The Shadows of the Past

by Golden Flame 611

When 17-year-old Riza, recently enrolled in the military academy, gets pregnant by Roy, she must make the difficult decision to separate from her baby to protect him from the military and the consequences of breaking the anti-fraternization law. Years later, unaware of her son's whereabouts, he would return to her as the Fullmetal Alchemist, Edward Elric. (Parental, Royai, EdWin)

25. Time to heal

A/N: Hello! :)

We have reached chapter 25 of our not so little story :D After so many emotions and dangers it's time to let our main characters rest a bit so they can recover. We hope you enjoy this chapter and as always thank you very much for reading and commenting 3

Special thanks to shinho4869, Drumboy100, Elvenstar146, dragonball256 and Monospider!

MonoSpider: Certainly those are very interesting scenarios, you don't have any idea how hard it was to define which path to follow for our story because all the variants are very interesting. We are even considering making a series of one-shots about some of these scenarios once we have finished the story, let's see. Thank you so much for your words! We hope that you continue enjoying the story and let us know your thoughts about it. Have a nice day!

See you in two weeks!

Golden and Flame

Disclaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist characters do not belong to us. We're just having fun with them.

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Chapter 25. Time to heal

It all happened so fast that Roy barely had time to react. Since returning from delivering his coat, Riza had placed her hand on his forearm to let him know she was there and to help him when they decided it was time to leave the place. Roy had felt her hand tremble slightly but naively believed it was due to the storm of emotions she must be feeling in addition to her frustration at not being able to be near her son. However, in retrospect, he should not have been confident of the conclusion he had come to, had he thought about all the injuries and physical exertion Riza had gone through in the last 24 hours perhaps he would have foreseen the fainting spell she suffered.

Having Riza's hand on his forearm helped him to realize the precise moment when she lost consciousness. Her grip had loosened completely and, from the direction of her body brushing against his, Roy was quick to react and reach out with both arms to support her to keep her from falling straight to the ground.

"Lieutenant!"

Ignoring his own exhaustion, Roy held her with all his strength, keeping her upright even though her body presented no resistance to the effect of gravity. With some effort he brought one of his hands to one of Riza's wrists to see if he could find her pulse. He breathed a sigh of relief when he noticed that it was there but still felt uneasy at the sudden fading of his Lieutenant.

The crunching of pebbles alerted him that someone was approaching but he couldn't properly determine the position so he didn't bother to lift his head.

"Hey, you." There was a brief pause before the stranger spoke again. "Co-Colonel." Roy heard the sound of the heel of a military boot making contact with the ground. Surely the man was performing the military salute as he realized the rank Roy's uniform indicated. "Sir, do you need help?"

Roy refrained from rolling his eyes. Isn't that obvious? Obviously Riza isn't quite right! Trying to keep his tone as professional as possible (after all, he needed help in order to get Riza to medical attention), he said. "Yes, soldier. Lieutenant Hawkeye received severe injuries during the confrontation with the enemy. She just passed out a few moments ago, her pulse is stable but I have been unable to get her to react." He concluded with a hint of concern and helplessness creeping into his voice.

The soldier seemed oblivious to the subtle change in his tone of voice and focused directly on what the Colonel surely expected of him. "Sir, medical tents are being set up outside the Command offices that survived the explosions. If I may, I'd be happy to take the Lieutenant to be checked out by one of the medics." Roy was about to retort (How could he even think I'm going to part with her?) but the soldier didn't give him time. "Michael! I need a hand here. We have an injured person." From one moment to the next Roy felt Riza being pulled away from his side by the soldier.

"Private, wait." Roy complained but his voice was drowned out by the words of another man who had approached them.

"I've got her, Eric." He addressed the first soldier. "Colonel." Roy moved his head hoping he could get the right address as the newly arrived soldier also gave the military salute. "Don't worry, we'll get her to the medical area."

"I'll go too." Roy replied.

"As you wish, Colonel. That way a doctor can check you out because I can see you didn't come out of all this commotion unscathed, although, from the wounds I can tell, it would be better if we carry her."

Without waiting for a response, the soldiers set out on their way to the medical tents without even paying attention to whether Roy was following them or not. There were so many wounded and people to rescue from the rubble that they had no time to waste.

Roy followed them a couple of steps before abruptly stopping. "Shit." He cursed as he clenched his hands into fists. There were so many noises around him that his concentration wasn't enough for him to confidently follow in the footsteps of the soldiers who had taken Riza. Apparently his performance was credible enough that none of the soldiers noticed that he was blind. In some ways he was still resisting his new reality, so he was unable to repeat that he was blind. Each of the times he had done so he had felt worse and, naively, he believed that not saying it would make him feel better. Damn my pride. He himself wanted to make sure he got Riza to safety but the rational part of him had made him realize that he most likely wouldn't make it and that he might even cause Riza's wound to open up again if they had a fall or a bad collision because of him. The soldiers had fallen to him from the sky but even so Roy did not have the courage to confess the seriousness of his own condition. Had he done so, he might now be being guided by one of them to the place where they would attend to Riza.

Holding back his intentions to kick a stone in the road to take out some of his frustration (either way it was likely that he wouldn't hit one or that he would hit one and end up directing it at a passing person), Roy began to walk slowly forward. He wasn't entirely sure if he was going the right way but maybe someone would call out to him before he hit a wall and, with their help, he could somehow manage to locate himself without having to divulge the state of his eyes.

He had barely gone a couple of meters when, ironically, a stone crossed his path causing him to stumble. He was going straight face first into the ground when someone held him by the back of his military jacket.

"That certainly would have been a painful fall."

Recognizing the voice, Roy said. "Major Armstrong, weren't you supposed to be with the Elrics?" He asked as Alex helped him regain his balance.

"Indeed but in my family there is a surveillance technique that has been passed down from generation to generation that allows us to become aware of what is going on in our surroundings." He said proudly before speaking in a softer tone. "I could see that a couple of soldiers took Lieutenant Hawkeye away. What happened?"

Roy let out a frustrated sigh. "From one moment to the next she passed out. Fortunately those soldiers didn't take long to show up so they could take her to the medical tents they're setting up at Command because I..." Instinctively he put a hand to his eyes but quickly lowered it reprimanding himself for having done so. You earned it so don't complain. "I was just heading over there now. I want to make sure she gets the medical attention she needs."

"Hmmm." Alex folded his arms and scanned his surroundings with his gaze. "It looks to me like the tents are being set up in the east side offices." Trying to sound casual as he noticed Roy was in some sort of denial at what had happened with his eyes, he said. "You were taking a bit of a longer way, Colonel. If you like I can accompany you." He placed a hand on Roy's shoulder to guide him but he quickly pushed it away.

"I appreciate that, Major, but I don't need any help."

"Sir, but-"

"I'm blind?" He asked bitterly. "Thank you for your accuracy, Major." He pointed to his own eyes with one finger. "I guess this is the least I deserve for all the damage I've caused in my miserable life so I should feel lucky, don't you think?"

"But you're a good man, Colonel." Trying to turn the conversation calmer, he said. "I insist that we should go together. I think my shoulder might need a good check up." He said as he moved a little the shoulder that Sloth had dislocated earlier.

"I'm not going to stop you, Major." Alex smiled believing his support had been accepted. "I'll go at my own pace. I have to learn to fend for myself or else I definitely won't be able to do anything for this country." Taking a step to his side hoping to dodge the stone that had tripped him previously, Roy started walking.

Alex followed close behind. "I understand your point, Colonel, but Central Command is a mess. There's debris everywhere and..." he gulped. "bodies. As an Armstrong, I can't afford to leave a fellow officer alone when he requires a little help."

Roy ignored him and continued walking at a hurried pace causing him to hit himself square in the knee a few seconds later when it made direct contact with a huge chunk of concrete.

"Fuck!" He complained as he bent down for a moment to rub the sore area. When he rose back up Alex's hand landed squarely on his shoulder.

"I can assist you in sparing you that discomfort, Colonel." Alex said kindly.

Roy pushed Alex's hand away again, this time with an annoyed look on his face. "I can do it myself! Okay? All I want to do is make sure the Lieutenant is going to be okay!"

Before Alex could respond, a third voice interjected.

"Oh, perfect, how many bones are you planning on breaking in the process, Colonel Bastard?"

The annoyance Roy was feeling was momentarily dulled as he recognized Ed's voice.

"Major, General Armstrong was looking for you. I don't think it's a good idea to keep her waiting."

Despite the brief expression of fear that appeared on his face, Alex hesitated. "But..." He turned his gaze to Roy.

"I'll take care of him. I have to make sure Al gets assigned the softest bed anyway." Ed replied with a smile.

"All right, young Elric." A tear escaped warning Ed that the Major was about to give him another mega hug of happiness.

Acting quickly, Ed positioned himself on Roy's right side and began to walk him around resting his left hand on his forearm, at the same time looking over his shoulder as he laughed nervously. "See you later, Major."

Armstrong directed a military salute at him. "Of course, Edward Elric." He said happily. "Give my best wishes to Lieutenant Hawkeye."

