HelloEver22: Thank you!
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Chapter 12
September 7th, 2023: Evening - A bar in the center of the still unnamed island settlement.
At the only (very crowded) tavern on the whole island-
*GLUG, GLUG GLUG!*
"Hey, barkeep! Another round~!" cried out an usually bubbly and lively bespectacled blonde waving around an empty beer mug that looked just a little too big in her comparatively small hands from the large table at the center of the bar she, the rest of her sisters, and Liam were currently seated at.
"Um, haven't you already had like, four drinks already?" Liam asked, still nursing his second drink of the evening and seriously wondering if shipgirls could even get drunk. 'At the very least, they can definitely outdrink me... not that that's very hard to do anyway...'
"Oh, it's no big deal, Master~ If anything, you should be drinking more! Right Bel? Everyone?" Enterprise replied with the faintest tinge of pink on her cheeks. Needless to say, such a social display was very much out of character for the usually shy and reserved blonde, bespectacled, bibliophile
New Jersey, for her part, just chuckled at the sight while leisurely knocking back her third mug of ale. "Honey just likes taking his time, y'know? Plus, he's kind of a light weight, especially compared to us, so don't be too hard on him, 'kay?"
"Wait, really?" asked the now wide eyed and genuinely surprised, book loving Royal Maid. "Huh. Wait, so how light are we talking here? Like, 'passes out after just a few drinks' light?"
"Take a look. He's already a little tipsy," Jean Bart said with a little teasing smirk, pointing over at a slightly buzzed after two drinks Liam. "It's why he's only finished just one drink since we got here."
"Master might not be much for libations, true, but he can certainly pack the food away though. He's already eaten a good two dozen house special extra spicy hot wings now," Belfast added with a light giggle, pointing to the two empty plates currently being taken away and exchanged for a third. "Speaking of which, I must make sure to learn their recipe later."
"He isn't the only one, Frau Alabama is already working on her third extra large roast turkey hot sandwich," Prinz Eugen said, lazily gesturing to the presently stuffing her face quiet beauty sitting to her left. "Can't say I blame them though since the food here really is quite good."
It was around this time that the tavern's owner and head chef had decided to come out of the kitchen and check in on their new guests and heard the shipgirls' compliments and couldn't help but feel an enormous sense of pride that his cooking was such a hit with the beautiful, living legends who came into town. Honestly, he was so happy to hear that they enjoyed his food that he couldn't help but want to strike up a conversation with them.
"Well, I'm surely glad you like the food! With not really bein' allowed to leave n all, ain't much else to do but improve on my trade, y'know? They ain't family recipes, but I spent a long time gettin' 'em just right!" said the rather proud tanned and older bearded man with a wide, toothy grin while lightly puffing out his broad chest.
Belfast, in her usually well practiced and almost all too perfect way, gave the proud older chef a polite smile. "Quite delicious, yes. Now, I hope you don't find this too forward of me to ask after only just meeting, but would you mind terribly if I asked you to teach me some of your recipes?"
"Huh? A classy beauty like you'd really wanna learn to cook from a schmuck like me?" the man asked, honestly a bit surprised but secretly very flattered all the same.
Belfast nodded. "Absolutely sir. As my Master's ever faithful maid and one who truly enjoys taking care of him, as well as my dear fleet sisters, I am always on the lookout for new delicacies to add to my repertoire so it would be my honor to learn from one so experienced in the culinary arts should the opportunity presents itself."
"... *Nom, nom, nom, gulp!* Yeah, everythin' here's super tasty! Least, I'd eat it every day if I could," Alabama added after wiping her gravy smeared lips, a very satisfied smile on her usually placid yet lovely face.
"Yeah, I mean, I've had my fair share of wings from all over the place, but none have been half as tasty as these!" Liam said, well on his way to finishing off his third plate of said specialty hot wings.
The older chef with the light stubble couldn't help but scratch the back of his head in mild embarrassment as he did his best to take in his guests' honest praise. Now, he'd gotten plenty of compliments over the years from the locals but always felt they were just being polite. However, to hear his first ever new customers from outside the island say such good things too? Now that was a real boost to his ego. "W, Well if you really wouldn't mind learnin' from an old man like me, then I don't mind! Just, uh, come by whenever you get a chance and I think we can work something out."
"Wonderful! I will be sure to take you up on that most kind offer, sir," Belfast said with a smile.
"Alrighty then, jus' let one of my girls know if you need somethin' then, yeah? I gotta get back to the kitchen. Lots of orders and all!"
