Gamer4 in. Red like roses, fills my dreams and leads me to my rest... white, so cold, and yearning, burdened by a royal test... Oh, hey, guys! No, nope, not being weird here! Came in to write, thought I'd get started on this year's 'just-for-fun' Christmas special! (Disclaimer- this is being written in November, but knowing my update schedule, this'll be going up on boxing day anyways.) Set this up a couple chapters earlier, time to pay it off- as much as you want to call it that. See if you can guess which movie I was watching when I got this idea! Let's roll!
Disclaimer: -aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAST and landed, flat-out, on the grass. The players tried for a forward pass with the jester on the sidelines in a cast!
Random Quicky
Time Slip
"Come on, Lucina, we're gonna be late!" Robin called behind himself as he rushed through the Sierra dorms. Behind him was Lucina, still hopping as she attempted to slip into her remaining boot and put her beloved Falchion into her sheath at the same time. Behind her, moseying along seemingly without a care in the world, was Waluigi.
"Waluigi be sleepin' good afta last night," the spider-legged Sierra muttered contentedly.
"A little too well, from the looks of things," Lucina muttered, finally getting that boot on and rushing off, not even concerned about leaving her cape behind at this point. It had been a wild night last night, particularly with the *ahem* secret ingredient that Waluigi had seen fit to slip into those brownies of his. Normally, Lucina prided herself on not needing an alarm clock to wake up in the morning, but even Robin's insistence on setting said alarms had done nothing to assist her this morning- it had only been application of electroshock therapy on Robin's part that had dragged her out of bed at all.
By the time she'd gotten into the dungeon's hallways, Robin had already disappeared around a corner, leaving her rushing to catch up. She spun around and ran forward, only to feel a solid weight bring her to an abrupt stop.
"Sorry," she grumbled from the ground, as she realized said weight was another person. "Wasn't looking where I was going..."
"It's alright, neither was I," spoke a feminine voice- causing confusion within Lucina when she looked to see a young man on the ground across the hall from her. He was slightly taller than her, which honestly didn't surprise her- her height issues were rivaled only by Mario's. What did surprise her, however, were a few other key features of the boy- to begin with, his hair, which was the exact deep shade of blue as her own, albeit much shorter. It fell around his eyes, a light bluish-gray.* And, despite his calm voice, his eyes seemed wide in panic when he looked at her. "Well, gotta go!"
"Okay, I guess I'll... see you around..." Lucina nodded, feeling somewhat confused and wrong-footed as the boy leapt to his feet and tore off, seemingly as fast as his legs could carry him. "Who was he?" she wondered out loud- she'd never seen him around before, and yet, there was something strangely attractive about him...**
XXXX
"Oh, Wave Existence," Mario grumbled from the back of Samus's class, looking up from the book he was supposed to be reading.
"Something wrong there, Mario?" Link asked. "I mean, it's only a few minutes to the bell..."
"Not that," Mario shook his head. "I just got a really ominous feeling- I think we're in another random quicky."
"Not gonna go hide in the woods this time?" Link threw an amused sideways glance at his friend.
"Didn't exactly help last time, did it?" Mario pointed out.
"Ah, well, what's the worst it could throw at us anyways?" Link shrugged off.
No sooner were the words out of his mouth than Samus cleared her throat at the head of the classroom. "Due to the overwhelming success of the Festival of Trees last year, the Master Hand has decided to hold a similar event this year," she announced. "A smaller scale, of course, without Mycrowsoft and Sohnee, but we will be holding a Christmas dance in a few days, so those of you who need to prepare for it... well, prepare for it."
Mario groaned as he shot a glare at Link. "Link?"
"Yes?" Link placed his hands beneath his chin as he blinked innocently.
"I hate you."
"No you don't!" Link singsonged right back at him.
"That is all, class is adjourned," Samus spoke up again, banging a gavel on her desk.
