There's a stillness in Kristina's bedroom that reminds her that time's moving way too fast and way too slow. She shifts around in bed, gentle yet sluggish as she buries the side of her head in her pillow. Her morning sickness is practically gone now, but the nausea and lethargy remain. She lazily rolls onto her back, groaning as her eyes flutter open.
"Ugh…" she rubs her eyes, blinking until her vision clears. She takes a few deep yet quick breaths, mentally composing herself before attempting to sit up. The sound of metal clinking against itself tugs at her ears, and she manages to sit almost completely upright just as her bedroom door opens.
"Good morning," Molly chirps quietly, a bowl in her hand, "How'd you sleep?"
"Meh," she utters, a hand on her forehead.
"Meh? That's not good."
"I've had better nights," she responds as Molly sits down on the edge of the bed, placing the bowl on the nightstand, "When did you get here?"
"About an hour ago. Amy let me in before she left for work."
"Did she," Kristina stretches her arms upward, "And how many times has this happened now?"
"Every week since you announced it to the rest of the family, and you're…what, about four months along now?"
"You'd know better than me. I haven't been keeping track," Kristina drops her arms and looks over at the bowl, "What's that?"
"Oatmeal."
"For me or you?"
"You can have it if you want."
"No thanks."
"Oh come on, Krissy," Molly rolls her eyes playfully, "Oatmeal is already vegan. There's nothing 'weird' or 'gross' in it, I promise."
"Okay," she takes the bowl and scoops some oatmeal into her mouth, "...You win this round."
"Good," Molly claps her hands together, moving closer, "So, what's the plan for today?"
"Well, I work the lunch shift at Charlie's-"
"I thought Phyllis was giving you time off."
"My hours were cut back to accommodate the pregnancy. I don't mind it, but it keeps me from making the money I need to pay my half of the rent."
"Can't Amy cover it until the baby's here?"
"I'm not going to make her do that."
"But-"
"Molls, I can't stay home all the time, okay? I know you want me to, you really, really want me to, but that just doesn't work. I like going out and working and just living my life."
"...Okay," Molly's mouth hangs open as she processes Kristina's snappiness, "but you have another life to think about. A potential life, anyway."
"And I do. Phyllis has me strictly supervising, making sure all orders are correct and training any staff that needs it."
"Good," Molly says. Kristina turns her head to roll her eyes before turning back, "but I still think you could be doing something different. I mean, with all the alcohol and mix of foods, which could come out raw-"
"Molly," Kristina shoots her a sharp glare, "come on. I'm not actively eating or drinking anything over there."
"I'm just looking out for you-"
"You mean you're looking out for the baby."
The sisters exchange a stare, the silence between them serving as an affirmation. They glance away, each looking down at their laps.
"Um…" Molly clears her throat, "how's your youth center going?"
"How do you know about that?" Kristina questions in kind.
"Mom…may or may not have mentioned it in passing."
"Of course she did," the elder sister sighs, "Well, construction crews are in the middle of refurbishing the building I picked out."
"What's going to be part of it?"
"Anything teens could need: workrooms, hangout spots, and that's besides their own rooms, clean bathrooms, a state-of-the-art industrial kitchen."
"That's a lot; you're doing a lot of good here."
"Well, every teen deserves a good home, a place they can go to feel safe and loved. If I can provide that for them, then I will. Doubly so for LGBTQ kids. I'm lucky enough to have parents who accept me, but other people aren't, and I want to fix that."
"That's very noble of you, Krissy," Molly pulls her in for a hug, "You have my full support."
"Thanks," she gives a half-hearted smile before taking in another spoonful of oatmeal. It drops right back down into the bowl.
"What's wrong?" Molly asks.
"Tastes like cardboard."
"Do you want something else?"
"Chocolate."
"That's not exactly healthy."
"So? I need something sweet and it sounds pretty good right now."
"I can go get some vegan chocolate. It's made with hazelnut-"
"Ugh, no," Kristina snaps, "nothing vegan."
"You need to eat healthy for the baby-"
"And chocolate isn't going to do anything bad."
"Can you at least eat some fruit or vegetables with it?"
"Ooh," there's a sparkle in Kristina's eyes, "Chocolate-covered carrots. Or chocolate-covered tomatoes."