Hearing that, Belfast's eyes flashed a crafty light as she saw an opportunity too good to pass up. "Master, would yo mind if I...-"
Having somewhat learned to read the crafty super maid's mind somewhat, Liam simply gave her the go ahead.
"-Sure, if it's okay with him, that is."
"Hmm? What's up?"
The silver haired maid turned to look up at the older, well built but friendly looking tavern owner and chef.
"If it wouldn't be too troublesome, sir, would you mind terribly if we started on those lessons now? In return, I shall endeavor to do what I can to help you in return. Within reason, of course," Belfast proposed, really happy to seize this golden moment.
"Oh yeah? You sure? I mean, I'd love the help, but I can't be makin' our honored guests do somethin' like that..."
Belfast shook her head. "It's nothing like that, sir. Consider it trade for the fine meal and hospitality. Also," she then gestured to the very, very crowded bar full of people watching and talking about Liam and the shipgirls. "you look like you could use the extra help."
"Haha, true! Business really picked up tonight because of you, huh? Alrighty, follow me to the back then!"
"Yes, sir." Belfast then rose and turned to Liam. "Master, if you'll excuse me."
"Hey, no worries. Just have fun, yeah?" Liam said with a small smile. "Actually, if anything, I'm looking forward to see what you'll make for us! I dunno why, but no matter how much I eat, I'm still really hungry so..."
"Haha! Not really a surprise Honey!" New Jersey said with a hearty laugh, a wing in her hand, courtesy of Liam's plate. "We've been workin' you to the bone with magic and physical training, and since that's the case, have a higher metabolism because of it so you're definitely gonna need to develop that stamina... for all sorts of reasons, so eat up!"
"...'All sorts of reasons'?"
"Yup!" Which was all the buxom bluenette was going to say on the matter, much to the silent agreement of the other shipgirls. Yes, poor Liam would most certainly need a lot of stamina if he was going to keep up with his shipgirls, a fact the more experienced older chef easily picked up on, smiling and shaking his head as he headed back into the kitchen.
- At the same time, at another table in the tavern -
At a random table in the left end of the tavern.
"So, how is it that a guy like that is their Commander again? He's not even a part of Azur Lane, so how in the fuck did he end up one? Lucky fucker...!" grumbled one of the two former Azur Lane Alliance soldiers who was a the port earlier when Liam and the others showed up. H
His friend, the other former Azur Lane Alliance member just shrugged. "Who knows, but you know you could just ask them, right? The Mayor did say it was fine to ask them whatever questions we might have so long as we do the same didn't he? Now seems like as good time as any to me... and, I'd be lying if I said I didn't wanna know either. Still, didn't figure you were the jealous type... Aren't you married?"
"...And you aren't!? I mean, a boring lookin' fuck like him has a literal battle harem! Like, how in the actual fuck, y'know? I mean, you get it, right?" The man half asked, half shouted with a slur before slamming down his empty mug. Incidentally, it was his fourth or fifth mug of ale by now.
His friend and former coworker just rolled his eyes. "I'm gay and dating your brother, remember? So no, not really. Besides, he's not really my type anyway."
"Pfft, whatever, let's just go already...!" the drunk man said dismissively after downing his fifth mug of ale.
"Um, right now? You sure?"
"...Yes! Now let's go!"
His friend just shook his head but otherwise quietly followed after his friend, really hoping his friend wouldn't say or do anything too stupid. 'Oh who am I kidding, this is Rick we're talking about here...'
- Back with Liam and the Shipgirls' -
While in the midst of enjoying the tail end of their dinner, Liam noticed a pair headed his way from the table across from where he was sitting.
'...Hm? Do they need something?'
It didn't take long for him to get his answer.
"...Yo! You guys got a sec?"
At those words, everyone at the table stopped their conversations and turned their full attention on the two men who just showed up. It wasn't just them either, but nearly everyone in the tavern but the kitchen staff did as well. Fortunately, or unfortunately (depending on your perspective anyway), alcohol did wonders for one's courage.
...
Well, for at least one of the two anyway.
'...Wow. I know I'm a little buzzed too, but these many people just silently staring at us like this is... way rougher on the nerves than I thought it'd be. Tony, I need cuddles...!' muttered the poor tag-along/former Azur Lane grunt standing behind his idiot friend.
Six sets of slightly confused and curious eyes turned their full attention to the pair of former Azur Lane servicemen wondering what they wanted while everyone else was just amazed that someone was brave enough to actually talk to them (the staff didn't count).
"...Um, so what did you guys need?" Liam asked, deciding to break the ice.
