A/N - To whoever reads this in the future, THANK YOU for taking the time to read this story, this last year has been a rough one for me and I'm so proud that I was able to complete this story despite all of that. Make sure to check out the author's note at the end of this story for an exciting announcement :)

If I have to go back into that Arena, I'll kill myself.

That's what I've told Soren, anyway. That was six months ago, and here I am, still kicking. I've never been good at keeping promises.

I grunt as I try to shove all of my clothing into my tiny suitcase. After years of visiting the Capitol, I've figured out the best way to fit everything, but this trip will be different. No matter the outcome of the Reaping, this will be the last time I visit the Capitol like this.

Tomorrow is the Reaping for the 150th Hunger Games. The day we've all been dreading. I only found out a year after I won the Games that I could possibly be sent back. After the Second Rebellion, President Snow decreed that the 150th Games would be a repeat of the failed 75th Games, once again filled with Victors. I've always hoped that fate would strike me down and kill me before today arrived.

For a while, hope wasn't entirely lost for me. Penny won the Games about ten years after me, so I haven't been the only female Victor in Five for a while. As time has passed, though, I've realized that my fate is sealed.

I can't leave Penny alone here and force her into the Hunger Games. I may be twisted, but I know that's not right. I care too much about Penny to do that to her, which brings me back to why I'm still here. If I killed myself like I swore I would, Penny would have no other option but to be Reaped back into the Games. She may only be a decade younger than me, but she still has her life ahead of her. I hit a dead end the moment I left the Arena.

I can't help but think about the Reaping tomorrow. There will be only four names in the Reaping bowls - Simon, myself, Penny, and Cyrus. A fifty-fifty chance for each of us. We've agreed that we'll let the odds pick the tributes. No volunteers. The other Districts' Victors have been fighting for the last six months over who will volunteer and save whom. In Five, we're letting the Reaping bowl speak for itself.

Except I will not. If Penny is Reaped, I will volunteer. I have nothing else to live for here. I hope that Simon is Reaped as well for the same reason as me - Cyrus only won a few years ago, and he doesn't deserve to go back into the Arena so soon. Whatever happens will happen, though. Whoever is Reaped will almost certainly die against the other Victors of Panem, and the remaining two will live on.

The doorbell rings, ripping me from my thoughts. I'm surprised to hear it - who could be here at this late hour? I already saw Penny this morning; Simon's probably asleep already, and Cyrus never really visits.

I descend the staircase from my bedroom, clicking the door open to reveal someone I never expected to see.

"Amala," I exhale. My niece beams at me from my porch. "What are you doing here?"

"Saying goodbye," Amala says, giving me a look-over. I probably look like a mess. "You're leaving tomorrow, and who knows if you'll be Reaped..."

I don't tell her that my mind is already made up. "Come in," I say, opening the door wider to let her in. "It's so good to see you."

Even though we're family, I'm shocked that Amala would come all the way up here to visit me. She's busy with her own family now, and I haven't always been there for her when I should've.

Don't get me wrong, I was there. It took me about a year after my Games to finally visit Amala and her mother, but I took the leap. It was only right; Amala is the only family I have left.

Still, it's been rocky at times. I'm not the most dependable, and I know that. There have been times when I should have been there - birthdays, graduations - and I'd spend the night with a bottle instead. Christina's always held it against me, but she doesn't understand the hell I have to endure every day of my life.

I still made an effort, especially when Amala was younger. Her mother objected to it, but I forced her to train with me for the Hunger Games just in case she was Reaped. Simon warned me that it's happened before, and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I had to watch my niece die. It would be my fault for not preparing her. Well, she passed through the years and was never selected. Christina didn't let me near her much after that.

"I can't believe you might be gone after tomorrow," Amala says, pulling her hair out of her face to look at me. "You know, you and my mom might not always be on good terms, but you're my aunt, and you mean a whole lot to me. It hurts to feel like after everything that happened with my dad, it might all be for nothing."

For years, I've thought I was numb to this. The pain of remembering has dulled all emotions related to the Games. So why is my heart aching?

"I don't want to go," I whisper, speaking to myself more than to her. "Amala, I've dreaded this for years, and I just... can't-"

I'm unable to finish my sentence; tears spill from my eyes and down my face. This is the first time I've cried in years, and it feels like all of the pain from the Games that I've been immune to for so long is piercing my chest at once.

Amala stands from the armchair across from me, sitting next to me and placing a hand on my shoulder. "I love you," she says. "And I'm so proud of you. I know this is hard for you."

I nod, trying my best to pull myself together. "Sometimes I feel like I can only think about the moment I'm in," I admit. "If I look back, it'll just hurt me. I have nothing to look forward to in the future. This whole thing - the Reaping - is forcing me to look around. I have to think about the Hunger Games again because chances are I'll be going into them again. I have to look back on the past, and it reminds me of everything I didn't do. All the things I could've done in my life, and I wasted it. And I won't have a future if I'm Reaped, I know that. It'll all be over."

"You haven't wasted anything, Luna," Amala says, her eyes on fire. "Don't say that. Sure, there were times when you could have been better. After what you endured, though, I can't blame you. It's just who you are because of what you've been through. For what it's worth, I still love you. And if you're Reaped tomorrow, I just want you to know that I'll miss you."

"That means the world to me," I sniff. "You mean the world to me. And I'll miss you too. Amala, I'm going into the Games. I'm going to volunteer."

This is the first time I've said it out loud; not even Simon knows this secret. Amala takes a step back, momentarily horrified, but she regains her composure.

"That's the Luna I love," she says with a smile. "I know you have it in you. You're the bravest person I know, I think."

I wave away Amala's empty compliments - I know that's not true. Still, it means so much to hear her say that.

Amala wraps me in a hug, squeezing me tight. "Don't be so regretful," she advises me. "Think about all the good things you did since you won the Games. And even in the Games, too. Whether or not your future is cut short tomorrow, think about all the futures you protect by doing so. Okay?"

I sink deep into my niece's arms, and I can feel the weight of my past slipping from my shoulders. Tomorrow, I will be Reaped into the Hunger Games, and I will die in that Arena. And after that, the Games will be finished for good. Penny will live out the rest of her life in peace, and Amala will raise her kids without worrying that they'll be killed in the Games. That's the legacy I want to leave... If I can do that, everything I've suffered in this life will be worth it.

A/N - For those who haven't read Ultimate Crown yet, Luna was ultimately selected in the Reaping for the 150th Games, so she never got the chance to volunteer. I hope this chapter shines a light into Luna's psyche right before the Reaping took place!

Originally this last chapter was supposed to take place a year after the 117th Games, when Luna visits Christina and Amala for the first time. I couldn't get motivated to write that, though, and so I assume readers wouldn't be motivated to read it. I didn't want to have an epilogue before the 150th Games like this as I already wrote one in Twin Snakes, but that's the way the chips fall!

And now, a big announcement:

[NEW STORY: SAPPHIRE TEARS]

After posting this chapter, my sixth story, Sapphire Tears, will be posted on my page, so make sure to check it out! In this story, I'll be returning to the format of my first story, Bleeding Hearts, as we follow the stories of all twenty-four tributes in the 98th Hunger Games. The 98th Games feature some of the strongest tributes in the history of the Games, and a Gamemaker-introduced twist will change the Games like never before. I'm so excited for this story, and I hope you are excited to read it!

Another huge thanks to everyone who has read and supported this story for the last nine months - at times, I have struggled to keep it going, but we made it. I can't believe I can finally say that I have FIVE stories completed!

See you all in the next one :) all my love

~S