Reevaluations

It was the wee hours of Monday morning when MacGyver pulled his Jeep into the driveway. A pang of disappointment ripped through him when he saw his apartment shrouded in darkness. Nevertheless, he slowly opened the front door and quietly crossed the threshold, his eyes immediately seeking out his couch. But the blanket-covered form of Joanna he hoped to find was not there. Neither was the sight of Frog lumbering toward him to welcome him home. His hope dimmed but not extinguished, he silently climbed the stairs to find his bed, bathed in moonlight, as empty as the day he had left. He sighed and jammed his fingers through his hair, chiding his selfish thoughts. Joanna had spent the weekend at Challengers, covering for him, no less, and she deserved a good night's sleep in her own bed before returning to teaching after a full week off. Besides, after several years and hundreds of missions, he had most always returned to an empty house without thinking twice about it and often relished the solitude it afforded him to rest and refuel. But after having met and fallen in love with Jo, she had come to fill a spot in his life he didn't realize was empty and a hole in his heart he had kept hidden for too long. Much to his own surprise, he found himself longing for the day when she would become his forever.

A loud, rhythmic pounding pulled MacGyver from a dreamless sleep early the next morning. He looked at his alarm clock and groaned. He had only been asleep for four hours. The pounding continued and Mac pushed himself off his bed which he had fallen into the night before, still fully clothed. He grabbed a light-weight jacket and stepped outside to find Charlie, his landlord, and a man in a suit chatting amicably next to a large wooden sign. The two men soon shook hands and the stranger headed toward a sedan parked on the street.

"Hey Charlie! What's goin' on?"

"Hiya Mac! I didn't want you to find out like this, but you're a hard man to pin down! I've decided to sell the townhouse."

"What?!"

"My son-in-law got a new job back East. My daughter and grandkids are the only family I got so they invited me to go live with them. Since I ain't gettin' any younger and don't care to travel, I figured what the heck! Besides, I can't take care of this place like I used to."

"I'm sure gonna miss ya, Charlie," MacGyver replied, putting his hand on the older man's shoulder.

Charlie grunted with a hint of laughter. "Ya mean your gonna miss the low rent I've been chargin' ya!"

"I didn't mean-" Charlie held up his head, cutting Mac off mid-sentence.

"Don't worry, son. When this place sells I'm puttin' a clause in the contract that your rent stays the same until it's time to renew your lease. You've been a good tenant and even better neighbor. It's the least I could do."

"Thanks Charlie," Mac said before the two men returned to their respective sides of the duplex.

A few hours later, MacGyver was sitting in his office at Challengers, mulling over Charlie's decision to sell the townhouse when Cynthia knocked sharply on his door. She entered before he could issue an invitation.

"Thank goodness you're back! We need to discuss Phoenix's six-month review of Challengers!"

Mac glanced at his desk calendar. He had the day circled in red. March twenty-third, the one-year anniversary of the club...and his birthday.

"Relax. We've got two whole weeks to prepare," he observed.

"That's just it!" Cynthia replied, her voice laden with anxiety. "I was just notified that the date's been moved up to this Friday!"

That got his attention. "What?"

"How will we ever be ready in time?"

Mac had never seen his long-time friend this anxious. He edged out from behind his desk and put his hands firmly on Cynthia's shoulders, hoping to reassure her.

"Hey, it's gonna be okay. This place is running like a well-oiled machine and you and Joanna have the books up-to-date so there's nothin' to worry about, right?" MacGyver reasoned.

"That's what we thought last time and they cut our funding," Cynthia countered.

"That was a budget issue on Phoenix's end, it had nothing to do with Challengers itself."

"I suppose you're right," his friend and mentor sighed. "But you'll make sure Joanna is here as well? We need to make a strong showing regardless."

"I'm sure she wouldn't miss it. Now just relax."

