"Lumine…Gia needs your help! Ei um…is very mad at her…"
"Oh no…she smacked her right? I'll go help." Lumine said. She used a teleport waypoint and ran to Gia.
"Alright, here's the Traveler! She can clear this up!"
"Paimon's a little scared…"
"Forgive Gia please! She will ONLY come to Inazuma if she's under supervision. "
"Very well. I trust you and your judgement. I will be keeping a close eye on her, however." She said, the purple clouds and lightning in the sky retreating.
"Thank you Lumine! I owe you one."
"No problem…why did you smack her again?"
"Cause she's a jerk?"
"Paimon thinks that makes sense…"
=================================================================Gia was relaxing in a tree in Sumero when she suddenly heard, "Happy birthday Gia!"
"AH!" Gia yelled, falling out of the tree.
"Lumine! HOW THE HECK did you know?!"
"Nahida."
"Erm well…thank you. It's my 243 billionth!"
"I'm going to make you a cake…What do you like?"
"Anything with chocolate, nuts, and caramel. Not too sweet though. Thank you Lumine, Paimon. "
"You're welcome! We'll get started now!"
"Thanks!"
================================================================="Hello my favorite allies!"
"You seem to be in a good mood." Columbina said.
"I am indeed! I'm sure all of you have been bickering as usual…It's quite amusing!" Gia cheerfully said.
"Why are you here?" Pantalone asked.
"Surely you haven't forgotten?"
"…"
"It's her birthday idiot." Arlecchino said.
"Thank you for remembering, unlike a certain heartless businessman."
"I'm not heartless for forgetting a minor fact. "
"Minor? I wouldn't call 243 billion years of living minor."
"Well, 243 billion mora isn't a lot."
"YES, IT IS!" yelled Gia.
"Mora? Is that all you can think about?" the Knave asked.
"Please stop fighting over such trivial matters!" Pulcinella helplessly yelled.
"Shut up." Arlecchino, Gia, and Pantalone said.
"We'll show you real fighting." Gia threatened.
The Jester walked in right as Gia threw a chair at Pantalone.
"Will you stop-" he started but was interrupted by a sword flying over his head.
"They're fighting over her birthday." Dottore stated with a sigh.
"243 BILLION CANDLES? WE CANNOT SPEND MORA ON THAT" Regrator shouted.
"MORA MORA MORA! THAT'S ALL YOU THINK ABOUT!" Arlecchino shouted.
"I DON'T SEE YOU PROVIDING FUNDING!"
"This fight is risible…" Sandrone sighed.
"AT LEAST I'M NOT A COPIOUS PIECE OF GARBAGE! PLUS I'M RICHER THAN YOU…IF I WANT TO BE!" Gia yelled back.
"Will you calm down?" the Mayor asked.
"NO!" they all shouted back.
"I'M GOING TO LOCK YOU IN A ROOM WITH BAIZHU! SERIOUSLY WORK OUT YOUR ISSUES WITH HIM!" Gia said.
The room went silent for a few seconds.
" ?" Regrator dangerously asked.
Gia's response was to whack him with Dottore's chair. And whack him again. And again…
"Give me back my chair!"
By then Columbina was laughing, Sandrone grumbling, Childe watching with a smile, and the rest sighing.
"PUT THE CHAIR DOWN!" Pantalone said, kicking Gia. He then grabbed the chair and threw it at Arlecchino.
"I hate you!" Arlecchino yelled. She grabbed her knife and threw it at Pantalone, flying into the wall inches away from his face.
"LIKEWISE!"
"Enough with these-" Jester tried again.
"Stop fighting!" Pulcinella cried.
"Keep your stupid long nose out of it, Rooster." Gia yelled.
"How dare you!"
"YOU BASTARD SON!" Gia yelled as Pantalone threw some knives at her that grazed her.
"Actually, his parents were married when he was born-" Dottore-matter of-factly said.
"KNOW-IT-ALL!" Arlecchino cried.
"Thank you, Doctor!" Regrator thanked.
"All this over forgetting a measly birthday…" Dottore groaned.
"EXCUSE YOU! IT IS NOT MEASLY!" Gia said.
"I've had enough…" Jester exclaimed.
"PANTALONE DON'T HIT ME WITH A CHAIR YOU IMBECILE!"
"YOU HIT ME! MANY TIMES! AND THE CHAIRS ARE METAL PLUS THESE CHAIRS COST A LOT OF MORA!
"Screw you Pantalone." Arlecchino stated.
Pantalone got out a bag of mora and whacked the Knave with it.
"MORA? REALLY?" Gia asked.
"IT'S EFFE-"
"STOP THESE FOOLISH THEATRICS!" Pierro yelled, finally running out of all patience.
