Change The Fate: The Fallen Angel Arise
By TheUndefeatable
Disclaimer: I don't own anything! Well, maybe that's a little exaggeration; I do own a toothbrush, a cup, some useless notes, and some clothes, and some other stuff, so...Ok, I don't own anything that belongs to J.K. Rowling! Yeah, that's better!
Rate: Rated T just to be safe
Summary: There is always a light in the middle of darkness, you just must be brave enough to see it and to embrace it! Then, you will see that you don't need to take the burden all by yourself; you see that you are not alone. A sequel to 'Face The World Alone: Tale Of A Fallen Angel'
Warning: Mention of child abuse and attempt suicide, some violence and bloodshed in later chapters, but not any thing explicit! Don't like it, don't read it!
A/N: Hello every one! I'm sorry it took me so long to update! I was really busy, but also I had problem with writing this chapter! The characters just didn't cooperate! Here is a rather long chapter to make up for the long wait! I hope you enjoy it!
Edited April 2019.
Chapter 7: Convention
Poppy checked everything one last time and left the curtained area. When she entered her office she found Albus sitting comfortably in a chair with a cup of tea. There was another cup of tea and a plate of biscuits on the table waiting for her. She joined him and started sipping her tea. After a minute of silence Albus asked "How is he?"
Poppy put her tea down and sighed. "He was in too much pain to be coherent so I really could not assess his mental state. I gave him a Dreamless Sleep Potion for now. I hope the next time he wakes up he will be more coherent."
"Then I'll tell Rosaline to prepare the documents and bring them over tomorrow morning," Dumbledore said.
"But Albus, what if he is not in any condition for this meeting? We still don't know what mental state he will be in when he wakes up next," Poppy said.
"I know, but we don't have much time! It would be better to be ready than risking losing time."
"Okay," Poppy conceded.
~oOo~
Severus was floating in darkness. It was different from before; that darkness was restricting, suffocating, but this one was not like that. It was gentle and welcoming. It felt soft, warm ...and safe. It was like the darkness was embracing him, protecting him, and Severus let himself relax. He let all the tension, all the pain go and just relaxed into its embrace. It felt a little like those times when his mother had embraced him, but yet it was different. When his mother hugged him, he could hear her heartbeat, he could see her love for him in her eyes, and feel it in the tightening of her arms around him. It felt natural to him. But this embrace ...it was not natural. In a way it was forced and clinical. That simple point proved to Severus that something was wrong. No one ever gave him anything good for no reason except his mother. Her hugs felt natural, but this was not natural.
Severus knew this and he knew that he should do something about it. He should stop it. He should find a way to get out of here, but he couldn't make himself actually do it. It was the only kindness, the only good thing he has received after an eternity of pain.
He knew he should find a way out, but he didn't want to. He wanted to stay. To feel safe, to feel wanted. So he stayed. He stayed for some time. He felt safe, but the wrongness of situation increased. The embrace which felt reassuring just moments ago started to feel suffocating, restricting, and instinctively Severus fought to get free. The more he fought however the more restricting it became until Severus finally broke through. It was like coming to surface after thrashing underwater for some time. His eyes opened wide and the first thing he registered was that he could breath! Merlin! There was air, fresh air. The second thing he noticed was pain, burning pain. It was everywhere …everything hurt. His eyes were blurry and he opened them in a silent scream.
~oOo~
It was well past midnight, when Madam Pomfrey checked on her patient for the last time and then went into her private chambers that was connected to her office. Even though she was tired she took her time preparing for bed. Her routine always relaxed her and helped her to sleep better. When she was ready, she went to her bedroom. She had just slipped between sheets of her bed when her wards went off, indicating that her patient had woken up. It was surprising that Severus had woken up as the Dreamless Sleep she gave him should have made him sleep until morning. She pushed the thought out of her mind and got up hurriedly. After donning a robe over her night cloth she practically ran to her office, took a pain reliever and went to Severus' bedside. Severus had his eyes shut tightly and his mouth was open, but no sound came out of it. He was sweating profusely and all his muscles were taut. Poppy sat on the bed slowly and not knowing what to do or what reaction to expect. She put her hand on Severus' shoulder and called his name.