"...Okay," Molly sighs, shaking her head as she gets to her feet, "I'll go to the market on the corner and get some. I'll be right back."
"And I'll be here," Kristina watches her sister exit the bedroom, the front door closing in the distance. She slowly stands up herself, exhaling as she rises from her bed. She rummages through her dresser and then her closet, searching for a workable outfit until she settles on a pair of black leggings and a flowing white blouse. Her full body appears in the standing mirror nearby, and every part of her freezes. The clothes end up on the unmade bed as she continues to stare. A hand runs down her torso, smoothly over the Volonino's sweatshirt hiding the growing bump. She turns to her right, doing the same. Sadness creeps in from the corners of her mind, pulling at her just as she lifts her top just enough to see the bump itself.
You're growing, she thinks to herself, you're safe, and you're healthy. I can't ask for much more, can I?
She bites her lip the more she stews. Dex's face flashes in her mind for a brief second, the guilt from it lasting far longer. She moves her hand in a gentle circle on her bare stomach as she thinks of how nice it'd be for Dex to feel his baby and how he should be here for his baby and how he deserves to know that it's his baby she's carrying-
"Kristina, I'm back!"
She jumps when she hears Molly's voice and instantly composes herself. She gives a somewhat forced smile as she walks into the living room, watching her sister set the bags down on the bar counter. Molly pulls out a clear bag of carrots, long and a ripe orange, as well as a jar of chocolate spread.
"Thank you," Kristina opens the jar and dips the sharp end of the carrot in. Her tongue retreats the second she tasted the spread, "Ugh, Molly!"
"What?"
"Hazelnut?! I told you not to get me that!"
"Kristina, you need to eat healthy food," Molly's tone is stern, "and that includes healthy alternatives."
"I have carrots-"
"And that's not enough! I get you're going to have food cravings, however weird they might be, but there's always going to be a healthy alternative that fits what you need."
"But I don't want a healthy alternative! Why can't you just let me eat what I want?"
"Kristina-" Molly takes a breath, "I'm not going to have this argument with you."
"Oh, really?" the other woman crosses her arms, "Molly, I know what I signed up for when I agreed to do this, and clearly," she gestures down to her bump, sloppily covered by her sweatshirt, "things are working out so far. You don't need to hover like this."
"And why should I trust that?" Molly's fists land on her hips, "You know as well as I do you have a tendency to be a bit reckless and impulsive. You can't do that here. You're having a baby, you're nourishing a potential life-"
"I know that!"
"Then act like it!"
"I am-" Kristina runs her hands past her face, "I understand that I can be a bit flaky from time to time, but I know what's important and what's not," she rests her hands on her bump, "There's nothing I've done that's put this baby in danger."
"So far," Molly crosses her arms, "I know you, Kristina, and minimizing your behavior doesn't change anything. Need I remind you that this baby isn't yours-"
"Stop," Kristina's voice slightly cracks, "My pregnancy isn't high-risk; I don't need you dictating what I can and can't do. I don't need you trying to force-feed me vegan food, I don't need you practically keeping me on house arrest, and I certainly don't need you acting like my worth is tied to your motherhood."
"You are carrying my baby!"
"And it's my body!"
The women stand firm, firm scowls on their faces. Silence grows between them, the minutes passing them by with ease.
"You know what," Molly breaks the tension ever-so-slightly, pulling out her cell phone. She swipes a few times and presses down, the device ringing a few times.
"Hey, baby," TJ's voice comes through the static, "I'm on shift right now; is everything okay?"
"Hey, yeah," she looks at a still-perturbed Kristina, "I just have a question for you."
"What is it?"
"I'm trying to get Kristina to have healthy alternatives for her food cravings, but she'd rather have sweets and junk food instead. She also refuses to stay home to protect our baby. I want her to take this as seriously as she possibly can; how can I make that happen?"
"Molls, I get that you want our baby to be as perfect as possible, but you can't make decisions for Kristina. There's a surrogate's bill of rights here in New York, specifically for gestational surrogates, which Kristina is. She's the one who gets to make the health decisions in the end."
"But-"
"Sorry, baby, it's the law."
Molly sighs in defeat, "Thanks, TJ. I'll talk to you later."