"Was that really necessary?" Mario asked, raising his hand with his eyes half-closed.
"I've been binging Phoenix Wright, Spirit of Justice lately, so yes, it was entirely necessary," Samus nodded. "Away with you."
Mario continued to grumble to himself as he packed up and joined Link and Zelda in their exodus back to the hub. "Man, you know something's up when even Samus is going off the deep end," he muttered, only to interrupt himself with a loud, "OOF!"
"Sorry!" spoke the voice of a male student as a hand extended to help him back up. The voice suddenly took a turn for the feminine as it spoke its next sentence. "I've been really clumsy lately- you're the second person I've run into today!"
Making an educated guess based on the fluid gender of the voice, Mario shook his head, waving the apology aside. "No harm, no foul, Rob...in..." His voice trailed off when he looked and saw that the student before him was not, in point of fact, Robin. Her hair was too long, even for Robin's female form, and was a deep shade of blue rather than Robin's white. That said, a resemblance to Robin still definitely existed- those bluish-grey eyes seemed like a cross between Robin's and Lucina's, and that coat- Mario was pretty sure that coat was exactly the same as Robin's.
"I'm not Robin," the girl shook her head, her voice deepening as she became a he once again. "Er, I mean... I don't know what Robin you're talking about! Tim Drake? Dick Grayson? Jason Todd?"
Mario stared for a few seconds, performing his patented (a word which here means, 'ripped-off-from-Edgeworth') 'crossing-his-arms-and-tapping-his-shoulder' maneuver. "Don't I know you?" he asked.
The other student gulped, nervously raising his arms and tapping her index fingers together. "Er, I don't... I don't see why you would..."
"No, no, I remember you," Mario waved his finger as he recalled. "You're that Sierra spy that was watching the Nintendo team practice!"
"Spy? I'm no spy!" the other student's eyes widened indignantly. "I'm a time traveler, I'll have you know, and I'm not supposed to be here anyway, so there!" He ended his spiel by sticking her tongue out.
Mario stared, glancing around for Link and Zelda's support, but it seemed they'd moved on a while back, leaving only their blinking outlines behind. "A... time traveler."
An abrupt look of 'Crap, I-wasn't-supposed-to-say-that' crossed the other student's face. "Time travel? What are you talking about? I didn't say anything like that- you should get your ears checked, you sound like you're hearing things."
"No, no, these ears are fine," Mario shook his head. "See how big they are? I've got no trouble hearing anything, ever. And I'm pretty sure you just referred to yourself as a time traveller."
The other student sighed. "Okay, fine, yeah, I'm from the future. Don't tell anyone though, alright? The only person who's supposed to know I'm here is some guy named Mario Mario."
Mario's shoulder-tapping increased, a vein or two ready to pop in his forehead. "And... do you happen to know what this 'Mario Mario' looks like?"
"Of course!" Other-Student nodded fervently, only to subsequently quail beneath Mario's deadpan gaze. "Well, kind of... okay, no, I have no idea. You wouldn't happen to know where he is, would you?"
"I can describe him for you," Mario sighed heavily. "He's a little on the short side, but that thick, handsome moustache of his more than makes up for it. He's got a red shirt under some blue overalls, a round nose, and his power controller is a red cap he always keeps on his head."
"Always... on... his... head," Other-Student nodded eagerly. "Thanks, that'll be a big help- I'll... go... find... him... now..."
Mario sighed internally as the conclusion began to stretch across Other-Student's face. And a light dawns on rainbow head...
"*GAAAAASP!* YOU'RE Mario Mario?!"
"That's my name, don't wear it out," Mario nodded. "Now, want to tell me your name to begin with? The whole 'Other-Student' thing is getting old, I'm sure the readers would agree."
"Of course!" Other-Student nodded eagerly, as the author took one last chance to refer to him as such. "The name's Morgan! Morgan Mercer!"
