A/N - This chapter is unedited. Please let me know if you see any issues or where you think the story might drag.
Let me know if you continue to see any issues with consistency, language/usage, or just too much information. This story will be published on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited at some point once it is finished (new target: September 10?).
Chapter 33
It was another week before Elizabeth finally posted a response to either of her parents. She did eventually write, in essence, what she had expressed to her husband soon after reading it. In her response, she accepted their apologies and thanked them for finally accepting their role in the break between the families. However, she was unwilling to make any additional overtures toward them and kept her response brief and straightforward — accepting the apologies but going no further.
In the meantime, Elizabeth and her aunt had called on Jane, learning a few things of particular interest. One, they discovered that Jane had also received a letter from their mother, less apologetic in tone but making it apparent that the matron had finally reflected on her treatment of her daughters and the havoc that had wreaked upon the family. Although Jane had been a favourite, Mrs Bennet apologised for pushing her so hard in the direction of any eligible gentleman and for her lack of excitement when she had made a good match. Mrs Bennet told Jane she had been disappointed her 'most beautiful daughter' did not make as good a match as her least favourite and was upset that the Darcys' marriage would always outshine the match of the eldest. The matron recognised the damage those words and feelings caused, accepting responsibility for the distance between the matron and her eldest daughter.
Jane made excuses for her mother, as remained her habit. "I cannot but forgive Mama when she asks for it, and to be honest, I forgave her long ago. However, my husband has been less willing to travel to Longbourn after Mama's hateful words, and I hope her letter will soothe him and convince him to allow her to come for my confinement."
"Jane, are you certain you would like Mama present when you give birth? She is hardly calm normally, and I cannot imagine her being of help when you are in the midst of your lying in," Elizabeth cautioned.
"Lizzy, you make too much of Mama's excitement," Jane admonished. "It will be well."
Elizabeth held her tongue, unwilling to say any more in the light of her sister's placidity. "We plan to remain in Town until mid-July, hoping your child will comply with our travel plans," she teased. "You still believe you will enter your confinement at the end of June?"
"I do," Jane confirmed. "The midwife visited a few days ago and confirmed the dates we thought. She believes I am carrying a girl because of how sick I have been throughout."
Aunt Gardiner nodded. "When I carried the girls, I was sick from nearly the first moment we suspected I was with child. I was sick for the first months with the boys, but it quickly subsided."
Elizabeth had nothing to add, but her sickness had not lasted long after they had begun to suspect she was with child. In December, she had been sick for a few days, but it had faded nearly as soon as it began. This time, she was slightly nauseated but had never felt the need to cast up her accounts. She merely felt more tired than usual and a little more emotional, two symptoms she recalled from her time carrying Alex.
During the remainder of the visit, little else was said about Mrs Bennet as Elizabeth was unwilling to discuss her feelings with her sister. She felt Jane would only try to convince her to allow their mother back into her life without expecting any changes. Jane was always too willing to excuse and forgive the offences of her mother, while Elizabeth was unwilling to do so without seeing evidence of a change. Much of that was due to the nature of the offences against Elizabeth, which were far more significant, constantly occurring over her childhood. As Jane had always been favoured by her mother, it was easier for her to forgive the slight when her mother felt she had not married as well as she might have done.
After visiting for an hour, Elizabeth and Mrs Gardiner left Jane's house, discussing Jane's reaction for a few minutes. "I will try to convince Jane not to invite her mother to town for confinement, as I do not believe Mrs Bennet will be of much use to her. She will be more likely to add to the general confusion of the event, but if Jane continues to insist, I will invite her to stay with me."
Elizabeth sighed. "I am not willing to face her yet, Aunt," she said. "I will not visit your home or Jane's while she is in residence. In my opinion, Jane is far too willing to forgive Mama, but then again, she has not been subjected to the angry and hateful words that I have been, and certainly not for as long as I have. Mama rarely had a positive word to say about me, and even when I married William, she still thought only of what she could gain from my marriage. She may truly repent her actions in the past, but while I can forgive her, I am still not certain I can be in her presence."
"I understand your feelings, my dear," her aunt replied. "There is far more between you and your mother than between your mother and Jane. And your temperaments are not the same."
Again, she sighed. "We are very different, but I will not appreciate Jane pressuring me in this regard. While I forgave Mama long ago, Jane kept trying to persuade me to act against my intention by writing to Mama after I said I would not. She told me I was obstinate and unforgiving by refusing to write or speak of her. I will not be manipulated or persuaded into seeing her, or either of them, until I am ready."
Mrs Gardiner patted her hand to calm her niece's rising anger. "I will not encourage Jane to act against your inclination in this matter and will warn her against doing so."