Roy nodded wondering if Armstrong could see his gesture. Now that Edward's presence had helped him calm down, he felt ashamed of his behavior with Alex. He had simply wanted to help him and Roy had taken out his frustration against him. Later he would have to apologize to him. Now... he had to control his nerves. How should he address his son now that it was more than obvious that he already had another father?

Despite the obvious contempt Ed must have felt for him, Roy could tell that the boy was carefully guiding him. His hand exerted only the necessary pressure and gently pushed or pulled him along when they had to dodge some obstacle in the way. At that point he couldn't believe Ed was doing that for him. Roy didn't deserve that care... Or almost complete care. Just as that thought crossed his mind, a tree branch did the same with his face.

"Branch." Ed said casually.

Roy felt the small scratches the branch made on his face. He knew he probably deserved it but, left by the nature of his original way of dealing with Ed, he frowned a little and said. "You know, you say that BEFORE you bump into it."

Ed shrugged but remembered that Roy couldn't see it so he opted to sigh. "Wow, you're finally talking."

Roy was surprised. He had gotten the idea that Ed wanted nothing to do with him and that if he was helping him it was simply because he and his brother had huge hearts.

Roy cleared his throat before answering. "Uh... what happened with Alphonse? I thought you were staying with him."

"I'm the one asking the questions." Ed said seriously. After a few seconds he added. "A couple of doctors came by to give him a preliminary examination of his condition. As soon as they finish they are going to move him to one of the tents and then take him to the hospital and, before you ask, he stayed with May and our sensei."

Roy was surprised at the somewhat casual way Ed was treating him. "Oh." He said feeling unsure of what approach he should take when talking to the boy.

"Now tell me, what happened with... the Lieutenant?"

The brief smile Roy was trying to crack faded. "She passed out and was taken away by a couple of soldiers so she could be checked by a medic. I could tell her pulse seemed normal but maybe the fainting is due to all the blood she lost today." He said as he clenched his hands into fists. He couldn't forgive himself that Riza had gotten hurt so badly when he should have been protecting her.

"She's going to be okay." Ed said, trying to calm himself and Roy down. Without thinking he added. "She has to be."

Roy noticed the concern in the blond's tone of voice and smiled inwardly. I can't be selfish and ask you to love us both but I'm glad to know that Riza is important to you too. As long as she is happy and has you by her side I have nothing more to ask for.

"Well?" Roy raised an eyebrow at Ed's question. "Are you going to tell me why the wound on her shoulder got so big?" As soon as the question left his mouth, Ed regretted asking it as the Colonel's face filled with regret and torment.

Inhaling deeply, Roy replied. "It was my fault."

Annoyed at the thought that Mustang had done more damage to Riza, Ed stopped them both and said seriously. "Explain yourself."

"I dragged her with me into that monster's lair and didn't protect her... I'm a failure."

Roy's words coupled with his expression, made the boy forget about the momentary annoyance that had become present.

Inhaling deeply, Roy continued. "The doctor who sent you to the homunculus leader was the one in charge of making sure I made a human transmutation. Even though his minions had managed to immobilize us, I flat out refused but those guys weren't willing to take no for an answer." His pulse quickened slightly as he remembered the panic he had felt when he saw Riza's neck being slashed. "They... they made a big gash in Riza's neck with a sword... It was the only way they had to force me to do what they wanted." He paused to push the image of Riza bleeding out of his mind. "And they almost succeeded... I know you yourself warned me about the consequences of human transmutation but... I couldn't lose her."

During Mustang's story, Ed was growing pale. With so much going on at once he hadn't noticed the terrible wound Riza had received. He had noticed that there was more blood on the left side of her body but naively thought it came from the wound Envy had given her on the shoulder but...a cut on such a delicate area as the neck? He gulped as a knot formed in his stomach. Riza could have died that day.

In a shaky voice, Ed asked. "What happened next?"

Roy sighed. "I didn't do his bidding... Riza wouldn't let me... Despite the situation, she kept a clear mind to fix everything."

"Sounds perfectly like something Lieutenant Hawkeye would do."

Roy allowed himself a brief smile. "It is... she noticed your friends had arrived and let me know with her gaze. If it hadn't been for them... I don't know what I would have done. She was willing to die if it succeeded in foiling those guys' plans." He clenched his hands into fists. "Fortunately the Xing girl was able to close her wound otherwise..." He couldn't finish his sentence because of the huge lump that had formed in his throat.

Ed was very puzzled by both the story itself and the way Mustang was telling it to him. His birth mother had been very close to death and he had not even been aware of the gravity of her situation. On the other hand, the Colonel's frustration, fear and concern about the Lieutenant was palpable. Also, perhaps it was the exhaustion of the day but now Mustang didn't even bother to call Riza by her rank, which gave a sense of familiarity and closeness. Earlier he had completely rejected the idea that Roy might love Riza but now he wasn't so sure.

After a couple of minutes of silence in which they both dealt with their own thoughts, Ed sighed and took Roy's forearm again to guide him.

Realizing that Ed had no intention of speaking again, Roy did. "You're not going to yell at me? Scold me? Hit me maybe?"

"Tempting as the offer is, I'll say no this time. You may be useless but you're not to blame for the Lieutenant getting hurt."

"But I should have protected her!"

"If you really want that punch I'll gladly give it to you." Ed said menacingly even though he didn't really plan to. "If you've known the Lieutenant this long you should have gotten the idea by now that she doesn't cower in the face of hardship. As useless as you can be, she wasn't going to feel at ease letting you go alone into that bastard's lair." He snorted and added. "Jeez, do you really expect me to have to tell you all this? You should know better, shouldn't you? So stop acting like an idiot and accept things as they are. It's not going to do the Lieutenant any good to see your ugly sorry face when she wakes up."

Roy sighed heavily. "It's just that I was so afraid of losing her." He confessed. "It was very hard to lose Hughes and..." He turned his face to the right. "After what I did to you I was afraid the only thing I had left was her. If I lost her there would be nothing left for me."

Ed ducked his gaze slightly unable to respond. He knew Roy was indirectly testing the waters to see if they could talk about their connection but Ed didn't feel ready. So much had happened that his head was all a jumble. He felt bad about what had happened to the Colonel and, he admitted to himself, he was worried about how he would cope with his new reality (which was why he decided to go and guide him when, from a distance, he discovered that Armstrong's attempts were not bearing fruit), but in his mind he also kept replaying over and over again the words Mustang had said to him during the confrontation with Envy. It was like an annoying echo that persisted despite his efforts but was present enough to keep the boy from feeling entirely comfortable in the Colonel's presence.

After a few seconds of uncomfortable silence, Roy sighed again and spoke. "Don't worry, I don't plan to force you to talk to me, much less do you have to deal with my presence." He gave his arm a tug to break away from him but the boy maintained a surprisingly firm grip. Resignedly he ran a hand over his face before continuing. "I understand my place and your decisions, Fullmetal." He said remembering the moment when Ed called Hohenheim 'Dad'. Ed, for his part, didn't quite understand what decisions he was referring to. "Now that you got Alphonse's body back you have no more reason to stay in the military. As soon as the situation normalizes a bit I'll take care of your retirement papers myself, so don't worry about that."

Strangely Ed was a little disappointed to see how keen the Colonel was to get rid of him. Of course, he doesn't care about me. Besides, as soon as he finds out that I can't do alchemy anymore I won't be of any use to him.

Swallowing the inexplicable lump that had formed in his throat, Ed replied, trying hard to make his tone of voice sound casual and cheerful. "Really? Great! It's about time you got to work."

Roy overcame the tear that wanted to escape him at the thought that that might be one of the last conversations he would have with his son. "The paperwork may be delayed a bit with all this fuss but I'll do my best to get it done before Alphonse is discharged from the hospital because, from what Riza told me, he's going to need a good few days in the hospital to get his energy back."

Ed made a sound in his throat to let him know that he had heard him. For some reason he had trouble forming words but, when he discovered they were arriving at their destination, he forced himself to speak. "We've arrived."

Feeling a bead of sweat run down his forehead at the nervousness of what he wanted to say, Roy replied. "Thanks for bringing me along, Edward. You may not be interested to know it but I'm very proud of you and all you've accomplished. You're an exceptional boy." He concluded with a shy smile.

What kind of bipolar is this damn Colonel? First he wants to get rid of me and now he's praising me? Letting his confusion get the better of him, Ed said in an annoyed tone. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

Roy's smile faded. You do realize that? He doesn't want you in his life. Stop pushing him. Swallowing the lump in his own throat, he replied in a mumble. "I'm so sorry."

Before Ed could figure out what precisely he was apologizing for, a nurse passed by them so the boy took the opportunity to find out the Lieutenant's location. The nurse kindly pointed them to the tent in which she had been placed and, not knowing what to say, they both made the walk in silence.

When they reached their destination, despite how tense their talk had ended, Ed carefully guided Roy to set him down just to the right side of the stretcher on which the Lieutenant was resting. Ed let him know they were at Riza's side and, before he could help himself, Roy reached around the edge of the gurney to make contact with Riza's shoulder and from there gently brought a hand to her cheek, caressing it tenderly.

Ed blushed slightly at this display of affection between his biological parents, but quickly regained his composure to give the Colonel's arm a tug as he scolded him. "Hey! The military and doctors are coming through here all the time. You need to be careful!"

