Welcome back to Total Drama Neo Side Stories. Today's episode will follow characters who haven't been in the spotlight since the last aftermath special.
Before we begin, I'd like to once again thank everyone for the reviews on Episode 8. Given how ambitious it was, I'm glad some of you enjoyed it. Also, thanks to everyone who has participated in the Popularity Poll so far. While it's not closed yet, there were definitely some votes for characters I did not expect and others I did. I guess that's just the fun thing about writing.
Anyways onto the show!
Total Drama Neo Side Stories 02 – A Day at Playa Des Losers Dos
Total Drama Presents
With Affiliation with Fresh Empire
Welcome to Playa Des Losers Dos
…
On an empty black screen, a voice begins to narrate to an unseen audience. He had a voice resembling an American vintage 50's announcer.
"Greetings and salutations. If you are watching this video, it is with great pleasure and satisfaction to say…you lost. You lost the opportunity of a lifetime to make a great name for yourself and to indulge in fabulous fame and riches. However, we here at Fresh Empire sympathize with your pain, so out of pity we built a place for you to peacefully cope with your failure."
The background changes to a beautiful backdrop of an island resort. There was a giant resort house, purple spindle trees and foliage decorating the locale, and a moderately large mountain range far into the background.
"Welcome to Playa Des Losers…Dos, a spiritual successor to the now defunct and appropriately named Playa Des Losers."
The background image changes to a pin-up shot of a jolly Caucasian man with black slicked-back hair, blue eyes, and a long scar above his left eye. It was a pin-up because he was also naked, laying on his right side, and covering his crotch with a Spalding basketball.
"During the pre-production of Total Drama Neo, CEO of Fresh Empire Wallace Vasey expressed great interest in replicating the same feel of the first Total Drama season."
A headshot of a fair-skinned overweight man in a black suit appeared on the screen. Unlike the previous man, he had a stern demeanor, hazel eyes, and he was bald.
"When it came to how to treat the unfortunate souls who were eliminated from the island, Vasey decided to rebuild a brand-new loser resort for them, much to the dissatisfaction of his Construction Manager Spur Cutter. The only problem was the location."
The screen cut to a blue planet similar to Earth but covered in smaller landmasses was next to be displayed.
"With the era of the Multiverse underway, Vasey did what any good executive would do and procrastinated on the matter. During a vacation to Strandopolis, on Universe-579, he discovered something of great importance. After a drunken knife fight, Vasey said to his associate who was with him, Thomas McGillis lead producer of the Total Drama series: Hey this place would make a great daycare for losers.
Wallace is shown shaking hands with an unidentified man in a suit.
"And so after a hefty fee, Vasey bought out one of Strandopolis' many islands and construction was underway, and by the release of the first few episodes of TDN, Playa Des Losers Dos was born. Now I bet you're wondering, what's so special about Playa Des Losers Dos? Well, my ignorant viewer allow me to explain in careful detail."
The narrator took a deep breath and spoke at an insanely fast speed. As he did images of each area quickly flashed onscreen.
"There'stheclubhouse,outdoorbuffetandgril,hottub,swimmingpoolwithadivingboard,gym,recroom,spahouse,basketball,tennis,&volleyballcourts,bonfirepit,andtheshoppingarea."
The narrator took deep, slow breaths before he continued.
"Surely there's enough to keep you and your friends entertained. Now before I leave you to your fun there are a few rules you must know. Number one: Follow the safety rules. Number two: Respect others. Number three: Keep all facilities clean. Number four: Do not go anywhere near the mountains. Finally, number five: Remember to have fun but mostly do not forget rule number four. I mean it. Now enjoy your new summer home and remember, you belong to Fresh Empire. Bye-bye."
End of Video
XXXXXXXXXX
The scene opens on a bright sunny day at the resort. On a basketball court, Blossom, Numbuh 3, Mordecai, and Bloo were playing a 2v2 game. On the sidelines, Courage was watching and keeping track of the score. Currently, it was 27 (Blossom & Numbuh 3) to 20 (Mordecai and Bloo).
Blossom was trying her best to handicap herself, given her superhuman abilities. However, she was doing very well despite this fact. While Bloo was in possession of the ball, Blossom swiped it from him and dribbled down the court. Once she was at the 3-point line, she took a shot and the ball went in like butter.
"Yay!" Numbuh 3 cheered. "We won again!"
Blossom rushed over to high-five Numbuh 3, who was also excited by their victory. Mordecai smiled with approval. Really, he didn't take any joy in beating kids in a game of basketball. He was just there for the fun. Bloo on the other hand wasn't as thrilled.
"ARRRGH!" Bloo was visibly upset about the score and proceeded to rage uncontrollably. In a fit of rage, he picked up the ball and threw it threw it a Courage.
Courage yelped and braced for impact, but he was saved by a swift catch by Blossom.
"Nice pass, Bloo," she teased. "I gotta say, your passing game is just as good as your shooting game."
"But Blossom, Bloo hasn't made a single point," Numbuh 3 noted.
"I know Kuki. That was the joke."
"Ohhhh." Numbuh 3 began to giggle. "Good one, Blossom!"
Bloo angrily faced his teammate. "Mordecai! Why can't you play any better!?"
"Dude it's not that serious," Mordecai affirmed. "Besides, I've been single-handedly carrying this team. The only reason I let you have the ball at all is because I feel bad for you. Also don't think we're gonna let that last throw slide, dude."
"Yeah, not cool," Blossom scolded.
"Pfft, whatever," Bloo spat. "I'm heading to the Tiki Bar.
"Ooh, bring me back a popsicle!" Numbuh 3 chirped.
"Get one yourself!"
"But you're the one going!"
"Just leave me alone!"
As Bloo stormed off, Blossom shook her head in pity. "What a sad, little blue person."
XXXXXXXXXX
The tiki bar was exactly what you thought it was and a bit more. The first thing you'll notice when stepping towards it is the unique and inviting ambiance. The hut is typically decorated with bamboo accents, thatched roofs, and carved wooden statues. The lighting in a Tiki Bar is mostly dim or ambient, creating a warm and intimate setting. Soft, flickering torches and string lights provide a gentle illumination, enhancing the tropical vibe.
Upfront were barstools for guests to be given refreshments that were stored in a mini-fridge. In the back was an outdoor kitchen, where all the buffet food would be prepared before being served on an outdoor table. The station was manned by two recent hires, who took great pride in their work.
One was a slim, yet muscular, long-legged man with scruffy blonde hair which he kept brushed over one side of his face. His eyebrows had spiral ends and were asymmetrical. He also had a short unclean beard and moustache. Finally, he wore a black suit with a white shirt and tie.
The other was a larger and elderly man with light blonde hair he kept tucked underneath a tall chef hat. He also had a strange mustache he kept in ribbons and a short stubble. Unlike his partner, he wore an actual chef's uniform. He also had a peg on his right leg.
The younger man was doing an extraordinary job at handling today's lunch. The way he prepared each assortment of meals was almost inhuman. The older man pridefully watched as his companion skillfully did his job.
While they were at work, Bloo had finally arrived at the bar and hopped on a barstool. He was still in a sour mood from earlier.
"Hey, Zeff," he said irritably. "You know the usual. One Bloo's Garbage Day."
"They beat you again, didn't they Bloo?" chuckled the younger man. He looked back at Bloo with a smug look on his face.
Bloo scoffed at that comment.
Zeff gritted his teeth and kicked his partner square in the bum. "Who told you to look away!? Keep your eye on the food, Sanji!"
"Alright! Keep your pants on old man!" Sanji returned his focus to the stove while keeping one ear open to listen to the conversation.
Zeff exhaled audibly and bent down to open the mini-fridge. He retrieved a tortilla-wrapped food item and placed it onto a plate. Afterward, he took out a Chef's knife, expertly sliced the food into four even portions, and served them to Bloo. "Enjoy." Your meal
Bloo stared slacked jawed at his snack. He would periodically look at Zeff and then back at food four times until he said, "What is this? This isn't my Garbage Day!"
"A tuna wrap. I'll be honest with you boy, a diet of three hotdogs, nacho chips, barbeque sauce, chili and beans, grilled onions, and cheese sauce shouldn't be indulged in every day."
"Hey, it's my body! Not yours you old fart!"
"Oh?" Zeff leaned in towards Bloo, his face getting closer and closer until the boy could see every detail of his face, including the wispy nose hairs protruding from his nostrils. "So, we're going to have a problem then?"
If he had pants, Bloo would be shivering in them. "Uhh, no sir. Tuna wrap is just fine."
Just then, Blossom zipped into the bar using her flight. "Heya, Mr. Zeff."
Zeff's serious demeanor changed into a more welcoming face. "Morning, Blossom! Hope you're doing well!"
"How ya' holding, kid?" Sanji greeted.
Blossom shrugged. "Eh, pretty good. Zeff, may I have a bottled water, an energy drink, one sody pop, and a Rainbow Monkey popsicle?"
