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Ascended, the aerial Angel hovered beyond the bench's rail, in front of the Messiah crumpled over in slumber.

"Shinji-kun," said Kaworu, slowly reaching out a hand towards the ruffled hair on the back of the boy's head. "I know you've always wondered about the true reason behind my drastic measures, actions that impacted so many Lilins…and you with them. Now…"

A bestial, triumphant yet agonized, thundered in the stormy backdrop. The sound did not wake Shinji, but did cause a crystalline drop to fall upon the back of Kaworu's raised hand. It took the Angel a moment to realize that to be his own tear, and that he had—in spite of believing himself unmoved by his earlier clash against his human donor—been crying.

The hand retracted, with the impending contact left unmade.

"…it's time." He spoke on in that low, tremor-tinted murmur likely audible only to himself. "I fear to tell. I've been holding it back so long…"

"Did she really…what's she, crazy?!" exclaimed Kensuke, giving voice to what many of his gathered classmates were currently thinking as he kept his (metaphysical?) camcorder trained at Asuka's distant, visibly struggling figure increasingly obscured under the ominous LCL rain coming from where the SEELE members were currently brewing into one monstrous-seeming collective. From beside him, a visibly worried Hikari leaned closer against Toji, who, too, was glaring into the orange storm.

"That Soryu, she actually ignored NERV's instructions to gather at the lectern, but instead decided to go rushing into the SEELE storm," mused the rugged teen, grudging respect apparent in his voice. "Wicked."

Unnoticed by the engrossed friends and their classmates, the 'Rei' guard standing outside the witness box too observed this startling development with red eyes wide with childlike wonder.

"The Second… she dare to brave this storm for Ikari-kun."

"Asuka is right.

"I was the one who pushed a reluctant Shinji-kun back into his EVA right after the Dummy Plug maimed the Fourth Child. Sure, I did it to prevent the Fourteenth Angel from ending the world, but a part of me also wanted to use the continued progression of Ikari Gendo's scenario to gain a better handle on his collaboration with SEELE.

"I, a coward who couldn't even withstand basic military torture without pathetically snitching on my gang, and had let everyone die…I actually had the gall to force a fourteen-year-old kid to fight some city-destroying monster that had just beheaded and maimed two other Evangelions right there and then.

"I'm…the worst."

Kaji's admission, coming in that gritted derisive tone belying shimmering self-loathing, grated at Misato's hearing like a saw to her heart. Having moved off to the side and further into the shady murkiness encasing their surroundings, the man stood with his back to her in that rigid, pained stance she was only too familiar with—it was the very physical expression that had repeatedly prompted her empathetic younger self to comfort him with sex, after all.

At the height of their young love during college, he had revealed to her bits of the horrific events he went through as a Second Impact orphan: how he had joined a teen street gang after fleeing an overcrowded youth shelter ruled by abusive staff, how their survival dependant food theft at a military camp ended up with everyone but him murdered for sport by fascist post-Impact Japan's power tripping soldiers. Just some old scars from the Impact, he used to say of these tragic fragmaents he would sometimes tell her about in the aftermath of their passion, his cool fingertips brushing against the marking marring her heated chest and torso. Time would teach them both how mental scars were often not just scars, but festering wounds that would ultimately consume the person afflicted. The reason why they pushed each other away that first time? Second Impact. The reason why they lived the lives they did afterwards? Second Impact. The reason why they both got themselves killed in the end? Second Impact….

"We all of us here are accomplices in coercing the boy into continuing to pilot EVA," said Misato, with you're not alone as we all share in this massive pot of collective guilt being the unspoken message she hoped to convey to Kaji. To her dismay, Kaji did not budge from where he remained facing away.

"Not just to have him 'save the world', but also to suit our own agendas…" muttered Ritsuko, now hovering precariously over the edge of the lectern platform's solid fence, looking down. Misato found it unsurprising, considering how the woman once traumatized an innocent Shinji with the Dummy Plug's horrific reveal in retaliation to what Ikari Gendo did to her.

" 'Cowardly adults pretending to be the good guys'…that girl totally called us out," Misato murmured under her breath, prior to pulling herself together out of sheer necessity to speak up aloud. "What we owe Shinji-kun, we never could pay back in full; but the least we could do for him now is to shelter him from further harm. Like…" Glancing over to the monstrous silhouette gaining definition underneath the orange tornado rushing around its massive form from where it now drafted the entire prisoner's dock area, she took a breath before voicing the important question. "Why is the burden of fighting SEELE on Shinji-kun, when we now know it is Ikari Yui—whom we can communicate with directly in Instrumentality—who actually controls Unit 01?"

To that, Ritsuko let out a bitter snort. "Because Ikari Yui, like my mother and your father, is an active accomplice to the Seventeenth Angel, who is insistent that Ikari Shinji become mankind's Messiah aka role model. Remember? The angel said that he planned for Shinji-kun to become the 'Messiah' to lead us all to get over our Hedgehog's Dilemma, which I suppose is important for when we resurrect to our new physical bodies after leaving Instrumentality. This means he is adamant in showcasing Shinji-kun as some sort of heroic legend to the watchful masses within this Seed Body." Her voice darkened a further notch. "Ikari Yui obviously supports the Seventeenth's current decision to have Shinji-kun judge and fight SEELE."

