The five of them were taken in under the hospitality of a kind married couple whose home was decorated with the wisteria family crest on their door. They were given food and lodging for free, grateful to have Demon Slayers under their roof for having saved their family many years ago, placing them all in one room. Uzui sat at the very front, leaning his tall frame against a small desk, watching Inosuke devour their bowl of rice balls, Kagami and Tanjiro partake in the sweet, warm tea offered to them, and Zenitsu sit with a loathsome look on his face staring at the Hashira.
"Listen up, you four. Once you're in the Entertainment District, you should try to seek out my wives. I'll search for any info on the demons," Uzui quickly informed them.
None of them said a word. The only sound made was the rice balls gargling down Inosuke's throat. That was until Zenitsu's jealousy got the best of him.
"This is completely ridiculous!" Zenitsu suddenly screamed angrily.
Uzui regarded him with a confused, "Huh?"
Red face, a muscle spasming in his fore-head, he turned his blazing brown-golden yellow irises on the annoyed Hashira. "You're joking, right?!" He continued to scream smacking his hand multiple times against the floor harshly, "How dare you order us to waste our time finding a bride for you, huh?!"
Uzui looked at him with the same anger and annoyance he received, growling, "What?! When did I ever ask for something like that?!"
"Shut up! I'm not done talking here!" Zenitsu immediately interrupted him holding up an accusing finger. He was so angry not even Tanjiro could calm the yellow-hair boy down. "Just because a freak like you has no luck with the ladies doesn't make it okay to use Demon Slayers like us for such a pitiful reason! We're not helping you find a wife, you creep!"
"What are you babbling about, idiot?! I'm talking about my wives who've infiltrated the Entertainment District and are hard at work gathering intel! I've stopped receiving regular check-ins, so I need to ensure they're still safe!" Uzui immediately countered with clear irritation.
Zenitsu had stopped screaming but it was clear he didn't believe Uzui. "I suppose that's what a guy like you would fantasize," He spoke in low, monotone voice looking at the Hashira like he was a pathetic loser.
"You damned punk!" Uzui only screamed before throwing out his fist.
They gasped, waiting for his fist to make contact with Zenitsu's face, but watched dozens upon dozens of brown envelopes fly out instead. He shrieked feeling the paper slap him across the face and collapsed to the ground in a pile of the brown envelopes surrounding him.
Holding four in his grip, Uzui scoffed, "Here's your proof, letters that were sent to me by Kasugai Crow."
Inosuke paid no attention to the task at hand, only the rice ball in both of his. Kagami grabbed a bundle consisting of five wrapped together by a piece of string. What she saw were not individuals flying but large bundles holding together many letters. "There's quite a lot of envelopes. She must've been undercover for a long time," She stated to Uzui picking up two more curiously.
With a smirk and a shrug, Uzui added, "Oh, well, I do have three wives."
Instantly, before Kagami could blink, Zenitsu sat up with the most haunted look she's ever seen. Eyes so wide they could pop out of his skull, mouth turned downwards in disbelief, and face shrunken in like a skeleton! "Huh? Did you say, "Wives"? And, "Three"? Three?! Three?! THREE WIVES?! THERE'S NO WAY! How did YOU, of all people, manage to get THREE WIVES?! Is this some kind of SICK JOKE-?!" He started to rave like a complete lunatic!
In the midst of his fit, Uzui wordlessly jetted out his fist. He rammed it so hard into Zenitsu's stomach spit spewed from his mouth and he immediately collapsed to the ground unconscious, groans and gasps escaping his body haggardly.
Kagami and Tanjiro flinched slightly at the display and let out sighs of disappointment, the letters of Uzui's wives crumpling slightly in their grip. Inosuke only casually replaced his boar-mask on his head when he finished all of their dinner. Though, even underneath it, she could tell Inosuke was just as exhausted and freaked like they were.
"You got a problem with that, kid?" Uzui quietly scowled at the unconscious boy.
Kagami and Tanjiro lined the bundles up by wife. Their names weren't ever stated in the letters, obviously to cover and hide their identities, but all three had different and unique handwriting, as well as writing style. The first wife was delicate, pretty, and calm. She spoke of how peaceful yet disturbing the Entertainment District had been since her arrival. The second wife was fierce and powerful, and she spoke of the same as the first wife. She felt an unnatural aura surrounding the district and was trying to get to the bottom of it. The third wife was frightened, timid, yet she held strong even in the midst of fear. Yet again, she knew there was something she couldn't quite put her finger on.
