Day 5:

Ascella Fuhari, 15
District 8 Female

I didn't sleep very well last night.

I tried my dang hardest, but it was hard. I don't think Hunter had it any better. He's been mopey for nearly a whole day now, mostly working on resetting his trap. It doesn't look like he's having much luck. I stay out of it, because Hunter knows this stuff better than me, and I don't want to bother him. He seems…on edge. That's not a good sign. I don't like seeing people paranoid.

"Okay…think it's reset." Hunter plops down on the bench next to me. "Ugh, fucker kinda did a number on it. We're lucky Messier didn't break the whole thing."
"How are you feeling now?"
"What?"

"About the…" I try to think of a delicate way to phrase things, then decide against it. It seems best to just be honest and upfront with a guy like Hunter. "Killing."
"I'm fine."
"You sure?"
"Yes!"

Hunter scoots away from me. "Ascella, there's no point in getting worked up over it. Messier is dead, and that's it. You don't come back from being dead, obviously. So it's over and we should move on."
"Yes, we can do that. Seems optimal."

"If you think I'm torn up over it, I'm fucking not. Again, it's over. They had it coming, and we honestly did everyone involved a favour. Okay fine, I technically did us the favour."

"I was your cheerleader," I say unhelpfully.
"Yeah. Really couldn't have done anything without your moral support."
"Hey now, everybody needs a cheerleader!"

Hunter doesn't respond, but I do see the corners of his lips briefly turn upwards into the making of a tiny smile.

I like Hunter. Not in like, a romantic way. Never in a million years; romance is just not for me, no sirree! But as an ally and a companion in this strange and scary arena. In another world, I think he and I could try being friends.

Or, more accurately, I'd try to be friends with him.

"Can I help you with the trap next time?" I ask. "Or you can just show me how to set it."
"I'll think about it," Hunter mumbles.
"Really?" I just assumed he'd say no in an instant.
"Hey, don't get all excited. It's not a yes, it's a maybe."

"Well, maybe is good enough for me. It means that you just think you're way too cool for a yes and you'll get back to me in like, a day."
Hunter actually bursts out into laughter, then suddenly regains his control. "Yeah, right. We'll see about that."

"Don't laugh at me! At least I'm trying to find ways for us to pass the time! And get to know each other."
"Why would we wanna do that?" Hunter rolls his eyes. "I feel like you already know too much about me."
"Cause it's the friendly thing to do?"
"And why do you want to be friendly?"

Well, I did say being upfront was the best. "Because you seem upset and I want to try and make you feel better."
"You did?" Hunter asks. For a moment, I think he's being sarcastic again. But no, there seems to be a hint of genuine surprise to his voice.

"Yeah. And since you don't walk to talk about yesterday, I decided to find other things to talk about. But you know, it's okay if you don't wanna talk about certain things. As long as it's not eating you up I suppose."

A snort. "What makes you think it's eating me up?"
"Cause you seem like you're in a bad mood."
"I'm always in a bad mood. I'm not a ray of sunshine like you, okay?"

Hunter sighs loudly, rubbing at his eyes. "Wait. That sounded mean. I just…don't get how you do it sometimes. We may be allies, but you should still think of me as an enemy. And a dangerous one. I killed someone."

"I know that. But there's enough bad stuff in life already and we're dealing with too much of it as it is. I know that sounds kinda vague, but I also know you agree with me."
Hunter lets out a bitter laugh. "Oh, hell yeah. I don't really wanna get into it, but I've seen my fair share of bad shit."
"Exactly. So if life's gonna beat us down, I'd rather face everything with a smile."

Suddenly, Hunter stands up. Oops. Maybe I should've tried a different approach instead. But rather than walking away, Hunter just holds out a hand.

"Come on. I'll show you how to set the trap."

Walker Jeong, 13
District 6 Male

"Okay, so at that point…and get this…it's revealed that the trolls were actually the ones who created Earth!" Vick finishes his story with a hand wave. "Crazy! Blew my mind the first time I read it!"

I sneak a look over my shoulder at Linh, whose brain is clearly firing on all cylinders as she tries to soak in all the details Vick's told her. Something, something, trolls, zodiac, stars? Vick likes stars. Or he likes zodiacs. Or trolls. That's all I've really taken out of the past few days. What Vick talks about does sound interesting, but I find myself zoning out more often than not.

I spear another cantaloupe cube in the fruit salad in my lap. God, this stuff is a lifesaver. Getting fresh fruit and a thermos of hot soup feels like luxury in the arena, even though that would've been just a simple lunch for me at home.

Glancing over my shoulder again, I sneak a few more looks at Vick and Linth. Still talking about zodiac trolls again, even using one of the star maps scattered around the observatory to draw stuff and write notes. Linh draws a little bird. Right. Zodiac trolls or animals. Linh likes animals apparently.

"...I think I'll stop there." Vick yawns. "We'll get into the next act and Cascade later because I am feeling a bit winded. What else do we wanna do?"
"I can tell a story about this family of rabbits I saw in the woods," Linh offers.
"Or we could play chess," I grumble.

It isn't until Vick and Linh suddenly look at me weirdly that I realize I accidentally said that out loud. "I don't know how to play chess," Vick admits. "It looks too complicated."

"You're kidding," I say flatly.
That goes over Vick's head. "I know that the kings only move one spot, but the rest of it, I can't remember."
"No way. Chess is super easy."

Linh shakes her head. "Nah. Checkers is easy. I used to play that with my mom all the time."

Now, this is a debate I've had with tons of people and I know I can win, but most people I debated with on chess usually are not carrying poison or knives in their bags. Might be best to drop it here. "Fair enough. If we ever get sponsored a chess set, I'll teach you guys. You'll see how easy it is."