The rest of the day dragged on for MacGyver as Cynthia's concerns niggled at his brain. Feeling restless, he did several walk-throughs of the building searching for areas that could use some extra cleaning or light maintenance, but found none. The place was as ready as it would ever be. He then closeted himself in his office with the ledgers to make himself as familiar as possible with all the financials of the last six months. The numbers began to blur and Mac rubbed his eyes. Looking up, he discovered it was late afternoon and Joanna was walking toward his office. He stood up, stretched out the kinks in his neck and back, and met her in the doorway.

"Welcome back," she greeted him with a smile and quick kiss on the lips. "I thought you'd call when you got home."

"I got in pretty late and didn't want to wake you," he explained as Jo settled herself in a chair across from his.

"So how was the rest of the weekend? Did you find out anything more about Jack's new wife?"

MacGyver plopped down in his chair with a sigh. "Do you want the long version or the short?"

"Oh wow! Is Jack doin' okay?" she asked when he concluded telling her about the events of the past couple days.

"Yeah, I guess," he shrugged. "He seemed fine when I left him at the airport."

Jo frowned. "Maybe you shoulda gone back with him to L.A. for a couple days, just to make sure."

"Aw, don't worry about Jack," he said lightly. "He's probably already knee deep in a scheme to buy a bigger and better plane. Besides, it's lucky I got back when I did." He glared pointedly at the books laid out in front of him.

"What's going on?" Joanna asked, her brow creased with confusion.

"Cynthia got word today that Phoenix needed to move up our review to this Friday. They didn't say what time they're coming so I was hoping you could take the day off to be here for it."

Jo lowered her eyes and Mac's stomach did a funny little flip...and not the good kind. "What is it?" he asked.

"I was told today that Mrs. Varga needs to meet with me Friday to do my annual review. Since it's only my first year there I really can't ask her to reschedule."

"Well, what time is it at? Maybe we could work around it?"

Joanna bit her lip and his stomach rebelled once more. "I don't know for sure. She said it would either be during my morning prep period or after school." She finally raised her eyes to meet his gaze. "I'm sorry, Mac, but I can't be here Friday. But you'll do great! Cynthia knows more than I do anyway and the club has been doing well. You don't need me."

"I'll always need you," he replied softly, "But I also can't ask you to put Challengers ahead of your job. It's just a case of crummy timing so it's no use worrying about it. I hope your own review goes well."

"Thanks," she replied with a gentle smile.

XXXXX

"I'm sorry, Mr. MacGyver, but I must say I'm very disappointed with what I've seen here today and I can't, in good conscience, recommend that The Phoenix Foundation continue funding your club."

"What?!" Mac exclaimed as he shot out of his chair. He probably would have shot straight through the ceiling had Cynthia not reached across his desk and put a staying hand over his.

Two hours earlier, Mr. Matthews had flashed his ID and introduced himself as a Phoenix representative. Of Mac's approximate age and height, the similarities ended there. Sporting a three piece suit, a too-short haircut, and a too-tight necktie, Mr. Matthews had proceeded to pour over the ledgers before inspecting every nook and cranny of the old building. Afterwards, he spoke with Geena, Rosie, and some of the other adult volunteers as well as some truant teens, most likely homeless, taking advantage of the services the club offered. He then had requested to speak privately to MacGyver and Cynthia once it was established Joanna would not be putting in an appearance.

"Challengers is simply not meeting our expectations. You've been operating for a year now yet have little to show for it."

"That's not true!" Mac protested. "We have a growing number of volunteers as well as members and we're now able to stay open around the clock and act as an emergency shelter for teens or anyone else, for that matter. We've made significant progress!"

"The Phoenix Foundation is not in the habit of funding what amounts to little more than a daycare center. If you want our continued financial support, Challengers needs to be more active in the community. You should have a variety of structured, educational opportunities for after school as well as be initiating outreach programs to include the surrounding neighborhoods, not just be a haven for bored juveniles to spend a few hours playing video games until their parents get home from work."

"There's a lot more going on here and you know it!" MacGyver insisted. "Besides, if Phoenix refuses to fund us, how can you expect us to implement the types of activities you expect?"