"Coming right up!"
"By the way is Bloo giving you any trouble?"
"Bwahaha! He couldn't even if he tried."
Bloo grumbled and crossed his arms. "I'm sitting right here…"
"Hmpf, I thought so." Blossom eventually took her requested items and faced Bloo. "See ya, Bloo. Feel free to come back if you're up for it."
After Blossom soared off, Bloo angrily blew a raspberry at her.
"You're not gonna beat her with that attitude," Zeff muttered.
"Keep your comments to yourself!" Bloo rudely exclaimed. "Besides, I got a plan in the works! She'll regret beating me!"
"For your sake, it better not result in violence. If you do overdo it, then we're both going to need a surgeon to remove my foot from your ass. Although Blossom would probably send you to the hospital first."
"Probably's an understatement," Sanji muttered.
Bloo slumped over and picked up a slice of his tuna wrap. "Yeah, yeah. You don't need to rub it in." Bloo took one bite and his eyes lit up. "Heyyyy, this is pretty good! Can I get more of this!?"
Sanji closed his eyes and smiled to himself, taking in some pride after Bloo's comment.
"Glad you like it," Zeff grinned. "But trust me Bloo, you should learn to appreciate the people around you."
Suddenly, the peaceful chatter of patrons was abruptly interrupted by the distant yet distinct sound of an engine humming. It was so faint at first that some mistook it for the sound of waves crashing on the shore, but as it grew steadily louder, it became impossible to ignore. Conversations ceased, and all eyes turned towards the source of the noise, wondering what it could be.
"Hey," Sanji began, "You hear that?"
"Imma find out!" Bloo said taking another wrap from Zeff. He then darted off to find the others.
"Wait up!"
Before Sanji could even leave, Zeff smacked him in the head. "Did you forget we have a job to do!?"
As time passed, a massive, gleaming white space cruiser with the words Fresh Empire painted in bold letters on both sides, was spotted approaching the island. The vessel gracefully made its way towards the basketball court, attracting a fair amount of attention from everyone on the court.
"Is that thing about land here or is it just me?" Mordecai asked.
"You know what this means!?" Numbuh 3 exclaimed.
"What?"
"SPACE FIELD TRIP!"
Numbuh 3 was wrong, but that's okay because space travel is overrated. The ship made a slow descent onto the basketball court. Blossom quickly grabbed Courage, Numbuh 3, and Mordecai and flew them to a safe distance. The ship's legs popped out of their hatches and the engines rotated to face the ground. The cruiser flattened the court once it landed, and a loud WHIRRRRRR, sound emerged from the ship until the engines finally powered down.
"Talk about a rough landing," Blossom muttered.
"Sheesh they almost smushed us!" Courage whined.
"You think Bloo's somehow responsible for this?" Mordecai wondered.
"You think I'm responsible for what now?" Bloo arrived with his food on a paper plate.
"Can I have one?" Numbuh 3 asked Bloo.
"How about…N.O.!"
Numbuh 3 glared at him, trying the hold back the urge to strangle him. "Yeesh! No need to get all fussy!"
A large cargo door began to lower to the ground. Once a ramp was secured, a horde of construction vehicles began to make their way out.
"You guys wait here!" Blossom exclaimed. "I'm going to get to the bottom of this!"
Blossom flew off and immediately stopped in front of the lead bulldozer. The vehicle came to a screeching halt, along with the others tailing behind it. The door opened, and a tan-skinned man with shaggy brown hair, blue eyes, and a construction uniform hopped out.
"Ay, what's the meaning here?" he said in an Italian accent. "We're on a tight schedule!"
"Why'd you guys smash our basketball court?" Blossom yelled. "And who put you up to this!?"
"None of your business you damn brat!" cursed a late fifty-something bald, pale man, also exiting the vehicle.
The man had a long, gray beard, shaved-off eyebrows, and sunken-back black eyes. His build was slim, and he had very little muscle mass, however, he was certainly an uppity old soul. While he wore the standard construction worker threads, he chose not to wear a hard hat and instead wore what looked like a prospector hat.
"Pikk, why do always have to get hostile," said the blue-eyed man.
"I'll get as hostile as I want with whomever I want! Now scram punk, or I'll hit you with the front end of one of these trucks!"
Blossom let out a smug pout and placed her hands on her hips. "You're welcome to try, but unless you have something that can fly and let alone match my durability, I suggest you watch your tone and give me a straight answer!"
HONK HONK
Following the blaring sound of a car horn, a forklift came rushing to the front. The lift was elevated, and a man in a suit, along with a rainbow tie, was standing on top of it. Once the vehicle reached Blossom, it came to a halt, and the man jumped off.
"Now Pikk there's no need for any violence!" he mediated. "We don't want a non-work-related injury, because we won't cover it of course."
"Non-work-related injury?"
"Starting fights with random civilians is not written anywhere in your contract, at least I'm pretty sure it's not."
Pikk grumbled and stomped his foot. "I hate this job!"
The well-dressed man grinned and turned to face Blossom. "Sorry about that guy, he desperately wants to retire. You're one of those Powerpuff Girls from U-98, right? I'm Wallace Vasey. Nice to finally meet one of you. For that matter, it's nice to finally meet one of the TDN contestants."
"Wait you're Wallace Vasey? CEO-"
"Of Fresh Empire yes. You can also call me Wally if you'd like to."
Blossom was shocked to see such a big name gracing her presence. Given the circumstances, she could only assume something of the utmost importance was occurring.
"Blossom!" Numbuh 3 wailed.
Blossom turned around and noticed Numbuh 3 and the other three were running onto the scene.
"Hey, who's this guy!? I felt like I've seen him before."
Blossom scratched her head. "Um, he's the CEO of the media distribution company that owns our show."
"Huh?" said Numbuh 3, Courage, and Bloo unanimously.
"He's the big boss," Mordecai added.
"So, he's in charge of the show?" Bloo chirped. "For reals!?"
"I don't know how I can make it any clearer," Blossom muttered.
Bloo immediately scooted over to Wally's side. "Hey, my good man! Could you by chance get me back on the show!? You won't be disappointed by your decision. Besides, I have a long list of credentials who would love to recommend me!"
Wally playfully shook his head. "No, blue dude. I'm the boss of the guy who produces your show. Also, no I can't do what you're asking. I mean, I could probably give Tom the idea, but I don't really want to."
"…ha! Yeah, that's a good joke there, pal. Just hit me up whenever you change your mind."
"So why are you here?" Blossom inquired once again.
"Oh yeah." Wally cleared his throat. "You see, while your resort is pretty fabulous, we think it could be more fabulous. So, we're adding more facilities to this quaint little island."
"Not that you deserve it!" Pikk snapped.
Blossom was somewhat intrigued by the idea. "Oh…that's not too bad…one paper."
"Trust me it's fine. And to make up for today's accident, we'll build you an even bigger basketball court…with a nacho bar…and maybe a pool. I don't know, I'm just brainstorming here."
"Hey, that sounds cool!" Bloo happily exclaimed.
"Yeah, it does!" Mordecai hollered.
"Don't you think you're overdoing it, Wallace?" A bald, overweight man came strutting down to meet the group. His heavy stride showed confidence with each step he took. He wore a large yet identical suit to Wally's but instead of a colorful tie, he wore a standard black one.
"Ah, meet the man who's in charge of the operation," Wally beamed. "Mr. Spur Cutter! He graduated from Harvard."
"Hey, my mom wants me to go there," Numbuh 3 noted.
"Well, I'm sorry to say," Bloo began, "But you're gonna disappoint her."
"The pleasure is mine," Cutter greeted the group. "If you're all worried that we might interrupt your activities, rest assured we won't go anywhere near the current facilities."
"Hey by the way," Wally began, "Aren't there supposed to be six of you? Where's the short guy with the ugly widow's peak?"
Coincidentally, Vegeta was currently flying to the resort at Mach speed. He had just left the Interdimensional Customs located on Strandopolis after a trip. As he approached the resort, he was surprised to see a spaceship landed on the island. Once he caught sight of the others, he landed on that position.
"There he is!" Bloo bluntly announced to the world.
"What's the meaning of this?" Vegeta scowled.
Numbuh 3 leaned in to whisper to Courage. "Is it just me or does he look angrier than usual?"
Courage anxiously nodded his head in agreement. "I just hope he doesn't vent on us."
"Vegeta where have you been?" Blossom asked.
"I went back to my universe for a while. Now who is this man?"
"I'm the CEO of Fresh Empire, Vegeta," Wally answered. "Has anyone ever said you look like a troll doll?"
"Excuse me!?" Vegeta snapped. "What the hell is a troll doll?"
"Just a joke. You see we're here to renovate the resort. If there's something you like to request, please ask."
"And remember we have a budget," Cutter muttered.
