After a long day of expedition outside the walls, Levi and Mikasa have just fought a battle against several Titans, leaving them both tired and somewhat battered. Despite their exhaustion, they feel a sense of exhilaration and accomplishment as they gear down and take a few moments to catch their breaths.
Mikasa, never the type to mince words, looks at him and simply asks, "Captain. How are you feeling?"
"Good." He replied quickly, not giving it much thought. As for the titans, they could be a nuisance, but he didn't see them being much of a challenge. A slight headache, but that was just from dealing with the blood and dust. "How about you?" He was a little surprised to see her question come. She typically never spoke unless he did, but this time, it seemed she took the initiative.
Mikasa thinks for a moment, then gives a slight shrug of the shoulders. "I'm alright, I guess." she says.
She pauses again, as if trying to find the right words to express herself. Then, she turns her attention to her gear, adjusting the sword at her hip and checking the straps on her uniform. "It's been a long day, that's all," she says. "But I can't really complain. Just glad that we were able to accomplish another mission." She turns back to Levi and gives a small, comforting smile.
He silently studied Mikasa's movements. He was curious as to why she seemed preoccupied. "I see." He said simply. As always, it was very hard to read his expression since he did not allow himself to show his emotions.
Mikasa gives another slight shrug as she finishes strapping up her gear, still keeping quiet as she does it. After a moment, she looks up at Levi with a questioning look. "Are you okay?" she asks. There's a slight hint of concern in her voice as she glances towards Levi's hands, which are now wrapped around the handle of his weapons. It's clear that she's concerned about his silence and demeanor. She may not show it openly, but she cares about Levi's well-being.
Even on her best days, Mikasa's concern was quite easy to notice. She cared. Which is why now, with Levi's hands wrapped firmly around the handle of his blade, her expression turned from concern to worry.
He stayed silent. His face remained as blank as ever.
Mikasa's worry only grows as Levi remains silent. She doesn't know what he's thinking, but she can't help but fear that he might do something rash. "Levi." she says quietly, hoping he'll catch his attention by his name.
Her tone is soft and gentle as she says his name. She's hoping that he will snap out of his current state, but she has no way of knowing what she can say or do to help him. "Are you sure you're alright?" she asks again, this time with a slightly more forceful edge to her voice.
That made him react. She'd used his name. For some who hated expressing emotions, he'd grown quite fond of hearing his name in her voice. And when it was laced with concern… Well, he wasn't the same as he'd once been. So, of course, his reaction was to turn his attention to her. "Yes." He said, his voice still as monotone as ever.
Mikasa looks at Levi's blank expression, relieved that he's spoken, but still concerned about the way he's acting.
"Okay." she says quietly after a moment's pause. "It's just that... you've been acting a bit strange today." She shrugs again, not wanting to push him too much, but still worried. "I'm just worried about you, that's all."
She offers Levi a small smile. It may be hard to read, but there's a gentle warmth to it, one that could only come from someone who cares about him.
He stayed quiet. Why is she insisting?
Mikasa steps closer to Levi and places a hand on his arm. She looks him in the eye for a moment before speaking. "Levi, if something is wrong, you can talk to me." She says this softly, but firmly. There's an intensity to her gaze as she looks at him, conveying a sense of urgency.
"Don't keep it to yourself," she says, her tone still gentle, but more persistent. "Talk to me."
"It's fine. I don't want to talk." He said simply, his expression remaining neutral.
It was not that he had anything to hide from her. It was just that he didn't know how to properly explain it. And he didn't want her fussing over him. In reality, deep down, he knew that he wanted her to. Which is why he kept quiet.
Mikasa pauses, a look of surprise on her face as she studies Levi's expression for a moment before stepping back, her hand coming back to her side. She doesn't say anything for a few moments as she watches Levi, a faint look of worry still in her eyes.
"Okay." she finally says quietly.
Despite her words, it's clear that she's still concerned about Levi and feels a bit disappointed that he hasn't opened up to her. But she figures there's nothing else to be done at the moment, so she doesn't push any further.
He wasn't expecting Mikasa's answer to be so easygoing. In fact, it confused him a lot more than it should've. She was the type who'd force him to be honest with her, but she had simply given up—which made him curious.
Why was this time different? Was it because he was in a weird mood? Was it because of the fight? Or was it because of someone or something else?
These were the thoughts that crossed his mind as he looked down at his blade and began to put it away without a sound.
