23rd November

I don't think Ron and Hermione are going to speak ever again. They won't look at each other or acknowledge the other's presence. It's beyond awkward and Harry and I feel like we're stuck in the middle of it. I've spent even more time in the library, in absolute silence because that's the way Hermione wants to live now. I've never seen the girl so miserable in all my days and nothing I have done has made any difference. No amount of chocolate was shifting this hopeless mood of hers.

"Maybe you should send a letter to Viktor, ask how he is?"

It was the first time I'd seen Hermione smile all week, "Yeah, I think I will."

"Be sure to tell him I was asking about him."

She sighed as she saw, in the corner of the Common Room, Ron and Lavender all over each other, "Excuse me, I'm going to vomit."

Yes, that's become a thing now, too.

I packed up my stuff and sat in the window seat, hoping to glean some of the happiness that comes with Fred and George. I put my head on the cushion and rested my feet up on the wall, allowing myself to drift off into my own imagination. It was cold, wet and dreary outside, with forecasts for a storm by early evening. As I lay, I reminisced about lying on the bed beside George, both of us resting our feet on the wall above the headboard, holding hands, talking. It's so simple, but it's always the little things you miss. You see, with it being a Saturday, I don't get to spend my day messaging back and forth to George. I desperately craved him.

"Room for a little one?" Harry joked.

I sat up, "So long as you'll stroke my hair."

"Well, I suppose since neither of us are with the person we really want to be with, it beats being alone." He placed the cushion on his lap and patted for me to lie down again, stroking my straight hair gently. I didn't think he'd actually do it! I used plenty of the Sleekeazy potion on my hair this morning, because when I looked in the mirror I was horrified to see my mother staring back at me, "You'll still talk to me, right?"

"Of course!" I smiled up at him, "You and I are still friends even if the other two aren't! Perhaps if we leave them to it, they'll come to their senses…"

Harry wore a grave expression, "I think it's really bad this time."

"Sure Ron blamed Crookshanks for killing Scabbers and they didn't talk for ages, so I'm thinking it'll run its course, they'll admit their undying love for each other and the two of us will be forced to spend more time together again because they'll be all over each other and we'll be completely disgusted by them."

He smiled, "I guess there are worse people to be forced to spend time with. At least I'm not worried about offending you when we talk."

"If I didn't have therapy these last two Saturdays, I think I'd have gone mad by now."

"You mean you're not already?"

I reached and messed up his hair, "Does that make you feel better? Has your inner sarcastic prat been missing in action?"

"You're one to talk."

"My sarcasm has been in full flow recently, thank you very much." I lifted up my hands and used them as puppets, "Have Ron and Hermione had a fight? No, everything's hunky freaking dory. You look a little pale, have you been sleeping? Yes, I've been sleeping my full eight hours, not waking up in the middle of the night to my friend who's vomiting or crying. You look lonely. Oh, don't you see all my invisible friends around me?"

"You've definitely gone mad." He snorted, "I've missed you having a go at people just for the fun of it." He put up his own hand puppets, "My personal favourite – Are you the Lestrange kid? Does a duck quack? Or the best response ever… Are you an idiot? The looks on their faces!" he chuckled to himself.

I stared up at him, "Your Northern Irish accent was terrible, there's no other way to soften that blow. It definitely needs work."

He rolled his eyes before returning to the gentle stroking of my hair, which I think Harry found therapeutic, as Neville approached us. He stopped himself from asking the question he knew the answer to. Harry knew exactly what this would look like when he sat with my head on a cushion on his lap, "There's an owl at the window behind you." he reached over me and opened the window gently, the all-too-familiar owl flew in, dropping a letter on my lap before making its quick escape before I threw the parchment back, "I recognised the bird."

"This will be a stern telling off for not writing to her in weeks."

"Weeks?" Neville swallowed hard, pulling up a chair to sit in front of us.

I looked at the writing on the front of the envelope, the flicks and swirls that filled me with dread, "You mightn't want to be here for this."

"I want to be here," he said, "I want to know what way she treats her daughter, to get an idea how badly my parents suffered…"

A shiver ran up my spine, "Honestly -"

"I don't want an apology from you, Kathryn. I just want you to give her hell."

I reached over and patted his leg, a mysterious smile appearing on my face, "I think I've got that one covered."

"Aren't you going to open it?"

"Patience, darling." I said sarcastically, sitting up, ripping the envelope with a lack of respect for the message within. I read aloud to the two of them.