They stopped fighting and stood at the table, Gia and Dottore not being able sit because 2 of the chairs were broken and scattered along the floor.
"Over already? Tch." Childe said.
"I hear this is all because Regrator forgot the Wolf's birthday?"
"Yes…" they whispered.
"yegrurgle" Pantalone groaned.
"Yegrurgle? Is that some sort of secret language?" Sandrone teased.
"Shurg urp"
''Hm?" Columbina asked.
"Arlecchino." Gia started.
"We broke Mr. Mora."
Arlecchino gave her a high five.
"Quiet. Clean this up and apologize."
"APOLOGIZE?" Gia asked, outraged.
"Lirk lirrtel kirlds."
"He can't even speak properly." Dottore said.
"Yes apologize." Answered Jester.
Arlecchino and Gia exchanged disgusted looks.
"…"
"Fine." They mumbled.
"Regrator." Gia started.
"Yerls?" he asked expectantly.
"We're so-." Arlecchino started with a choking sound.
"You're whalt?"
"Sko-So-rr-Y" she finished. Gia's apology came out like a gurgle.
"Gert on yourl knees arnd bweg"
"BEG?" they asked.
"This is sure to be amusing!" Childe laughed.
"Most certainly." Marionette agreed.
"We never had to beg! Or apologize! No matter the situation!" Columbina said.
The Knave and The Wolf got on their knees and asked, "Please…Forgive us! We overreacted."
"I shouldn't have thrown my knife at you or threaten to gut you like a fish."
"Or hit you with a heavy metal chair…"
"Or say 'Screw you.'"
"Or mention him.''
"Apoglorgy…DECLINED!"
"WHAT?'' Gia yelled.
"Say prerty pwease!"
"BWAHAHA!" Childe laughed.
"Pretty please! I almost feel bad!'' Sandrone exclaimed.
"Their dignity will be crushed." Capitano, who was mostly silent, said.
"I don't feel bad at all! They insulted my nose."
"Pr-ett-y p-w-ease." They croaked.
Everyone in the room laughed. The Captain's laugh was deep and booming, echoing off the walls.
"I frogrive rou!"
"THANK THE ARCHONS IT'S OVER! I want to go listen to someone laugh crazily." Gia sighed in relief.
"That was the worst moment of my life." Arlecchino complained.
"Laugh crazily?'' Childe questioned.
"It makes me laugh and is fun to listen to!''
They set to work on cleaning. Thankfully it took only 15 minutes.
"I deserve a birthday party after this. Excluding Pantalone and Pulcinella."
"What did I do?" Pulcinella asked.
"No offence but…I don't want you in my party picture."
"Rude."
"Well, as fun as that was, I have a cake to get to. By the way, I like nuts, caramel, and chocolate." Gia said, teleporting away. Some of the Harbingers left the room.
"Let's start planning." Arlecchino said.
"I'll provide music!" Columbina said.
"I'll do entertainment!" Childe added.
"I'll decorate." Sandrone said.
"I'll do the food." Dottore offered.
"You? Cook?" Columbina questioned.
"It'll be an experiment but not since I'm banned."
''Of course, it will." Arlecchino sighed, shaking her head.
"Have you all forgotten the last time Dottore cooked?" Childe asked.
"…"
"I'll do the cake." Capitano said.
The Harbingers had incredulous looks on their faces.
"What? I've been told my cakes are delicious!"
"Alright let's start." Arlecchino said.
================================================================="Hello Lumine! Is it alright is Columbina and Arlecchino enjoy the cake with us?"
"I mean it's your birthday but…"
"I understand…They are actually quite nice you know! If you don't get on their bad side, they are great! Arlecchino helped me beat up Pantalone because he forgot my birthday. Ha, it was quite funny, I get that you don't want to be in the same place as 2 Harbingers…"
"No, it's…alright. The cake is enough for 12, but Paimon will probably have half the cake so about 6."
"Hey!"
"Alright…I'm glad it isn't a big party then. You, me, Arlecchino, Columbina, maybe Venti can come, I'll ask. Do you think Haru will be available? He doesn't like dessert, so we still have 1 more…Nahida perhaps?"
"I'll ask Nahida and Kazeharu!"
"Thanks, Lumine! I'll ask Venti…It's just going to be at the lake I was at the other day…Only a table and the cake and of course chairs."
"Alright."
*Pop!*
Gia teleported to Venti and said, "Hello Venti! Do you know what today is?"
"Hello Gia! What is today?"
"My 243 billionth birthday! Want to come to my party? If you are okay with Arlecchino and Columbina being there of course."
"Will there be wine?"
"Yes, 2 bottles of dandelion wine just for you!"
"Then yes! Though I am a little worried about 2 Harbingers being there…"
"I understand…I was going to bring Dottore so be thankful it's those 2 not the #2…see what I did there?"