Mikasa watches as Levi puts away his blade. Her eyes briefly flicker towards the sword, but she quickly turns her attention back to him. She studies his expression for a moment before speaking up again. "Levi." she says, a slight hint of concern in her voice. "Would you be willing to tell me what's bothering you?"
Mikasa looks at Levi with a calm and gentle expression, her tone of voice soft and gentle. There's a sense of genuine concern in her voice as she asks him about his feelings.
He'd said that he didn't want to talk. That he could deal with his emotions by himself. And yet, here Mikasa was, pestering him again. And to think she had called him irritating at one point. The irony was funny.
"No, there is no problem." He said bluntly, his hand still on his blade.
He was hoping that she would give up by the second time, at least. But she didn't. She was always so persistent when it came to him. It was like his privacy was important to her.
Mikasa doesn't look surprised by Levi's answer, because she already knew what he was going to say. She also knows that talking to him about his feelings isn't going to work if he's determined to keep everything to himself. So, she decides to try a different approach.
"Very well," she says quietly. "But I want you to know that if you change your mind and want to talk, I'll listen." There's a hint of fondness behind her words. Even though she's frustrated by his stubbornness, she still cares about his well-being.
Levi couldn't deny that he enjoyed hearing Mikasa's voice. Even when he was irritated by her meddling and concern, it was still soothing. He thought back to the days when they used to spend time together—just training, working and talking.
Perhaps he would be willing to speak after all.
"I have one condition," He said, and he turned to face her, letting his blade slide into his sheath.
Mikasa's expression softens ever-so-slightly. "A condition? Go on." she says with a slight nod. She's curious to know what Levi's condition is and how she can help him open up about his feelings. Hopefully, this time, she'll be able to make a difference.
"You're not allowed to interrupt me." He said, his expression still blank. He wasn't about to be interrupted while he was trying to express his true thoughts to Mikasa. And he'd made that blatantly clear with a tone that told her he wasn't kidding. He just hoped that she knew how important this was to him, and that she didn't speak at all.
Mikasa looks at Levi with a slightly stunned look on her face. He's always been stubborn and reluctant to open up, but this is unusual even for him.
She swallows. On one hand, she wants to respect his request; on the other, she doesn't want to wait in silence while he vents. "Okay," she finally says after a moment of hesitation, although her tone of voice suggests that she's reluctant to do so.
His gaze fixed to her own. Once again, his expression was entirely blank. Though deep inside, he felt more at ease, knowing that he had her full attention. That she wasn't distracted by anything else.
And now, he only had to work on finding the right words to use—so he could express his current feelings for her. And that was easier said than done.
Mikasa patiently waits for Levi to speak, knowing that he has something he wants to get off his chest. But she also knows that pressing him further will only make him clam up again and refuse to open up. So, she does her best to keep quiet and listen intently.
She studies Levi's expression as he seems to be trying to think of the right words to say. She can tell that this is difficult for him, but she has a feeling that he's about to say something important , and she's ready to listen.
Levi knew that Mikasa was waiting patiently for him. She was doing her best to not interrupt him; to not do anything to make him feel uncomfortable or irritated. She was doing her best to ensure that he would express what he wanted to say. She really did care. Because of her, he was opening up.
"I like you." He finally said. No hints of emotion in his voice.
Mikasa blinks in surprise when she hears Levi's words. She had expected him to say something along the lines of 'I want revenge' or 'I am tired'.
But, 'I like you'?
She stares at Levi in disbelief as her cheeks turn a slight pink color. She can't help but smile slightly, feeling flattered by Levi's confession.
"You... like me?" she asks softly. "In what way?"
"As more than just a soldier." He responded quickly, his voice still monotone and expression blank.
He felt a tinge of nervousness when she stared at him. But he didn't show it, of course. That was how it was supposed to be, after all. He hadn't expected the feeling of nervousness to be there, but it was.
Maybe it was because he had a genuine attraction for her. Maybe it was because of their past. Or maybe it was because he knew no one else could understand him quite like she could.
"More than a soldier... you mean as a romantic partner?" She stares at Levi, her heart racing at the thought of what he's saying. She hasn't ever seen Levi as anything more than her superior and a close friend. But, if he feels differently...
"Levi, I don't know what to say..." she says, her voice slightly shaken. She looks away, not knowing how to react to this sudden confession. She feels a bit overwhelmed, but also curious to hear more.
He didn't give her a direct answer. Instead, he just nodded, though he still wouldn't show any emotions. This wasn't him doing something to try and win her over. This was him wanting to be honest. He thought this was the right thing to do.