"Dude, we are the highest-grossing media company in the multiverse. We can afford to spend like someone who just won the lottery."
"Is that so?" Vegeta knew exactly what he wanted. "I'd like for you to build a gravity chamber. One that's capable of emitting 300G's."
Wally raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me what?"
"Your gym is pathetic and not suited for a warrior of my caliber. Besides, I have personal reasons as to why I want one…"
Wally got a bit quirky. "Ohoho! Please do tell!"
Vegeta closed his eyes and crossed his arms. "I refuse."
A mischievous grin formed on Wally's face. "If you tell me I'll do exactly what you want, and if you don't you might as well forget it. Oh, and don't try bullying your way either, pal. I have a will of diamond."
Vegeta groaned. "Fine…my wife won't let me inside the gravity chamber anymore. She went on and on about enjoying this vacation instead of spending my time training."
"Is that it?" Wally scratched his head. "That doesn't sound so bad."
"I think your wife's right, Vegeta," Blossom remarked. "You rarely have any fun."
Mordecai, Numbuh 3, Bloo, and Courage nodded to that fact.
"Oh…shut up!" Vegeta hissed. "Now are you going to build it or not!"
"Pretty, pretty please?" Wally grinned.
Vegeta growled. "You're pushing it."
Wally laughed and wrapped an arm around Vegeta. "Don't worry Vegeta, I'm just messing with ya'. I'm sort of a prankster when it comes to my friends. Also call me Wally, pal. Don't worry, we'll get you that gravity chamber. If you have any schematics on how to build it, that would be a huge help."
"Whatever."
Wally removed his arm from Vegeta's shoulder and put his hands together. "Now, we're about to begin construction, so if everybody could please clear out and go do something that doesn't impede our work, and by our work I mean the workers' work."
XXXXXXXXXX
An hour later the construction workers had finally set up the vehicles and equipment. The blue-eyed man who drove the bulldozer earlier acted as the department manager who took all his orders from Cutter.
"Alright, fellas," he said. "You all know your roles, so let's get to work!"
"Yeah, get to work!" Bloo cried from the sidelines. He was also holding a tuna wrap.
Everyone's eyes were focused on Bloo.
"And who are you supposed to be?"
"Who are you supposed to be?"
"I'm Alfonso Tonio Ramirez…and don't call me Al."
"K' Al. I'm here to keep a close watch on you all. Since Mr. Wally is building what we want, I'm supervising this whole thing to make sure you don't mess things up. For the record, I want my nacho bar near the beach's edge thank you."
Alfonso rolled his eyes. "Just ignore him!"
The construction crew eagerly started work on the vacant spot on the island, with the sound of hammers and machinery filling the air. However, after only ten minutes, chaos ensued.
"Hey Frank!" said one worker.
His friend quickly turned his attention to him. "Yeah, Steve?"
"Check this out! This piece of junk is surging out!"
A steam roller was emitting a small electrical charge. As seconds passed, the charge grew exponentially. The vehicle eventually had a visible electromagnetic aura and eventually a bolt of light shot out. At the impact spot, a hairy, purple primate was standing in the middle of the construction site.
"What the hell is t-!"
Amidst the man's words, the beast bellowed, and a formidable electric blast discharged, emanating in all directions. The ensuing pandemonium saw workers frantically seeking safety while lightning strikes inflicted damage upon various vehicles and caused injuries to multiple people.
"Evacuate!" cried Alfonso. Unfortunately for him, he was blown away by an explosion from a vehicle.
The attack continued for thirty seconds until the monster dematerialized and disappeared.
Bloo looked on from where he was standing and took a bite from his lunch. "Food and a show? Who could ask for more!? Well, besides me."
Blossom quickly arrived on the scene and surveyed the area. "I'm too late…Bloo what happened?"
Bloo looked at her and shrugged. "A mondo cool monster attack?"
Blossom flew down to Alfonso so she could check his pulse. "Are you ok?"
Alfonso laid on his back and coughed. "Il…gorilla…luminoso…"
"I'm sorry, but…I don't know what you're saying. If my sister, Bubbles, were here, she'd be able to help you. She speaks great Spanish."
"WHAT!? I'm not Spanish! I'm Italian! Can't you tell by posh and flowy voice!?" Alfonoso stopped ranting and coughed violently.
"Oh…sorry. Look, could you just say that in English?"
"We were..attacked by…a…"
"A what!?"
"A..aaaa…..aaaaa…."
Blossom's eyes widened as she awaited an answer.
"….aaaaaaaa…aaaaaaaaachoooooo!"
Blossom rolled her eyes. "Nevermind. Maybe someone else will tell-"
"A…lightning gorilla." Eventually, Alfonso passed out.
"Lightning gorilla, huh?" Blossom muttered. "Sounds like a job for a Powerpuff Girl! Bloo!"
Bloo stops eating and quizzically stares at Blossom. "What?"
"…what are you eating?"
"A…tuna wrap?"
"Oh…well I'm glad you're eating healthy. I need you to gather everyone in the rec room. I'm going to find some clues."
Usually, Bloo would say no, but he was intrigued by the current events. "Ok, but after I finish my food."
XXXXXXXXXX
One tuna wrap later, Vegeta, Courage, Numbuh 3, Mordecai, Bloo, and Blossom were sitting at the rec room table. Mordecai leaned back in his seat and checked his phone, Numbuh 3 was playfully swaying from left to right without a care in the world, Courage was fiddling away with origami, Bloo smugly had his feet on the table, and Vegeta was the only one who visibly showed that he wasn't stoked to be here.
Blossom made her way to the front of the room to present the case to the others.
"This better be good," Vegeta said.
"Oh, it is Vegeta," Blossom reassured. "You see exactly at 11 AM today, the construction crew were attacked by a mysterious monster. An electrifying lighting ape!"
Vegeta was unconvinced. "Seriously?"
"I thought it was lightning gorilla!" Bloo shouted. "Also, that name kinda blows. How about we call it Thunderape instead?"
"Hey, how about Shockrilla!" Mordecai suggested. "You can't deny it gives off a cool yet cheezy monster movie vibe."
"Shockrilla," Blossom muttered to herself. "Yes, that rolls off the tongue quite nicely."
Bloo sunk into his chair and folded his arms. "Thunderape sounded better."
Numbuh 3 pulled a detective hat out of nowhere and plopped it on her head. "So, do we have any evidence?"
"I do!" Blossom moved towards a podium and pressed a button to lower a projector screen. "I compiled footage from the undamaged dashcams of each construction vehicle. I think you'll be quite shocked by what you see."
Everyone but Numbuh 3 audibly groaned at Blossom's pun.
Blossom used a laptop, that happened to be hers, to cast a video to the projector and what played was…...a video of Blossom dancing to Bumble Bee by Bambee. Blossom's face instantly turned red as the others watched with bewilderment and amusement. Blossom frantically moved her hands to close the video before even more embarrassing moments played.
"Well, that was shocking," Bloo joked.
"Heh-heh, ignore that!" Blossom awkwardly yelled. "Now…"
Blossom played the correct video, and the six watched as the Shockrilla rampaged across the construction site.
Courage's eyes popped out and he shook with fear. "That's the monster I saw when I went to the bathroom!"
"There's a monster on the resort?" Mordecai muttered.
"Doesn't look that tough," Vegeta muttered.
"Yay!" Numbuh 3 exclaimed. "Case closed!"
"Kuki, it's not," Blossom corrected. "Courage, what was your encounter with the Shockrilla like?"
Courage tapped his chin a few times. "Well, I screamed at it, and it screamed at me, and I ran away. I guess it did too."
"From your story, it sounds like our…ugh Shock-rilla is a coward. However, from what we're seeing it looks anything but."
"Actually his name is not Shockrilla," said a seventh voice.
"Who goes there!?" Bloo yelled.
Sitting in the darkness was a man cloaked…...in darkness. "Can someone turn on the lights?"
Mordecai got up from his seat and turned on the light switch on the other side of the room. It was an awkward moment for everyone involved. In a few seconds, the lights were on, and it was no other than Wally.
"How long were you here!?" Bloo asked.
"He's been here for a while actually," Vegeta answered.
"Huh!?"
"I could sense his ki."
"I knew he was here too," Blossom said. "X-ray vision. Pretty nice."
"I could smell his cologne," Courage added.
"I just saw his shadow," said Mordecai.
"Wow, Bloo!" Numbuh 3 beamed. "You're very unperceptive!"
Bloo frowned and faced Wally. "What are you doing here!?"
"Chill, chill," Wally pleaded. "I'm here to help, and that's not just some Shockrilla. That's Sasquatchanakwa."
"The yeti that showed up in the past seasons?" Mordecai asked.
"Exactly."
Mordecai raised an eyebrow. "How'd he get powers?"
Wally shrugged. "Maybe he got it from radiation on Wawanakwa or something. Anyways, Sasquatchanakwa was here on this island well before I discovered it. Don't ask me how he got here; I promised never to talk about the pickle incident to anyone."