Roy mumbled a 'Sorry' and retracted his hand to the edge of the gurney, not willing to move all the way away from Riza.

Ed sighed and decided to leave him there while he positioned himself on the other side of the gurney. The Lieutenant's face was very pale but her chest was rising and falling at a steady pace. Riza's jacket had been removed and they had cut off part of her blouse to gain free access to her shoulder wound, which was covered with a few makeshift gauze pads.

Shortly after they got there, one of the hurried medics who were tending to the wounded let them know that Riza was fine but had lost a lot of blood which, in combination with the strenuous exertion of the day, had caused her to collapse. With a smile he assured them that in a couple of days she would be completely recovered although they still had to finish treating and disinfecting her shoulder wound and the occasional scratch while they waited for the required equipment and blood to arrive at the medical tents. They would start with a transfusion right there and, when she was assigned a room in the city hospital, they would give her one more. Despite his kind demeanor, the doctor blurted out his quick explanation of Riza's situation and then disappeared from there to tend to more soldiers.

As soon as the doctor left, a new silence enveloped them. They could hear the background sounds of the frantic movements of the doctors and soldiers moving about the place, as well as the stretchers and loads they were moving from one side to the other but, in a way, Roy and Ed had the feeling of being enclosed in their own bubble.

Roy was relieved to know that Riza's recovery didn't look like it would present any complications but he wouldn't be entirely reassured until he heard her voice. Ed, for his part, felt similarly to Roy only now he didn't know what he should do. Being in the presence of both his parents made him a little uncomfortable but, strangely, it also gave him a sense of security. He had honestly come to appreciate both of them before the truth came out but now it was difficult to fully attach himself to that appreciation when, until recently, he had trouble coming to grips with the fact that the three of them were bound together by something more than a professional relationship.

Ed focused his gaze on the Colonel and could see that, although calmer, his attention was completely fixed on Riza. Maybe he couldn't see her but it was as if her essence was guiding him as his eyes were focused, unbelievably, on the Lieutenant's face. Also his hand was still gripping the edge of the gurney trying to be as close to her as possible without being too obvious.

Glancing around, Ed realized that they were covered enough that the people around them wouldn't pay too much attention to them unless they stopped right in front of the Lieutenant's bed. Doing one last check as he gathered his courage, Ed slowly brought his left hand toward Riza's. His hand was shaking a little but he was trying to control it so as not to wake the blonde. When he got it, he held Riza's hand and gave it a squeeze and then kept his hand clasped with hers for a few seconds. Get well soon.

Riza's hand didn't return the squeeze but Ed had to settle for having felt the slight warmth of her hand. The doctor told him she would be fine but she needed to rest so it was no surprise that she hadn't reacted to his gesture. Besides, it was better this way because he didn't want to wake her when what she needed most was rest.

Carefully, Ed pulled his hand away and flashed Riza a smile before clearing his throat to get Roy's attention.

As soon as the Colonel moved his head in the direction of Ed's voice, the boy said. "I've got to get going. I really need to see about Al's hospitalization and I still have something to pick up." He added thinking that he had to find a way back to Father's lair to pick up Selim. He didn't know what Mustang would say when he learned that he let probably the most dangerous homunculus of Father's 'sons' live, so he decided not to specify more about it.

Roy flashed him a sad smile. "All right. Take care and thank you."

"If you really want to thank me you should make sure you get checked out by a doctor. The Lieutenant isn't going to be amused if the first thing she finds out is that you've been unable to take care of yourself for just a few hours."

"It's not-"

"You're injured. Those wounds can get infected. Period." He was interrupted by Ed knowing the Colonel hadn't thought to have a doctor check him out.

Roy sighed and Ed took that as a victory. Without waiting any longer, he started to walk away from the place.

Roy could hear the distinctive sound of Ed's boots. A footfall muffled by the rubber sole of the boot and one that, despite that protection, emitted a distinguishable 'Clank'. Confused, he frowned slightly. Didn't Edward get his leg back when he made that last transmutation? How strange. He always believed that when they achieved their goal, both Ed and Al would get their bodies back at the same time since both of their blood had been used in the original transmutation that took their bodies away.

Those thoughts filled Roy's mind when a sharp female voice made him startle for a moment. "Riza!"

The voice was familiar. He was almost certain he had heard it earlier that day but with so many things happening one after another, Roy had trouble recognizing it from the start.

The sound of the unknown woman's footsteps, helped Roy surmise that she had positioned herself on the other side of Riza's bed and was probably taking some sort of inventory of the Lieutenant's injuries.

The woman snorted and then growled. "Colonel Mustang."

Unable to identify who the stranger was, Roy ventured a faint smile. "Uh... Miss...?"

The woman stomped her foot before her quick, menacing steps brought her within inches of Roy, who had turned in her direction.

"Don't try to flirt with me, Colonel. Even though you may outrank me I'm not about to be intimidated by you."

The annoyed tone finally made Roy could relate the voice to its owner. "Lieutenant Catalina!" He exclaimed.

She snorted. "I told you I'm not going to be intimidated by you Colonel good-for-nothing!"

Roy brought his hands to the front in a defensive manner. "Don't misunderstand me, Lieutenant. I just hadn't been able to recognize you."

"Recognize me?" Rebeca asked incredulously. Before Roy could explain himself, she continued. "Tell me, Colonel, is remembering my face just as difficult as protecting your most loyal subordinate?"

He had reason to justify not recognizing her but he had no excuse for not having protected Riza as he had so set out to do before the beginning of the Promised Day. Rebeca's words only served to rekindle his feelings of guilt and self-contempt.

Roy ducked his head but that did not deter Rebeca. Making sure no one was close enough to them to overhear their conversation, with a heavy footfall, she cut the distance between them to grab Roy by the lapels of his military jacket. "Listen to me carefully, Mustang. Riza has always given her best to help you and protect you going so far as to sacrifice the most precious thing in her life." Noticing Roy's eyes widen a little more in surprise, she continued. "Yes, I know everything. And when I say everything, I really mean EVERYTHING. I was privy to everything that was going on with you two and what Riza had to do to protect you." She sighed trying to lower the level of her annoyance a bit to control the volume of her voice so as not to attract the attention of some nearby medic or soldier. "I can't understand why she's always thought so highly of you even though you wasted no time in replacing her."

Replace her? No one could ever take the place Riza held in his heart, but how could he explain it to Rebeca without involving Madame's girls? Besides, the black-haired woman had gotten one thing right: Riza had always given her best to help him and he had done nothing but complicate her life and, when she needed him the most, he wasn't able to prevent an injury that could have been fatal for her.

Rebeca gave him a shake as a couple of angry tears escaped her. "I've seen her suffer and cry, and she's never complained about the situation she's in. What's more, she always tends to blame herself because things happened the way they did. She never told me but I'm pretty sure she thinks everything "bad" that happens to you is because of her. But you never realize that! You live your life blithely and carefree while she goes about your business so your stupid ass can rule this country!"

Roy was silent as he took in each of Rebeca's words. He was aware of how much Riza had suffered over the years and knew that he was the cause of much of her pain... even all of it. Riza had told him on occasions that he didn't have to think like that but Roy couldn't completely shake off the idea that he condemned Riza's life to misfortune from the instant he thought of crossing her path. Riza would have been happy if she had never met him.

Unable to ignore the, to her, strange and unexpected sadness reflected on the Colonel's face, Rebeca released him and took a couple of deep breaths before speaking again after wiping away the tears that escaped her. "You may find it strange that I'm talking to you about your own past with her right now but I can't believe you can't understand what that past really means. It makes me despair that you are such an idiot that you don't value it and don't give Riza the place she deserves. When I entered the Command I was looking all over for her and when I heard that she had fainted and that there were people who had noticed a huge blood stain on her shoulder I couldn't help but freak out. She is like a sister to me and even if I don't always agree with her decisions, I wanted to believe in her and her determination to stay by your side in this dangerous mission. Even if you are not to my liking I thought you would at least have the ability to protect her but I see I was wrong." She concluded bitterly.

Pushing the lump away from his throat, Roy replied. "You are absolutely right, Lieutenant Catalina."

"Well, then it's time for you to go. You've hurt her enough." Rebeca said as she turned around to walk away from him.

"I'm afraid that won't be possible."

Rebeca turned to look at him again with an indignant expression on her face. "Huh? Are you really going to have the nerve to stay here after all you've done to her?"

"I won't be able to be at peace until I have complete certainty that she is going to be alright. I failed to protect her, I'll give you that, but I'm not moving from here until I can hear her voice. I know I don't deserve her but I love her. I love her like I have never loved anyone and I can't bear the thought of leaving her side when she never did it with me. Today I ended up becoming a burden and even then Riza didn't leave me. She needs me and I don't plan to leave her alone."

Rebeca gawked at Roy's heartfelt and passionate statement. There was not the slightest trace of his cocky, proud presence that she had learned to associate him with thanks to all the rumors heard about him both in East City and Central.

After a few seconds, Rebeca spoke again. "Nice words, do you say that to all your conquests?"

