The next morning, we saw Ai off at the train station. She had a very early train, but we aren't going to see her for several weeks, so we decided to go with her to say goodbye. Her family is in Hokkaido, so she has a long journey from Tokyo.

By the time we get back to Akari's, her parents are both gone. Apparently, they will be until the afternoon. We take advantage by snuggling in Akari's bed. We're in our usual position. Me on my back with an arm around her and her on her side with her arms around my waist.

"Is there anything you want to d-do while we're here?"

I haven't thought about that in a while with all the Carsten and Ai stuff, but there are two things I wanted to do.

"I think it would be nice to see Kaito and Daisuke and…I'd like to go to Saki's grave. My dad actually has some of his ashes and a gravestone here too."

Akari sits up and kisses me before smiling. "We'll d-definitely do those things."

"Anything you wanted to do?"

She looks at me with what I've come to realize are her bedroom eyes. They are quite effective on me. "Well there is one thing I r-really want to do right now." She slowly moves her hand down from my waist to my inner thigh, making me shiver in anticipation.

Ever since the first time we slept with each other (in the not so wholesome way), we've been quite active in the bedroom. Unless we're really tired, we usually do something before bed. It feels amazing but also makes us both feel even closer. I've certainly fallen more deeply in love with her as a result. We're both very emotional about sex which is nice. It's far more than just a physical act for both of us. Falling asleep together afterwards might just be my favorite feeling in the world.

Surprisingly, Akari has a very robust sex drive. More of one than I have and mine seems to be plenty healthy. She initiates things more often than I do but it never takes her long to get me in the mood. Normally what she's doing right now would be more than enough. But…I have my reservations given where we are. I better voice them while my mind is still clear enough to do so. If she moves her hand anymore, I don't think I'll remember my objections.

"Are you sure we should? feel like it would be…disrespecting your mom. She didn't want us to share a room for a reason, you know?"

Akari leaves her hand in place while she thinks for a moment. "W-well…my door has a lock. So even if they came home, we would have t-time to get dressed and stuff. They won't find out."

I laugh, "Yeah? What if they happen to come home when one of us is being loud. I mean we can muffle ourselves, but it only does so much. What then? And wouldn't they ask why the door was locked in the first place? Wouldn't both of us coming out of your room after the door was locked clue them in on everything?"

Akari sighs in frustration and retracts her hand, "Y-you're right."

I stroke her hair "You know I want to, right? I love doing that with you. It's just…the location."

She smiles, "I know. I guess w-we can make it a week."

I giggle, "Yes, I think we'll manage. Maybe it will make things even more exciting once we go back to Yamaku. Besides, we can still have lots of nice snuggles."

She puts her arms back around my waist and smiles, "That's t-true. Snuggles are the best anyway. They are…k-kinda how I fell in love with you."

I stroke her hair, "I think they were a big part of it for me too. Even if I took longer to figure it out. You always made me so…comforted, even in hard times. You helped me fall asleep so many times."

"Good. So, f-first thing on the agenda: snuggle nap."

I laugh, "Sounds good to me."

—-

We've been in Tokyo for a few days now. We went to the university with her mom one day, and Akari showed me the small exhibit about Saki in their concert hall. She's not only the most notable music alumni of Yamaku, but one of the most important music alumni of the University of Tokyo, which is very impressive. Walking around the campus was nice too. This was where my dad went to university and it's definitely a place I could end up too.

I've gotten to spend more time with Akari's mom and dad, and it's mostly gone quite well. I have a hard time around her mom sometimes because I genuinely fear her. But she's been quite nice to me…by her standards.

We're going over to Kaito and Daisuke's for dinner tonight. Turns out, they are a 7-minute walk from Akari's family home and it's on nice flat terrain so I can do it. Akari really likes walking because she was cooped up so much as a kid. She and Michi went for walks a lot and I know she enjoyed it. It is a little frustrating that I can't do it with her very often. So, I'm enjoying our little walk.

