Hi Everyone! I am loving the comments, messages and feedback that you're offering me on this story. Thank you so much! Your reviews have sent my mind into overdrive as I'm trying to piece together some middle chapters…and an ending. ;) Please hang in there with me as we work toward the re-entrance of Dr. Motorcycle Man. Remember, I am Pro-Caskett at heart!

Now…let's see…Castle's trying to get things straight in his head - thank you quiet space in the p.i. office - and Beckett just wants her husband home with her. Ready for Chapter 6? Let's go!

KTCLF!
-adcg

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Moments of Always
Chapter 6: That Moment When …

It was nearly one in the morning when he unlocked the door of the loft. He worked to be quiet although he knew he was still slightly inebriated which meant fumbling with keys and dropping his phone.

"Castle?" came the familiar voice from the couch.

"Yeah," he answered and then added, "I told you not to wait up."

"I wasn't," Kate attempted to lie. "I just fell asleep out here."

"Well," Rick started, trying to choose his words carefully, "if you're awake enough now, go on to bed. I'm just gonna crash out here."

"Rick?" he could hear the quiver in her voice and knew his thought about sleeping on the couch was about to go out the window.

"What?" he answered coolly.

"Take me to bed? Please?" It sounded like a childish request, especially as she reached her arms outward, toward his voice.

Rick took in a deep breath and made his way through the darkness to Kate on the couch.

"Are you alright?" His internal war would never be able to battle his concern for her. Still he kept his voice even with the hope that she wouldn't read too much into his inquiry.

"Mmm-hmm," Kate touched his chest with one hand and pushed herself up off the cushions with the other once he was standing in front of her. "I don't like it when you're upset with me. And I've gotten used to having you at home with us. I just didn't wanna go to bed by myself," she added.

She heard Rick take in another long breath. There was still enough child-like innocence in their relationship that both would always be hurt by the fear of genuinely upsetting the other.

"I'm not upset with you," Rick kept his voice even and soft, not wanting to get into anything at the moment. Kate understood his tone. She didn't say anything else and was calmed, at least slightly, when she felt his hand winding around her bicep. He gently tugged on her until she was in front of him and then moved his hand to the small of her back lightly pushing her toward their bedroom.

Kate blinked. Both of them could travel this route blindfolded. The path from their couch to their bed was pretty well worn but she much preferred the way they often stumbled from one place to the other, connected at the lips with arms wrapped around each other.

She reached back for him and got a hand on his shirt.

"I'm right here," Rick assured her without any additional thoughts.

When they reached the bedroom he purposefully left the lights off, except for the faint hint of the nightlight from the master bathroom. He ushered her to the bed, pulled back the comforter and sheets on her side and waited for his wife to lie down before putting the covers over her and tucking her in.

He turned to go back to the living room but Kate caught his hand. "I don't wanna sleep here alone. I need you to hold me. I just want to feel your arms around me, Rick."

He chanced actually looking into her eyes for the first time since he had gotten home. He could see the redness and knew she had cried. That was exactly what he was trying to avoid, yet there she was, right in front of him, tear stains on her cheeks, still needing him, even in his confused and frustrated state of being. He was reminded yet again that a part of him would give in to her every time, because he loved her.

"I need to use the bathroom and change clothes," he conceded. "If you're not asleep by the time-"

"I won't be," Kate interrupted and squeezed his hand. She could see his bloodshot eyes as well but wondered if they were alcohol induced, tear-streaked, or both. "Rick, I know, obviously this isn't the time to discuss anything. But B.C. and I just need to be in your arms. Your little girl needs her Daddy."

"Stop," Rick ordered gently. "I'll be back, just give me a couple of minutes." How dare she use their child… Who was he kidding…

Kate released his hand and tuned her ears to the various sounds of her husband in the bathroom, brushing his teeth, washing his hands and face. She urged her body to stay awake for just a few more minutes.