Severus jerked at the touch, being too weak to do more than that, but didn't show any indication that he heard her. For the umpteenth times in the recent days Poppy cursed in her mind, getting frustrated. This was not in her expertise to deal with this kind damage. Broken bones, she could deal with. Wizard flu or any other illness, she could manage. Merlin, she could even heal injuries inflicted in a duel or battle. But dealing with the aftereffects of torture or the psychological effect of it was not in her expertise. She was a school healer, not a Mediwitch specialized in dealing with torture victims. All these days she spent second guessing her decisions and asking herself what if she had hurt Severus more by doing what she did. Shaking herself from her thoughts, she gently brought Severus' head up and put the uncorked vial to his lips. Severus at first resisted a little against her hold, but soon stopped and stayed limp as the cold liquid flew down his parched throat.
~oOo~
Severus swallowed with difficulty, but it was worth it. Because it was the first wet thing he had in his mouth in a while and it was cold and soothing and it flowed slowly and smoothly down his throat. So it was worth the effort and worth the difficulty.
When the liquid hit his stomach, it was heaven. Warmth spread through his inside. Then it got warmer and warmer to the point it was hot and it was burning. It was burning as it made its way up his throat again. It was burning and he didn't even have enough energy to turn his head and there was liquid still being poured into his mouth and the burning flame came up and then went down the wrong way so Severus could not even breathe.
~oOo~
Poppy should have seen this coming. She was a trained healer. She should have known, but after working years with children, fixing broken bones, healing simple illnesses, fixing a simple spell gone wrong; she had forgotten some trivial and essential parts of taking care of patients who woke up after a long coma. She should have known that after Merlin knows how long not eating, his stomach would shrink and he wouldn't be able to keep anything down. She should have given him a stomach soother first, but with everything going on her mind she simply forgot that fact.
She quickly turned Severus on his side and gently patted his back to help him to clear his air way. Then she summoned a bowl, napkin, and a stomach soother. Filling the bowl with water, she cleaned Severus' mouth and his sweating forehead before trying to coerce the unwilling teenager into swallowing the stomach soother. This time a low gurgling sound was the only indication of Severus' resistance as he didn't have any energy left.
When both the stomach soother and pain reliever were given to him, Poppy gently put his head back. She watched as tension left his body and his face relaxed. She waited several moments before calling him.
"Severus ...Severus?"
His eyelids fluttered and his eyes slowly opened. Poppy wanted to cast a Lumos charm or light one of the torches as she couldn't see very well in just the light coming from window. However when she saw even that light is too much for Severus' eyes and how he tried to shy away from it she reconsidered her decision and tried her best to assess her patient in the dim light.
"Severus, can you hear me?" The eyes that focused on her were both tired and confused.
"Can you hear me, dear?"
Severus blinked frequently as if he had difficulty focusing. There was several second of silence when Poppy could not see any sign that Severus recognized her. Just as she was concluding that there was some damage to his mind, Severus' eyes widened a bit in recognition. The recognition was soon replaced by more confusion. Severus opened his mouth to voice this confusion, but only a low groan came out of his mouth. Severus frowned and opened his mouth again to speak.
"It is okay. It is only because of disuse. Do you think you can keep some water down? Nod if you can."
Severus frowned a little like he had problem keeping up with her and he nodded once. Poppy summoned a cup. After performing the Aguamenti spell she helped Severus sip a small amount of water.
"Better?"
"Y-yes" his voice was very low and hoarse. Poppy was sure if it was not in the middle of night or the Hospital Wing was not empty she could not have heard. She smiled and asked.
"Do you know who I am?"
A small nod again. "M'm Pomf'y."
"Yes, dear. You are in Hogwarts and you are safe. Do you remember what happened?"
Severus frowned. There were several minutes of silence. After that Severus tensed which made the matron to come to the conclusion that he did remember. Severus' small nod confirmed her assumption and then Severus asked. "H-how?"
"You mean how you came to be here?" Severus nodded. "The headmaster and Professor McGonagall brought you to Hogwarts." Her answer made Severus narrow his eyes.
As her basic mental assessment was complete, instead of elaborating Poppy said, "We can speak about it tomorrow, but you have to rest now. Tomorrow the headmaster wants to speak with you and for that you need to be well rested."
She was summoning another Dreamless Sleep Potion, when she noticed the widened eyes and the near panicked state of Severus. Well as panicked as he could be considering his lethargic state.
"No" Severus said. Poppy knew that Severus didn't trust Albus and he had every right not too after all the times that Albus had unfairly taken Marauders' side in their quarrels. However, Severus' current reaction was a little extreme even considering that history.