"This is it."

I look at the address on my phone and the one on the building.

"Yep, looks right. They are number 619."

Akari locates the right buzzer and pushes the button, Kaito responds.

"Yes, who is it?"

"Akari and Kayoko."

"Great, I buzzed you in. See you soon."

When we enter the building, we see it isn't exactly in the greatest condition. It is old and a little run-down. It could use a fresh coat of paint or five. I suppose it makes sense that this is a place students could afford. However, the state of the building has me a little worried about the elevator. Luckily, it seems to be functional, though I held my breath until we got off it.

We locate the right apartment and then I knock on the door. Daisuke opens it with a smile on his face. I immediately hug him a little more aggressively than someone with my condition should, but luckily, I don't pay the consequences.

Akari is a little timid of course, but she and Daisuke smile at each other before sharing a quick hug.

I look around and see it is a studio apartment. It is one big room that is simultaneously a bedroom, dining room and living room, and one bathroom. There is a full kitchen though, and I'm sure that was a requirement of the man who is currently busying himself in it. At first I think about just hugging Kaito, but then I realize that's a really bad idea. So instead, I walk over and say, "Hi Kaito, can I hug you?"

He laughs, "Hello, Kayoko, of course you can." I hug him and Akari nervously says hello. I'm a bit surprised by this, but then I remember the two have only met on one or two occasions.

After the hug I see what Kaito is cooking. "You're using a wok? I figured we would be having some international cuisine tonight."

Daisuke laughs softly and Kaito crosses his arms and glares in his direction. "I'm doing quite well at culinary school in all the different types of cuisine…but I am not doing quite as well when it comes to Japanese cuisine. So…in making dinner for you tonight you could say I am studying. Daisuke, would you like me to laugh at you about the classes you have to study extra for?"

"No. You're right. Sorry Kaito."

It is kind of funny that he's not doing as well as the cuisine of the country he grew up in, but I guess he must not have spent nearly as much time on it as on everything else. Come to thing of it, I've eaten his cooking more than a half dozen times, and it was never Japanese food.

"It's too bad my mom's not here. She would get an A+ in Japanese cuisine and could tutor you." I laugh softly, "She's…not so good at everything else. Kind of the opposite of you I guess."

Kaito laughs, "Well, I'm glad you'll have an A+ to compare to what I serve you. Having your review might prove quite helpful."

Akari asks "D-do you want any help, Kaito?"

"Thank you for the offer, but no. I need everything under my control or things can go a little wrong. I have everything exactly where I need it."

Akari nods and then makes a cute, embarrassed face when she realizes how futile it was. Then she says, "Okay, that m-makes sense."

The three of us leave Kaito to finish cooking and we take a seat at the dining table.

Daisuke says, "Pretty nice your parents live so close."

"Yeah, it really is. It will be really easy to v-visit any time we're here."

Daisuke smiles at Akari and then looks at me. I feel like his eyes are saying, 'Oh, it's 'we' is it?'

…

Before much longer, we set the table and dinner is served. Kaito made Yakisoba with tofu. It's really good. As I'm enjoying it, I look up and see Kaito watching me. Well, no…that's not accurate for obvious reasons. But he's certainly observing me, I guess trying to discern what I think. He now notices I stopped eating.

"What do you think Kayoko? How does it compare to an A+?"

What an awkward position to be in. He's the host and made us a nice dinner and he wants me to critique the meal.

"Well, it's really good. An A, I would say. It might just be personal preference, but I like it a little spicier."

He smiles, "That's helpful, thank you."

"And you Akari? I trust you've had some of Mrs. Nakai 's stir fry too?"

She's quiet for a moment so I look over at her and I can see the signs of anxiety on her face. Her eyes are wide and she looks frozen. She doesn't know Kaito very well and it is a question I was anxious about myself. I rub my leg against hers under the table. It seems to work.

"Uhm…wh-what Kayoko said. It is r-really good, m-maybe m-more spice."