"My beautiful daughter Katy,
Are you receiving my letters? Draco is receiving communications from me, and he replies. I feel like you're ignoring me and that is strongly frowned upon if you value your life. You are acting recklessly and the Dark Lord is disappointed. You are supposed to be sending me information to help our cause. Do you not care? Do you not respect our family? Do you not hold your life in high regard? You are a Death Eater now; you need to start acting like one. Send me a letter by return owl or the consequences will be severe, young lady. Perhaps I should give you to Fenrir Greyback, I'm sure he'll enjoy you. This is your last chance.
Your loving mother,
Bellatrix Lestrange"

Neville was as white as a milk bottle. Harry didn't move. I summoned the nice writing paper that Hermione bought me for my birthday and penned, yes, I used pen, a short reply.

Hi Bellatrix,
You explicitly told me not to write if I didn't have any new information.
I have nothing new to report.
I haven't received any letters from yourself, so don't threaten me.
I will send you information if and when I receive it.
Patience is a virtue.
KBL

Neville was nervous, "Oh you are a dead woman walking." He stuttered.

"This is the fourth one of these I've received recently." I said, slotting the letter in with the others I've collected, "Bellatrix wouldn't dare hurt me whilst I'm this close to you, Harry. You see, hours of therapy helps you care less. That, and it helps me deduce what she actually wants behind all the threats."

"But – but she's dangerous."

"She's also desperate to please her master."

Neville began, "How can you -?"

"I used to care too much, but whilst I'm here, she can't touch me. That's my advantage." I told him, "Don't you worry yourself over this, I've got it under control. I'll drop an absolute bomb of a letter about a week before the Christmas holidays, giving her plenty to work with as I enjoy time with my actual family."

"Seems like you've got all this planned out." Harry said, putting the return letter inside the envelope, grabbing my pen.

"Don't you dare!" I tried to grab the pen, but he held it high in the air, so I poked him in the sides and grabbed it back as he laughed with the tickle, "Come on Potter, you don't want to be stupid. Fancy a dander up to the Owlery and a candle lit dinner? Feel free to third wheel, Longbottom."

Neville laughed, "Think we could put a curse in the envelope first?"

"Great idea!" I said with a deadpan expression, "Not."

25th November

"I think you're my partner this week," I told Blaise Zabini in the library.

"You think?" he questioned, adding a dirty look for good measure.

I walked away and came back again, placing a piece of parchment on the table in front of him, followed by another, on top of where he was writing on, "Okay, so you're my partner this week. Our project to decode is this paper, here's the code, I'll work on it on my own if that's what you'd prefer?"

Blaise blinked, "It would be stupid to work separately."

"I agree, but with your frosty reception, and clear delight to be working with me, I thought I'd give you an out without you even having to embarrass yourself." I snapped.

"What's got your wand in a knot?"

I raised an eyebrow, "Like you care about the goings on in my life?"

"You're right." He said, "But I saw that Weasley boy giving you a hard time at lunch -"

"Stop whilst you're ahead," I said, "You'd almost sound like you're prying and I know you're not into that."

He gave me a small smile and said, "So this code, do you think it's linked to the planets?"

"Which also happen to be linked to our elements." I sat down on the seat next to him, skimming the parchment. I rose to my feet and walked along the alchemy section and grabbed a book, flicking through the pages, "I remember seeing something – ah-ha!" I cross referenced the symbols and smiled, "The sun represents gold, which is this circle here, with the dot in the middle." I pointed on his parchment, "Salt is the bisected circle, silver is the luna crescent and sulphur is the circle with the cross at the bottom. Please tell me that is of some use to our paper."

"It is!" Blaise pointed out the symbols on his parchment, writing in the correct words, "Shall we have a look for other books with symbols?"

"Sure!"

The two of us joined the rest of our class in the alchemy section of the library. It very quickly became a competition – Ernie and Zacharias, Draco and Theo, Blaise and me – searching for the best books and hording them. When we had a pile of books, Blaise and I sat down and worked through the symbols, making a good amount of progress.

"You should have done Runes," he said towards the end of class, "you're not too bad at this."

"High praise indeed!"

Mr Junis approached us, checking over our shoulders, before saying, "I'm going to extend this assignment for an extra week, so you can both present the final translated piece on the 5th December. Don't forget to have a drawing of all the symbols and their meanings on a separate sheet for comparing amongst the groups and an independent analysis each on what the translated piece is instructing. Our class will be in here on Wednesday morning."

