Chapter 2

I always felt strange. So different to the others. They were so happy, free to let their voices sing while I remained silent, unwilling to do so myself. It never did me any good.

I scarcely remember the time before my room. Brief flashes, indistinct voices saying illegible words. I think I was once just one of the other children. Screaming joyfully, running around outside, playing together with everyone else. I spent so little time like that, but … I remember being …, happy. At least, I think so.

Compared to that brief time, I've so long in my room. It's my home. It's my prison. For the first two years, I hated my room. I wanted nothing more than to leave it, to go play with the other children. I wish it had remained that way. I wish they had kept me locked up in there, never to leave again. It was my prison, but I wish they never let me leave it.

I shot my hand forward, exhaling forcefully as I did so. My muscles tense, my eyes wavering, my teeth clenched as I put all I could into this attack. The aura around me condensed once more, and shot off at the third target, striking it dead on and leaving it a crumbled mess, joining the other 9 beside it.

Yes! I hit it! This is the fifth time I've managed to launch 10 attacks. The third time they've all had enough force, and the first time I've managed to correctly aim every time. I could barely contain the joy I felt, carefully keeping my face blank as I panted in my circle, waiting for instruction. I'm left there for what felt like an eternity with bated breath, before the damned voice spoke.

"You may leave, Subject Zero." His cold, emotionless voice ordered me. What? Yes! I won't get shocked today. That's never happened before.

Keeping my cool as best I could, I turned around and walked past the waiting guards, resisting the urge to taunt the one with his Omni-tool raised. It could only go badly. I walked back to my room at a normal pace, marvelling at how easy it was compared to normal, as the guards followed me.

With a final hiss, the door behind me closed and I could no longer keep the grin off my face. I resisted the urge to scream my joy out to the world. Partially because I didn't want the guards to hear, partially because I was so used to remaining quiet, and partially because I hadn't willingly used that level of volume in a long time.

Humming happily, I made my way over to the desk, taking a seat as I grabbed one of the food bars to celebrate. I didn't want to sit in my usual spot, unwilling to ruin my good cheer.

Munching down with vigour, I worked my way through the bar as I leafed through my favourite book. It was one of the least read ones, only taken out occasionally so I didn't grow tired of it like I had so many others. My first two favourites were among them.

It was a story of a girl, living in a segregated society that reminded me so much of my own. They had so many happy people, but there were also many unhappy ones. The girl was stifled by the system, and she rebelled quietly until one day, she was forced to become part of the society's brutal entertainment. I liked to think the doctors were like that, using me as a form of sick, twisted entertainment. The girl nearly died so many times, but she rebelled against orders whenever she could, and she was eventually rewarded for it! I wished so much to be like her. To be brave like her, but every time I had tried it didn't work out for me. It may be foolish, but I hoped that one-day I could refuse orders like her. Be free like her. One day.

One day.

The guards collected me the next day. That wasn't normal.

Normally tests were every three days, unless I had a surgery, then I was given just enough time to heal before they tested how I changed. There always had to be a difference, and if there didn't seem to be they always thought it was my fault. That I hadn't tried enough. That I could try harder. If I didn't? There was always the old fallback.

Maybe it's because I wasn't injured yesterday? I never remember feeling so good! Nothing ached, I was only a little stiff and I felt good. Energetic.

"Turn left." The guard behind me ordered. What? I was following the route burned into my memory, I didn't even need to think about it now. I had travelled it so many times that it had entered muscle memory.

I've stood here too long, so I quickly complied before they could 'encourage' me, turning left down the identical corridor. It had the same dark floor. The same pale walls. The same stark cleanliness.

Where could we be going? I've never been this way before and there are no signs as to what's behind every door, who's behind each door.

Although I was curious, I continued forward, following the gruff commands until we reach a solid looking door. Where are we? The guard presses a few buttons on his tool, and the door slid open with a soft hiss. Looking in, I find a large open room with objects placed around the outside in a faintly circular pattern. There were a lot of guards standing around the edge of the room, along with a few familiar scientists.

The thing that shocks me, is the other kid standing inside the ring across from me, looking scared. What's going on? It's been so long since one of them looked at me, they always ignored me whenever I was sitting in front of the window. I could stare at the same kid for 10 minutes, my eyes pleading for them to notice me, but all they would do is briefly glance my way, then turn away. Why do they do that?