Kaito nods, "Thank you both."

Akari looks very relieved, and I smile at her. She smiles back and nudges my leg under the table.

After we finish, me and Akari do the dishes together. It makes me think a little of what it would be like if we share an apartment after we graduate. Everything about this visit makes me think of that. I'd really love it if we could be like Daisuke and Kaito. They got together at around the same age we did, and they're still together after Yamaku.

After that we still have some time, so we head back to the dining table as it's really the only place in the small apartment that can really accommodate four people.

When we do, Daisuke says,

"So…there was something we wanted to talk to you two about tonight. It isn't something everyone likes to talk about it, so if it isn't, just let us know and we'll talk about something else. We have a bit of…kinship now, I guess…both being same-sex couples. So…I thought it might be nice to talk about that a little. We don't have that many people to talk to about it, and I'm sure you don't either."

Akari and I look at each other and she subtly nods so I say, "That would be nice. You two are good role models and we could definitely use your guidance."

Daisuke nods and asks, "We've both wondered…how do you identify?"

I think for a few seconds and then say, "I'm…not sure. I had a boyfriend I truly loved. I enjoyed…being intimate with him. So, I guess I could go with 'bisexual'?" I shrug, "What really matters to me is that I love Akari. So, if someone called me a lesbian because we are together, I wouldn't fight them on it. We actually haven't even talked with each other about how we identify." I turn toward Akari. "You've loved a guy before. Do you think of yourself as bisexual?"

Akari fidgets for a moment, "Actually I…th-think I might be gay."

I don't hide my surprise when I say, "Really? What about Michi and Carsten?"

She wrings her hands and looks down. "I dunno…looking b-back I sort of think I was c-confused. I thought I loved Carsten, b-but I'm not so sure now. He was nice to me and I l-liked being around him…b-but I had so few friends before him. He was my first c-close friend and he was a boy s-so I thought it was romantic feelings…but I think now m-maybe it was just the feeling of close friendship. Then, when I d-dated Michi I always t-tried to get out of…intimacy, and we were intimate, I didn't enjoy it nearly as much as…" She trails off and opens her eyes very wide. I'm blushing a little myself.

Daisuke laughs. "It's fine Akari. We aren't offended. We're all adults here, more or less. There's nothing wrong with you and Kayoko being intimate. You love each other. It kind of comes with the territory." Kaito nods.

She gives them a relieved smile and continues. "Okay w-well my point is…I think maybe I'm gay. I do look at guys and think, 'Hey, he's attractive,' b-but now I'm not so sure that's the same as being attracted to them. S-so…If someone told me I had to pick an orientation…I would say I'm gay. But…like Kayoko said, it doesn't really matter." She smiles at me and takes my hand, "We love each other and that's that."

Kaito smiles and takes Daisuke's hand, "Yes…that's all that really matters."

Daisuke smiles at his boyfriend but then turns back to us and grimaces, "Your mom…told us about what happened with that classmate of yours. I'm so sorry about that." He laughs wryly, "I don't normally condone violence…but I'm glad Carsten hit him." He sighs, "That kind of thing comes with the territory, I'm afraid."

"Yeah…that day, I really understood why you kept things a secret for so long, that's for sure."

"Y-you two have dealt with that kind of thing too?"

Kaito nods, " On most days…nothing like that happens. But…the days where it does happen, stick with you. I'd say that on average, there's two incidents a year, or something like that."

Daisuke sighs, "That sounds about right."

"What d-do you do when it happens?"

"Ignore it, walk away, and have your phone ready to dial police."

I frown, "That's so scary…have you ever had to call?"

Kaito says, "No. We haven't ever had people try to hurt us or threaten us…but we feel like it's only a matter of time."

Akari grimaces, "D-does it…ever hurt less to hear people say these things?"

Kaito says, "I think so. You…kind of learn to cope over time, I guess. But…it does still hurt."