"Let me guess," Kristina dons a smug smile as the phone call ends, "I get to make the decisions. Here's what I've decided: I don't want vegan food, I don't want to be kept from working, and I don't want you trying to control my life."
Molly doesn't respond, a hard glare on her face as she grabs her purse and rushes out of the apartment. Kristina shakes her head as the door slam echoes throughout the apartment, fizzling out when she returns to her bedroom, her clothes for the day right where she left them.
"We'll be out of here soon."
Kristina flashes a grin at Sam as she steps into the penthouse. She looks around the living room, admiring the furniture she's come to know so well. Sam, dressed in a sequined black evening dress, approaches her for a hug.
"How are you?" she asks as they pull away, observing the small yet present bump.
"I'm alright," the younger sister responds, "not much to complain about."
"The pregnancy hasn't been hard on you?"
"Besides Molly's annoying paranoia, things're just fine."
"Paranoia?" Sam guides them to the leather sofa.
"It's just…I get that I'm her surrogate, but she comes to my apartment every week and thinks she can tell me what to do. She acts like I'm doing everything wrong; she doesn't want me to work at Charlie's, even though Phyllis cut my hours and has me supervising, and she also wants me to go completely vegan. All I've done these past four months is eat salads and stay inside. If I dare do anything else, she acts like I don't care about the baby."
"Well, truthfully, Krissy, I don't really blame Molly for acting like that: it's her baby you're pregnant with."
"Sam-"
"Hold on," the elder sister holds a hand up, "While it is her baby, it's also your body. I think that as long as you're not eating or drinking anything harmful, what you're doing is fine."
"Thanks," Kristina reaches out for Sam's hand, "I'm glad you see it my way. I wish Molly felt the same."
"She'll come around," Sam says, "She just wants everything to work out."
"Yeah…" Kristina takes a breath, both hands on her stomach, "but that's a talk for another time. Why are you all dressed up?"
Sam laughs, "Dante and I are going out, and we need someone to keep an eye on the kids."
"Not that I'm complaining, because I know those three love their Aunt Krissy, but was I your first call or…?"
"More like third, maybe fourth. We asked Sonny first, but he wasn't home. We then asked Molly, and she said that both her and TJ are working late, which kind of sucks. I wanted them both to kind of get a taste of what to expect."
"Yeah…" Kristina breathes out, "but I'm here, and this can be great practice for me."
"Absolutely. One day you'll have kids of your own."
"Mhm," she tries to beat down the rising sensation of guilt.
Sam cocks her head to the side, "So, how are things going with you? Mom said you're trying to open your own business?"
"Yeah: it's a shelter for homeless youth."
"That's fantastic, Kristina! I'm really happy you're doing that; I know how much you value your volunteer work with the local youth center."
"And now I'm going to have one of my own," a grin of pride surfaces on Kristina's face, "The building itself is being renovated, and I'm going to start looking for some board members: people who can provide proper care for these kids."
"Who have you considered?"
"Terry or Lucas would be great, since I want my center to be LGBTQ-friendly, and I've considered TJ too. I've thought about asking Diane or my dad, even Mom, but I'm not sure yet."
"Here's hoping they say yes," Sam squeezes her sister's hand tight, "What about your social life?"
"What about it?"
"Have you met anyone…special?"
Kristina's mouth opens just as there's a knock at the door. Sam slowly gets to her feet and opens it, Dex standing on the other side. Kristina softens immediately, her cheeks flush and her smile warm.
"Dex?" Sam questions, "What brings you by?"
"Me," Kristina stands up, "Dad assigned him to be my bodyguard."
"Ah," Sam nods slowly, letting the young man inside, "so where you go, he goes."
"It's nice to see you, Sam," Dex nods respectfully before approaching Kristina, pulling into a firm hug. His voice drops to a husky whisper, "and it's very nice to see you."
"It's nice to see you too," she replies, holding him close before letting go. She ignores Sam's intrigued glare just as Dante rushes down the stairs.
"Kristina," he says, out of breath. He buttons up his white shirt and begins messing with the undone bowtie, "Dex."
"Dante," Kristina looks him up and down, "You're looking dapper."
"Thanks. I hope the staff at Beradino's feel the same way."
"Danny, Scout, Rocco!" Sam yells, approaching the stairs, "Can you come down here, please?"