"Severus? What it is, dear?" She asked gently.
"N …Not …so …soon …ca …can't …thi …think …c'early …m …m'mind …slow," he panted.
Poppy smiled kindly at him and said. "It is okay, Severus. The reason your mind is rather sluggish, is some of the potions coursing through your system. But now that you are awake, I'll change your potions, so it will get better. Also I'll be here tomorrow for your meeting with the headmaster so you have nothing to worry about and I can even brew you a herbal drink of brahim, vocha, and basil. It will accelerate your brain activity. How will that be?"
Severus thought for a second before nodding once and trying to catch his breath.
Poppy summoned a dreamless sleep and helped Severus to drink it. When she was sure he was asleep she tucked him in and after checking everything one last time, went to bed herself.
~oOo~
The morning could not have come sooner. To Severus it felt like a blink of an eye. He was still tired and in pain, but he needed to know what had happened. Also, there was the problem of the headmaster wanting to speak with him. Nothing good ever came from talking with the headmaster. Not for him. So, with difficulty, he opened his eyes to face the world. In a matter of minutes, Madam Pomfrey appeared next to him and gave him a series of potions. True to her word after drinking the potions Severus felt his mind was only slightly slower than usual.
Breakfast was a nightmare for Severus. Not only did he have to be spoon fed like a toddler, but also he had to wear a bib and Madam Pomfrey had to help him with swallowing with the use of a spell. It was very humiliating and all for what? Two spoonfuls of broth? It was all he could take. What was even more humiliating was the fact that he could not move even one bit and was totally exhausted and panting after swallowing two spoonfuls of broth.
Madam Pomfrey assured him that when he was a little stronger they will start the therapy and in no time Severus would be on his feet again. But what horrified Severus was that until then he would need someone to help him eat, drink, and even to use bathroom.
Severus was sure fate was having fun with him. He could not even have the dignity of seeing to his basic needs himself. When Madam Pomfrey had to 'help' him to half sit, half lie on the bed and get ready for his meeting with headmaster, Severus was ready to cry from the injustice of situation, but he refrained from doing so by sheer will. After that Madam Pomfrey helped him to sip a little of the promised herbal brew. Just when Severus wanted to ask Pomfrey about how he got to Hogwarts and what happened the doors of Hospital Wing opened.
Madam Pomfrey went to see who had come and after few minutes returned with the headmaster and a woman that Severus didn't know. Severus spent those minutes preparing his mental shield. Severus and the headmaster regarded each other for a minute before the headmaster smiled sadly and said, "Hello, Severus"
"Headmaster" Severus said stoically. He arranged his expression and tone so he gave nothing away.
"Hello, Severus. It is good to see you awake! My name is Rosaline Bones. I work in the Department of Children's Support Services of Ministry."
Severus looked at her for a minute, before nodding in response. After the adults sat down everything went silent as Severus regarded the witch and wizard sitting in front of his bed and they regarded him. After a few minutes Severus said, "Madam Pomfrey said you wanted to speak with me and she also said that you were the one who brought me here." He directed his statement at Dumbledore in a low voice.
"Yes, Professor McGonagall and myself went to your house …and brought you here"
"What were you doing there?" Severus asked his eyes narrowed.
"Well, when your professors noticed you had not attended any of your classes since the start of the term we sent an owl to your house. When we didn't receive any response and the owl didn't return Professor McGonagall and I decided to pay a visit to your home."
"Since the start of term?" Severus muttered to himself before asking "What date is it?"
The adults looked a little taken a back. None of them thought that during his stay at his home Severus had had no knowledge of the passing of time.
"It is October, third" It was Poppy who answered him. If Severus was surprised about it he didn't show it. After a minute of silence, Rosaline cleared her throat and said, "Severus, maybe you are wondering what Albus and I are doing here. Well, we are here because apparently your father has gone to authorities and asked them to find you and to return you to him as he is very concerned." She used air quotes and Severus snorted. "And he wants his son back." She finished.
"Of course he would," Severus muttered under his breath, as he stared at his feet on the bed. The statement made the three adult in the room exchange surprised looks.
Severus looked at them and said "But he cannot ask for this! I am a student and the term has already started. Students have to go home only in summers. Also I don't need to go back this summer as I am of age. I can simply stay at a friend's house"
"A friend's house?" Dumbledore asked with raised eyebrows which caused Severus to narrow his eyes.
