Submitted for The Houses Competition Forum - Round 4
House: Ravenclaw
Subject: Prefect
Category: Standard
Prompt: [Restriction] Word count: 1968 words; [Action] Planning a party
Word count: 1,968
Warnings: Muggle AU
Choose The Right Cake Or Die
"I swear to God, if you suggest we hire a stripper one more time, I'll punch you in the nuts and you'll never have kids," Lily threatened, and Sirius had never been more in love with her than at that moment.
Sirius and Lily, alongside their friends, were at his flat, planning a party for Remus' birthday. James was the one who kept suggesting a stripper, and it looked like Lily was about to explode.
Sadly, the threat of bodily harm wasn't enough to stop James from trying to get his way.
"But why not, Evans? Remus is the one who needs some loving, and since none of us is offering him love the way he deserves, I think we should give it to him as a gift on his birthday." James was smiling cheekily, while Sirius feared for his best friend's safety.
"Do I need to ask how you know any strippers, James?" Alice asked, and Sirius had to muffle his laughter from trying to escape.
If Lily didn't kill him, Alice would. James should have thought better before suggesting a stripper in front of his girlfriend.
"Whaaaat? I don't know a stripper personally, Allie-cat; that would be preposterous," James said, putting his hands on his chest as if he were clutching his fake pearls while trying to sweet-talk Alice, but by the look on her face, it wasn't working.
"You better hope you don't know any stripper personally and only wonder how you would go about hiring one, or else I think you will just love sleeping on the couch until Remus' party." Alice glared at James, while Sirius had to slap his hand over his mouth to stifle his cackles.
"Can we please focus? Remus' birthday is in two weeks, and we don't have anything done," Mary said, stopping Alice from scolding James any further. "Lily, do you have the checklist? I think we should see what we need to do and—"
"Divide and conquer? I like that idea," Lily said, interrupting Mary, who just smiled at her.
Everyone knew Lily was a little control freak when it came to planning, but if she wasn't like that, Sirius knew they would never get anything done.
It wasn't the first party they were planning together, but the last time someone had tried to plan a birthday party, there wasn't cake, but it had too much booze and someone had ended up in the bathtub.
Peter's twenty-fourth birthday had been amazing.
"I know I'm probably going to regret this, but Peter, do you think you could take care of the cake? With James' and Sirius' help." Lily was staring at him with a little grimace on her face, but Sirius didn't feel offended.
Sirius knew it was difficult to plan a party; a surprise party would be even harder especially when the birthday boy was one of Lily's best friends. They were never able to keep secrets from each other, and Sirius feared Lily would babble about it.
"I love how you volunteer me to do stuff without me even saying anything," Sirius drawled just to see Lily scowl at him.
"You say that as if you don't like her bossing you around," James piped in. Sirius knew exactly what he was going to say even before he opened his mouth. "I know you like when she gets all bossy in bed and makes you do that thing you—"
"Okay, James! Shut up!" Sirius yelled, throwing himself at his best friend and almost slapping him in his attempt to make him stop talking.
"So glad to know Alice isn't the only one who overshares," Marlene said, and Sirius and James both turned to glare at her. "What else do you have on your plans, Lils? Anything to lower the tension in this room."
"I'm still waiting for the three stooges to agree they'll get the cake." Lily was glaring at them now, and Sirius winked at her. "Stop trying to flirt your way out of this, Sirius."
"We can get the cake, Lily, don't worry. I'm not sure about James and Sirius, but I know I can get the cake on time." Peter was such a suck-up, but Sirius knew he was just trying to appease Lily—not that he was complaining too much.
"Why do people insist on accepting things on my behalf? I'm a human being, you know?" Sirius complained, but everyone pretended they hadn't heard him. "Fine, keep being like that and see if I still hang around all of you."
He slouched in his chair, pouting when the others still acted like they were ignoring him.
"You still would because you love me," Lily said as she approached him and settled on his lap. She ran her fingers through his hair and teased, "You can't live without me."
Sirius kissed Lily's lips quickly before smirking at her. "That's very true. Want me to send everyone away so we can be alone?"
"Although it is very tempting, we still need to finish planning Remus' party." Sirius pouted, but Lily kissed it away. "After we're done? That's a whole different story."
"Let's get this planning wrapped up, people! My beautiful girlfriend wants to get frisky with me as soon as all of you are out of our hair!" Sirius yelled, making everyone around them groan.
"Sirius!" Lily practically screeched before slapping his chest. "For the love of God…"
"How hard can it be to find a bakery that sells triple chocolate cake? And one that takes requests a little over a week and that writes a personalised message on top?" Sirius asked the next day as he walked around the neighbourhood with Peter and James.
The planning for Remus' party had continued for over two hours—hours Sirius could have spent with Lily in their bedroom, but he wasn't going to complain about how his night had ended.