I nodded to Mr Junis, glad to have an extra week for this mountain of work, before stating to Blaise, "Looks like I'm going to have to look at your ugly mug a whole lot more than I was bargaining for."

He snorted, "And I'll have your amazing personality for company."

"Yay." I said, packing up my notes and signing for the books I was taking out to protect before Wednesday morning's lessons, can't let any of the other teams get their mitts on my information.

27th November

"I miss Hannah…" Ernie sighed.

Justin whispered back, "It hasn't been the same without her…"

"I agree…" I said, feeling completely deflated with this day already. Hermione was up half the night and when she finally got to sleep I had a nightmare about Bellatrix torturing me. I really wasn't in the mood to sit in class and read. I don't imagine I'm a nice person to be around right now.

I got a nudge from Ernie, "You've lost a bit of your pizzazz, too."

I rubbed my face with my hands and instantly regretted it, taking half of my makeup off in the process, "I've just got a lot going on."

"Less talking, more reading!" Professor Burbage scolded Ernie, Justin and me, "Break time is in fifteen minutes."

We have been learning about the Russian Revolution and the breakdown of the Romanov dynasty which brought about the end of Czar ruling in Russia. Last week we read about the February Revolution, which happened in 1917 during World War One, in which the Russian troops joined the angry Russian citizens in a protest due to a lack of food and fuel for the harsh winter. Tsar Nicolas II was forced to give up power as a result. The Bolsheviks soon became the strongest political party in the government, led by Vladimir Lenin. What I'm reading now, is how in the October Revolution (1917), the Bolsheviks took the government with little to no bloodshed and Russia became a Communist country.

Ernie sighed, "Are you sure you're alright?"

"I'm just having an off-day."

"You seem to be having a lot of those… in a row…"

I glowered at him, "Way to make a girl feel good about herself, Ern."

"Look, even I've noticed it, and I'm not in all your classes." Justin said, "Just tell us what's going on and we'll try to help."

"One more utterance from any of your lips, I will not hesitate to put you all in detention where you can learn to sit in silence." Professor Burbage's word was final.

2nd December

"I FOUND THE LAST SYMBOL!" I shouted triumphantly. This was honestly the happiest I'd felt in days, and that's saying something.

Blaise glanced up at me from his piece of parchment, "YOU DIDN'T?"

"I DID!"

Blaise took a look at the book, then at my parchment, "YOU DID!" he held up his right hand and we high-fived in celebration.

"Shhhhhhhh!" Madam Pince hissed.

"Sorry!" I yelled back in response.

He sniggered, "You really don't care what anyone thinks about you, do you?"

"Depends who it is." I said absentmindedly, writing out the last of the translated paper, "You know, even with these symbols, this hardly makes sense."

"Sure it does!" he said incredulously, "You really don't see it?"

"The paper is on Quintessence, I get that, but…"

The incredulous looks were now enhanced, "Of course! You – it's one of the first papers on modern medicine."

My quill dropped from my hands, "You're right. Blaise, we are on fire!" I smirked.

"Har-de-har." He mumbled, "And I thought you were cool."

"You underestimate me, Zabini." I smirked, "Now hurry up and get started on your analysis so we can combine forces for Thursday."

He rolled his eyes, "Yes, boss."

After Potions today, Harry cleared off with Ron and Hermione found her excuses to go to see Professor Vector after the class test they had that afternoon. Apparently Hermione thought she had written a wrong answer and at that stage I stopped listening. I stood outside the potions classroom alone. The high I felt in Alchemy was short lived and I felt like I was falling to a crashing low. I didn't like this feeling growing inside me.

Do you know what I think is wrong with Hogwarts? The house system. I have plenty of friends in other houses, but can I sit with them for dinner without being stared at or being told that I'm lost? No. The house system encourages people to compete against each other, to not be friends with people from other houses. I wish, as I stand in the entrance of the Great Hall, that I could sit with who I want. The people sitting at those separate tables are much more than the house they belong to. I know, for me, yes I'm a Gryffindor, but I value knowledge like a Ravenclaw, I'm loyal like a Hufflepuff and driven like a Slytherin, yet I'm confined to being brave, courageous and chivalrous. I don't want that. I want to be free to be my own person, who isn't defined by the colour of tie she wears or the dormitory I sleep in. And who the heck is the same person at eleven and seventeen? I'm certainly not that scared, vulnerable, shy, quiet girl I was back in first year! I never want to be her again.

I guess right now I feel like I don't fit in. I feel lost.