"Yes, a friend's!" Severus snapped. "So I don't see what the problem is."
"The NEWT level of education is not mandatory. So even though it rarely happens parents can cancel their children education by signing a form. Your father has been made aware of this and he signed the cancellation form."
It was then that they saw the first emotions in Severus's face: Fear. Severus' mind was racing. His mind was racing through options. His heart was beating in his ears and he was panicking as option after option was rejected. When he ran out of ideas he noticed that his shield was down. He quickly brought it back up again and schooled his expression accordingly.
Dumbledore and Rosaline were surprised by how quickly Severus gathered himself and hid his emotions. No fifteen year-old child should be able to do that.
"So you are here to inform me that I have to go back?" Severus asked in a resigned tone.
"No, we want to help you and we are here to consider other options," Rosaline said. She has seen enough children like Severus to know that if they wanted to get the best result they needed to be honest about everything.
"What other options?" Severus asked.
"Well, if we bring up your father's treatment of you then you won't have to go back," Rosaline replied.
"But? There is a 'but' isn't there?"
Rosaline sighed and said. "Yes, the procedure for such cases includes a physical examination which you'll have to consent to."
At the mention of physical examination Severus stiffened slightly and then he said, "No"
"I know it is not easy for you, but it is the only option we have. Also if things go well, we can even put Poppy here for your physical examination." Upon hearing this Severus looked at Madam Pomfrey and she nodded back at him with a small smile.
There were several minutes of silence as Severus mulled the matter over. The others waited patiently for his response. At last Severus said quietly while looking at his blankets, "So, if I consent to this physical examination everything will be okay?" He wanted to be clear about his options. He had promised his mother to live …or he thought he did. If that was what really happened. He shook himself mentally. It didn't matter whether it was real or not. If he was really going to live then he had to make the best of it and for that he needed to know everything about this option.
"I wish it was that simple, but …" Rosaline trailed off.
"But?" Severus looked at her questioningly, but it was Dumbledore who answered him.
"The problem is that physical examination will reveal that scar as well." He motioned toward Severus' left wrist with his head and eyes.
Severus' only reaction was to turn his hand so no one could see the white scar on his wrist. How it was possible that every hard subject for him came up in a ten minutes talk, he had no idea. Dumbledore continued without acknowledging Severus' reaction.
"And Ministry is very strict in regards to suicide –" Severus winced slightly at the word. "They usually insist on admitting these people to an asylum like St. Mungo's mental ward"
Severus' eyes widened and his breath hitched. He had heard horrible stories about that place from his housemates. About how nurses filled patients with sleeping and other potions so they didn't have to bother with feeding, taking care of their needs, or guarding them so the patients wouldn't escape. He also had heard that they treat the patients like they would a bag of potatoes; tossing them here or there. Severus shook himself out of his thoughts and asked Rosaline. "Am I right to presume that you have a solution for that as well?"
Rosaline nodded and said "Yes, we …" she motioned to herself, Dumbledore, and Pomfrey. "thought it would be best if we bring up abuse and suicide case together" Severus winced unnoticeably at hearing 'abuse' and 'suicide'.
"And how does it help?"
"Well, usually it doesn't, but if you were to grant your guardianship to someone influential then it makes both cases rather easy."
"Isn't it rather ironic that someone who works for the Ministry is the one suggesting going around the law? As an employee of the Ministry shouldn't you uphold law?" Severus said haughtily.
"Yes, but that works when the written law helps people not to make them more miserable! Yes, I am suggesting we go around the law, but it is to help you."
"Why are you so interested in helping me?"
"It is my job to do so, Severus!" Rosaline said. Truth be told, she was getting a little frustrated. When Dumbledore told her that Severus was a difficult boy to deal with she didn't believe him.
"So it is to uphold the law,...and you are doing a wonderful job at that!" Severus said sarcastically.
"Severus—" Both Dumbledore and Poppy started to scold him, but Rosaline cut them off.
"No, he is right to question that." She sighed starring at the floor for one minute, before raising her head and looking Severus in the eye and said calmly.
"I'm doing this because I wanted to do so since I was child. I graduated from Hogwarts with all O's and E's. I could have gotten in any profession I wanted, but I chose this. Do you know why?"
Severus shook his head slowly. He still seem to have a problem believing her.