Matthews sighed heavily. "The best I can do is recommend that you receive the same amount of funding as last time for six more months and then we'll conduct another review."

Instinctively knowing this was the best outcome he was going to get, MacGyver capitulated. "Thank you, Mr. Matthews. We will give serious consideration to the improvements you've suggested."

Once Matthews had left, Mac and Cynthia collapsed onto a tattered couch in the rec room. Both of them exhausted and frustrated.

"You know he's not wrong," Cynthia stated after several moments of silence.

"I know," MacGyver groaned, scrubbing his face with his hands. "Back in L.A. we had all sorts of programs from teaching kids self-defense to learning about and improving the environment. Matthews is right. We're nothing more than glorified babysitters."

"Please tell me I didn't hear you say what you just said," Geena called as she strode purposefully across the room toward them. "In the short amount of time I've been here I can see that Challengers has been a godsend to these kids and the community. Don't let Phoenix bully you into anything!"

"Cynthia's right," Mac told Geena. "We need to be doing more. It's my fault. I shoulda seen it. Taken more initiative to set up opportunities for the kids to grow and get involved in the world outside these walls."

"Running a club like Challengers isn't easy," Cynthia said with a knowing smile.

"I don't know how you and Booker did it. I respect you guys now more than ever."

"There's no magic formula, Mac," Cynthia assured him. "All you need is a lot of determination and a lot of love."

"Speaking of love," Geena interrupted, "Joanna just pulled into the parking lot."

Cynthia's face immediately brightened. "Oh Mac, Joanna will be a great help! She'll be on summer vacation in a couple months and I'm sure she'll have some wonderful ideas to help grow Challengers. Maybe she can even get some of the other teachers to pitch in!"

MacGyver's heart lightened. Things always seemed better with her around. He was so used to going through life on his own, if felt good to share the burdens and triumphs with someone else. Someone he loved. How he had missed having her by his side these last several weeks. But, as Cynthia pointed out, she'd be back soon enough and together they would be a formidable team. For now, however, the anxiety must have still shown on their faces as Jo stopped short when she entered the room.

"What's wrong?" she asked warily. "Did something happen with the review?"

Mac approached her and put a guiding hand on the small of her back. "Let's go into my office."

Once settled in his desk chair with Joanna seated across from him, he detailed the events of the day including the discussion she had just missed. A lump formed in his throat when she looked up at him, her eyes sad.

"I had my meeting with Mrs. Varga today," she said quietly as MacGyver mentally kicked himself for not remembering. "She really likes me and said a lot of good things. She offered me a full-time position in the fall and would like me to teach summer school."

Mac felt as if he'd just been sucker punched. "You turned her down, though. Right?"

"I told her I'd think about it," she replied, lowering her eyes.

"But I thought you preferred teaching part-time and working summers here?"

"I did. I mean...I do. It's just that it's a really generous offer and I couldn't just tell her 'no'. I have to show that I'm a team player otherwise she might not want be back at all."

"You just said she really liked you," Mac said, confusion furrowing his brow.

Jo sighed. "A school is just like a business. No matter how much anyone likes you, you're still not indispensable. Teachers who take on more responsibilities are simply more valuable."

Mac scrubbed his face with his hands and tried to order his jumbled thoughts. "Look, it's been a long week for both of us. Whaddya say we go to my place, order some pizza, watch some hockey, and forget about life for awhile?"

His muscles relaxed a fraction as Joanna's lips curved in a small smile. "Sounds like a plan."

An hour later, MacGyver pulled into his driveway with Joanna on his tail. He watched as she climbed out of her Chevy and stared at the 'For Sale' sign on his lawn.

"So, this is new," she observed. "When were you gonna tell me about it?"

"I'm sorry, baby. With everything going on at Challengers I forgot. Charlie decided to sell the place and move East with his family. He told me about it on Monday." And this was Friday. How had over a week passed without Joanna coming over to his place?

