Valerie
I met a man. A lawyer. He was balding and a bit chubby, but his face was adorable. I did something idiotic. Albert Kloughn was a virgin. He didn't know how to use condoms, and it slipped off during sex. My period was two days late. I had only returned to Trenton one month ago and was already messing up my life.
The bathroom door opened, revealing Stephanie before she stepped inside. Stephanie placed the urine collection cup and pregnancy test on the vanity counter. "Bobby wants to send the sample for more tests. He has a collection kit for a blood sample if the pregnancy result is negative," Stephanie explained.
"Why me?" I asked. I pulled my pants down and sat on the toilet. Stephanie passed me the collection cup. "Stay," I whispered when she turned to leave.
"I'm not one for public pissing," Stephanie said, crossing her arms on her chest.
"Neither am I, but I need your strength," I confessed. Despite Stephanie's discomfort, she stayed in the washroom until the pregnancy test showed I wasn't pregnant. I was relieved.
"Bobby wants to run a pregnancy test using a blood sample. It's more accurate than the urine tests."
I nodded, hoping that the test showed I was not pregnant. "How did I fall into that mess again?" I unknowingly ask out loud.
"Valerie, you have a very low self-esteem for someone as pretty as you are. Think about how your actions are affecting your daughters. Do you want them to overhear the other children calling their mother a slut? What would happen if someone asked them about their father?" Stephanie calmly said. It was her pissed-off voice. I had heard it enough times while we were growing up to recognize the tone.
"Mom always paid attention to everything you did," I snapped. "She always talked about you."
"That's because she was embarrassed about something I did," Stephanie yelled. "Mom loved you more. I was the daughter who couldn't cook. Everything I touched burned. You were perfect in Mom's eyes. I started calling you Saint Valerie to my friends. Mom always encouraged you."
"To get married and have children. I did that, Stephanie. Where did it get me?" I demanded while washing my hands. We were still inside the bathroom at my condo.
"When Mom said to settle down and have a family, she didn't mean to fuck Joseph Morelli before getting married and when your husband wasn't around. You created this situation all by yourself," Stephanie argued. "Think with your head, not your hormones."
"Isn't that what you did with Carlos? Think with your hormones?" I asked.
"No," Stephanie said, looking lethal. I have never seen my sister that angry. Shit! I never want to see that look directed at me again. "We're not discussing my marriage, Valerie. Carlos and I have a connection neither of us expected."
As quickly as Stephanie's temper flared, it dissipated once she saw how much it scared me. "Valerie, do you remember Great-grandma Csapo?"
"Yes. She was a bit loony. I remember her telling us about soul connections. It's a bunch of nonsense," I replied as Stephanie shook her head.
"Valerie," Stephanie said, taking my hands in hers, "stop letting the guilt and hormones guide you. I know there's a perfect man for you out there. He isn't Albert Kloughn. Don't let Mom direct you towards him. Sure, he's a lawyer, but he's an ambulance chaser. I discovered he received his law degree online."
"You must be smart to become a lawyer," I argued.
"I never said Albert Kloughn lacked intelligence. His degree is legal. I'm saying Albert isn't good at his job. What happens if the blood test shows you're pregnant?"
I shrugged because I never really thought about the consequences. "Mom would want me to marry Albert," I replied.
"Valerie, I'm not asking about what Mom would want. What do you want?" Stephanie asked. Nobody had ever asked what I wanted. Except for Stephanie. "Do you want to marry Albert?"
"No. I like Albert, but we really don't have any chemistry. He was horny, and I wanted to help," I replied.
Stephanie smiled, and a cute giggle slipped through. "That's your answer, Valerie. I pray the urine pregnancy test is right. You don't want to marry Albert Kloughn and work hard to support him and a family," she said. Stephanie laughed at whatever thought popped into her head.
I laughed, unable to stop myself. "Any child of his would be like the Pillsbury doughboy," I said. Stephanie laughed harder until she kicked me out of the washroom. She had to pee.
"That's exactly what I thought," Stephanie said when I closed the door. I heard her laughing as she peed, making the urine hit the toilet in spurts. "Get away from the door," Stephanie hollered when I snorted.
Bobby was waiting for me in the living room. At least, I assumed the man with the medical bag was Bobby. I was surprised by the number of guests in the house. "Um… hi," I greeted awkwardly.
The men, except for Ranger and Lester, introduced themselves. I met them a month ago when I started working at Rangeman. The other men were in Miami until yesterday. I had already left work before they arrived. My palm tingled as I shook the dark man's hand. Electricity flowed up my arm, settling in my heart. Holy shit! Great-grandma Csapo was right. Oh boy. Mom was not going to be happy.
My skin erupted in goosebumps as Bobby took the blood sample. It didn't hurt when Bobby inserted the needle. Bobby was gentle for a muscular man. He placed the vial in the sample bag inside the cooler pack and then called Zip to collect the blood for testing.
Mary Alice entered the room, rubbing her eyes from waking up. "Hi," she shyly said to Lester before sitting on his lap. "Are you Mommy's friend?"