"It's because I lost a childhood friend to abuse. I know she was getting abused but I didn't say anything. We played with each other every day. One day she went home after our game and never returned! Her family was a famous pureblood family. The official story was that she fell down the stairs and broke her neck, but I knew the truth. When I was standing in front of her grave, I vowed to myself to do my best to not let other children suffer the same fate. That's why I chose this job and while I didn't win every case I had; haven't saved all those children; I did do all I could to help them. That's exactly what I want to do now; to help you."
"If I accept this option will I be able to skip being confined in a mental asylum?" He asked without commenting about Rosaline's answer.
"Well, no. At the very least you'll have an observation period. The observation period is when your health and magic will be monitored so you don't hurt yourself or others. It will be nothing big. You just have to wear two magical bracelet and they won't even be visible to others. Also, there is a confinement period, but it will not be a problem either as it will take some time for you to get back on your feet. And you can even spend it here."
"They will let me stay in Hogwarts?"
"Well, yes, considering that your guardian is the headmaster of the school."
"What?" Severus asked rather harshly.
"Oh, I forgot to mention the most important part. We thought it would be best if Professor Dumbledore becomes your guardian. He has a lot of influence in Ministry and as headmaster —" Rosaline said before being cut off.
"No." Severus said firmly.
"I'm sorry?" Rosaline asked.
"No! I'm not going to give my guardianship to him!"
"But Severus —" Rosaline started to say before Severus cut her off again.
"No! You say you want to help me and I believe you! You are trying to show me alternatives, I understand. But I don't see how this will be any better than other outcomes!"
"Now, Severus, we are trying to help you." Dumbledore started to explain. "I know we've had our differences in the past –" Severus snorted. "But this is about your welfare and you need to be reasonable about it"
"Welfare? You speak as if you care!"
"Of course I do, Severus! I –"
"Isn't it funny that about four months ago you didn't care whether I lived or died? Now you say you care about my welfare? You know Headmaster, I'm really curious to know what brought this sudden change." Severus said acidly.
And suddenly Dumbledore found himself facing the Slytherin who he thought would be among the first ones who joins Voldemort. It was always hard for him to imagine Severus any other way when Severus behaved like this. 'but now it would be different' he thought with himself. However, to be honest with himself, he was surprised at Severus' reaction. He knew he should not have been surprised by Severus' behavior, considering his treatment of the boy these past five years, his lack of interest in his home life, and his negligence of his situation at school. But he was. The fact that Severus was objecting to his guardianship was no surprise. In fact, Dumbledore had expected a confrontation like that. However, the vehemence in which Severus spoke took him by surprise.
Before he could think of anything to say to assuage the situation, Rosaline said, "Look Severus, I know about yours and Headmaster's disagreements —"
Severus snorted and said, "No, you don't anything about the disagreement," he air quoted with his barely raised hands. "between me and headmaster."
Rosaline sighed and said. "Okay, I don't know about it, but this is about your future and so far this is the only option that we have."
"No" Severus said firmly. "There are other people who can become my guardian."
"Yes, there might be others willing to do that, but none of them are influential enough to be able to help you."
"You are wrong. There are influential people. I am personally aware of the interest of a certain Mr. Malfoy in taking my guardianship. I'm sure there are others, as well." The three adults shared incredulous looks.
"Are you saying that you want Mr. Malfoy to become your guardian?" Rosaline asked.
Severus shrugged and said, "Well, I may as well do so, considering that the two options I currently have don't seem all that different. At least Lucius treated me well, when he was at school."
It was a complete bluff on his part. Severus had no intention of giving Malfoy smallest power over him, let alone granting him his guardianship. Severus had seen how Lucius Malfoy treated people who he didn't have much power over them. He was not stupid. He knew if he give Malfoy any power over him, then his situation will be even worse than how it was with his father; practically he will become a slave to him with promise of regular punishment. A level of pain and injury that his father could not inflect in a million years. However, he didn't think his situation would be much different with Dumbledore. So he was ready to take a risk. If the woman in front of him was really honest about helping him then this response would prompt her to come up with a better option. Or at least that was what he hoped would happen.
His line of thoughts was cut off by Dumbledore who seemed to have just woken up from Severus' response regarding Malfoy's interest.
"How did you come to know of this? Who told you about Mr. Malfoys interest?"
"Lucius, himself. He even had all the papers ready. They just needed my signature."