They arrived at the Gardiner home, and that lady departed the carriage with a few more reassuring words. Elizabeth returned home lost in thought of the exchange between the two sisters and briefly wondered if Jane was right. "Am I making too much of this? Am I wrong not to merely forgive and move on?" she thought.
She was nearly in tears when she arrived home and proceeded directly to her husband's study, where she nearly fell into his arms. "What is wrong, dearest?" he asked as he wrapped his arms around her, returning to his seat with her on his lap.
"Jane cannot understand my unwillingness to see Mama — truly, I do not want to see either of my parents and am not certain when I shall. She still believes I am being resentful and unforgiving, as she can easily forgive Mama for her sins against her. How much easier it is to forgive being treated as the favourite and only 'sinning' in disappointing Mama but not marrying as well as she might have done. I have years of disappointing and angering Mama and being subjected to her cruel words. Why can Jane not understand what I have tolerated over the years and allow me my reasonable anger? Why can she not understand that I might forgive my parents for their ill-treatment of me while still holding them accountable? Things have turned out well for me, but that was not due to the actions of my parents but is due entirely to the wonderful man who was willing to marry me when I came to him with nothing. I recognise my good fortune that you were willing to overlook my failings and lack of fortune or connections and marry me anyway," Elizabeth whispered as she cried.
"Shush, dearest," he murmured into her ear. "Jane does not understand because she did not have the same experience you did, and as you have frequently said, she tends to see the good in all things. She never experienced the vile accusations that your mother hurled at you or saw the callous way your father and mother treated you. You will only see your parents when you are ready to see them, and no one will force you to do so until then."
"We intended to remain in London until after Jane gave birth, but if she follows through with her desire to invite Mama to come to town for the birth, I may ask you to leave London earlier. I would not want to encounter her accidentally, and I am willing to suspect Jane would try to force a meeting between us, somehow thinking that would 'fix' things," Elizabeth said after a moment. "We have spoken before of leaving town sooner than the end of the Season. Georgiana will not object, or we can leave her here with Lady Matlock to escort her."
He smiled and kissed her temple. "Dearest Elizabeth, you know that I would not object to that in the least, but do you truly desire not to be present when Jane gives birth? I know how upset you were to miss her wedding, and I do not want you to miss this if I can prevent it."
She snuggled further into his embrace. "I love you, my Will," she said, lightly kissing his lips. "However, Jane will have to decide if she prefers my presence or my mother's at her lying in because both of us will not be there. I will ask my aunt to let me know if she is expected in town, as Jane may not be willing to inform me. I worry that should I remain for Jane's lying in, she will attempt to manipulate me into seeing my mother."
Darcy hugged her tighter. "I love you too, my Elizabeth," he said before returning the kiss. They remained sitting in his chair, their arms around the other, as they considered what to do about both the Bennets and Jane.
Over the next month, Elizabeth and her parents exchanged a few more letters. Mr Bennet had written a more newsy letter, speaking of the changes he was continuing to make to the estate and his expectations for success. Mrs Bennet wrote describing her efforts with the tenants and outlining her plans for helping her husband as he makes changes to the estate. She also told Elizabeth the news of the tenants — two had new children that had come over the winter — particularly of the children. Strangely, Mrs Bennet had found herself drawn to the children and had become almost grandmotherly toward them, spending time entertaining and teaching them.
To say Elizabeth was surprised by this was an understatement. Her mother had barely taken an interest in her children's education, so it was rather shocking that she would take time to educate the children of their tenants.
Elizabeth wondered if her mother might have genuinely begun to change. Elizabeth had few friends remaining in Meryton, but she did write to her aunt Phillips and a couple of other acquaintances to ask for the news of Meryton. She did not specifically ask after her mother, but she hoped these letters might include information about that lady, especially since it appeared she was acting out of character.
These letters did not disappoint, as they were full of praise for the Mistress of Longbourn and her efforts on behalf of not only the tenants, but they also spoke of how much kinder and less anxious she had become. Mrs Phillips wrote a rather lengthy letter describing her sister's efforts at Longbourn and praising Elizabeth for becoming such a celebrated hostess within the ton. Elizabeth was reminded why she did not frequently write to her aunt, as the lady wrote many words without saying much. Other notes she received commented on the changes at Longbourn and how surprised they were to see Mr and Mrs Bennet getting along and working together on behalf of the estate.
When Elizabeth discussed these with Darcy, the surprise was still clearly evident in her voice. Darcy recognised this and sought to reassure his wife as she frequently became overwrought at reading how caring her mother was toward their tenants' children. How different this woman had seemed to become affected Elizabeth so strongly, as she wondered why her mother could treat the tenants' children so kindly but could not do the same for her children.
