi so well and he was an honest good man. After Shuichi's father I never thought I would find someone else. I felt like I was betraying him for the longest time, but Rei never pushed. Just was there for anything we needed. Finally, I threw caution to the wind, and he met Grandmother who loved him as well. It was then that we decided to have you." She smiles at Akira who blinks at her.
"Ok and?" She snips, as Kana jolts like Akira struck her. Shuichi glances sharply at his sister who just gestures like she wants Kana to continue with her point.
A mass parade of emotion crosses their mother's face, pain, surprise, regret, guilt, before settling on annoyance as she slams her cup down and huffs.
"Yeah we had you. Your father adored you, and Shuichi, and was a better parent that I could have ever hoped to be. Having a baby is stressful, it's hard, but he took it in stride. But we both had jobs as Shinobi at the end of the day. Your father was never really comfortable letting anyone else watch you. But your great grandmother kept Shuichi alive and well so… we trusted her. I hadn't known at the time. Or maybe," Kana pauses and takes a sharp intake of breath. "Maybe I didn't want to believe it."
"A…Akira," Shuichi's voice is barely a whisper and while Akira tilts her head toward her brother, she doesn't tear her expectant gaze away from their mother.
Because she's not going to miss the moment her mother admits to fucking up their lives, but she isn't expecting the next words from her brother.
"I knew about the tribe. Have known…" He whispers shame rising up quickly from in his gut and he doesn't lift his head from where he gazes at the table studying the wood grain. The room goes from quiet to silent as the breath in the people around him stills a moment, only to be broken by the thunderous squeak of surprise from his mother.
"I thought you repressed those memories." She rushes to say as Shuichi flinches.
"I-I remember some. Other pieces are hazy but-." He stops as Akira quickly, quietly rises from the couch, and he turns toward his sister reaching out.
Akira snaps her hand away and fresh rage, betrayal, and hurt are covering her face as she spits. "Don't."
"Akira please, please let me explain." He pleads as Akira backs away from him, pointing a finger at him accusingly as her stomach twists.
"If you don't stay over there, I will end your shit." She blinks rapidly, her eyes wetting and her face grower redder by the second. Her voice is strained with thinly controlled emotion as Kana presses her face in her hands.
"So you're here getting pissed at me when I'm not the only one who lied-." Kana starts only to be cut off by the sharp clink of glass on glass as Temari firmly sets her teacup down in its saucer.
"Is this really the time?" She hisses at Kana who flinches and stops her verbal attack as the two siblings square off. Akira, ever inching toward the door, as Shuichi stills but continues reaching out, searching for understanding from her.
"Gram took us up when Pa and Ma couldn't watch us. She would have them train me. I wasn't with the academy yet and Pa only taught me the basics after I decided I wanted to try the academy. They trained me as Gram took care of you. I should have realized from your scars honestly. They push me so hard I almost wanted to stop being a ninja." Shuichi stops looking pained at the memories as Akira glares at him, still standing with her fists clenched at her sides. "I don't remember a lot anymore, but I do know I got a lot of my scars from them. They… the punishments for children there were brutal, and we weren't coddled." Shuichi licks his lips and shakes his head softly. "I didn't know they sealed your memories, I-."
"They didn't." Akira hisses, but before Shuichi can ask, as Temari's brow furrows in confusion, Akira takes a step forward and growls. "Why didn't you talk to me about what happened."
It's not a question. It's an accusation.
There's a beat, a moment as Akira lets out an angry and deranged laugh as silence answers her.
"Papa died, Ma went catatonic, Grandmother died, and while I was fucking reeling, you, my brother," Akira, who had been taking steps with each phrase, steps up to Shuichi and jabs at his chest with her finger as she punches the last phrase into his heart.
"You left me to go get your cock wet."
The statement hangs in the air, a death sentence Shuichi can't get out of as he takes in a shuddering breath.
Akira watches as anger, grief and hurt flash across her brother's face. For a moment she thinks he's going to snap back, to attack her as hard back. But for all her anger, for all her rage, Shuichi takes his breath, and looks at her softly, mournfully and with regret.