Pieces of the puzzle floating around in Mario's head began to connect. "Mercer... blue hair... can't go for a few minutes without shifting gender... says s/he's from the future," Mario muttered to himself as Morgan positively quivered with excitement, watching him work. "Let me guess... you're about to tell me that your Robin and Lucina's kid from the future, aren't you?"
"Oh, you already know!" Morgan chirped brightly. "Well, that makes things easier!"
"Not quite- knowing something and believing it are two different things," Mario muttered. "Tell me, if you're from the future, what exactly are you doing back in my time?"
Morgan's ears turned red. "Well... that's kind of a long story..."
"Time seems to freeze during random quickies- we've got time," Mario attempted to cut into his bizarre conversation partner with his gaze.
"Well, you see, me and some friends of mine were taking a new model of kart- the Exo Tank- out for a test run- they're supposed to run on renewable goddess energy- but things got a little... weird. Somehow, the energy ran out, so my friend Laurent- he's our smart guy- he found another source of energy- time energy on the shores of Lake Delfino, left over from a huge time-shattering event from years and years ago, and he thought that could fuel it instead. So we headed over to the rift where the energy was coming from, loaded up, I fired that baby up, took it up past ninety miles an hour- and the next thing I know, I'm faceplanting on the lawn of the Smash Mansion- over twenty years in the past." Morgan's gaze broke from Mario's critical one, going down to where his index fingers were tapping together again. "You don't believe me, do you?"
"No, I do," Mario shrugged, causing Morgan to look up at him in confusion. "That story sounds just stupid enough for Gamer4 to think up. Besides, I... think I know what that time-shattering event might have been." Here, he rubbed the back of his neck, not overly eager to reveal his own role in said event. "Only one question now- why did you look for me, of all people?"
"Well, the way Mom and Dad talked about you in the future, they made it sound like you were pretty much the ultimate badass!" Morgan smiled brightly, speaking in a tone that didn't match her words at all. "I figured if anyone could help me get back to my own time, it would be you! Can't you just Mario Punch a door back to my time for me?"
"I think you've got me confused with Captain Falcon," Mario rubbed his shoulder, feeling off-put. Did Lucina and Robin really give him such a glowing reputation in the future? "Why not just replicate what you did before- get the time energy and blast back to the future?"
"Sounds good on paper," Morgan agreed, "but according to Laurent, for something like this to happen, there has to be a tremendous amount of energy going on- 1.21 jigawatts, he said."
"He said this before you came back in time?"
"He was speaking hypothetically- I doubt even he expected something like this to happen- but, yeah."
"And what the smeg's a jigawatt?"
Morgan raised a finger, but allowed it to fall uncertainly. "I... I don't know. Like I said, Laurent was always the smart guy in our group."
"Hmm..." Mario stroked his moustache in thought. "Just a sec- let me call up our own 'smart guy.'" He produced his cell phone and began dialing a number.
"Wait, you still use cell phones?" Morgan asked in surprise.
"What else would I use?" Mario asked, glancing at Morgan out of the corner of his eye.
"Oh, nothing!" Morgan raised her hands in a 'please-don't-ask-I'm-trying-to-preserve-the-timeline' kind of way. But he still heard when, off to the side, he muttered, "Scrolls are so much cooler, though..."
Mario finished dialing and raised the phone to his ear. One ring, two rings, three...
"Hello?" Zelda responded as she finally picked up.
"Hey, Zelda," Mario greeted. "I seem to have run into a bit of trouble here- a problem that requires me to generate 1.21 jigawatts. Any ideas?"
Zelda gasped dramatically. "1.21 jigawatts?! 1.21 jigawatts?! 1.21 JIGAWATTS?! 1.21 JIGAWAAAAAAAAAAAATTS?!"
Mario closed his eyes halfway and waited for Zelda to finish her seizure. "Yes, now what kind of hoops would I have to jump through to generate that kind of power?"
