A/N I don't own Harry Potter

Dumbledore was furious, how dare she! Molly had stolen from him, and no amount of her cooking could make him forgive her. Dumbledore had a trap planned and it was fool proof.

Vernon's car would make a mouth watering target for scrap theives like the Weasley's.

He had reaquanted with the Dursleys as he needed them, so after capturing Harry he could make Harry live with them. Dumbledore planned on teaching Harry a lesson in respect.

Sure enough Molly was coming up the street pushing Ginny's wheelchair, both practically drooling at the excitement of stealing parts off of Vernon's big expensive car. Both members of the hideous duo were carrying a used tool kit and had arrogant grins on their disgusting faces.

Before long Molly had a blowtorch and was getting down to business, while Ginny was unscrewing some lug nuts. Soon a furius Vernon, who only had a pair of boxers on, ran out of the house with a bat and was screaming in fury and went to fight the thieves.

While Vernon and Molly exhanged blows, a meeting was taking place at Hogwarts.

"Severus, this letter you sent is disturbing and extremely unprofessional" said Dumbledore tearsley.

" I flirt with you when your three countries away because I like how you react, I'm teasing " said Snape sarcastically putting on a fedora and sunglasses.

Snape turned as he was leaving and addressed Dumbledore one last time.

"Look Dumbledore I like you. ALOT! And I want to be more than friends, if you cant accept that, then I have to leave Hogwarts" said Snape in his monotone voice after a dramatic pause.

"Dont let the door hit you on the way out" Dumbledore screamed as Snape left and Cho arrived.

"Its her isnt it" Snape hissed.

When Dumbledore and Cho ignored him and started to get busy, Snape stormed out, but not before promising revenge.

Just then, Hagrid burst in laughing and lunged and Dumbledore, grabbing him and throwing him into the active fireplace.

Cho fled and called for help to stop Hagrid's latest rampage.

" You knew didn't ye" Hagrid roared spraying food particles all over Dumbledore's charred face.

"what"? Dumbledore croaked

"You knew I was innocent and could have gotten me a new wand" he roared as he threw Dumbledore across the room.

Dumbledore, who was in a crumpled heap, raised an alarm, and before long Hagrid was scared away by a vast army of mop warriors.

Dumbledore put some aloe on his face and called Ronald into the office. It had appeared he and Mr. Dean Thomas were getting a little too romantic in the common room.

"Ronald, now I remember this is not your first warning" Dumbledore began, but was interupted.

It was Professor Sprout with an upset Lavender Brown.

"Albus, Ms. Brown tells me that she and Mr. Thomas have been dating for almost three years, and that Ronald gave Mr. Thomas a love potion" said Sprout glaring at Ronald who grinned.

" Ronald is this true" asked Dumbledore in a tired and distant voice.

"You better believe it! I'm better for Dean, we have all the same intrests like quidditch, Lavender doesnt care about quiddich!" Ronald said angerly as he jumped to his feet.

"Professor Sprout go fetch the antidote and give Ms. Brown and Mr. Thomas a week off to recover from this ordeal." said Dumbledore kindly as they took their leave.

"Now Mr. Weasley, you will be happy to know you will be the first student in three hundred years to be punished by the caretakers discreation, I hope you enjoy" said Dumbledore wickedly as Filch emerged from the shadows. Dumbledore grinned as the inferi that was using Filch grabbed Ron by the hair.

meanwhile

Arthur Weasley had broken into the ministry to take out Malfoy, for taunting his family for years. Before he could get to Malfoy's office, he ran into a tall broad shouldred individual who smiled cheerfully down at him, it was Sue Daviz. He ran as fast as he could but it was no use. Nobody heard his scream.

Meanwhile

Aberforth Dumbledore was walking down the hallways that led to the dungeons trying to be quiet. Harry and Draco found him on the Mauruder's Map, and knew he was no doubt spying for his brother.

Aberforth was muttering to himself, "hmm Harry and his friends seem to be in their rooms by curfew, no doubt Albus will find this interesting " as he logged it into his notes.

Just then Draco tapped him on the shoulder. Aberforth turned around with a look of absolute terror on his face.

Later that night at Potter Castle

Dumbledore and his girlfriend Cho Chang were disco dancing when they saw that an owl had arrived. Dumbledore arrogantly opened the package the owl brought and feinted. It was Aberforth folded into a box.

As Dumbledore recovered he saw a second owl coming. As it apprached he saw the unmistakable red hair, it was Arthur's scalp.

That evening at Riddle Castle

Daviz was jamming with her best friend, when she remebered something, Tom had made Horcruxes! She was so excited she hit her friend in the face with a bass guitar. "Sorry" she said quickly helping her friend up.

She had to go to that old shack and get the ring that Tom had told her about. Now if she could just remember where that shack was.

Meanwhile at the Burrow

Molly was holding a weapon of her own design, a frozen turkey wrapped in barbed wire. Charlie was tied up in a cheap used rickity chair, as Molly advanced on him, with both hands clutching the turkey. As Molly raised the barbed turkey over her head and it came down on Charlie's head, he knew no more.

Meanwhile

For Harry and his friends, today was the perfect day for quidditch, and he knew just who to challenge! This quidditch match had so much riding on it.

A/N

So who will Harry challenging at Quidditch?