The walk back to Mr. Lancer's classroom was automatic. Dash wasn't thinking about where he was going but he definitely got back to where he needed to be. Was he really doing this? Trading Danny's life for a scholarship?
But if he didn't then he wouldn't have a life anymore either.
"Hey, are you good, dude?" Kwan whispered across the aisle between their desks. Dash didn't even remember sitting down. "You look like you've seen a ghost."
Dash let out a choked chuckle. "No, no ghosts this time."
"Oh." Kwan paused. "What did they want with you at the office?"
"They-" Dash couldn't tell him.
"Was it bad news?"
Dash took a deep breath and shook his head.
"No, actually it was pretty good news. I was offered a full ride scholarship from some recruiters."
"What? That's sick!" Kwan smiled at him and it made Dash sick to his stomach. "What college?"
Dash's heart pounded in his chest. He hadn't thought that far ahead.
"I… I can't remember."
Kwan's brows furrowed. "What? How can't you-"
Mr. Lancer cleared his throat, interrupting him.
"Do you two have something you want to share with the class?"
They both shook their heads.
"Then it'll have to wait until after class. Mr. Baxter, open your book to page 213. We're going to be reading through Romeo and Juliet today."
Dash numbly pulled his book out of his backpack and flipped through the pages until he reached the beginning of the play.
"Thank you. Ms. Sanchez, can you continue where you left off?"
"'From forth the fatal loins of these two foes, a pair of starcrossed lovers take their life; whose misadventured piteous overthrows doth with their death…'"
The universe felt very cruel to him today. Like it was trying to play some sick, twisted joke on him. There was no doubt in his mind that he was living in a tragedy now. That he and Danny were destined to be star crossed lovers, never to be together. Dash would have hoped that if he didn't get to be with Danny that it would've been because he just didn't like him. Not because he was kidnapped, never to be seen again. Who knows how long Danny would survive like that if they thought he was some ghost.
His thoughts drowned Paulina's voice out and he could feel himself start to get lost in his head again. Something hitting him in the face startled him out of it though and he looked down to see what had hit him.
Kwan had thrown a ball of paper towards him and it landed on his desk. Dash picked it up and opened it.
Was it about your dad?
Dash furrowed his brows. He wouldn't be acting like this if something happened to his dad.
No. He tossed the paper back to Kwan's desk. A few seconds go by before it flies back over to him.
Your mom?
Dash's hands clenched around the note. Reminders about his mom were always difficult. If he had heard about anything happening to his mom he wouldn't even be here anymore.
No. There's nothing wrong.
He threw it back and rested his cheek on his hand. He tried to ignore the note when it came back again but then Kwan started throwing smaller paper balls at him. Dash sent him a glare and picked the paper ball back up.
You know you can talk to me about anything, right?
Dash frowned at the note. He couldn't. Not anymore.
Yeah, I do. But it's fine. Let's just pay attention to class. Lancer already called us out once, let's not make him do it a second time.
Dash tried to find where Paulina was reading from but realized that they had passed a couple pages since he was last paying attention. He finally found the line she was reading as she finished it.
"Why, such is love's transgression. Griefs of mine own lie heavy in my breast, which thou wilt propagate to have it pressed with more of thine. This love that thou hast shown doth add more grief to too much of mine own."
Dash wasn't very good at speaking this weird Shakespearean language, but he too had grief and guilt that will forever linger in his heart as long as he was forced to keep this secret.