Present time

When Alan returned to the inn, he looked ready to bowl over. Zana hurried to him and took him by the arm. "Mothers, Alan, you look terrible! Sit down, I'll make you some tea."

"I just had soup, I don't think I want any more liquid right now," Alan murmured, but he sat down on the chair with a heavy thump.

Zana hovered by his side, her hand resting lightly on his shoulder. She very much wanted to ask him what had happened at that Chimp's house that had left him in such a disheveled state, but Alan wouldn't tell her without patient prodding, and that needed time she sadly didn't have right now.

"Did you find the human who had Peet's knife?" she asked instead, and sat down across from him.

Alan nodded. "He's the leader of a gang of street kids - and a tough negotiator. I had to buy the answers to my questions about Pete with soup and meat. And I had only enough sembles to pay for one question."

"What did you learn?" Zana asked, worried.

"That Pete was assaulted by three apes." Alan tiredly rubbed his neck. "They knocked him out and dragged him away with a bag over his head. They way the boy described it to me, Pete had no chance. He never even saw them coming. They jumped him from above."

"Who took him?" Zana clenched her fists under the table. "Bounty hunters? Urko's men? Or these criminals who use humans for illegal fights?"

"I don't know," Alan said, looking even more tired than before. "I didn't have any more sembles left to buy me another answer."

"You'll get more," Zana promised, and rose from the table. Then she hesitated.

Alan was pale and… haggard, as if had lost weight during those three days. Hadn't they fed him? What had they made him do? He looked completely wrung out, and Zana didn't like the way he was avoiding her gaze. It reminded her too much of the way Peet had avoided looking at her and Galen, after they had rescued him from Urko and Vanda.

It reminded her of how she herself had wanted to curl up in bed and just... vanish, after that terrible incident in the ruined human city. How she hadn't wanted Galen to sit at her bed and hold her hand, or touch her at all. Or talk to her.

I really shut him out completely. And then I complained when he retreated into the taverns of Sapan...

"You know I've been searching for Peet nonstop since he vanished," she said, "and I'm the last person to take this lightly, but you won't go back to these street humans right away. You'll lay down and get some sleep. At least for two atseht. It'll still be light outside when you wake up again, but you need some rest. What in the white wastes did they do to you there? I've never seen you so... distraught."

She saw his adam's apple jump as he swallowed. He still didn't meet her eyes. "I'm fine. I've been working overtime before, I can power through. And for Pete, time is of the essence."

Stop avoiding me!

Zana drew a carefully measured breath. Patience, she reminded herself, patience and persistence... and subtlety are the keys to this stubborn human's secrets.

If only I had the time for them now!

Aloud, she just said, "Yes, it is - and if you break down in the streets, or get assaulted like he was because you're too tired to notice the danger, we won't have won anything, and neither will Peet. Once we know where he is, we need to come up with a plan anyway. So be sensible and go to bed, or do I have to order you to go?"

Alan drew a slow, measured breath and leaned back in his seat; then he looked up and finally met her gaze, and Zana was struck how cool and detached he seemed all of a sudden. It reminded her yet again that Alan had been a soldier in his own time - and a man who made his own decisions.

"I appreciate your concern, Zana," he said. "Really, I do. But I know my limits, and I won't break down in the streets. I'm not that exhausted. I can get all the sleep I need once we've found Pete. I've made a connection with these kids; I need to exploit that as long as it still exists. In their world, promises are quickly forgotten."

With a last worried glance at him, Zana went to get him more money. "Will you talk to me when this is over?" she asked when she gave him the money pouch.

Alan had already risen and was halfway to the door. He took the pouch from her hand and smiled down at her, and Zana was struck by the sadness in his eyes. He softly touched her cheek.

"You're a good person, Zana," he said quietly. "Such a good person. It... keeps me from despairing over your people." He let his hand fall to his side. "But there's nothing to talk about. It was hard work, but now it's over. And I want to focus on finding Pete, and then on finding a safe place for you to settle down."

Zana felt her throat constrict with emotion, an answering sadness to the one she saw in Alan's face. "For me?"

Alan smiled his faint smile. "For you and Galen."

"What... what about you? And Peet?" For some reason, Zana had always seen them together in that house they would buy. All four of them. Even though she knew how desperately Alan wanted to go home, to his own family.

But hearing him say it was different. Maybe she shouldn't have asked.

"You know we... I can't give up searching for a way home," Alan said, and now his gaze turned inward, as if he was reviewing something painful. "I need to... be sure that there really is no way home for me anymore. And Pete said he'd come with me." He smiled wryly. "Said someone needs to keep an eye on me."

"And if you don't find a way," Zana said, fighting to hold back tears, "will you come home to us then?"

