New Beginnings: Life Changes

ch. 11/12

Finding Courage

A week after the rodeo, Rob decides it is time to broach the subject of Mr. Campbell's job offer with his Pa. Having thought out how best to go about this, he decides to include Delphie in the discussion in hopes of having her as a buffer. Rob is not at all confident his Pa will see his side in this matter.

"Pa, Delphie, would you both come upstairs with me, please? I wish to talk to you in private." Rob asks as the family finishes their supper.

Having seen signs of his eldest son struggling with something since the rodeo came through Paradise, Ethan is relieved to hear the boy wants to talk.

Addressing the three other boys, he says "Joseph, Ben, George you three do your kitchen chores and then entertain yourselves inside. Stay downstairs." He adds the last direction when Ben states he is old enough to be included in private talks.

"But Pa! You told us it was not nice for a family to keep things from each other unless it was a good secret like a gift. Is this about gifts, Rob?"

"Ben! Your brother does not have to explain himself to you!" Ethan scolds the determined eleven year old sternly. "What I actually said was: a family shares good times and bad without excluding anyone. Whatever this is about may be discussed as a family when the time is right. Until then, you boys will respect Rob's privacy and not badger him. Understood?"

"Yes sir." Ben answers frowning as his brothers echo "Yes Sir!"

After his parents and Rob go upstairs, Ben complains to George, Why does Rob get to keep secrets and we don't? Pa makes us tell him everything when we try to keep something private! It is not right!"

"Ben, your secrets, as you think of them, are mostly about something you did wrong. Pa already knows about it but makes you confess. I do not think Rob has done anything to confess."

"I can go find out for us. I can sneak upstairs and listen."

"Go right ahead, Ben. Do not come to me after Pa takes you out to the barn and sets your butt on fire! Eavesdropping will only lead to a burning backside. Besides, he told us to stay downstairs remember?" Joseph reminds his now scowling brother.

Upstairs, Rob is explaining how he met Mr. Campbell.

"He approached me and asked if I would be willing to join his cattle drive. I am good with cattle and could use the money I would make to put towards my house."

"What do you know of this man? How about his team? Do you know any of his workers? Cattle drives are full of men who are older than you. Many drink, gamble and other vices you are forbidden to pursue. I don't think this is appropriate for a young man such as yourself. Do you even know much about cattle drives, son?"

"I met him at the rodeo events. His name is Luke Campbell and he owns a cattle ranch named the Campbell Cattle Company. His sons work with him. They were the ones who set up the rodeo. I have worked cattle before. When I was fourteen, I spent six weeks on a cattle ranch. Uncle Vern hired on as a hand and I worked alongside him. I have the know how. I just need to be there with the cattle to prove myself. I would not be breaking the rules you set. Please may I go? He is planning to swing through next week and I can meet him then."

"Rob, I don't feel this is the right job for you. We will find something else, something less dangerous."

"Less dangerous? You live with danger everyday as a sheriff and exgunslinger! Plus training untamed horses! You can not be meaning to say I would be in more danger than you!" Rob protests.

"I am a grown man not a boy. I know how to handle myself as I have had more years than you. Showing disrespectful behavior by raising your voice to your parents is not how to convince us you are ready for this responsibility."

"Pa, I apologise but just listen to me. I am nearly eighteen, engaged to be married in the Fall. I will take this job."

"YOU listen to ME!" Ethan commands angrily ignoring Delphie's quiet "Keep your temper, Ethan."

"I know exactly how old you are, young man. You forget that in the eyes of the law you are not grown until you reach twenty one. Also, as long as you live in this house you will abide by what I tell you! You do not dictate to me what you will do! Am I understood?"

"Yes sir, I understand. But, you have not really taken time to think this through. You are already saying you will not let me go." Rob says dejectedly. "You tell us to never make hasty choices, to think through options before making a final decision."

"Yes, that is true. I do say that. Alright, Robert, I will give you my final answer, Wednesday. Two days from today. There will be NO more argument as my decision will be final." Ethan replies thoughtfully.

"Yes sir. Thank you for taking time to consider my request." Rob replies settling back against the headboard.

"You're welcome. Good night to you. I assume you are going to remain here rather than join the boys downstairs."

"I am. I don't feel up to boisterousness from Ben tonight so good night to you both."

Lingering behind her husband on the pretense of checking something in Claire's room, Delphie tells the forlorn young man "Chin up, Rob. All is not lost. I will talk to your Pa. I see how much this means to you. He will see it too."

"He thinks of me as a young boy, a child. I am not a child! I am already a man."

"I will speak to him. Good night."

"I appreciate your help. Have a pleasent evening. Claire is working the clinic night shift so she isn't home yet." Rob replies.