Neither one of the wives explicitly stated the word 'demon' either. Possibly to hide their true intentions from those who might intercept the letters before they could be received by Uzui.
"Um, excuse me, but I noticed that in the letters they sent you, they all seem to keep reminding you not to stand out when you come," Tanjiro spoke up setting down the last bundle of envelopes.
Uzui let out an exasperated sigh and pointed a polished fingernail at them. "Which is why I'm sending you four."
"So what are we going to do, exactly?" Tanjiro asked curiously.
He ran a lazy eye over them and spoke a matter-of-factly, "Disguise yourselves, of course, and as much as I hate it, in an unflashy way." He then looked in the distance, as if remembering something, with what looked to be a sad glint in his eyes. "All three of my wives are brilliant ninjas known as kunoichis. I was almost certain that this district would be the perfect place for the demons, but when I went in as a customer, I couldn't get any info on 'em. So I sent each of them in to get closer than a customer ever could. Since I've already narrowed down the likeliest houses to three, you all will search for my wives there and try to gather information. Suma of the Tokito House, Makio of the Ogimoto House, and Hinatsuru of the Kyogoku House."
Rubbing a finger in his ear, Inosuke casually, and lazily, huffed, "They're probably all dead if they stopped writing," much to Kagami and Tanjiro's horror!
BAM!
Kagami and Tanjiro flinched, stifling their groans, when Uzui angrily rammed his fist into Inosuke's stomach with no hesitation.
The door to the room slid open and the man of the house knelt at the entrance with a small smile on his face. A basket with the golden engraving of the wisteria crest sat behind him. "Pardon my intrusion, sir, but I brought back all of the items you requested earlier," He spoke kindly.
He didn't seem to notice, or mind, the pile of bodies stacked in the center of the room with fist-size craters in their abdomen. Uzui regarded the pile with resentment, keeping his glare on the two unconscious boys who blatantly disrespected him and his wives, with Kagami and Tanjiro shrinking away to avoid his gaze. Uzui scowled, as politely as he could, "Thank you."
The basket held various assortments of clothing, jewelry, hair accessories, and make-up. Uzui himself picked out the kimonos that closely resembled their haoris. He even pampered their faces and... well, Kagami felt like she'd rather get thrown off the Mugen Train again after seeing their end result.
The next night, before the Entertainment District could come alive, they first visited the Tokito House to employ one of them there to find out what happened to Suma, one of Uzui's wives.
The madam and master of the house laid eyes on all four and looked about as sick as Kagami felt. Nervous sweat beaded down their foreheads when their eyes ran along Tanjiro, Kagami, Zenitsu, and Inosuke. They seemed to have shuddered in horror. "Uhh, oh, my goodness," The madam croaked out uneasily, "These four girls... are certainly a homely bunch, aren't they?"
Kagami quickly glanced in a mirror left by one of the courtesans running around to get prepared for the night. Their faces were pure white and as bright as fresh fallen snow. Their cheeks were dotted with hugely accented orange circles that nearly took up their whole face! Their lips were messily dabbed with the brightest and reddest color she's ever seen. Two horribly-done black dots took up most of their fore-heads above the eyebrows swiped invisible by the white foundation. Not to mention their eyes! Their eyelashes were clumped together by the thick, black mascara and the eyeliner was smeared along their eyelids! Their hair was roughly pulled back into messy ponytails adorned with red bows.
Never has Kagami felt less beautiful and more ugly in her entire life!
Even the master couldn't stifle the gag rising from his stomach!
"Sorry! I'm afraid we're not looking to hire at this time," The master groaned out cradling his abdomen.
Uzui, standing behind them, spoke graciously to the couple, a whimsical tone in his voice, "I beg of you to find it in your heart to reconsider. I believe that under your training, Madam, their beauty'll bloom in no time."
The master wasn't convinced, but the madam was played like a fiddle.
Under Uzui's alluring gaze, the madam's cheeks warmed a bright red and a shy smile spread across her lips. "Well, I suppose taking in one wouldn't be a problem," She giggled much to the master's confusion.
"I can assure you that you won't be disappointed. You may pick whichever girl you'd like," Uzui's husky chuckled reached out from behind them.
Looking at Uzui through his reflection in the mirror, she could see why the madam had fallen under his spell in a matter of seconds. He had let his uneven white hair fall down the sides of his head and a strand down the middle of his eyes, letting it frame his elegant face and bring out the beautiful magenta in his eyes. Taking off his Demon Slayer Corps uniform, he had adorned a low-dipped maroon yukata revealing his chiseled abs but kept his Nichirin Cleavers well-hidden at his back.