"When did he speak with you?" Dumbledore pressed on.
"Once at the beginning of summer at King's Cross and once in the middle of summer at Spinner's End."
"You mean he knew about how your father treated you and did nothing?" Rosaline asked outraged.
"Did nothing? I bet he paid my father to keep me like that after I turned him down at King's Cross. Definitely would explain why my father is so concerned for me and wants me back."
There was a moment of silence before Poppy said in a subdued voice, "Based on what we know, Mr. Malfoy didn't pay your father anything, but he informed your father that as your guardian he has access to your vault and since then your father has requested he should receive a large sum of money for taking care of you."
"My vault? But I don't have a vault!" Severus said confused.
"Severus, your grandfather only disowned your mother, and not any child she may have had. As of two years ago when your grandfather passed away; you have become the sole heir of Prince fortune," Rosaline explained patiently. "And this is what Mr. Malfoy shared with your father. Your father has been stealing from your inheritance!"
They expected a reaction showing anger, hurt, or sadness from Severus, but they were surprised in the next moment as Severus chuckled humorlessly.
"Severus?" Pomfrey asked tentatively.
"Of course, he would not waste the money of the noble house of Malfoy for getting me to agree! He used my own money to torture me and make me consent to his guardianship!"
"And yet you are saying that you want to give him your guardianship? After all he has done?" Dumbledore asked sharply.
"That's not what I said! But even so did you really expect me to grant my guardianship to you? After all you have done? Or not done?" Severus ended in a mocking tone.
"Just because I punished you several times for the trouble you have gotten ..."
Rosaline took one moment to process what she had heard so far. From all she had heard two things were certain: one, persuading Severus would not be an easy task and two, it would be impossible with Severus and Dumbledore in the same room. She had to admit that the quarrel between them was much bigger than the simple misunderstanding Dumbledore had made it out to be. It is a problem that needed to be addressed, but later. Now they had more urgent matters on their hands. With this thought in mind she cleared her throat to get their attention. When that failed she drew her wand and shot off some sparks. That got their attention and she said formally, "Headmaster, would you mind leaving us for a minute. I want to speak with Severus alone. Madam, if you would please leave too," She said motioning to Poppy.
"We will be waiting in headmaster's office." Pomfrey said firmly and a moment later both she and Dumbledore were gone. There was a minute of silence and Rosaline mulled over how to say what she wanted.
"Can I ask you something?" She asked at last. After seeing Severus' nod she continued. "Why didn't you grant Mr. Malfoy your guardianship?"
"I'm not stupid. I have seen how people with power over me usually treat me. I'm not going to give one more person that kind of power." Severus said bitterly.
Rosaline nodded and said "I understand. That's why we are saying it would be best that Mr. Dumbledore become your guardian. We want to help, Severus, but for that you have to let us help you."
"I know you want to help and that's why I am saying no. I will say yes and I'll let you help me when you give me a good option! Well, as good as possible!"
"You really believe that Mr. Dumbledore's guardianship is not much different from Mr. Malfoy, don't you?" Severus nodded once in answer.
"Why?" Rosaline asked.
"Why he has become so interested in helping me all of a sudden if he's not going to use me? Just like others do."
"Don't you think if he wanted to use you he would have done so before?"
"No, because 'before' he had no way of getting his hands on me. Now the opportunity has presented itself and he is taking it."
"Actually it was me who suggested that it would be good idea for him to become your guardian."
"Let me guess, because he is the Chief Warlock in the Wizengamot and has influence in the Ministry." Rosaline nodded. Severus continued, "What do you think would have happened if you hadn't suggested it? He would have suggested it himself, saying that as he has great influence and he could help me the most, he was the best option."
Rosaline acknowledged the possibility and studied the boy in front of her. After a few moments she asked, "Don't you think that there is a small chance that he is genuine?"
"No," Severus answered shortly.
"Why?" Rosaline asked.
"He has shown in the past that he doesn't care about my life."
"Does this have something to do with what you said about the end of last year?"
"Yes and no. Yes he showed that he doesn't care about my life, but it wasn't the first time. It has happened on so many occasions in the past. It was just the final straw."
"What happened? At the end of last year I mean."
"It was nothing. Just a disagreement between me and headmaster about the difference between attempted murder and harmless prank." Severus said sarcastically.
"Murder?"
"I can't tell you more than that. If you are really interested then you should ask Dumbledore about it!"