"That's too bad. I'm gonna miss him," she said sadly, brushing past him on the way to the front door.

Once dinner had been consumed, MacGyver pulled Joanna down beside him on the couch just before the third period face-off. Unlike other evenings, when her very body seemed to melt into his, she was tense and hesitant.

"What's wrong?" he asked, gently kneading her tight shoulder muscles.

"I guess it's just all the stress from this past week," she replied.

"Let's see what we can do about that," he muttered huskily, leaning forward to kiss the tender skin behind her left ear. He heard her sigh and couldn't help but smile. But he soon scowled as the ringing phone broke the peaceful moment.

"Let the machine get it," she murmured.

His response was to shift his attention to the right side of her neck, a smile tugging at his lips once again. The machine beeped. "Dad, pick up if you're there." It wasn't a request, but a command. MacGyver groaned and leaned his forehead against the back of Joanna's head.

"Dad!"

"You better get that," Jo said, pulling away. But the words were hardly out of her mouth before her cell phone began to chime from its place on the coffee table. She scooped it up, glanced at the caller ID, and pointed to the stairs, indicating she would take the call in the bedroom, presumably for privacy.

"Daaad!"

MacGyver grabbed the cordless receiver. "What is it, Sam?!"

"Geez, why're you so upset, Dad?"

Mac pinched the bridge of his nose, willing himself to stay calm...and civil.

"Did I interrupt something?"

"You could say that," MacGyver ground out. "Now what's up?"

"Rebecca's mad at me and I need your advice."

"My advice? Make her unmad at you."

"How do you suggest I do that?"

MacGyver looked longingly up at his lofted bedroom. He was finally alone with Joanna for the first time since before Spring Break and here he was giving relationship advice to his son.

"Well, whatever you did to make her mad in the first place, do the opposite."

"Dad, would you be serious?" Sam scolded. "Besides, I don't think I did anything wrong."

Mac sighed, resigning himself to the fact that this was going to be a longer conversation than he had hoped. "Okay. Tell me what happened."

"A couple nights ago I stayed late at the Tribune to catch up on some work. There was another photojournalist there and we knocked off at the same time. We decided to grab a quick dinner before going home, but we got talking and lost track of time. When I got back, Becca was waiting in my apartment, mad as a wet hen."

"Look, she was probably just worried about you. Why didn't you just apologize?"

"I tried, but…" Sam's voice hung heavy on the line and Mac suddenly heard what his son wasn't telling him.

"Sam, please tell me this other photojournalist was a guy."

"I can't. 'Cause she wasn't. But it's not like Becca and I are exclusive or anything! I'm not like you were, Dad. I haven't had a chance to do a whole lot of dating. And it was just dinner. I don't get what the big deal is?"

"Then talk to Becca. Listen to what she has to say and admit that you were wrong."

"But I don't think I was wrong, Dad!"

"Just trust me on this."

"Sheesh, you're no help," Sam grumbled before hanging up without so much as a good-bye.

Mac plopped down on the couch and looked at the TV screen. Calgary was down by two goals midway through the third and final period. Terrific. Could anything else not go right tonight?

"Do you have any idea what your son just did?!" Joanna called accusingly from where she was descending the stairs. Mac's chin dropped to his chest and he sighed.

"Does this have anything to do with him having dinner with a fellow photojournalist?"

"A female photojournalist! That was Rebecca and she's devastated. Sam cheated on her!"

MacGyver pushed to his feet and spun to face Jo. "What?! All they did was have dinner together! Sam said he and Becca aren't even going steady so what's the harm?"

"What's the harm?!" Mac winced as Joanna's voice rose. "Becca's falling in love with him and he's out running around with other women!"

"Wait a minute! First of all, one meal does not constitute 'running around'. Second, Sam has spent most of his life just trying to survive. It's only natural for him to want to date around a bit. And third, Becca's too young and inexperienced to know what real love is!"