I took a seat at the Gryffindor table on my own and served myself some dinner. I was restless, annoyed, frustrated… low. There was only one thing for it.

K: Hey George, I could really use a hug right now and for you to tell me that everything's going to be okay. I feel dreadful and haven't felt so alone in so long.

I sat there for a few minutes before I noticed George writing.

G: Hey Katy. I've managed to slip away from the shop a little early. I wish I could hug you, I know you're hurting. Do you feel like you did when you packed your bags that night in your third year?
K: I'm very close to it.
G: What can I do to help?
K: Tell me something good.
G: Funny customer story of the day?
K: Do tell…!
G: This woman, probably in her late sixties came into the shop this morning and started having a look around. I approached her, asking if she needed any assistance, but she said that she was happy browsing for the time being. She was wheeling a trolley thing behind her, and managed to knock down a display within ten seconds. She tidied up after herself before moving on to look at the joke wands. When she tried to cast a spell and it turned into a rubber chicken, she laughed so loud, I mean, Katy, hysterical laughing, squeezing the chicken in time with her laugh, too. I swear the woman was about to wet herself. She then moved onto the sweet stands and tried some of our canary creams! You can just imagine her causing mass destruction, can't you?
K: Oh yes! Hilarious!
G: It only gets better! Because when Fred transfigured her back to her normal self, she lifted a shock shake and got him!
K: She shook his hand and shocked him?!
G: YES.
K: Oh Fred. He'll never underestimate an old lady again!
G: His hair is still sticking up!
K: Haha! Amazing! Did she buy anything?
G: The wand, the shock shake and a pair of sticky trainers. I'd love to be there when she tries them on!
K: Me too! Are you sure they were for her?
G: Yeah, she said that she and her husband could do with a good laugh.
K: Well isn't that exactly why you opened the shop in the first place? To give everyone a laugh when the world isn't even making people smile?
G: I'll send you something amusing if you like?
K: It'll just be confiscated. But thanks! Also, thanks for not making dinner so lonely.
G: It was my pleasure to sit opposite you and see that smile.
K: If only that was true…
G: Just close your eyes: I'm sitting opposite with Fred who's flirting terribly with an amused Angelina. You've just kicked me under the table for saying something very racy, and Harry is pretending not to have heard. Ginny throws you that look that I don't understand and you laugh it off.
K: What did you say?
G: Oh, I made a comment about what I'd like to do to you, you know, if no one was watching.
K: Oooh, then I'd reply to you that I have the power to make sure no one sees. That's when Harry chokes on his pumpkin juice. Ginny gasps. Ron can't look at the sausages on his plate any more (Especially when I wink at you seductively). Fred claps you on the back and tells you to get a move on and we sit there looking awfully proud of ourselves for causing all this commotion.
G: Perfect. Can I then grab you by the hand and we run out of the Great Hall together? I'll take you to a deserted corridor and press you up against a wall and do whatever you want.
K: In the middle of the corridor?
G: No one can see us, or hear us for that matter.
K: Of course. Then you can do what you like, then.

"What's he making you smile about now?" Ginny approached me, taking a seat beside me, her lower lip was protruding and started quivering, her eyes were welling up.

"Gin! What's wrong?" I set down my quill and fork.

She shook her head, "Not here…"

"Okay." I quickly wrote a message to George.

K: Sorry honey, something's come up, I've got to go. Talk later. Love you!

I followed Ginny out into a deserted corridor where she couldn't keep her emotions in any longer. She roughly wiped away the angry tears that formed in her eyes. Frustrated tears. She was very hormonal today. I could tell that she didn't want comforted, she just wanted to vent, to get out all the emotions she was feeling. I stood, leaning against the wall, facing her as she paced up and down.

"Dean and I have just had an awful argument." She sighed.

I assumed the role of calm older sister, "What happened?"

"He's just getting on my nerves with everything!" she let out a growl, the figure in the portrait behind her made a run for it, along the frames down the corridor, "I feel like I just need some space where he's not always right up in my face. He thinks I should leave Ron alone, but it's disgusting what he and Lav are doing, parading it like that. It's like he won't let me have a negative opinion. And he always tries to fix things. What if I just want to do things for myself, I am perfectly capable of looking after myself. I am not in a relationship to have someone do things for me, like I'm a lesser being."

"Finished?"

"He's just so touchy-feely." She clenched her fists before releasing the tension again, "Why won't he leave me be? I mean, I can climb through the portrait hole on my own. I can open doors; I can carry my own bag; I can stand up for myself! I'm not a china doll!"

