Katsuki gritted his teeth against the noise bouncing around the classroom walls. The class was chattering animatedly as they waited for Aizawa, who was already ten minutes late. He was trying to go over his English homework, but he couldn't fucking concentrate—partly because of all the goddamn noise that made his ears ring and partly because Deku was late too, and hadn't texted him to inform their homeroom teacher like he usually did.
He was trying to ignore the second point. After all, maybe he'd texted his nerd squad instead.
Aizawa dragged himself into the classroom at the twenty-minute mark. Iida even started to scold him until he recognized the haggard set of the teacher's face. He looked even worse than usual.
"Midoriya was involved in a villain attack. He is currently in the hospital. No one is permitted to see him—" he paused, eyes sliding to Katsuki who tensed immediately. "Except you. His mother requested your presence specifically."
Katsuki, who had gone deathly still, nodded once.
"Excuse me, but why him?" Uraraka asked, voice saccharine but shaded with disbelief and annoyance. "They can't even be in the same room together without fighting."
"It's what Mrs. Midoriya requested, and therefore the final answer. If I hear that any of you try to see Midoriya against his family's wishes, you will be immediately expelled." He stated, dark glare cutting across the room to the most likely perpetrators.
"Sensei," Bakugou called his attention back. "Do you mind if I call my mother to make sure she knows? Auntie shouldn't be alone in the hospital until I'm done with classes." Katsuki spoke, face carefully blank—almost bored to a careless observer. Aizawa was not a careless observer. He took in the rigid set of his shoulders and tight press of his lips and clenched fists and paling features and read the fear and concern in his student like an open book. After months of observing his two most problematic problem children, it wasn't a surprise to him. The rest of the class, however, seemed shocked that he even had a considerate bone in his body.
"Of course. Take your time." Aizawa gestured to the door, and Katsuki hurried out, ignoring the shock on his friends' faces or Uraraka's steely stare.
Auntie Inko had enveloped him in a hug as soon as he'd walked into Deku's hospital room. She was shaking—a violent full-body tremble that belied her fear. He could hear his mom speaking, but wasn't really processing her words because over Auntie's shoulder he was staring at Deku's prone form.
He was hooked up to a ventilator. There were dark purple bruises under his eyes. Katsuki had seen him less than three days ago, and now he was in a hospital. Hell, his mother had seen him healthy
less than 10 hours ago, and he already looked emaciated and pale.
Something was seriously wrong.
Aizawa was with them, discussing the minutiae of Deku's clearly serious quirk incident. He wasn't listening, because Deku was so still and quiet that if it weren't for the monitor, Katsuki would think he was dead.
Dead.
An intrusive picture flitted across the back of his mind—an image of what life would be like
without Deku. He shoved it aside.
He couldn't think about it. Not in front of Auntie Inko.
But then he finally heard what the adults were saying. Took in every detail about what was wrong with Deku. And he thought about it anyway.
There was a buzzing under his skin and a tightness in his chest. Lesser mortals would call it panic —or maybe terror. But he was the strong one. He didn't even panic when he'd been kidnapped. If he panicked now, everyone else would break.
He didn't have that luxury, but he supposed that was the price of being the strongest. Only one person could handle the full weight of his fears.
He could panic when Deku woke up.
Deku was in a coma.
A fucking coma.
On Friday, the nerd left to see his mom for the weekend. On Monday, he was in a goddamn coma. With a concussion.
And two skull fractures.
And a shattered tibia.
AND under the effects of an unknown but obviously deadly poisoning quirk.
Thankfully, Aizawa had been there and had gotten that information first hand, so he wasn't responsible for relaying it. Unfortunately, the eighteen other idiots he lived with didn't see it that way.
"Any news?" Eijiro asked him before he'd even taken his shoes off.
"His medical care is confidential. Fuck off, Shitty Hair." He grumbled, beelining for the kitchen where every-fucking-one else was waiting. He bit back a growl of sheer frustration and exhaustion and powered through. He needed to eat like...six hours ago.
"Bakugou! How's Deku doing?" Uraraka called as soon as he was in sight.
"Fuck off, Round Face." He grunted, grabbing his leftovers from the fridge and slamming the door behind him.
"C'mon! If you're the only one who's allowed to see him, you gotta tell us how he's doing!" She insisted, crowding him.
He's fucking dying. He thought vitriolically. And there's nothing I can do. "I don't have to tell you shit. Get the fuck away from me." He snapped, moving to stalk past her.