One of the scientists walked over to me, stopping a few metres away.

"We are running a new test today, Subject Zero." The woman told me, not even looking up from the data-pad she was holding. A new test? What's the other guy doing here. I tilted my head at the woman, confused. Not that she could tell.

"You've been training your biotics against stationary targets for long enough. We feel that you need something more … challenging." More?! I practically pass out at the end of every session. What could be more challenging than that.

The woman continued to read off her device, even as she spoke to me.

"Today you will face subject 82, testing your biotics against his." This is starting to sound bad. Face? Like a fight?

The woman looked up, gazing down at me with a small, cruel grin on her face.

"Only one of you is leaving the ring today." She told me. Only one of us …? What! Is this a fight to the … to the death?! No, no it can't be. They can't make us do this. Surely this is all some joke.

I stare at the woman's face, but she remains steadfast, unchanging. I look around at the guards who's faces I can see. None of them are smiling at the joke.

"No." I croak out, my voice soft, raspy. That makes the woman look back up, having returned her head to her tablet.

"What did you say?" she softly asked, he voice stern. I lose hope at resolving this easily. But I refuse, I won't do it. I don't care what they do, how can they treat me even worse? I refuse to do what they've ordered. Not this this time. Before, refusing orders served no purpose. All it resulted in was pain. This time …, this time it means something. Firming my resolve, I glare back at the scientist.

"I … said … NO!" I growl back at her, my voice hurting from the effort, but I held firm. She seemed taken aback at first, but that look quickly changed to anger.

"You will do as I say Subject Zero!" she barked at me, furious. It doesn't change my mind. I don't reply, having finished speaking. I've said what I had to, now all I can do is bare the consequences.

"Guard!" The scientist looked over my shoulder and commanded one of them. The next thing I felt was pain as the familiar shock passed through me. Still, I only kneeled, glaring at her through the pain.

"Again!" I grit my teeth, stifling my scream.

"Again!" I can't hold it in this time, the pain too much. I collapsed to the ground, convulsing wildly. This time it lasted longer, but eventually subsided.

"Get up Subject Zero. Stand across from Subject 82." She ordered once more.

Groaning, I slowly raised myself off the floor into kneeling position once more. I raise my eyes to her once more and glare. I don't say anything, my message clear.

She didn't even have to order the next shock. It seemed to last longer than normal as well, and I passed out before it finished, my vision fading away into black spots accompanied by the agony roaring through my body.

"arggh-" I screamed, the electricity burning through. It continued for far too long. The pain spread throughout my body, the burn overwhelming. My teeth alternated between clenching and spreading apart as I lost control of my body. I was like that all over, my limbs feeling almost foreign by the time it stopped, and my throat raw. I lay there on the ground panting, trying to regain my breath. Feeling a build-up in my mouth I turned my head to the side and spit, the metallic tang in my mouth growing even stronger as I spit out bits of my throat. I couldn't move, I could barely even twitch a finger let alone stand up.

"You will fight!" the man above me screamed, unafraid of me. He had been shocking me for a few minutes now, but not enough to lose consciousness. This was the fifth time I'd refused to fight, and each time they punished me for it. Because I refused to fight. Because I refused to hurt another child. They tried to tell me he would be fine, that this was just to test our abilities. But I knew better, those targets they had me target week after week? They were made of metal. Launching a blast like that was all I knew how to do, and it would obliterate the boy. I refuse to do that. Why could they not understand?! What was wrong with them. Were they really so vile, so willing to shed our blood?

Closing my eyes, a memory flashed before them. It was hazy, blurry, indistinct. But suddenly I remembered. It was the last time I was left among the other children. One of the guards was ordering me to go towards the room where they hurt me, cut me up, experimented on me. I didn't want to go, so he grabbed my arm and started dragging me there. It hurt, the guard uncaring of how hard his hand gripped my arm. I was scared, so scared, so I reacted. I called upon the potential within me I had only been beginning to tap into and I launched it at the guard. I did it through the arm he held, to make him go away. The blast launched him back until he collided with the wall with a bang. The man lay there, groaning. His head was bleeding, his eyes unfocused. That was all I noticed before I collapsed to the ground myself, unable to stay awake any longer. That one blast took everything out of me, and I barely even noticed the darkening of my vision before I collapsed to the ground, unconscious.

