Chapter 2
Edna was escorted to the swamp by the two doctors who assumed she was a man. She wasn't even trying to pass as a man but the stuck-on fake mustache and Charles declaring her to be his younger brother sealed her fate and she knew it. She would have to wait for the glue to wear off so she could remove the fake mustache and tell everyone the truth. She felt horrible for her joke backfired splendidly. She was only going to be in disguise long enough to surprise her brother. She imagined herself sneaking up to him at the camp, removing the hat and ripping off the fake mustache and yelling "Surprise" to her brother. In her imagination, Charles would welcome her with open arms and asked how she got there and say how happy he was to see her and how much he missed being home.
Instead, he accused her of committing a crime and schemed to find a way to send her home before anyone could find out she was in fact his little sister. She rather miffed at his attitude and at herself for failing to surprise him in a happy way.
She could easily pass herself off as an officer and a gentleman. She had done it before during World War Two. She decided she would use her former service record to her favor instead of hiding the fact that she was a fighter ace. She chatted with Hawkeye and B.J as she walked between the pair to the tent.
"What's it like to live with my brother?" she asked to pair trying to not laugh for she knew how difficult Charles could be.
B.J. replied, "Not too bad when he's not complaining of what a pig pen we live in."
"Or being a pompous snob and listening to his classical music." Hawkeye added.
Eddy stated, "We are both classically trained musicians. Father sent us to school to learn music at an early age. I like classical music." She then grinned, "I also like that new stuff. They call it 'rock n roll'."
B.J. asked, "That stuff the kids listen too?"
"Ah-ha." she nodded. "It's actually a mix of blues and some classical."
"That stuff is terrible." B.J. told her shaking his head.
"No it's not." she disagreed. "I like it! It's got an nice beat. My favorite is Glenn Miller though."
B.J. cheered and held up a finger. "Now that is music! My wife and I love to dance to that big band swing. Peggy loves Glenn Miller."
Hawkeye miffed, "I love a good ball game."
"Well, here it is." B.J. stated as he led Eddy and Hawkeye into the tent. He motioned towards the corner, "There is a spare cot you can take over there. It's on your brother's side of the tent so you will have to deal with his neat freak problem."
"We're both neat freaks." she informed. She nodded as she looked about, "Cleaner than I expected." she confessed. "The still is neat. Almost as nice as the one we had in the RAF."
B.J. and Hawkeye traded glances rather shocked.
Hawkeye asked, "You mean you are impressed by our still?"
She nodded with a pondering look.
He grinned and grabbed a martini glass and filled it with the clear substance. He offered it to her, "Have a martini."
She took the glass rather amused and then smelled it. She took a tiny sip, swished it about her mouth for a second and swallowed. She puckered in thought as she assessed the booze. She told him, "Not bad. Might want to adjust the flame a little." She then drank the rest of the booze in one shot and handed Hawkeye the glass. "I asked for another but I need to get up early and work on the bird."
B.J. blinked rather shocked. "You actually like it?"
"I've had far worse." she mentioned and went to her cot to make the bed for the evening.
B.J. looked at Hawkeye as the two men debated what they thought of Eddy Winchester. Hawkeye stated, "Too bad Eddy isn't a doctor."
B.J. asked, "Why you say that?" He had an inkling of what Hawkeye would suggest.
"We keep Eddy and send Charles to go fly choppers." he suggested.
Eddy shook her head, "Our uncle tried to teach him to fly but he just didn't do very well." She removed Tom's hat and brushed it off of any dust. She placed it neatly by the cot. She then took off her jacket and hung it up on a nearby hook.
Charles then barged through the door carrying a privacy screen he gathered from the medical supply tent. He marched it right over to Eddy's cot and stood it up to block Hawkeye and B.J.'s view.
Hawkeye and B.J. both stood shocked and befuddled as Eddy's shoulders sank defeated.
Hawkeye asked, "What are you doing?"
Charles sneered at the men. "Privacy!"
B.J. cocked is head baffled by the move. "We were just talking with Eddy. He's a neat guy. What are doing that for?"
Charles stumbled for he couldn't let out the truth. He paused and looked rather nervous and glanced at Eddy who stood smirking at him.
"Oh' I get it." Hawkeye assessed. "He's jealous of his brother and doesn't want us to hang around him."
In Charles mind he had no choice but to let Hawkeye make such an assumption though he was half correct. He was not jealous of Eddy but certainly did not want his adventurous sister hanging around the two doctors as he feared the pair would be a bad influence on her. Thus, Charles came up with the most idiotic excuse. "We're Winchesters!" he declared. "We don't associate with such buffoonery."