She grabbed his arm. "Hey! Don't walk away—"
He detonated the hand she wasn't clinging to right next to her face. "Get the fuck off me." She dropped his arm immediately. "Let me leave this fucking kitchen or I'll blow up the fucking building." He snarled.
He stormed into his room, shoulder checking anyone who tried to stand in his way or ask him fucking questions. He knew they were curious and worried, but fuck why were they putting the responsibility on him to be the bearer of disastrously shitty news? Did he seem like the type of person who handled emotional bullshit well?
He slammed the door to his room behind him as loudly as possible without actually breaking the door, ate his cold-ass leftovers, and dropped himself onto the bed.
And finally—finally—he cried.
Eijiro was waiting for him when he opened his door the next morning. He almost slammed it shut
again at the look on his face. "What."
"Walk to class together? I can help fend people off," He offered. Katsuki studied him skeptically. "I heard you last night, man. We share a wall." Fantastic. Shitty Hair had heard him crying like a bitch. Spec-fucking-tacular. "And you're right, his business is confidential and it's not your responsibility to keep us updated."
"Like that'll stop the nerd squad from prying anyways," Katsuki grumbled, pulling his door shut behind him in acceptance of Eijiro's offer to be his human shield. They walked in silence most of the way, but fuck Eijiro was a good friend, so he knew what was coming next.
The redhead stopped him just outside the main entrance. "I'm only gonna ask this once because I know you'll blow me up if I go overboard," Eijiro stated. Katsuki tried hard not to crack a smile. "Are you okay?"
Katsuki stared at him for a long moment, considering his options. He could lie. He could tell him to fuck off. But Eijiro was a good friend. "No."
Eijiro looked surprised at the admission but schooled it down quickly. "Anything I can do?" Katsuki shook his head. "Well let me know if that changes, okay? I'm here for you Bakubro."
When he went back to the hospital that afternoon, Deku looked worse. Whatever was poisoning him was causing bruising. It looked like the nerd had been hit by a semi-truck.
"What are you doing to find a cure?" he asked when the doctor stopped by to check in on him.
"A lot," she promised. "We have multiple people working on finding an acceptable antidote, and your teacher has recruited multiple teachers from your school to cross-reference CCTV footage of the villain's escape route with the Quirk Registry to try to find the culprit."
Katsuki's lips flattened into a thin line. That could take months, especially if the villain hadn't used any train passes or credit cards that could surface a name. "And how long does he have?"
The doctor paused, hesitant. "That's hard to answer. If there were a set rate of decay, based on how quickly his condition deteriorated in the beginning I'd say a month. But it's not moving at a set rate of decay. In fact, right now I'd say we hit a lucky break. The decay rate seems to have slowed. Realistically, I'd say two months."
Two months. Ice spilled through Katsuki's veins, stealing his breath like a sucker punch. That's not enough time.
Deku—Izuku. Izuku is going to die.
Mina approached him next, almost two weeks later. Two weeks of Deku's condition getting worse. Two days since Deku had the audacity to have a seizure in front of him. One day since he'd snapped in the middle of combat training and nearly blew up an entire city block at Ground Beta. The same city block where he and Deku had had their fight in their first year, so yeah he'd been a little triggered. Understandably, she was a lot pushier about it than Kirishima had been—showing up at his door and threatening to melt the lock if he didn't let her in.
He had long since learned to take her seriously. "Look, I get that you don't want to give us the gritty details, but you're turning into a basket case. We're worried about you, dickhead. We're not gonna give you shit, but at least let us listen." She demanded as she pushed her way into his room.
Katsuki studied (glared at) her for a long, pensive moment before whipping out his phone, texting the rest of his idiots. "I'm gonna do this exactly once." He growled when she asked him what he was doing. "I'm barely keeping my shit together, so we're talking about this once, and then we're not doing it again." His (mandated) therapist had been trying to get him to open up to people for almost a year now. This was a good time to start, right?
Kirishima showed up first, followed by Kaminari and Jirou, then finally by Sero. They made themselves comfortable in his room, understanding the space after almost two years of friendship. They sat in silence, waiting for him to speak, but he was kind of at a loss for words. Words had never been his strong suit, after all.
"What's up, bro?" Kirishima asked so gently that it set his teeth on edge.