That was the last day I was allowed among the other children. When I was just one of them, I had almost forgotten. It does give me an idea though. Is it a great one? Not really, no. Still sounds good to me, let him feel some of the pain he's given me. See how he likes it.

Forcing my arms beneath me, I grit my teeth, my arms shaking at the effort as I slowly raised myself off the ground. My arms shook with the effort, but I managed to leverage my way onto my knees, and the guard seemed happy to let me try. I kept my head lowered, unwilling to let him see the glint in my eyes and the sharp grin on my mouth as I concentrated, seeing how close to me he was. Too close. Taking a deep breath, I held it in for a moment as I pulled the trigger in my head, focusing on condensing the exotic energy into my hand. I raised my head and screamed at the guard as I launched the blast at him. Satisfied at the shock on his face. I watched intently, unwilling to even blink. The blast impacted against his chest against the solid plate armour every guard wore. With an echoing crack, the armour broke, and my attack exploded at the same time, releasing its payload viscously. I watched as his chest caved inwards, gleeful at the damage. Watched as his eyes bugged out, as he opened his mouth to scream, but nothing came out. He staggered back two steps, before falling, unable to continue standing. I sat there for a few seconds watching him struggle to breath but failing. Hearing him gasp for air. I didn't even fight the wide grin on my face, satisfaction oozing of me. Let's see how you like healing from that! The grin remained even as two of the other guards shot their Omni-tool's payload at me, the electricity flowing through me only making me grit my teeth, but my smile remained. It did so until I lost consciousness, and even then I'm still not sure if I lost it.

I sat there my arms chained - pulled to each side, before more guards, but they didn't have my attention. The scientist behind the transparent wall did. She was just standing there, staring at me.

"For someone who didn't want to fight, you sure seemed to enjoy hurting-" she paused, looking down at a data-pad "- James. Now why is that …?" She trailed off, waiting for a response. I had none to give.

I won't deny it, I didn't regret what I did. Some small part of me is screaming at what I'd done, but it was overshadowed by the knowledge that I hurt the man who had shocked me so many times, inflicted pain upon me more than any other. Doesn't mean I'm going to tell her though. I kept my face neutral, even as I held her gaze.

The scientist stood there, staring at me. The room was painfully silent, some of the armoured guards around me fidgeting. The woman tsked at my silence.

"Aren't going to tell me?" she asked, her face blank. No. What would be the point? It won't change what's about to happen. The guards around me were all holding batons with prongs on the end. More shocks, I presume. "Well, we can't have that. Guards? Do it." The woman ordered. She sat down beside a few of her colleagues, all of them watching me.

The first man slowly walked behind me, his footsteps echoing in the sudden silence. Each step like a countdown for what was to come. He stopped directly behind me, about half a metre back and then waited. Nothing happened, and I just sat there, tense. I glanced quickly around the room, finding none of the guards had moved before returning my gaze to the woman who spoke earlier. The silence lingered, overwhelming. The anticipation starting to get to me. I refused to show it though, keeping my unblinking gaze on her. That changed the instant the guard activated his device.

The familiar sound of electricity reached my ears, even as I felt the prongs strike me. Something was different though. It felt different. My entire body was feeling the effects, but not as much. It was localised on my back, where he was pressing the device. It felt even worse there, the normal burn having greatly increased. It felt like my blood was boiling, my skin melting. All this time I had kept my teeth clenched, and my voice silent. I didn't make a sound, all too familiar with the feeling. My eyes had closed though, I wasn't capable of that much self-control.

"I though one might not be enough." Reached my ears, the woman sounding bored. Next, I heard multiple sets of footsteps walking around me before they surrounded me. I didn't know how many. My eyes were still shut, and before I could open them the first baton touched me. It was the same spot and this time I moaned, unable to stop myself.

Then a second baton made contact, this time on my stomach. I couldn't make a sound, my mouth open in a silent scream but there was no breath in my lungs, and I was unable to draw in more due to my convulsing muscles. I sat there, contorting back and forth between the two sticks, incapable of doing anything, in agony. Then the third one touched my back. Then a fourth on my right leg. It hurt on a level I had never felt, not even close. Electricity was coursing through my entire body, like when the Omni-tool normally struck me. Except it was worse, far worse. Even still, it brought my memories back to the last time this happened, and I instinctually acted. Performing what had last time stopped my pain. I triggered the muscle and let lose a biotic shockwave around me forcing all the guards back, stopping the pain.