As for her reaction? He would just have to hope for the best, whatever she'd reject him or not. He knew that the words that he had said were strange, since she believed that he didn't have those types of feelings. But he did what he thought was necessary and told her the truth.
Mikasa doesn't say anything for a moment as she processes Levi's confession. She looks at him for a second, taking in his expression which, as usual, remains unchanged. She's both confused and a bit surprised by his declaration, but she isn't sure what to say.
She feels a bit overwhelmed by the tension in the air and suddenly becomes more aware of the distance between them. She feels her stomach do a slight flip as she considers his words. "Levi, I have to be honest," she says quietly. "I-I didn't know you felt this way."
"You don't know everything about me." He said, his voice still unchanged from earlier. He'd finally said the words he wanted to, even if Mikasa didn't yet know the full scope of his feelings.
But this was enough for him. And, judging by her surprise, it was enough to make it feel real to her.
"I guess not..." Mikasa finally says after a moment of stunned silence. She looks at Levi with a somewhat conflicted expression. She doesn't look angry or upset, just a little bit confused. "I'm not exactly sure how to respond to this," she says honestly.
She pauses and looks at Levi again, her eyes filled with uncertainty. "Levi, I just... I don't know what to say..."
This is something that she never expected to happen. Her feelings for Levi have always been somewhat ambiguous, but she's never thought of him in a romantic way.
"Don't say anything." He said after a few seconds, still not changing his tone of voice nor his expression. He spoke his mind. He told Mikasa how he felt, which had been the whole point of his little endeavor.
So, now there was no point in trying to explain. Or in him expressing his thoughts and feelings. He'd said what he needed to, and that was good enough.
Mikasa stares at Levi for a few more seconds, trying to process everything. The realization that Levi has feelings for her is slowly dawning on her, but it's hard for her mind to accept such an idea.
She doesn't want to break Levi's heart or make their dynamic awkward, but she simply can't fathom the idea of being in a relationship with him. While he's always been a good friend to her, she's never felt any strong romantic attraction towards him.
"You're a close friend to me, Levi," she says gently. "But that's it."
No reaction. If he was upset about Mikasa's response, he didn't show it. Of course, his emotions were more complex than what his expression told her, so it could be that he was hiding it. But he knew from the back of his mind that he'll get an answer like this.
He felt a sinking feeling in his chest as Mikasa said her words. But he wouldn't show it, no. Just like how he always did. He would just have to accept the truth. Why would she even have the same feelings for him?
"Okay." He replied, his tone flat and devoid of emotion. But there was one thing he could not deny; his heart felt hurt.
Mikasa looks at Levi for a moment longer, still finding it difficult to accept the situation. In her eyes, Levi's words had come completely out of the blue. She feels a bit sad for Levi as she can tell that he's disappointed by her response. But she can't force herself to feel something that she doesn't.
With a heavy sigh, she takes a few steps back from him. "Well, I think that's it then," she says quietly. "We should go back to the others."
Levi let out a soft hum, his expression still blank as always. Then, he nodded slowly. "Yeah," He said.
He wasn't bothered by the thought of Mikasa going back to the others now. He had known all along that she wouldn't return his feelings. Though, deep down, there had been a sliver of hope as he had believed that she would give him a chance.
But it turns out, that wasn't the case. His hopes had been dashed again.
Mikasa watches in silence as Levi seems to accept the situation for what it is. He doesn't seem too upset by her response, at least to her. Maybe he already knew that she didn't feel the same way. Or maybe he's just really good at hiding his feelings.
The situation and the tension in the air is still somewhat awkward though.
"Okay then." Mikasa says. She hesitates for a moment, still not quite sure what to say next, so she led the way.
Levi followed Mikasa's lead, turning around and heading back towards the others with her.
However, his expression remained unchanged. No frustration. No sadness. Nothing at all. Yet, the feeling of awkwardness between the both of them was undeniable. As much as he tried to play it off, he couldn't help but feel it. It was as if Mikasa knew, despite her not being able to see Levi's true nature. For once, he felt vulnerable.
He'd expected this, but that didn't matter. Nothing in life changed just because of a simple expectation. He just had to feel the pain that he felt right now. And maybe, after that, he'd get over her, and these silly feelings would pass.