The madam stifled her next giggle and said, "If we could choose, then I think I'll take the one in the middle on the right. She looks the most obedient!"
Middle on the right? That's... TANJIRO?!
Kagami's incredulous gaze fell on the madam! How could she choose Tanjiro?!
"I promise to work as hard as I can," Tanjiro's squeaky voice came through as he smiled brightly through the thick layer of make-up on his face.
They left as quickly as they arrived before they could change their mind. Kagami was still fuming with her fists balled at her sides. How could that woman choose Tanjiro over her?! Kagami's the real girl there! The only girl among their group! Tanjiro is admittedly quite cute and his kind personality is an added bonus, but in that make-up?! He looked like a complete trainwreck compared to her! Is Kagami seriously not as beautiful as she thought she was? How was that possible?
"Great! Now I'm stuck with you three brats," Uzui growled crossing his arms ungratefully. "I'm gonna have to pay someone to take you!"
Kagami growled staring daggers into the night sky, "That woman clearly has no taste. I am obviously the only girl among the group and clearly the better candidate. How could she not see that I have potential, far more than Tanjiro does? I hate it here."
Zenitsu exhaled a deep, angry breath crackling with electric energy. "Stop talking to me. I don't want to hear it from you."
Uzui was not going to let that slide. "Are you upset you have to dress up as a girl? You said you'd do anything I asked, right?" He harshly teased with a scoff, keeping his arms crossed and the irritation pointed directly in the air in front of them.
"I don't give a damn that I'm dressed up like a girl, you moron," Zenitsu growled so lowly under his breath Uzui possibly couldn't hear him. Or, Zenitsu just doesn't care about facing the Hashira's wrath. "It's that face of yours. You think you're such hot stuff, and it pisses me the hell off!"
"Hey, look!" Inosuke's burly voice interrupted the pissy fit between Uzui and Zenitsu. "Seems like there's a whole bunch of people swarming around over there."
All three of them looked over to what he was pointing at.
They hurried over to the crowd and peered in between spaces of their bodies. Kagami's eyes widened and a shuddering gasp fell from her mouth as her eyes danced across the most beautiful, gorgeous woman she has ever seen. Her shiny, illustrious black hair was held up high in a Nihongami-style with multiple gold-colored hirauchi kanzashi hairpins supporting both the maegami and tabo sections. She wore a long, elaborate white polka-dot patterned purple kimono with an even longer trailing skirt. Over it, she wore a peach-colored haori adorned with golden clouds at the hem with a yellow juban underneath touching her ankles. She has a pink-sakura colored obi and wore black three-legged mitsu-ashi shoes.
Her face was plastered in the same make-up as they but it was elaborate, delicate, and pristine. It wasn't overbearing, instead, it accented her cheekbones, her large yet soft brown eyes, and her tiny, pursed lips. She moved along the streets surrounded by many people. She laid a hand on a shoulder of the escort beside her for balance. Each step she took was slow, graceful, and poised, moving to a rhythm she knew. With each step she took, her escorts and protectors did the same, her body shielded by a large umbrella above her. A kind, gentle smile never left her face.
"Ah! That there is House Tokito's oiran," Uzui said with a charming smile. "Her name is Koinatsu. The highest-ranking courtesan is going off to meet her suitor. How's that for being flashy?"
Zenitsu immediately jumped in Uzui's face with tears and snot running down his face. The look of jealousy and anger looked even uglier with the hideous make-up. "That her?! Are you telling me that's your wife?! How did you get with a knockout like her?! And what?! You have three of them?! Do they all look like that?! Huh?! DO THEY?!"
"She's not my wife!" Uzui furiously screamed back punching him in the face.
Kagami looked from Oiran Koinatsu to herself. The woman was graceful, alluring, feminine, petite, and gathered the attention of every single person near her without even trying. Her smile was refined and Kagami bet the body underneath all those layers of clothing held soft, supple skin with no trace of any battle scars or muscle.
Is that what it took to garner the attention of a man? To be less of a warrior and more of a dignified woman?
Her eyes fell on Inosuke watching the oiran and she felt her frustration flare even more so. "Stop looking at her like that, you freak!" She shrieked hitting him across the head and sending him flying to the ground.
"What the hell was that for?!" He screamed at her through gritted teeth.
Kagami humphed and crossed her arms. She deliberately looked away from him and huffed, "I bet you think she is so pretty. Prettier than any other woman you've seen! Why don't you go and marry her instead, then?! I'd bet you'd like that a lot, huh?!"
"Where the hell did you come up with that?!"
"I'm right, aren't I?!"