"I-I'm glad it gets a little better. It was…hard. W-we both got really upset, even hearing it from someone we already despised."

I squeeze Akari's hand and smile at her. "Yeah. We haven't had an incident since…but we are on the lookout now."

Akari nods, "I'm g-going to add Yamaku security and local police to my phone now while I'm thinking about it…that's a good idea."

Akari takes out her phone and her face goes white.

I squeeze her hand, "Hey…what's wrong?"

"I-it's 9:30."

"Oh." I look at Kaito and Daisuke. "We were supposed to be home 30 minutes ago."

Wow, we really lost track of time. We must really have been thirsty for advice from an older same-sex couple, even though we didn't know it.

I stand up and start getting ready to leave. "Okay…well, we can get home really quickly at least."

She looks up at me with a distressed look on her face, "M-my mom tried to call three times. She's going to be r-really mad at me."

Daisuke gently says, "Sorry…we really lost track of time. Tell her it's our fault, okay?"

Akari tries to put on a smile but it's not convincing anyone. I don't blame her. Daisuke's excuse won't hold any water with Mrs. Yoshida.

"Well…let's just get back to the house. Maybe she'll go easy?"

Akari nods but doesn't look convinced.

Kaito says, "Well…it was nice having you two. Let us know next time you're in the city."

"Thanks, Kaito, we will…sorry to rush out like this, but yeah…you get it. See you two!"

Akari waves and then says, "Bye!" when she realizes a wave doesn't really work with Kaito.

The walk back to Akari's house is tense. She has a look on her face like she just heard one of her family members has passed away. Truthfully, I'm really scared myself. I really don't ever want to see the version of Akari's mom I encountered in the medical building that day. I'm dreading that that's who I'm about to see.

When we walk in the door, Mrs. Yoshida quickly descends upon us. We're only about a meter in front of the door. She must have been waiting for this moment. The look in her eyes isn't quite as scary as it was in the medical building that day…there aren't any tiny explosions, but there does seem to be a fire of sorts flickering inside of them.

There's a look of deep frustration on her face when she asks, "Where were you two?"

Akari bows her head. "I'm s-sorry, mom. We never left Daisuke and Kaito's. We just lost track of time."

She shifts her gaze to me, and I start to feel weak at the knees. "Is that the truth?"

Does she think we went to a love hotel or something?

I stand up completely straight and bow my head. "Y-yes, ma'am. We were just talking with my cousin and his boyfriend after eating dinner. I-it was nice to see them after s-so long and time got away f-from us. I'm very sorry."

She shifts her gaze back to Akari, "Why didn't you even answer your phone?"

"I h-had it on silent and d-didn't take it out for a while. I m-made a mistake. I'm very sorry."

"I was very worried about you both. I thought maybe Kayoko could have been hurt, or you might have had an anxiety attack. Don't let this happen again, or you'll both be spending the rest of this visit in your rooms." She looks at me, "I need to get your number Kayoko, so something like this doesn't happen again."

I nod, "Yes ma'am." We exchange numbers in a very tense environment. Then, we both give her genuinely contrite nods. She seems satisfied with this and goes off to the master bedroom.

She isn't wrong about any of this. We messed up. My mom would be mad too if we told her we would be back at a certain time and then we didn't. And on TOP of that, we didn't answer when she called us either.

We head to Akari 's room, but I don't plan on dawdling there very long given her mother's mood.

Once we're in there we sit down on the bed.

"Th-that wasn't as bad as I expected."

I laugh, "Really? I almost peed my pants."

Akari giggles, "It was scary…but she normally would have p-punished me. I can't believe we only got a warning."

"Maybe she's getting softer?"

Akari thinks about it for a moment. "It…k-kind of seems like it. She's been…warmer this whole visit."

"Why do you think that is?"

She smiles at me, "I think she really likes you."

"Really? That's the reason?"

Akari shrugs, "You're the only thing that's d-different."