Roy frowned slightly at Rebeca's stubbornness. He understood that he himself had stoked the rumors of his image as a 'playboy' but it bothered him that he so easily questioned the great love he felt for Riza. Inhaling deeply, he replied. "The only owner of my heart is and always has been Riza Hawkeye." He confessed without a moment's hesitation and without caring that anyone else might hear him. He was tired of having to hide his love for Riza. Maybe it wouldn't be so easy to accomplish his task but somehow or other he would resume his relationship with her. Well, that was as long as she was willing to try after the extra suffering she put him through with the whole Envy thing...

"Oh, really?" Rebeca asked with a tone mixed with disbelief and sarcasm. "If what you're saying is true, tell me by looking me in the eye."

Roy clenched his fists. "I can't do that."

"Ha! I knew it. All this time you've refused to look me in the eye while I'm talking to you. When a person does that it's because they're lying. So-"

Roy interrupted her. "Rebeca." He said firmly and completely forgetting the formalities of military ranks. "I can't do it." Listening to Rebeca's subtle inhalation to be able to answer him as before, Roy confessed what he was having such a hard time admitting that day. "I'm blind. I lost my sight during our confrontations with the homunculi."

Rebeca gasped in surprise and put a hand to her mouth. "What?" Roy heard the pair of steps the black-haired woman took to approach him again. He couldn't see her, but Rebeca began to run a finger in front of his eyes finally noticing that his eyes weren't focused on anything and that even his orbs had stopped being completely dark staying closer to a grayish hue. "It can't be..." She exclaimed as she realized that the Colonel wasn't fooling her.

Much to his chagrin, Roy smiled a little. "If you think about it, this" he put a hand to his face "is a minimal punishment compared to everything I did. I killed dozens of innocents and I've done nothing but make the woman I love most in my life suffer." He sighed and his wry smile disappeared. "I've only served to hurt the people I love the most."

A few minutes passed in silence with neither encouraged to resume the conversation. Tired of receiving the claims he had clearly earned, Roy leaned against the contour of Riza's gurney so he could position himself at her side as he had done when Ed had brought him there.

A few more seconds passed until Rebeca asked in a firm voice. "So everything you said is true?" Roy nodded his head assuming Rebeca would be watching him. "Do you love Riza?"

"More than my life. I've always loved her and will continue to do so until the last day of my life."

"What if she finally decided to make her life without you in it?"

A sad expression appeared on Roy's face but his voice sounded firm and sincere. "If that's the way she wants it so be it. I will not stand in her way and if her happiness is far from me I will accept it and support her in every way I can if she will let me."

Rebeca couldn't believe what she was hearing at those moments, but before giving him the benefit of the doubt, she ventured to ask another question in a low voice so that only Roy could hear her. "If Riza hadn't enrolled in the academy before she discovered her pregnancy... if you had found out, what would you have done?"

Roy felt the lump in his throat form again and the pressure in his chest build up from sadness and guilt, especially as he remembered the way he had behaved towards Ed during his confrontation with Envy. He inhaled and replied quietly. "I don't deny that I would have been shocked and frightened by the news at the time, we were so young... but I would never have turned my back on her, ever. I would have immediately married her and taken care of her and the baby." He paused slightly. "That was always the plan, to marry her and start a family, but my damn naivety and ambition blinded me even back then..." He laughed wryly. "I should have taken her with me when we met again after being at the academy... I should have married her so that she would never have set foot in the military, but I decided to wait with the idea of saving up so I could offer her something, but what she's always wanted has only been my love and affection. I've been a complete idiot."

Rebeca let a few seconds pass as she took in the words Roy had just said. Then, after taking a deep breath, she exclaimed indignantly. "Damn Mustang! Why do I want to believe in your words?"

Roy smiled. Although he hadn't realized how close Riza and Rebeca actually were, he did remember Riza telling him that her friend was very outgoing and somewhat outrageous. "Because they are sincere and, from what I can sense, both you and I want what's best for Riza."

Rebeca snorted. "I'll grant you that but that doesn't mean I like you."

"I have no reason to like you either, do I?" Roy said sarcastically. Truth be told he wasn't quite sure if he and Rebeca could ever get along but he was growing to appreciate her as he realized how much she loved and cared for Riza.

"Perfect! We're finally understanding each other!" Rebeca said firmly but with a more relaxed tone. She was still upset with him for all that Riza had suffered over the past few years for relating to him and for the numerous love affairs Mustang had under his belt but, after so many years of loathing him, she had finally found one thing she liked about the man. Her eyes could no longer see but that didn't stop there from being that bright spark of love that his eyes gave off when he spoke of Riza.

Rebeca walked away from the area leaving Roy completely confused but as long as she didn't force him away from Riza, he wouldn't complain.

A couple of minutes later Rebeca returned with a couple of chairs. She placed one on the opposite side from where Roy was standing and then placed the other a few feet away from the black-haired man.

"I brought you a chair."

"Thank you." Roy replied and, as he was about to fumble towards the object, Rebeca spoke again.

"And a doctor."

Roy froze the movement of his hand and said nothing.

"Don't make that face. This good, handsome man..." She said as she batted her eyelashes at the young doctor accompanying her. "...is coming to do the blood transfusion for Riza and, since you're a first-rate stubborn man, he's willing to tend to your wounds on a temporary basis until Riza can be transported to a hospital."

The doctor laughed nervously at Rebeca's flirtation and, inconspicuously but visibly enough for the black-haired woman, brought his left hand to the edge of Riza's bed so that Rebeca could see the wedding ring resting on her ring finger.

"Damn." Rebecca muttered as she noticed it.

Clearing his throat the doctor spoke. "Good afternoon, Colonel. Give me a few minutes to get everything ready for Lieutenant Hawkeye and in a few moments I'll check your wounds."

---

Once night fell and after a frankly frantic day, Riza and Roy were transferred to one of the hospitals in Central, since the military hospital was overcrowded with all the amount of wounded. However, in general most of the hospitals were overcrowded so almost all the patients had to share a room, as was the case with the Colonel and the Lieutenant.

Once at the hospital, Riza received a second blood transfusion, for which Rebeca immediately volunteered since she knew they both had the same blood type. In addition, with the constant medical examinations to which the soldiers were subjected, there was not much problem in verifying that she could be a donor. The same thing happened with Roy, who was authorized to do it after they disinfected some scratches and stitched the wounds on his hands.

That night, Roy couldn't sleep. He was still processing everything that had happened that day, but most of all, he was worried because Riza had not woken up again. The doctors had assured him that it was completely normal because of blood loss and the day's exhaustion. However, he would not be reassured until he heard her voice again. Not being able to rely on his eyesight he could not have the peace of mind to analyze the current state of his injuries himself.

After Roy and Riza were admitted to the hospital, Breda, Fuery, Falman, Ross and Rebeca took shifts during the day and night to take care of them. They were all extremely worried about Riza but also about the Colonel's condition. They did not know how he would handle his new condition, but what worried them most was his state of mind. Mustang's despair at not being able to see Riza's condition for himself was evident to them and they were sure that until she recovered, he would not stop worrying.

The next day, Roy was guided by a nurse to one of the doctors' offices to check him out and do some medical tests, among them to determine the status of his blindness. He had already made up his mind that there would be no way to recover his sight, but he could not say anything about what had happened to avoid spreading information about Truth and human transmutation.

During the time Roy was out of the room, Rebeca stayed behind to take care of Riza, who finally woke up.

"Rebeca?" Riza asked sleepily as she identified her friend who was sitting in a chair next to her bed.

"Riza!" Rebeca reached over and hugged her tightly, being careful not to hurt her as tears began to stream down her cheeks. "Please don't ever scare me like that again."

Riza reciprocated the hug. "I'm sorry." After a few minutes, she asked worriedly. "Where am I? How are the others? Where's the Colonel? And the Elrics?"

Rebeca carefully separated herself from her friend, helping her to sit on the bed. "It's okay, Riza. You're in the hospital. After the battle, your injuries took their toll and you passed out. They gave you medical care in the makeshift tents they set up at the command and when there was room they moved you here to the hospital. They gave you two blood transfusions and you have been asleep since yesterday. The guys on the team are all doing well and, as far as I heard, the Elrics are progressing quite well." Although, how could such a skinny boy possibly be inside such a large suit of armor? Thought the black-haired woman to herself.

"What a relief." She said thinking of the members of her unit although the memory of Ed stood out in her mind. With the reassurance of knowing that her son was doing well, Riza persisted. "But what about the Colonel? He can't walk on his own right now-"

Rebeca held up a hand to stop her. "Calm down, your idiot Colonel is fine. For your peace of mind, your companions and I arranged for him and you to share a room." Hearing that, Riza turned to her right and found an empty bed. "And before you ask me, he is in the ophthalmologist's office. They're checking him out and running tests to see what they can do for his eyesight."

Riza ducked her head. "They probably can't do anything." She said in a voice full of sadness.

Rebeca sighed. "I know, he explained it to his team and I but he asked us to be discreet so as not to spread information regarding the transmutation that ended up taking his eyesight. That aside, all of his other injuries have been treated just like yours."

"Is there someone guiding him? If not I should go-" Riza said making an attempt to get up but Rebeca stopped her.