"Pickles?" Bloo questioned. "What does this have to do with pickles?"
"Trust me, don't ask. After the pickle incident, I allowed him to live here since he didn't seem hostile back then, but now he's responsible for property damage and potential lawsuits. I wonder what pissed him off…"
Mordecai crossed his arms. "Maybe he's mad about you guys building stuff on his home."
"…no it's not that. He lives in the mountains. That's why we tell you not to go there."
"Well, maybe he's territorial and doesn't appreciate your construction work," Blossom pointed out.
"….no it's not that. I think."
Suddenly, Cutter bolted into the room.
"WALLACE!" he cried. "THE MONSTER ATTACKED AGAIN! He showed up several minutes ago and the whole thing is a mess!"
"Oh really?" Wally groaned. "This couldn't get any worse."
"The construction workers are unionizing. Also, Pikk and several others are going on a rampage. Also, the ship's coffee machine exploded due to a uh...short circuit."
"Oh really? Man, this is not my day. Oh well, time to pack up and leave. I guess that goes for you guys too. We're gonna have to abandon Playa Des Losers, again."
"What!?" Cried everyone but Vegeta. Although Vegeta was a bit astonished.
"NOOOOOOOOO!" Bloo cried out in anguish. "This is the best place ever! Not only that, but this is the only good thing I got out of joining this show!"
"Sorry, but I'm trying to maintain a progressive image. It makes me look good during interviews and news articles. Although, I wouldn't mind a completely unrelated third party subduing him so we can end this mess before it gets even worse."
"Don't worry Mr. Vasey!" Blossom exclaimed. "We'll solve this case for ya!"
"Yay!" Numbuh 3 hollered. "Mystery!"
Courage nodded with approval.
"I don't have anything better to do," Mordecai remarked. "So, I'm in."
"This sounds like a waste of time," Vegeta grumbled.
"Didn't you want your very own gravity chamber?" Blossom persuaded. "I'd say you have a bigger stake in this than all of us."
"Hmpf."
"Cool beans," Wally beamed. "Well, c'mon, Cutter. Let's go settle the legal disputes."
"At once, Wallace," said Cutter. "And I'm sure this will come out of the company's bankroll."
"Well duh."
And so, Wally and Cutter promptly left the building.
"Uh, we?" Bloo snarked. "There's no we, and there's no way I'm going to tango with a homicidal yeti."
"Would you do it for a tuna wrap?" Blossom asked.
"Nuh-uh. Nooooooo way!"
"Ok…how about two tuna wraps?"
"…make it three."
"Deal. Also, I have a feeling that this is too coincidental. Call it a hunch, but what if someone is directly responsible for Sasquatchanakwa's behavior?"
"I say we investigate his whereabouts and get details from the witnesses," Vegeta assessed. "We can cover more ground if we split up."
While Blossom had no fingers, she gave Vegeta what felt like a thumbs-up to her. "Good idea, Vegeta!"
"Hmm, looks like a mystery is afoot!" Numbuh 3 exclaimed.
"You know what this mystery needs!?" Mordecai exclaimed. "Some montage music!"
"No," Vegeta grumbled. "It absolutely doesn't."
XXXXXXXXXX
Blossom decided to ask Zeff about what he might know, and she took Courage and Bloo with her. Blossom also wanted to compensate Bloo for his involvement.
"Slow down with the food boy," Zeff muttered. "Just because it's healthy doesn't mean you should get rash about it."
"One more can't hurt," Bloo gleamed with ecstasy.
Zeff was currently feeding tuna wraps to Bloo, while slowly regretting ever introducing them to him. Sanji was currently cleaning the countertop with a wet rag as he chatted with Blossom and Courage.
"So there's a sasquatch on the island?" Sanji said with disbelief.
"I didn't think there'd be anything like that here," Zeff grumbled.
"Hmmm, or do you?" Bloo inquired.
"What are you yakking about now, Bloo?" Blossom groaned.
"Think about it. What if we're not chasing a crazy beast at all? What if we're chasing a person who dresses in a sasquatch suit who has a vendetta?" Bloo proceeded to hop onto the counter. "Zeff here's big enough to be our Shockrilla, so how 'bout it Zeff? You got something to hide?"
Zeff proceeded to grab Bloo by the head. As his scowl grew, the grip he held on Bloo increased. "Now look here brat! I don't know if it's the tuna wraps or if you're just a natural-born dunce, but I'm no sasquatch!"
"That's right!" Sanji sternly reassured. "We enjoy cooking here. I don't know why you think we'd want to ruin that."
"Ok…" Bloo grunted. "You make a sound argument."
Zeff huffed and let Bloo go. The blue dude was certainly grateful not to be crushed by someone with gorilla grip.
"Sorry we bothered you, Zeff," Blossom apologized. "But you know Bloo…"
"It's alright, lass. So, what's your plan now?"
"I'm not completely convinced…but Bloo's idea might actually hold some weight."
"Yeah, like I'd buy that," Sanji muttered.
"No, seriously. These series of attacks could be part of a larger plot."
Bloo was genuinely flattered someone was giving him credit. He boldly crossed his arms and immediately showed off a proud grin. "See, my genius holds no bounds."
"But before we jump to that conclusion, I'd like to find this sasquatch's supposed hideout and head to the mountains. That way, we can find out what's really going on."
"But aren't those off-limits!?" Courage shrieked.
"We must take risks Courage. That's what being a hero's all about."
"Well if you're going, be wary of the abandoned mines," Zeff warned.
"Mines?" Courage mumbled.
"You didn't know?" Blossom said mildly puzzled. "Strandopolis used to be a mining planet many centuries ago. However, after a freak mining accident, the planet abandoned the mining industry altogether and eventually opted for tourism."
"Don't you mean terrorism?" Bloo asked.
"Bloo...read a dictionary, please…and throw in a thesaurus while you're at it."
"How do you know all this?" Courage asked.
"I recommend reading The Completeish History of Strandopolis. It's a really good book. If you order now, you can get a 1% discount at any restaurant."
"And this is why I hate capitalism," Bloo muttered.
Courage gulped. "So we're going to the abandoned…dark…and possibly dangerous mine?"
"Oh, stop being such a wuss!" Bloo chastised.
"Leave him alone Bloo!" Blossom snapped. "If I recall, a certain someone was very vocal about not wanting to get involved earlier."
"I never said anything like that, AND if I did say something like that it uh….never happened, ok!?"
Blossom smirked and faced Courage. She then gently patted his head to comfort him. "Don't worry. I'll take care of anything that comes our way! I am a superhero after all!"
Courage whined a bit, but he did feel better knowing Blossom would be by his side. "Yeah! I'm no wuss!"
"Hahaha, that's good to hear!" Zeff laughed.
"We'll keep a lookout if the Shockrilla thing shows its face again," said Sanji. "Good luck you three."
XXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, in a barely lit room, Numbuh 3, Mordecai and Vegeta were interrogating someone. For some time now, they've been questioning many workers with very little success. This time it was Alfonso, and he was strapped to a chair. After he recovered, he was immediately brought in for questioning by Vegeta. Vegeta did him no harm, but Alfonso, a man who stood at six feet, was terrified by his imposing 5'4" stature and complied.
Numbuh 3 circled the table, holding her detective hat as she eyed the suspect. "Would you like anything? Like a glass of water?"
Alfonso nodded slowly. "That would be nice…"
Numbuh 3 snapped her fingers. "Mordecai! Hand me a glass!"
"Got it." Mordecai went to a nearby water cooler and took an empty plastic cup. As he filled it with water, he thought to himself about how much this felt like a movie.
Once Mordecai gave her the cup, Numbuh 3 swirled it around a bit. Alfonso began to extend his arm out to receive it, but instead, Kuki opted to splash him in the face with water.
"Wha-"
"You got what you wanted, so now give me what I want!" Numbuh 3 rudely ordered. "Now who are you!?"
Alfonso gulped. "I'm Alfonso Ton-"
Numbuh 3 slammed her fist down on a table. "SHUT UP AND LISTEN…hehe."
Alfonso was intimidated but he was also thrown off by her bubbly mannerisms.
Vegeta snickered and muttered under his breath, "This is quite the clown show."
Now, let me introduce you to my crew. Mordecai's the nice cop, so he'll be your best friend. I'm the passive-aggressive cop, so I'll be very fickle. Vegeta here is your worst nightmare! The not so nice cop!"
"Don't you mean bad cop?" Alfonso nervously asked.
"DON'T QUESTION ME!" Numbuh 3's angry demeanor instantly changed back to her usual self. "See what I did there? I changed from passive to aggressive just there, and now I'm passive again! NOW WHAT DO YOU KNOW!?"