Joanna visibly bristled and MacGyver knew he had crossed a line somewhere. When she next spoke, her low, calm voice caused the little hairs on the back of his neck to stand up.

"Are you saying that just because you assume Becca hasn't been in any serious relationships that she doesn't know her own feelings?"

"Yeah. I guess I am," MacGyver replied, jamming his fingers through his hair. This conversation was going from bad to worse.

"Then what about me?" Jo asked, her eyes locked with his.

"What about you?"

"I've never been in a serious relationship before but you believe I love you."

"That's different!" Mac objected.

"How?" she challenged. "How is it different? Maybe you were right in the first place. Maybe I'm like Becca and don't know my own feelings because I haven't spent the past twenty-odd years 'gaining experience' like some people in this room!"

Joanna was clearly spoiling for a fight and all Mac wanted to do was turn back time to before Sam and Becca's phone calls. Reaching out, he placed his hands firmly on Jo's shoulders. To his relief, she didn't try to shrug them off.

"Listen. We've known each other for what, three years? Think of everything we've been through together during that time, both good and bad. You are a mature, intelligent woman who definitely knows her own mind. I love you and I know you love me. Or am I the one who doesn't know his feelings?"

Joanna lowered her eyes and scowled. "I hate it when you get all logical and reasonable," she muttered. "And I especially hate it when you're right."

"Are we okay then?"

"Yeah, we're okay."

"Can I kiss you senseless now?" he asked.

"You'd better," she replied with a sly grin and that was all the encouragement he needed.

XXXXX

The coming days passed innocuously enough as everyone settled back into their normal routine. MacGyver made a point of chatting with Challenger members and volunteers to get a feel for the types of programs and activities that would be of most interest and spawn the most participation. With the snow steadily melting and the promise of spring in the air, this was the perfect time for a community clean-up initiative. Joanna also spent more time at Challengers as well as with Mac either at the club or his place. She was still struggling with Mrs. Varga's offer of a full-time teaching position, but MacGyver had stopped asking if she had made a decision once his queries became met with squinty-eyed glares. They both continued to field calls from Sam and Becca, but had agreed to present a united and neutral front to encourage the younger couple to work things out on their own as well as save themselves from projecting the drama onto their own relationship.

The following Sunday, Joanna sat on MacGyver's couch, her legs curled underneath her as she leaned against him, sharing a bowl of popcorn as they watched one of the final hockey games of the season. Much to Mac's dismay, the Calgary Flames' season would soon be coming to an end with no playoff hopes in sight. He had just shoved a handful of popcorn into his mouth when Jo snuggled closer and looked up at him with a sweet smile she tended to save for special occasions.

"Do you know what tomorrow is?" she asked innocently.

"Monday?" he mumbled with his mouth full.

"What else?" she prodded.

He held back a smile of his own as he knew what she was trying to get at, but not before he had a little fun first. "Mmm, the first anniversary of the grand opening of Challengers?"

She chuckled and slapped him playfully on his jean-clad thigh. "No! It's your birthday!"

"Oh really? I forgot all about it," he replied, failing to contain the grin spreading across his face.

"Now, I know you don't like surprises or presents, but I was thinking we could get dressed up and go out to a fancy restaurant for a nice meal to celebrate. How does that sound?"

"Depends," he replied, nuzzling the curve of her neck. "What's for dessert?"

"Ice cream," she whispered huskily.

"Count me in."

XXXXX

MacGyver was shrugging into his sport jacket when Joanna walked through his front door at six o'clock on the dot Monday evening.

"Ooh, a tie. I'm impressed," she declared with a saucy grin as she took inventory of him from head to toe.

"Well, I figured since it was a special occasion and all...Besides, you don't look half bad yourself."

Beneath her unbuttoned dress coat, Jo had donned a modest yet flattering black knit dress that she accessorized with a chunky gold necklace and matching earrings. Her soft brown eyes were enhanced with tastefully applied make-up, and her wine-colored lips had MacGyver wishing they had decided to stay in for a cozy dinner instead.