The second, definitely more drunk of the two men faced the slightly confused Commander and spoke.
"...Yeah. How, how did a boring ass, plain looking nobody guy like you get to be a Commander to all these hotties?"
His friend, hearing what the idiot in front of him asked... really, really wanted to slink away and say he had nothing to do with him. Unfortunately, it was too little, too late for that... 'Oh, great job you dumbass. Just go ahead and lowkey insult the shipgirls' most important person ever right to his face... And oh man, I am not liking the looks on some of those girls' faces either...! ...Seriously, fuck my life..!'
Save for the drunken former soldier who asked the question, everyone present felt the temperature suddenly plummet below freezing, along with the heavy pressure of six now very, very angry shipgirls doing their absolute best to not let their emotions get the better of them and act out, even reminding themselves over and over... and over again that the idiot just had one too many drinks and didn't mean to come off like such a dick.
...
Sadly, and regardless if that was actually the case or not, the man unintentionally decided to pour more oil into the barely contained fire of six already seething and angry human shaped weapons.
"Like I said, how did a boring ass, plain looking nobody like you get to be a Commander? I heard you aren't even a part of the Azur Lane Alliance, right? So what's the deal? How'd it happen?"
"Okay, um, fair question... but why am I automatically a boring ass, plain looking nobody, exactly? I mean, it's true, I guess, but do I really come off that lame?"
"...Um, yeah, kinda. I mean, no offense, but you don't exactly look or walk the part. Sorry, but I don't get it... I mean," the man rambled out, scratching the back of his head and trying really hard to get his alcohol filled head to make sense of his even more than usual jumbled thoughts in order, completely oblivious to just how rude he was coming off. Case in point, he didn't notice his friend slowly edging away with every word he spoke. "how'd some random loser like you even get that lucky...?"
(... cute the sound of a steel wire finally violently snapping in two from the pressure)
And there it was. Drunk or not, that was just one step too far for the shipgirls trying rreeaalllyy hard to keep themselves under control and not act out... a fact marked by the whole tavern going deathly silent from the rising anger reflected in the angry glares being leveled on the offending, albeit unintentionally, rude man standing in front of them.
"...What? What's with the dirty looks, huh? And why'd it get all quiet all of a sudden? I was just asking the guy a simple enough question, right?"
It should be noted that, drunk or not, the man in question was never known for being the most... delicate, or tactful with his words, and thus came off as rude more often than not; something that the locals had plenty of time to get used to and hadn't automatically thought about even with their new guests present, let alone warn them about. However, the damage was done and it was far too late to regret things now... far, far too late.
"...Oi."
"...Huh? What's up cutie? Need somethin'?"
Remember, the man was very drunk, a little too blunt for his own good, and completely forgot that these beauties weren't human but 'humanoid, autonomous weapons platforms' called shipgirls.
"What the hell do ya think yer doin' just runnin' at the mouth about my Commander like that, huh!?" came the cold, quiet, yet undeniably incredibly angry voice of Jean Bart, her normally cool and collected reddish eyes now flashing a dangerous, violent light that reflected the smoldering heat of her ever rising fury.
"...Hah!? The hell's your problem? I'm just askin' a how a guy like that could even be a Commander, that's all. Ain't my fault he looks like such a plain lookin' loser! Sheez, calm donwn. No need to get yer panties all twisted up."
And that was all she needed to hear before emotions overrode logic and her fist flew. Luckily, she still held back enough so as not to seriously injure the poor dumbass (even if he did, to her and her fleet sisters, deserve what was coming). After all, angry or not, a shipgirl's first priority was to protect humans, not beat them to death for running their mouths. 'Fuck it, I think I can get away with givin' him a broken jaw at least, right?'
Naturally, Jean Bart couldn't help but smirk a bit at that thought as she savored the satisfying sensation of her fist sink nicely into the rude asshole's face and the look of bewilderment giving way to shock as he flew several feet back into the hastily abandoned table behind him. As for Liam and her other sisters? Well, thoughts and reactions varied, naturally.
"...Jean Bart!? Holy shit, is he okay...?" Liam couldn't believe his eyes. Then again, he learned pretty early on when dealing with shipgirls that, more often than not, it was the calm, collected, and/or quiet ones that were the ones you actually needed to watch out for.. like Eldridge and Belfast, for instance. 'Speaking of Belfast, I'm glad she's in the kitchen. Wait, she is still in the kitchen, right...? Oh man, I really hope she is...!' Liam could only pray that that was the case, otherwise... 'Yeah, no. I don't even wanna imagine what could happen if she heard all taht...!'