Akira blinks, taken aback as he swallows his own anger, and takes away some of her own as well.
"You don't remember and that's fine, you don't know what your talking about and what you do know does warrant this." He voice is soft as he hold his arms out and looking at her pleading for understanding. "Akira I left so often to help out because mom wasn't there after dad died. You just said so yourself. Do you really think…?" He stops as she looks away, tears and shame burning her eyes as she feel shame wash over her.
"No." It's so quiet but in the silence of the room so loud and Shuichi moves them hugging Akira to his chest.
"I stopped going to the tribe when I got into the academy." His voice is thick with tears and sorrow, but he explains himself clearly and as rationally as he could. His check against the top of her head as she struggled to control her tears. "Gram stopped taking me because Papa found out. He thought maybe the scars I got where from training on my own, unsupervised. He didn't think about it until he saw my back…" Shuichi trails off before shaking his head pulling back as Akira looked up at him. "I don't think I ever saw him so mad. He screamed at Gram for taking me there, for taking us there when he realized she had to bring you along as well. He banned her from the house and when Ma tried to fight him-."
"You what? She what?" Akira asks interrupting as she whirls around toward her mother, who still had her face pressed into her hands.
"He kicked my grandmother out of our home, what was I supposed to do?"
"Defend us!" Akira roars, rage boiling in her face anew as she took a step toward the woman. "You were supposed to protect and defend us!"
"I didn't see the reason why he was so upset. I thought that was how everyone was brought up. I seriously thought that it was fine. He made me swear not to make you undergo the same training. I gave him a half-assed response, I admit. But Shuichi got top marks in the academy, and I knew it was from the tribe's training. I didn't think much of it." Kana replies sharply, face raised from her hands in exasperation as she waved them up and then toward Shuichi as she spoke. "I understand now that it was wrong."
"Oh, now you understand!" Akira quips as Shuichi halfheartedly reaches for her, only to have her jerk away from his grasp.
"I knew my grandmother wanted all of us back to with the tribe, but I didn't want to leave Rei. I had to accept that she couldn't be in our lives anymore because of him."
"Because he cared about us when you should have!" Akira yells and Shuichi looks at Temari pleadingly. She gives him a single shoulder shrug, unsure what he wanted her to do.
If Akira was going to be angry, she was going to be angry.
And from Temari's point of view she was justified in it.
"So what," Akira starts after a moment of silence while Kana simply glares at her. "Gram fucked off and then what happened?"
Shuichi takes a breath before sitting back down at the coffee table, a large part of him wants to throw up knowing what was coming next.
Kana frowns even harder and looks down at her hands. "I took time off to try and take care of you, you were only two. Shuichi had started academy and your father was gone on longer missions trying to make up as much money as he could. Fighting on the fronts and trying to keep what was left of the war at bay. I thought I could be a stay-at-home mother, but I missed traveling, I missed fighting. I got restless and Rei wasn't home. It was finally when you were five and Shuichi was almost graduated that I made the choice." She says softly as Shuichi sits up stiffly.
"A choice based on what?" Akira asks quietly, seething as she stares hard at her mother.
Kana looks at Shuichi a moment and their eyes meet as Akira looks between the two of them. Shuichi looks at Akira then as Kana takes a breath and sighs through her nose.
"I made a choice when the two of you cried over a little glass."
Shuichi all but throws himself to his feet, reeling as Akira feels her breath catch in her throat. "You don't mean-."
"When she fell through the glass door? Yes, I mean that."
Shuichi turns away from their mother in disbelief, his body trembling over the news. "She was only five, it was an accident-!"
"And she cried the entire time and so did you! I thought you both should have just… walked it off. Rei was so worried for the longest time over a damn cut, and it wasn't even that big-!"
"I have a fucking scar on my shoulder, I don't think you get a say in that." Akira hisses as Shuichi looks at her, and she sees her brother's face crumble with the knowledge. He knew his mother had to be the one to take Akira at that point, was sure Akira knew too based on her reaction.