"No idea," Zelda readily admitted. "What the smeg's a jigawatt?"
Mario sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. This whole thing was getting to be a giant pain. Turning to Morgan, he whispered, "You're absolutely certain this Laurent guy said 'jigawatt,' right? Not something more... you know, real, like, say, 'gigawatt?'"
"No, no, he definitely said 'jigawatt,'" Morgan crossed her arms, only to falter again under Mario's stare. "Well, I'm pretty sure... at least, I think he did... okay, okay, it might have been gigawatt!"
Mario turned back to his phone. "Okay, sounds like my info was from a faulty source- I meant to say 'gigawatt.'"
"Well, even 1.21 gigawatts is nothing to sneeze at," Zelda mused from the other side. "To my knowledge, the only thing capable of generating that kind of energy is a bolt of lightning. Which kind of leaves you SOL, really- not even smashers can tell where or when those things will strike."
"I see," Mario muttered, stroking his moustache again. "I see, I see, Sam-I-am... thanks, Zelda."
"Any time," Zelda agreed, still sounding confused even as they both hung up.
"Doesn't sound good, does it?" Morgan asked, looking hopeless.
"Actually, if she's right- and she usually is- re-powering that kart of yours will be the easy part," Mario shook his head.
"It will?" Morgan's eyes grew bright again.
"What can I say, I know a guy who knows a guy," Mario shrugged. "Or rather, I just know a guy."
"But what do you mean by 'the easy part?'" Morgan asked curiously.
"Well, it's never that simple- especially in random quickies," Mario thought out loud. "It's a weird problem, that's for sure, but the solution is a little too simple- something else has to go wrong before this chapter's out..."
"Hey, Mario, who's your new friend?" came another voice- Robin's. Morgan gave a squeak of fright and ducked behind the pyromancer.
Mario glanced briefly behind him to check on his 'new friend's' gender. "Er... he's an exchange student... from Sohnee."
"Sohnee?" Lucina asked, eyeing the future child closely. "Interesting."
"I don't remember seeing him last year," Robin commented.
"He heard stories about how awesome this place was from his friends who were here last year, and decided to get into the exchange program this year," Mario invented wildly. "He's really liking it so far."
"Oh, really?" Lucina smiled warmly at him. "Because I'm sure I could find the time to give him a tour sometime..."
Hearing a frightened *Meep* from behind him, Mario shook his head. "Nah, I've got him all covered, don't worry about it," he waved his hands. "Oh, by the way- next Brigade meeting's delayed, with that Christmas dance coming up."
"Christmas dance?" Lucina asked, eyeing Morgan more than before. "Interesting..."
"Yeah, riding off the FOT's success," Mario nodded. "Sorry to delay the Brigade meeting, but I'm guessing most of everybody will want to go to the party anyways..."
"Seems likely," Robin nodded. "Welp, see you 'round, kid!" He ruffled Morgan's hair in a way that the future child seemed to enjoy, only for him to pale again as Lucina kept her gaze on him as she walked by, even more so when Waluigi passed, glaring daggers at him.
Mario kept his hand to his chin the whole time. "I see... Houston, we have a problem."
"What?" Morgan asked, looking up at him. "What is it?"
Mario sighed. "Come on, I'll explain in the hub... I have some calls to make... call in some favors..."
XXXX
"So, basically, this kid here is from the future?" Zelda summarized.
"Yup," Mario nodded, glancing at Morgan, 'ooh'-ing and 'ahh'-ing as she darted around a hub she'd never had access to before.
"Robin and Lucina's kid," Link smirked with all the maturity of a twelve-year-old.
"Mmm-hmm," Mario grunted his agreement.
"But she ran into Lucina earlier, and now she's falling for him instead," Zelda piped up.
"That would seem to be the case- it's the only time I've ever seen her acting... flirty, at any rate."
"Sucks for him," Link snorted. "This is all starting to sound like a weird movie from the eighties- so, what are we going to do?"