"...Oh wow, Sis must be seriously mad if she's talkin' like that, huh?" Alabama observed, a little smirk gracing her otherwise usually expressionless, beautiful face.
"Huh? Oh, you're right," Enterprise nodded, finally noticing what Alabama meant. "She sounds a bit more coarse than usual..."
"Ahaha~ Yeah, Jeanie tries to come off all mature and detached most of the time but underneath is a real nasty and short temper though, haha~!" New Jersey cheerfully said with a light laugh.
Prinz Eugen, for her part, felt that wretch of a human got what he deserved and instead simply decided to sit back and watch the show a little while longer, mug of beer and characteristic unreadable smile on her face..
"...Um, shouldn't we step in or something?" Liam asked, a bit worried Jean Bart might've hit the guy a little too hard.
"Nein, that dummkopf is surprisingly sturdy so he should be fine."
"...Really?"
The Iron Blood silverette nodded before gesturing with her chin. "Ja. Look."
And, true enough, the man slowly picked himself off the ground none the worse for wear, though he was rubbing his now bruised and slightly swollen jaw while quietly cussing up a storm under his breath.
"...The fuck was that for, you crazy bitch!" the still alcohol addled and fuming idiot asked, knocking away a chair as he stomped back over to, and glaring down at, a still quietly seething Jean Bart. "Seriously, the fuck is your problem, huh!?"
"...Ya had the nerve to insult my Commander and then dare ask what the fuck my problem is?" Jean Bart shot back with an equally nasty glare at the stupid sack of walking, human shaped garbage in front of her, fists tightly clenched and ready to take another swing the instant he so much as breathed in front of her, her fleet sisters, or Commander the wrong way.
...And of course: flaring tempers, perceived injustices, and one two many drinks made for the worst combination possible as the former Azur Lane grunt took even more offense to being glared at, especially by the little brunette, ponytail'd bitch who had the gall to punch him in the face like that.
"...You uppity bitch! I don't give a fuck if the old man says you're our honored guests or not! Fuck you, and fuck that loser you call your Commander too! Now get the fuck off your high horse and apologize for hitting me for no reason, you red eyed cunt!" the man shouted back, long since consumed by his rage and hatefully glaring down at the ice cold beauty in front of him. Meanwhile, the people who stuck around whispered amongst themselves, wondering if maybe one of them should step in or call for help... at exactly the same time Belfast and the friendly older chef finished up in the kitchen and came out with a few plates of food in hand... only to witness the start of a possible massacre.
"Oi! Just what the hell is going on out here, huh!? Who the hell busted up my table? Better yet, who the hell is gonna pay to get it fixed!?" the normally friendly and laid back tall, well built, and now quite livid chef/tavern owner bellowed, shocking everyone back to reality.
"...Lady Jean Bart? Just what is going on here?" Belfast asked, a look of slight confusion on her face.
"...Um, are you telling me you didn't hear any of that? Really?" Enterprise asked, honestly surprised they hadn't heard the commotion.
Belfast shook her head. "No. Apparently, the room is magically sound proofed save for the front where the order window is..."
"Wait, really?"
Belfast nodded. "Yes, you see Mister Barrie here mentioned that it helped him concentrate on cooking and that, if it was an emergency, that someone would get him."
"So a whole lot of shouting and a guy getting punched into a table didn't count?" Liam asked, finding that a little hard to believe. "What, does that kind of thing happen a lot around here or something?"
Hearing this, the well built, older chef, one Alex Barrie, looked away while sheepishly scratching his cheek in mild embarrassment...
"Seriously!? Bar brawls are actually a regular thing here!?"
"...Um, well. Not being able to leave, people can get a little stir crazy sometimes y'see," Mister Barrie admitted with a sigh, tossing an irritated glance at the drunk ex-soldier who started this whole mess. "...Been awhile lately, but I'm guessin' Rick there musta said or done somethin' to upset your lady friend there?"
"Hey! All I did was ask a simple question! It ain't my fault that this crazy red eyed bitch overreacted!" the now named Rick indignantly protested, pointing a very angry finger at a deeply frowning Jean Bart.
"You repeatedly insulted my Commander you drunk piece of shit!" Jean Bart shot back in a low and calm, yet still very, very angry voice.
"...Goddammit Rick..," Mister Barrie grumbled, tiredly rubbing his brow in a practiced way that spoke volumes of how often this kind of thing must've been. "Okay, Jack? Tell me what the hell happened here, wouldja?"
