Rumble in the Jungle
I don't own anything except my Oc's: All content goes to their proper owners
With the deep sigh of an old man who had been through way too much, Oda looked at the board in front of him. He finished up some drawings on it, vague lines, and drawings to represent people and factions.
"Alright people, listen up. And I want no back chatter out of you two genin. This is serious." Oda said, pointing to Sasuke and Naruto.
"You spent an hour drawing on that board muttering to yourself like a madman. How else am I supposed to stay awake?" Naruto asked, rubbing his left eye with his sleeve.
"Just because you have the attention span of a seagull doesn't mean the rest of us do, loser." Sasuke replied with a smirk.
"The only bird in this house that's going to get affected is your skinny, goose neck!" Naruto growled, ready to strangle the emo beside him.
However, before the two could start anything, Sakura smacked them in the back of the head before pushing them apart. "Alright, that's enough! Focus, boys!" Sakura snapped out authoritatively.
"Thank you, Sakura dear." Oda answered before grabbing a pointer stick.
Sakura blushed ever so slightly and smiled. "You're welcome, Oda-san." She replied sweetly, much to the annoyance of Naruto and Sasuke as they rubbed the backs of their heads.
"Teacher's pet…" The two boys muttered.
"At least she actually understands the concept of proper manners and respect. If you two don't get your act together, you two mutts are going to be put in the doghouse. And I do mean that in the singular context." Oda sternly warned, trying to drive home a point.
The threat seemed to work as the boys hushed up and listened. Whether they liked it or not.
"Alright. Since our two interests have aligned, that means we are in war coordination with each other. And I do mean war. While what we have against us might seem disjointed and disparate, rest assured, we are in an uphill battle if we plan on getting out of this alive." Oda explained, walking to stage left of the board.
"You do mean alive and in one piece, right?" Naruto asked.
"Did I say that?" Oda asked back.
"No…" Naruto nervously answered.
"Then that's what I meant." Oda said in a sharp tone.
"Worry not, Naruto. I'm sure we'll come out of this intact… mostly… maybe…" Kakashi told his blonde student.
"We're all gonna die…" Naruto muttered and gulped.
"Probably. But death comes for everyone sooner or later. You'll probably be first." Sasuke said, agreeing with his blonde teammate.
"Says the guy who tripped coming out of the bathroom earlier…" Naruto muttered.
"Boys…!" Sakura growled out threateningly.
"Shutting up." Naruto and Sasuke said in unison.
"Well you all know about Gatō, and the fact he has an army of former shinobi and Yakuza goons at his beck and call. However, being allied with a Strigoi Dynasty, I question what he is offering them though, makes this threat all the worse." Oda continued, pointing to various vague representations of them on the board.
"So, what's your super amazing plan for dealing with this, Oda-san?" Tazuna asked somewhat hopefully.
"After wracking my brain, performing meditation, and beating a stray cyclist, I have been able to come up with a reliable, if not fully fool proof plan." Oda answered.
"This is either going to be amazing or suck…" Sasuke muttered, earning him a wordless smack to the back of the head from Sakura.
"It will likely be both, depending on which part of the plan you get put on. And at the rate you two are going…" Oda trailed off, referring clearly enough to the two male genin that even they could get it.
"Shut up before you get us both killed, Chicken Ass…!" Naruto muttered angrily, earning himself a wordless smack to the back of his own head.
"I can immediately tell you that the Strigoi component of this will have to be for the moment contained until I can figure out any discernible fault lines we can hit. The last time I tried to attack a vampire dynasty head on, it got me chained up with several female vampires in a scenario that I will not explain in the presence of children." Oda explained.
As soon as the others heard this, Tsunami covered Inari's ears, much to the ire of her son, as Tazuna had a look of surprise. Meanwhile, Sakura blushed, Sasuke merely raised an eyebrow, and Naruto just looked confused. All while Kakashi, being the man of culture that he is, nodded in approval.
"So, the most likely route is to take out Gato and his forces. His enforcers should be an easy first target. Likely also, due to his mercantile background, I should be able to have a conversation with the man himself, and at bare minimum get him to back out of our affairs. That way, considering he's the one paying, will keep this Zabuza fellow off our backs." Oda explained further.
"One problem. The little midget is also a crime boss. I doubt he'll listen to you." Tazuna replied, much less hopefully this time.