"Ears, can you listen for eavesdroppers? Kirby's been so far up my ass I'm surprised I don't need a
colon cleanse," Katsuki grumbled.
Jirou made a face at the mental image but nodded. "Yeah, dude, of course. You gonna tell us why you asked us here?"
"Pinky said you wanted to listen and that you wouldn't give me shit. And uh," he scrubbed his hands over his face. "And you've probably noticed that I'm kinda losing it right now, so if she's right..."
"Of course she's right," Kirishima assured him. The rest of his idiots nodded frantically. He was so grateful for these assholes.
"Deku...Izuku was involved in a villain attack. You know that—that's all that Aizawa was really allowed to tell you—but it's...it's really fucking bad." He admitted, lowering himself into his desk chair and scrubbing his hands over his face. "The villain had a poison quirk and he's in a coma. He honestly looks like a fucking corpse most of the time and two days ago he had a seizure while I
was there that went on for three minutes. And I spent those three minutes thinking he was just gonna fucking die in front of me, so I am barely keeping it together—" he gritted his teeth against the lump in his throat.
It was silent for a long moment. He knew if he looked up at them, they'd be looking at him with fear and horror. So he didn't look.
"He's gonna make it though, right?" Kaminari asked hesitantly. Katsuki dug his palms into his eyes again.
"He might. But I don't think he is," he admitted, voice shaky and strained. He heard their sharp inhales of alarm and a small sob that he suspected had come from Mina. "They don't have an antidote. They don't know who the villain is. Two weeks ago, the doctor said she thought he had two months. Now they think he has one month left at best, and they're no closer to finding a cure or the villain."
"I know it's not really my place to ask," Sero started hesitantly. "But if it's that bad, why hasn't Mrs. Midoriya let anyone else visit? Why only you?"
"Because with anyone else there, she'd have to be strong," he replied with a wry smile, finally looking up. "She's known my mother for twenty years. When it's just us, she can break down as much as she wants to. She knows the hag and I will take care of being strong, so she can lose her shit as much as she wants."
Jirou frowned. "When do you get to lose your shit? This is hard on you too, Blasty. When do you get to break down? When do you get support?"
He looked her in the eyes. "Either after he wakes up or after we've buried him." He replied firmly. "No one can know how bad it is or else they'll hound the fuck out of Auntie, and if I break down they'll know it's bad."
"What about here?" Mina asked. He slid his gaze to her, only to find silent tears spilling down her face. "What about here with us, where no one else can see you?"
"No."
"Why not?" she demanded, a little desperate.
He fought back tears. "Because if I start now, I don't think I'll ever stop," he insisted with a pained snarl.
And yeah, they understood that.
So instead of letting him break down, they became a wall. Anywhere he went, he had at least two of them with him to fend off the rest of the class.
Eventually, some of the other members of the class had taken their lead—most notably Asui, Yaoyorozu, and Tokoyami. Tokoyami had been subtly holding back the rest of the class, scolding and reasoning with them in turn. He was out of his depth with Deku's friend group though. That's where the other two came in. In fact, the rift it had caused between Asui and Uraraka was monumental. Four weeks into Deku's coma, Uraraka had decided to badger Katsuki during a group study session and Tsu had snapped. They had screamed at each other in the common room.
"For fuck's sake Ochacko, leave him the hell alone! Midoriya's condition is confidential and he's
respecting their wishes, so you should too!" The shock of hearing Asui curse froze the entire common room.
"You're siding with him? We have no idea how Deku's doing, and he's not telling us anything! It's selfish and manipulative and you're a fucking idiot if you think he's doing this to respect Deku's wishes. Aren't you worried about him?" she demanded.
"Don't you dare suggest that I'm not worried about him. I just have the clarity to know that Midoriya and his mom's needs come first, something that you are ignoring. You're an idiot if you think insulting Bakugou and making his life harder is gonna get him to tell you anything about Midoriya's condition! You've been making his life harder for a month and you haven't achieved anything except pissing people off, so just leave it alone! You're like a dog with a bone!"
While they screamed at each other, Denki and Eijirou had smuggled him out of the common room. Mina filled them in later and apparently, the fight had gotten ugly. Like, bringing-up-Uraraka's- rejected-confession ugly.
The next day at lunch, Tsu had come to sit with them. "You don't have to tell me anything," she assured him. "But I want to make sure you know that I'm here for you, ribbit."