"…even knowing how her son would be further traumatized and hurt," commented Kaji, voice low with awe and also melancholy. "I suppose I'm out of touch with how mothers can be like…been too long since I've had one."

"Ikari Yui…" Listening to Ritsuko and Kaji—both possessing deeper knowledge over this woman than herself—had Misato clenching her teeth at the naivety she just displayed with her question. Indeed, just because Yui is Shinji's mother doesn't she would be easily persuaded to spare her son the pains of piloting EVA. Most parents harbor ambition for their children. Like people pushing their kids to painfully hard for supposedly brighter future prospects, Yui could indeed be all-to-willing to put Shinji through a lot more soul-crushing trauma just so he could attain what future glory she had planned for him. "Will she truly pull no punches even when it comes to her own son?"

"This is a woman who had, in all likelihood, planned her own absorption into Unit 01's core just so she could have a hand in controlling Instrumentality," stated Ritsuko, perfectly phrasing the grimmest part of Misato's realization about said person. "We can be sure what love she has for her son falls into the 'tough' category, further evidenced by her holding Unit 01 back earlier on and letting the MP EVAs kill Asuka to Shinji-kun's further traumatization." Something seemed to have occurred to her then, as her ironic half-smirk gradually tightened into a deep frown. "In that same vein, I do wonder if Soryu Zeppelin may also have a hand to play in her daughter's brutal demise?"

That abrupt speculation had Kaji turning around wide-eyed, and Misato letting out a deep grunt of frustration.

"Not now, Rits. " The NERV Major pinched at her nose ridge hoping to stop a headache that somehow still managed to develop despite her supposedly being goo now. "This tactical brain can only dissect one problem at a time when in this hive mind limbo. Let's just focus on the one momster we want to convince to fight SEELE without further involving Shinji-kun—"

TICK!

Like an outage ending, artificial lights flashed on with disorienting abruptness, shattering the illusion of the 'lectern' and revealing from around the stunned trio a setting of utmost familiarity to them.

"…looks like Asuka is also right on this count…"

One moment, the girl was struggling to swim through a turbulent, malevolent sea. Next, an oval dome of a dry space abruptly expanded from around her, push back the surrounding storminess and giving her some much-needed room to breathe.

"…an A.T. Field umbrella?" gasped Asuka, staring wide-eyed at this newly-appeared individual currently raising such an eerie "item" over both their heads. "…Wondergirl…"

It was indeed Ayanami Rei, or at least one of the multiple forms of her present on site. Donning the Tokyo-3 Junior High uniform the "real" her was most often seen wearing, this Rei faced Asuka with this wistful, understanding look in her red eyes that made Asuka felt strangely, uncomfortably naked. Asuka found herself shying away from that probing gaze, having grown sullen from embarrassment.

"W-Who told you to do this?" she spat out, trying to affect the caustic tone she so often used when dealing with her rival pilot. "The Commander? No, can't be: that monster couldn't care less for me or anyone else at NERV, including his idiot son..." An unpleasant realization came to her then, prompting her to face Rei anew. "That idiot Shinji…you're doing this because of him, aren't you?!" She had to strain to refrain from pointing a finger right at the other girl's otherworldly albino face, to at least not look the part of the stereotypical jealous bitch losing her man. "That's right…being Lilith means you get to have him all to yourself now. Why how lucky for you! So, do you pity me now? Just because you think I lost—"

"I envy you, Second."

Rei's words, so softly spoken, stopped Asuka's tirade with perhaps more effectiveness than any physical blow could. The redhead was left agape, allowing for the other to continue her piece.

"Unlike Brother and myself, you share the same world as Ikari-kun…the world of humans born to the warmth of mothers."

Still holding up the "umbrella", Rei sent, with her free hand, another A.T. Field cutting open the space to Asuka's side. Yelping, Asuka stumbled a step backwards to see this space portal opening up, gained definition, before finalizing its form into one that the redhead well-recognized.

It was that doorframe, beyond which her then clinically insane mother had so briefly lived before suiciding, beyond which the post-Instrumentality mother she rejected had again—

"You mustn't run away," said Rei, stopping Asuka before the redhead even had the chance to succumb to her basest fear and do just that.

"A-As if I would!" spat Asuka, struggling but failing to keep her teeth from making those unbecoming clanging sounds as memories assailed her: Mama, whom she found hanging by a rope ten years ago; Mama, whom she found hanging by a rope here within Instrumentality just now—

"I... I can't do it," mumbled the redhead, head down, ashamed of each and every word now escaping her damnable mouth. "I thought I wanted to find her again, but…no. To see this doorframe again, beyond which Mama…I just can't. I just can't look at Mama through that goddamned door!"