Alfonso shrieked with fear. "WHAT DO I KNOW!? WHAT DO I KNOW!? I'LL TELL YOU! I had dreams of becoming an artist, so when I went to college, I decided to go for an art degree. But my mama she…"
Alfonso continued to ramble on and on. Numbuh 3 was captivated by his story, but Mordecai found the whole thing to be uncomfortable.
"Maybe we should calm him down," Mordecai muttered.
"Don't tell me you don't find this a bit entertaining?" Vegeta scoffed.
"…and so I realized that living off commissions for the rest of my life was not going to cut it. So, I became an architect! For my poor mama!"
"That was such a touching story," Numbuh 3 sniffed. "NOW TELL US WHAT YOU KNOW ABOUT THE SAYWATCH!"
"Sasquatch," Mordecai corrected.
"I DON'T KNOWWWWWW!" Alfonso cried with tears. "ALL I KNOW IS THAT HE TRIED TO KILL ME AND ONE OF MY EMPLOYEES SAID IT CAME OUT OF ONE OF THE STEAMROLLERS! NOW LET ME GOOOOOO!"
Just then, Cutter burst into the room and was appalled by what he was seeing. "What are you idiots doing!?"
"Hey that's not nice," Numbuh 3 snapped.
"Extremely," Vegeta muttered balling a fist. "I believe you owe me an apology."
Cutter gritted his teeth with fear. "Forgive me, sir."
Vegeta laughed. "Don't worry, I wasn't going to hurt a weakling like you."
Cutter groaned. "Ugh, you'd make good friends with Wallace."
"Look we're trying to find clues on the Shockrilla," Mordecai explained. "Unfortunately, we let our friend here get out of control."
Numbuh 3 innocently giggled.
"Well, this clearly isn't working!" Cutter groaned. "Unless you have any other plans you might as well give up. It's not you who'll be paying for this."
"Uh, could we at least investigate the crime scene?" Mordecai asked.
"…sure I don't see why not."
XXXXXXXXXX
Shortly after the interrogation, Vegeta and Co. left the resort and made their way to the construction site. Nearby, they noticed a group of construction workers striking out. Some of them were wearing bandages due to the injuries they sustained from the attacks.
"How can Mr. Vasey force us to work in these conditions!?" complained one worker. "I knew there was a possibility I could get crushed by a steamroller, mixed into cement, or skewered by a drill, but I never signed up to be electrified!"
"You said it, pal," Another worker agreed. "I just can't believe Mr. Vasey knew about that monster and didn't bother to tell us."
As they walked past, Mordecai overheard the ongoing conversation.
"I still don't get it," Mordecai said to Vegeta and Numbuh 3. "Why didn't Wally keep what he knew about Shockrilla confidential?"
Vegeta rolled his eyes at the mention of the name Shockrilla. "Wally appears to be a fool, but it looks like he has his own pride. I suppose he wouldn't accept not taking responsibility for any of this."
"Pride huh?"
The trio finally made it to the crime scene. The entire area was comprised of parked construction vehicles, which were surrounded by caution tape and cameras were set up everywhere.
"It looks like both attacks happened in the same place," Mordecai noted. "Looks like our sasquatch friend seriously doesn't like construction work. Guess we have one thing in common."
Vegeta observed the area and checked for irregularities. "Let's take a closer look."
Before Vegeta could step forward, Numbuh 3 threw her hands up to block the taller man. "Wait!"
"What are you squirming about!?" Vegeta snapped.
"You can't go past the caution tape!" she yelled. "Don't you know it's dangerous!? If you're not careful you could get….currrrrrrrsed!"
Vegeta and Mordecai exchanged confused looks before they stepped over the caution line.
Numbuh 3 shook her head in defeat while tipping her hat down. "I tried to warn them…it's ok guys! I'll wait here!"
"I think she watches too much Twilight Zone," Mordecai muttered to Vegeta. "So where should we start?"
Vegeta pointed to two small craters. "During both attacks, it showed up there, didn't move, and disappeared."
"So he teleports?"
"Don't be absurd. Remember what that pitiful man said? Our monster emerged from one of the steamrollers. I think it's able to travel through anything that uses electrical power."
"Sounds crazy, but I could make sense. Where would he escape to though?"
"Probably the starship. It's the largest vehicle around, and it's a good place for him to hide."
"But that makes no sense. How does an eight to ten-foot sasquatch get here undetected?"
"Maybe Blossom was right. There might be another person involved. My guess it's someone connected to Wally."
Numbuh 3 began to feel tired as Vegeta and Mordecai continued their investigation. She took a break from observing her companions and shifted her attention towards the tents where the workers were staying. Amidst the crowd, she noticed Pikk walking suspiciously towards one of the tents. The elderly man looked back several times before entering the tent.
After feeling bored, Numbuh 3 became intrigued and decided to follow the man. It was not difficult for her to sneak in as the workers were demotivated and disinterested. She peeked through the tent and listened to Pikk's ramblings.
"Hehehe!" Pikk laughed. "Just you wait, Wally! You'll get yours soon!"
Numbuh 3 gasped and immediately left the tent. Pikk heard the noise and turned his head, but he saw nothing.
"Hmmm…I better start my plan soon."
Numbuh 3 frantically returned to her partners. When she arrived, they seemed to be anxiously waiting for her.
Vegeta scowled and crossed his arms. "Care to explain-"
"No time! Did you find anything important!?"
"Yeahhhh we did!" Mordecai hollered. "Vegeta figured out that Shockrilla can travel through machines, and Vegeta figured out a plan!"
Numbuh 3's eyes lit up. "Oh okay! I also found something!"
"Spill it," Vegeta ordered.
"That Pikk guy! He might be involved with the Shockrilla!"
"And do you have any evidence?"
"Yeah! Is spied on him all sneaky-like, and he said some really mean things! He was going to do something horrible to Mr. Wally!" Numbuh 3 then had an epiphany. "Hey, he has the same name as Numbuh 4!"
Mordecai raised an eyebrow. "Who?"
"No one important I bet," Vegeta muttered. "Where's Pikk now?"
"In that tent," Numbuh 3 replied while pointing.
Immediately, Vegeta dashed to it. Many of the workers were startled by his sudden appearance.
"Hey, you can't just-!"
Vegeta simply ignored them and went in anyway. To his surprise though, Pikk wasn't there. Numbuh 3 and Mordecai were next to arrive, but they were also disappointed to see nothing.
"He's gone!" Numbuh 3 cried.
"Are you sure your story was correct?" Mordecai asked.
"I swear! We gotta do something fast!"
"Don't bother," Vegeta said rather condescendingly. "There's no need to go on a wild goose chase when our beast of burden can just come to us. Luckily, we know an easy way to lure him out. After that, I'll finish the job."
XXXXXXXXXX
"Wowee!" echoed Bloo. "Now that is a big foot!"
"You're not funny," Courage muttered.
"What did I say a joke?"
Bloo, Blossom, and Courage were inside the abandoned mines, staring at an enormous footprint in the moderately dark environment, illuminated only by some light from the entrance.
"Courage, where does the trail lead now?" Blossom asked.
Courage sniffed and gulped. "The scent goes deeper in…oooooooh why did it have to be here!"
"Keep going Courage. We're right behind you."
The trio were blazing on the trail. passing by old mining equipment and tunnels that led to other places. As they went further, the mines became darker.
"Ugh it's so dark," Bloo muttered. "Imma light a match."
Blossom's body jolted after she heard those words escape from Bloo's lips. Somehow, Bloo had a box of matches on his person. Before he could light even one, Blossom grabbed both of his hands and gripped them tightly.
"OW! What gives!?"
"What's wrong with you!?" Blossom hissed. "There could be dangerous chemicals in the air!"
"So what?"
"If you light this match, this centuries-old working hazard could go kaboom! That's why I asked you to bring the flashlights, which you clearly don't have. For the love of…why didn't you bring them!?"
"For the record, I did bring them after you told me to in the rec room!"
"Ok, then where are they?"
"Uh…."
XXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile at the Tiki Bar…
Zeff was currently looking at a set of three flashlights on the counter. "Huh…wonder who left these here?"
XXXXXXXXXX
"You see I did take 'em," Bloo began, "To the tiki bar…"
Frustrated, Blossom frowned and closed her eyes. "It's ok. I have something just for this scenario." After a few seconds, Blossom's eyelids flew open and were emitting a bright, translucent light.
"Did it just get bright in here?" Courage turned around to see Blossom's powers in full display.
"Woah!" Bloo exclaimed. "You're like a human flashlight!"
"Thank you for your acute observation. Now let's keep moving."
As the three pressed onwards, they caught sight of an abundance of strange carvings on the walls.
"Sheesh someone must love drawing," Bloo muttered. "…hey this reminds me of that one show!"
"The wall carvings?" Courage asked.
"No all of this! This whole scenario reminds me of this cartoon I watched. These four kids and their dog would go out and solve mysteries and stuff. I guess Courage fills in for our dog, Vegeta is the guy who eats a lot kinda, Mordecai can also fill in that role too, Blossom's the nerdy one, Numbuh 3 is the ditzy one, and I'm the leader with all the plans."
