Chapter 22
First Rick, then Karen, now Pope. It was like the Second Mass was some kind of beacon for unwelcome former members. She didn't mind Athony's return so much, despite his behaviour shortly before his exile with Pope. She still didn't understand why he had fallen in with the Beserker crowd or why he had chosen to leave with Pope - but it was nice to know he was safe at least.
According to Anthony, the two had been searching for a new vehicle when a Mech blast threw them off the road. Pope was in a bad way, but Anthony managed to get him to safety, until Lyle and Tector found them. She felt evil for thinking it, but part of Grace wished Anthony had left Pope behind. She couldn't forget the image of Jimmy's compass draped around his neck while he beat her father to a pulp. Whenever she thought about it, she couldn't help but dig her fingernails into her palm until the pain distracted her.
But she knew at least one person who would be interested in Pope's return and Grace wanted to break it to her in person. She asked a fellow fighter, Jon, to take shift guarding Karen and she headed straight for Casey's room.
When she knocked on Casey's door, she was already awake, sitting on the edge of her mattress feeding Etta a bottle. As Grace opened the door, Casey glanced up from Etta's basket, her blue eyes shining with surprise. "Grace? Is everything okay?"
"Yeah, um, sorry, I know it's late…is this a good time?"
"Sure, come in. Etta was just a bit hungry, that's all."
Grace closed the door behind her and walked over to the basket where the small girl was happily sucking away at her bottle of milk. "She gets bigger every time I see her," she smiled widely at the baby whose big eyes glanced at her before focusing back on her delicious meal.
"Bigger and stronger," Casey smiled. "She's stronger than I could have imagined."
"Must be your influence rubbing off on her."
Casey chuckled and shook her head modestly. "So what's wrong? Did something happen with Karen?"
Grace drew in a deep, troubled breath. "No," she sighed. She thought the best way to say it was to just come out with it. "Anthony and Pope are back. They ran into some trouble and Pope…he's in a bad way."
Casey's eyes widened as Grace spoke, then her look of shock eventually softened into concern.
"I just thought you might want to know," Grace continued gently. "I'm sure the Beserkers would have told you but…I wanted you to hear it from me."
Casey was quiet for a long beat, her focus settling back on to Etta, until she eventually replied in a soft voice. "Thank you for telling me. Will he be okay?"
"I don't know. Anne was checking him over when I left, but he was unconscious." She paused. "I know-I know you cared about him. You can go see him if you want. I'll watch Etta."
"Oh, I don't know…Are you sure?"
Grace smiled at her. "Yes, of course. Some of your Beserker buddies are already with him." She sensed the hesitancy in Casey's expression. "Seriously. Go."
Casey handed her the bottle and grabbed her jacket. "Thanks, Grace." She gave Etta a little wave before heading for the door. "I won't be long."
"Take as long as you need," Grace said, stifling a yawn as she took Casey's spot on the bed and lowered the bottle back in Etta's mouth.
As soon as the door shut, Etta started fussing, perplexed by Casey's absence. She refused to eat anymore and it wasn't long until her little face screwed up and she released a loud cry.
"Alright, it's alright."
Grace rifled through Casey's 'Etta bag' and pulled out a little towel which she slung over her shoulder, thinking the baby might need a good old fashioned burping after her feed. It seemed to help a bit as she held Etta up to her shoulder, rocking her gently and patting her back.
The last time she did this, she was a kid holding baby Matt. He was a few months old at the time and Tom let her hold him, not realising the boy had a full stomach. Matt spit up all down Grace's shirt and she nearly dropped him out of surprise and disgust. She certainly learnt her lesson after that and there were many lessons to come. She was still learning, she thought as she wiped Etta's mouth and wrapped her up warm. Even as adolescents, she was still learning about her brothers - and boys were hard enough to understand without all this alien apocalypse stuff on top.
She often wondered what it would have been like to have a baby sister instead. A little girl like Etta. What would she have looked like? What would her interests have been? Maybe she would have been a Mini Grace, maybe they would have even been best friends. But she would never know now, and she didn't mind really. She wouldn't trade any of her brothers in, no matter how angsty and annoying they could get, or what drama they put the family through. They were her brothers and always would be. Her family.