But their mother's reasoning on why she did, he hadn't known. Hadn't been aware that showing empathy to his sister, that by hurting her that badly, would make them look weak in the eyes of their mother.
"Fuck Akira I am so sorry." He sobs face in his hands and voice cracking as Akira glares at her mother a moment before turning to her brother.
"We were kids." She speaks and although anger is laced in her words, her voice is soft. "You didn't know." She says, reaching out to her brother who clings to her hand as he crumples to his knees. He had wanted to protect his little sister, not be the reason she was sent through hell.
"I took you to the tribe after that. Shuichi was a full genin, assigned to a team and Rei was gone for a long time and we stayed with the tribe a few months. I would make sure we were back before anyone else was. I kept track of their mission dates and made sure we were able to leave quickly from both the tribe and the village. I just wanted you to learn something before you started academy. You were about six or so. They were harder on you than Shuichi given that both your parents were shinobi trained. They wanted you to be better…. Then I found out Rei would only be back one day before leaving for about three months again. And Shuichi was so caught up trying to make Chunin quickly that…we ended up staying a year."
Akira's jaw drops as Shuichi sucks in a breath in surprise. "A full year?" She asks as Shuichi chokes on a sob.
"We… we only went a couple times every few months." He says softly as Akira looks down at the floor. "And you let her stay in that hellhole for a full year?!" His voice hardening as he turns and glares at his mother. Kana sputters then as Akira turns away from her family, sick to her stomach as her mind reels.
"Everyone was gone! What was I supposed to do?"
"Stay home! Watch her! Do anything else!" Shuichi yells looking bewildered at their mother because those few months he had gone were hell and the full impact of what Akira had to endure was almost imaginable.
"Hey, you were gone too!" Kana points out as Shuichi rakes a hand over his face before raking it through his hair.
"Ok I admit I wasn't home. I admit I was gone a lot training with my team. But I was trying to make Chunin as fast as possible so dad could stay home more. So you and Akira weren't alone anymore. You know that." Shuichi's voice is hard as Kana looks away from her oldest child.
Akira's back is still to her family, her eyes closed, and her arms crossed as she winces through some of her memories. Of Shuichi teaching her new kunai tricks. Of sitting with Izumi in the shade watching her brother train when he was home. He had tried so hard to help, to be present and still make Chunin as quickly as possible.
"Don't worry Akira, I'll be home again soon. I'll be able to buy you all the treats you want then." She blinks away the memory, her heart softening to her brother again. But as she thought about the timeline her mother explained, the way her memories were trapped, something gnaws on the back of her mind.
Temari shifts forward again and makes eye contact with Kana.
"Akira is turning 16 this year, isn't she? She's not actually 15." She asks bluntly as Akira and Shuichi both whirl toward her, shock and realization both evident and as Kana nods, Akira fights the urge to just scream.
An entire year of her fucking life. Gone, locked away, with no intent of ever being found again. No way of her knowing that she wasn't her current age and everyone around her just let her believe it.
She lets out a ragged breath and clenches her jaw, teeth aching from the pressure.
"Tell me you aren't serious." Akira growls as Kana stares coolly at her daughter. "Tell me you aren't fucking serious." She shakes her head in disbelief, but her mother doesn't waver.
"We stayed as long as we could, and you ended up running away. I still don't know how you managed to get as far as you did with no shoes and being as injured as you were. It was pure luck that Rei found you, but he took one look at you and knew." Kana looks down and Akira can only think that it's fitting she looked somewhat ashamed of what she had done.
"He lectured me for hours about letting you go. He forced me to understand that as parents we are expected to do better by our kids, not put them through what we had to live through." Kana closes her eyes a moment before letting out a breath. "Your father was a kind and gentle man who hardly ever yelled, and he didn't that night. But the way he looked at me, he was so disappointed, so disheartened that I broke his trust and let you undergo that." She shook her head again and grimaced before continuing.
"Apparently, we had been under surveillance due to my leaving the village so often, especially with small children. The Third Hokage found out that many of the tribe were descendent from Uzushio and they worried about the seals. It doesn't matter what happened all those years ago because Konoha single handedly finished them off." She lets out a sharp laugh shaking her head.