"Why would you bring Dottore to a birthday party?"
"He isn't very social, but I respect him and quite like his grotesque work! He isn't my favorite Harbinger for no reason!"
"You like his work? The work that is apparently very violent and unethical?"
"Yes! It brings this sort of...grim satisfaction, as long as it isn't an animal, child, or elderly person I approve of it!"
"On second thought maybe, I shouldn't come!"
"It's not like the cake is going to have a head on it! That would taste much too awful."
"Ehe…"
"Sorry, am I making you uncomfortable? I will only discuss things like this in front of the Harbingers and maybe Haru. And Baizhu. And anyone else who likes that stuff…But please come! I promise it won't be anything bloody and such!"
"Uh huh…Alright. Take me there!"
"Perfect! I've got 2 parties today, so we are only really eating cake…"
*Pop!*
"Hello Traveler!"
"Hi Venti!"
"Nahida can come. But Haru wants to avoid Harbingers."
"Alright! It makes sense. I'm going to get the other guests."
*Pop!*
================================================================="Arlecchino, Columbina! Can you come here please?"
"Yes Wolf?" Columbina asked.
"Want to come to have some cake with me and some friends?"
"Sure!" they both said.
"The party should be ready for you in an hour and 15 minutes…"Arlecchino said.
" That leaves us with 15 extra minutes! Let's go!"
"Okay." They agreed.
*Pop!*
================================================================="Hello guys! Thanks for coming to this short party, or really cake eating…I just want to say, don't be alarmed by my friends the Knave and Damselette. They're nice!"
They still looked uncomfortable…
"Hello!" Columbina said.
"Erm…Hi?" Arlecchino tried.
"Uhm let's sit down for the cake!" Lumine said.
"Paimon thinks that was a good save!"
Lumine brought out the cake.
"Happy Birthday Gia!" everyone yelled.
"Thank you! Let's have some cake!"
Lumine sliced the cake and served everyone some. Gia took a bite and was very pleased. The chocolate wasn't sweet, and the caramel wasn't hard. The nuts brought a nice sugary crunch. Just the way she liked it.
"This is perfect! The exact way I love it!''
"Paimon thinks this is really good cake!"
The guests nodded in agreement. There was cups of water and 2 bottles of wine, which Venti was drinking. Everyone was tense. The Harbingers looked like they wanted to murder everyone there. Venti kept nervously saying 'ehe' and Paimon barely ate. Gia practically sighed in relief when they were interrupted by some tigers.
"It seems we have some party crashers!" Gia said, trying to hide her relief.
"Shall we fight them?" Arlecchino asked.
"No, I'll teleport them away…" Gia said.
*Pop!*
"Good thing I've been practicing…"
Things resumed and soon everyone left except the Harbingers.
"Well, time to get back!" Columbina said.
"Okay! Grab my arm!'' Gia asked.
"Alright." They agreed.
*Pop!*
"Alright…15 minutes to spare…I'm going to sit down for a little outside the door."
''We'll come when we're ready." Arlecchino explained.
Gia waved and sat down on a chair after summoning one from a portal.
=================================================================BOOM!
7 minutes later a loud explosion came. Gia put her ear to the door.
*inside the room*
"I TOLD YOU!" Childe yelled.
Dottore walked out of the kitchen. His clothes were singed and so was the kitchen.
"Don't worry, I saved the food!" the Doctor announced.
Inside the kitchen, on the table, the cake and food were shielded by ice.
"It's not even burnt!" Columbina exclaimed.
"But Dottore…Why can't you cook, yet you do much more impressive feats?" Capitano questioned.
"I cooked well, I just added something to speed up the cooking progress!"
"…"
*Back outside the room*
Gia observed a reality until a few minutes later, Damselette came out the door.
''Well, that was a disturbing reality…'' Gia mumbled to herself.
"Oh, Columbina!"
They walked through the door. She looked to the side of the kitchen but paid no mind.
"Happy birthday." The Harbingers present said.
"Thank you, my favorite allies!"
They all sat down, and Capitano brought out the cake. They sliced it and handed it out. Gia was surprised after taking a bite.
"Who made this again?" she asked.
"Me.' Capitano answered.
Gia's eyes widened.
"You…the ever-righteous Captain…Baked this delicious cake?"
"Indeed."
"It is wonderful! Thank you, Capitano."
"I'm pleased you enjoyed it."
Gia and the Harbingers conversed and enjoyed the food. Columbina's singing lifted all the little tension that was in the air. It was calming. They finished the cake and eventually the place was all but deserted.
"Great they left the cleaning to me!" Gia complained. She quickly teleported the mess away, however, and soon left for Liyue. With a *Pop!* she teleported to Bubu Pharmacy.