Looking at Etta now, her sweet chubby face as her eyes began to close, she found herself wondering what it would be like to have her own baby. Before the invasion, she always thought of herself having a family of her own. A husband. Kids. House with a white picket fence, the whole deal. But that wasn't to be. Now she saw what having kids in this new world was like. She thought no one in their right mind would intentionally bring a baby into such a dangerous world, but then she saw women like Casey, raising Etta under the most horrific circumstances, and doing a damn good job. It made her wonder if the image she had about having her own family could still be a reality.
As Etta drifted back to sleep in her basket, Grace found herself drifting too. Kicking off her boots, she curled up on the mattress, facing Etta's basket. She was only going to rest her eyes - just for a moment.
"Grace. Grace?"
The gentle voice stirred her awake and as she slowly opened her eyes, she saw Casey leaning over her.
"Casey?" Grace blinked hard a few times before looking around her. "Oh…I fell asleep. Sorry."
As she attempted to sit up, she realised her hand was still draped over the basket and Etta was playing with her fingers.
"It's okay. It looked like you needed the rest," Casey smiled as Grace shielded her tired eyes from the sun streaming through the window.
"It's morning?"
"Yeah. Sorry - I didn't want to wake you so I let you sleep for a bit."
Grace immediately stooped down to put on her boots. "I've got to check on Ben and Karen."
"Okay." Casey bent over Etta's basket and rubbed her little belly. The infant giggled happily at her. "Well, thanks for being with Etta last night."
As Grace tightened her laces, she suddenly realised why she had been there in the first place. "Right. How's Pope?"
"He's stable," Casey replied after a worried sigh. "But he still hasn't woken up."
Grace finished her laces and slowly straightened up, watching Casey as she sat back on the bed and started twisting a strand of her hair nervously around her fingers. "You really care about him, don't you?"
Casey shrugged. "I care about what happens to him. Even after everything. I don't know why."
Grace nodded gently. It was clear Casey felt something for Pope, even if she didn't understand it. Regardless, Grace knew all too well what it was like to worry about someone she cared about.
"I appreciate you telling me," said Casey. "You didn't have to do that."
Grace smiled at her. "Yes I did." She jumped to her feet and tickled Etta's tummy. "Be good, Etta!" Heading for the door, she offered Casey a brief wave. "See you girls later."
She'd left Karen and Ben alone for much longer than intended. Sure they had a guard, but it wasn't the same as his big sister looking out for him. Before she did anything else, she had to check on them.
As she headed for the psych ward, she heard Hal calling her from behind. She spun around, surprised to see him.
"Hal. Where are you going?"
"I'm checking on Karen," Hal stated, marching past her.
"Thought we decided it was best you stay away for now?" she challenged, following him.
"No. You and Ben decided. I found her, I have a right to know how she's doing."
"Have you spoken to him? Ben?"
"No, but someone said he'd picked up breakfast for Karen." He looked back at her. "Surprised you left his side to be honest."
"I got distracted," Grace muttered as they neared Karen's cell. Hal opened the door to Karen's room where they both froze in their tracks.
It was a split second, but Ben and Karen appeared to be kissing, both of their sets of spikes glowing bright blue, their faces and bodies touching. As soon as the door opened, they parted, a look of surprise on both of their faces.
"What the hell?" Hal yelled, confused and outraged.
As soon as Ben stepped away from her, Karen gasped and collapsed onto the floor. Immediately, Hal swooped to her aid and knelt beside her.
"What did you do to her?" Hal demanded, glaring at Ben before gently shaking Karen. "Karen? Karen!"
The girl groaned, coming to as Hal cradled her in his arms.
"Ben, what happened?" Grace asked her brother, grabbing his arm. "What did she do?"
"She didn't do anything, look at her!" snapped Hal. "He did something! He must have!"
