2

I now think Rika and Eriol breaking up is actually not that bad. We're a week away from Rika to leave to Europe, and the Amamiya girls have been spending a lot of quality time together. We do the grocery shopping together, we go shopping to the mall together, we walk around the town's central Park (Penguin Park) together.

This night, after doing a picnic at the park, the three Amamiya girls agree to eat ice cream. There's a tiny stall that's located right next to the bridge that crosses Penguin Park's river, that has the best ice creams of all town. They're mine and Misaki's favorite.

Misaki asks for a raspberry cone, Rika gets a mint choco, and I chose cherry blossom flavor, and as the sun sets, we sit in a nearby bench, to simply watch people walk and the sun set. I don't know if it's because of my name, but I love everything that's cherry blossom related. The tree we had sit across, for example. Or the ice cream I'm eating right now.

"I bet Europe doesn't have cherry blossom ice cream." I say out loud.

"I think so too." Rika replies.

"You won't be able to eat one until Bon Festival*."

"Christmas." She corrects me. "Bon Festival is too short for it to be worth it to fly fourteen hours, back and forth."

"Bon Festival's going to be a mess." Rika growls.

I want to growl too, since Rika's words have hurt me. How can she even think Bon Festival is not worth it? Plus, we've never celebrated Bon Festival without her. She's the one in charge to prepare mom's offering, and set the altar. Misaki's the one in charge of cleaning mom's tomb. I have no idea how to turn on the fire for mom's soul to go back safe and sound to the spiritual realm. And both our grandmas will be there. Is one of the very few opportunities mom's family meets up with us, all so we can remember her…

Suddenly, I'm having an anxiety attack, and I find it hard to breathe, and I suddenly don't care about cherry blossom trees or ice cream. I can't imagine Bon Festival without Rika. I can't even imagine next Monday without her. I know most of the sisters are not that close, but I'm closer to Rika than anyone else in the whole world. How can we be the Amamiya girls without her?

We're back at home just in time for dinner. Dad's the one in charge of cooking tonight, so it's our turn to set the table. Misaki loves to do it since that means she's in charge of placing everything as millimetrical as she wants it. She's a bit perfectionist, maybe too perfectionist for her age. Misaki steps down from the car (we can walk to Penguin Park, but Rika loves driving), and walks inside the house as fast as she can, which means she didn't see Eriol who just walked out of his house, probably towards the conbini store, to buy something his mom needed for dinner. I'm about to raise my arm so to say hi to him, when I see he turns around and walks away. And then, a lightbulb turns on in my head.

"Rika." I say when my older sister stops right next to me. "Have you said something to Misaki or dad?"

"Something about what?" She asks back, as she plays with the keys.

"About Eriol. Have you told them you guys have broken up?"

"I don't think they need to know." She replies, as I frown.

"I think they own that. Plus, they will figure it out sooner or later, especially when he's not there to say goodbye to you at the airport, or when he no longer comes home to hang out…"

Rika doesn't answer me. She just walks towards home, leaving me alone. I look her walk away, and so I proceed to look at the street, where now I can only see Eriol's silhouette, getting further and further away.

Rika leaves tomorrow. Misaki and I are helping her to pack her suitcase once again, as dad is busy doing what he refers to "late spring cleaning", just now when the summer is about to end. I think that's the way he shows he's nervous about Rika leaving us.

We're packing Rika's suitcase again, not because she asked for it, but because Misaki and I insisted: she wants to spend a little more time with her oldest sister before dad sends her to bed, and I because was thinking to ask her to lend me some clothes I wished I could wear this year at school.

It's already night, and since it's the last night that Rika will spend at home, we have decided the three of us will sleep in her room. Her bed is big enough for the three of us, especially since Misaki doesn't take that much space. Just as always, Misaki is the first one to fall asleep. I have no idea how she does it, tonight I just can't fall asleep. Just the idea that in 24 hours Rika will be at the other side of the world, is too much to bear. I hate changes more than anything in the world, and this is one of the hugest changes in my life, right after my mom's death.

"Sakura…" I hear Rika's voice at my side. Is barely a whisper. "Have you ever been in love? Truly in love."

Her question comes out of nowhere. I have no answer ready. I haven't even had the opportunity to think about the question and thus my answer, when Rika keeps on talking.

"I wish I had fallen in love more than once. I think that, for a high school student, the right thing would be to fall in love at least twice."

This time, she sounds melancholic. I wonder what's in her head, what she's thinking that she's not planning to tell me. Or will she? But then, I hear her sigh, weakly, and then, silence.

Just like that, Rika has fallen asleep, as she usually does. With such an ease that intrigues me.

I wake up in the middle of the night, and thanks to the moonlight that slides through the curtains, I can see someone's missing from the bed. Rika's not here. Misaki's next to me, curled up, taking the minimum space as always, and further away, there's only darkness. I look back at the window, wondering why the curtain looks half open. Then, moving slowly in order not to wake up Misaki, I look out of the window. And there they are: Eriol and Rika, standing at our house driveway.

Rika tries not to look at Eriol. She prefers to look to the sky, the moon, actually. Neither of them try to get close to the other one. They don't touch. There's not a single caress of their fingers, much less a hug. That distance that lies between them can only mean Rika hasn't changed her mind.

I step away from the window and the curtain, and go back to my place at the bed. Misaki's still curled up so I lay next to her. I wish I didn't see any of that. It was too personal. And too real. It was a moment that should belong only to them. I wish I could forget it.

But it seems I can't stop thinking about it. Lying next to Misaki, I can't help but think: what would it feel to have a boy that loves you, to the point he'd cry for you? The worst part of it all is that we're not talking about a random boy. It's Eriol. Our Eriol.

Is there, in that moment of solitude, that I think about Rika's question. And the answer finally comes to me. Yes, I've been truly in love. Although it has only happened once. I've been in love with Eriol.

Our Eriol.

Bon Festival*: I'm not sure if it's a wide spread festivity, or how important it actually is, but it's what fitted the best (speaking of dates in the calendar, not theme) as a counterpart of Thanksgiving, which was the festivity refered in the original book.

XOXO, Ribo~