"Hold your horses, Riza. You're not going anywhere. The doctor said you need absolute rest for at least 2 or 3 days." Riza frowned. "Even if you don't feel like it, you'll have to obey. It's as much a doctor's order as it is the Colonel's. Besides, don't worry, he hasn't lacked attention. As soon as the nurses saw him they have wasted no time in hogging him whenever they can, but even so we see to it that one of us is near him and you. So don't worry, Falman is with him and, as much as I hate to admit it, that Colonel of yours isn't quite as flirtatious and obnoxious as usual, so all should be well."

Riza cracked a barely visible smile, Rebeca was always looking for ways to get her to stop worrying about Roy, because she believed he really was a womanizer.

For her part, Rebeca checked her surroundings to make sure no one was listening to them before speaking softly. "Uh... Riza, there's something I need to ask you."

Riza looked at her seriously waiting for her question.

"I remember when we were at the academy and even the time we lived in the same apartment, you never liked anyone invading your privacy. Not even me, even though we always treated each other like sisters."

Riza shot her a look of confusion. "What are you getting at, Becky?"

The black-haired woman let out a sigh. "When they treated your injuries, it was necessary to change your clothes and I remembered that it wouldn't be appropriate..." At that moment Riza froze and pulled back the sheet covering her to realize that she was indeed dressed in hospital clothes, which meant that someone else had seen her tattoo. "Don't worry, I offered to change your clothes. I told them you were very reserved in that regard."

The realization came as a shock to Riza. The doctors and nurses hadn't seen what was on her back, but her best friend had, which was a relief, but knowing Rebeca, she would now have to explain it to her.

"Riza..." Rebeca cut off her train of thought. "I spoke to Mustang shortly after you were taken to the tents to be cared for and, although it's hard for me to admit it, at the time his concern and his words regarding how he feels about you, seemed sincere to me. But, after what I saw on your back, I don't know whether to believe him anymore."

"Becky-"

"Tell me the truth, friend. That jerk did all that to your back, didn't he? Was it his stupid way of marking you forever so you couldn't look for another lover? Did he do it to satisfy his pathetic male pride? Because if it's-" Rebeca began to question with an annoyed tone before being interrupted.

"No, Rebeca! It's not what it seems."

"So? Give me one good reason why I shouldn't give that idiot his comeuppance."

Riza sighed. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, Becky. I didn't because I didn't want to give you a burden that wasn't yours to bear." Rebeca was about to retort, but Riza held up a hand before continuing. "And before you say it, it wasn't because I didn't trust you, it was simply because of what I just told you. The tattoo you saw is the Colonel's alchemy, but it's worth clarifying that he did NOT put it there. The one who did it was the creator."

Rebeca raised an eyebrow as she crossed her arms. "Wasn't it Mustang who discovered that alchemy?"

Riza started to shake her head but as she felt a slight discomfort in her neck from the movement, she decided to speak. "No, he didn't discover it, he only deciphered it and perfected it. The person who did was none other than my father and he believed that because of how dangerous it could become, I would be its perfect guardian. The Colonel was my father's disciple, for that reason I've known him since we were practically children."

Rebeca couldn't help but remain open-mouthed, how could a father do that to his own daughter? She knew that, from what little Riza had mentioned to her, her father had not been the same since her mother's death, but to go to that extreme? Well, apparently he wasn't the only case, when he suddenly remembered the case that happened in the East with Tucker. Damn alchemist fathers.

"As for the burns... I asked the Colonel to do them when the war was over, even begged him to burn the whole back. After everything that had happened, I couldn't let it fall into the wrong hands. I was very fortunate that during the war, people like Kimblee did not ambush me. The Colonel at first opposed my request, but I did not back down and practically forced him to do it. For that reason, he did not and could not destroy the entire contents, only altering key parts. It was that very night that, in my moment of weakness, I ended up telling him the truth I had kept from him and what I told you happened when we saw each other after the war was over."

Rebeca could not believe what Riza was telling her. As if she hadn't suffered enough, she couldn't imagine that her friend had gone through all that too. Why do you have to suffer so much, Riza?

"That's why I'm asking you, please don't blame him for it. What happened, it was something I asked for from the beginning. He has never laid a hand on me."

Rebeca stared at her, trying to find a small hint of a lie in what her friend was saying thinking that maybe she was defending the idiot Colonel, but realizing her sincerity, she decided that maybe she had been judging Mustang harshly all this time. Finally she sighed.

"Riza, how does this kind of thing happen to you?"

"They are the consequences of my actions, Becky, and it's my duty to deal with them. So please, I beg you not to divulge what you saw."

"You know you don't need to ask, it will never leave my lips."

"Thank you, Becky." Riza smiled slightly.

Rebeca returned her smile. "I'm so sorry to have confronted you with this now, but I had to be sure that the idiot of Mustang will behave himself by being in the same room as you."

"Don't worry, we'll be fine. Like I told you, he'd never hurt me."

"Well, he'd better. I think I've upset you enough. I'd better let you rest, so no moving from this bed okay?" Rebeca said.

Riza nodded. "Yes, mom Rebeca." She said teasing a little. "But please-"

"Yes, I know keep an eye on that idiot Colonel. Don't worry about it. You rest now." Rebeca replied before walking out the door.

Riza smiled and closed her eyes. As much as she wanted to stay awake to see Roy, her body would no longer allow it, so she succumbed to sleep.

For his part, when Roy returned to his room accompanied by Falman and a nurse, as soon as the latter retired, his subordinate turned to him as Mustang settled into his bed.

"Can I help you with anything else, sir?"

Roy shook his head. "No, thank you, Falman. Uh, wait, is the Lieutenant asleep?"

"That's right, Sir."

"Is that normal?" Roy asked hinting slight concern.

"Take it easy, Mustang. She'll be fine. When you were in checkup, she woke up and we chatted for a few minutes before I told her to keep resting. Remember that's what she needs right now." Rebeca replied.

"Thank you, Lieutenant Catalina." Roy replied.

"You also need to rest, Sir. If you don't need anything else, we'll stand down, we'll be outside the room in case anything is offered." Falman replied.

"Thank you."

When Roy heard that Falman and Catalina's footsteps had moved away and the door had closed behind them, he finished lying down, sighed and closed his eyes. He was worried about Riza, although Rebeca's words had reassured him slightly, he needed to hear her voice to make sure she was still by his side, alive.

During his visit to the office, he managed to inquire about the condition of his other subordinates, who were fortunately doing well, but above all he asked about the Elrics. As much as he wanted to go to their room, he could not, firstly because of his new condition and secondly because he did not have the courage to face Edward. Not after hurting him like that, not after hearing the boy's choice. His mind continued to be overwhelmed by his thoughts until he finally succumbed to sleep.

---

When Roy opened his eyes, he was standing at the train station in Riza's town, with her standing next to him, a few years younger. To be precise, it was just after he had learned the secrets of fire alchemy and was heading back to Central to take his state alchemist exam. The train was approaching and at that moment he felt Riza's hand squeeze his. He immediately pulled her close to him in a tight embrace.

"I'm going to miss you." Riza whispered.

He lowered his head to look Riza in the eyes. He didn't understand why he felt like he had already experienced this, but seeing the look in her eyes convinced him of something: He didn't want to leave her, something inside him told him that if he took that train there would be no turning back. Perhaps out of instinct, or rather because at that moment he didn't want to stop to think things through too much, he made a decision.

"I don't want to leave you." He told her.

"Roy, I really understand what you have to do and..."

He shook his head. "I won't."

She looked at him in confusion. "You have to take that train or else you'll miss-"

"I'll take another one, but with you." Roy looked at her deeply and decisively. "I'm not leaving without you."

"Roy, we talked about this, it's your dream and I agree, I'll study while you work on your career..."

"Riza..." He brought a hand up to one of her cheeks and began to caress it tenderly. "I can't walk away loving you like I do." She was about to retort, but Roy interrupted her. "Not after enduring two terrible years without your company. Not now that I know you love me as intensely as I do. Not after I've given all of me to you, body and soul." At this last mention, she blushed slightly, which made him smile. "Marry me, Riza. Now I don't have much to offer you but my heart but I promise I will strive to give you everything you deserve."

Her eyes widened in surprise at the same time as they helplessly welled up with tears. "Roy, I don't want to be an impediment to your career. I would never forgive myself for being a burden-"

"Don't ever say that. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me in my life and I understand that what I am asking is very premature but I am absolutely sure of how I feel about you. Please make me the happiest man in the world and agree to be my wife." Roy said with a pleading look, not caring that the train was making its final call to depart.

"Roy... you're going to miss the train-"

"Please, Riza, don't worry about it now. Answer my question."

She couldn't believe he was being serious until she saw it directly in his eyes. She blinked and allowed the tears to begin to spill over. "I accept... I accept to be your wife. And don't worry about the rest, all I desire is your heart." She replied smiling.

"That one has always been and will always be yours." Roy smiled back and kissed her passionately and then took her by the waist and spun around with her, as the train pulled away from the station.