"Well…that would be nice. If I want her to keep liking me though, I should probably get out of her daughter's bedroom this late at night."

Akari giggles and we exchange a deep kiss before she rests her forehead on mine. "Not sleeping with you and not sleeping with y-you is hard."

I laugh, "I agree. But only a few more days. Then we can do a whole lot of both of those. Promise."

I give her a playful kiss on her neck before I give her a soft kiss on her lips and we part for the night.

—-

Tomorrow is our last full day in Tokyo. We're going to visit the graves of Saki and my dad, and I'm feeling very emotional about bringing Akari with me. I love her so much. I already find it hard to think about a future without her, which scares me a little. We've been together two months and we're only 17. But I know she feels the same.

We're snuggling in her bed right now. Something we can't do too late in the night here for fear of Akari's mom, and I'm going to have to go to my room soon. But there's something I want to tell Akari before I do.

"I'm really glad you're coming with me tomorrow."

Akari squeezes me a little and smiles, "Me too. I know h-how important they are to you, so it's really special that you want me to go. Kind of like meeting your other parents. P-plus, not very often you get to go to a music legend's grave."

I smile at her, "It is special. I wouldn't be bringing you if I didn't love you so much." I give her a soft kiss. "I'm getting kind of emotional about it. It…makes me realize that there's…something I want to tell you about when my dad died. Something no one knows…b-but my family and my therapist."

Great, I'm already choking up about this.

She nods, sits up and hugs my head to her chest and starts stroking my hair. She can already tell there's going to be some crying. Just the fact that she knows I'm going to need this is enough for my tears to get started.

"I f-found him that morning. My m-mom was there too…b-but…she kind of wasn't. I didn't know at the time b-but she was in shock. She couldn't respond. So, I was a-alone…I thought they were b-both really hurt or something."

The therapist said it was surprising I didn't resent my mom for that, so I should make sure Akari doesn't., "P-please…don't think less of my mom because of it."

She's sniffling a little as she continues to hold me and stroke my hair. She softly says, "Kayoko, I would never think less of s-someone for having a m-mental breakdown. I have them all the time, remember?"

I nod, "W-well…I had to figure out what to do, and I c-called the ambulance and then my aunt. A-and…my mom kind of snapped out of it when they tried to take him…" I start crying harder. "...she d-d-didn't want him to go. She started sobbing and yelled at them. She tried to physical stop them. It w-was really hard to see. But once they took him, she went back into shock. She…stayed that way for a w-week. I…I thought I lost th-them both…it w-w-was the hardest time in my life…" I trail off and start sobbing into her chest.

Akari squeezes me tighter and says, "That sounds s-so hard, Kayoko. It's amazing y-you and your mom came out of that. I can't imagine losing one of my p-parents that way…much less both." She puts her hand under my chin, and I tilt my head up and she kisses me softly. "Thank you for sharing that with m-me…I'm sure it was hard." She pauses for a moment. "I don't want to distract from your dad because of where we're going t-tomorrow. But…I'll t-tell you about my hardest times soon, n-now that you shared yours."

I have wanted to know more for a while, but I have avoided prying. I guess we've both done that. She only talks in very vague terms about everything she went through with her lupus. I have only very vaguely discussed my dad's death until now. Neither of us has ever tried to dig deeper.

I sit up and put my hands on either side of her face and pull her in for a kiss, then I tell her, "I'd like that." I sigh. "It really sucks we can't sleep together tonight."

Akari giggles, "It really does."

—-

Akari and I are at the cemetery. We're here to visit Saki's grave, and my dad's Tokyo grave too.

We're holding hands as we walk. I know the path well. I have visited Saki's grave every year since I was five. When we get there, we walk hand in hand and sit down together in front of them.

Saki's grave is clearly the older one, her gravestone has some signs of erosion. However, there are many fresh flowers. Clearly people apart from family visit her grave. I guess like Akari says, she's music royalty. My dad's is much newer. It's only been about two years. Somehow it feels like it has been a lifetime since that morning…and at the same time, it feels like it was yesterday.

