moniqueismommy: dr banjo has explovid lol thats karma 4 ya✌️

turangaleela: moniqueismommy People don't get Explovid because they "deserve" it. It's contagious.

Leela usually didn't engage with Twitcher accounts that weren't pursuing her first, but she'd seen this kid's name pop up in her notifications and checked their account out of sheer boredom. The first post she saw just… got to her for some reason.

Before she knew it, she was in an online battle of justice with a high schooler.

moniqueismommy: turangaleela if ur antivaxx u reap what u sow

turangaleela: moniqueismommy It's not just antivaxxers getting Explovid.

turangaleela: moniqueismommy SOME of us are responsible and got it anyway.

moniqueismommy: turangaleela i wear my mask and dont have friends im fine

turangaleela: moniqueismommy SOME of us have jobs. And families.

moniqueismommy: turangaleela wear a mask u wont get sick

turangaleela: moniqueismommy SOME of us got Explovid before the diagnosis came out.

moniqueismommy: turangaleela ud still feel sick enough to stay at home

moniqueismommy: turangaleela at that point any1 u get sick is on u

Leela was full of such white hot rage, she thought she could vomit fire.

turangaleela: moniqueismommy You don't know shit about the world. Fuck off.

moniqueismommy: turangaleela wtf im literally neurodivergent and a larva?

turangaleela: moniqueismommy Stay in school. Stay off Twitcher. It makes you stupid.

turangaleela: moniqueismommy Also Monique's character is a feminist's nightmare.

She blocked moniqueismommy and sat back in a huff. That kid didn't know shit. It was not Leela's fault. She didn't know. Barely anybody knew anything back then! All she knew was she was feeling a little sick. Was she supposed to stay home every time she had the tiniest cough or mood swing? The company would fall apart. When the symptoms first started setting in, she couldn't stop to think about quarantining herself or wearing a mask. All she wanted was to prove she wasn't sick. Because why would she let herself get sick?

But she did let herself get sick. And now the rest of the planet was sick. And even though everyone seemed too distracted fighting each other to point any more appendages at Leela, Leela could never forget that this was all on her. She'd coughed right on Bill Nye, for fuck's sake! Were heads-in-jars high-risk? It didn't matter, it was still fucking stupid of her.

And after ten days locked in this dome, unable to touch anybody but herself, she'd noticed so many reasons to be angry with herself. And unlike a stan account on Twitcher, she couldn't just easily block that out and ignore it.

This was her fucking fault.

Leela curled up on the floor for a while, quietly sobbing and coughing, until she heard another knock at the dome.

"Go away, Fry," she croaked. "I'm not hungry."

"Oh, it's not food!"

Curious, Leela walked to the edge of the dome to face Fry. He had a bouquet in one hand and an orange Lovey Bear in the other. And most perplexingly, a smile on his face.

"I made you lunch, too," Fry continued, "but I couldn't carry it all without spilling gravy all over the Lovey Bear, so I'll bring it after. I just thought it'd be nice to start with the surprise."

Leela rubbed her eye. "Why'd you come back after I was so awful to you?" She still sounded frustrated, but it was the calmest she'd spoken to Fry in ages.

"Well, I know it's not really you," her boyfriend explained. "It's just that dumb virus." His eyes softened. "I can't go a night without seeing you, Leela, no matter how sick your brain and throat are."

Leela just turned her head.

He held up the Lovey Bear with a big smile. "You seemed upset about not being able to touch anybody, so I thought you'd like something to hug. You can pretend it's me, or your mom, or even someone famous. But I got it rigged with my voice, so it'll probably mostly make sense if it's me."

He squeezed the bear's chest, and it began to "speak." "I love you Leela! Okay, now do I stop the recording?"

Fry opened the slot to try and squeeze the Lovey Bear through. Leela just eyed it like it was a strange new alien species. After days and days of nitpicking every gesture he made, she could no longer deny that Fry still truly loved her. But that didn't mean she (or the virus) couldn't find a reason to be mad.