"I am aware of this. I needed a quick reason to stay to speak with you as your Pa was leaving."

Downstairs, the three other boys are finished with their chores and taking time to relax. Joseph has lost himself in his newest dime novel enjoying the adventure story. Ben has challenged George to a checkers game and is planning his move.

"Ben! You have stared at the board a long time. Are you going to move a checker?" George asks as he restacks the black wooden circles he captured from Ben.

"I will move when I am ready. I am not ready yet."

"Fine! Sit and stare at the pieces. I need to use the w.c. anyway. I'll be right back. Do make a move soon."

Taking advantage of his brother's absence, Ben picks up two of the red checkers, moving his black checker into position.

Sitting back down, George immediately frowns at his brother. "Ben, there is not a way for you to have jumped all the way here. Your checker was only out one line. You are not playing fair!"

"I am so!"

"Joseph! Ben is trying to cheat!" George complains.

"Shhh, I am reading. Work it out yourself."

"I did not cheat! Fine, I won't even play! You called me a cheater!" Ben says angrily before flinging the gameboard off the small table.

"Ben! Stop acting like a brat. You did cheat so you are so a cheater." George answers, hands on hips.

Before Joseph can speak, Ben has George pinned to the floor sitting on him.

"I do NOT cheat. You take it back!"

"No! You did cheat! You also didn't do your share of the dishwashing! We agreed to each wash one pot and three plates. You only did one plate! I did the rest!" George retorts angrily.

"As long as it got done, what does it matter?" Ben asks from his position on his brother's legs.

"It matters young man because you are told to help with chores not push them off on someone else. Get off of him! You know you are not to act roughly with each other! Both of you stop this right now!" Both boys jerk in surprise, hearing Ethan's stern voice.

"Joseph! You are to be looking after your brothers not allowing a near fight."

"You did not tell me I was in charge. I was letting them find a way to solve this. They argued over the game and then Ben threw the board off the table." Joseph replies now sitting up on the bench.

"Ben? What is the reason for this behavior? You are not showing good sportsmanship."

"George called me a cheater! I did not cheat! If he thinks I don't play fair, I won't play!"

Giving Ben a look, Joseph asks "What would you call moving your checker all the way across when there was no opening? I saw you do so when George was out of the room. Don't deny it."

Facing his other brother now, with his fists balled on his hips, Ben glares as he commands:

"You just keep your big mouth shut, Mr. Nosy Britches! You don't know anything!"

"Benjamin! You know better than to speak to your brother this way. Did you do as your brothers have said with your part of the chores and then the game?"

"They are picking on me! They just want to be mean to me!" Ben answers avoiding his Pa's stern look.

"Look me in the eyes! Answer my question." Ethan replies in his no nonsense voice

"I didn't mean to. It just happened." Ben answers shooting a pleading look to his mama who has joined the group.

"Not doing your part of the chores is unacceptable. We share the jobs and work together. When one deliberately decides to shirk their responsibility that causes unnecessary work for everyone else. Not playing fair and being too rough is also not allowed as you well know. As for your reply of "Not meaning to." that is not true. You decided to behave this way. Your actions were not uncontrollable. You broke several rules tonight and you are aware of it. I reminded you yesterday of the consequences for lying and skipping some of your chores when you failed to fill the woodboxes. You tried telling your Mama you forgot. That was not true as she reminded you three times of the chore. That is lying and avoiding your chores. You just chose to do both again tonight."

Watching Ben's face as he listens to their Pa, Joseph feels a little sorry for his young brother. A public scolding is embarrassing but what is about to happen is far worse.

"Come with me, Ben. You and I are going to have a discussion of lying and disobedience." Ethan tells the child as he firmly leads the boy to the side door.

"Is this really necessary, Ethan? Wouldn't a stern talk and extra chores be enough?"

"Not this time, Delphie. He knew what he was doing. This has happened before , just yesterday as well, and he was made aware of the consequences should it happen again. I will not tolerate willfull disobedience. Everyone, stay inside."

Exchanging looks of slight regret, George and Joseph both tell Delphie "good night" and go to their rooms.

At breakfast the next morning, Claire us telling her mother how she was able to help with a delivery the night before.

"Dr Amy let me catch and clean the baby! She had a boy and he is named David. I got to watch everything and the birth was beautiful. It took her hours before she pushed him out. I love going along on these calls. Mrs. Ketchum said I made a good nurse. Dr, Amy is lending books to me to study as well as teaching me. I love helping people."

Before Ethan or Delphie can respond, Joseph speaks up looking straight at his sister.

"I, for one, am very relieved to hear you want to help people, Claire. We have all of these dishes to wash and the other kitchen clean up to do. You let Rob do the cooking this morning so you can help clean."

