Gamer4 in. As one of the estimated three people on planet earth to not yet have downloaded Pokemon Go, I have enough time left over to come in and type up a quick breather chapter! Hope you guys enjoy!

Disclaimer: Did you write the book of love, and do you have faith in God above? If the Bible tells you so? Do you believe in rock and roll? Could music save your mortal soul, and can you teach me how to dance real slow?

Random Quicky

Trial by Lightning

Kumatora was... nervous.

It wasn't an easy thing to admit, not even to herself, let alone to any other person in the Smash Mansion, but it was certainly a fact.

While she certainly never thought of herself as submissive- not even close- neither did she typically think of herself as a leader. It had always been Captain Falcon who drew up the plays and directed the team around the field- now that she was facing the prospect of drawing up those plays herself, there was a knot forming in her stomach at the prospect. It would have been bad enough if it was just all the old faces, but the fact that there would inevitably be two, maybe more new faces on the team this year... she didn't like to think about it.

"Hey, Kuma!" came a call from outside the bathroom. "You ready to go?"

She looked up into the mirror. What was it Captain Falcon had said? 'The only time you can look afraid is when it's all over.' When she'd first heard the phrase, a scared little second year attempting to join the team, it hadn't made any sense. 'But... when it's all over, there's nothing to be afraid of.' To which Captain Falcon had responded... 'Exactly.'

Clearing her throat, she splashed a bit of water on her face. "I'm fine... just fine," she muttered. Out loud, she called back- "Yeah, I'm on my way!"

Just outside the door were two boys from Hal that she'd developed a close friendship with over her time at the mansion- Lucas Ikari and Duster Osohe. From different groups, true, but she felt a bond with them more significant than with many from Nintendo- apart from the team, of course. They'd been almost as proud to hear about her promotion as she had, and had promised to show up to the tryouts to watch her put the new team together.

"Hope you're ready to see the team that'll be kicking Hal's butt this year," Kumatora smirked mischievously at her comrades.

"I don't know," Duster shrugged, smiling right back. "We're not slouching either- and if you're the one coming up with strategies..."

"Oh, shut up," Kumatora gave him a light, playful punch on the shoulder.

Outside the stadium, Duster and Lucas separated, heading into the stands and waving farewell. Kumatora waved back, then entered to get into uniform.

XXXX

A few minutes later, she entered the stadium itself, to find hundreds- nay, thousands- of potential offense and defense members, brawlers, and seekers awaiting her. Okay, maybe it was only fifty or so, but to her nerves-addled mind, it sure seemed like thousands. Refusing to show said nerves, she cleared her throat to announce her presence. "So, as you all know, the Nintendo Smash-Up team is undergoing a complete overhaul this year- with a new captain comes a reshuffling of all the positions. This will be the first time in six years that we've held full try-outs for every position, so I just want to clear a few things up first- Captain Falcon, my predecessor, didn't accept any farting around, and I won't either- I'll only take the best of the best of the best of the best. That means that even those of you who've been on the team before, I want to see you busting your asses today- if there's someone better-suited, I won't hesitate to give your slot to them. Got it, you two?" She directed a quick death glare at the Faron twins, not exactly known for taking things seriously- they stood firm and saluted her, putting on serious faces- literally, masks with a serious face drawn onto them. Sighing, Kumatora shook her head.

"Alright, I want to get to know the people I'll be working closest with this year, so let's get the other two offense members out of the way. Potential seekers, brawlers, and defenders, take five- we'll get to you in a bit."

About half the group moved back into the stands, giving the offense plenty of room to practice. Out of the corner of her eyes, she could see the puffballs bringing out a bag of popcorn. She was ready to sigh heavily when she noticed Lucas and Duster doing the same. Huh. Well, whatever. Time to put these applicants to their first test.

The first thing she did was march right up to a rough-looking senior with a scar over the side of his lip. "Name?" she demanded.

"Ezio Auditore."

"Sounds Spanish."

"Italian, actually."

"Well, Mr. Auditore, before we begin, I have one request from you- I want you to hit me as hard as you can."

"Huh?" Ezio blinked in confusion, only to recoil as Kumatora flung her head forward, bashing him in the nose.

"Bam! The other team has the ball!"

Leaving him to nurse a bloody nose, she moved to what seemed to be a fifth year- blond and wearing a white shirt. "Name?"

"Elena Fisher."

"Hit me as hard as you can."

"But why-"

*WHACK!*

"You've just been hit by a chain chomp!" Kumatora growled, moving along. Next student- blond hair, yellow vest. "Name!"

"Tidus Zanarkand."

"Hit me as hard as you can."