"He was probably just trying to be gentleman-like." I said.

"You're defending him?"

I took a deep breath, "No, Gin, I'm just trying to give you a little perspective."

"He's driving me insane!"

"Then break up with him?"

"If you broke up with George whenever he drove you insane -"

"I wish you would stop comparing your relationships with mine." I said trying to dull how exasperated I was feeling, "I mean, we're completely different people. George and I bicker that's just how we are, we kiss, we make up and then we get on with it. You and Dean aren't equally matched when it comes to fiery personalities."

She smirked, "That's true. Do you see how he quivers when you threaten him, even if it's a joke?"

I mirrored her smirk, "That brings me so much pleasure." I watched as she calmed down, "Look Gin, I know you're very capable of sorting this if you want to, but you don't have to if you want to break up with him, okay?"

"I think I just need to have another word with him about space."

"If that's what you want to do?"

She nodded, "Thanks Kat. Can I hang with you this evening?"

"I'd love that." I nodded, "I need that."

"Can't be easy with everything going on…"

I sighed, "You have no idea… I couldn't tell you the last time I had a proper conversation with Hermione. Last time I talked to Ron was that intervention that failed. Harry and I are still talking, but that's mostly when we need a break from the other two and -"

"I saw you two the other day. Cosy."

"He's no more interested in me than the man in the moon and you know it." I said, "We just both craved human interaction and a normal conversation that didn't involve walking on eggshells. I mean, if I mention Ron's name to Hermione she zones out. When Lavender comes to the dorm at night, Hermione can't deal with her stories of how Won-Won is such a good boyfriend and -"

"That's enough to make me want to vomit too…" she rolled her eyes, "Let's get more food and have a girly night."

5th December

Blaise and I went last in the discussion of our translated paper. The whole thing seemed to run rather smoothly and both Blaise and I complemented each other rather well. The only other person I felt the same amount of input from was Draco, but we worked in a completely different way. Draco and I chatted our way through our work, whereas Blaise and I were very independent. Anyway, after we finished our presentations, we had time for tea and chocolate biscuits and I feel like that is a very important thing to mention.

"We both got O's for our work this week," Blaise said as we walked out of the Alchemy classroom together, "I had a look over Junis' shoulder when I grabbed a few biscuits."

"That's great!" I smiled, "I'm sure you're delighted at the prospect of working with someone else next week?"

He shrugged his shoulders, "Working with you wasn't completely awful."

"I'm glad." I nodded.

"Are you going to the Slug Club Christmas party?" he changed the topic of conversation, but asked as though we had been talking about the party already.

"No." I shook my head.

"Want to be my date for the night?"

I laughed, "Are you having a laugh?"

"No!"

"Why are you asking me?"

"Because I want to go with you – look, if you don't want to -"

I smirked, holding up my hand, "I didn't say no."

He let out a deep breath, his lips curling upwards, "So you'll come with me?"

"Look," I said slowly, and I could see the disappointment growing in his eyes, "I just need to rearrange a few things, okay? I'm supposed to be having a meeting with McGonagall… If I can get it swapped, I'll come with you, if you really want me to?"

He nodded, "Let me know, yeah?" he turned to walk downstairs towards the Slytherin Common Room, the two of us now standing in the entrance hall.

"Blaise?"

"Yeah?"

I opened my mouth to speak, but closed it again, thinking of all the consequences of going to this party with Blaise Zabini, "You swear this isn't a joke?"

"Want me to do an unbreakable vow or something? Look, you're a girl and you're alright and I need a date for this party."

"Okay." I said, "Now that sounded more believable."

He smiled and walked with the swagger of a Slytherin towards the door and was soon out of sight. That was weird. I dropped off my Alchemy books and grabbed my Potions and Herbology books before I wrote a quick message to George.

K: Hey Georgie, Blaise Zabini asked me to go to the Slug Club Christmas party with him, he's a Slytherin guy in my year. I haven't given him my response yet, but I thought it'd be a good opportunity – to show my mum that I can interact with other Slytherins and there's bound to be loads of people there to glean information off. Harry, Hermione and Ginny will be there, too.
G: I don't know about this, Katy… I'm assuming he doesn't know about us?
K: No, he doesn't… But he's a stuck up, selfish bloke who merely asked me to make himself look good. He doesn't like me like that.
G: If he's so obnoxious, why are you wanting to go with him?
K: I wouldn't choose him, but he's offering me a night out where I can network.
G: I really don't think this is a good idea. I know what guys that age think and feel. Don't you think he would have asked a Slytherin girl before asking you, unless he fancies you?
K: So what if he does, George? It's not like I plan on getting off with him. I can explicitly tell him that we're going as friends if that makes you feel better?
G: I wish it did.
K: Come on George, I'll be hanging around with Harry and Hermione all evening and I can't stand to be around Ron and Lavender with them constantly sucking each other's faces off. Please just trust me, please! I feel like I need this.
G: You're going to do whatever you want anyway, aren't you?
K: I don't want to fight about this. Just think about it. I'll talk to you later; I need to get to class.