He broke eye contact and stared down at his food. "Thanks, Asui." "Call me Tsu, ribbit."
Two days later, Iida pulled him aside to let him know (loudly) that he disapproved of Katsuki withholding information. "Allowing us to continue worrying about Midoriya like this is unacceptable. Your actions are causing rifts within the class. The stress you're allowing your classmates to experience is on par with the level of disdain one would ascribe to a villain."
And then all of a sudden, Momo was there to punch him in the face. Katsuki stared at her, jaw dropped and eyes wide as she seethed over the fallen class rep. "Ponytail!" He exclaimed. She ignored him.
"You're lucky it was me, Tenya." She snarled. "If Midoriya had heard you say that, he would have kicked you into the stratosphere. Being the class rep doesn't give you the right to Midoriya's medical information, and it certainly doesn't give you the right to try to guilt-trip it out of Bakugou. Neither does being Midoriya's friend. It's an invasion of privacy and incredibly disrespectful to the Midoriyas to flout their wishes like this. You should be ashamed of yourself."
"Stand down, Momo. Jesus." Katsuki muttered, placing a hand on her shoulder. She rounded on him, still tense and a little shocked that he'd used her first name. "Hey, it's chill. Thanks, though."
"You are nothing like a villain." She told him seriously. Katsuki grimaced because that wasn't always true. "I mean it. You're supporting Mrs. Midoriya and making sure to collect all of Izuku's assignments and notes. They might not notice how this is affecting you but I do, and I'll be damned if I let them make you feel small when you're already doing so much."
He was not going to cry. Don't cry don't cry don't cry—
"Thanks, Momo." Mina said, appearing out of nowhere. "Mind if I take it from here?"
"Not at all. I still have a bone to pick." She replied, glaring over her shoulder at an uncommonly obstinate-looking Iida. Mina steered him away from the common room at top speed.
"You've got this Blasty," she murmured once they were alone in the kitchen. "You wanted to hold
it in, remember? Conceal, don't feel." He snorted. "Frozen? Really?"
"It got you to laugh! That's a tall order on a good day." She chuckled. "Seriously, though. If you want to change your mind, we can go to your room and you can let it out. But if you want to keep it all in, you've got this."
He shook his head. "Can't."
She smiled at him, soft and understanding. Mina was so warm. "Alright, then. Pull it together, Lord Explosion Murder."
They stood in the kitchen quietly, one of Mina's hands gripping his, and the other rubbing his back. "IS IT TRUE?" Denki demanded, bursting in and interrupting the silence. "Did Yaomomo punch
Iida in the face? Did I miss it?"
"I think Tooru caught it on camera. She was making a recording of trying to get Ojiro to blush. I
think she panned to Iida when he started pretending to whisper," Mina scowled.
"I'll be right back I need to see it—" he was out the door to find Hagakure before he'd even finished his sentence.
Deku had choked on his own blood today. Right in front of him, again. Luckily, Auntie had still been at work. She hadn't seen the splatter of blood paint the inside of his ventilator tube.
All Might had been there, though. Katsuki hadn't looked away from Deku as he slammed on the nurse call button, but he heard their mentor splutter on his own hacking coughs as he gasped in alarm. Maybe he was coughing up blood, too.
Their idol had been at Izuku's bedside as much as Katsuki had, but once Deku was 'stable' again, he'd turned his serious, scared eyes to Katsuki. "I want to be here for both of you, but I have to do something. I can't just sit here and watch. I'm sorry that I won't be here with you, but I need to try to find the villain. I hate to leave you alone, though."
"I'd rather be alone with a better chance for him to wake the fuck up." Katsuki had replied, raw and afraid; eyes stinging and heart pounding. "If you think you can help, then help."
He felt bonelessly tired. The type of exhaustion that followed mind-numbing fear. He nearly sobbed when he saw his friends at one of the common room tables with dinner that was clearly meant for him. He dragged himself over and slumped into the seat they'd saved for him, dutifully eating his curry (holy shit it was spicy, did they get Sato to make it for him with his own spice stash?) and drinking the tea that Momo brought him without complaint.
Unfortunately, the 'without complaint' bit seemed to be the Class A equivalent to blood in the water.
As Deku's time drew to a close, he'd been getting more and more volatile with each passing day— snapping from surly and brooding to outright violently deranged in the blink of an eye. The only people allowed to train with him were Kirishima and Icy Thot because he'd been unleashing his pent up rage and aggression in training like never before.