I sat there, panting, trying to catch my breath. There was drool coming out of my mouth, but I was unable to control it. My body was unresponsive, and I felt nauseous and dizzy. My vision began fading, but my hearing remained long enough.

"Hmm, there was a noticeably greater response shown. Subject zero has never released an attack of that magnitude. This bodes further testing."

I lay on my bed, my body aching. Seeing the results of their impromptu testing, they had decided in 'merited further investigation.' In essence, that meant shocking me more. More than they ever had before. By the end of today's session, I began to grow numb. They had increased the time under duress each test, and we were currently in the third week of testing. I was only given a day to recuperate each time, and the damage had built up over time.

My skin was littered with small black marks, evidence of the baton's prongs. I would normally care more, but first I had to deal with walking. My muscles currently didn't respond quite right. Even before the near daily 'tests', I struggled to walk. My legs refused to respond how I told them to, incapable of smooth movements giving me a stilted, jerky stride. I experienced similar things with my arms and the rest of my body. I'm not quite sure why this was the case if it was due to unhealed muscles or acting up nerves. I did know that my muscles all ached like they never had before, like I had worked each muscle for 8 hours without rest, day after day. That was the other reason I struggled to walk, my legs could barely support my weight.

At least today was the last day of this, they hadn't noticed any differences for the last few days when I inevitably released my biotics. I'm not sure why I did it, maybe it was an instinctual response to the pain. I Knew it's what they wanted, but I still did it anyway. I don't know why.

I laid there on my bed, laying in the position that hurt least. It wasn't that bad, most of the pain came when I tried to move, everything else was just due to sore skin that had blistered and was healing. Dealing with those was a breeze compared to everything else. Still, I couldn't just remain here, staring at the blank ceiling. I needed something to distract my thoughts, pull them away from the memories.

Taking a breath and gritting my teeth, I reached my hand up and grabbed the bar beside my bed, using its assistance to pull myself up. Once I was in a sitting position, I shuffled myself forward until my legs dangled over the bed and I slid off, groaning all the while.

My feet made contact with a sharp jerk, my legs wobbling for a second before I found my balance. Taking another deep breath, I made my way over to the window. I was incapable of reading right now. My hands not steady enough for more than a few minutes. Sitting down with a sharp exhale, I leaned back into the chair as I gazed out at the playing children.

We're they always playing? I swear they were always outside of the window whenever I looked. Where did they find the energy? Even on my good days I sometimes struggled to get out of bed. They looked so … carefree. Jumping, running, squealing happily. Like they had never suffered before. They probably hadn't, wouldn't unless I fought them. But I refuse to, I had to go through with this regardless. At the very least, I could let them be happy, free to play, to laugh. To smile. At least some of us could.

"Is it worth it?" I whispered, currently incapable of anything louder, even this hurt my throat. Closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, I opened them again to continue watching. They were a good distraction from the thoughts running through my head. They would return soon enough when I slept.

"I hope so."

"As far as we can tell, simple pain will only garner so much of a response. As such, we believe another method is needed for your testing." An older man spoke to me from behind one of his windows. We were in the so called 'Coliseum' again. All the guards around the edges, and another kid standing across from my position, glaring at me.

Why am I back here again? I already proved I was unwilling to fight. What would doing so again get them?

"You will find subject 94 a far more … willing participant then Subject 82 was. You're cooperation is no longer required." The man spoke one more time before falling silent. This was all the warning I got before the kid across from me started running at me, hate distorting his features.

What have I done to him? Why is he so willing to fight, the other one wasn't. What did I ever do to this kid? I am always locked up in my room while he is let free in the courtyard. How could I have possibly wronged him.

My thoughts cost me, as the kid reached me while I was processing. He reeled his fist back before launching it at my stomach, making solid contact and knocking the breath out of me. I hunched over in pain, holding my stomach before looking back up at the boy, hurt. All this did was allow him to grasp his hand in my hair and pull. It hurt! It felt like he was ripping my hair out of my skull. My eyes began to water even as I followed the pull, trying to stop the feeling. This lead to me falling forwards onto my front. The kid took that advantage as well, jumping on top of me as he started to wail on me, screaming at me.