"But I-"

*WHACK!*

"The other team just scored while you were staring, slack-jawed!" Next student- plaid skirt beneath a red cardigan. "Name?"

"AGIDYNE!"

A gigantic column of fire descended upon Kumatora, only narrowly blocked by her quick reflexes- and a PSI shield. When the fire had cleared, just about everyone was staring, slack-jawed, at the two of them- Kumatora and the girl in red. When Kumatora began moving forward, there was a collective gasp- except from the red girl, who seemed happily oblivious to the danger. "Is that what you wanted?"

Kumatora was growling. "That was reckless, over-the-top, and completely disproportionate." Brightening up, she concluded, "Well done! What's your name?"

"Yukiko Amagi," the girl bowed slightly.

"Amagi... I'll be sure to remember that name," Kumatora smiled. Raising her voice, she declared, "On the field, there's not always time to think- sometimes, you really do need to leap before you look. Tidus, Elena, Ezio- you're out. Everyone else, into your karts- we're going to do a five-lap race around the track- anyone who loses to me, consider yourselves out."

At these words, several more students than just the three she'd named walked off- Kumatora's skills as a member of the team's offense were legendary, after all. By the end, there were only twelve of the original thirty or so who'd come out. Kumatora went around, lining them up- to make it somewhat fair, she took the least advantageous spot at the starting line for herself, and didn't even turn her kart on until a few seconds after everyone had took off. Handicap or no, however, only one of them came even close to her time around the track- Paula Polestar, pulling through again.

Kumatora beamed as she turned around at the end. Before she could even speak, another six or so applicants were sulking off into the stands. Raising her voice, she declared- "Another crucial trait for those on this team is perseverance when all seems hopeless. To the five of you left- congratulations. Paula- you kept up with me, it was almost a photo finish there- welcome back."

Paula smiled, stepping forward to shake her friend's hand, then moving off to the stands, leaving Kumatora to gaze at the rest of them. "As for you, while you've all done well, only one of you showed much interest in the race beyond just going in five circles- you were playing to win. And that person is you!"

As she spoke, she performed a dramatic, Professor-Layton-style point at- you guessed it- Yukiko Amagi, who seemed surprised herself. "You mean... I made it?"

Kumatora nodded. "True, you were no Ana out there, but I'm sure we'll get you to her level with a bit of training. Welcome to the team."

"Th-thank you," Yukiko performed her slight bow again as she moved forward, shaking Kumatora's hand and going into the stands to sit next to Paula.

Kumatora turned to the remaining applicants. Truth be told, she was putting off the seeker trials as long as she could- always the hope that Mario would show up at the last second. She wasn't particularly keen on running the defense trials quite yet, either- that position was going to be someone new, no matter what. Instead, she turned to the brawlers. "Alright, everyone who brought their super scopes, come on down!"

Well, that dashed off a good chunk of the participants right off the bat- she was shocked how many hadn't thought to bring their own equipment. It warmed her up a bit, however, to see that the twins, for all their apparent ADHD, had been just as dutiful in bringing their scopes as always.

"Okay, let's get started!" she clapped her hands together. She first approached a senior in jeans, a half-tucked shirt, and black hair done up in a way that reminded her somewhat of Lucas. "Name?"

"Nathan Drake."

"Right. Now, I want you to hit-"

*WHACK!*

She'd only gotten halfway through the sentence before the butt of Drake's scope found its mark between her eyes. Shaking off the stars, she heard him saying, "Kind of hard to use that trick on us after we just watched you use it on them, you know?"

"True, true," Kumatora agreed. "Alright, then- Amagi, Paula, get down here! This will be a trial for Amagi, too- she's the rival team's offense member with the ball, and Paula and I are chain chomps. Direct us towards her to keep her from scoring. All clear?" Nods all around. "Then let's hustle!"

She went through all the applicants two-by-two. Within minutes, she realized she held no regrets about recruiting Amagi- she tore the field up, almost literally driving laps around some of the less talented brawlers. Others did better, managing to block her for a good while, and still others stopped her altogether. But by trial's end, there was no question who she'd be recruiting for her brawlers-

"Welcome back, Kirby, Meta," Kumatora shook both of the puffball's hands. "Glad to see you taking something seriously for a change. Here I thought you were just screwing around."

"Screw around? Us? Never!"

"Bring up those innocence halos of yours and I'll scrap them," Kumatora growled threateningly. "Just get in the stands already."

Next, she turned to Paula and Yukiko. "That goes for you two, too! I won't need any help with the others!"