"There was fighting as Rei and I walked back to the tribe, determined to stay away forever. He jumped in trying to talk and I took you to the tent. I tried to gather supplies, but I heard Gram shout and I left you alone. I watched as ANBU slit her throat. I watched them burn the tents, the tribe, our seals. I went running back to you, but you were gone. I found Rei later, one of the tribe's dagger embedded in his throat. The tribe killed my husband for taking me away, the ANBU destroyed my old home for the potential threat instead of welcoming us in and having us integrate and watch us closely. And you, I found you half conscious next to your father and I thought you were going to die." Kana stops a moment to release as shaky breath and wipe at her eyes. Her lavender eyes had started watering to start but fell halfway through the explanation. It had been a struggle to keep her voice intact and now she sobbed fully.
Because even after all these years, she could still see sweet Rei's face bloodied and bruised on the forest floor.
"That's not what happened." Akira breathes out as Kana blinks at her. Her daughter's eyes were glazed over as she let the memory wash over her.
"An ANBU grabbed me and moved me out in the open. In hopes that the crossfire would kill me, make it seem like an accident. For some reason he couldn't do it himself. Papa found me and tried to stitch me up after I got hit with a kunai. I was half out of it, but I saw an ANBU stab him from behind. And then lean down and stab through the front. I thought it was strange he hadn't used his sword." Akira says numbly as Kana shakes and sobs and Shuichi lets out another swear.
"The ANBU brought you back to Konoha, and you had Akira's memories sealed, what lead to that?" Temari asks after a beat of giving everyone a minute as Kana sighs and shoots her a look.
"I see why Akira wanted you to stay." She clears her throat and takes a breath. "The ANBU found me and Akira, I told the Third Hokage about the seals, promised him I would never speak of the incident and only barely got out of having those terrible silence seals placed on me. In exchange Akira's memories would be sealed she would start academy when she was supposed to under the impression it would be a year early. I didn't know they would take so many, the ones that had nothing to do with the tribe were supposed to be released slowly over time. The mercenaries lie was to make sure if any other memories slipped out, they wouldn't be too confusing."
"But Shuichi-." Temari starts, brow furrowing at the explanation as Shuichi interrupts.
"I didn't get out scot-free." He says, as all eyes fall on him. "An ANBU found me once when I was alone training before everything had happened. They asked if I specialized in seals, and it confused me at the time. I didn't know any particular ones, just the basics and it seemed to be good enough for them. They more or less implied that if I got too curious about them, that the next visit wouldn't be as friendly." Shuichi pauses before looking coldly at his mother.
"After dad died, they came to the house. Akira was asleep, and you were too out of it to realize I thought. They stood right in front of you and you didn't do anything. They said that if we visited the cove again, we wouldn't see the next dawn. I knew what they were talking about when they said that, but you never told me they sealed Akira's memories. After dad died you stopped doing much, I had to help raise Akira and I worked my ass off so we would have a roof over our heads." Shuichi pauses before looking at Akira who stood, hugging herself as tears came down her face. The memory of her dad dying still hurt but the memories of Shuichi cooking, of her mother's lifeless stare, of Izumi helping when she could. Akira could even remember when Izumi's little sister had been born not too long after, and how she got to play with her. Her heart aches with the thought of everything her brother had done, and her angry words to him sat heavily on her chest. He hadn't deserved that.
"You kept comparing everyone to your age and I missed a lot of your birthdays by accident. I still should have realized, I should have done something." He says, hands turning to fists at his sides as he looks away ashamed.
Akira doesn't say anything, she doesn't want to, and she isn't even sure what to say. Apologizing didn't feel like enough looking back on everything. All she can see is herself falling out of the glass door. Of the suitable warm house, they once lived in that soon became haunted and quiet from Rei's death. Of her father gentle and loving teaching, her how to throw little rubber kunais and helping her in her stances. Of how the red blood sprayed her after he wrapped her thigh. He had whispered that it would be fine that he loved her, as though he knew, and it wouldn't surprise her if he had. Then she remembers running away from the tribe. Of the hard and terrible trials. She had learned how to water walk or drown trying, they had ruined her sensory abilities by using that goddamn tank, and she remembers the other children. How they became dead eyed and lost, their bodies more scars and broken pieces than skin and bones.