That went well.

6th December

"Did you get a chance to speak to McGonagall?" Blaise approached me at the end of double Transfiguration this morning.

"About what?" Hermione asked, thinking he was addressing her.

"I haven't no… She's been busy." I made up a very quick excuse, George still wasn't too happy with me last night, he thinks that Blaise is going to make a move on me or turn out to be a double crosser or do something to hurt me. He's just jealous and needs space, but I can't give him that if Blaise is quite determined to get my answer.

"Well, the offer is still on the table." He walked away, "And McGonagall's still in her classroom?"

Hermione gave me a questioning look, "What is going on here? What do you need to speak to McGonagall about?"

I turned to face her, "He asked me to go to the Christmas Party with him."

The shock on her face said it all, "Oh."

"Excuse me, Professor McGonagall?" Blaise approached our teacher as she left her classroom for break time, "Might I have a minute of your time?"

Gosh, he's very polite.

"What is it, Mr Zabini?"

"I have asked Kathryn to go to Professor Slughorn's Christmas Party with me and I believe she has a meeting with yourself? Is there any way this can be rescheduled?"

"Meeting, Miss Pink? What meeting?"

Blaise looked at me as though I'd been lying, hurt etched over his face. I needed to fix this, "I come to see you every weekend? The party is on the Friday evening?" When Blaise looked to our teacher, I mimed the word 'Maura'.

Realisation spread over her face, "Ah, yes, of course. We will have to rearrange, then. If you come to my office tomorrow, we can discuss it then to find something that suits us both. I'm afraid I have misplaced my diary." McGonagall walked away.

I felt like I was in a hole of sinking sand. I was expecting her to be a bit harsher, making me work harder for the approval, but no, she gave it and now I've to explain to George, my jealous boyfriend, that I'm now going to the party with another guy. SINKING.

"Excellent!" he said, "I'll pick you up outside the Gryffindor Common Room at 8?"

"Sure." I nodded.

When he turned to walk away I said, "Blaise?"

He rolled his eyes, "Still not a joke."

"I kind of believe that now, thanks." I said cheekily, "I was actually going to ask – is this the sort of party where we're supposed to wear the same colour?"

He shook his head and snorted, "Wouldn't want us to look like a couple."

"Good," I said, "I don't think I'd go if I actually had to be nice and associate with your face all evening. I'm definitely going for the free food."

He nodded and smiled, walking away.

"That went terribly."

Hermione stared at me. I could feel the daggers as we walked towards the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Your face is just how I imagine George's to be... That look of disapproval -"

"Wait." She stopped me in the middle of a moving staircase, other students moodily walked around us, "You actually want to go? With him?"

I scoffed, "You're one to talk! Going with McLaggen!"

"That's different!"

"It's not. You're going to get Ron jealous. I'm going to get into Bellatrix's good books."

She paused and thought for a second, "When you put it like that, it makes sense, but why him?"

"He's the one who asked me!" I shrugged my shoulders, wondering why he'd asked me, of all the girls to choose from. He's probably alienated them all, if he talks to any of them, insulting them like he insults me. Or at least had when we started the project. I feel like now he can at least bare to sit beside me. At a stretch. He's always been a bit of a loner, now that I come to think of it.

"Do you think he likes you?" she asked, "I mean, it's not like the two of you appear to get on?"

"We constantly insult each other. We've been friendly in the loosest sense of the word and he's spent the majority of his time ignoring my presence as we've worked together. Maybe he's asked me to get back at somebody?"

She laughed, "This is all just so… unexpected."

"It's one night." I said, "One. And the two of us will be able to spend the night together avoiding our dates? Having intellectual conversations… Eating nice food… An opportunity to get dressed up…?"

"It sounds better when you say it like that."