"As a King, you have to deal with all types. Believe it or not, the first ever King of Seaheart was a merchant. Since then, we have followed in his august footsteps by being kings of mercantilism and trade. He might be a crime boss, true, but he's a shipping magnate first. If he can make money legitimately, and I explained how your bridge can provide him that business, then I think he will change his tune." Oda said, addressing the bridge builder directly.
"Okay. We're trusting you on this…" Tazuna replied warily.
"Once they are dealt with, then we can deal with the undead hordes presented with us. And considering what happened yesterday on the bridge, then I think you have a basic idea of the challenges that will bring us." Oda said, now addressing the shinobi.
"You'd have to be a hell of a lot dumber than even Naruto to not understand that much…" Sasuke muttered.
"I nominate Sasuke as Terrorgheist bait." Naruto said, raising his hand.
"Sakura?" Kakashi asked as his female student nodded and slapped them both upside the backs of their heads.
"Do be careful with that, Sakura. I wouldn't want you to break your hands upon their heads this early into our mission." Oda said.
"Don't worry, Oda-san. I've toughened up my hands with plenty of practice." Sakura replied sweetly.
"I have complete confidence that you have." Oda answered with a nod.
"Now how are we going to deal with the Strigoi, Oda-san?" Kakashi asked.
"First, we need to evaluate their strength. Dynasties can vary massively in their numbers and force composition. Considering that they were able to casually bring a Terrorgheist to a minor engagement, that does not point to them being on the small side." Oda answered somberly.
"Which doesn't bode well in the slightest for us…" Kakashi added grimly.
"I think I might know the answer, but I have to ask regardless. What do your hinterlands patrol protocols look like?" Oda asked.
"We don't… have any here. We weren't expecting to deal with a threat like this…" Kakashi replied as the situation began to sink in.
"Tazuna, what have the patrols around these parts been historically like?" Oda asked.
"Our village has no militia or shinobi. We don't have any…" Tazuna told him sadly.
"Oh no…" Oda muttered.
"We could send Naruto's Shadow Clones to scout things out. They could get us the information we need." Kakashi pointed out.
"Good idea. But how are we supposed to get the information back if they get jumped by ghouls?" Naruto asked.
Kakashi raised an eyebrow at this. "You figured out a Jōnin level jutsu in the form of the Shadow Clone Jutsu within the span of a couple of hours, yet you don't know that they send back information and experiences upon being dispelled?" He asked in confusion.
"So that's what that boring lump of text under the instructions was." Naruto said, finally realizing his mistake.
"We're all gonna fucking die…" Sasuke bemoaned, despairing over the fact that this was his teammate. This was the person he had to stand side by side with and potentially fight to the death alongside.
"So, we're up against a Jōnin mercenary ninja with a sword twice as long as the three of us are tall and a dynasty of vampires with access to undead bats the size of dragons…. Not how I expected our first proper mission to go, honestly…" Sakura sighed in despair.
"Those are some bad odds. For them." Naruto said with a complete lack of understanding of the mood.
"I reiterate… we are going to fucking die…" Sasuke sighed.
"Look at the bright side. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." Kakashi replied, trying to be upbeat.
"Okay, morale has hit bedrock. Another factor to consider." Oda mused, adding that to the board.
'At least we can get an idea of what we're up against thanks to Shadow Clones. Naruto?" Kakashi said, looking at his blonde student.
"Do I gotta?" Naruto moaned.
"Yes!" His teammates replied impatiently.
"Fine…" Naruto groaned and headed out back to have the space to work.
"Sakura, Tsunami. Make sure he gets regular refreshments to keep his energy up. We need all the information we can get. Sasuke, since you seem like a bright lad and understand Naruto on a base level, you can compile the information." Oda ordered.
"Understanding Naruto on a base level is not something I'm proud of…" Sasuke replied grimly before going to find something to write down and compile the information on.
"Tazuna my good sir, where do Gato's men congregate the most?" Oda asked.
"The Broken Kunai bar, if I remember right." Tazuna replied.
"Riveting name." Oda muttered at the mention of such a crude name.
"You're planning on using them to find out Gatō's location out of them and draw him out for negotiations, aren't you?" Kakashi inquired.
"One part. Any more information that might be useful is always helpful and giving them enough physical encouragement should mean they will skip town. Regardless of how good their less than physically impressive employer is." Oda answered, sensing Kakashi's smirk through his mask.
"Mind if I tag along? I could use an opportunity to blow off some steam after what happened on the bridge." Kakashi requested, his smirk almost able to be heard in his voice.