It doesn't take long for the three children to arrive, the boys scrambling down the stairs while Scout takes her time. Wide smiles appear on their young faces.
"Aunt Krissy!" Scout runs past the boys and hugs Kristina's legs. The young woman rests her hands on the girl's shoulders in response.
"Why are you here?" Rocco questions, rubbing the back of his head.
"She," Dante's voice comes from behind, "is going to be watching you guys while Sam and I are out."
"Who's this?" Danny looks Dex over.
"He's her bodyguard."
"Oh wait, you work for Grandpa Sonny, right?" Rocco asks.
"Correct," the young man nods, "Dex."
"We don't need a babysitter," Danny turns to his mother, "Rocco and I can take care of ourselves and Scout. We're in high school, old enough to be home alone. We don't need to be watched."
"Well, to us, you do," Sam replies, "Dex and Kristina are in charge. You do what they tell you, got it?" she then pulls Kristina into a hug, "If you need anything, call me, okay?"
"I will," she waves them off, "Have fun!" she then turns to look at her niece and nephews, clapping her hands together, "Okay, what are we doing first?"
"Tea party?" Scout asks, eyes bright.
"What about a movie?" Rocco offers, "Danny and I recorded that new zombie movie. We'd love to have you watch it with us, Aunt Kristina!"
"But-"
"Oh…we can have a tea party another time, Scout, I promise," Kristina smiles at her before looking at the boys, "You two settle in; I'll get the popcorn."
Scout and Dex watch her walk off just as the boys get comfortable on the sofa. He turns to look at the young girl, catching the sadness in her eyes.
"Hey," he approaches her, dropping to one knee, "Scout, right?"
"Mhm," she hums.
"Do you want to watch the movie?" the young girl shakes her head in response, "Me neither; zombies aren't my thing. But you know what is? Tea parties, and I'd be honored if you invited me to yours."
Her eyes sparkle, "Yeah!"
Dex stands back up, following Scout up the stairs. Once he disappears around the corner, Danny presses play on the remote. A collection of sounds, from the motor of a chainsaw starting up to deep, long groans, fill the living room.
"Guys," Kristina marches up to the sofa, "you're starting without me?"
"We got bored," Danny answers, eyes glued to the screen, "Is the popcorn ready?"
"Almost," she looks at the empty chairs on either side of the couch, "Looks like we're missing two people."
"I think Scout went upstairs."
"And Dex?"
"Don't know, don't care," Kristina scowls at her nephew before turning and walking up the stairs. She hears giggling in the distance and approaches the open door, her heart skipping a beat at the sight before her.
She's not sure how Scout managed to get Dex all dressed up in a sparkly silver tiara and blue feather boa, but she's grateful for it. He clicks his toy cup against hers, both taking fake sips. She can't make out their conversation, getting lost in Scout's warm smile and how fast she's internally melting into a mushy pile. Kristina turns away, back against the wall, a hand on her stomach. She takes a breath, tears stinging the corners of her eyes before going back downstairs. She stops on the landing when she sees the back of Danny's head.
"Rocco?" she calls out.
"Kitchen," Danny says absent-mindedly. She steps down and turns the corner, eventually seeing Rocco in front of the microwave.
"Hey," she says to him, "why aren't you watching the movie?"
He silently stares at her.
"Did something happen?"
More silence.
"Rocco," she steps closer, "talk to me."
"...Promise you won't judge?"
"I promise."
"Well," he clears his throat, "while you were checking on Scout, there was a scene where the lead actress wore this really tight outfit. Danny thought she was hot…and I didn't. I found someone else hot."
"Who?"
"...The male professor."
Kristina blinks a few times, "Oh. Okay."
"Don't tell Danny, okay?" Rocco gently begs, "Don't tell Dad either. I'm still trying to figure it out and stuff-"
"I won't say a word," Kristina smiles at Rocco, "and if you have any questions about liking guys, if you actually do, you can always come to me."
"Thanks, Aunt Kristina," he hugs her before going back to the movie. She feels her stomach flutter, resting a hand on it before joining him.
Hours pass by without a care in the world, and both Dante and Sam return home, paper bags in each one's hand. They laugh as they walk in, turning on the light. The bags end up on the nearby desk, and as Sam goes behind the sofa, Dante stops in his tracks.