On Fridays, Hermione and I have one of our rare free periods together, and because Harry and Ron went to the library, Hermione and I stayed in the common room. This is becoming the norm now and I'm getting used to the loneliness. Some days are certainly better than others. Hermione seemed to be in good spirits after learning that I'm going to Slughorn's party with her. Hopefully the positivity will last.

"So I'm going to avoid the topic with George for as long as I can." I said, finding myself completely distracted from doing my work, "But in the meantime, I'm going to initiate Project: Kathryn Stays Alive over Christmas. PKSAC for short."

Hermione set down her quill and devoted her attention to me. She realised just how important it was to get this evening right, to keep my relationship with George going strong, "Do you know what I'm thinking and I'm saying this in the nicest way possible? Slughorn isn't going to be happy to see you at his party, I mean -"

"I've been keeping my head down, I'm doing well in potions, not like we could ever match precious Harry, but I'd like to think he doesn't see me as a conventional Death Eater's kid."

She shrugged her shoulders, "Well, he mightn't throw you out… immediately."

"And that's what I'm banking on." I pushed my books out of my way and summoned some of my writing supplies.

"What are you going to do?"

I smiled, "Cinderella needed a fairy godmother to go to the ball." I started writing, "If I'm going to get what I want, I'm going to have to do a bit of sucking up and this isn't something I'm going to be proud of."

Dear Auntie Cissa and Mum,
Hope you're both well.
I need a favour. I've been hard at work getting myself an invite to the highly anticipated end of term party hosted by Professor Slughorn. I've made friends with Blaise Zabini whose asked me to be his date for the evening. Must have been my delightful personality. Anyone who's anyone, who can be connected to Slughorn is going to be there, and we all know what that means… Insider info.
I've heard a rumour that the Minister for Magic will be there, and based on my contempt for Fudge, Scrimgeour cannot hate me more than Fudge did. I'll try and find out what he knows and any plans for the future. Think of the opportunities.
I need a statement dress. One that doesn't scream Death Eater but says stylish, sophisticated and gives off a good impression. Nothing too sexy, tight or short, I need this evening to go well. You also know my love for shoes, you know what I like to ACCESSORISE. I have the earrings you got me for Christmas, Cissa and I can't think of a better opportunity to showcase them. Can you both help me? I know you won't let me down. You can take the money out from my Vault.
Looking forward to hearing back from you,
KBL x

"Bold move." Hermione read over my shoulder.

I ran my tongue along my upper teeth, "A girl has got to make a statement. I'm playing this like my life depends on it."

8th December

This morning I got a reply letter from Malfoy Manor.

Hello Kathryn,
Lovely to hear from you.
You know I love shopping. You can count on me.
Love, Cissa x

I punched the air, "Boom!"

"She said yes?"

"Oh yeahhh!" I beamed, "Things are finally going my way!"

Hermione eyed me up, "You haven't seen the dress yet!"

"I already know it's going to be gorgeous."

11th December

"Can I please sit here?"

"I don't know, can you?" was Blaise's response.

Draco shot Blaise a dirty look before giving me his full attention, I sat down, having planned on sitting there, asking was just a formality, "What's happened?"

I grimaced, "I thought he was bad." I glanced at Blaise, the two of us sharing what was now the joking look of disgust, "But Smith? He's -" I pulled a face, "I mean, he's disgusting and rude and vile and -" I swallowed hard, "Ew."

"And what do you want me to do?"

"Oh, I just looked for the nearest table that didn't have any other seats left at it." I shrugged my shoulders, slamming my pile of books onto the table, "I don't know how many times I have to tell the guy how I've split up the work, so I'm just going to – Actually, this rant isn't helping. As you were." I had abandoned Zacharias Smith in the Alchemy section of the library where I was at risk of getting banned from the library if I was going to be forced to endure that boy any longer. I very much need the library.

Blaise started laughing.

"You could always curse him?" Theo suggested, "You seem to do that sort of thing when people annoy you."

I stopped what I was doing and glared at Theo, "Is that how little you think of me?"

"He actually thinks about you a lot." Blaise smirked, "You can call me Theo." He mocked.

I don't know what I walked into, "Way to make it awkward." I gave Blaise I kick under the table, "You'll find that I don't tend to call anyone by their surname. Don't be an asshole."

"That's you told." Draco smirked across the table at me.

"You'll still go to the party with me, won't you? I promise I'll be nice."

I raised an eyebrow.

"Wait." Draco said, "You're going to Sluggy's party with my – Kathryn?"

"Your Kathryn?" Blaise looked at Draco incredulously.

