Kakashi winced as the blade cut into his flesh. Slowly, it dragged across his chest. He could feel his jaw Clench involuntarily at the pain, but he didn't make a sound. Instead he sat still, refusing to fight against his bonds, and really focused on the sensation he was feeling.

Perhaps he was a fool. He watched his shadow clone look at him with an ounce of regret.

"How much longer must we do this? You don't look good." The clone asked.

Kakashi shook his head, "Don't stop yet. Just a little more."

The clone looked down at the kunai in his hand, and the growing puddle of blood under him, "you have a mission tomorrow. You might get sloppy."

"It's fine. Just keep going," Kakashi ground out through his teeth.

The clone resolved himself, "Fine. But I'll only cut you twice more. That's it."

The clone hunched down on his knees and brought the knife to Kakashi's upper thigh. The blade sank slowly into the skin. He found it more agonizing when the blade was moving slowly. This was good. The clone pulled the knife slowly downward.

The last cut ran perfectly parallel from the previous one, but on the other leg.

The clone stood up and took in the pathetic state of his original's body. He understood why he was doing this, but he felt bad about hurting himself so seriously.

"That's it. I'm taking you down now. You've lost a lot of blood. If you lose consciousness then no one will be able to help you."

Kakashi nodded, "Fine. Good. Help me stop the bleeding."

The clone undid his bonds and helped him over to a chair. Kakashi had already prepared dressings for the wounds. He probably shouldn't push himself too far. He couldn't end up in the hospital like this, then people would find out. They would probably admit him, thinking he was unwell. Maybe he was a little bit, but his actions had purpose!

Once the bandages were on securely, he gingerly got dressed and dismissed his clone. It was at this point he began to regret pushing himself for so long. It was impossible to move without pain… and he really didn't think tomorrow would be better.

"Well, fuck me." He muttered to himself, as he left his apartment to slink around town. He hadn't bothered to clean up the bloody mess.

It wasn't until the night hit when he realized he couldn't sleep. The burning ache that covered his chest, back, stomach, and thighs were yelling at him. He writhed there for hours. It was almost worse at this point than it had been when he acquired the wounds, but he refused himself any pain-dulling medication for some stubborn reason.

He finally managed to doze off for an hour or so, before jolting back to reality with his alarm. And then curling in on himself with the pain of the sudden movement. "Fuck."

He felt like shit. His body felt hot and heavy, and somehow, he felt thirsty and nauseous with pain at the same time.

He decided it was pointless to regret his actions. They were done and nothing could change that, so he carefully changed his bandages, and dressed for his mission. The pack he wore cut into his fresh wounds perfectly.

Boy he could feel his mood sour. Was it sad that he had done this all to himself? Perhaps. His clone had been right. It was irresponsible. Sometimes the impulses overpowered his reason.

Kakashi made it to the gate, and his mission partner was already waiting for him by the time he got there. He straightened his posture, and relaxed his tension. Sauntering over as cool as can be. "Yo."

Her lavender-white eyes met his, and then a sweet smile formed on her face before bowing her greeting, "Kakashi-senpai. Good morning."

His eyes smiled back at her, "Good morning, Hinata-san. Are you ready to head out?"

Hinata nodded, "yes."


Kakashi felt cool hands touching his bare skin. It felt nice, he thought.

'Hands touching my skin…?'

His eyes shot open with alarm, and he made to defend himself from the groping hands, but a soft voice said his name, and he stopped in his tracks.

"Hinata?" He said groggily, "what happened?"

Her concerned face came into view, and he immediately felt a bit more relaxed, knowing it wasn't an enemy.

"I'm sorry I didn't notice you were unwell earlier. You collapsed as we were traveling... Honestly, we haven't made it very far at all. I… I suppose I did notice something was off... I just didn't expect…" she trailed off. "You have an infection. I treated it with antibiotic ointment, but I think we should really rest here for the day and continue on tomorrow."

He looked down at his bare torso.

"I'm sorry. I had to remove your clothing to see. The infection seems to only be affecting one of the wounds on your back… can you tell me what these wounds are? Did someone hurt you?"

Well shit, he thought. "It's just from some training. I apologize. I shouldn't have let it interfere with our work."

Hinata's big eyes roamed sadly over his bandages, she bit her bottom lip, "Training? Forgive me, Kakashi, but this doesn't look like training. It looks like torture."

Her hand ghosted back over his scarred and bandaged torso, but he caught her wrist, "it is training, I assure you."

He could feel her pulse quicken at the contact and she met his eyes. Perhaps he could distract her? His free hand reached to brush her cheek softly. He was amused as the color on her face started getting more and more vivid.

"What are you doing? We are having a serious conversation." She didn't try to pull away.

Kakashi made it a point to let her see how his eyes lingered on her lips. "I think preparing for our roles would be a more effective use of time."