But right now, he was positively docile. That meant three things—one, something had happened
when he was at the hospital. Two, he was too tired from whatever it was to lash out, and his 'protection squad' was too caught up in taking care of him to create an effective wall.
Three, Uraraka and Iida had noticed and intended to take full advantage of the opening. "What happened?" Uraraka demanded as soon as she was within earshot.
"None of your business." He replied, standing to leave. Iida grabbed his arm, and Todoroki (who hadn't been as infuriating about pestering him but had still tried to pry information out of him) stood in his path.
"If something happened to Midoriya at the hospital today, you need to tell us. We're his friends and we're worried about him," Iida insisted. Katsuki shook his arm off.
"Shut the fuck up, Glasses. Don't tell me what to do."
Apparently, that was enough to thoroughly piss off Uraraka. "You're being an ass Bakugou! You won't tell us anything about how he's doing and you're acting like an asshole. You don't even like him, so why don't you let the people who actually care about him know how he's doing?" She demanded.
"Uraraka—" Eijiro tried to slow her roll.
"You're snapping at everyone, you're volatile and you're dangerous." Her voice was becoming poisonous. "You lash out at anyone who asks for any updates. We fucking get it, you hate him so much that you don't even want to hear his name, so let someone who actually gives a damn take care of him."
He turned on her, very slowly. There was a calmness to his movement that was so unheard of that it sent chills ricocheting down Eijiro's spine. Next to him, Denki shivered and he could see Mina backing away in his periphery.
"You don't know shit about me and Deku. You may think you're close to him, but I have a whole ass decade on you."
"Yeah, as his bully," Todoroki drawled. Katsuki flinched. "As an abuser who made him feel terrified and small his entire life."
"Todoroki, shut the fuck up," Eijiro snapped. Denki spasmed beside him in shock. The nerd squad didn't seem to even notice him.
"You strut around here trying to make everyone cower for you, treating everyone—especially Deku—like shit. You're an irredeemable asshole and he keeps coming back for more and I'm sick of it," Uraraka snarled. "His Stockholm Syndrome level devotion to you is going to damage him for life if it doesn't get him straight up killed."
Katsuki froze, then stumbled back from her, breathing growing ragged and eyes widening in sheer panic. Killed. Deku was dying. Deku was going to die. What was the last thing they'd said to each other? He couldn't remember. He couldn't breathe. Don't cry don't cry don't cry—
Eijirou pushed Uraraka aside and reached out to grip Katsuki's shoulder. "Katsuki, breathe." He could see Denki shoving Todoroki aside and Hanta and Kyoka standing in front of Iida.
"I can't—"
"You can. You have to. Breathe with me okay?"
"I can't, Ei," he wheezed, eyes blurring. Fuck, he was going to cry in front of all of these extras and
Deku was going to die.
"You can. You have to. Until Mido gets up, his mom needs you to be a hard-headed stubborn asshole, remember? You said it yourself—she can't break if you do," Kirishima reminded him quietly.
"Can't I—" Katsuki sobbed, squeezing his eyes shut. "Can't I change my mind? Can't I break here? Where she can't fucking see me?" He tried to keep his voice down. Really, he did, but he couldn't breathe.
Kirishima glanced around the room, eyes narrowing when he caught Uraraka rolling her eyes. "Not here. How about up in your room? You can let it out with the five of us, how does that sound?"
Todoroki scoffed behind him, but Katsuki was silent for a beat longer than most of them expected, pushing harsh breaths through clenched teeth. Finally, he nodded and Kirishima turned him around to push him from the room.
"Hey! We're not done here!" Uraraka demanded, lurching after them.
"Yes, you fucking are," Mina snapped, moving to block her. "Blasty's been going through the wringer trying to be there for Mido and his mom, and you're making this all about you. Have you even considered the emotional toll this is taking on Bakugou? Shut the hell up and back the fuck off you selfish cow! Any information we're allowed to have will come from sensei."
Todoroki scoffed again. "Emotional toll? Bakugou? The only emotions he has are anger and violence."
At the same time, Uraraka went off. "I'm making it about me? He doesn't even like Deku and he's acting like he's all torn up so that you five idiots will stop us from getting information—"
"Information that you have no right to have," Sero interrupted, furious. "Don't you think Aizawa would have told you if we had any right to know?"