"Hal," Grace sighed. He was so quick to blame Ben. His own brother. There must be some explanation and she was willing to hear it. She would bet anything Karen wasn't innocent in all this. Unfortunately, while her back was turned, Ben had backed out of the room and made his escape.
"Ben? Ben!" Grace yelled after him. She peered out to the corridor, but he was already gone.
Karen groaned again, groggily sitting up.
"Are you okay?" Hal asked her, helping her on to the bed.
"Yeah. Yeah, I think so." She held her head as if the room was spinning and Hal was the only thing keeping her steady.
"What happened?" demanded Grace, crossing her arms over her chest and glaring at Karen.
"I don't know. We were just talking and then I-I felt this connection from him."
"Connection?" Grace arched her eyebrow as Karen began to cry.
"I was so scared, Hal." she sniffed.
"Hey, hey, hey. It's okay. It's okay."
Grace rolled her eyes as Karen buried herself into Hal's arms, sobbing into his tight embrace. It was a pathetic display; not like the Karen she used to know. She wasn't buying the damsel in distress act. Even if what she was saying was true, Ben wouldn't have harmed her intentionally. This was an overreaction at the very least.
"Hal, a word please?"
"Right now?" Hal asked through gritted teeth, Karen still sniffling into his chest.
Grace raised her eyebrows at him impatiently and he sighed in defeat. He touched Karen's damp cheek, telling her he'll be right back. Karen still looked shaken and distraught - a state she had mastered. She nodded and wrapped herself up in her blanket whilst Hal followed Grace into the corridor and out the fire exit doors.
The fresh air was a welcome relief as Grace took in a deep breath, feeling fit to burst. "What is your problem, Hal?"
"My problem? Are you kidding?" Hal scoffed, throwing his hands in the air.
"Ben's our brother. Doesn't that mean anything to you?"
"He was our brother, Grace. Then he got taken and he came back and he's-he's different. He's not the Ben we knew."
"I know that, but he's still family."
"Is he? Or does he have a new family?" challenged Hal, his face flushing red. "This so-called skitter resistance we've heard nothing about for two weeks. He risked his own life to save Jimmy's killer. Or have you forgotten?"
Her jaw clenched. "Of course I haven't!"
"Hell, if Red Eye came back tomorrow, do you think Ben would stick around?" questioned Hal, putting a hand on his hip. "You saw what he was like with him."
"You don't mean that!" cried Grace, her eyes filling with tears. She watched as Hal turned away from her, frustrated. She knew Hal was scared, maybe even confused, and it was hard to accept the things that were happening to Ben - she had struggled with it herself - but he was still their brother. He was still on their side, she was sure of that.
She breathed shakily as Hal turned back to face her, an exasperated look on his face. "I'm putting my trust in Ben," she declared.
He raised his brows. "After everything he's done?"
"Yes."
Hal shook his head, astounded by her response. Then his gaze wandered for a second, realising something. "What if he's doing something to Karen?"
"What?"
"It's that stuff he was doing with the skitters. His spikes glowing," babbled Hal, beginning to pace back and forth on the concrete. "What if he…what if he was trying to recruit her?"
"Hal, you sound crazy."
"Red-Eye recruited Ben, didn't he? And Rick? He wants de-harnessed kids. Karen's a perfect candidate; she's got information they need."
"Ben wouldn't do that."
"Stop defending him!" snapped Hal, practically shaking her. "You always have, because when you look at him you see your dorky baby brother. But he's not anymore, Grace. He's grown up, and he's dangerous. We don't know what he's capable of."
Grace breathed deeply, staring into Hal's wide and anxious eyes. Whether Hal was right or not, she knew one thing: "We need to find him."
"Agreed."
She tried to collect herself, thinking where Ben could have gone. She started backing up towards the building. "You go high, I'll go low. He can't have gone far."
Hal nodded as he headed up the metal staircase.
"And Hal - go easy on him. Just make sure he's safe."
Wordlessly, Hal agreed, already halfway up the stairs as Grace opened the fire exit door. She immediately felt the impact of another person bumping into her. Maggie.
"Grace. I need to talk to you," she said urgently.