"You are avoiding the topic, Kakashi."

His fingers were caressing her wrist sensually. How the heck did he manage to turn collapsing from an infection into whatever the heck mood he was trying to create? Why was she so weak to it?!

He didn't bother responding to her, and instead his fingers slid gently behind her neck, and pulled her closer.

"You are in no condition to be acting this way." Hinata spoke softly.

She had grown weak to his advances over the last few missions they shared. But she never let it progress further than a few stolen kisses. How could she? She knew better than that… Even when all she wanted to do was feed into it. And right now, even though she knew he was doing this because he didn't want to talk anymore, she let herself fall freely into the trap.

Her hand reached up and pulled his mask down, and their lips met.

This woman had done something to him. Months ago. He couldn't let that feeling go. The electricity that coursed through his body at the contact ached, and the ache never left. It stuck to his flesh, and made him act in ways he didn't recognize.

Perhaps that was why the Hokage kept sending them on missions like this. She had a keen eye, and liked to meddle where she shouldn't.

Hinata pulled away, but the desire reflected in her eyes was hard to miss. "You need to rest. We can talk later. Just tell me you are okay."

Kakashi missed her warmth. His hand finally fell away. "I'm okay."

She nodded and left his side to do a perimeter check.

What a lie. I'm not okay, Kakashi thought. He was in love, and he was terrified.


They had changed into civilian clothing during their last stretch of the journey. It had been silent and somewhat awkward between them the entire day. Hinata's thoughts were chaotic and restless.

A little ways outside of the town they were expected in, Kakashi pulled their rings out of his pack, and caught Hinata's hand, slipping one onto her finger.

God, how he wished that she could leave it on, after their mission was finished. He was staring at her hand, longer than he had meant to, so she took the other ring from his.

She felt bold, taking charge in this way. She could read his expression well. He struggled to hide his desires from her. If only he were an open book about the rest of it. She placed the ring on his finger, then looked back at his bare face.

"It's dangerous to get distracted, Kakashi."

He bent his neck down and kissed her again. It surprised her, so she pulled back. They had argued the night before.

"Kakashi, stop. I'm still upset with you." She turned her face and started walking away.

A frown tugged at his lips as he went to follow her. "What more can I do? I gave you my explanation."

She turned back to him sharply, "what you gave me was a lie. I'm no fool. It's insulting."

He seemed to shrink a little at her words.

"You lied to me, and now you act overly familiar. I can't believe that you are oblivious to my feelings. I don't like being toyed with. I've indulged your whims long enough."

Kakashi watched her as she turned and started walking again. She was a proud woman. She hadn't always been, but she had grown into it.

"Hinata wait. I'm sorry." He called after her. "I really… I can't give you specifics."

She could see through him. That was another lie.

"Don't... don't call them whims, Hinata. My feelings for you are not so cheap." He said quietly.

She turned at this, and gazed into his eyes. They softened. "If you feel genuinely, then why do you lie, knowing it hurts me? Forgive me, Kakashi. I cannot be with someone who hurts himself and wishes to die."

He opened his mouth to respond, but nothing came out. What could he say? He didn't want to lie to her again. He was mortified, and ashamed.

"You think you hide it so well. But I know. I've seen the injuries you hide. I didn't imagine you would take it so far... but I have to draw a line somewhere. I can't allow myself to fall in love with someone who is so reckless with their own life. I don't want to set myself up for such agonizing heartache." Tears had found their way into her eyes as she spoke. It was already too late.

Kakashi regretted it. He hated himself. He didn't want to make her cry. He reached out and pulled her body to his in an embrace. He felt the ache in his flesh, but worse was the ache in his heart. He felt her body rest in his arms. She was precious.

"Forgive me, Hinata. I'm sorry. I won't do it anymore." But there is purpose to it, he thought. "I swear, I won't hurt you. I won't leave you alone."

Hinata was crying, silent tears were running down her face but she sniffed and whispered to him, "You have to prove it to me."

His thumbs reached up to brush the tears from her cheeks. Her eyes were magnetic, and he leaned down and pressed his lips softly to hers. It was a first for them. The bittersweet moment. He felt her body press further into his, and his arms encircled her, and perhaps for the first time she felt the truth in his words and felt safe with his intentions.


Kakashi dyed his hair black. It was a pain in the ass, but he couldn't go running around with white hair. It was too noticeable.

He barely recognized himself in the mirror. Black hair, black eyes. Bare face. Civilian clothing. A golden band on his finger. He had made himself into a character by the name of Ryō.