"Get real," Blossom groaned. "Your personal character profile is the guy no one likes, but everyone is too self-conscious to simply waive you off."
"Hey, they had a character just like that in the show too! He was the dog's brother or nephew or something."
"You don't say? Sounds like we really are in this show of yours."
"See I told ya...wait! Why do I have the feeling you're messing with me!?"
Blossom turned her head and formed a cheeky smile. "Whatever do you mean? Can't you take a compliment, Bloo?"
Courage snickered as he continued to lead them deeper into the mines.
Minutes passed, and the three made it to an interconnected web of tunnels and mine tracks. Courage stopped in his tracks, attempting to pick up on the scent again. Blossom and Bloo also stopped to survey their surroundings.
"Imagine how it must've been back in the day," Blossom speculated.
"I wonder what they dug for," Bloo questioned. "Probably gold.
"Hey, Courage! Something wrong!?"
Courage scrunched his nose and groaned. "The scent leads there, and there, and there, and there, and…"
"AIEEEEEEEE!" screamed Bloo.
"What is wrong with you!?" Blossom snapped.
"Shine your eyes here! You're gonna want to see this!"
Blossom shrugged and reluctantly directed her eyes towards a spot Bloo was pointing at. With a clear view, Blossom found a sparkling object that was gold in color and amorphous in shape.
Courage's eyes widened. "Is that-"
"GOLD!" Bloo immediately jumped towards the pile and hugged it tightly. "This is the best day ever!"
"Bloo, that's not gold," Blossom said bluntly.
"Huh?
"That's amber. It has a beautiful color though. You should keep it as a souvenir."
Bloo picked up a batch of the substance and stared at Blossom in disbelief. "What are you some kind of expert? Yeah, I don't think so!"
"Believe what you want to believe Bloo. Now let's hurry up and find the correct path. Maybe there's some footprints lying around."
"There are footprints everywhere," Courage noted. "This guy really gets around."
Bloo groaned and decided to find something else to do. Holding onto his prize, he strolled towards a minecart he would claim as an emergency bed. Unknowingly, he also brushed past a switch that caused the nearby tracks to switch. Immediately after, he jumped inside and laid on his back. Unfortunately for him, the cart started moving down the tracks and into a tunnel.
"Uh oh," Bloo mumbled. "Hey! Could use a hand here!"
The cart drove out of sight, leaving Courage and Blossom utterly flabbergasted.
Blossom groaned and picked up Courage. "C'mon! Let's go!" Blossom flew after the cart and quickly caught up to it. Once she confirmed Bloo was inside, she decided to tail it.
"Any minute now!" Yelled the impatient Bloo.
"I know, but would you learn anything if I did?"
"I learned you're a horrible person and you suck at rescuing helpless people!"
"You're so kind."
Courage's nose twitched and he yelped, "Guys, I'm picking up on the scent, and it's stronger!"
Bloo let out a proud laugh. "Well, well! Looks like yours truly saved the day. Without me, you wouldn't have found the correct path."
"Good job Bloo," Blossom praised. "You somehow pulled your weight without even trying. I'm genuinely impressed. Way to go!"
"You bet I did! Full speed ahead!"
…
Sometime later, the trio finally reached a dead end. They were in luck though. The tracks led them to another cave opening. Strangely enough, there was a carving on the side next to the entrance.
"Home sweet home," Blossom read aloud. "That's odd."
Courage shook in fear and hid behind Blossom. "H-h-h-he's in t-t-there, a-al-r-right!"
"Time to give ape face one nasty eviction notice!" Bloo exclaimed. "C'mon!"
"Hold it Bloo," Blossom warned. "This doesn't feel right."
Bloo groaned. "Arghhhh, what is with you!? You want to give up when we're so close!?"
"No that's not it! I just used my X-ray vision…and I don't see any lifeforms."
"So what? He's not home!"
"Which means we better hurry before he does come back. C'mon, guys let's have a little look inside."
"Oooooooh, I just know something bad is gonna happen, or my name is Jim the Simian," Courage complained. "And it's not."
While exploring the peculiar cave, they stumbled upon various unusual objects. A clay pot contained a golden fluid while more from the ceiling dripped slowly, stone furniture resembling chairs and beds, an improvised kitchen and bathroom, and other peculiar items that did not seem to belong to a den of a bloodthirsty monster.
"Am I the only one weirded out by this?" Bloo asked.
"You're absolutely not," Blossom replied.
"Oooooooohhh!?" Courage moaned with fear.
"What's wrong Courage!" Blossom exclaimed.
"B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-"
"Ball? Basket? Brisket?" Bloo guessed.
"B-b-b-b-b-b-bb-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-"
"Banana? Bread? Banana Bread? Billy? Bouncehouse?"
"B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-"
"Blueberries? Bald Eagle? Buttermilk? Blue Whale? Beetles? Bloo?"
"B-b-b-b-BONES!"
Courage was staring at a pile of bones neatly packed on one side of the room.
"BONES!?" Bloo cried.
Blossom quickly ran over to inspect the unsettling sight. "Hold on…these are animal bones…and these resemble wings."
"Yeah!? Sooo!?"
"I think these are bat bones. That explains his food source I guess but-"
"Hmmmm!?" hummed a mysterious voice.
Bloo, Courage, and Blossom turned around and jumped back. Standing before them was the sasquatch they were looking for. Instead of letting out a roar or pouncing on them, Sasquatchanakwa attacked them with a big toothy grin and a nonconsensual wave.
"AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Courage and Bloo shared an ear-piercing scream that echoed throughout the mines. For added cowardly effect, Bloo jumped into Courage's arms.
What was keeping Blossom from freaking out was Sasquatch's behavior. Sasquatchanakwa had a confused look on his face and was scratching his head. He looked over at Blossom and gave her the facial equivalent of a shrug. Blossom put her hands up and shrugged back at him.
"Well, this wasn't on my bingo card," Blossom joked. "Hey guys."
"AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
"Um…guys?"
"AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
"You can stop…oh never mind." Instead of using her voice, Blossom extended her hands out for a moment before performing a mighty thunderclap. The resulting shockwave echoed and was loud enough to block out Bloo and Courage's screaming. "Do I have your attention now?"
Bloo and Courage were silent and shared a brief moment. Courage stared at Bloo and the other did the same.
"Ehehehehe," Courage awkwardly chuckled.
Embarrassed, Bloo hopped out of the dog's arms and looked the other way.
Blossom sighed and turned to face the sasquatch. "Hi, Mr. Sasquatchanakwa. Do you know anything about a guy who looks like you but also shoots electricity?"
"No as a matter of fact," he said in a very deep but slightly regal accent. "And please, call me Sal."
"Sure thing Sal. Now could you-wh-wh-wh-WHAT!?"
"Was that not the answer you were expecting?"
"I didn't know sasquatches could talk," said Bloo.
"And I didn't know amorphous blobs could talk," Sal retorted.
"…touché"
"Besides, I couldn't always speak like you...I want to say humans, but I'm not sure how to generalize it. Moving on from that tangent, this is just something that…happened."
"Ah-ha!" Blossom gasped with excitement. "And let's say the power to shoot lightning out of your hands happened as well!"
"No that's crazy, but I could try." Sal stuck his hands out and made weird finger motions. "Hmm…nothing. Welp, sorry I couldn't help you. Now if you please, I need to eat. I'm having bat stew tonight."
The trio expressed their disgust by sticking out their tongues and delivering a loud "Bleghs!"
"Don't judge me! It's a living…and hey! I remember you!"
"Me?" Bloo asked.
"No, the dog! You gave me a heart attack!"
"You gave me a heart attack!" Courage yelped. "Why did you sneak up on me like that!?"
"Well excuse me for asking for some food!"
"All you wanted was food?"
"Why yes! You think I like eating bats all day?"
"Well, uh, do you?" Bloo asked.
"NO! That was rhetorical!"
"Wow, looks like he's even smarter than you," Blossom joked.
"How about you bury yourself in a hole!" Bloo shouted.
Blossom responded by sticking her tongue out.
"Aside from that, the only delicacy around here is the stuff that drips from my ceiling."
"What delicacy?"
Sal pointed at the golden liquid dripping into a clay pot.
"How can you drink that?" Blossom asked with disgust.
"It has quite a tangy taste to it. I believe it's mostly insulation, but it has an old vintage."
Blossom's opinion hasn't changed one bit. "We gotta get you some real food."
"So, what do we do now!?" Bloo yelled. "We said we'd get Shockrilla, but this guy is clearly not him! I'm not even sure if he's a sasquatch…he kinda looks like a wuss."
"Don't test me," Sal warned.
"Whatever! I guess we should just bring him back with us to show those construction dopes that they're crazy."