And when he climbed into his side of the bed she immediately backed her body up against him and welcomed the touch of his arm wrapping around her. She slid his hand down over her abdomen and was very happy to feel his instinctive response: fingers finding their way under her t-shirt (one of his that she had claimed long ago) and resting against her womb; his nose pressed against her shoulder and his lips placing a kiss against that spot.

B.C. shifted, and Kate immediately pressed Rick's hand more firmly against the spot where she felt movement. Without a word she knew he understood.

"You're little girl is gonna be a night owl," Kate whispered, with the hope that this moment would impress to him how much they needed to figure this out, together.

But Castle didn't respond. He just kept his nose against her shoulder for another moment before pulling back. "Go to sleep, Kate," he instructed. "You need your sleep."

She was a little discouraged, understanding that he still wasn't ready to discuss anything. But she did take comfort in the fact that he was home and she was in his arms.

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"Did Dad come home last night?" Alexis came down the stairs as Kate was sitting down at the counter to have some cereal and juice for breakfast.

The older Castle daughter could tell that her stepmother was tired, obviously hadn't gotten enough sleep, and was still bothered by the situation at hand.

"Yeah," Kate responded and looked into her stepdaughter's face, "but it was late. Like, late enough that he expected me to be in bed and asleep."

Alexis noted Kate's serious look and matched it. "So where is he now?"

"He left me a note on the bedside table saying he was going back to the office. Needs to do a little more research…b.s.," Kate shook her head as she commented. "He told me again that my p.t. appointment is this afternoon and I should try driving myself since I'm cleared."

"Hmm," Alexis studied Kate for another moment then went directly to the Keurig. She paused before putting a pod in the machine. "I'm sure he just needs a little time to think things through. She paused again then asked, "Do you mind if I have coffee?"

Kate shook her head and offered the younger woman a soft smile. "Not at all, have at it. Matter of fact, would you make a cup for me? This is not a day that I want to forgo caffeine. B.C.'s just gonna have to do some extra somersaults to work off the jolt for both of us."

Alexis smiled and reached into the cabinet for two mugs. Things were quiet for a couple of moments as she brewed both cups and brought one over to sit down and continue their conversation.

"Do you want me to go to the appointment with you?" Alexis offered kindly but Kate took a deep breath and shook her head.

"No," she stated simply, "but thank you."

"Do you want me to go to the office and talk to Dad?" Alexis raised her eyebrows and tried to think of other options.

Again Kate shook her head. "No. I just really want to talk to Rick about this. I know the idea of Josh bothers him. But there's gotta be more to it."

"You know," Alexis took a sip of her coffee then caught Kate's eye, "just speaking from personal thoughts here, the fact that Dr. Ange might even think that something could happen to you… I mean, you and Dad have worked so hard to get where you are and he's just now climbing off the emotional roller coaster from the car accident and learning you were pregnant - and I know you are as well. I mean, you're living it, for goodness sake, but I bet, even just the thought of possibly losing you…again…I mean," she paused and shrugged one shoulder giving Kate her best contemplative look, "it's a thought that kept me awake for a while last night…" Alexis's voice trailed off and Kate froze momentarily as the words sank in.

"I'm fine, Alexis," she looked at the red head sitting next to her. Was she trying to appease her stepdaughter, or herself? Kate wondered but wanted- no, needed - to keep up the somewhat positive thoughts.

"But your doctor -"

"Wants to take precautions to make sure that I stay fine," Kate said firmly.

It took the mom-to-be just another moment before she turned in her seat and reached for her stepdaughter, offering and wanting to share a hug. She felt Alexis swallow the metaphorical lump in her throat before the girl's shoulders relaxed.

They both held each other for a few moments before Alexis pulled back and added, "I'm just telling you what I think Dad is feeling. I don't think he and I have some psychic Daddy/Daughter thing but if he felt anything like I did last night, when I had a chance for our conversation to sink in… We just want to take care of you and B.C. Kate, we need you both."