Ryō was married to Narumi. Hinata had fashioned her long hair into a hime cut, and had no choice but to cast a henge over her eyes, as contacts would not cover her pupils. So Narumi had dark eyes, and dark, thick hair. Flawless and luminescent skin that showed no sign of being touched by the sun. The band on her finger shone white. She did not fit for a commoner, so they lied and told people she was frail since she was a child, and her proud house had grown destitute. Ryō had served her father, and he had been blessed by the man. Her father had looked fondly of the protection and love Ryō had showered upon her since she was young.

Ryō did not care that she was frail, he loved her. And though he was intimidating, and covered in scars, and much older than she, their neighbors began to think fondly of him for the care he showed. And the story made their defenses drop like heavy stones.

Hinata and Kakashi didn't bother adjusting their personalities, they suited their characters just fine. They had been stationed for over a month in the quaint village, she would stay home and mix medicines, and he would go work the fields with the other villagers. They had grown closer during these days, and the life of newlyweds hung like a rainbow above them. Sometimes Narumi would venture out of her sanctuary and visit with Ryō while he was working, and the villagers would catch a glimpse of her beauty, and the gentle love they shared. At night one or both of them would go out to gather intel on their targets.

Kakashi worried that perhaps he was drawing out the mission unnecessarily because he was enjoying her companionship so much, but he ignored the nagging in his head that told him to wake up, and that he had work to do. Real work, not his village job.

They eventually drew the rumor and attention of one of the men they had been sent to kill. He must have been only a few years older than Narumi, and he became quite taken with her beauty, so he tried to befriend the couple. He was ever wary of Ryō. He gave little thought to the possible threat of Narumi, though. She was harmless as far as he was concerned.

The man's name was Takeshi. Perhaps he seemed kind and innocent to the untrained eye, but in reality, he stole women from their families and sold them to different lands at great profit, purposefully aiming for poor commoners who had no recourse against such cruelty. He was not hard on the eyes, which Narumi imagined helped his cause more than hinder it. For whatever reason, beauty is given more trust, however unearned.

Takeshi would be discreet about it, but at times he would brush his hand against hers, and Narumi would bite her lip and cast her face down as the unpleasant feelings rolled across her body. Hinata had experienced harassment worse than this many times, but she could not help the disgusting shivers that ran up her spine. The audacity that this man had. It made her angry. He thought he had every right to force even tiny touches on women.

She had killed many men more honorable than him.


"Narumi, are you okay?" Ryō spoke softly, cutting through her thoughts. His hand reached out to caress her neck.

Her dark eyes lifted to meet his, "yes. I'm sorry, I was just thinking about Takeshi. How much longer do I have to put up with that disgusting man?"

"Not much longer," he murmured, "I have one more link to connect, and then he can die."

She curled into his hand and he felt a hot flame ignite in his chest.

"I hate the way that man leers at you. He thinks I'm blind to the little touches. I see everything. Fucking pig."

He felt the viciousness well within his chest, with anger and hatred all mixed into a toxic protective cloud. He probably wanted to kill Takeshi more than Hinata did, and that was saying something.

Hinata grasped Kakashi's hand and kissed his palm, and he broke out of the sudden dark cloud he had been in. Her hot breath ghosted over his skin as she murmured, "Don't be angry. As you said, he won't be around much longer."

Her lips returned to his fingers and she placed light kisses upon them. He didn't know she could look so lovely and inviting, but the alarm bells in his head were muted and he felt every thread of self-control snapping violently.

Perhaps this moment was the true point of no return for both of them. Because before either one of them truly recognized what was happening, they were kissing. Clothes were pulled off and thrown haphazardly around. His hands were dragging across her burning torso, fingers dipping into her flesh, and he was growling out words before he could comprehend what they were even meant to say. It was as though weeks of fragile caresses and longing finally tipped the scales.

"Hinata. I want to have you. All of you. I want to taste my wife."

She didn't even register that he had referred to Hinata as his wife, and not Narumi. "Don't you know? You already have it all," she breathed out. She couldn't remember a time where she had wanted anything more.

He ripped the rest of her clothes off, picked her up with little effort, and set her on their bed. Their bed which, until now, had been a shockingly chaste place. They were about to change that. He really took his time appreciating every part of her. He could feel the devastating power she kept tucked away. It hummed in rhythm with her heart, and simmered just beneath her skin. His hands were unashamed, and she realized that she loved it. Though she had become more familiar with men in the recent years, never did she feel herself fall so deeply into the comfort of the touches. She found her own hands eager to explore him as well.

She missed his silvery hair, and watching his face while he read his books. Those thoughts visited her often, but they didn't linger for long as he consumed her attention.

She loved him. She felt everything so clearly as he filled her with his love, and his canines sank deep into her exposed throat during the passion of it all.

Perhaps he realized what he had done with the taste of iron on his tongue, and he gently loosened his jaw and licked the angry bite he had accidentally caused.

He had left a mark on her, as if he were no better than a beast, but he couldn't bring himself to feel guilty over it just then.