"Where to?" he asked, grabbing his keys from the hook beside the door.

"Oh, no," she scolded gently, plucking the keys from his hand and returning them to their proper place. "I'm driving and it's a surprise. Trust me on this, Mac." And oddly enough, he did.

Twenty minutes later, Joanna pulled up to the canopied entrance of a small gourmet restaurant in downtown Milwaukee. She relinquished the coupe to a valet before giving her name to the maître de who proceeded to guide them through the dimly lit dining room. Mac's eyes fell upon a table for two tucked away in a corner, but Joanna continued to follow the man to a larger table where another couple sat, their backs to him. He gently grabbed the back of her dress to halt her progress.

"Where's he taking us?" Mac whispered in her ear. She only straightened her spine, held her head high, and continued to follow the man who had now come to a stop beside the already occupied table.

The maître de pulled out a chair and Joanna smiled her thanks as she sat down. MacGyver was about to protest when he suddenly recognized the man and woman seated across from them.

"Nikki? Bannister? What're you doin' here?!"

"We're here to celebrate your birthday," Craig said, rising to embrace Mac in a manly hug...if there was such a thing. Nikki was next to greet him.

"We had some meetings at the Phoenix branch in Chicago this past weekend and have a few hours until our flight. We called Joanna earlier this week and asked her to set this up," Nikki explained.

"Well, it's great to see you guys," Mac said, smiling widely as he settled into his well-cushioned chair.

"We also have another surprise," Nikki said, glancing shyly at Craig. "We're married!" She held out her left hand to show off her gold band as proof.

"What?! No way!" MacGyver exclaimed. "You said you were gonna take it slow!"

"That's what we had planned," Craig shrugged. "But a couple months ago Nikki was on a mission that really went south in a hurry. We decided that in our line of work you have to make the most of every moment you're given so why waste time? What's keepin' you guys from pulling the trigger?"

Mac felt Joanna stiffen beside him. He slipped his hand under the tablecloth and rested it on her thigh, giving her a comforting squeeze.

"Some of us actually follow the plans we set," he replied.

"Since when, Mr. Improvisation?!" Nikki scoffed.

"That's always bugged you, hasn't it?" MacGyver playfully replied. "Remember our first official assignment together?

Nikki rolled her eyes. "How could I ever forget?" she groaned, before turning to Joanna and launching into the story. "So Pete drags me all the way to Zurich to meet up with MacGyver who's in some stupid hot air balloon rally with this little Swiss miss. What was her name? Helga? No. Hilga? No. Heidi! That's it! H-e-i-d-i...Heidi! Anyway, a top-secret prototype military plane had crashed in East Germany and Pete thought it would be easier for Mac to cross the border if we posed as newlyweds on our honeymoon. MacGyver, of course, was totally against it because it was an actual plan. But it's a good thing I was there 'cause I ended up saving his life!"

"Whoa, wait a minute! You did not save my life!"

"Yes I did! And I nearly lost mine to hypothermia climbing that stupid mountain to warn you that the bad guys were on your tail!"

"Okay, fine! I'll give you that one. But who got us out of the country without getting killed?!"

"I can give credit where credit is due," Nikki replied, once again turning to Jo. "Can you believe this one used supplies from an abandoned barracks to make an honest-to-goodness hot air balloon? It worked great, too, until we ran out of fuel. Then he decided to lighten the load which included me!"

"You were the only one wearing a parachute!"

"And who gave it to me?!"

"Time out, you two," Craig interrupted with a laugh. "MacGyver wouldn't have even been there if I hadn't rescued him while he was still with the DXS."

Mac groaned and leaned back in his chair as he watched Bannister gear up to tell the tale.