Mikasa watches Levi for a few moments as she walks by his side, still feeling a slight sense of awkwardness between them. She also can't deny that part of her feels bad for Levi. She can tell that he's trying to hide his emotions and push them away, just like he always does. But despite her lack of romantic feelings towards him, she still cares about him as a friend. She feels a bit guilty as she knows that she's the reason behind his sadness.
The silence that filled the air between them was like a reminder of what had just happened. It's as if no words could fix the awkwardness they were feeling in that moment.
For Levi, this silence and awkwardness wasn't a new feeling to him, but he knew that it was for Mikasa. And he thought about how, in one way or another, it was his fault that she was feeling this way. It was all because of him that she felt awkward.
If only he hadn't said anything...
Mikasa is painfully aware of the tension between her and Levi as they walk back to the others. She feels uncomfortable and a bit guilty, knowing that she's the cause of Levi's sadness. If only she could've somehow returned his feelings in that moment.
She quickly tries to push those thoughts out of her mind and focus on the present. She looks over at Levi and sees him staring at the ground, seemingly in his own thoughts.
"Hey, Levi," she says softly. "You okay?"
Levi didn't bother looking at her. Instead, he just just continued to walk. Though his expression remained unchanged, he looked down at his blade as his thoughts ran through his mind.
"I'm fine." He said, his voice now sounding more stern. He wasn't trying to be rude, but he was also trying to avoid being pressed any further.
Mikasa's eyes narrow at Levi's tone, but she decides to drop the issue. After everything that's happened, her mind and heart are still trying to process what just happened.
She silently walks beside Levi for a few more moments before speaking again. "I... I have a question for you, Levi," she says carefully. She's a bit nervous, but she can't hide the curiosity in her voice. "You don't have to answer, of course, but I always wondered something..." She trails off, not quite sure how to phrase her thoughts.
Levi turned his head slightly to look at Mikasa, curious about her question. He knew that Mikasa had more questions for him, that she wanted to keep talking. So, he didn't answer her question, and instead, he just continued to walk in silence.
He didn't want to talk about what just happened. He wanted to forget it. But he also knew that it was still lingering between them. And so, he just kept quiet.
Mikasa looks at Levi for a few seconds, feeling a bit conflicted about what she should do.
She bites her lip slightly in indecision, not wanting to force Levi to do something that he doesn't want to do. But her curiosity eventually gets the better of her.
Mikasa takes a deep breath before speaking. She's trying to come up with the best way to phrase her question, since it's one that she's always been curious about. "Levi, you don't seem to feel much emotion in general." she says slowly. "But when you said that you liked me... I got the impression that you were actually being honest."
She trails off, hesitating slightly before continuing. "So, this is what I want to ask you: is it... Is it really that hard for you to... to feel these emotions?"
Levi turned his head towards Mikasa again, though his expression remained unchanging and blank as always. Even though there were no emotions on his face, internally, he was feeling frustrated and annoyed, as if Mikasa was pushing the wrong buttons.
"I have emotions." He said. His words were blunt and short. He couldn't bring himself to elaborate further; the thought of being vulnerable again made him uncomfortable.
Mikasa stares at Levi for a moment longer, feeling her heart sink as he gives such a short response. She was hoping that he would take her question more seriously.
She hesitates for a moment, not wanting to push Levi any further than he's already been pushed. But her curiosity about him is too strong. "Do you really, Levi?" she asks, her tone filled with a hint of sadness. "I know that you're not great at showing your emotions. But I'm curious. Does being around me make you feel anything... anything at all?"
Levi looked down for a few seconds, then turned his head toward Mikasa again.
"I don't know." He said, his tone still blunt and short. He had never been forced to talk about his emotions before, and he still wasn't comfortable with the topic. That was how things should be for him. He shouldn't have to speak about his emotions like this.
But Mikasa was still waiting for him to speak. And he couldn't say what he wanted to, which was to be left alone.
Mikasa feels frustrated by Levi's response, though she doesn't show it. He never opens up, never shows her anything about his emotions.
And yet...
Why did he confess to her in the first place? Was it just an outburst of a sudden feeling that he couldn't control?
"Levi..." she starts to say, her voice sounding more conflicted as she thinks out loud. "What did you want me to say when you said that you liked me? You knew I would say no, right? So, why? What was the point?"
Levi said nothing. He wasn't even going to acknowledge what Mikasa had just agreed to. In truth, the thought of sharing his emotions in any capacity bothered him. Talking about anything related to his emotions was uncomfortable for him. It made him feel weak.