"My only condition is that you refrain from killing. The last thing we need is to turn the place into a charnel house and attract every ghoul likely lurking in the sewers." Oda answered.
Kakashi shrugged at that. "Fair enough." He replied.
"Aww! I miss out on all the fun!" Naruto yelled from out back.
"You're too young to drink, Naruto! They'd never let you in! Now less talking, more Shadow Cloning!" Sakura yelled back from the kitchen.
After grumbling could be heard from the blonde equivalent of shinobi radar, the two veterans were off. It didn't take them terribly long to find it, as the neon lights and signs on the place practically advertised it to the world. The most prominent of those lights was a kunai in the process of breaking, and the fitting, if crude, name directly under it. Getting closer they heard the raucous and chaotic dealings going on in there.
"It sounds like a party is going on in there. What do you say we crash it, Oda-san?" Kakashi inquired with a smirk under his mask.
"Normally I'm not one to trash another man's festivities. But considering the bullshit that this village has already put me through, I'll make an exception." Oda answered, cracking his neck.
If there was any space left in the place when they opened the door, then the two observant warriors couldn't see it. Granted Kakashi only had one eye to work with, but let's not fault a guy for poor life choices. Every single enforcer, scoundrel and piece of scum in the village packed themselves in there for fun, booze, and gambling of every kind of legality. However, as soon as one of them looked at who walked in the door, it all stopped.
"Oh, don't stop on our account. We're here to join in on the fun." Kakashi told them in a bemused tone.
"It's the cyclops! Smash him!" One in the back yelled.
"How are you so popular with your dour personality?" Oda asked, looking at the cyclops in question.
"It is my gift. It is my curse." Kakashi replied mysteriously.
With a roar, the crowd of thugs, scum, and villainy descended upon our two warriors. With a look to each other, the two nodded before standing back-to-back, dropping into stances of readiness. When the first scoundrel rushed up to try to punch Kakashi, the silver haired cyclops caught his fist and pulled him into a punch to the gut, making him cough up. He then swung him towards Oda who brought his knee up into the man's face, breaking his nose and knocking him out.
When the next two came up, Kakashi ducked as Oda hit the two with a mawashi giri roundhouse kick that sent them flying into a crowd of their compatriots, bowling them over like bowling pins. This was followed up by Kakashi using a flying kick that would make a certain green spandex wearing jōnin cry tears of pride, followed swiftly by wishing he could have joined, to knock over one that tried to attack Oda from a blind spot.
"I'm not going to lie, I thought they'd put up a bit more of a fight." Oda said, sumai throwing a man who tried to punch him face first into his friend next to a serving girl.
"Well, they are simply hired thugs, not shinobi or warriors." Kakashi replied, raising his fist to hit one that was going to attack him from behind in the face without looking at him, making the thug fall over unconscious.
"Never underestimate any opponent. You will be surprised what even those who aren't warriors are capable of." Oda warned, dodging a chair being thrown at him.
"I meant no disrespect, Oda-san." Kakashi replied, grabbing the chair out of midair and smashing it into two other thugs, breaking it and knocking them out while leaving Kakashi with the broken legs to use as makeshift billy clubs.
"It's quite alright, dear boy. Just be careful with the serving girls." Oda said with a nod.
"Fair enough. I'll make sure to not hit them." Kakashi responded, hitting two thugs in the knees with his makeshift escrima sticks before smacking them across the faces to knock them out, leaving cuts on their faces from the broken ends.
Throwing his makeshift billy clubs at the faces of two more thugs to knock them out before they could attack Oda from behind, Kakashi spin kicked one thug into a crowd. Blocking and deflecting a punch with one hand, Kakashi then one inch punched another thug into a compatriot, knocking them both out. Unleashing a right cross into a thug who came at Kakashi from his one-eyed blind spot, Oda sent the scoundrel spinning into a crowd and knocking them over. Moving together, the two warriors snap kicked two goons running at them into a crowd, smashing them, crowd, and all, into the nearest wall.
Smashing his elbow into the chin of another grunt, Oda grabbed him, picked him up, and piledrives him into a crowd. Kakashi then reached his hand out for Oda to grab as Oda took his hand and swung him, allowing Kakashi to kick two incoming thugs over and knock them out. Putting their arms out, the two warriors close lined two more thugs as they ran past them, knocking them out. As one thug rushed up to Oda with his hand cocked back for a sloppy haymaker, Oda caught his fist, gripped it tight, and forced his arm behind his back before pinning him down onto the bar.