Eddy then reached for the privacy screen and pushed it closed, allowing her to see the tent once more. She disagreed. "Sure we do. Winchesters are just full of buffoonery."
"Keep that privacy screen up." he demanded.
"Relax." she rebutted. "I was in the RAF for almost two years and flew 15 missions on the bomber." She rolled her eyes annoyed and shook her head. "I know how to do this." She referred to passing off as a man and not staying in the tent with her brother and two doctors.
B.J. defended. "Leave him alone, Charles." He laid down on the cot and closed his eyes after a long day.
Hawkeye sat down on his cot as well. "Goodnight Charles. Night Eddy." he told the pair and laid down as well.
Eddy looked on at the two exhausted men. She quietly asked her brother, "How long were you guys operating?"
"Twelve hours straight." he informed. He then pulled the privacy screen out again but not as far. He whispered, "You can't expose yourself here. You can't let anyone find out. I'm not sure father can get you out of it this time."
She assured, "Don't worry about me. If they do find out. You think they will tell?" she wondered for they didn't come across as the type of men who would betray another.
Charles concluded, "No! They would actually help cover you."
"Then why are you so freaked out?" she wanted to know.
"Having your sister sneak into the Army is embarrassing." he told her. "Why not join up as a woman and become a nurse? You could easily do nursing. Matter of fact, you could have easily become a medical doctor. Instead of wasting time and money on that PhD in flight theory."
"Master is flight theory." she corrected. "My PhD is in engineering."
He ignored the information and continued. "We could have been the first brother and sister team of surgeons in Boston." he countered.
"I really can't bring myself to operate on a body. I will puke." she deemed. "You got the cast iron stomach. Not me. I don't do blood and guts. Saw my fill of that on the bomber."
He dreamed, "We could have had our own practice together. Winchester Internal Medicine."
She shook her head. "Winchester flying racing team." she grinned at him.
He rolled his eyes, "That plane of yours is a money pit." He went back to his bunk and then laid down exhausted from the hours of surgery.
She removed her belt and shoes and then laid down on her own cot for the night. She closed her eyes and soon fell fast asleep.
Charles rose from his cot, gathered a blanket and gently placed it over his sister. He then returned to bed.
B.J. noticed the gesture. He found Charles was rather protective of Eddy and he could not understand why for Eddy seemed to have had more military experience than Charles. He wondered what he didn't know.
Morning
Eddy woke up the privacy screen being fully deployed and hence blocking her view. She peeled back the blanket and sat up on the edge of the bed. She rubbed her eyes and then tried to peel off the fake mustache that would not budge. She concluded, "The boys must have played a joke on me with that glue." She slipped on her shoes and rose up and placed on her belt. She retrieved her jacket and then pushed the screen back to close it. She noticed the doctors were already gone. She grabbed Tom's hat and made her way out of the tent to find Charles and see about the chopper in Rizzo's possession.
First Eddy made her way to the mess tent for a cup of coffee. She entered and found Charles sitting at the table with Hawkeye, B.J and the head nurse, Margaret Houlihan.
Margaret found Eddy to be rather short for a man but ironically very good looking. She smiled at the pilot as Eddy gathered her coffee and came to sit at the table with Charles.
"Captain." Margaret greeted. "I'm Major Houlihan. I'm the head nurse."
Eddy asked, "You're hot lips?"
Her blue eyes squinted, "Excuse me?"
"The other pilots were telling me about a head nurse named Houlihan who was nicknamed Hot Lips." she explained. "You're famous!" she stated and took a seat across from Charles.
Hawkeye laughed, "Even the pilots heard of you, Hot Lips."
"Shove it, Pierce." she barked. She tried to gather her wits in light of the news that her reputation preceded her.
Charles looked upon his sister. "You are going to eat something and not just drink coffee."
"I'll eat something." she rolled her eyes annoyed by Charles's mothering. She rose to her feet and went to the line to gather some toast and eggs.
Radar entered the tent next. He looked for Eddy as he had news for her. He walked over to table as he realized she was about done getting her food. "I got a message for Eddy." he stated.
Charles wondered, "What is the message?"
"It's from Major Tom Hardy. It's says he located the parts needed to fix the chopper. It was sent by truck to the motor pool for the 5th battalion, Marines. Says Eddy will need to take a jeep to drive up and get it. He can't risk flying chopper up there. It's too close to the frontline."
B.J. asked, "You mean Eddy needs to drive up closer to the front to get the parts from a Marine motor pool?"
"Appears so." Radar agreed.