"The only reason Deku's mom is telling Bakugou what's going on instead of us is that she doesn't know what Bakugou is actually like!" Uraraka snapped. "Deku probably sugar-coated Bakugou's bullshit so much that she thinks they're still friends—"
"They are friends. Just because you have your head too far up Mido's ass to see his relationship with Bakugou for what it is—for what it's become—doesn't mean that you have the right to spout baseless accusations or make judgment calls for the Midoriyas!" Mina snarled.
"She would be able to make more informed judgment calls if we were permitted to talk to her." Iida insisted. They couldn't really tell if he was yelling since his baseline volume was always earsplitting. "If Bakugou had done the responsible thing and told Mrs. Midoriya that we are closer to him than he is, I'm sure she would have—"
"Midoriya's mom has known Katsuki since he was born—a hell of a lot longer and better than any of you," Denki interrupted, yelling. "If you're so goddamn close, Midoriya would have told her about you, right? So she knows that you're friends and is still choosing Katsuki as her support system. Who the fuck are you to dispute that?"
"What the hell is going on here?" Aizawa demanded from the doorway. Beside him, Koda was
shifting his feet and wringing his hands, looking nervous and stressed as fuck. The quiet boy had clearly gone to go get Aizawa as the situation escalated. Mina spared him a grateful glance before turning her rage back on the fuckfaces that stood before her.
"Stay the hell away from him or so help me god, I'll melt your face off." She swore before storming away to catch up with Katsuki and Eijirou, Denki and Hanta scurrying after her. She trusted that the rest of the class would fill Aizawa in.
Kyoka went to Momo, who had graciously supplied them with bedding so that they could congregate on Katsuki's floor while he cried the night away. He let Mina and Eijirou hold him, curling into them like a child as he sobbed until he ran out of tears and collapsed from sheer exhaustion.
With the sound of his cries echoing in their ears, none of them slept.
"You should prepare to say your goodbyes." The doctor informed them. "We're still looking, but his organs have started failing. We want you to be ready for any outcome."
Katsuki held back a scoff. Auntie Inko was curled into his mother's side, sobbing. The bitter derision he felt for the doctor's stupid statement would not be well received. But really, 'ready for any outcome'? They would never be ready for Deku to die.
"Katsuki?" Auntie pulled away from the hag to curl into him instead. "Thank you for maintaining our privacy. Enforcing it, even. Aizawa told me about your troubles at school and how you've remained firm so that I could deal with this the way I need to. But maybe it's time to let them know. If we have to say goodbye, I mean."
There was no way to hold back the tears this time.
Uraraka had not stayed the hell away from him. In fact, all three of Deku's holdout nerds had doubled down so naturally, they were waiting to pounce until he returned. They didn't hold back just because he was still crying. They had to be restrained by tape and tongue and rock-solid arms just for Katsuki to get past the doorway.
"Momo," he called, raspy and raw. She was at his side in an instant. "Give me half an hour, then call a class meeting. Invite Aizawa and Eyebags. Maybe the 3-A streaker too. Just—" his breath hitched, and he took a second to speak past the lump in his throat. "Just give me some time to get my shit together."
"Eat dinner first," she replied, quiet and firm. His friends were still holding back the trio of dickheads, yelling at them for crowding him and not letting him have a moment of peace. Momo's concern was evident on her face, and for once he was grateful for it. "We'll have a class meeting in two hours. Eat dinner, wash up, get yourself together, then decide if you really want to do this. Because you don't have to. If Mrs. Midoriya gave permission, I'm sure Mr. Aizawa will do it for you."
He paused. "I'll take the two hours. But I need to—" he gritted his teeth. "I need to do this." "There's time to change your mind."
They both knew he wouldn't.
They called the class meeting. Both Shinso and Mirio were there, but Ojiro and Hagakure were missing. "They went on a date off-campus. Do you mind if I record the meeting so that I can just
forward them the video instead of explaining?" Tokoyami asked him. He shrugged. It beat having to repeat himself. He'd rather only go through this shit show once.
They congregated on the couches, waiting expectantly as Katsuki stood before them and dithered with red-rimmed eyes white-knuckled fists clenched at his sides.
"I'm not gonna sugar-coat this," he said, soft but firm. This would be the first time he'd say those words out loud which, illogically, made it feel so much more real. He very seriously thought he might be sick. At least barfing all over his classmates would get him out of making this announcement. Alas, his stomach stayed steady, even as the rest of him twisted and churned. "Deku is dying."