"Well, first, I've got a few favors to call in," Mario muttered. "To begin with, Peach, Maya, and Melia- we'll need them to pull off my plan."
"Hawley and the Smoots?" Zelda asked, stroking her chin. "Why them?"
"It'll all come together the night of the Christmas party," Mario assured her. "That said, we'll need... Tharja's help, too..."
"Tharja?" Link asked. "You want Tharja's help in matching Robin up with somebody who's not her?"
"I know it sounds weird, but this plan can't go off without her help," Mario nodded. "And finally- Luigi. He'll play a central role in all this."
"Well, I can't imagine Peach or Luigi turning you down," Link mused. "Maya and Melia will probably be on board too... but what about Tharja?"
"Relax, I've got it all planned out," Mario raised a hand. "I just need some help getting in contact with all these people."
"You're going to quite a few lengths for someone you just met earlier today," Zelda spoke up, sounding either impressed or exasperated, Mario couldn't tell which.
"Well, we made a deal on the way up here," Mario recalled. "I help him get back to the future, she'll do what he can to get this story cancelled."
Link burst out chortling. "Oh, that is so you," he chuckled. "So, gonna let us in on this big plan of yours?"
Mario sighed, rubbing his temples. "Alright, what we're going to do is..."
A few minutes later, Link, Zelda, and Morgan were all gathering around him, their jaws on the ground. "Mario... that might actually work!" Zelda gasped- definitely impressed this time.
Mario sensed many straight-man lines he could take, but he settled for continuing to rub his temples as he muttered, "It might."
XXXX
"So, you're down to play at the party?" Link double-checked again.
"Oh, yeah," Peach grinned. "The Peach Hit Four are back, baby!"***
"I thought you guys called yourself 'Hawley and the Smoots,'" Link pointed out, confused.
"Meh, that joke is so last story," Peach waved him aside.
Link blinked, but ultimately shrugged it off. "The only catch is, Lucina needs to be on the dance floor," he returned to his previous thoughts. "This plan of ours demands it."
"But she's one of us!" Peach pouted slightly, arms crossed. "We don't play without her- unless you know someone else who can rock out like she can!"
Link glanced around rapidly, searching for anyone who might fill that criteria. Eventually, his eyes fell on Morgan, listening eagerly nearby. "Hey, Morgan, I need to ask you..."
XXXX
"So, you think you can hit a target traveling that fast?" Zelda wanted to be absolutely sure- she never left anything to chance, especially in situations as *a-hem,* serious as this one.
"On paper, it sounds difficult, sure, but in practice, I think it'll actually be much easier," Luigi shrugged. "Just how lightning works, honestly. Just get us up nice and high... just... how does Mario keep getting himself into these situations?"
"I'm sure he's asking himself that right now," Zelda muttered, silently wishing her friend in red good luck.
XXXX
"Tharja! Hey, Tharja!" Mario called out, spotting the dark sorceress across the hall and sprinting to catch up to her.
"Ah, Mario... Mario. Our... fearless... leader," Tharja offered that creepy-as-all-get-out smirk of hers. "Don't worry, I've already been informed of the next meeting's... delay."
"It's not about that," Mario shook his head. "It's actually about the party itself- I need to ask you a favor." And with that, he quickly explained what he wanted her to do.
Tharja bit a nail as she mused over the request her leader had made of her. "Why would you ask me to do such a thing?"
"It's a long, long, long, long story," Mario muttered, doing his best to emphasize how much he did not want to talk about it. "Will you do it?"
"Well, it's hardly a bad idea... but what will you do for me in return?" Tharja smirked at him, clutching her book to her chest.
Mario sighed. "Tharja, you'd do this for free, and we both know it."
"Well, yes, however," Tharja interjected, "Now somebody's asking me to do it. Higher demand, higher the price. Basic economics."