Even as they exchanged these letters, Mrs Bennet rarely asked anything personal about Elizabeth's situation and mainly spoke of what she was doing. Elizabeth felt her mother was seeking praise from her for doing what she should have been doing her entire married life. Instead, Mrs Bennet had chosen to allow her daughters to do the work that was rightfully the responsibility of the mistress of the estate. That Mrs Bennet never asked about Elizabeth's own life, and particularly never asked of her son, bothered Elizabeth more than she could put into words and made her remain reluctant to meet with her.
The letters from Mr Bennet were similar — speaking mainly of his work on the estate and not asking questions about Elizabeth, Darcy, or little Alex. This lack of familiarity in the letters wore on Elizabeth, and she began to struggle to respond. She almost felt numb regarding Longbourn and the stress of that situation and the general stress of the Season wore on Elizabeth. She was tired and waspish, and Darcy grew increasingly concerned about his wife's health.
One day in late June, Darcy, claiming he had business to attend to, sought out his wife's uncle to discuss the situation. "Gardiner," he began as he entered the man's office at his warehouse, "this situation between my wife and her parents is not good. Elizabeth will not say so, but I can tell she is troubled by the letters she receives from Longbourn. Nothing personal is discussed, and Mr and Mrs Bennet keep outlining all the steps they are taking to improve the estate and the tenants' lives. They never ask after Elizabeth or Alex — the letters we receive from the steward and housekeeper at Longbourn are more personal than the letters from her parents. Do you have any insight into what they may be thinking or trying to accomplish?"
Gardiner merely shook his head in reply. "Lizzy frequently shares her letters with my wife, and while she does not say much, my wife has the same concern. I do not know if they are afraid of asking personal questions in case they are misinterpreted, but I cannot see my sister being that subtle or that judicious. Franny has always been a flighty thing and, honestly, very selfish, and I do not know if she will understand how her letters injure Lizzy instead of helping to reconcile. Perhaps if we were to get them into the same room, they could clear the air, but it would require my sister to listen rather than to speak. If Franny were to overhear Lizzy speaking of how much she has been injured by her mother's treatment of her throughout her life and how the impersonal letters are doing little to aid in that, then perhaps …" He trailed off, even as he was expressing this tentative plan, he questioned how it could work. Franny had never been one for subtlety or admitting she was wrong. However, she had apologised to her daughters for various wrongs she committed, but did she truly understand precisely how those have affected her family? He pondered this for a moment before he spoke again.
"Darcy, I am not certain what, if anything, would remedy the estrangement between your wife and my sister. Perhaps my idea of her overhearing Lizzy speaking of her thoughts about her mother to someone else might enlighten Franny to just how badly she has hurt her daughter. She intends to come to town in a few weeks to help Jane after she gives birth — Maddie has managed to convince Jane she does not want her mother with her during that process. If we invite Franny here and situate her to listen… it might work."
Darcy nodded. "Elizabeth has not yet felt the quickening for this new child, although we think it should be soon. I worry that the stress of the situation with her parents is compounding the stress of the Season, and it is having a negative effect on her health."
"Maddie had said something about that and about how difficult it is for Elizabeth since Jane cannot or will not understand what Elizabeth has always faced from her mother. Elizabeth and Jane cannot even discuss their mother any more, and I think that wears on her too," Gardiner said.
"So, how do we get Mrs Bennet and my wife in the same house without either one knowing about it?" Darcy asked. "And how do we prevent Mrs Bennet from immediately bursting into the room when she realises what she is hearing? It will only work if she hears what her daughter truly thinks about her — even after all she has been through with her, I believe Elizabeth would temper her words if she were aware her mother could hear her."
"You are right in thinking Elizabeth would not deliberately harm her mother, even if she needs to hear what will be said," Gardiner agreed. "I will speak to Maddie; women are far better at subtle machinations than us men are. There is little doubt that I would make a muddle of it. Mrs Bennet will arrive at our home shortly after Jane gives birth and will stay for a day or two before moving to Jane's home. The womenfolk, well, mine and yours, decided it was best to allow Mr Hastings to see Mrs Bennet in his home a few times before she comes to stay in his house with him. If she proves too difficult to tolerate in the visits, I suppose she will have to remain here."
Having arrived at a tentative plan, Darcy and Gardiner did actually speak of business — some investments they were both involved in — before both departed for their homes to speak with their wives. Darcy would not broach this subject with his, while Gardiner would seek his wife's advice on convincing Mrs Bennet to hear Elizabeth's true feelings for once.
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