"EH?!"
They both growled staring at each other with poison-tipped daggers, a red print forming at the base of his head... but that was until they noticed someone standing right beside them. Looking up, a woman with blood-shot eyes and a crazed look stared intensely down at them. She grabbed them both roughly by the arms and dragged them away towards Uzui. "Excuse me, sir, but I'll be taking these girls back to my house now if that's all right," The woman said.
The annoyance flared by Zenitsu immediately dissipated from Uzui's face, body, and aura at the woman's approach. His voice once again turned sweet and alluring when he spoke, "I see. And you must be..."
"Forgive me. I am the chaperon of the Ogimoto House."
What luck. One of the houses we needed to infiltrate scouted both Inosuke and I... but I'm still very much pissed at him!
Uzui clapped his hands together once in delight. "Well, if they managed to catch the eye of the Ogimoto House, how could I refuse? May I ask what it was about these girls that caught your attention?"
"Yes! Their beauty is unlike any I have ever seen," The woman gushed much to Kagami's surprise.
Does she really think I'm... pretty? AHA! Take that, Tanjiro!
Kagami was in higher spirits when she walked away with Inosuke and the chaperon lady from Ogimoto House, where Makio, another of Uzui's wives, has suddenly disappeared.
In the Ogimoto House, surrounded by avocado green and flower printed walls, filled with bustling women getting ready for a busy night, the chaperon lady held a white cloth. She began to dab furiously at both Kagami and Inosuke's face wiping off the horrible make-up that was starting to suffocate her skin. When she was all done, her eyes glistened landing upon Kagami's looks.
"Aren't you as pretty as a porcelain doll!" She gasped grabbing her cheek and pinching it harshly.
Kagami smiled through the pain but her spirits were soon crushed when Inosuke's true face was finally revealed.
The chaperon lady and the surrounding courtesans audibly gasped in pure delight. Their eyes sparkled with a thousand stars seeing Inosuke's feminine face, soft skin, long eyelashes, and large emerald green eyes that could rival those of real gems. "But this one-! I wasn't sure with all that make-up plastered over her face, but my goodness! I can't believe I was able to buy this unrefined beauty for such a low price!" She squealed. Pushing a proud fist in the air, she declared determinedly, "I'm going to train this woman like nobody's business! When I'm through, she'll be in more demand than Kyogoku House's Warabihime or Tokito House's Koinatsu!"
Much to Kagami's horror and disbelief, they whisked away Inosuke to-somewhere else away from her! Possibly for special treatment!
Am I seriously being bested by a man?! AGAIN?!
Zenitsu watched Kagami and Inosuke get whisked away by the chaperon woman of House Ogimoto.
"Take care of yourself, Inoko, Kanaka!" Uzui shouted after them with the small wave of his hand.
Then, when Zenitsu gazed up at Uzui, he held a pathetic and annoyed look on his face with his arms lazily crossed. Why the hell is that guy looking at him like that? Then, he realized, much to his horror, he's the only one left there! Tanjiro, Kagami, and Inosuke were bought, except him! How could he have been the only one rejected?!
Soon, he found himself playing the shamisen in House Kyogoku.
At first, he strummed the string delicately, slowly, with precision. The stringy tune flew through the air creating a rhythm and melody to a song he just recently learned upon his arrival. He was surrounded by beautiful women who watched him with wonder. He had been overwhelmed with their beauty, their steadfast personalities, and the way they approached the men first with such softness when he first arrived to the district. Now, he didn't care about them, about the bodies that were beautifully and shapely curved to suit a man's every needs. He was supposed to be looking for Hinatsuru, one of that jerk's wives, but he couldn't concentrate.
No, he was too pissed off!
He breathed out deeply, electric energy crackling through his breath steaming in front of his face, and thrummed as fast and as hard as he could! Electricity danced along his arms, the instrument, his hands, and all over his body! His teeth grounded harshly against one another, inhumane growls flowing through the cracks of his teeth, his fingers piercing and pinching the strings, and the bachi pick tightly gripped in his hand. So tight it was a miracle it didn't shatter!
The women around him were unnerved by his talent!
Good! They should be! He was the best! He was able to learn to play both the shamisen and koto after just one listen! He was better than any of them, and he was going to make sure they knew it! Not just them, but that jerk-face Hashira too!
"If you take her, you can have her clean the toilets or do whatever you want, really. Hell, you don't even have to pay! Just take her!"
The thought of that Hashira abandoning him and using him like that-!
I'm gonna make that jerk pay for this! Just watch me become the number one oiran in Yoshiwara!