Well, I felt better after talking to him, but the problem was still there. She would have been disgusted knowing what I was experiencing in her regards, so I kept my line of conduct until Christmas holiday.
But it couldn't last and, in the end, it was her who came to me.
I was at home listening to some music on my bed, and she was there. Dad let her in.
'We need to talk' she said quite stern closing the door.
I had not even the time to pull myself together that she was sitting on the edge of the bed 'Why are you avoiding me?'
'I'm not avoiding you'.
'Albus, please, don't insult my intelligence. You are avoiding me alright'.
Truth to be told from laying relaxingly as I was, I crumpled in a corner as soon as she touched the bed to be as far away as possible from her, so my sentence was very weak to start with.
I didn't know what to say in reply therefore I didn't speak, trying to erase the alarm from my face.
'Is it because of my body?'
I gaped, crumpling a little bit more, and flushing furiously. How in the heck could she know?
She rolled her eyes 'Oh come on Albus. I'm not stupid.' And biting her lips 'But you are' she said accusingly, and I could see some mortification as she looked away and crouched on herself ashamed.
'It's still me, you know?! My body changed but it is still me! I'm the same person!'
Sensing all her distress I forced myself in speaking 'I know you are.' I only managed to mumble lamely taking the first comic book I could reach and burying my nose in it.
She hung her head and for some time none of the two did speak.
I truly wanted to explain her that it's not her the problem but me, but my mouth was completely uncapable of intelligible speech.
'I hate my body…' she murmured under her voice in the end 'It's horrible'
'Actually, I find it everything but horrible. That's the problem' I mumbled without even realising I had done so.
Her head tilted up so fast and her moist eyes looked at me with such a bewildered expression, I realised straight away what I just said 'I mean…' I gibbered quite hysterically raising the comic right in front of my face 'It's not that I looked… It's not that I… I mean…' I cleared my voice 'It's a fine body in its sort…'
I kept gibbering when honestly it would have been much better to shut up once and for all. It's a fine body in its sort? How could I even think to say something like that?
But as an answer she only laughed. Softly first and then a bit louder and then she was laughing so much she fold her arms on her stomach and tears sprouted from her eyes. What could I do if not laughing with her? And we found we couldn't stop, we laughed so much my breath was blunt. And when the mirth was quenching, we would look in each other eyes and we would start again even louder.
At one point I threw my comic away and I beckoned her to come close to me which she did, and, still laughing, I put an arm around her shoulder, and it felt perfect to have her there after months of estrangement.
And when the laughter by degree subsided, out of breath and finally at ease, I looked at her smile and I felt again that warmth pervading me. Although, instead of pushing her away as I would have formerly done, I simply kissed her… Or maybe it was her who kissed me… I'm not sure. Maybe we kissed each other at the same time.
And as with the laugh, it started soft and grew steadily more sweeping, we found out we couldn't stop. When we'd broke apart and we looked in each other eyes, we'd start again even more impetuously.
We never really stopped since then.
Yes, Rose was born my cousin. She has always been my best friend. She is my girlfriend now. She will be my wife one day.
Rose is my past, my present, my future. Rose is everything.