Charles stated, "Absolutely not! I will not allow it! You tell that Major that he will have to have the Marines bring the parts here."
"They are in the middle of an offensive." Radar informed. "Captain Winchester needs to get the parts himself."
Charles rose to his feet. "You get that Major on the horn, Radar. I want to speak to him personally."
Eddy came to the table with her food. She noticed Charles seemed very upset. "What's wrong?" she asked.
Radar explained, "I spoke to Major Hardy. He said he located the parts you need and they were sent to a Marine motor pool but you will have to drive there yourself to get them. He can't risk flying a medical chopper there."
"Alright," she nodded. "Tell Tom that I will drive out and get the parts."
"No!" Charles huffed worried she would wounded or killed on the journey.
"You can come with me if you want." she offered to her brother.
"I cannot." he rebutted. "I have to stay here with the wounded."
Radar stated, "Colonel Potter has already ordered Klinger to go with him."
Charles's mouth dropped. "Klinger!" he huffed.
Eddy asked, "Who is Klinger?"
As if on cue and straight out of a theatrical production Corporal Maxwell Klinger entered the tent. He was dressed rather sportingly in a long flowing yellow dress complete with a large straw hat. He marched over to Eddy and saluted. "Corporal Maxwell Klinger. Reporting for duty, Captain." He waited for the surprised look that would surely earn him that section eight. Much to his surprise her lip curled up rather amused as she tried to not laugh at him. He then insisted, "I'm crazy Captain. You can put me in for a section eight."
She shook her head, "Actually I can't. I'm not your C.O."
He begged, "Any officer can do it."
"I really can't." she giggled slightly.
He threw his purse down. "Well that's just great. I got all dress up for nothing."
She bent down picked up the purse. She dusted off the dirt and handed it back to him. "That's a nice handbag. It that Chanel?" she asked about the designer.
"Yes!" he nodded. "You like it?" he found Eddy seemed more laid back than Charles. He noticed similar features between the two including eyes and hair color.
"Love it." she told him amused. Unbeknownst to Eddy, when she told Klinger that she liked his handbag she sounded very feminine. Her audience took notice.
Charles needed to redirect and fast. "Klinger, you will be escorting my brother to a marine's motor pool. There is a sniper running around out there. You are going to get yourself killed in that outfit."
Eddy had to agree, "Yellow is kind of bright. Might want to wear something green."
Klinger stated, "I have just the dress."
"Great." she replied amused. "I'll see you at the jeep."
"Yes sir." he saluted and then turned to go change his clothing upon grasping his purse from Eddy's hands. He marched out with his mind conjuring up his next great outfit.
Eddy looked up at her brother. "I like him. Reminds me of one of the guys from my old bomber crew."
Charles rolled his eyes annoyed. "Eat your breakfast. I don't want you going out there on an empty stomach." he told her.
She agreed, "I'll finish breakfast and then grab a rucksack of rations."
"And a first aid kit." Charles insisted.
"And a first aid kit." She asked, "Sniper, huh?"
Charles nodded concerned.
"I better get my pistol then." she declared.
He asked, "Where is the pistol they issued you?"
"In a lock box in the chopper." she told him.
"Why don't you wear it when you are flying?" he wondered.
"It's on a regular belt. The shoulder holsters hurt. Beside, it's a 45 caliber 1911. I'm not going to shoot back with that. I would need to mount machine guns to shoot back." she determined. "Hmm," she pondered. "I bet I could draw up schematics for a machine gun on a chopper."
"First you need to get that chopper fixed and get it back to your base." Charles reminded her.
"I got it." she assured him. She quickly took a fork full of eggs and washed it down with coffee. She then walked her tray over to the return area. She spoke to the cook. "Sir!"
"That's Igor!" Hawkeye told her.
"Igor!" she called.
The cook looked upon the officer with the funny looking mustache. "Captain."
She complimented, "Good job with the eggs. I like your cooking." In reality she found it to be average military cooking and nothing special.
Igor perked up, "You do?"
"Good job." she repeated and gave him a thumbs up and then turned to leave the mess tent.
Hawkeye soured, "He likes the food here?" Bewildered he and B.J. followed Charles and Eddy out of the tent.
Charles scoffed at the food. "The food here is atrocious, dear brother."
"I know." she agreed.
"Then why did you tell that cook you liked the food?" he demanded to know.
She stopped and looked at her audience. "A little compliment can go a long way. That cook is strung out. Gets nothing but complaints all day. Give him a thank you and little appreciation and he will put more effort into his cooking and you will find the food improving."
Charles disagreed. "Trust me! Nothing can make the food here any better."
"You'll see." she told him.