Feeling every time his fists made contact vividly, I curled up my body to promote as small a target as I could. I wrapped my head with my arms, trying to protect it, but this left the rest of my body unguarded. The boy continued until he ran out of steam and sat atop me, panting. I did nothing, remaining there with my arms wrapped around my head and my back screaming at me, awaiting more. It never came.

"That's enough. Restrain subject 94 guards." The same man spoke. Sure enough, I felt the boy's weight leave me. I remained prone, unwilling to move lest he brought back.

"Why didn't you fight back Subject Zero?" I didn't reply. I had no answer for him. He didn't seem to expect any, and soon enough I was brought back to my room, hurting and in pain. The left me on my bed, which was kinder than I expected of them, but I was grateful. I don't think I could have made it there myself. Wincing, I reach out and grab my pillow, pulling it towards me.

"What did I do to you?" I whisper, clutching my pillow to my chest.

"Today you face Subject 78."

He was another boy, bigger than the other one. Older. This one had the same hateful expression on his face as the other one, and I readied myself for a similar experience. My back had been littered with bruises the size of subjects 94's fists. He wasn't gentle, and my back was left a mottled blue, yellow and grey colour for three weeks. I only finished healing a few days ago. The experiment half-way through didn't help things either.

This boy reacted in the same way to the unspoken command, even used the same opener. I tried to dodge but failed, and once more had the wind knocked out of me. He was stronger than the other boy though, and I collapsed down to the ground wheezing and choking. Unlike the other boy though, this one stopped there, a confused look on his face. He looked back towards the Scientist for guidance but as soon as he did we were both struck with the Omni-tools lightning blast.

We both laid there after it finished, I recovered quicker than him, used to the experience.

"You face Subject 102 today, Subject Zero." A lady spoke after I was lead back into the room. This time there was a girl standing across from me. She was about my age, a little younger maybe. She looked timid, scared to be here. Even when the signal to begin was given, she did nothing. Neither of us wanted to fight.

Needless to say, she wasn't spared the treatment for faltering. The lack of a fight seemingly made the shocking last even longer.

This was the last time any of them hesitated, the last time I saw anything other than hate or anger on my opponent's faces.

…

"You face subject 86, Subject Zero."

…

"This is Subject 47"

…

"Subject 64."

…

"Subject 89."

Once more, I laid on the ground after another of my regular beat-downs. I had never fought back, not even once. And each time, I suffered for it. Something odd happened though, the looks of hate and anger had largely disappeared. The attacks never did though.

"You don't seem to be learning your lesson, Subject Zero." A younger scientist informed me through the intercom. She sounded almost amused when she spoke.

"You have to fight back one day."

No, I refuse, I can handle the attacks. I've taken so many, I had grown used to it. I knew how to minimise the damage, what parts hurt more when hit, what parts I should protect more. It didn't help much, but every little bit counted.

"Let's see, stating from today, every fight you lose will result in a punishment. What shall todays be? Oh, I know!" The disturbingly perky scientist spoke as if she was talking about the weather.

Nothing happened that day, and I let myself believe it would be fine, that her words didn't mean anything.

It was night-time a week later and my room was freezing, I had no extra clothes to cover myself. All I could do was remain on the bed curled up as tight as I could, keeping my shoes on. My teeth chattered the entire night, and I shivered constantly. It seemed like every time I fell asleep, I woke up instantly. I spent the entire night like that, the hours passing excruciatingly slow until morning came and finally warmed up. I uncurled myself, my body aching from keeping the position for hours. I finally felt comfortable enough to properly sleep, but the moment I closed my eyes I was interrupted by an alarm sent from the guards.

Walking towards the coliseum, my head felt fuzzy, deep bags under my eyes. My vision was blurring in front of me. Each step was a struggle, each foot in front of the other a triumph, and before I knew it I was inside the room standing across from a vaguely familiar figure glaring at me.

"Subject Zero. Today you face subject 84."

Needless to say, I lost. Badly.

That was but one of a few punishments they gave me. The fight's happened every week now, instead of every three. I was never given enough time to recover, my body was one giant bruise at this point. Breathing was sometimes difficult, the motion painful. I had still yet to fight back but my resolve was cracking. Each day spent like this another nail in the coffin that was my ideals.

I've spent sleepless nights shivering in the cold. Others in a sweltering hotbox with too little water to help recover the next day. I'm not sure which of the two I preferred. These nights were rare, the most extreme. Other nights there would be a flashing light outside of my door, providing a distraction. That was one of the nights I could hope to get some sleep, provided I kept my eyes covered and contorted into a position that let the least light into my eyes. I woke up stiff and aching all over after these nights, but at least somewhat rested.