"Of course, Joseph. I will do my share." Claire replies with a withering look to her grinning brother.

"Claire, although I am pleased with your enchantment with helping Dr. Amy, I must insist you not discuss details of some of them, such as birth, during our family mealtime. Your mother would be happy to discuss your experiences in private, I am quite sure. There are a few things young boys do not need to know yet." Ethan reminds his daughter quietly.

"I understand even if I disagree. Having a baby enter the world is a natural and beautiful experience. Everyone should know about birth no matter how old they are."

"Papa? Just how do babies get into their mama's tummy to begin with? How did aunt Linnea get that big baby inside her? Her tummy is so big she cannot see to put on her shoes. Uncle Matt told Sarah to be in charge of the fastening of the buttons on the shoes. Sarah told him their mama doesn't fit her shoes anymore and they need bigger ones. They talked about it in the General Store last week when I was picking up fabric for Mama. They were talking right near me so I heard."

"George, women who are getting into the time closest to having the baby, often have swelling in their hands and feet. It is normal." Delphie answers, deftly ignoring the original question.

Turning to Ethan, Rob changes the subject by asking "What will we do with the chestnut gelding? He has refused all attempts to gentle him. He refuses to accept anything being placed on his back. I have done my best, Pa."

"I know you have,son. We will let the Army decide what to do as the animal belongs to them."

"Pa? Why don't we take him to the canyon to be free with the other wild horses?" Joseph asks hoping to get permission to carry out his plan.

"The animal is the property of the Army. I just said that, son. We will return it to them even if we can not gentle him. We have three weeks before the men return to collect their horses. They sent a telegram extending the time before returning to retrieve the group. We will continue to work with the chestnut until they do return. There will be NO trips to the canyon with or without a horse."

Two days later, after returning early from his day at work, Ethan asks Rob to take a walk with him.

"Son, I have asked you to come talk with me this way as your mother and I have made a decision. She has put up quite the argument in your favor, I want you to know. I understand her argument but I am still having difficulties with my decision. I just do not feel you are ready for such an endeavor."

Trying to keep his facial expression and tone of voice even, Rob says "Pa, please, I am..." before he is silenced by Ethan raising his hand to have him stop talking.

"Rob, hear me out before you have your say. As I said, I have reservations about this but Delphie feels strongly that I should give permission. Therefore, you have permission to go on this cattle drive. I expect you to obey our family rules and also to send telegrams at least twice along the way. Letters would arrive at the same time as you if you return in six weeks or less. Are we agreed?"

"Yes Sir! I agree! Thanks Pa! You won't have reason to worry. I know what to do to keep safe. I will keep in touch as well. Thank you for allowing me to prove myself!"

"You are welcome. Be sure to thank Delphie as well. She makes a strong debater when she is defending her position."

Working at the table kneading bread dough to bake, Delphie lets out a small shriek when someone lifts her from behind.

"Shh! Calm down before Pa comes in with his gun at the ready! It is just me. I apologize for scaring you. I came to thank you. Pa is allowing me to go on the drive and he said you convinced him to let me go."

"Rob! You scalawag you, sneaking up on me this way! You need a lesson young man. Hand me that wooden spoon!"

"Delphie...come on... I said I was sorry!"

"You should have seen your face when I spoke of the spoon! I had you believing didn't I? You just whined almost as well as Ben does when he is in trouble! Serves you right for going off and leaving us the way you plan to do. You just come back safely young man or a spoon will be the last thing you will need to fear!"

Grinning back at his feisty redheaded stepmother, Rob raises his hand to his head to imitate a military salute while snapping his heels together with a crisp "Yes Ma'am!"

"I do thank you. Pa listened to you and is realizing I am not a little kid anymore. I am grown up now."

"Do keep yourself safe and come back whole. Your Pa loves you and watching his children grow up to go out in the world without him is extremely difficult for him. He means well with his rules, you know that right?"

"I do when he is not imposing them on me! Hi, Joseph." Rob replies, greeting his brother.

"I heard what you said. I was just in the front room when you came in. You didn't see me. Are you actually going to leave? Just like that?" Joseph exclaims snapping his fingers while scowling at his brother.

"Pa is allowing me to join the drive if that is what you mean. I will be back ,just not for a month or so. What has you in such a snit? You knew I was planning on asking permission to join the drive."

"You were to ask to take me! You didn't!"

"Joseph, there is no way Pa is going to allow you to go. You are fourteen which is two years younger than the allowed age. He barely agreed to me going! If you want to go, ask him yourself. I have a fence to check, see you at supper." Rob answers as he turns to leave.