Mario sighed again. Thankfully, he'd expected this, and had come prepared. "Well, I do just so happen to have this collection of amateur shots of Robin from all around the school," Mario muttered, lifting up a rather hefty binder and flicking through it a bit for Tharja's benefit. "I planned on keeping it in my dorm and eventually burning it, but if another student somehow got her hands on it... well, you know what they say about spilt milk."
Tharja's eyes narrowed, looking contemplative, though Mario was fairly certain they both already knew what she was going to say. "You've got yourself a deal," she finally said, slowly. "I'll do what you ask, and in return, I expect to find that binder in my stocking come December the 25th. If not, you may just have to suffer my... displeasure."
Mario shuddered- even if he'd been considering double-crossing her in the first place, the thought would have been driven from his mind by now.
XXXX
And so it came to be that the day of the party arrived. Lucina was currently looking at the rest of her band members with no trace amount of confusion on her face. "You're sure you guys will be alright without me?"
"Don't worry about a thing," Peach smiled, patting her on the shoulder.
"Every little thing's gonna be alright!" Maya agreed, putting her hands together and nodding with a wide grin on her face, as was characteristic of her.
"We have a stand-in guitarist," Melia nodded. "I believe you've met him- Morgan?"
Lucina blinked as Morgan made an appearance, doing his best to hold his male form and violently red as he glanced up at his mother. "I... I think so, yeah..."
XXXX
"So everything's in place?" Mario double-checked yet again. "Peach and her crew are playing, Tharja's on the dance floor, and Luigi's heading up to the roof?"
"Check, double-check, and triple-check," Zelda nodded, checking all of the above off on a clipboard. "Operation: Pyro Match Maker is good to go!"
"Maybe one day we'll just get to enjoy one of these parties as an actual party," Mario muttered, pressing his face into his hand.
"Wouldn't hold my breath on that one," Link smirked. "Last Christmas was the biggest gong show for you that it could have been."
Mario sighed. "Link, I'd say you were wrong, except for one thing."
"And what's that?"
"You're not wrong."
XXXX
"Another rock and roll Christmas! Another Christmas rock and roll! Another rock and roll Christmas! All dressed up so here we go, do I hear sleigh bells in the snow? Another rock and roll Christmas..."
Slowly, the Gavinners' song faded out, until Klavier himself took the mic to announce, "Alright, we're all done for tonight, babies! Fear not, though- we leave you in good hands. It is my honor to present to you- the Peach Hit Four!"
Those who remembered said band's performance the previous year, and got over the sudden change of name, cheered as Peach, Maya, Melia, and Morgan took over the stage from the Gavinners. "You won't be playing with them?" Robin asked, surprised, as he glanced over at Lucina.
"They thought I'd want to come out here and dance," Lucina shrugged.
Robin tilted his head a bit. "Could be fun. May I?"
Mario smirked as he watched from nearby- of course Robin and Lucina would end up dancing together- with Morgan out of the picture, at least. Everything is going according to the scenario, he mused to himself, assuming the famed Gendo Ikari pose (TM.) He glanced up at Peach and gave her the signal. Nodding and smiling back, Peach began playing a slower song. "Earth angel, earth angel, please be mine! My darling dear, love you for all time. I'm just a fool, a fool in love with you..."
Mario glanced back at Lucina and Robin. Granted, his plan was based on an assumption- an assumption that all Robin and Lucina needed to be pushed together was an opportunity like this. The skeptical part of his brain had called foul, but the romantic part (admittedly a very small portion of his brain at this point) had said the idea was perfect. It was Christmas, after all- the time of miracles.
His self-satisfaction died off a bit when he glanced upstage and saw that Morgan didn't seem to be doing too well- while he'd been doing a good job previously of maintaining his male persona, he was starting to shift more and more rapidly as she slumped backwards on the stage, looking as though he'd suddenly become intensely ill. The term 'Shapeshifter Swan Song' came to mind, and he thought he could spy only one reason- though Robin and Lucina were dancing together, there was still a certain awkwardness to the whole thing. Mario grimaced.