The other former Azur Lane Alliance grunt and Rick's friend(who also happened to be dating his younger brother, Tony), Jack, couldn't help but let out a quiet groan as he slowly walked over, seriously wishing his boyfriend Tony were here with him. '...I better get me some fucking cuddles after all this!'
"Well? So what did this idiot say this time?"
Jack sighed as he collected his thoughts. "Well, it's basically like what this idiot said. But Rick, in his infinite drunken wisdom, worded things in the rudest way possible and ended up pissing off the shipgirls... which ended up with the ponytail'd one there punching him square in the jaw and sent him crashing into the table over there. Obviously she was holding back, and Rick was able to apply some last minute 'reinforcement' magic so he wasn't hurt too badly but well, I really don't want to think of what would've happened if she hadn't..."
"Are you serious?" Mister Barrie couldn't help but let out another long and tired sigh. "...Okay, so what exactly did this moron say-"
"Fuck off! I'm no idiot you old hack of a cook!"
"-to piss them off. And you shut the fuck up before I punch you next!"
Enterprise, partly owing to her photographic memory and own desire to see this mean jerk dealt with as soon as possible, was the one who decided to speak up and answer.
"...Um, his exact words were, and I quote, 'How, how did a boring ass, plain looking nobody guy like you get to be a Commander to all these hotties?'"
"...Ugh," hearing what Enterprise repeated, Mister Barrie couldn't help but groan as he facepalmed in total annoyance. "Sweet Holy Iris! No wonder she punched you in the face..."
"What the hell! All I did was ask a question! It's not my fault they flopped out over it!"
"I keep telling you this, but you still don't get it! It's not always 'what' you say but 'how' you say it! ... *sigh* Okay, fine," Mister Barrie then turned to face the still fuming Jean Bart. "I know the idiot was being more than a little rude and thoughtless with his question, but could you please let this one go... I mean, I don't blame you, but I really can't afford to have this place wrecked because of it either. I won't ask any more of you since this was on us for not reigning him in or warning you ahead of time, but could you please try to calm down some?" Mister Barrie knew he was pushing his luck asking a shipgirl to let a slight against her Commander go, especially since he saw them produce their heavily armed riggings and knew they could do much worse if they wanted, but he still had his responsibilities as the place's owner. Still, he knew he couldn't just ask that and not do something about the root cause of the problem either though. "And Jack?"
"...Y, yeah?"
"Could you take him home? I think your buddy's done enough damage for tonight, yeah?"
Jack just quickly nodded and nervously went over to try and get his still fuming, but slowly sobering up friend.
"Come on Rick, let's just go already..."
But, before Rick could say or do anything else, Liam finally called out to them.
"...Hey, wait a sec...!"
All eyes were now on him, causing him to gulp back a bit of his nervousness before looking the curious Rick in the eye and continuing.
"...Yeah? What?"
"Your question. I never got the chance to answer it. I um, know that now might not be the best time and all, but do you still want to hear it?"
"...And why would you still want to?" Rick asked, not understanding what Liam was playing at.
"To be honest? I kinda just wanted to get my thoughts off my chest since I've been wondering about how things turned out like this too... If nothing else, I got that you really didn't mean to come off like a dick and were just curious..."
"Commander?" Jean Bart was surprised. She, and the others too really, couldn't understand why he wasn't just as angry as them.
Liam smiled. "It's fine. I just don't want any bad blood later on and want to set the record straight so that nothing like this happens again, not that I'm blaming you or anything... if anything, seeing you girls get so mad on my behalf seriously made me pretty happy, not gonna lie," he then turned back to Rick. "So? Still want me to answer your question?"
Rick just grunted and shrugged, his mood much better now that the booze and anger finally started to lighten up. "...Yeah, sure. So? what's your story?"
And so, everyone left in the tavern quietly listened as Liam began to summarize the events that led him to him becoming a Commander, starting with what he was doing and the state of mind he was in about six months before his escape from the Eagle Union mainland. To be honest, Liam wasn't quite sure why he was being so talkative about it all, but he supposed it was probably the alcohol finally getting to him... or maybe, he just wanted to finally get everything off his chest and finally process it all.
...
Besides, he figured the girls should finally get to know just what sort of person their Commander was before all this craziness started, and it wasn't like he was trying to hide it either... though he'd be lying if he said that he wasn't self conscious about it either... Yeah, men are stupid like that and Liam Archer was no exception. Incidentally, he'd completely forgotten that the watch he was wearing was linked to the Hyperion so Metis and the others had been listening in to everything since he and the others stepped off the ship.
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