/

The image darkened and when the light came on, Roy was lying next to Riza, tenderly caressing her bulging belly. He couldn't believe he could feel his baby and would never have thought that shortly after proposing they would have learned that they would soon have a new member of the family. He still remembered how he had to explain to his mother the suddenness of his marriage and almost a couple of weeks later how he had to tell her that he would become a father. He definitely did not regret proposing to Riza at that time because, had he not done so, he probably would have missed out on the pleasant news that now excited them. He closed his eyes with a huge smile on his face.

/

"Daddy!" A little blond-haired, golden-eyed boy barely 4 years old ran up to greet Roy who had just returned from work.

"Hey!" Roy bent down to hold his little boy as he kissed his cheek. "How'd you behave with Mommy?"

"Fine. I helped her set things up for the baby today." Said in a proud tone the little boy which made Roy smile.

"Way to go Ed, I'm so proud of you." He told him as he hugged him tightly making the little boy laugh. "Remember Mommy needs all our help now that it's just a little while before your new baby brother or sister arrives."

The little boy nodded. "Are you and Mommy still going to love me when the baby comes?"

Roy cracked a smile. "Of course, champ. We're always going to love you and now the new baby." Ed smiled and hugged his father.

"Hi, honey." Riza said smiling as she peeked into the foyer of their home as she saw the tender image of her husband holding their son.

"Hi, love." Roy reached over to lean over and tenderly kiss Riza on the lips, to which Ed responded with an 'Eww', making both adults laugh. Roy put down the little boy who started on his way to his room but stopped.

"Daddy, when you're done kissing Mommy, will you play with me?"

Roy and Riza looked at each other and laughed once again. "Yeah, sure. Give me a few minutes with your mommy, I'll change and catch up with you to play."

"We'll do alchemy?" Ed asked longingly putting on his best puppy face.

"If you're good, probably."

"Yei! Don't be long." Ed said before disappearing from the room.

Roy hugged Riza and placed his hand on her belly smiling. "How has this little boy or girl been treating you?"

She smiled. "Fine. It's been quiet today, but if you ask me, I have to admit that this pregnancy has been a lot quieter than Edward's. Maybe that's a sign that this little guy or girl will be calmer." She said with a chuckle at the end.

"Maybe, it wouldn't be bad. Sometimes it's hard to keep up with that kid." Roy said jokingly.

"Chris says that's the way you were and it was only fair that now your own child would bring you up and down like you did to your parents and her." Riza replied smiling.

"She's overreacting."

Riza laughed before kissing his cheek. "Come on, get changed, if you take any longer it'll start a storm with Ed."

He nodded and kissed her tenderly, closing his eyes, as he enjoyed what he had at that moment. He was a lucky man. He was married to the love of his life, had an unruly but lovely child, and would soon have another baby.

/

Suddenly, his scenery changed dramatically to the tunnels below Central Command, as he saw his 16-year-old son yelling at him. "I know you don't really care about anything involving me but if neither I nor the people of Amestris matter to you, you should at least care about the person who has supported you the most despite all your nonsense! Mom doesn't deserve all the suffering you're putting her through right now!"

Before he could retort he was now on his knees with Riza bleeding to death in his arms. No, it can't be true, it can't be happening.

"Riza! Riza, please answer me!"

"What have you done to my mother?" Ed approached in annoyance, pushing Roy aside.

"I would never hurt her." Roy replied.

"Let her go! You've done enough!" Ed shouted.

"Edward, son-"

"Don't call me that! You are nothing to me. Just because you conceived me doesn't give you the right to be my father. You were never there for me, you preferred your career over my mother, over me. You preferred to become a fucking murderer." Ed said with a look full of pain and reproach.

"Ed, please let me explain-"

"There's nothing to explain, the only father I've ever had is Hohenheim. I've been fortunate to have two mothers but now, because of you, I'm losing the mother who gave me life. Let her go!"

Roy felt his stomach twist into knots, his son hated him and the love of his life was dying in his arms. He couldn't stop the tears from starting to overflow as he clung desperately to the blonde's body. "I'm sorry, Riza, I'm sorry, Edward. Riza, please don't go. I need you." When he felt her no longer breathing, he froze. "Ri... Riza, no no no no no... it can't be, you can't go, no."

---

Riza was sleeping but in the middle of her rest she began to hear noises near her. Hearing her name, she opened her eyes and sat up, despite having the room light off, she could make out some things due to the city light coming through the window. Her attention focused on the bed to her right and saw how Roy was tossing and turning in his bed, his fists were tightly clenched clutching the sheets, he was crying and shaking his head from side to side. Quickly and without caring about the dizzy feeling she caused herself, Riza stood up and walked over to Roy's bed to gently shake him with the intention of waking him up.

"Colonel, please wake up."

But Roy was unresponsive, still totally trapped in his nightmare. He tried calling him again without success.

"Roy, please calm down. I'm here." She tried again while shaking his shoulder with one hand as she caressed his cheek with the other.

At this, Roy was finally able to react, snapping open his eyes to find the same darkness as the one that was presenting itself in his dreams. He sat up with a jolt and began to inhale and exhale deeply as he brought a hand to his face. Riza carefully reached over and began to comfortingly rub Roy's back, who was startled to feel the contact.

"Who is it?" He asked.

"Take it easy, Colonel. It's me." Riza replied quietly.

Hearing Riza's voice, Roy immediately calmed down and let out the breath he didn't know he was holding.

"Lieutenant, is it really you?"

Riza started to nod but quickly remembered that he wouldn't be able to see it, so she replied in a soft voice. "Yes, it's me, sir. I'm here by your side."

She stopped her massage for a moment to turn on the room light to take a closer look at Roy's condition. Carefully, she took one of his hands and could see that the bandages were staining with blood, she took his other hand and it was in the same condition. He probably opened his sutures in the middle of his nightmare. She thought.

"Sir, do you feel pain in your hands?" She asked.

"A little, but rather it's something else that really hurts."

She searched his gaze and couldn't help but feel sadness and guilt as she met the grayish gaze he now held. How she missed those beautiful black orbs. She swallowed the knot that was beginning to form as she gently brought her hands up to his face to wipe away the tears Roy had shed during his dream. After a few seconds, she decided that she should call for a nurse's help to check the colonel's wounds.

"Allow me a moment, sir. I'll go ask for a nurse to come and check your sutures."

But before she let go of his hand, Roy took hers. "Are we alone?"

"Yes, sir. Except for the person on duty outside the room. Now if you'll allow me I'll go for help." He didn't let go of her. "Sir?"

He pulled her gently and following her arm, drew her to him, making her practically sit on his lap so that he could hug her tightly, being careful not to touch her neck so as not to hurt her. From one moment to the next, he buried his head in her blonde hair. "Riza..." He sighed. "Don't ever scare me like that again." His voice sounded tired and muffled from speaking over her hair.

Riza returned the hug and continued to rub his back. "I'm sorry, I never meant to put you in that situation."

"I'm the one who's sorry, I should never have dragged you into all this."

"Don't blame yourself for what happened, I chose this path remember?"

"I'm sorry, Riza. I'm truly sorry for hurting you the way I did and for letting you get hurt."

"Roy, please don't torture yourself." She pulled away from him slightly to take his face in her hands. "The important thing is that you kept your promise and came back to my side." She paused as she bit her lower lip as she felt a surge of guilt. "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you about Edward."

As soon as he heard his son's name, Roy startled slightly and ducked his face which was still held by Riza's hands.

He sighed. "At first I was very upset that you had kept something so delicate from me again." Riza felt a lump in her throat. "But then I understood that Pride hadn't given you a break and still those fuckers found out."

"Still, I should have told you, I should have found a way-"

"Don't worry, I understand your motives and, if we're being realistic, even if I had found out when you did, the damage was already done." Roy said bitterly.

"Roy-"

Roy lifted his face hoping to level it with Riza's. "And I'm not blaming you, everything that has happened with Ed is my fault. I never made any attempt to get close to him or gain his trust, on the contrary I just kept bothering him and keeping secrets from him. It was only to be expected that he would hate me as he did with Ross's mess."

"Don't talk nonsense. You've always been on the lookout for him and Alphonse. You gave them information that at the time served their purpose. You procured them and always tried to look after them in any way you could." Riza replied.

"Of course I didn't. I've never been with him, never supported him, never done anything good for him. It was only to be expected that he chose Hohenheim as his one true father because that guy, unlike me, is not a fucking genocidal. He saved Amestris and, even if I'm not comfortable with the idea of that man abandoning his family, at least he was by Ed's side for the first few years of his life."

Riza felt her heart break into pieces as she listened to Roy speak that way and watched his grayish eyes fill with tears. She drew his face to her healthy shoulder and began to run her hand through his black hair trying to soothe him.

"Please don't think that way, Edward doesn't know all the details of what happened yet."

He shook his head. "What good would it do if I've only hurt him?"

"You know, as well as I do, that's not true. Besides ever since you learned of our son's existence you've focused on your goals always with him in mind."

"I insist, and what good is it that I wanted to protect him? I did the opposite. I didn't mind hurting him when you and he were trying to bring me back to my senses."

"Roy, we were all very disturbed, even him. I'm sure he's confused, but deep down he knows that you were always there for him as his commander in chief and even beyond, because even though you didn't know your kinship to him, you've grown fond of him and Al."