Maya seemed to have noticed too, glancing over at her newest friend with concern in her eyes. "Hey, Morgan, you alright?"
Morgan, sweating profusely, shook her head wearily from side to side. "I... this wasn't... I wasn't..."
Mario's fingers tightened together. Ever the cynic, he'd predicted even this- it was time for his trump card to come into play... but where was she?
He breathed a sigh of half-relief as Tharja seemed to spawn between the dancing couple. "I believe this dance... is mine," she whispered as she grabbed onto Robin and steered him away from his previous partner. Robin's eyes widened in surprise, and Lucina's jaw dropped as she watched her closest friend get steered away by the girl in black.
Mario's fingers tightened further- his knuckles had gone white beneath his gloves. This was it- the point where his plan was either made or broken. "Come on, Lucina..." he muttered into his hand-warmers.
"Come on, Lucina," Link and Zelda muttered, nibbling on each other's fingernails.
"Come on, Mom..." Morgan choked out, struggling to say anything through a haze of increasing pain.
"Excuse me," Tharja looked around at a tap on her shoulder, to see Lucina behind her, narrowing her eyes. "I was fairly certain it was mine."
A quick shove later, Tharja was out of the picture, and, a moment two years of thinly-veiled shipping in the making, Lucina pulled Robin in and pressed their lips together. Robin looked surprised at first, but eventually, closed his eyes and smiled.
Yes! Mario pumped his mental fist.
"YES!" Link and Zelda pumped their actual fists.
"Oh, yeah!" Morgan grinned, pulling himself to his feet at last, and playing with more gusto than ever before.
"I'm just a fool..." Peach smiled back at him, her band reviving itself along with its temporary member. "A fool in love with you!"
And, at long last, it came to an end. Before anyone else could say anything, Morgan seized the mic, looking more overexcited than ever before. "Let's rock this joint!"
And before anyone could stop him, he was jamming out on the guitar, leaving the others to rush and attempt to join his rhythm. Mario thought he recognized the song- You Will Know our Names. He couldn't help smiling when he saw everyone on the dance floor struggling to keep up as well. He thought he could learn to like this child of Robin and Lucina's. Only one thing left to do, then...
XXXX
"So, at the end of it all, hope you had fun here, twenty years in the past," Mario spoke over his shoulder as he guided Morgan up towards where Luigi should have already taken her kart.
"The whole 'almost-erasing-myself-from-existence' thing aside, yeah," Morgan shrugged.
"There's just one thing left I'm not certain about," Mario mused, stroking his moustache. "You say you came to me because of the way your parents talked about me- didn't you ever meet me yourself? I'd like to think I keep in touch with them in the future..."
Morgan's ears turned red. "Um... well, y'see, the thing about that is... um... er... hey, look, the exo tank!"
Mario's eyes narrowed as they finally arrived on the roof, where Luigi was smiling from the inside of what hardly resembled a kart- more like a motorcycle decked out with armor and three spears on the front. "That's a kart?"
"Karts get even cooler in the future," Morgan explained airily. "Alright, we all ready to rock?!"
"Oh, yeah!" Luigi nodded eagerly as he hopped out of the kart. "Always glad to help Mario out!"
"So, how are you planning to get that thing up to speed?" Mario asked.
"Easy- right over the side of the mansion!" Morgan beamed widely.
"And... you're not a little concerned about that?"
"The exo tank's smoooooth," Morgan grinned, running a hand over the edge lovingly. "No fall damage while I'm in this baby!"
"I'll take your word for it," Mario shook his head. "You ready?"
"Ready!" Morgan nodded brightly, revving the tank up.
"Ready, Lu?"
"Ready!" Luigi nodded eagerly, already with a ball of lightning in his hand.
"Alright, then, at the count of three- one, two, now!"