The current final method was withholding my food. These days were my favourite as I could ignore the hunger easily enough. Compared to being a living bruise, what's one more ache?

I held my resolve, bearing all this suffering with, while not a grin per say, but some pride that I stuck to what I believed in. I wish I could take more pride than I do, I was faltering more and more each day. It had been three months of this, and I couldn't take it anymore. I was now unused to it not hurting whenever something touched a part of me, the bags covered my entire eyes, and not just beneath them. I had visibly lost weight, by bones starting to protrude. Maybe there's a way? What if I just dodge, surely that's enough.

"You face subject 85, Subject zero." The woman spoke. I stood across from one of the most stoic kids I've met. I watched with lidded eyes as he approached me, confidence in his form as he left himself open, believing I would just take it. Not today.

At the last moment, I moved to the side as fast as I could and watched as his fist flew past me, leaving him unbalanced. He almost fell over, stumbling forward a few steps windmilling his arms before he eventually found his balance. He quickly turned back towards me, a pensive look in his face.

He was confused, but he didn't question me as he ran back towards me, launching his fist more cautiously. I waited to the last moment and dodged that one as well. In my time of adjusting where my opponents would hit, I had grown used to how the untrained kids moved.

I dodged the next few after that and continued to do so until I grew tired. I was unable to dodge then, and I lost once more. Nothing was said to me before they took me away, and I dreaded the coming punishment.

I dreaded it, yet it never came. I lay there that night, wincing with every movements, dreading the night to come, but nothing ever happened. I could lie and say the anticipation kept me up, but I was far too tired for that. Instead, I lay there for maybe 20 minutes before my exhaustion grew too much and I succumbed to my slumber.

Blinking my eyes open slowly, I looked around, confused. Is it … daytime? The light was shining brightly, the sounds of screaming children off in the distance. I blinked languidly a few more times, letting it process before I realised what was different. I felt halfway rested! They let me sleep the night. It's not enough, but I don't care over how much better than normal I felt. Sure, I was still heavily bruised and malnourished, but I could process that.

I've been in a mental fugue for so long, the sleep deprivation rendering me a simpleton incapable of introspection. The ability to think for once was, mind-blowing. Did dodging satisfy them? Was that really all I had to do? I didn't hurt anyone, yet I wasn't punished. If I'd known that was enough I would have done that weeks ago.

It had been a week, yet nothing happened.

I had been given food every day. The room was always the normal temperature. There were no blinking lights outside of my room. I wasn't punished at all for losing.

Walking towards the coliseum again, I felt far better than I could remember. The full week of sleeping and eating had done me a world of good. I was properly rested now, having fully recovered in that regard. I was still bruised and scrawny, but not as much as I had become. My frame had filled out a bit and the bruising was almost entirely cosmetic now.

Opening the door, I stood across from my opponent with resolve. I feel far more energetic this time, capable of far more movement.

"You fight subject 112 Today." The scientist announced and the fight was on. The girl ran towards me immediately. I remained standing in the same location, watching.

The girl was rather tall, likely older than me, but she was also rather slender. She didn't look very muscular, which was encouraging because maybe this time I had a chance of wearing her out before I wore myself out.

As she closed in on me, she raised her right hand, the muscles in the arm tensing. She was going to lead with that hand. Judging by her flared out elbow, she would be punching towards my right side, so I should dodge left.

Waiting for the last moment, I sidestepped her hand, pushing it out of the way with my left hand as I made my right shoulder fall back. Turning around to keep my eyes on her, I jogged back a few metres. This gave her the time to recover and turn back to face me, a sneer on her face.

"Why'd you dodge you coward!" 112 shouted, before running back to me. I remained silent, conserving my breath. Every little bit counted. This time, the girl tried to punch me with her other hand, directly at my centre. I couldn't dodge this one as easily, but I had the room, so I waited till she planted her leading foot and focused her eyes on my chest, aiming there. I jumped back as far as I could, and the girl missed with some room to spare. Unfortunately, she held back this time and didn't lose her balance, she just stepped forward again.