"Is there anything you'd like to let slip out, so I have a reason to be more merciful?" Oda asked the thug.
"Go to hell, you tall, red headed bastard…!" The thug spat out in response, crying out in pain as Oda twisted his arm.
"Do I look like a shinobi to you? Because unlike them, I'm trying to minimize the loss of life. YOUR lives. It's the only reason you all aren't dead right now. You think silver haired reaper over there in his edge band look would be merciful to you?" Oda asked the thug.
"I'm not telling you shit! Do you realize what Gatō will do to me if I say anything…?!" The thug tried to say, only cry out again as Oda pulled more tightly on his arm.
"Do you realize what I will do to you if you don't give me something juicy right now? Because your arm breaking in 5 places will be the least of your concerns." Oda said sternly, looking down at him with an unyielding, stern gaze only a king could issue.
"Okay, okay, okay! Gatō's working with a guy named Targos! Real nasty piece of work with fangs and a fucked-up face! That's all I know!" The thug frantically replied.
"Targos? Targos with fangs… Oh son of a bitch, that worm somehow lived." Oda muttered to himself, before sending the thug through the hardwood bar as if it were cardboard, "Kakashi, we have a fucking problem!"
"Define problem!" Kakashi replied, holding up five guys who tried to dogpile on him.
"Does a two-thousand-year-old vampire with more than likely an ax to grind against me count?" Oda asked.
"What!?" Kakashi called out, throwing the goons off into a crowd coming right at the duo.
"Targos! He's a vampire that a year before I was put in stasis I failed to kill! I thought he died, but I couldn't confirm it! If any of the vampires in the area is likely the founder of the dynasty, it's likely him!" Oda yelled, slamming a larger thug through a table face first.
"Great! Just what we needed right now!" Kakashi replied, kicking another man into and through a wall.
"Let's finish this quickly! We need to make sure our scouting efforts haven't kicked the whole damn lot of them into a frenzy!" Oda yelled sternly, taking a step to his left, letting a thug charge face first into the nearby wall.
"Right!" Kakashi yelled back, grabbing a man by the face and slamming him headfirst through a table.
Finally, with one large thug left, the two made their move. As the hulking scoundrel tried to charge at them, Oda nailed him with an elbow to the chin as Kakashi kicked his knee out from under him. Grabbing him, Oda lifted him up and piledrives him into the ground as Kakashi followed up with an ax kick to the face, knocking the big goon out.
"Terribly sorry for the mess." Oda said to the serving girls cowering behind the bar and throwing them a bag of gold coins. "For the trouble we caused you."
As he did this, one of them tried to get up with a knife in hand to stab Oda from behind in the leg. However, Kakashi took a bottle off of the bar and swung it over the scum's head, breaking it and knocking him out.
"Was that really necessary?" Oda asked.
"You're welcome." Kakashi simply replied.
"Last time I had a confrontation in a bar this bad, it was the serving girls getting this pissed at me. At least they, I could pleasure under the table and leave peacefully." Oda said with a sigh.
"Let's just get back and tell the others what we've found out." The cycloptic Konoha shinobi responded.
"Indeed. As much as I would not like to have to think about how many times I've had to get out of a bar by performing explicit acts with the wait staff, we do need to let them know a grudge happy vampire is after us." Oda agreed and the two began to walk back.
As the two made their way back, Oda's senses began picking up something. It was faint, but it felt… familiar. It wasn't quite Seaheart magic, but it was close. Looking out of the corner of his eye, he saw on a rooftop another shinobi watching them.
"We are being watched, my optically challenged friend." Oda whispered.
"You noticed too? Good. I thought it was just my imagination." Kakashi whispered back.
"I think I might know who that shinobi works for. I sense magic coming off him. Familiar magic." Oda whispered.
"Do you want me to head back while you check this out?" Kakashi asked in a hushed tone.
"Please do. The last thing we need is Naruto pissing off another Terrorgheist in our absence. Make a shadow clone of me so they don't notice my movement. If my hunch is correct, we are in absolutely no danger." Oda explained softly.
Nodding, Kakashi subtly did as Oda requested just as the king of Seaheart made his move faster than the mysterious shinobi could see. As the shinobi kept their eyes on Kakashi and "Oda", Oda crouched behind them.
"What are we on the hunt for this time? A Yōkai? Rogue Oni? Oh, please tell me it's an Oni. Haven't got to face one of those in years." Oda whispered into the shinobi's ear.