Kate blinked as she recognized the look on Alexis's face. It was amazing how much the fair-skinned, red-headed female looked like Richard Castle. And she could mimic his facial expressions with no hesitation.

"I told your dad that there was no way I would let him raise our baby on his own. And I mean that. I appreciate Dr. Ange's concern and I'm willing to get a heart checkup and have 50 cardiologists on standby. But I'm telling you, I'm - we - are going to be fine."

Kate placed a hand between Alexis's shoulder blades and pulled her in tightly again.

"Somebody besides this little girl's big sister has got to be here to counteract her father's childishness," she laughed and was happy to hear Alexis's short giggle before they both stopped abruptly and Alexis pulled away.

She looked into Kate's face with wide eyes. "Wait, did you say?"

"Oh crap," Kate pressed her lips together. "I did, but please, please don't say anything. I know once your Dad works through this, he's gonna want to decorate cupcakes and hang banners and paint walls. Please, Alexis, don't even tell Martha or Hayley, okay?"

Alexis nodded slowly and rested her teeth on her lower lip. "I… a sister," she whispered and attempted to blink back the wetness that coated her eyes.

"Do you remember," she changed the subject only slightly, "when you and Dad were caring for that baby boy, Benny, was his name, right? Gram and I took him out shopping and bought him some clothes and just made a day of it."

Kate laughed. "Of course I remember. That was eye opening. Seeing your dad with that little guy… I knew then that I wanted to have a baby of our own if we could." She smiled a closed mouth press of the lips in Alexis's direction.

"Gram said, after that night, that she could see the two of you as parents, together," Alexis smiled sweetly.

"Did that bother you?" Kate wondered and Alexis shrugged.

"There was a little while, I admit, that my heart didn't like the idea of not being the sole Castle kid. But the more I see you and Dad together the more I realize that a baby - this baby - is an overflow of your love for each other. I never witnessed that between Dad and my mom - I mean other than the short-lived hookups whenever Mom came to town."

"Deep fried Twinkie…" Kate said.

"What?" Alexis wondered and Kate sat up a little straighter realizing she had said the words out loud and how they likely sounded to Meredith's daughter.

"Oh, your dad used to say that Meredith coming to town was like enjoying a deep fried Twinkie - not something he wanted every day, but he sure did enjoy it - her - when he could," Kate couldn't help the roll of her eyes as she tried to explain the derogatory remark about Alexis's mother.

Alexis also rolled her eyes.

"I'm sorry," Kate added with an extra cringe, but Alexis brushed it off.

"Honestly, that's probably a really good way to look at it. I love my mom, Kate, but responsibility is not her middle name, ya know? You've met her and talked to her. She can be smart, she can be responsible. But she's also self-centered. And, she's not what Dad needed and hasn't been for a long time."

"He always says you were the best part of their marriage." Kate nodded. "But you missed her being here, growing up, didn't you?" Kate asked surprisingly easily.

Alexis shrugged. "Yeah? No? I'm not sure. I know Dad went out of his way to be Mr. Mom. Gram was here - even when she wasn't living with us - and until they passed, my mom's parents weren't far away. I spent time with them in the summers and some of the winter holidays."

She paused but Kate could tell there was more Alexis wanted to add. "Dad never brought dates home - after he and Mom divorced. He never wanted to make me think that he was trying to replace Mom. Well, except for Gina, but I was old enough to know she wasn't the 'mom' type. They were only in it for the books, ya know?" Again the young woman paused and chewed on her bottom lip as she thought about sharing her next thought.

When she continued she looked down into her mug of now-cool coffee. Her lips pulled to her left cheek in a sad, almost sarcastic twinge before she said, "I know Mom cheated on Dad. I'm not sure he realizes that I know that, even now. He's tried to shield me from it and never would talk to me about it except to say that she made choices and our family was better off if I stayed with him. I also know that was the straw that broke them up. Knowing how much she hurt Dad…that's not something I'm able to just forgive and forget, especially now that I understand it more. But I do still love her."