Looking at the remaining applicants, she wondered what the best course of action. Glancing at the horizon, she saw the sun beginning to sink. Surely- surely- Fassad couldn't be keeping Mario for that much longer? Might as well grab him another half hour or so...

"Alright, defense!" she announced. "No more tricks- we're running short on time! Pretty basic- one by one, I'll try to get ten shots past you! The one who does best gets the spot!"

This time around, she greeted each one on an individual basis. Eventually, she arrived at a swordsman dressed in green. "Aren't you that guy who's always hanging around Mario? Blinky Darren, or something like that?"

"Link Faron," the swordsman muttered, sounding somewhat disgruntled.

Kumatora narrowed her eyes. "You aren't planning on getting on the team just because Mario's been one of our MVPs for the past few years, are you?"

"No," Link shook his head firmly, meeting her glare with one of his own. "I can do things independent of him, you know."

Kumatora smiled. "I like the cut of your gib. But I'll be the judge of that, if you don't mind. To the goals..."

On a certain level, she actually thought it could be a good idea to bring in a team member who already had good chemistry with one of their current members, but by the trial's end, Link had only managed to come in third, letting two of her ten shots, and while the ones he'd managed to block had been truly spectacular, she was keeping to the rules. Thus, she turned to the only applicant who had managed a perfect score- a rough-looking girl decked out in armor. "Well, congratulations..."

"Sully, Sully Miller," the girl greeted her. "Yeah, I expected this, to be honest. I've got some ideas about the direction this team will be taking-"

"Well, that's all well and good, Sully," Kumatora raised an eyebrow, "but let's not go forgetting who the actual captain is, okay?"

"You're not planning on talking down to me, are you?" Sully narrowed her eyes.

"Only as much as necessary," Kumatora narrowed her eyes back. "If I have an idea on how you can play better, I'll go ahead and point it out. Any problems, chief?"

Sully scoffed. "I've been watching you play from the beginning- I can tell you right now that I'm the best player on this team- I'm going to make that Falcon guy from a couple years ago look like a noob!"

Kumatora's eyes had become slits by this point. "Okay, maybe you are a good player, maybe not- but you're definitely not the best on this team," she growled. "Consider yourself dismissed."

"What was that?"

"You heard me!" Kumatora raised her voice slightly. "We need to be a team, here- no room for people who aren't- you know- team players. Either climb down off that high horse of yours, or get thee gone!"

For a moment, Sully stood there, fuming, and the next, she was gone, leaving Kumatora to rub her temples. "Alright, I guess that means the second place person gets it- looking at you, Mr..."

"Klavier Gavin," grinned a younger student- probably fourth or fifth year, with blond hair, a jacket in an interesting shade of red, and a stylized G hanging around his neck. "Achtung, baby! I've been hoping to join this team ever since I saw the incredible plays two years ago!"

Kumatora smiled- now this was more like it. "Glad to hear it- now, if you'll just join the rest of us over in the seats, then prepare to meet up with us at least twice a week..."

"What days?" he asked in that faint German accent of his.

"Hm?" Kumatora asked, raising an eyebrow.

"What days are we meeting up for practice?"

"Well, it depends on the week, really," Kumatora shrugged. "Coming up on matches, we're pretty likely to increase our practice time- is that a problem?"

Klavier Gavin bit his lip. "Hmm... you see, fraulein, I happen to be the leader of a band- the Gavinners- we played last year at the Festival. We meet up to practice as well, so you can easily imagine a scenario where the two might come into conflict..."

Kumatora sighed. "I need absolute devotion from all the team members. I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to pick- Smash-Up or the band?"

"Hmm... it truly has been my dream to join this team, you understand," Klavier spoke slowly, "however- I cannot turn my back on the other Gavinners. It pains me to say that, if I must choose, I choose them."

"Understandable," Kumatora nodded. "Well, then, good luck with your music."

"And you with the championship," Klavier nodded, grinning as he turned away and left after Sully. Kumatora blinked. There was a word for people like that... what was it... it was on the tip of her tongue... glimmerous... fop? Nah, that made no sense.

"Alright, well, that just leaves-" she turned to see Link already standing there. "Ah- Link Faron, right?" A nod. "Well... you were third... you don't have any prior commitments, do you?"

"Only if being president of the homework-dodgers club counts," Link smiled.

"And you're not gonna try and take over the team while I'm not looking, are you?"

"Do I look like Laxus Dreyer?" he asked, quickly scrubbing off the lightning bolt tattoo over his eye and discarding the longcoat previously perched precariously on his shoulders.

Kumatora glanced around. Well, he was the brother of the puffballs and Midna, one of the most legendary Smash-Up players of all, and he had placed third, so...

"Alright, you're in," she nodded, shaking his hand.