This continued for a few minutes, all the while the girl grew angrier. By this time, she was shouting obscenities at me, but I ignored them, deeming them unimportant. Ignoring her words only seemed to make her angrier as her face turned red. The final dodge of mine seemed to have been the last straw as she stopped trying to punch me. This time, she just ran at me. She never raised a fist, instead leaning forward.

So, she's trying to tackle, is she? I can't dodge that in the same way. Something I had noticed though, was how her breathing had become heavy. I was breathing heavier than normal, but not to the same extent.

Seeing as I couldn't dodge, I started running. Turning my back on her, I ran to the other side of the room, pumping my arms and legs. I looked behind me to see how close she was, she was still running after me, only a metre or so behind me.

"Stay still!" 112 shouted. Yeah, no.

We continued this song and dance for a minute. I made sure to breathe through my nose, even when I started to lose my breath and it seemed like it wasn't enough oxygen, I persisted. I don't know why, but I just seem to remember it was better for endurance.

My chest heaved up and down, my lungs burning. My legs ached and I was slowing down. So was the girl, but she was still right behind me. We were approaching one of the barriers again, and I moved to change directions. As I did, my right foot slipped, and I lost my balance.

Tripping over my feet, I crashed onto the ground, right next to the barrier. My knees hit first, the impact stinging even as I caught myself on my hands. I tried to get up, but Subject 112 crashed into me before I could.

The girl slammed into my back, forcing me completely back onto the ground. I curled up into my habitual ball while she started punching me, but it wasn't as bad as normal, her blows lacking strength.

She was exhausted! Sure, the punches still hurt, but only a little. Compared to some of the other boys I had faced, this was nothing. She only managed to launch a dozen before she ran out of steam. She was still sitting on me, her weight on my legs, and I could hear her gasping breaths. What happened now?

We both remained there for a few minutes, the girl panting as I was, before the scientist spoke to us.

"That's enough for today."

Yes! It worked. After the girl got off me, I quickly stood up and turned towards my door. This was the first time I had left under my own power in months. I could feel a laugh bubbling up in my chest, and my lips twitching but I controlled myself as best I could. I couldn't let them know how happy I was, or they would find a way to ruin it as well.

For the first time in a while, I had been able to fall into my old routine. I was able to read my books. I was able to sit at my window, watch the other kids play. It didn't hurt as much as it normally did, the lingering aches a sharp reminder of what they had done. But today, my good cheer was undeniable.

I had just had my third fight where I dodged my opponent. It was a more athletic boy today and while I couldn't tire him out quite as much as subject 112 it was still far better than before I used this tactic.

I smiled as I lay on my bed that night. While I wasn't … happy with how my life currently was, I could be satisfied that I hadn't had to kill anyone. I had kept that. Closing my eyes one last time, I started to drift off when I saw a flash of light enter my eyelids. It disappeared quickly. Then it came back.

No … No! Why am I being punished again?! I dodged as much as I could. I ran as hard as I could. I couldn't keep up with the children who were allowed to run around the yard every day, but I tried my best! So why, why am I being punished again?

It had been a week of punishment. Every day, there was something new to torment me. They had even added a new one, having large sounds randomly blare in my room that left me startled and wide awake. I was exhausted.

Once more, my eyes had severe, dark bags underneath them. I hadn't lost much weight, as it hadn't been long enough for that, but I felt weaker. I had missed eating twice now, having not eaten today or yesterday.

The fight was a blur to me, I struggled to concentrate, I couldn't seem to focus on my opponent enough to dodge his punches, so I ran. I ran as hard as I could. Until my lungs were on fire, until my throat burned from the exertion. Until my legs refused to keep holding my weight. I hope my effort was enough.

It wasn't.

I went through another experiment after the next fight. I was barely able to resist my opponent, too weak to do anything. He beat me to a pulp, laughing all the while. Like it was a game to him! My pain amused him like it was the best joke he'd ever heard.

The next day, I lay on my bed covered in bruises, unwilling to even stand in my misery. Tears welled in my eyes at the thought of my fight yesterday. I wanted to scream, to shout my feelings at the world. My fists clenched and I grit my teeth, but I shouldn't make a sound. It never ends well for me. I know this, know it well, yet I can't help the growl that leaves my mouth. It made me feel … better. At least a little bit. That I could unload what I was feeling to the world, at least a little bit.

I laid there thinking, my mind turning for five minutes before I began to feel sleepy. That's odd, it's rather early in the afternoon for me to be tired. Whatever, if I can manage to fall asleep even a little bit, I'll take it.