"Aw," Dante remarks, looking down at the sofa, "look at 'em. They're kinda cute."
Dex's cheek rests on top of Kristina's head, which lies against the corner of his shoulder. His feet sit on the coffee table while hers are bent at the knee on the leather. Their eyelids are smooth, their faces relaxed as they sleep somewhat upright on the sofa.
"Oh, yeah," Sam hugs him from the side, "seems like the kids tuckered them out. Speaking of…"
She walks up the stars, Dex stirring as she turns the corner on the landing. He rubs his face with his free hand, blinking a few times before looking to his right, "...Dante?"
"Sleep well?"
"Uh…" he clears his throat, "yeah…"
"What happened tonight?"
"Kristina and the boys watched a movie," he scratches the back of his head, "and Scout and I had a tea party upstairs."
"What boa did you get?"
"Blue."
"Nice. She lets me wear that one too."
"Well," Sam's voice echoes down the stairs as she returns to the living room, "the boys are fast asleep," she looks down at Dex, "and Scout wants you to know that she liked the way you read Princess Poppy to her."
"You're good with kids?" Dante asks, raising an eyebrow.
"It's a…hidden talent of mine," Dex replies, a tired yet blissful expression on his face. Sam walks behind Dante and grabs the bags, disappearing into the kitchen. Dante, in turn, walks around the back of the sofa and takes a seat on the chair by the fireplace.
"So," he says.
"So?"
"What's, uh, going on with you and Kristina?"
Dex tenses up immediately, Kristina gently shifting against him with a quiet hum.
"I'm…her bodyguard," the words stumble out of the young man's mouth, "We're…friends."
"Right, but it seems like there's…more. That's what Sam made it seem like; she said your hug looked pretty…intimate."
His eyes sparkle with recognition, an apprehensive confirmation that he's caught. He subconsciously cups the side of Kristina's hand in the palm of his own, the hairs on his arms standing up under his jacket when her fingers gently dance on his skin.
"You like her."
"Is it that obvious?"
"Educated guess," Dante shrugs, pointing down, "You're holding her hand, you're letting her lay against you, not to mention the look on your face."
"She's…" Dex takes a breath, "She's pretty important to me, yeah."
"Is this going anywhere or…?"
"I don't know."
"Really," Dante sits up, his fingers clasped together, "Look, man, as her older brother, I'm not gonna sit here and give you my stamp of approval."
"I know."
"But Kristina is an adult, and if she likes you enough to want to be in a relationship with you, well, I can't do much to stop her, can I?"
Dex gently bites the bottom of his lip, saying nothing. Dante looks him over, leaning back against the chair with his arms crossed. They sit in silence for a beat, Dex subconsciously closing his hand around Kristina's, her fingers haphazardly intertwined with his own.
"She's pretty comfortable with you."
The young man gives Dante a curious look.
"Kristina…she wears her heart on her sleeve. If she likes you, she'll let you know. She'll let everyone know, honestly."
"Oh yeah?" Dex's question comes out as a soft giggle.
"She's a force: a flawed, unpredictable, amazing force. She loves and appreciates so many things about so many people, especially the people she lets into her heart. She deserves someone who will appreciate everything that makes her her, someone who accepts her warts and all…someone who just loves her," Dante gets to his feet, giving Dex a parting look, "Treat her right, man."
Dex says nothing, gently brushing his nose past the top of Kristina's forehead. His lips rest in her hair, Dante's words echoing in his brain. Kristina stirs again, eyes fluttering open.
"Mm…" she hums, rubbing her face with her palms. She scoots closer to Dex as he wraps an arm around her, a warm grin on his face, "Hi."
"Hi."
"Are Dante…" she yawns, "and Sam back?"
"They are. They're in the kitchen."
"Oh good," Kristina slowly gets up, stretching her arms up, "I'll be right back."
Dex watches her walk off, admiration openly present on his face. He takes a breath, stretching on the couch before getting to his feet, approaching the front door. Kristina walks over a few minutes later, "Ready to go?"
"I am if you are," he responds, taking her hand in his.
"Yeah," she looks around, "um, is it okay if I spend the night with you?"
His smile lights her up, "Absolutely."