She remembers her nightmares of that place and how Shuichi would wake up with her screaming, come rushing into the room to check on her. She remembers how he cried with her, how they played together after, how his violet eyes sparkled and how happy they were. Akira feels a lump form in her throat because this was her brother. The one who would make her smell his armpits but also pretended to have highly esteemed tea parties when she really like pink. He was the one to comb fingers in her hair to help her try and sleep when the insomnia got worse and would also throw pillows to wake her up. Through faults and mistakes this was her big brother and the man who was currently crying because of just awful he felt.
"Shuichi," She says, rougher than she means to and he stiffens and looks at her hesitantly. "You haven't lied to me, and you've always tried to protect me. It wasn't your fault." She says and her heart twists as a few tears fall from her brother's eyes.
She gives him a half-hearted smile and sighs. "Besides how could I stay mad at someone who cries over me like you do." Shuichi lets out a harsh bark of laughter at that and smiles at her with watery eyes. She looks away from the pure relief on his face because she doesn't deserve to be forgiven that easily, not when she was so nasty to him before.
"Aki?"
Akira's head snaps up blinking and a little disoriented over the old nickname as Shuichi looks her over.
"What happened on your mission?" He asks softly as Kana glances between her children. Half surprised at how forgiving they were to one another and the other by the shift in conversation. Her daughter tightens her grip on herself as she looks at Shuichi, eyes wavering and body shaking as she tries to figure out how to explain.
Temari clears her throat again and sits up, "Shukaku managed to catch Gaara off guard when Akira was injured right in front of him. She fought Shukaku and used a stabilizing seal on Gaara to force Shukaku back. It worked but not before he did something to her own seal."
Kana blinks as her jaw slowly drops and Shuichi freezes.
"I don't think I was supposed to remember everything. I was remembering not because the seal was failing, but because it was designed to." Akira says holding her head. She can see the Third Hokage trying very hard to hide any evidence of the tribe existing, because if they were gone their techniques would no longer exist. "He ordered them to place a seal on my memories, had them go through them time and time again to make sure they got everyone, to copy anything I learned. I mean think about it. Konoha has the Yamanaka clan that specialize in mind techniques, if they wanted to seal them away permanently, they would have. They wanted me to remember," She pauses again, her eyes going hazy as she tries to hear through the gaps of them replaying her memories. "I think… they wanted me to hate Konoha, and mom. So they would… have a reason." She breathes as Temari stares at her friend. Her throat is tight, and her eyes are wide because she can't find a fault in her logic. Konoha shinobis have always been insanely loyal to one another, had fought for honor of their village. She knew each village had secrets and a dark side she had lived in those shadows.
She just never imagined Konoha would be as dark.
Temari looks at her friend trying to catch her eye, but Akira's head is down slightly, her eyes are still hazy.
"After the Third placed the seal on your memories, he more or less stated we would never be accepted into Konoha. You were a citizen because you were born there and Shuichi because he went to the academy there. But I would never be given official papers." Kana explains and glances at her daughter before finishing. "That's why the move to Suna was easy."
"And you just never felt the need to explain more about dad?" Shuichi asked as Kana sighs.
"I don't know what you want from me? I am sorry I didn't realize sooner but I lost my tribe, I lost your father, I almost lost you both, I made a promise to Rei you kids would know him, and you do-."
"I didn't." Akira interrupts. "I didn't remember him." She huffs as Kana throws her hands up exasperated.
"And I didn't know he was sealed away! I thought you didn't talk about him because it was traumatic, I didn't know you didn't remember!" Akira once again turns away, moving to sit next to her brother on the floor. "You're so angry and I don't know-."