"That doesn't matter now. I understand my place perfectly well and accept it." Again he raised his face. "All I wish is for you and him to be happy and if what he wishes is for me to remove myself from his life, I will do so without hesitation. I will not impose myself on his life, I don't deserve it. A father is one who breeds not one who begets."

"Roy..." The lump in her throat grew larger. "It's my fault, I should never have kept anything from you."

"I don't blame you, you did what was best under the circumstances. You sacrificed your own happiness for him and for me, even though I don't deserve it. I should never have abandoned you that time, not after we had made love. Whether you got pregnant or not, I should not have left you, I should have taken you with me, but I was an idiot and I must accept the consequences of my actions. So, I'm not going to interfere in your relationship with him, if anyone deserves to be in his life, it's you." Saying those words, he reached for her hand guiding himself with his touch, once he found it he gave it a light squeeze.

"I don't deserve him either, I denied him a family, I denied him his own father and I denied you your own son." Riza's voice cracked slightly at the end.

"We both made mistakes, but you were the one who did everything necessary to protect us, despite the great pain it brought you. I've had enough of making you suffer, I'm sick of exposing you to danger. You don't deserve it... I don't deserve you."

"Roy..."

"That's why, I want you, when you're fully recovered, to get on with your life." Roy said in a serious tone. "You're young, beautiful, gentle, you're just great. You can easily find a good man who will give you the happiness you deserve, one that I have never been able to give you. I have only caused you pain and suffering." He said bitterly at the end.

"You know better than that. The happiest moments of my life have been with you. So I don't plan to leave your side. We've been through too much together for me to give up now." Riza stroked his cheek for a moment. "I'll talk to Edward, I'll tell him everything so he can make the decision about whether he wants us in his life or not."

Roy shook his head. "Please continue your way, you've done more than enough already. I will find a way to keep working to change this country. Everything points to Grumman being Fuhrer, maybe he can take some of my ideas into consideration or hire me as an outside advisor or something, because the military will probably discharge me."

Riza froze for a moment. She hadn't yet thought about the high probability that Roy would be discharged for his blindness. It was the protocol to follow when a soldier became unable to perform his regular duties, so Roy would now have no chance of being Führer.

She inhaled deeply, trying to find the right words. "We are still uncertain what the military will do with your current situation, but whatever happens I will continue to work towards that goal we have. I will continue to support you as always. I don't plan to leave you." She stated with conviction.

Roy crossed his arms. "I have no intention of tying you to a blind man who can't fend for himself."

"First of all, you're not tying me down and secondly, it's normal for you to feel that way for the moment, but as time goes by your other senses will improve and when you least expect it you'll be able to regain your autonomy."

"Thank you for your words, but I still don't intend to condemn you to put up with an invalid. It was bad enough that you had to put up with a lazy idiot boss, so I don't plan to burden you with my blindness. You deserve someone better."

"Remember, I promised to follow you to hell. Have you forgotten that already?" Riza moved her hand toward Roy's crossed arms.

Roy sighed. "You're free of that promise, Riza. I can't see anything, I can't do anything for myself, I'm worse than a little boy. I don't intend to condemn you to that."

She lightly squeezed one of his arms. She carefully took one of his bandaged hands and brought it close to one of her cheeks. "You can't see with your eyes, but that's not the only way you have to see what's around you. You can do it through touch." He pressed Roy's hand against his cheek. "You can hear, smell and taste. I've known you for a long time and I know you won't let this defeat you, and I want to be by your side supporting you. Remember, we promised to make this country a better place for our son."

"Riza..."

"And I'm not going to take no for an answer. You're not getting rid of me that easily." Riza smiled slightly, a gesture Roy couldn't see but felt with his hand.

He smiled slightly. "Stubborn as ever, aren't you?"

"You should know that by now, don't you think?"

"I just want you to know that you're free to leave me anytime you get tired of me."

"I guess if I haven't walked away from you by now, I never will. I've already put up with a lot of your tantrums so they won't be a novelty." Riza said lightly joking.

"Hey! I don't throw tantrums." Roy grumbled.

"You sure?" Riza continued to press on laughing lightly as she saw the pouty face Roy was making. He, hearing her laughter, couldn't help but wish more than ever that he could have his sight to behold so, in order to not get depressed, he decided to picture her smile, her face and her gaze.

Riza, for her part, felt a slight pang in her heart at the sight of Roy's gaze. She missed too much his beautiful black orbs that captivated her since she was a girl. With the memory of his gaze in her mind, she placed her hand on his cheek, leaned in and kissed him tenderly on the lips. She knew that someone might enter the room and discover them, but at that moment she decided to allow herself that gesture. They were on the brink of death and all she wanted at that moment was to make absolutely certain that he was still alive. Roy was surprised at first but immediately reciprocated the kiss. As they pulled apart, they both smiled slightly as she continued to caress his cheek while Roy placed his hand on hers.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you from having your sight taken away." She said with a tone of sadness.

Roy shook his head. "Don't say that. I don't want you to think this is your fault. We both knew that we couldn't stand up to those monsters."

"But in the end they used me to get to you... they turned me into your weakness and-"

"Don't talk nonsense... Riza, I'm the one who's sorry. I'm the one responsible for bringing you to the brink of death and I'll never forgive myself for that. I shouldn't have-"

"And you don't talk nonsense either. You didn't hurt me, they did."

They both sighed, they knew that if they got into an argument about who was responsible for what, it would be a never ending story.

"The important thing is that we both got out of there alive." Riza finally said.

"Yeah, you're right." Roy conceded.

They were silent for a few moments, before Riza decided to speak again. "I'll talk to Edward and now that I don't have a snooping homunculus after me, I'll tell him everything so he has all the means to make his decision."

Roy shuddered at Riza's statement. "You don't have to. I'm aware that I've hurt him deeply, so I can't ask, let alone demand a role I haven't earned." He said with a slight sadness.

"I will. Besides you should also talk to him, tell him your version, explain why you've done certain things to keep your true intentions covered."

He shook his head. "I don't plan to harass him or impose myself on his life. I will respect his decision and keep my distance. Whatever respect he may have once had for me is surely gone. All I want is for him and you to be happy. Even if I can't be in his life, it doesn't mean I will stop loving him, because I always will..." There was a lump in his throat that didn't allow him to continue.

Riza carefully approached him again and hugged him, "I don't agree. I think Edward is just confused and I'll take care of telling him everything. I really hope he gives us a chance to come into his life, but if he doesn't..." She gulped and felt a knot in her stomach. "I will accept his decision and, just like you, I will never stop loving him because for me too, he is the best thing that ever happened to me."

Roy squeezed her lightly and they remained that way for several minutes. At last, Riza reluctantly pulled away from Roy and remembered that his bandages had begun to stain with blood.

"I'd better go get you someone to check your hands."

"They're fine, don't worry." Roy said unconcerned.

"I do worry. We almost lost each other and I don't plan on taking any risks."

Roy sighed defeatedly. "All right."

She stood up and lightly squeezed one of Roy's shoulders. "I'll be right back."

He nodded his head.

After a few minutes and after the required medical attention, Roy's hands had to receive a few more stitches before they were bandaged again. In addition, it was necessary to warn the colonel that if he continued to fail to relax during his dreams, they would have to administer him tranquilizers.

Once they were left alone, they set about settling into their respective beds, not without Roy trying to ask Riza something.

"Riza?"

"Tell me."

"Would you sit for a few moments with me, please?"

Riza shook her head to herself. She knew where it would all go, she knew this man too well, but after all she had been through, she needed him too. She got up from her bed and lay down on Roy's bed, laying her head on his shoulder, hugging him, which pleasantly surprised him since he thought he would have to use more verbiage to convince her of that. He squeezed her gently.

"Thank you." Roy whispered.

"I think we both needed it."

"Definitely." Roy replied. After a few minutes, he decided to speak up. "You know, now that I know I'm most likely going to be discharged from the military, there's nothing to stop me from doing something I've wanted to do for too long, something I should have done from the beginning."

"Roy..."

"Marry me, Riza. I promise I'll do my best to make you happy."

Riza suddenly felt her eyes fill with tears. "We still don't know if you'll be discharged..."

"But we know it's a very likely thing. I will keep trying by my own means not to break the promise we made to keep improving this country but if there are no more laws in between, I want to marry you, because you are the woman of my life, my best friend, the mother of my child, the love of my life... Make me the happiest man in the world and accept, please... I know I don't deserve any happiness but I've always been very greedy."

Riza was speechless, before the war she had dreamed enough of that moment, but after it she never believed that her dream was possible. She knew she didn't deserve any happiness, but she couldn't help it. She placed her hand on Roy's cheek and reached up to kiss him as a form of response.

"Yes, I accept." Riza said as she pulled away after a few seconds.

He smiled broadly as he embraced her and deposited a kiss on her head. "I love you."

"And I love you."

And in that position they succumbed to sleep, enjoying each other's company and for the first time in a long time they had a full night's rest.

---

The next morning, Fuery was giving the details of his watch to Rebeca who would be the one to take over the next shift.

"Perfect, Fuery. I'll take it from here." Rebeca said nonchalantly.