"Second—"

"No!" Asuka cut Rei right off. "If it means I'm going to hurt her further, or even push her towards death for real, then I won't go see her no more! Someone like me…I've been terrible to that idiot and Misato too. There isn't a shred of goodness in me! Only cowardice masked under false bravado! Who am I to judge Mama for destroying Father, especially when she seems to be doing it to protect me?! If I can only hurt Mama by being this awful self, then I'd rather not do anything at all!"

A moment of wordless silence followed. And then…

"I'm not going to pity you, Second," stated Rei, the even tone of her voice making her words all the more condescending.

Livid, Asuka turned to snap at Rei: "Who needs your—" And she stopped at what she saw.

A red line, hair thin yet still apparent, was slowly cutting a horizontal line across the side of Rei's pale neck.

"You can see it too, can't you?" said Rei, noticing how Asuka had noticed. "The cracks opening up across Lilith's Seed Body, currently mirrored upon my form."

"Wha…?"

"With SEELE's collective exuding an A.T. right inside Lilith in their quest for rebirth, it will only be moments before this Seed Body is to crumble and die…and all those not yet able to regain physical forms by then shall die along with it. These lives shall experience true, final death, with no further hope of resurrection for any of them."

"No way…" gasped Asuka, horrified to notice another red cut now appearing along Rei's exposed arm, and was slowly growing longer. "If this is true…then what's gonna happen to you?"

"What becomes of Lilith, so too I shall be," replied Rei, her tone matter-of-fact.

"…just how much of a goddamned doll are you?" asked Asuka, scandalized by Rei's lack of self-preservation. "You're talking about yourself dying like it doesn't matter!"

"I've been aware of this possible outcome since before I joined with Lilith, my very origin, by my own free will," said Rei, as thought that was explanation enough for her current calmness. "It is futile to dwell upon what cannot be changed, and my impending death should matter little to you." She gestured towards the door. "Soryu Zeppelin-san's future, on the other hand..."

"You—"

"Time is running out, Second. If you cannot summon the will to reach out to your mother even now, you really might lose her forever to an Instrumentality tumbling down."

The two locked gazes—icy reds against fiery blues—but for a moment, before Asuka slowly relaxed her defensive posture and turned to again face that ultimately unavoidable door to her dreaded, hidden truth.

Of course she would not run away now. Mama, who loved her even as Unit 02, who also destroyed her deadbeat father and evil stepmother in the name of protecting her…she must meet with Mama again, and see with unbiased eyes Mama's true, unfiltered self. Only then would she know whether Mama's maternal love for her was real; only then would she know whether she was ever loved—truly, unconditionally loved—by anyone...

…only then would she ascertain if her disappointment-laden life was still worth facing.

The door slowly creaked open to reveal a fiery crimson glow; no, she mustn't run way.

Rei's voice turned softer; more gentle. "Beyond that door lied the resolution you need for moving on. Go, reclaim the warmth you thought was lost."

"Geez…you're really something," Asuka forced out a disdainful snort even as she wiped away a stray tear under the guise of flipping back her hair. "Either you don't talk at all or you talk all corny."

"Afterwards, with your conviction and strength renewed…hurry and go back to Ikari-kun."

Rei's last request—coming from her perceived rival of all people—had Asuka whirling towards her. "W-What're you say—"

…just in time to see the albino's pale flesh started melting off one of her legs as though she was made of wet dough.

And, during that moment of horror and distraction, Asuka had since gotten pushed through the dreaded door by Rei's extended palm.

"Rei!" exclaimed Asuka, calling the other girl by name for the very first time as she struggled to regain her footing within the crimson place (Mama Space!) she now found herself in. The door between them had since begun swinging shut; like in a nightmare, Asuka found herself somehow unable to stop its steady momentum. "W-Wait! Your leg-"

"I'll do my part to uphold the Seed Body." Brows creased in apparent effort, Rei leaned downwards to physically roll her sagging flesh back over her exposed leg bone as though adjusting a lax stocking. "Hurry and find resolution with your mother…before it all comes tumbling down!"

"You…" Asuka's voice came out choked by what sounded suspiciously like a sob. "What the hell are you saying about me and that idiot!?"

"You need each other," stated Rei, glancing up to offer the stunned Asuka a startlingly complex smile of warm—even somewhat playful—endearment. "Never forget this, Idiot-Asuka."

And the door closed completely, blocking Rei's smile from Asuka's view and separating the two girls now in their two worlds.

"REI!" Asuka pounced a fist onto what once was a closed door, now but a blank wall red as her mood. "You…you're the idiot here." Eyes stung by unwanted wetness into squinting shut, the girl leaned her forehead against the cold, unyielding wall. "Who told you…who even need you to frigging defer to me, huh? And when you're frigging dying?! How could you…how dare you, you arrogant little…!"

"…Asuka…?"

The familiar, tentative voice from behind her forced the hysterical girl to compose herself—to the best of her ability—before turning around to face her very origin with open, unflinching eyes.

"I'm back…Mama."

. . . to be continued?

Notes: Sorry about the long wait, but real life has taken its toll on both my write time and creative energy. Thanks for still reading & please continue enabling me with c&c as the next chapter is packed ;-)