The shinobi jumped and hopped back, scrambling to his feet. "H-How did you know I was here?!" The shinobi asked as quietly as he could.
"Your skills as a shinobi are quite impressive, but your control over the magic in your blood little brother? Not so much." Oda answered, standing up to his full height from the crouch.
Getting a good look at the tall red headed man, the shinobi had a look of shock on his face. "O-Oda-sama…? The King of Seaheart…?" The ninja asked in disbelief.
"Finally, someone around here knows proper honorifics. Now then, what's an underdeveloped god killer like you doing out here?" Oda asked.
Kneeling before Oda, the shinobi bowed his head. "Forgive me, Oda-sama. My superiors have been tracking a Strigoi dynasty that we've believed to be Targos' for some time. We believed that they had taken up refuge here and I was sent in to investigate. It appears, based on what you heard in the bar, that that theory has been proven." The ninja replied respectfully.
"Using the chaos in there to get close and observe us. Clever." Oda complimented.
"If you wish, I can send word back to my superiors and have aid sent here before you make your move on them." The young shinobi offered.
"That will not be necessary. I've always known the time of the Kamishini clan is precious, and the fact that you were merely tracking Targos instead of dealing with him indicates to me that things have only become more embattled since our stasis." Oda answered politely.
"We have been trying to lock down their location before sending forces in to quietly deal with them. After all, no need to frighten the civilians and normal shinobi with knowledge of the true horrors of this world." The ninja replied.
"Yesterday a Strigoi with a pack of ghouls and a Terrorgheist attacked the bridge. Dealing with this situation quietly is no longer possible I'm afraid. I've had to educate my new allies about the vampires, if we have any hope of victory this day." Oda explained.
The shinobi flinched at that. "Then we were too late. Unfortunately, this means that we may need to finally come out of the shadows…" He replied sadly.
"Return to your leader with news that Seaheart has finally been freed from our stasis, and the Targos situation is being handled by me personally. Also, in a bit less hectic times, I wish to host your clan leadership to coordinate and catch up on things. Who's taken over after Lord Moto?" Oda explained, before asking the young shinobi.
"Unfortunately, Moto-sama's successor has been dead for many generations. At this point in time, Seishin-sama is the current head and is training up a potential successor should anything happen to him." The young ninja replied.
"I'll miss the old stubborn, reckless, and wrathful bastard. Even if he broke my jaw one time more than I'd prefer." Oda mused longingly.
"I will report back to Seishin-sama and his father Kodai-sama about this, Oda-sama. Please be careful. Also… welcome back." The shinobi humbly said.
"Thank you greatly, little brother. It gives me great joy that you all have been able to keep up the good fight and survive. My only regret is cruel fate preventing us from being with you on that journey." Oda answered, putting a hand on the young shinobi's shoulder.
"You honor us, Oda-sama…" The young ninja replied tearfully.
"Though our bloodlines have drifted greatly apart, we are still kin. Family should never have to be honored to receive the respect they deserve. And for everything your clan has had to suffer throughout over the years, words cannot command the respect I have for your clan's continuous efforts." Oda said, giving the young shinobi a warm, almost fatherly smile.
Wiping away his tears, the young shinobi nodded before standing up and bowing. Rising back to his full height, the young shinobi disappeared in a burst of speed.
"Little short to be a Kamishini, but I'll worry about their potential degradation later. Right now, I have a storm of hatred to weather." Oda said to himself, before turning to look out at the rising moon, wondering what his old "friend" had in store for him.
Before I continue, I need to make it clear that sheer number of nicknames given to Kakashi is out of love, not some form of hatred. Both of us love the one-eyed man of culture to bits and would never do him any serious harm. Aside from that, this chapter again was a lot longer than I expected. Starting to be a running theme that's me glad I chose this as a side project. Anyways, a word from my co-writer.
Uzumaki Ricky- Salutations, true shinobi fanatics! We're back again! Sorry if this took a little longer than expected. My family and I all caught Covid, so I've been sick and having to pick up the slack around the house. Hopefully, this won't delay the next chapter of Shy Fox Chronicles. Wish us luck!
Luck we will require, as the next chapter of this story dips its toes back into the vague realms of canon. But be warned, just cause the stage is set like the canon arc, doesn't mean what goes down on that bridge again will be the same. See you next time in chapter 6, "Round two on the bridge"