He had expected the instantaneous uproar, but he hadn't counted on it being so loud.
"What do you mean he's dying?" Uraraka demanded above the din, but Katsuki refused to raise his
voice over the crowd, so he waited silently for them to calm the fuck down.
A sentiment that Aizawa clearly supported when stepped in. "CALM THE FUCK DOWN!" He bellowed. Even if he tended to yell at them, Aizawa rarely swore. As a result, his demand was as effective as one of Katsuki's own explosions. The room fell silent. "Shut up and sit down if you want him to continue." They complied, still on edge and flighty.
"On the morning he was admitted to the hospital, Deku was involved in a villain attack. That villain had a poison-based quirk. He's been in a coma since then. At the two-week mark, he started having seizures. At the five-week mark, he started coughing up blood. Today his doctor informed us that his organs were failing. He thinks Deku has about a week left. They haven't been able to find an antidote for whatever's wrong with him, and the pros and police haven't been able to find the villain who did it. We have to be ready for the worst-case scenario. We might not find the fucker, so—" He furiously willed away his tears before continuing. "Auntie wants to set up times for everyone to visit in small groups and," he exhaled sharply. "And say goodbye over the next week."
Todoroki was the first to speak up. "You've known he was dying for a month and didn't tell us?" His voice was cold and sharp. Katsuki flinched back from him.
"We could have been with him this whole time!" Uraraka snapped. His eyes dropped to the floor.
"Mrs. Midoriya specifically requested that Bakugou keep Midoriya's condition to himself." Aizawa interrupted. "In the interest of supporting her, Bakugou did the right thing. Furthermore, you would not have been permitted to see him if you'd tried to visit him."
"But why did she choose him instead of us? Why has he gotten to be with Deku for an entire month?" Uraraka demanded, volume climbing.
"That's enough, Ochako!" Tsuyu interjected. "It was the choice Izuku's mom made, and you don't get to question how she chose to get support. She probably didn't want to have to deal with all of us when she was going through such a hard time."
"It seems strange that she chose Bakugou to support her when he so clearly dislikes Midoriya," Iida added, loud and stern. "If you knew his condition, you should have told her to allow someone closer to him to support her. That was quite cruel of you, Bakugou."
Uraraka seemed to agree with that thought wholeheartedly. "Is that what it is? You hate him so much that you don't even want him to be cared for on his death bed?" It was clear to him that they
were lashing out because they were upset and afraid. That didn't make it hurt any less. But he also knew that his friends were less understanding and more...protective.
Katsuki moved quickly, grabbing Mina around her waist as she lunged for the 'Dekusquad'. "They just got some really shitty news," he muttered. "Give them a break."
"No." She snapped. "They've been shitting on you for over a month, Katsuki. This has been eating you alive and they've just been pouring salt on the wound the entire time, and I'm sick of it!" she crescendoed into full-volume shrieking.
"What wounds? He's probably over the moon! Isn't this what you wanted? To get rid of him?" Uraraka needled.
"Every time he tried to get close you, you pushed him away." Todoroki agreed, furious. Was the temperature dropping? "How do you feel now that he'll be out of the way permanently, Bakugou? Glad?"
Okay, that was over the line.
He turned to them, face contorted and jaw clenched. When he spoke, he was quiet and hoarse. "Sixteen years. That little shit has been by my side for sixteen years, and we may have our problems but he's my most important person. Do you know what it was like to watch him run into danger when he couldn't use his quirk properly? Every day I had a brand new fucking heart condition. At the beginning of our first year, he still couldn't use his quirk without his bones snapping like fucking crackers, but he still ran headfirst into danger. It infuriated me. If—when I lose him, that's it. Everything I've ever done—good, bad, or irredeemably shitty—was to keep him safe. To avoid visiting his grave before we'd graduated high school. But no matter how hard I was on him, he was always there. Right behind me, reminding me what a hero really is. Reminding me how to be a good person. Pulling me back when I go too far or pushing me forward when I fall behind for my entire life. The old hag used to joke that the universe gave me twice the strength and gave him twice the heart, so we should stick together because without me he'll be weak and without him, I'll be a monster." He laughed, but it wasn't a funny thing—it was raspy and choked and full of self-hatred that made most of those present flinch.