"Keep that bear out of here!" She knocked her fist against the dome, startling Fry into yanking the bear back out.

"Is there something wrong with it?" Fry asked. "They wouldn't let me redo the recording, if that's the issue."

Leela wished she could say No, there's nothing wrong with it, but her attempt to get the words out was intercepted by a raging headache and sudden coughing fit. "You can't –cough– wash it, idiot," she finally sputtered out. "A Lovey Bear with electrified vocal cords is super sensitive to water."

"Okay… so we'll just spray it with disinfectant every now and then?" he shrugged.

"It's not enough." She folded her arms into her chest. "We don't know how long this virus lives on porous surfaces. Even if I get better and take it home, it could contaminate the whole apartment."

"We can disinfect the apartment too! There were a lot more germs there before I cleaned it up for you."

She exhaled through her nose, though it was still a bit stuffed and gross. "You're way too casual about this. How the hell are you not already sick?"

"Everyone at work's been pushing for good hygiene now. You know you're supposed to wash your hands every time you use the bathroom?" He looked at his hands like he was seeing them for the first time. "What a world. Plus I'm not really hanging out with anybody else except at work, and also Bender who I don't think can get Explovid? It's hard to tell with him." He shrugged. "And even if I did get sick, it'd be okay. I'd just wait it out with you."

"That's stupid!" she shouted against the dome. Something about how cool he was acting triggered Leela's rage to burn hotter. "Do you not care about this pandemic?! Do you not care how out of control the planet is right now?!"

"Of course I care! You know it's killing me to see you like this."

"It's not just about me, you fucking idiot!" Leela banged so hard against the dome that Fry hid behind his own bouquet. "The entire world's in a frenzy because I brought this stupid virus to the surface."

"You didn't mean it!" Fry assured her. "It's like when I got that cold and it spread all over the place."

"Yeah, that was also fucking stupid."

"But we got through it, right? And you know I don't wanna make people hack up phlegm on purpose. Just like I know you don't wanna make people angry on purpose." He tucked the bear under his arm and pressed his hand against the dome. "I know the real you, Leela. I know this will pass. It just has to. And then it'll all go back to normal, and we can be together again."

Leela hovered her hand over Fry's, but even with the glass between them, she just couldn't bring herself to return his gesture. She let the fury overtake her and kicked the dome so hard, she nearly broke her toe. "Motherfucker!" she shouted.

"Are you okay?"

"Of course I'm not okay!" Leela screamed, running on anger autopilot. "I'm fucking miserable, and for what? Because I hugged my parents? Because I'm a good daughter?" She leered at Fry. "You only learned to wash your hands this week, and you're just hunky-fucking-dory. I'm the only one who cleans the bathroom at home, who remembers to throw out bad food and make sure everyone showers more than twice a month, and now I have to suffer?!"

"Wait…" Fry looked a bit put off. "Are you saying I deserve to get sick?"

"No!" She started hacking up a lung from all the yelling. "God, no. Nobody deserves to get sick. And nobody deserved to get sick from me. It's just stupid. It's all so fucking stupid. And you're stupid for trying to be nice to me like it's no big deal."

Again, Fry assured himself, "It's just the virus talking."

"It's just the virus talking," Leela mocked, "no shit it's the virus talking! You think it's hard to hear the virus talk once a day for, what, ten minutes?" She pointed at her head. "I'm hearing it talk to me every fucking hour. I can't think straight and I can't enjoy shit. And you keep pushing all these stupid… romantic ideas onto me as if that's gonna stop it. I'm sick, Fry. You can't fix me. Stop acting like you can."

There was an awkward pause for a moment; all they could hear was Leela's death rattle. Then Fry asked, a little hesitantly, "Do you still want the flowers?"

"No. Shove them up your ass."

Being angry at him still sucked, but it was easier than being angry at herself. At least Fry left when she needed him to.