"Actually, that's not a bad idea," Blossom praised.
"Huh?"
"C'mon Bloo it's simple. At least he's not to blame. We could probably convince Wally that someone else is the suspect."
"Why would I be a suspect?" Sal questioned.
"It's a long story. You with us?"
"If I can get proper food…yes please, and maybe a new home too! My current way of life is just so depressing!"
Blossom nodded in approval. "I feel ya, big guy. Don't worry, we'll find a way to get what you want."
Sal had a very hopeful smile on his face. He then faced Bloo and brought his attention to the golden object he was carrying. "By the way blue man."
Bloo frowned. "It's Bloo."
"Forgive me, Bloo. I must ask, why are you holding amber?"
"It's gold! It's gold and it's mine, so keep your grubby hands away from it!"
XXXXXXXXXX
As Blossom's group was racing back to the resort, Numbuh 3 was ordering the workers around so Vegeta could enact his master plan.
"So, what we want you to do is keep working and we'll bag ourselves a Shockrilla," Numbuh 3 explained. "Any questions?"
"Yeah," said Alfonso. "How are you gonna capture it?"
"What's a Shockrilla?" asked another worker.
"Why are we taking orders from a ten-year-old with a stupid hat!?" screamed yet another worker.
"Just so you know, I turned twelve a few weeks ago," Numbuh 3 happily answered. "Don't worry though. Me and my friends got it covered. Just make sure to make it look natural!"
"Well, um….ok?" Alfonso grimaced.
…
About ten minutes later, the crew was hard at faking working. Numbuh 3 watched from the sidelines with her very own Rainbow MonkeySuper Jungle Safari Goggles.
"No signs yet…huh?" The girl in green caught sight of a peculiar scene. Electricity was once again coming out of one of the vehicles and naturally, the Shockrilla manifested on the spot. "Oh! Shockrilla's here!"
Immediately there was a frenzied panic amongst the workers. Despite this being the third time Shokrilla attacked, it wasn't getting old.
Shockrilla roared and before he could even attack, Vegeta instantly appeared above the beast and delivered a weak elbow drop (by his standards). Despite its classification, the attack was powerful enough to knock Shockrilla out cold.
After the attack was over, many of the workers emerged from their hiding spots to see the result.
"Hey, that guy with the spiky hair killed him!" one worker rejoiced.
"He did it he's a hero!" said another worker.
Vegeta scoffed at the praise. "Oh give me a break. This is pathetic."
During the so-called celebration, Numbuh 3 slowly sauntered on over to Vegeta. She didn't seem thrilled by the outcome, nor did she show any emotion at all. She simply gave Vegeta a blank stare.
Vegeta felt the girl's eyes on him and looked back at her. "...what?"
"That felt very anti-climactic Vegeta."
Vegeta gritted his teeth and raised his brow. "Do you want me to pointlessly drag this out or something!?"
"It would've heightened the suspense, yes."
"We're not here for your viewing pleasure! What kind of fool fumbles a plan just for their own satisfac...ugh never mind!" Vegeta bashfully looked away for a few seconds, recalling events from his past. He then looked back at Numbuh 3 to see her judgemental stare once again. "...stop looking at me like that!"
"I also wanted to say you went a teensy bit too far."
"Do you have any idea what I'm truly capable of!? Just be glad I didn't smash his br...my apologies. I got carried away and forgot you're an adolescent."
Numbuh 3 raised an eyebrow. "What? Were you gonna say you could've smashed his head into a thick, mushy, ewwy, gooey paste while painting your fist and the dirt with his blood? And then while you look at the mess you made all you can think is...why?"
Vegeta's eyes widened with shock and confusion as he gazed at Kuki with a slacked jaw. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. In a trembling voice, he asked, "This seems very unlike you. A-are you sure you're actually Kuki?"
Numbuh 3 closed her eyes and smiled. "Yup, it's me! While I don't care much for violence, don't think I'm so naive kid either! I've played a lot of zombie games in my free time...just don't tell my parents."
Stupified, Vegeta blinked thrice before he chuckled aloud. "You sure are full of surprises. Anyways, it's about time we tell Mordecai to bring in the cage."
"Right!" Numbuh 3 took out a Rainbow Monkey Friendship and Love Walkie-Talkie. "Mordecai! Bring the crane!"
…
Five minutes later, the once menacing Shockrilla was now unconscious and trapped in a metal cage; away from any electrical device.
"Now that's what I call a monkey in a cage," Mordecai quipped.
Vegeta groaned at the joke.
"What? You got a problem with monkey jokes?"
"As a matter of fact…never mind."
"Fellas!" Bloo cried from afar.
Finally, out of the mines, Blossom arrived carrying Courage, Bloo, and the newly acquired Sal.
"Is that who I think it is?" Blossom asked.
"Shockrilla in the flesh," Mordecai answered. "You wanna explain the other sasquatch-sized elephant in the room?"
"I'm Sal," Sal answered. "Also known as Sasquatchanakwa to…almost everyone."
Numbuh 3 got a good look at Sal and then proceeded to survey the sasquatch in the cage. "So then who's that guy?"
"Yes, who's that guy?" Wally exclaimed while arriving at the scene.
"Hey, everyone's conveniently here now," Bloo noted.
Vegeta busted the cage open and grabbed the limp Shockrilla. After inspecting him, he realized, "This is a sasquatch suit. There's even a zipper."
"Shocking!" Bloo cried.
"And offensive!" Sal roared. "He looks nothing like me!"
"I don't know it's very authentic," Wally commented. "Also who-"
Blossom quickly interrupted the man. "Sasquatchanakwa. We call him Sal. Let's get back to what's important. So if that's a suit…who's under it?"
"Hm, this looks like a mask so…" Vegeta grabbed the top of the mask and pulled it off. "Huh?"
The culprit was none other than, "SPIDER-MAN!?" Everyone was certainly shocked.
"No!" Vegeta yelled. "He's just wearing another mask!"
Vegeta ripped off the mask and everyone was stunned to see that it was, " !?"
"Called it!" Bloo yelled.
"No, you didn't!" Courage barked.
"Let's be real, he was one of the only guys with a stake in this who had a name."
"But why Cutter!?" Wally sniffed.
With all eyes on him, Cutter…...didn't give an answer. He was still out of commission.
"Maybe we should wait for him to wake up before we send him to the authorities," Mordecai said.
"There's always the cold water technique, Mordecai," Blossom noted.
…
After one rude awakening by bucket of ice-cold water, Cutter was awake and gasping for air.
"Where am I!?"
"You're busted, mister!" Numbuh 3 taunted.
"Wh-?" Cutter looked down and noticed he was in his suit. "Oh God Dammit."
"Now that he's awake, ahem….why Cutter!?" Wally cried out.
"Easy, he wanted to frame Sasquatchanakwa so he could get rid of him," Blossom proudly answered.
Cutter raised an eyebrow. "What? No!"
"Ok, now I'm lost. Why did you go around dressing up like a sasquatch?"
"That beast was only a scapegoat for my true plans, to slowly ruin you Wallace! Wallace was spending money like a madman! You're always renewing shows, making strange deals, and doing unnecessary crap like this! Why do you want to renovate a resort you recently built!?"
Wally scratched the back of his neck. "Because…I can?"
"THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD!"
"So why were you attacking other people if Wally was the dude you hated?" Mordecai asked.
"The ruin his name of course! Anything I do to ruin the name of the greatest media distributor in history can go a long way. Besides, Wally's already involved in a few scandals himself. I don't have to mention what happened with Chris."
"That's true," Wally admitted. "Still how did you do all of…this?"
"I could explain that," Blossom chirped. "Vegeta, could you remove his suit?"
"Only if he's wearing anything underneath all that," Vegeta muttered.
"Boxers and a wifebeater," Cutter grumbled.
"Good enough." Vegeta picked up the overweight man and held him upside down. Through some strange physics, the man slipped out of his suit quite easily.
"Hey, those are Rainbow Monkey Boxers!" Numbuh 3 cried with excitement.
"Um…it's a gift from…my daughter…"
Blossom flew over to the suit and took a good look. "I see. This is a modified ElectroMorphic Suit. Using nanotechnology and advanced energy storage systems, he was able to harness electromagnetic energy and shrink himself to move through objects. He also has built-in specialized conductive materials and integrated energy weapons. That's how he does his shock blasts."
Everyone else found the explanation to be…jarring.
"Blossom," Mordecai began, "That makes no sense."
Blossom awkwardly rubbed the back of her head. "Sorry, I was kinda winging it there. This is future tech I'm dealing with. Maybe Mr. Cutter can explain all this."
"Nope," Cutter bluntly answered. "I just bought it from some guy. I have...connections."
Wally raised an eyebrow. "For how much?"
"Um...a lot of money."
"So let me get this straight," Bloo started. "You got mad at Wally for wasting money, but you did the exact same thing just to get back at him?"