"He had just finished a mission in East Germany," Craig began, "and had the cops on his tail when I pulled up in a borrowed police car. Everything was going fine until they started firing at us. One of the bullets hit the brake line. I tried everything to slow us down, but nothing worked. Then Mac gets this idea to pump the power steering fluid into the brake cylinder. Thing is, we're going down this winding hill at over eighty-five miles per hour! He tells me to pop the hood and the thing goes flyin' off! Then he climbs out the window, does his thing, and voila! Suddenly we have brakes!" He turned his attention back to MacGyver. "Those were the good ole days, hey buddy? Guess you don't get much of a chance to do that kinda stuff anymore, huh?"

"No. And I'm not complaining," Mac assured him.

"That's too bad," Craig said, his voice now serious. "After we got married, Nikki decided to take an assistant director position at the Foundation so she wouldn't have to travel as much. I'm in dire need of a top notch foreign operative and I can't think of a better man for the job."

"I can't Bannister. My life is here now."

"Aw, c'mon, I know you gotta miss the job at least a little. And I'm sure Joanna wouldn't mind moving out to L.A. where it's sunny and warm all year round."

"No way! I'm done!" MacGyver insisted. "Besides, even if I wanted to come back I probably still couldn't pass concussion protocol."

It appeared that Craig was about to mount a protest when the alarm on his watch sounded. He looked down and frowned. "Wow, time really got away from us! I hate to cut the evening short, but if we don't leave now we'll miss our flight."

Everyone at the table rose to say their goodbyes. Mac shook Craig's hand as he patted him on the back before giving Nikki a hug and kiss on the cheek. Bannister gave Joanna a light hug before Nikki squeezed her tight.

"It was great to finally meet you in person! I'm so glad MacGyver finally found someone to love," she told Joanna. "I hope you know what a great guy you have here. No matter what I might've said tonight, he really is a very special man."

Just as Craig and Nikki took their leave, a waiter appeared at the table.

"Can I get you anything for dessert?" he asked.

"I don't suppose you have any ice cream?" Mac ventured.

"Only in the baked Alaska, sir," came the haughty reply.

XXXXX

Joanna was unusually quiet during the ride home. When she entered his apartment, instead of tossing off her coat and kicking off her heels like usual she simply walked over to the kitchen table and perched on the edge of one of the wooden chairs. Setting the small carton of strawberry ice cream they had picked up at a nearby convenience store, MacGyver figured she had simply been a bit overwhelmed at dinner.

"You sure you don't want any?" he asked her as he scooped the ice cream into a bowl.

She shook her head. "I prefer vanilla."

"I told you we could've gotten both."

"That's okay," she replied softly.

Something was obviously wrong and Mac was determined to get to the bottom of it, but he couldn't help glancing at his answering machine as he made his way to the table. He frowned when there was no blinking light indicating a missed call.

"What's the matter?" Joanna asked.

Mac sat down across from her and scrubbed his face with his hands. "I've been calling Jack all week and haven't been able to get a hold of him and he hasn't called back. I'm getting worried."

"You know Jack," she replied, her eyes softening. "He's probably already got a new plane and is off on some grand excursion somewhere."

"You're probably right," Mac sighed, wishing he was as certain as Jo seemed to be.

"Maybe you should go out to L.A. and check on him if you're really that concerned," Joanna suggested.

MacGyver looked up and caught her gaze. That certainly came out of the blue! So had the empty, hopeless look in her eyes.

"What's going on with you?" he asked. "You were quiet all during dinner and haven't been yourself since."

"I think it's time you go home, Mac," she told him flatly, without emotion.

"I am home," he replied, reaching across the table to take her hand which she promptly pulled away.

She slowly shook her head. "You may think that now, but you belong back in Los Angeles with your friends and the Phoenix Foundation."

"What are you saying?" Mac's head began to spin and he felt as if he might lose his supper.

"I saw the way your eyes lit up when Craig asked you to go back. It was only for an instant, but it was there."

"I don't wanna go back! Besides, like I told Bannister, I probably couldn't pass the physical."

"Don't you see?" Joanna said, her voice growing stronger. "That's what brought you here in the first place and the reason you decided to stay."