I grab Akari's hand and say, "Well Akari, this is Saki and my dad. Saki and dad…this is Akari. She's my girlfriend."

She says, "Thank you both for helping m-make such a great girl."

I smile at her as tears start trickling down my face.

I wish you could really meet her, dad. I think you'd like her. She doesn't like science a whole lot, but she loves music. I think as much as Saki did. She's amazing like her too. I think she's going to be music royalty too one day. She's great to me and I love her very much. I think I'll be visiting your grave with her for the rest of my life.

After a few minutes, Akari asks "What was he like?" She has a few tears on her cheeks.

I smile at her. "Just…the b-best dad ever. Loving. Smart. Gentle. Patient. Funny. I really miss him."

Akari hugs me, "I know y-you do. I wish I could have met him. It sounds like you got those traits. So I guess in some ways…I have met him."

This pushes me into full on crying. I rest my head on Akari's shoulder and really let myself feel all the sorrow I still have. Akari cries with me.

Eventually, I've cried all the tears I can. As we're walking hand in hand out of the cemetery Akari says, "It's kind of amazing how understanding your m-mom was about Saki. How many w-women would have some of their husband's ashes buried with their first wife?"

"Yeah…I guess it is. I hadn't thought of it that way because that's just…how it always was. My dad never stopped loving her and my mom knew that. She helped my dad grieve for her. I think she understood because of her own grief."

I haven't talked with Akari about this much, and as close as they are my mom will probably tell her someday, so I don't want to say too much here.

"She lost her dad when she was 11."

Akari nods, "She m-mentioned their shared grief once. A…sad thing to bond over." She smiles at me. "But clearly, it worked."

—-

Akari and I are heading back to Yamaku today. We are excited to have more freedom to do what we want with one another, both in wholesome and not so wholesome ways. This was a great visit. I got to know her parents better, and doing some of my family stuff with Akari was nice.

We're eating a quick breakfast with Akari's mom, and she will be accompanying us to the train station. Akari's dad made us a western style breakfast and I am ecstatic about it. Mrs. Yoshida is smiling at me slightly, much as she did when I ate pasta on our first night here. She seems to like it when I enjoy food.

"You really like eggs, don't you?"

I laugh, "I do. It's…kind of like with pasta the other day. My dad used to make this a lot."

"Did your father spend a lot of time in the West? From his cooking, that's how it sounds."

I laugh, "He didn't. His English was horrible. Mine is probably already better. But he really liked cooking a wide variety of things. He was a scientist; I think he sort of saw it as 'experimenting.'"

She nods, "It is an admirable quality to want to try new things." She hesitates for a moment and looks very uneasy. Then she looks at me with a hint of sadness on her face and she clumsily puts her hand on mine. She doesn't try to hold my hand, she just sort of rests her hand on mine. The physical contact is so surprising that I flinch slightly. "I…am very sorry you lost him."

"Thank you. I really appreciate that."

And I really do. This is a really big thing for her, as evidenced by how hard it was to say that. But she wanted to do it for me. It makes me feel a little moved.

Once we finish breakfast, we get a cab and ride together to the train station. Once we get there, Akari 's mom gets out with us and gives her daughter a stiff hug.

"Thank you for coming to visit us, both of you. It was a nice time, and I hope you'll come back." Then she approaches me and gives me the same sort of hug she gave her daughter.

She gives me a small smile and says, "I enjoyed getting to know you better, Kayoko."

I smile back and say, "Yes, I feel the same. It was really nice."

We finish our goodbyes, and she gets back in the cab. We hold hands and walk towards the train station.

Akari smiles broadly and says, "I think my mom r-really likes you…it may not seem like it but-"

I smile. "You don't have to convince me. For her, everything she did this morning is equivalent to my mom taking care of you during a lupus flare, isn't it?

Akari giggles, "Yeah, pretty much"