Chapter 6: Jacob
Nessie
For what felt like a very long time I just stood there. My feet remained frozen to the spot. My muscles remained locked in place. My mind raced as it tried to process all of the information that had just been thrown my way by Aiden. The guy Brian and I had believed to be dead for more than a year. I mean we always knew that there was a small possibility that he could be alive. But, this, well, this was not something that I was expecting.
I only moved again when I felt something warm and furry brush up against my back. I turned around quickly and saw a horse sized reddish brown wolf standing right behind me. This beautiful and magnificent wolf looked like he had the weight of the world weighing him down. I reached out my hand toward Jacob and he bowed his head and let me scratch him behind the ears.
It had been years since I had last seen Jacob in his wolf form. But he looked exactly as I remembered him. No. If anything he was even more beautiful and magnificent than I remembered.
Jacob sighed I content. I had a flashback to my first few months of life when Jacob would give me rides on his back. I suddenly realized how much I missed that and wanted to do it again. I grabbed onto him and jumped. My attempt to swing my right leg over him ended badly when I missed and ended up falling right on my back. It felt like I had suddenly gotten the wind knocked out of me. Jacob pranced over to me and nudged my body gently with his nose. I could see the concern clear as day in his eyes.
"I'm okay. I'm just not as flexible I used to be," I laughed. "Do you remember when you used to give me rides?"
He remembered. I could tell just by the look that he gave me. I sat up and he nudged me toward his body. He lowered himself just enough for me to climb onto his back safely.
I gripped onto his fur tight as he stood up. The feeling I felt when he took off was indescribable. But if I had to put a word to it happy would be it. All I could feel was the wind hitting my face. All I could hear was Jacob grunting with each stride he took.
For a minute I forgot about all of my problems. I forgot about how angry my parents were with me. I forgot how angry everyone was with me. I forgot about Aiden. I started laughing. It was the most carefree laughter that I had laughed in a very long time.
I wasn't sure how far we'd gone when Jacob stopped. He lowered himself enough for me to get off or him easily. I was still grinning from ear to ear. Jacob licked my face from chin to hairline.
"Eww Jacob," I laughed. He wagged his tail. I felt something stir in my heart. I felt a connection to him that was deeply rooted within. I felt safe and complete with him right next to me. I wondered if he felt the same way about me.
"I'm so sorry Jacob. I'm so sorry for all the pain that I have caused you. That I've caused everyone,"
Jacob stepped away from me. He disappeared into the woods. I took a deep breath.
"I forgive you," I heard Jacob's husky voice say. I watched him re-emerge from the woods. I looked at Jacob and I really looked at him. Jacob had a glorious body. That six pack….those muscles….so many muscles. Had Jacob always had so many muscles?
He put his arm around me and hugged me tight. The warmth emanating from his body soothed all of my anxieties.
"I fucked up big time. I know I did. Everyone is mad at me,"
"They won't stay mad at you. I know I can't stay mad at you,"
"Well I'd understand if you never forgave me,"
"I just don't understand,"
"Understand what?"
"Your lifestyle. I don't understand why you'd ever choose that over having a stable and loving home,"
"You've never been in a predicament where you thought you were making the best decision for your family,"
"Because I would never make a decision that would affect my entire family without talking to them first. We believed you were dead. I believed that you were dead,"
I could hear the pain in his voice. Even though he forgave me he was still hurting. "How did you end up with that boy?"
"Brian? We met out on the streets when we were both little. He and his brother were fleeing an extremely bad situation. We kind of just banned together after that. He and I were always together. We became best friends. You know we were always playing together. We always made each other laugh and smile. During the winter we'd huddle up together for warmth. As we got older our relationship changed and we fell in love,"
"and then you had a baby with him," maybe it was just my imagination but I thought I heard something simmering beneath the surface of his words. Something that was anything but happy.
I hated that. I hated seeing Jacob in any kind of pain. I would do anything to make his pain go away. Even if I didn't quite understand what was causing his pain in the first place.
"Jacob. I'm getting kind of hungry. Do you, well, maybe, want to go have dinner?"
"Dinner? As in you and I? Alone? Together?"
I laughed. "Yeah. That's exactly what I mean,"
"Don't you have a boyfriend and a baby to get back to?" His words hit me like a whip.
"Um yeah but not right now. I fed Aiden before I left and I pumped some milk for him. So he'll be fine for awhile. I mean, unless you don't want to go have dinner?"
The thought of Jacob possibly not wanting to spend any time with me bothered me. It was stupid.
Jacob smiled but I could tell he was still in pain. "Yeah, let's go have dinner,"