But in his mind, he had already done enough. He hadn't been comfortable having this conversation to begin with, but he had still spoken his mind. And now, he just wanted to go back and try his best to forget what had happened.
The awkward silence filled the air. And so, he just walked in silence alongside Mikasa once again, trying to move on as if nothing had happened, even though everything had changed.
The feelings of regret and frustration still lingered in the air, though. And he didn't know what to do about them.
Mikasa slowly sighs, feeling frustrated at Levi once again. She never expected him to open up like this, but it still bothers her that he won't.
She looks over at him for a few moments before speaking. "I think it's best if we just leave it at this." she says carefully. Her voice sounds a bit softer now as she tries to ease the tension a bit. "We're both trying to push past this, and I think that, if we just ignore what happened, we can continue being friends."
Levi kept his expression neutral as Mikasa spoke. He didn't disagree with her. It was clear that this was the path that he wanted to take as well, even if, deep down, he wanted something else.
But he didn't say anything. He didn't answer her, just like he hadn't answered anything else that she had tried to ask him. This was the right option.
And so, he continued to walk, his pace never slowing nor speeding up. His focus still ahead, as he tried to forget the conversation they just had. He just wanted to be alone at his office at this point.
Mikasa feels a bit disappointed by Levi's response, but she also feels relieved in a way. If Levi just wants to forget about their conversation and not talk about it again, then she's glad to comply.
As they continue to walk, Mikasa doesn't try to push the topic any further. She remains silent for a few moments before speaking again. "So, what are you gonna do for the rest of the day?" she asks, her voice sounding more casual. She wants to move forward with the day and not dwell on what just happened.
"Paperworks." He quickly answered, not bothering to think too much over it. He wanted to get back to doing what he was supposed to, even if he wasn't exactly in the right mindset.
"I have work to do," He said, his voice and expression still blunt as it usually was. He didn't bother to ask Mikasa what she was going to do in the meantime. At the moment, Levi only cared about himself, and so, he just walked ahead while he let his mind wander.
Mikasa sighs once again as she nodded, of course, she had a feeling that Levi was going to say that. But she also can't deny that it bothers her that he didn't bother to say anything about her. Maybe she wanted him to actually care about her day. But she knows what Levi is like so she shouldn't be surprised.
With a heavy sigh, she begins to walk ahead of Levi, deciding to just focus on herself and ignore what just happened.
Levi stayed quiet as he walked. Now that the conversation with Mikasa was over, he had no one to talk to anymore, just like it's always been. And so, his mind began to wander.
He thought about Mikasa's words. About how his confession didn't make her feel anything at all. It had been clear, though. She was never interested in him like that.
He sighed. It was a sign that he felt disappointed, to say the least. But he had known this outcome from the start, and so, he just kept on walking. Eventually after many minutes, he reached the headquarters and made his way back to his office.
Mikasa remains in her own thoughts as she makes her way back to the headquarters as well. Despite knowing that she didn't feel the same way towards Levi, she's still feeling conflicted about the whole situation. Part of her wonders if it could've been different. That maybe if she hadn't been so dismissive, things could've ended up differently.
She keeps those thoughts out of her mind and tries not to dwell too much on them. She reminds herself that she can't change how she feels, nor can she change the way things happened.
His mind immediately went back to the conversation that he had with Mikasa, wondering why she had been so dismissive of his confession. He couldn't seem to get her out of his mind, despite the situation and the fact that he should be focusing on his work.
She begins doing her usual stuffs and keeps herself occupied, trying not to let her mind drift too much into thinking about Levi. Although it's hard not to think about him at this point.
Why did he confess if he knew this was how she would respond?
Levi thought about that exact question as well. Why did he confess, when he knew that Mikasa didn't feel the same way toward him? What was he hoping to accomplish? Why had he said those things to Mikasa?
He had been thinking a lot, but he still couldn't answer his own questions. Though, deep down, he knew why he confessed to Mikasa. He just really had feelings for her, and he couldn't hold it back.
Mikasa continues to think about Levi, wondering if she could've handled the whole situation any differently. Maybe she should've been a bit kinder about it. But in the end, she said no because she had to be honest with him. Even if it broke his heart, she couldn't lie about how she felt.
The more she thinks about it, the more that she feels bad for hurting Levi. He truly cared about her, and she just made him feel awful.
Levi knew that she liked him for who he was, but that wasn't enough for him anymore. Now that he knew that there could have been something between them, there was no going back.
For better or for worse, this is the truth of the situation. And that can't be changed.
end