"DO YOU THINK I WANT TO BE THIS FUCKING ANGRY?!" Akira screams as she stares down her mother, hands pressing into the coffee table, and realizes dimly that her eyes are watering, she fights the urge to blink, refusing to back down from her stare. "DO YOU THINK I WANT TO BE SO FUCKING PISSED AT YOU AND SHUICHI?! I LOVE YOU BOTH SO MUCH BUT THIS IS DRIVING ME FUCKING Crazy." Her voice trails off as she lowers her gaze, her eyes too full of tears to properly see now as she struggled not to shed them. Her elbow buckle and she leans against the table and tries to explain why she feels so betrayed by the woman who raised her.
"Akira," Her mother's voice is soft as Shuichi's arm wraps around her shoulders. "I'm so sorry, I should have told you the truth once we moved. Once we got here. But I just thought you would remember and we would go from there. We're not registered citizens yet, and I didn't feel safe-."
"I don't feel safe right now." Akira croaks as she looks at Kana. "How am I supposed to trust you now?"
"You don't." Kana said, surprising everyone in the room as she gives them both a hard look. "You don't. I will work on getting your trust back, on being a better mother to you both. But for now, don't feel pressured to trust me. Just trust that I'm going to do better."
Akira looks at her mother in surprise before turning toward her brother who mirrors her expression. It wasn't a lot but it was something. It was a small promise of change of moving on.
Shuichi turns back toward Kana and mutters something to the woman but Akira can't make out what he said. She feels herself slipping again, turning off the world. Only this tine it's more sudden, and the lighting seems denser and darker and-.
Something moves outside the window, a shadow? Did she imagine it? Her mind starts to race with terrifying thoughts. It was the ANBU coming to finish the job, it was Konoha, no longer allies, coming to crush her family, her new village.
Shuichi and Kana continue to talk to each other, trying to establish boundaries and agreeing with Akira's assumption. They don't notice Akira's eyes become glassy, how her breathing becomes more ragged and how her hands have turned into tight fists, gripping at table. Temari does though and is up and moving just as Akira leaps upward and out the door.
"Akira!" She shouts as she follows her friend out of the door. Temari hears the door slam behind her but doesn't see where her friend has gone as worry starts to rise in her throat.
"T-Tem…" Temari whirls around to see where Akira is leaned against the house, her arms are braced against it with her head resting on them and between her knees. Temari lets out a breath of relief as she rushes over to her friend.
"I thought you ran off." She says gently as she kneels next to Akira who shakes her head her breathing deep but still ragged.
"I just... I couldn't… breath!" She huffs as though they had just finished an intense round of training as Temari nods and rubs her back.
"Just keep resting your head-."
"Beasty?" A voice calls out as Akira and Temari both look up the sun in their eyes as Akira blinks against the light, her mind reeling.
"I-I know that voice." She mutters as the origin for the voice scoffs.
"I would hope so! You can't forget your old teammates after all!" They blink against the light as a tall shinobi leans down and out of the sun.
Temari blinks at the bright green hair and deeply tan skin of the Konoha shinobi before her as he grins. His teeth perfect and bright white in the light. "Long time no see Beasty!"
Akira blinks at him, her panic subsided from the sudden intrusion as she blinks at the man. Something clicks in her mind as she remembers walking out of a building, into bright light and-.
"Mochi!?" Temari whips her head toward Akira, her mouth slightly open in confusion and if she was in a better mood Akira would have found it comical.
"In the flesh!" He says as he gives her a wink, his eyes dark in the light as Akira stares at him.
"What are you doing here?" She asks staring at her old teammate as he lets his grin slide off as he shrugs.
"Came here on assignment with your brother. Figured I'd find you if I found him since you up and left the village." He says as Akira blinks at him.
"I did?" She asks as the green-haired shinobi blinks at her.
"Well I mean you said goodbye…. Are you ok?" He asks after a beat staring at her as she looks down and shakes her head softly.
"She had an accident from her last mission and is recovering lost memories." Temari covers glancing at her friend as the boy nods in understanding.
"Oh ok, I'll keep joking down to a minimum then to help keep things straight." He sits on his heels as he looks at Temari's teal eyes. "Name's Masao Komi," He says extending his hand as Temari's eyes narrow once again. "Mochi is a nickname. Reserved for my friends, and since your friends with Beasty, then you can definitely call me Mochi."