Alexis looked back at Kate, took another sip of her coffee and then smiled softly. "I'll admit now that when Dad started working with you I could see him falling hard for you. I'm not blind. And I worried that either you didn't feel the same way, or that you would ditch him for someone else - even after the two of you got together…together," she took a long breath giving Kate a second to contemplate trying to defend herself but Alexis smiled a little wider and put a single finger in the air.

"But," she continued, "as I've grown and especially once I was at Columbia, I realized why Dad was falling so madly in love with you. Even with him driving you crazy, you took time to get to know me, Gram, and even with everything you have on your plate, you made time for us. You guys weren't dating, but he brought you home with him and let you into our lives - deeply, into our lives. That's when I realized that I love you too and you belong right here with our crazy family - and that we need more crazy people in our family so why not add more kids to the Castle name?"

Kate smiled as Alexis rushed through the end of her explanation and then lifted her coffee mug in Alexis's direction. "Castle-Kid-Number-1, my heart started falling in love with this whole family the day you and Martha came to bail your Dad out of jail…the first time. And when you called me and we met to talk about the semester abroad opportunity that you had for high school…that was big. Your dad saw it as a big deal and so did I. You're smart and you have some common sense running through your veins that is well tested. I commend you for using that throughout your life, especially knowing your father like I do."

She and Alexis both laughed at that idea.

"Thank you for sharing all of that with me, Alexis," Kate responded and took a slow sip of her coffee. "Oh my god, that's good. Your father hasn't let me have coffee in weeks," she closed her eyes and hummed as she held the cup to her chin, breathing in the scent and warmth.

"So," Alexis reverted to the beginning of their chat, "back to the man who is sadly missing this common sense element that the two of us apparently share," she smiled and watched as Kate pressed her lips together in a forced positive look. "Are you just going to wait him out? Or do you have some kind of plan in mind to confront the Josh issue with him?"

Kate took a deep breath, took another long drink of her coffee and then sat her mug on the counter and sat up straighter, putting a hand against her baby bump.

"I think we need a few days to ourselves," she stated simply.

Alexis thought about the words but waited for Kate to add to them.

"I need to cancel my p.t. appointment. Would you mind bringing down the medium suitcase from the spare bedroom closet? I need to make a few calls to get things ready for us," Mrs. Castle spoke as the ideas came to her mind.

The redhead nodded as she began to see the picture that Kate's mind was putting together. "I'll call Ella to make sure you've got groceries and everything you need at the Hamptons house," she offered.

Kate shook her head. "We're on the same track, but that's not exactly the destination I've got in mind. If my shooting and my recuperation from that, with Josh, is what's bugging your dad…I need to take him back to where I recovered. There's a three-month span that we never talked about. Maybe it'll help ease this tension."

Alexis looked at her curiously.

"My dad's cabin," Kate supplied. It's secluded, private and it's where I spent weeks just coming to terms with everything," she provided. "Would you mind picking us up a few groceries and snacks for the road?" She pressed her lips together and continued looking at Alexis's face as she took a deep breath before adding, "It's also where I broke up with Josh."

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Afterthoughts… I have had a ton of thoughts about Kate's time at the cabin, and just additional ideas about her time in the hospital after her shot to the heart. Who was it that called Castle to tell him she was awake? Did Kate ask someone to call him, or did he just show up? How long was she in the hospital? Did Castle keep working the case until Gates booted him out of the precinct? We know he kept working it, but at what point did he really realize that Kate wasn't going to call him back - and what did he do to get through that before accepting it? SOOOO many questions!

That's where I stand as I post this chapter. All thoughts, suggestions and comments are welcome! (Please just be nice - you can say you don't like Josh/the story direction/my writing…as long as you don't shred me to pieces please! ;))

With that, I leave you with my typical… Your reviews feed my muse - so please keep them coming!

KTCLF!
-adcg