"Yeah!" Link cheered. "That's what I'm talking about!"

"Yeah, yeah, now go sit with the rest of the team," Kumatora waved him aside. "Time to figure out what to do about the seeker..."

Looking around, Mario was still nowhere to speak for himself. Sighing, she braced herself for the worst. "Alright, all applicants for the position of seeker- come on down."

XXXX

Twenty minutes later, Kumatora was pitch black, covered in soot, and completely bereft of hope for humanity. The seeker applicants were... pathetic, putting it nicely. She half-suspected that the majority of them had turned up purely for the prospect of beating Mario Mario at something, without checking whether they even knew which pedal did what. Seriously, the first person to try hit the reverse pedal and backed through the stadium, into the Flaaghra. That hadn't been fun... explaining that to Samus... but at least that guy hadn't missed the flipping keyhole. Seriously, it wasn't rocket science, just souped-up go-karts, for Wave Existence's sake!

And yet, the applicants were all looking hopeful as they awaited her decision. Really? Did any one of them think they came even close to outshining the best seeker on the team since Midna herself? Sighing and rubbing her temples yet again, she announced, "Okay, I've decided who the seeker will be- unfortunately, he's not here to claim the title right now, but the seeker will be... Mario Mario!"

There was an expected cry of outrage, and she could already hear words like 'favoritism,' 'buttering up the celebrity,' and even 'sexism' or 'internalized misogyny' being tossed around, but when she looked at her team, she could tell she'd suffer no ire from them- Paula and the puffballs knew their game well enough to tell that bringing Mario in was the only logical choice, and while Link and Yukiko might not know the game quite as well, they still seemed pretty appalled at the ineptitude of this year's selection of candidates. "Alright, now that that's decided," she spoke to them, stretching as she did, "let's take our showers and head up to the hub- I'm sure the puffballs are already planning the celebration party."

"How did you know?!" said marshmallows gasped with false awe.

"You were breathing," Kumatora smirked.

XXXX

"So, all in all, not a bad turnout, huh?" Duster guessed as she met up with him and Lucas on the way back up to the mansion.

"It definitely could have gone worse," Kumatora nodded. "The worst part was the seekers..."

"Yeah," Lucas nodded. "You think that guy who blew up his kart will be okay?"

"Yeah, Nurse Tessie'll patch him right up," Kumatora nodded.

"Hey, listen," Duster spoke, lowering his voice slightly. "I... I need to talk to you about something."

"What is it?"

"It's- it's about Mario."

Kumatora blinked- and though she could already guess what he was talking about, she decided to play dumb. "What about him?"

"Well, Lucas and I know the guy, too, you know... and even us over at Hal could hear that outburst earlier this week- and... it's not like it's his fault that Fassad jerk gave him detention..."

"You started this sentence with a point?"

"Maybe you should apologize to him?"

Kumatora sighed heavily. "Yeah... maybe... maybe you're right."

Duster smirked. "What did you just say? Did you just agree with me?"

Kumatora scowled. "I can take it back, if you want."

"Nope, nope, it's on record now," Duster grinned brightly. "Lucas here is my witness!"

"You did agree with him," Lucas offered a faint smile.

Kumatora relocated her face to her hands. "I hate you both."

"No you don't!" Duster teased.

XXXX

Kumatora was... nervous. She'd found herself on the receiving end of several apologies before, but didn't tend to spend much time on the giving end. Even as the party went on around her, she was drinking her soda somewhat nervously. Come on, it was a simple apology, what was so difficult about it?

The only time you can look afraid is when it's all over.

But if it's over, there's nothing to be afraid of!

Exactly.

"Good, great, awesome, outstanding, amazing!"

"All I did was press A..."

Kumatora turned and spied Mario at the other end of the room, presumably just receiving the news from Link.

"It was a great trial!" Paula called over to Mario and Link, fast-dancing with her none-too-subtle boyfriend, Ness Levi. "He tore that other competition up!"

Kumatora took a deep breath. Now or never. And yes, she was fully aware of the irony that this, of all things, was one of the most difficult things she'd ever done. "Well, that might be a bit of an overstatement..."

XXXX

This one's an idea I've had on my mind for a while- not something that's been burning at my fingertips as much as other things, but hey, it was there. Thanks to everyone who wished me a happy birthday- it really was. Thought I'd get this chapter out pretty early for my standards- a bit of a breather after the rather dark previous chapter. Hard telling when the next one will be up, but I'll try to be diligent about it- even if that is one of the less important stats in Persona 4. In the meantime, please R&R, constructive criticism embraced, flames, not so much, Gamer4 out.