"If I'm absolutely sure that there is no way back for me," Alan said hesitantly, "then I'll be grateful that someone has made a place in their home for me."

Zana sniffed and patted his arm. "Well, see that you get all the answers from those street humans this time." She turned her back to him and shuffled to the stove to make herself some tea. She couldn't look at him right now, or she'd start sobbing like a little girl.

She didn't turn around until she heard the soft click of the door.

Galen tried not to calculate how much of his money was left after he had commissioned twenty 'wanted' posters with a local 'artist', on top of the 'missing human' ad that had already cost him over seventy sembles at the Herold the night before. He had been able to push the price for the posters down somewhat by claiming that the sketch didn't really resemble Peet - and it didn't; the hair was too short, then too long, the lips too full - but his money pouch was noticeably lighter all the same now.

In a way, Galen mused, it was only fitting that they used the money that Alan had earned with so much pain and humiliation on finding his friend now, and not for themselves. It was the only thing that somehow justified his magnificent blunder.

He was so engrossed in his thoughts that he collided with full force with a human turning the corner. The scrolls in his arms tumbled on the cobblestones as he felt the human's hands clasp around his arms to keep him from tumbling after them. "I'm sor... Galen?"

Galen looked up from the scrolls to his feet to Alan's face. The human was still pale, the fur that he and Peet usually insisted on scraping off shading his chin.

"Alan," Galen said weakly. "I'm sorry, I didn't pay attention to where I was going..." He quickly bent down to gather up the scrolls.

Alan crouched down and picked up one of them. He raised his brows when he opened it and saw Peet's picture. "A 'wanted' poster?"

"A 'missing human' poster," Galen corrected him. "There is a difference."

"You put out a reward," Alan murmured, scanning the scroll.

"Well, most people don't go out of their way to help others, until it helps them in return." Galen gingerly pulled the scroll from his hands. "Where are you going? You... should get some rest."

"I'm not tired." Alan's face was devoid of expression all of a sudden. "And I have a lead I want to follow."

Galen felt the intense urge to apologize profusely for hiring him out to Ramor, but a look in Alan's face let the words die in his throat. Now was not a good time.

"A lead?" he said instead. "That's good news. It... it is good news, isn't it?"

"I can't tell yet. I hope so." Alan rose with him and handed him the rest of his scrolls. Galen nodded at him, feeling incredibly awkward, and made to move around him and towards the inn.

Alan's hand on his arm stopped him. "Galen... I'd prefer it if you didn't tell Zana what happened at Ramor's estate."

Galen gaped at him. "You know Zana - do you have any idea what she'll put me through?"

Alan's face was an impenetrable mask. "I can't say that I give a damn. I don't know if this was your way to get even with me for what happened to her in those ruins..."

"No, it was nothing like that," Galen protested. "I had no idea-"

"... but you owe it to me to keep silent about this," Alan continued, talking over him.

"She'd hold me responsible for what happened anyway," Galen said weakly. "It's not as if I'd be eager to tell her. But she's very tenacious." Like Ann, he added silently. Great Cesar, was it right what some Orangutan priests claimed, that you married your parent, in a sense?

"Sooner or later, she'll dig out the truth," he added. "If not from me, then from you. Don't underestimate her."

"I don't." Alan's face softened almost imperceptibly. "But right now, we don't need any distractions."

"I agree." Galen sighed deeply. "I'll try to stay out of her sight as much as possible. Which reminds me," - he lifted his load of scrolls a bit - "I could actually start pinning up these posters now, instead of doing it after lunch, as I'd planned..."

Alan smiled thinly. "That's a good idea."

"We should maybe come back here at the same time," Galen said nervously. "Zana will probably not grill me when she could as well grill you."

"I don't know when I'll be back," Alan said absently; his gaze was distant again, as if he was already planning his next move. "It depends on how productive that lead is."

"Well, I, I'll wait in that little pub down the street after I'm done," Galen suggested. "From there, I can see you when you return."

"You do that." Alan pushed past him.

"Alan!" Galen waited for him to turn around, but the human just stood there, waiting with his back to him. Galen sighed, and walked around him so he could look into his face.

"I swear to the Mothers, I had no idea where I was sending you," he vowed. "And had I known, I'd never have made that deal. I was furious at you after what happened in the ruins, and I had every right to be. But I'm not... not that depraved... You must believe me."

Alan regarded him for a long moment. "It doesn't matter anyway," he said at last. "It happened, whether by intent or not, just like... just like what I did to Zana, and you. It can't be undone... I'm still sorry about Zana." He dipped his head and started walking again.

Galen stared after him until he had vanished into the crowd.