"I'm still surprised Lily trusted the three of us to get the cake," Peter said, glancing at the stores around them. "Isn't the cake the biggest part of a birthday party?"
"It's almost like Lily was trying to get rid of us while they managed the rest of the party without us there to cause havoc," James said before he stopped walking altogether. His eyes widened. "Wait, you guys don't think that…?"
"Nah, Lily is an evil genius when it comes to planning, but she isn't going to be like that with Remus' birthday." Sirius was looking at his friends, trying not to panic. "I mean, it isn't like we have ever given her reason to worry."
"Except we totally did," Peter said before he motioned to a bakery across the street. "Let's go check that bakery and see if they have what we're looking for."
The three men took a deep breath when they entered the small bakery. Freshly baked biscuits, warm scones, and delicious pastries welcomed them with open arms. They were already salivating at the thought of eating anything prepared in the bakery.
"Well, hello there. How can I help you?" A voice stopped their daydreaming, and they turned to focus on the woman at the counter.
"Hi, we need to order a cake for our friend's birthday, and we're hoping you can help us with it." Sirius gave the woman his best smile, the one that made Lily fall in love with him—or so he claimed.
"What type of cake are you looking for?" the woman asked, pulling out a folder from under the counter. It was thicker than any folder Sirius had ever seen. "We make all types of cakes here; I'm confident we can find something for your friend."
"He likes chocolate, and we thought about getting a triple chocolate cake. With something written on top, so he'll know how we all love and cherish him," Peter said, approaching the counter.
"That's so sweet of you," the woman cooed at them, and something in the glint in her eyes should have made Sirius afraid. "What do you want written on the cake?"
"How about 'Moony, you're the moon of our eyes. We love you to the moon and back.'" James was grinning so wide that Sirius wondered how he hadn't hurt himself.
"We are not writing that on the cake! The girls will kill us!" Sirius hissed, knowing full well the wrath of his friends—and Lily would probably lead them.
"What do you suggest then, oh-wise-one?" James' voice dripped with sarcasm, but Sirius didn't let it bother him. After all, it was just James.
"Why are you asking me? Aren't you the one who claims to be the brains of our group? Use that to think of something!" Sirius knew it was childish to be arguing over what to write on a cake, but he and James couldn't help it.
"You two are the reason why I see my therapist twice a week," Peter mumbled under his breath. He turned to the woman. "Do you have any suggestions? If we leave it to these two, we'll never leave."
The woman chuckled. "I think I have an idea of what I should write. I just need the name of your friend."
"Remus, his name is Remus," James answered before turning to Sirius. "It's best if we use Remus instead of Moony, right?"
"Yeah, I think it's best." Sirius nodded, glad they had managed to get the cake done without any incident. "Let's get this over with as it's the last thing on the list we need to do."
After finishing ordering the cake, the trio went to find a birthday gift for Remus, hoping the cake would turn out the way they envisioned.
"You guys shouldn't have done so much for me," Remus said, looking at his friends gathered around him.
Remus' party was going smoothly, everyone was having a blast (Sirius could see why Lily was such a control freak when it came to planning such a wonderful party).
"Stop protesting and enjoy." James was wrapped around Alice but gave Remus a pat on the back. "Wait until you see your cake."
"Yes, the cake." Sirius chuckled, exchanging a glance with James. "It's the most beautiful cake in the world."
"What the hell did you two do? Should I be worried?" Remus narrowed his eyes at them.
"We didn't do anything," Sirius said, smiling sweetly at Remus. "The baker, on the other hand…"
From the kitchen came Lily's outraged cries, and they all ran to see what had happened.
"You three had just one simple job, and that's what you get?" Lily demanded, pointing to the cake.
Instead of a simple birthday message or even the corny ones James had suggested, the cake now read:
Remus, you're our moon: we rotate around you. Love, your friends.
"This doesn't even make any sense! The moon rotates around the Earth, not the other way around!" Lily's face was becoming a lovely shade of red and her eyes turning to slits; Sirius thought she looked really hot.
"It is better than the cheesy lines James was suggesting," Peter said before looking at the cake. "Still looks delicious. Is it time to cut it already?"
"I think that's a great idea, Peter; let's go!" Remus said, smiling brightly before picking the cake up and walking towards the living room.
"At least Moony's happy and that's all that counts, right?" Sirius asked, pouting and giving puppy eyes at his girlfriend, who just stared at him before shaking her head in exasperation.
"This is the last time I let the three of you be in charge of something so important," Lily mumbled, trying to disguise her laugh even if she failed horribly.
"Don't worry, Lilypad, the next birthday is yours, and you can plan to your heart's content." Not letting her reply, he just swooped in and kissed her.