"She was half right because he got strong on his own, so suddenly he could do it all without me. But I'm still the same, and he's still the true north on my shitty moral compass. Without him, I'm volatile and ugly. He's the only thing that makes me good. When he dies, I doubt I'll have what it takes to become a hero. I'm not even sure I'll survive it, because it'll be so much worse than a phantom limb; I'll have a fucking phantom soul."
He was trembling now, but now that the emotional verbal vomit had started, he was having serious trouble reigning it back in. "Do you get it now? Why I was always so pissed off at him? He went racing into shitty situations with his eyes wide shut, knowing that if he died, I'd end up destroying everything I touch. He's always known that. And he's still going to leave me behind—" His voice broke, sob echoing in the crowded room.
"Really? You hurt him because you care about him? Give me a break." Uraraka was still sneering, but it was losing its conviction.
"You're not hearing me." He rasped. Uraraka opened her mouth to interrupt, but Katsuki powered through. " I love him more than I love my own parents, and I'm gonna fucking lose him. I always knew he was going to die too young because he's so goddamn reckless, so I tried to hold him back long enough that he would think before he acted or learn to defend himself before jumping into shitty situations. But none of that worked, and now he's dying and I can't even be mad at him about
it because it wasn't because of his reckless martyr complex. He was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. All of the time I spent being angry with him was fucking wasted. I have to deal with that now, so unless you want to schedule a time to go visit the nerd in the hospital, I'm done talking about this. So fuck off with your judgmental bullshit and leave me the fuck alone to mourn in peace." There were silent rivers of tears spilling down his face. He was still holding onto Mina, but no longer holding her back. Instead, she'd curled into his chest so that he could clutch her close like a child clutching at a stuffed animal when they were afraid of the dark.
Uraraka and Todoroki looked like they wanted to keep pushing, but Aizawa put his foot down. "Drop it now, or I will ban you from visiting him period." He snapped. "How would you like to organize this, Bakugou?"
"One group a day, up to five people in each group for the rest of the week. Auntie said she didn't want people to linger for more than two hours. Even that's pushing it—I don't think she can hold it together that long," he admitted.
"Fine. I'll have a signup sheet posted in the common room by 9pm. Anyone who wants to visit Midoriya needs to be ready to leave immediately after classes so that Bakugou can return in time to attend to his own studies."
"Why would Bakugou's availability impact our ability to see Midoriya?" Iida demanded. Aizawa raised an eyebrow.
"Because he's the one registered with family privileges at the hospital. If you want to see Midoriya, he needs to escort you if you want to even make it to his floor." Aizawa drawled. Iida, Todoroki and Uraraka stayed quiet, but clearly didn't like the idea that they had to be with Katsuki in order to see Deku.
"Bakugou," Shinso called. "Is there anything we can do?"
"Whadd'ya mean, Eyebags?" Katsuki mumbled, still clutching Mina who had taken to rubbing soothing circles into the small of his back.
"I...don't really know. To try to find the villain? To help Mrs. Midoriya? I just...feel kinda useless." He admitted.
Katsuki shrugged. "I was gonna make dinner for Auntie and my parents over the next week so that they don't have to leave the hospital. If anyone wants to help with that, they can. I was also thinking of going to tidy Auntie's apartment after I take the first group to the hospital tomorrow so if anyone wants to help with that, they can meet me in the common room at 6. But I don't know if we can do anything about the villain. I've been focused on Auntie and my parents," he replied.
"Anyone who wants to help sort through CCTV or social media footage for the villain is welcome to," Aizawa offered. "But each student will be limited to an hour per day. You still need to attend to your health and studies. Anyone interested can see me about it in the morning."
The class meeting split, but people lingered to make plans or just...hold each other. Tsuyu and Tokoyami were comforting Koda and Shoji. Momo was hugging Aoyama tightly as he sobbed into her shoulder. The Dekusquad had left together. Satou approached the Bakusquad where they were bundled tightly near Katsuki, who was still clutching Mina like a lifeline.
"I'd like to offer to take over the food preparation for the week. You have enough on your plate, Bakugou." He offered, voice awfully small for someone so hulking.
Katsuki hesitated. "Let him, Blasty." Jirou murmured. "Let us help. You've been taking care of your parents and Mido's mom. Let us take care of you." He buried his face in Mina's hair.
"Fine. Okay. Thanks." He grunted.
"'S the least I can do." He replied. "Any requests?" Katsuki choked on another ugly sob. "Katsudon."