"I'll be honest with you," Cutter began, "I really, passionately, fervently, devotedly haaaaaate Wallace."
"Urk!" Wally recoiled in shock and held his chest as if he was heartbroken. "That hurts man!"
"So does this mean this case is closed!?" Numbuh 3 asked with anticipation. "I don't think I like this hat very much."
"Yes," Blossom answered. "Yes, it is."
Numbuh 3 tossed her hat into the air and jumped with joy. "Hooray!"
Cutter groaned. "Whatever. I would've gotten away with it if it wasn't for you meddling kids, a grown man, an anthropomorphic bird, a blob thing, and your stupid dog too."
"Ehehehehehe," Courage snickered.
"Awww someone's salty," Wally teased. "Good job you six. You saved my butt. Now all I gotta do is send this snake to the slammer. Now what to do with Sal here?"
"Hey, how about he lives with us!?" Bloo exclaimed.
"Huh? Also, why are you carrying amber?"
Bloo simply ignored that comment. "Have you ever lived in a mine Mr. CEO sir?"
"Can't say that I have."
"Well, it gets pretty lonely at times. I think Sal here would appreciate the change of scenery if you let him."
"Hmmmmmm, Sal how does this sound to you?"
Sal clasped his hands together and begged. "Oh anything, please! The only thing I can do is draw!"
Wally smiled and happily shrugged. "How could I say no to that? Sal, by the power vested in me you are now an official Playa Des Losers Dos resident. That comes with full access to everything on the island of course."
Sal immediately rushed over to hug Wally. "THANK YOU SO MUCH!"
"Ooh." Wally awkwardly hugged Sal back. "Uh…ok. Now if you excuse me I need to get going to a business trip off-planet concerning a show I greenlit."
"Um…Mr. Vasey!" Alfonso called out.
"What's good Alfonso?"
"A few of my men found the flight crew tied up in one of our tents."
"Say what now?"
Just then, the starship's engines took off and began its ascent into the atmosphere. It was quite a sight to behold unless you're Wallace Vasey and are pretty ticked off.
"How in the-"
"The culprit also left this." Alfonso handed Wally a note.
"Kiss my ass…from Pikk." Wally groaned. "Well played."
XXXXXXXXXX
Up in the ship, Pikk was having the time of his life. As he manned the ship controls, he was playing the song Freebird on the ship's stereo. Once the song got to the main guitar solo, he began to laugh uncontrollably.
"NEXT STOP THE EDGE OF THE UNIVERSE!" Pikk boomed with joy. "I'M RETIRING EARLY! HAHAHAHAHA!"
XXXXXXXXXX
A few hours later, everything was relatively back to normal. Wally was currently stuck on Strandopolis until further notice. Cutter was taken by the planet's very own Costal Guard to a temporary cell before his trial. Alfonso was now the new Construction Manager, but nothing seemed to have changed for him.
Over by the Tiki Bar, Vegeta, Courage, Numbuh 3, Blossom, Bloo, and Mordecai were enjoying a relaxing evening after all the work they did. Accompanying them was Sal too. The ambiance of the crashing waves along with Caribbean music from a speaker, made for a soothing atmosphere while enjoying drinks.
"What is this Bloo?" Sal asked.
"Only the greatest combination of fish, veggies, sauce, and a flour tortilla!" Bloo hyped. "The tuna wrap!"
Sal took a bite of it and was easily won over. "Incredible! This is much better than bat stew!"
"Excuse me?" Zeff said with astounding awe.
"It's a sasquatch joke," Bloo chuckled and lied.
"Sasquatch jokes must not be very funny because I don't get it," said Numbuh 3.
Blossom was busy discussing what transpired earlier with everyone else.
"You know maybe that Cutter guy was right," said Blossom. She stirred her smoothie mindfully with a straw as she expressed her thoughts. "I mean Mr. Vasey does go a bit overboard from the looks of it."
"He's weird, but I think I can trust him," Mordecai added. "So far he seems like a guy who just has too much fun."
"Besides it's best not to look a gift horse in the mouth," Vegeta muttered. "As long as he continues to benefit me, I don't care."
"That's very superficial Vegeta," Blossom scolded.
"Oh, drop it." Vegeta huffed and took a swig of his protein shake.
"No, I won't. Call it a hunch, but my experience with this sort of thing is just telling me something's off."
"Eh, that's not so important," Bloo dismissed. "What is important is that I learned something today."
The others looked at him with a mix of disbelief and genuine curiosity.
"You're joking," Courage blurted out.
"Actually I did. Throughout the trials and tribulations, despite everything I knew before, during, and after I met you guys…I realized something…"
Blossom was quite interested in hearing what Bloo had to say. From the sounds of things, this might be the start of some meaningful self-reflection. "Well? We're waiting."
"…that even the most successful Harvard graduate can be the dumbest person in the room."
Numbuh 3 tilted her head with genuine befuddlement. "Huh?"
"That's it?" Blossom groaned. "I was hoping for something along the lines of you realized how meaningful it is to work alongside the people who surround you."
Bloo awkwardly shook his head. "Not really. The only other thing I got out of this was gold a new friend who's a talking yeti! Not an imaginary one, a real one!"
"First of all, I prefer the term sasquatch," Sal corrected. "Secondly, I don't know if we're close enough to call each other friends yet."
"In due time my yeti friend. In due time."
"Hey!" Sanji just left the kitchen to hang around by the main bar area. "You fellas wanna hear about this time I got trapped in a whale!?"
"Like Moby Dick?" Blossom muttered.
"Shouldn't you be cooking, eggplant head!?" Zeff snapped at the younger cook.
"C'mon old man it'll be fun. So the four of us…"
XXXXXXXXXX
As Wally made his way through the dark and eerie mines, he found himself in the company of a mysterious man who had been absent for some time. It was Master Tokoyami, a figure shrouded in mystery and intrigue. Wally, never one to shy away from adventure, carried a cage containing a pet hamster and a trusty flashlight to guide their path. Together, they explored the depths of the mines.
"Why did you call me here Wallace?" the old master asked.
"Because you're my friend," Wally happily replied. "And friends show each other cool things, no?"
"Stop dancing around the subject and tell me."
"I originally was just gonna up and leave once I met the losers and construction was underway, but I found something very interesting. Today I met a sasquatch who could talk, but here's the weird part. My new Sasquatch friend wasn't able to talk, or had advanced intelligence, the last time I saw him here."
"Go on."
"So, I figured something must have caused this transformation, and that's why…"
Wally and Tokoyami were now standing at Sal's previous home.
"…we're gonna do a little snooping around."
As Wally and Tokoyami stepped into the dwelling, their eyes were immediately drawn to the bizarre sight of a thick, viscous liquid dripping slowly from the ceiling. The liquid was making a soft pattering sound as it landed in the clay pot that belonged to Sal. The room was silent except for the sound of the dripping liquid, which was creating a sense of unease for Tokoyami, but this also filled Wally with childish glee.
"Oh! Now I see!"
Tokoyami scrunched up his face. "What is that filth?"
"It's clearly Sal's pitcher, dude. He must have been drinking this stuff for who knows how long. Something tells me it's what gave him his newfound intelligence."
Wally took the hamster and dunked it in. As he performed the act, his eyes showed a glint of a very dangerous curiosity. After fifteen seconds, Wally brought the rodent back up and it was covered in the golden fluid, dripping as it tried to regain consciousness. Once it did, the hamster began to check its surroundings and even looked at its own body. Overwhelmed by its newly discovered sentience, it began to let out a disturbing human scream before eventually passing out due to shock.
"Coooooool."
Tokoyami was slightly disturbed by the whole string of events. There was some part of him that regretted coming here. "Looks like you were correct in your assertion," Tokoyami said. "But where is this coming from?"
"Dunno…buttttt it would be a good investment to our cause, eh? We could get a team to discreetly excavate our miracle elixir. I'm sure the seven of us could find some use for this stuff."
"For once I agree with you."
"For once I agree with you. Dude, you've agreed with me a bunch of times. I'm not asking for pity here, but a little respect would be nice."
Tokoyami groaned. "For now, let's just pack this substance and take it back to Uka. We'll need to go over this with Aku before anything else."
Wally gave Tokoyami a wink and a thumbs up. "Got it. Let's bounce, Toko. Caves like this make me a bit claustrophobic.
"I'll keep note of that the next time you piss me off." Tokoyami didn't say another word and began to leave.
"Heheh, you joking right? Right?"
And that's a wrap.
Hopefully, this was a fun little chapter. I found it to be quite awkward to finish because coincidentally another TD fanfic author just released a chapter with Scooby-Doo references. Though really, I found it funny how that happened.
Anyways for anyone who wants a bit of lore info, this story takes place on the same day Mushy attacked. So even the former campers had an eventful day, although theirs were arguably better than the current ones.
Now that this is done and over with, I can now start working on Episode 9. So, see ya next time :)