Rosaline put that thought away to ask Dumbledore later and to tried to come back to the matter at hand.
"Severus, I understand the situation you are in, but—" Before she could say more Severus cut her off.
"Do you?"
"Well no, not really! But I know one thing and it is that the other alternatives are unthinkable."
"So you think I should condemn myself to two years of hell because alternatives are worse?"
"Well, to be realistic, when it come to a choice between bad and worse I think that it is logical to choose bad, but …" She said it emphatically. "I don't think that this option is bad. Even though it might look that way to you! To me it looks like a negotiable option. An option which I think we should explore its limitations before putting it aside." She looked at Severus and at his nod she continued, "If you are worried about Mr. Dumbledore mistreating you then we can cast monitoring charms that track his treatment of you so he doesn't hurt you physically, or even magically."
"Can it also stop him from making my life hell?"
"Or we can ask him to give a Wizarding oath to not abuse his power over you."
"It is of no use. The wordings are too general for a Wizarding oath. Also, there are ways around it as it depends too much on the interpretation and beliefs of the oath taker."
Rosaline smiled gently and said, "You are very smart"
'I had to be to live this long' Severus thought, but said nothing.
There was a minute of silence where Rosaline was thinking about alternatives. "What about an unbreakable vow?" She asked at last. "It doesn't need specific wordings and it doesn't depend on the interpretation of anyone, but on the judgment of the vow itself." She tried to say it casually, but inside she wanted to scream. What has happened in this school that a student needs the reassurance of an unbreakable vow for granting the headmaster of the school permission to protect him and take care of him? It was something that the headmaster is duty-bound to do for every student.
Severus was silent as he mulled over the idea before saying. "He would not do it."
"I'll speak to him and we will see. If he is genuine in his desire to help, then he should not have any objection to it and he will accept the request. Now the question is if he agrees to it then would you accept him as your guardian?"
Severus' mind started to race. He could feel that the effects of herbal brew was vanishing slowly and he was starting to feel exhausted and sleepy. He tried to push it aside as he needed to think clearly for this.
He was almost sure that Dumbledore would not accept his condition, but if he did, was Severus ready to grant him that much power over him? A part of him rebelled at the thought. He knew the condition his body was in and the last thing he needed was for Dumbledore to see him at his weakest where he was totally dependent on him for doing even smallest thing. He didn't want to undergo that kind of humiliation. He didn't want to see Dumbledore laughing at how pathetic he was or even worse for him to tell his favorite Gryffindors, the Marauders about it. The humiliation he endured at their hands so far would be nothing compared to what he would have to endure then. The Marauders would have a field day with that kind of information. All those thoughts made him want to answer negatively to the question, but another part of him stopped it. It was the realistic part, the part that knew that he didn't have any other choice; that it was the best he could get. With Lucius or others he wouldn't have the reassurance of the vow.
Severus stayed silent for several minutes, his thoughts raging a battle against each other. In the end the logical part of his mind won. Severus looked at Rosaline and said "Yes." After saying that simple word, Severus sank deeply into the mattress as if he could not fight anymore and had given up.
Rosaline nodded. That only left speaking with Dumbledore. It was only then that she noticed how exhausted and spent Severus looked and she felt great respect and admiration towards the teenager in front of her. A boy who didn't let the world break him; a child who had had almost all the bones in his body broken, but still fought for himself. A young man, for that's what he was, who bent, but never broke; who kept his spirit; a fighter.
She got up, went beside the bed, put a hand on Severus' shoulder, and said, "Take a rest, Severus. I'll talk to headmaster and if he accepts your condition then we will come back here. Then you will sign the guardianship forms and we'll bind you and the headmaster in the vow. However, for now try to get some sleep."
She patted Severus' shoulder and with that she left the teenager and went to Headmaster's Office.
TBC….
A/N: The herbs I mentioned here are real and they really increase brain activity. Here are some of their benefits which I found on Internet:
Brahim: Helps the left and right sides of brain to work together. Improves capacity for attention and focus. Improves the ability to withstand emotional stress. Reduction in nervousness and anxiety. Improves immune system functioning.
Vocha: The word vocha means 'speech'. This herb promotes concentration, clarity, and speech. It has stimulating effects which means it treats depression and mental sluggishness. Promotes mental clarity and a strong memory; at the same time it detoxifies brain tissue.
Basil: Improves mental fatigues and focus.