MacGyver jammed his fingers through his hair in both frustration and fear of where this conversation was leading.

"I may have come here on an assignment, but I stayed because I fell in love with you."

"Mac, guys like you don't fall in love with girls like me. At least not for the long haul. You need to be out saving the world with a paperclip and gum wrapper," Jo said sadly. "You were lonely and I was available. It's as simple as that."

"C'mon, you know that's not true!" MacGyver protested urgently. "Where is all this coming from?"

"Tonight, watching you with Craig and Nikki and listening to their stories, I realized there is so much I don't know about you."

"It doesn't matter! That's ancient history! You know everything that matters."

"And it's not the first time I've felt like that," Joanna confessed.

Mac was truly at a loss for words now. He watched as her eyes scanned the room refusing to meet his.

"Sometimes when I look at you I'm overwhelmed by what an incredibly strong, handsome, confident man you are and can't even begin to imagine all the places you've been and the experiences you've had. I don't know how you could ever be happy with a plain, naive girl like me who's lived in the same city...the same house all her life. You don't deserve to be saddled with me. You should be with someone like Nikki. Someone who's shared similar experiences and won't hold you back."

MacGyver leaned forward, closing the space between them. "I don't want someone like Nikki. I want you. I love you. I proposed to you. And you accepted because you love me, too."

"I was wrong to agree to marry you and I'm sorry. You were right when you said there's no way I could know what real love is."

"I did not say that! And just for the record, before I met you, I didn't know what real love was either! Yes, I've been with a lot of women, but none of them ever made me feel the way you do. I always thought I was afraid of commitment because I was afraid of losing someone I loved. Now that I have you, I know I was afraid to commit to anyone else because somewhere deep down I knew it wasn't right. I know my feelings for you, Joanna, and I know they're not gonna change. And if they do, they're only gonna get stronger and better. Don't ever question that."

Tears pooled in Jo's eyes but her jaw remained set. "I'm sorry, Mac. I want to believe you. I really do! But there's this part of me that just can't see a future for us. I feel that by me marrying you I'd somehow be taking away a part of what makes you so special, and I can't do that. I don't want to do anything that would keep you from being you."

MacGyver didn't know what to do. He knew what he wanted to do. He wanted to knock some sense into that hard head of hers. Tell her she was wrong. Convince her that getting married was the right thing to do. He also knew that she was not ready to hear, much less believe, that. He had to be patient. Let her work through whatever she needed to work through.

"What do you need me to do?" he asked, his voice raspy from suppressing his own emotions.

"I need time...away from you. I need to think. Figure out where I belong in your life...if I belong in it at all."

"That's why you told me to go see Jack."

She nodded.

Suddenly feeling restless, Mac pushed back his chair and stood up, Joanna following suit.

"Please try to understand," she implored. "There's an old saying that says 'If you love something, set it free'. That's what I'm trying to do. I'm trying to give you the freedom to live the life you deserve."

Struggling to keep his emotions in check he rounded on her, grabbing her hands before she could pull them away.

"That saying goes on to say that 'If it comes back to you, it's yours.' I'll leave for L.A. tomorrow. But know this. I am coming back. And when I do, we are gonna work this out. Together. Understand?"

She nodded and turned toward the door but not before he saw an errant teardrop slide down her cheek. He watched as she got into her car and drove off into the night, his heart shattering into so many pieces that all the duct tape in the world couldn't fix it.

A/N: Dear readers, due to the fact that real life has gotten in the way of my writing, not to mention my characters getting themselves in quite a fix in this chapter, I am putting this story on hiatus until Labor Day 2019. Hopefully a summer free from the pressure of posting every other week will allow my creativity to flow and I can continue to produce quality chapters. Thank you for your faithfulness in reading my story. Even though I won't be posting, I will check back weekly (if not more) to read and respond to any reviews or PM's. If you haven't already, you may want to choose to "Follow" this story so you are notified when I begin posting again. Thanks again for your readership and have a wonderful summer!