Draco's tired eyes fell upon mine. This was the first time in a while that I had a good look at him; he looked tired and pale, like he'd seen too many hours on the clock, too many nights in a row. Disbelief filled his face and disappointment. But there was nothing he could do about it, "Yes, my cousin Kathryn, you hurt her and I'll break your face."

"Aw, no Draco, let me break his face." I teased, "It'll be much more impressive if I do it in heels."

"Can you both just leave my face be?" Blaise stroked his cheeks with his hands, "It's -"

I laughed, "If you're going to say it's too pretty, think again. One look at your face and children cry."

"And they don't cry when they look at you?"

I smiled, "Oh, I'm not the one being vain. I know I'm ugly. I accepted that loooong ago. Perhaps if you didn't scowl as much, you wouldn't have those crow's feet -"

"Where?" he looked shocked.

I busied myself with my work at that point. Draco and Theo were bemused by the whole situation whilst Blaise excused himself to the bathrooms where he could check himself out. That boy couldn't love me; he loves himself far too much.

14th December

G: Okay, so I know we've been avoiding talking about this, but I need to get this off my chest… I've really struggled with the idea of you going to a party as some other guy's date. In fact, I've hated the fact that I'm not there to take you myself. But it comes down to this: I know you, I love you and I trust you. If you want to go to this party, I can't stop you. So, as part of me being a supportive boyfriend, as you have been a supportive girlfriend when I've gone out to parties, I say have a great night and you can tell me all about it when you see me the next day. I can't wait to see you and hold you in my arms.
K: What a lovely message to start the day off with! I can't wait to get a hold of you, either! I hope you have a great day at work, sweetheart!

"It's good to see a smile on your face," Hermione said as I climbed out of the portrait door, I put my arms around myself instinctively to keep warm, "I can't believe it's still blizzardy out there!"

"Fifth day in a row." I gave her the thumbs up and a fake smile, as we hopped down the stairs towards breakfast to keep warm, "I'll be glad to get out of the castle for an hour this afternoon, I get the impression it's not as bad in London."

Hermione sighed, "We always get the worst of the weather up here in the north of Scotland, I'd just like to go for a walk outside and not get soaked…"

The two of us sat down to a fulfilling breakfast, with Ron and Harry sitting at the opposite end of the Gryffindor table. Harry and I shared a quick but meaningful glance, one reminiscent of a Saturday morning breakfast towards the beginning of term where we challenged each other to see who could eat the most, before slipping into a food coma until lunchtime when Hermione insisted she ought to spend time in the library. That was when Ron told her to lighten up and she told him, "I'm not a lamp, Ronald!" Good times.

"I think you're in luck this morning!" Hermione pointed up at a familiar owl accompanied by another sharing the load, carrying three boxes, "I don't know about you, but I'm very excited to see what you've been sent…"

I took the boxes from the eagle owls, gaining a lot of attention from around the Great Hall as I sat with the boxes on the table in front of me. They were soaking wet with sleet, which was solved easily with a tap of my wand, but before I could lift them, Ginny approached, "Please tell me we're about to get a fashion show?"

I stood with the boxes, sending a furtive look over to the Slytherin table where Draco was sitting with Crabbe, Goyle, Theo and Blaise. Draco smiled before shaking his head, whispering something to Blaise, who immediately sat up straighter, for what reason, I probably don't want to know.

Knowing without even looking that Lavender was sucking Ron's face off, Parvati and Fay had to be nearby, so Ginny automatically went into our dorm and took a seat at the top of my bed.

"Ugh…" I sighed, "I wish Lavender Brown would put her stuff on her own bed!" I threw her hairbrush and hair scrunches at her bed, "Every day! Cracks me up! And don't get me started on how she's started stealing my makeup, but if I were to say anything, I'd be the big bad wolf!"

Hermione flumped herself on her bed, hugging one of her pillows, back to the three other beds in our dorm, "Let's have a look at this dress."

"Oh wow." I gasped after opening the box, "Oh my." I looked at the tag, "This is a Chanel Little Black Dress!"

Ginny looked at the price tag, "Merlin's beard! One thousand three hundred and forty-three pounds?! This dress costs more than my dad earns in a month."

"Seriously?" Hermione jumped off her bed, "Holy mother of all things – Kathryn!"

"Have you seen the shoes?"

The sounds that escaped our mouths were unexplainable, other than that of excited little girls let loose in a Princess' wardrobe, not knowing what to look at or try on first, "I need to borrow those."

"Thank you Auntie Cissa." I said slowly, completely blown away by her choices.