Morgan took off, moving faster than either Mario or Luigi could have predicted, but Luigi still managed to make his mark with that lightning, smacking it into the exo tank, causing it to glow brightly and, as they both watched with jaws on the ground, disappear in a burst of flame.
"So... that's it?" Luigi asked, looking somewhat surprised.
"Yeah... I... I guess it is," Mario nodded, feeling the same confusion.
"Seemed a little... hurried, didn't it?"
"Well, time was of the essence."
"That, or Gamer4 just really wanted to have a sort-of Christmas chapter," Luigi shrugged. "Maybe next year, there'll be a Christmas chapter that actually feels Christmasy."
"Did you just snark, Lu?" Mario glanced at his other friend in green with a raised eyebrow.
Luigi chuckled. "Well, I guess I picked up a few things over the past four and a half years..."
Mario smiled, patting Luigi on the back as they turned back to the mansion. "Luigi, I do believe this is the start of a beautiful friendship."
"Weren't we friends already?"
"...Don't ruin the moment."
XXXX
"So, there's just one thing I don't understand," Laurent commented as he and his other friends listened to the conclusion of Morgan's narrative.
"One thing?" Severa scoffed. "That, right there, is the biggest bunch of bull-"
Laurent raised his hands to silence her. "You say you came to the conclusion I said '1.21 gigawatts,' correct?"
"Yeah, so we did," Morgan nodded. "Why?"
"Because you were right in the first place," Laurent crossed his arms. "I did say 1.21 jigawatts- a unit of energy not discovered until seven or eight years after the time you landed in, and exponentially larger than a gigawatt. No normal lightning could have produced that kind of energy."
"Well, it came from a smasher," Morgan shrugged.
"Nonetheless, that kind of power us almost unheard of," Laurent shook his head. "Whatever smasher did this, they must have untapped power beyond measure..."
XXXX
"So, we can finally close this particular case, huh?" Link asked.
"Thank the Wave Existence, yes," Mario nodded, slumping in his chair. "One normal Christmas- dear lord, that's all I ask, just one normal Christmas."
"Even so, I'm proud of you, Mario," Zelda smiled at him.
"Why's that?" Mario asked, sliding his hat over his eyes.
"Always ready to help people, even without any reward in return."
"Don't make me sound better than I am, Zelda- like I said, Morgan's gonna get this story cancelled now."
"Is he?" Zelda asked skeptically.
"What do you mean?" Mario asked, lowering his hat slightly to gaze over it at his friend.
"Well, I just don't see how he plans on cancelling the story from where he is- you know, twenty years in the future?"
Mario's jaw dropped as the realization hit him, too. "Wh... wh... SON OF A-"
XXXX
*Due to my color-blindness, my sister, Blue Phoenix, came up with this eye color. Please direct any and all complaints to her.
** Not trying to ruffle any feathers here- I write this with the idea that this is her maternal instincts unconsciously kicking in, but since she's, y'know, in school, and doesn't have any kids, she mistakes it for another kind of attachment. Not sure how clear that came through, but that was the idea.
*** Shout-out to Feline Within, who pointed out last story that Peach actually has a band in canon, the Peach Hit Five. The number has been reduced because, of course, this story only provides four members.
Hope this chapter wasn't too scatterbrained for your guys's liking. Like I said, work on this began in November, not long after the last chapter was posted, but then, I wasn't sure exactly how to proceed with it, and there were some internal conflicts about whether to go through with it at all... by the time I decided to write this 'definitely just for fun' chapter and how I wanted to go about it, things were so close to Christmas that I decided to hold off 'til Christmas Eve- give you guys a present. Updates should return to normal after this, as I've got that itch to write back in my fingers, and we're back to normal chapters again. Anyways, should you want to return the favor with a Christmas gift of your own, the best way to do that- please R&R, constructive criticism with which the story may be made better embraced, flames, not so much, Gamer4 out!