"That is great. Go off and leave me to negotiate all alone! Some help you are!"

Ignoring Joseph's temper, Rob closes the door behind him.

"Mama, you'll talk to Pa for me won't you? You did it for Rob."

"This is something you need to talk over with your Pa yourself. Rob did not ask me to approach your Pa with his plans. He spoke to both of us together. If you wish to go, discuss it with your Pa. I believe he is working out in the barn. He said he was going to check over some older tack this afternoon."

After pacing back and forth in front of it five times, Joseph gathers his courage and enters the barn.

"Pa?" He calls not finding Ethan in the tack room.

"Out here, son." He hears on the far side of the back doors. Opening one of the large doors, he finds his Pa seated on a stump with harnesses piled around him.

"Take a seat and help me oil these leather harnesses, Joseph. You look troubled. What's on your mind?"

"When are the boys and Claire coming back from town?"

"Claire will be home by eight. She is dining with Alex tonight. Your brothers are to be home by five today. That will be about an hour and a half. Why do you ask?"

"Just wondering." Joseph answers shifting on the ground.

Watching the boy squirm and stare at the harness instead of wipe the oil into the leather, Ethan puts down his own work to look directly at the boy. "Alright son. Out with it! Is there something you need to tell me? Have you done something?"

"No sir, I want to ask something."

When the boy continues to sit with the harness, Ethan says "Joseph, whatever it is I promise to listen to you before speaking. You know you can ask me anything. Now what is weighing on your mind?"

"The cattle drive. Rob is going to be leaving. I want to go with them. I am old enough to go along. May I go too?"

"Joseph, you are fourteen. I believe the minimum age to go on this drive is sixteen."

"You could tell Mr. Campbell that I am sixteen though. Even if you didn't he would let me come with your permission. His sons work with him. I can do the work. You know I could."

"Joseph, you aren't sitting there suggesting I lie to someone are you? You are fourteen and that is too young to go on this or any other cattle drive. The answer is no. You will be needed here."

Furious at being denied a chance to go, Joseph throws the harness in the dirt as he stands. "You always put Rob first! He gets to do whatever he wants but I am always too young. You don't care what I want!"

"Listen to me, young man. Do not raise your voice to me! Calm yourself and pick up that harness! You know better than to behave this way. I will not discuss this when you are in this temper. Simmer down."

"No! YOU LISTEN!I I want to go..." is all Joseph gets out before finding himself on the receiving end of two powerful swats to his backside.

"You will speak and act respectfully or we can continue this discussion inside the tack room. You choose. You must accept my decision. You may be angry but you will not be disrespectful by shouting at me. Now are you ready to act your age or do we need to take this inside?"

"I apologize for shouting. May I go to my room?"

"I appreciate your apology and yes that is the best place for you right now. I will talk to you more later when you are ready to listen."

Instead of going to his bedroom as he said, Joseph climbs the stairs to the second floor. Passing his brother and sister's rooms he opens the door to the attic storage room. Curling up in a far corner he lets the tears that have been building, fall.

"I am old enough to gentle horses, help build on to the house, do ranch chores and run errands but I am too young for real jobs. All I am is a free laborer around here. I AM old enough! I will show them I am capable of tasks men can do! Just wait! I'll show Pa!" Joseph mumbles quietly. His brothers and sister are out of the house but he is taking no chance on being overheard.

Waking with the dawn, Rob dresses quietly, picks up his new knapsack and goes downstairs. Slicing four large slices of bread, he wraps them in paper adding smoked ham to the packet. Finding a note on the table addressed to him, he reads "Dear Rob, I suspect you will be up and away early as we all said our goodbyes last night. Delphie says take your coat and thick gloves not just some food. If you look in the pulley pantry she has a bottle of cold buttermilk and a bag of food fixed. Take care son and avoid temptation. We will look forward to hearing from you. Love, Pa."

Having gathered the food and pulled on his boots, Rob heads for the barn. Saddling his horse and tying his belongings behind the saddle, he leads her out. Mounting and taking a quick glance back at the home he helped build, Rob sets out to meet the crew of the drive.

Waiting in the dense trees for his brother, Joseph yawns. Wondering why everyone begins exciting adventures before it is really daylight, he sees Rob coming. Ducking his head and remaining still he waits until his brother has been past to the count of two hundred before easing his horse out of the trees. Staying back far enough to not be recognized, Joseph follows Rob.

A/N: Thank you everyone for being patient while I recovered from surgeries and rehabilation of this broken ankle. Things are much better and I finally rejoined the fan fiction world. I missed it! I hope to hear from all of you again. Also since I put a previous note up and fan fiction called it ch.11 I had to reload this as ch .12. Sorry if you have two notices.