"Temari." She greets shaking his hand as Akira's eyes narrow.
"Ok so, what's the assignment? And why are you calling me Beasty?" She asks as Masao blinks at her and glances at Temari surprise on his face before looking at Akira concern finally hitting his features.
"Damn you really don't remember?" He mutters as he glances at Temari again, his brow furrowing deeper as he looks back at Akira who nods.
"It's fine, I trust her." She says as Masao sighs and rubs a hand over his face.
"Just you made me promise-."
"Well at this point I don't think it matters." She chuckles as he sighs and meets her eyes hard. Temari looks between the two and suddenly feels a little awkward as she studies the slight changes in their expressions that mirror whatever conversation they were having with their eyes as he sighs.
"Ok but first lemme talk with Shuichi and see about what's going on with the mission. Then we can go somewhere quiet and talk." He says as he rises to a stand. Masao holds out both his hands to the girls as Akira grips it firmly and allows him to haul her up. Temari blinks against the light, and is grateful as Masao moves in front as she grabs his hand. Her breath catches a little in her throat as he pulls her up almost effortlessly before giving her a small smile and moves into the house.
"Akira- Oh…. Hey Mochi." Shuichi starts as Masao rolls his eyes.
"Hey to you too! You do remember we have a mission we have to get through, right?"
"Yeah I know but-."
"But nothing! Go get that scroll to the Kazekage's office before I have to tell you off again about getting sidetracked!" Masao orders as Shuichi shrinks back a little before rising up and glaring at the green haired boy.
"Hey my sister got her mind all fucked up and I'm trying to-!"
"I know about Akira which is why I'm telling you to go on ahead while I wrap it up! You don't remember every mission she went on or what she did when she wasn't with you, but I do!" he shouts as Shuichi blinks before sighing as Kana rises to a stand as well.
"I'll go with you to give them privacy and I need to pick up some forms too anyway." Kana says softly as strokes Akira's cheek as she passes. Her daughter doesn't lean into her touch, but Kana takes what she can get as she smiles softly at her.
"I'll be back soon little Aki." Shuichi says engulfing her in a hug as she squeezes back.
Temari looks at Masao quickly after they leave as she moves to the kitchen. "Tea?"
"No thanks. But you wondered why I called you Beasty?" He asks glancing at Akira as she sits at the table, while Masao joins her, turning the chair around to rest his arms on the back of it.
"Yeah."
"You sure you want the truth?" He asks hesitantly as she nods. "Ok fuck it all. When we became a team, it was you, me and a girl named Jin. She was the peacekeeper and often times the tie breaker since we didn't get along all the time. See we were like water and oil sometimes, but we worked well as a team because of it. Jin helped smooth things out and was just a fantastic person. I don't think I ever met someone as understanding as her." Masao shakes his head as he sits on the couch as Akira shifts against her dining table.
"But then during the Konoha Crush operation, a Sound Nin abducted her. She was tortured ruthlessly, and what they did to her was inhumane. You absolutely lost it once we tracked them down."
Masao pauses and turns toward Akira. Temari feels her grip on her glass loosen as he gives her a blank look.
"I watched you kill 12 Sound Nin just as ruthlessly as they killed Jin. You almost skinned one alive, you burned another so badly he practically cooked from the inside out. You ransacked their hideout until there was nothing left alive. That's why I call you Beasty."
The dark tunnel was back, as Akira descended into the memories into who she was before Suna just as Temari's glass hits the floor.
-End- Song Choice: Broken Arrow by The Script ended up being the last choice in a battle to find a decent song to fit since I imagined Rei and Kana as the people mention in the song. I hadn't planned on this chapter being as long as it was and for it to have included so much. Gaara will be featured in the next chapters as their relationship grows. And yes I know some people believe he became Kazekage at 14, but personally? You'll see how my headcanon for him actually being 15 will work out now. Anyway it was an honest struggle to find a good song choice but the next few chapters are already planned and or written.
Hope you enjoyed! Bye.