"Sounds good," Linh tells me. Then she and Vick turn back to their paper. As if they barely noticed I'm even a crucial part of this alliance.

This doesn't feel fair anymore.

This is my alliance and I'm always the one being left out of things! God, it's like Vick and Linh don't even notice I'm here half the time. They're just too busy with each other and I get left out every single time. I bet if I were to walk away and take all the supplies with me, they'd be too busy with each other to even notice that I-

What the heck am I doing?

This stupid. This is so stupid. Nobody's leaving the alliance, not while we're still safe up here. And I'm not feeling jealous, by the way. I have nothing to feel jealous about. I don't care if those two got some kinda stupid crushes on each other. They can leave me out of that and I won't complain at all. Not my problem. The alliance is fine. At some point, we might be forced out of here, and then I can find us a safer shelter. I think I can do it. They'll see then, just how useful I am.

But…I want to be useful now.

I miss my friends back home. I miss my parents and Rhonda. I miss the debate club. I miss the familiarity, the routine, the feeling of being the most important person in the room, of having all eyes on me every once in a while. Even if my parents weren't home all the time, I at least knew they cared. Or I thought I knew. I don't know what's going on with them anymore. I don't know if I want them to tell me, or if I was happier living in pure ignorance thinking that everything was all fine and dandy. It's not, apparently. How could I fix a district that just insists on staying broken?

I just stare at my contorted reflection on the fork, wondering what kind of answers I could gleam from it. I come up with nothing.

Arietis Rammestien, 18
District 2 Male

I have no idea who killed Messier yesterday, but the point is that it wasn't a Career and that's literally our job. Get in here, put on a bloody show, win. And we're very much not doing that. Maybe that's why most of the sponsors don't seem to be on our side.

Granted, we're not hurting for anything. We'll be eating through this food for maybe another week. But…I don't know, I want a sign or something. That there's still people out there who want to see me succeed.

It's my turn to make dinner tonight, since everyone else already had a go. I dump the last of our fresh veggies into the pot and begin to mash them together. Vivian watches from afar for a few moments, then comes to sit down next to me. "Did you peel those tomatoes?"

"No. We don't have any decent sized knives for it. I'm not stabbing my fingers for dinner."
"Oh, you could've told me earlier and then I could help you blanch them"

I sigh a little, not because this is a sore topic or anything, but there's no way to bring it up without looking like a loser. "Vivian, I have no fucking idea how to cook."

She laughs.
"I'm being serious."

After all, I never had a reason to learn. There were a few cooks at the Academy, and they took care of everything. I had zero say in my diet, since the trainers planned everything out for the elite hopefuls, making sure we got our daily nutrients. I had more important things to do with my time. It hopefully won't bite me in the ass now, since my alliance isn't picky when it comes to food. The worst I can do now is give everything food poisoning.

"It may not be much of a consolation," Vivian tells me. "But the food here never would've compared to my mom's anyways. So don't feel too pressured to whip up a five-star course tonight."

"Lucky you," I grumble. Vivian takes the hint and pretends to be more interested in playing with her water bottle instead. I manage to get the veggies into a coldish and slightly chunky soup, or a really sad gazpacho. Good enough.

"We should do it now."
Vivian looks up. "Do what?"
"Break away from the pack."

Before Vivian can argue, I quickly make my points clear. "Nothing is happening here. I think we've combed the entire floor multiple times over and it's not working. As a pair, we can cover more ground faster than as a group and be less noticeable."

"I don't know," Vivian admits. "It might be too early?"
"If not now, when? When Cy and Avonles get themselves taken out and Prism turns on us for standing in their way? What good does that do?"

Vivian chews her bottom lip. "You think we'll be fine."
"We can take care of ourselves and dispatch anyone who tries to cross us. We'll be more than fine."
"Okay." That seems to do it. "Let's get the fuck outta dodge. It's my turn to take the first shift so I'll wake you up when the coast is clear."

Dinner and the rest of the evening passes by uneventfully. Vivian takes the first watch like she said she would. I settle into my sleeping bag and close my eyes. Rest comes hard. My heart is pounding and I find myself tossing and turning.

Right when I'm finally about to doze off, Vivian is shaking me awake. "Get up, lazybones. We need to hurry."

The arena is dark, the only lighting being small green strips that run along the floor. Vivian slips into the Cornucopia and begins packing a bag. I quickly join her, grabbing whatever I can and shoving it into a backpack. I barely take a second to glance at what I take. Doesn't matter. We have to move quietly, and we have to move fast.

"What's going on?"

Cy! Shit! He's standing right behind me, gripping a knife in his hands. "Arietis? Vivian? What are you doing?"
"Nothing," I say quickly. "Just go back to bed."
"You're running away! Guys, I'm sorry, but I don't think I can let you do that!"

I don't even think about what I'm doing. Before Cy can lunge at me, I tackle him and shove him against the Cornucopia. He struggles to get back into position but I swing my bag around my shoulder and clock him in the head with it. He slams against the Cornucopia again. For a moment, Cy's eyelids flutter and then he slumps over in my arms.

"Arietis!" Vivian half shrieks, half whispers. "What the hell!?"

I press two fingers against Cy's neck as I lower him to the ground. "He's still alive."
"Yeah, who knows for how much longer!?"

"I don't know," I admit. "But I'm not sticking around to find out. Let's run."

I turn. Vivian follows behind me as we head for the stairs. I don't look back.

Hey guess who remembered this story exists.

Hope 2023 is treating you better than it is me. Remember that sponsoring is still open and still at 2 gifts per chapter. Blog update will come shortly so stay tuned for that.

-Vr