"Thank you, Lieutenant Catalina." Just as Fuery was about to leave he realized he had forgotten his wallet in the room. "Oh, no."

"What's wrong, Fuery?"

"I forgot my wallet in the room. Last night I helped the nurse carry her utensils to attend to the Colonel."

"You just helped her with the utensils or with other things, Fuery?" Rebeca began to joke, causing poor Fuery to blush like a tomato.

"I only helped her carry the stuff." Replied the lad nervously.

"Whatever you say."

Fuery sighed. "I guess I'll have to wait until the Colonel and the Lieutenant wake up to get my wallet back."

"Oh, come on, Fuery. By this time Riza is usually awake, I don't think she'll mind you going through for your wallet and the lazy Colonel is probably in his fifth sleep and won't even notice."

"But it's not proper to barge in like this..." Fuery began to protest futilely as Rebeca began to push him against the door, causing him to end up entering the room.

Once inside, he began to walk stealthily as he noticed that everything was silent. He was startled when he saw that the Lieutenant's bed was empty but was even more surprised when he found Riza and Roy cuddled and sleeping peacefully in the same bed. Quickly, and silently, he took his wallet and withdrew from the room showing a shocked face, which did not go unnoticed by the black-haired woman.

"What's wrong with you?" Rebeca asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Me? mmm... n-nothing, nothing's wrong with me." Fuery stammered.

Rebeca crossed her arms. "Are you sure?"

Fuery quickly nodded his head.

"I do believe you saw something in the room, didn't you?"

"No... I didn't see anything out of the ordinary." Answered the lad too quickly.

"Was Riza awake?"

"No, she was still sleeping."

"And what else did you see?"

"Nothing." Replied the black-haired lad nervously.

"Hmmm." Rebeca glanced suspiciously toward the bedroom door. "I'll take a look."

"Nooo!" shouted Fuery.

"Why not?"

"Because... because..." Fuery was so nervous trying to find a believable answer. "Because they need to rest... that's right... because the Lieutenant and the Colonel need to rest."

"What are you hiding, Fuery?" She asked leaning toward him to intimidate him a little.

"Nothing."

"Okay, I'll go in." She said as she approached the door.

"Lieutenant, we better go to the cafeteria..." Fuery suggested without much success, as Rebeca opened the door and entered the room quietly to stumble upon the same image as the Sergeant Major.

Oh my, now I understand why Fuery was so nervous. I think it's the first time I've ever seen Riza so calm and relaxed. Maybe that idiot Colonel isn't so bad. If it wasn't for them being hurt, I'd be wondering what this pair of naughty fellows would do. Rebeca thought with a smile.

Rebeca turned around and walked out of the room amused by Fuery's expression. "Fuery, I didn't see anything. You were right."

Fuery looked at her in confusion.

"What? Wasn't that clear, Sergeant Major?" The black-haired woman leaned toward him to whisper. "You and I didn't see anything, is that clear, Fuery?" She winked at him.

The Sergeant understood the message, he obviously had no intention of ratting out his superiors. He had long had certain suspicions regarding Roy and Riza's relationship, but that didn't make it any less shocking that he had seen them asleep cuddling in the same bed.

"Of course, Lieutenant Catalina. I haven't seen anything." Fuery reaffirmed before turning and walking away. "See you later."

"See you soon, Sergeant."

Rebeca sat down in the chair that sat at the edge of the room. All I have to do is take care that no one peeks in until that pair wakes up. I'll also have to tell them to be more careful, although if I'm honest after what they just went through, I guess I can't blame them.

---

Later, Rebeca was chatting animatedly with Riza while the Colonel was in a medical office accompanied by Breda. During the conversation, the black-haired woman made sure to let her know that Fuery had accidentally seen her and Roy together in the same bed to warn her to be more careful and above all to joke with her.

When Roy returned, he had a rather serious countenance, which surprised Riza. She wanted to know what was going on with him but decided to let some time pass and that he let her know when he felt comfortable. When Fuery retired wishing them goodnight, it was a few minutes before Roy broke the silence.

"Lieutenant?"

"Do you need something, sir?"

"Can you confirm to me if we are completely alone?"

"That's right, Sir."

Roy sighed and ran a hand through his black hair. "I need to talk to you about something very delicate." He replied in a serious tone.

At those words, Riza couldn't help but worry and think that perhaps something had happened to Edward, but before she could voice her fears he continued.

"I spoke with Dr. Marcoh and Knox earlier when I had my consultation... they offered me a chance to get my sight back."

Riza let out the breath she didn't know she was holding knowing it was nothing bad, quite the opposite, or so she thought at first. What are you worried about Roy? "That's good news, isn't it, Sir?"

"Yes and no. Yes, because if I regain my sight, I will be able to keep my position in the military without a doubt and I will be able to continue working hard to restore Ishval and improve the country, but most of all, " He turned his head towards the direction he heard Riza's voice, trying to imagine her image at that moment. "Because I will be able to see you again with my own eyes." He said cracking a small smile.

Riza returned the smile even though she knew he wouldn't be able to see her.

"But like everything, there is a price to pay." Roy continued, resuming his seriousness. "Marcoh has offered to use the philosopher's stone to restore my sight in exchange for my pledging to restore Ishval and allowing him to assist in that."

Riza's stomach was in knots. Now she understood Roy's serious attitude and concern. While it would be a great joy to see those precious dark orbs again, the price to pay was to once again use human lives... to be more precise the lives of Ishvalans, as if they hadn't already done enough damage to them. It was a very difficult decision, since if Roy remained blind it was likely that he would be discharged and that, although he had said he would continue working for the good of the country, it would not have the same impact as being inside the military. She also understood that the only way to free the souls trapped in the stone was to use it, but it was still very difficult to even think that, in a way, it would end up manipulating those poor souls who had already suffered too much. She understood Roy's indecision and knew it was a difficult decision, but she decided that whatever he chose, she would support him as she always had.

Riza stood up and sat down beside him on his bed carefully taking one of his hands. "Have you made up your mind?" She asked.

He sighed. "Not yet. However, I'm leaning towards taking Marcoh up on his offer, that way I might even ask him to heal Havoc first."

Always thinking of others instead of himself. "That sounds great."

He nodded his head. "But I'm completely convinced that my debt to Ishval will increase exponentially and that I probably won't have enough life to repay them."

She patted his hand in comfort. "Perhaps, but I am convinced that you will lay the groundwork for a better country and, as you have always said, to prevent something like Ishval's war from ever happening again."

He squeezed her hand lightly. "Thank you for your trust."

"There's something else bothering you, isn't there?"

Roy exhaled heavily without letting go of her hand. "Yes, there is. If I use the stone, I'm convinced there will be people who disagree."

"You know I'll support you in whatever decision you make, don't you?"

"I know and you don't know how much I appreciate it. However, I'm pretty sure Fullmetal won't be very happy if I make that decision." He said in a sad tone at the end.

Riza felt her heart constrict as she heard the reference to their son. It reminded her that she had to do everything in her power to try to get them to come closer and maybe hopefully reconcile.

"Possibly at first he won't agree, but I'm sure he'll understand your motives in the end."

"I hope so." He whispered.

She squeezed his hand affectionately. "You have to have faith that he will." She paused briefly. "What else is troubling you?"

He ducked his head. "If I stay in the military... we won't be able to carry out the plans we'd discussed the other night."

Of course she knew what he meant but she hadn't thought about it until this moment. He was absolutely right, if he stayed in the military, she would follow suit which would thwart their desire to marry. As much as they wished to be together, the two of them could not be so selfish as to leave incomplete what they started many years ago. Not at least until they had restored Ishval and made a clean sweep of corrupt militaries. Not when they had taken so many lives with their own hands. They didn't deserve to be happy like that, just like any other normal couple could be. It was the path they had chosen many years ago. Even knowing this by heart, she couldn't help but feel sad and longing for the life they could neither have nor deserve now or perhaps ever in this life.

Riza sighed. "We both know that possibility was not yet a sure thing." She whispered.

"I know, yet I couldn't help but imagine my life from now on with you by my side as I have always wished. As my wife."

She released his hand so she could caress one of his cheeks. "I must admit I would have liked to but the two of us lost the right to enjoy those things in life too long ago." Riza mentioned sadly.

He brought one of his hands to rest it on hers that was on his cheek. "I know, but I'm still too greedy and I imagined that we could finally have that life."

"Me too." She whispered.

"I'm so sorry, Riza."

"There's nothing to be sorry for. I'll tell you again, you have my full and unconditional support in whatever you choose."

"Thank you, Riza." Roy sighed. "I know it's too selfish of me and I don't deserve it, but I have to ask... will you wait for me?"

She flashed a slight smile. She took Roy's face with her two hands with utmost care and kissed him gently, a gesture he immediately reciprocated. "Do you still have to ask?" She asked as the kiss ended.

Roy smiled and hugged her, "I really don't deserve you. I promise to try my best to make this country better and when you least expect it the opportunity for us to be together will present itself."

"I will help you improve the country and I also wish that at some point that opportunity will present itself to us."

The two remained for a long time embracing, enjoying each of those moments because they were aware that soon they would have to return to the usual routine.