I woke up under the knife of one of the doctors, the sudden burn along my legs making me scream. Or at least, attempt to. But I was in the same paralysed state as normal.

I limped towards the coliseum as quickly as I could, my legs protesting viscously. I had only had three days to recover from the experiment, the fiery lined running up the back of my legs an indication it wasn't enough. I grit my teeth as I walked, not wanting to give them the satisfaction of hearing me groan. The door opened again, and across from me was the same bastard from last week, the one who laughed. He was standing there, a grin on his face and moving from side to side, watching me intently.

Why am I facing him again? He was particularly enthusiastic last time we fought and that was after I ran him around the ring. I can't do that today. My eyes felt heavy and my legs weak. I nibbled on y lip, what am I going to do?

"Begin."

I watched the boy intently even as he walked towards me, I tried to start running but the jolt of pain running up my legs disabused me of that plan. Gritting my teeth, I turned back towards the boy and raised my fists. Taking a deep breath, I spread my legs shoulder width apart and stood there waiting.

He pulled his fist back as soon as he was within striking distance, I raised my arm to block it, but he powered through it.

"hrngh." My arm hit my chest and I was forced back, trying to absorb the blow.

"hahaha…" the boy laughed at my pain, then closed the distance once more. I raised my hands again, but this time he knocked me to the ground.

I hit butt first, but my legs jerked, and I moaned when they hit the ground. The boy just stood there laughing. Why are you laughing?! What did I do to deserve this. I never hurt you, never spoke to you, yet here you are, laughing.

Turning back to him, I stood up with some difficulty, but he just punched my unguarded head. Stars flashed before my eyes as my hearing turned fuzzy, the side of my head throbbing.

"unghh"

"Hahaha…"

"oof"

"Hahaha…"

I ached all over, the boy continued to punch me with a smile on my face, but he always let me recover. He was dragging this out, laughing all the while. What kind of twisted … bastard did that?! I spit to the side, the metallic tang in my mouth now splattering the floor as I glared at him, my lip stinging. Raising my fists again, I wobbled from side to side.

Once more he raised his fist and once more it hit the side of my face. I didn't get up from this one.

"Begin."

Why is it always him?

...

"Begin."

Why is he always laughing?!

...

"Begin."

ENOUGH! I've had enough!

I've retuned to the same state I once entered, looking underfed, skin mottled black and blue, permanently black eyes.

I had a constant headache. My body always hurt. I was always hungry. And. He. Always. LAUGHED!

Watching the boy confidently swagger over to me, I glared at him. I tuned everything else out, focusing on him even as my vision turned red, and my face felt warm. Raising my hands, I stepped forward and waited for his first blow. I dodged it easily, and he staggered forwards, leaving himself open.

Stepping forward, I clenched my fist with my thumb over my finger and swung my hand forward, aimed directly at his ribs. I tensed my core, leaned firmly on my front leg, and made contact with my knuckles.

"arghh!" he screamed in pain and shock. My knuckles throbbed and my arm trembled slightly, but I grinned at him, a glint in my eyes. He backed away from me, suddenly frighted. Can't have that. You were always laughing when you did this.

Screaming at him, I charged at him with my fists raised even as he backed away. I hit him in his face first, then his gut, then his face again. This brought him to the ground, and I continued to lay into him, shouting at him all the while. I eventually ran out of breath and only then did I stop, panting while sitting on top of the whimpering boy covered in bruises. My knuckles were red, raw, and bleeding, but I didn't care over the joy I felt, a smile on my face.

"Where's your laugh now?" I grinned, a sensation bubbling up in my chest.

I got off him and walked all the way back to my room, no one stopped me. I stopped once I was in there, looking down at my hands, realising what I'd done. My smile disappeared and my hands started shaking.

I washed the blood off my hands in my tiny sink, my knuckles stinging, but it wasn't enough.

"What have I done?" I whispered, suddenly horrified at the glee I had shown while beating up the boy. I collapsed onto my bed, unable to bear going to my window to watch the other kids. Not after what I'd just done to one of them.

I slept fitfully that night, but nothing disturbed my slumber except for myself. The next morning, I choked down one of my ration bars, each swallow a struggle. The knowledge of what'd I'd done sitting heavily upon me.

The knowledge of that I'd continue to do sit sitting even heavier.