Stephanie smiled when she came downstairs. "I see you're a chick magnet," Stephanie teased. "You're a beautiful chick, Mary Alice." Stephanie tousled her niece's curly hair, making Mary Alice smile. Mary Alice could pass as Stephanie's daughter. I never noticed Mary Alice was a mini version of Stephanie until I saw them beside each other.
"I said chica magnet, not chick," Lester groaned. Stephanie tried to remove Mary Alice from Lester's lap, but she held onto his shirt. Lester said, "Liana, Stephanie's two-year-old daughter, is the same with her Tio Lester. She can't let go either."
"Leave her, Steph," I said. "Mary Alice doesn't easily trust people." My daughters don't like Albert. I should have noticed my daughters' reactions before sleeping with him.
"Are you my Tio Lester, too?" Mary Alice asked.
"Yes," Lester replied. Mary Alice grinned at her new uncle. I smiled at my daughter. She was happy to have another uncle.
Angie came downstairs. She was shy around strangers. I was surprised when she sat on the dark man's lap. "Hi. I'm Angie. Mary Alice is sitting on the other man's lap."
The men introduced themselves to my daughters. They had already met their Tio Carlos the previous month. Lester wasn't in the office whenever my daughters visited Rangeman. I told them about their Aunt Stephanie and showed them pictures. Angie and Mary Alice recognized Stephanie when they met face-to-face.
"Where are the other kids?" Angie asked.
"Sleeping at home," Stephanie replied. "Tio Carlos and I came over this morning to help your mother and introduce her to the team before she went to work. Grandma Plum has an appointment this morning. You and Mary Alice are coming to work with us. Tio Carlos and Tio Lester will drive you to school. Is that okay?"
"Yes," Angie replied. "Tio Bobby, can you take mine and Mary Alice's blood?"
"Why?" Bobby asked.
"So we can find our dad," Angie replied. She started grade three at the local public school. I couldn't afford to send them to the Catholic one.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"The kids at school said Joseph Morelli was my dad. I want proof. The school nurse said the best way to check was through a blood test," Angie replied, showing she put a lot of thought into her answer. My daughter was too smart for her own good.
"How are we going to get a sample from the detective?" Tio Carlos asked.
"Grandma Plum said Joseph Morelli loved Aunt Steph. I thought Mary Alice could ask him and give him her famous puppy dog eyes," Angie replied, grinning at Mary Alice when she produced the look Angie mentioned.
"Wow. I couldn't resist that face," Lester said. He thought Mary Alice was a beautiful girl, like her aunt. Liana and Theodore resembled Stephanie with their curly hair and blue eyes. Their skin was a perfect blend of Ranger's and Stephanie's. Teddy's face was shaped like his mother's and Liana her father's. It was easy to see the familiar features. Ricardo looked identical to his father.
I was thankful my children resembled me, but another student, Tony, indicated Angie had the same nose as his Uncle Joe. Who would have guessed that Anthony Morelli had a boy Angie's age?
Stephanie pulled me aside while Bobby collected the samples from the girls, after getting my permission. "Do you mind if I take Mary Alice to Pino's for lunch? We could try coaxing a sample from Morelli."
"How are you going to do that?" I wondered.
"Mary Alice will give him the puppy dog eyes and ask if he's her daddy. I will suggest getting a paternity test since her conception date was when you were in Trenton for Christmas six years ago," Stephanie replied. I wasn't sure if it would work. The uncertainty of Joe's reaction made my stomach flip.
"What if he says no?" I asked.
"Plan B. We take his utensils, napkins and glass for testing," Stephanie replied. "Valerie, I'll have Bobby, Tank and Lester with me. They can grab the items we need. Pino will understand."
I chewed my lip. The dark guy sat Angie on the couch beside him. He got up and approached me. Gently, he lifted my chin to see in his chocolate-brown eyes. "I won't let anything happen to Mary Alice," he promised.
"Okay," I whispered.
"When we get the test settled," he said, pointing over his shoulder, "we can get to know each other. I'm not looking for a one-night stand. I want something to last a lifetime. Don't repeat the sins of your past. We have a special connection that I want to explore. But I will walk out of your life if you continue with your promiscuous ways. Do you understand?"
"Yes," I breathily replied. His breath was hot on my forehead. The fingers holding my chin were warming me in all the right places. I felt the palpable electricity flow through my body.
"Good." He kissed my forehead and released his hold on my face. Losing the touch of his fingers on my face made my heart hurt. My forehead tingled from the kiss. I knew he was the one for me. I must wait for him. Then, I begged God and every deity in the universe for me not to be pregnant.
Stephanie helped me get the girls ready for school. "Ella has breakfast at Rangeman for the girls," Stephanie said after reading her text. "She said to bring them right away before it gets cold."
Albert called while I was driving to work. I wore my headset so the children couldn't listen to our conversation. Of course, they could hear mine, but I could carefully word what I needed to say. "Hi, Val. I'm calling to say we can't date anymore," Albert said when I answered. He made it easy for me.
"Okay. Why?" I asked.
"I'm getting married in a few months. My mom and her friend arranged our union when we were born," Albert confessed. I couldn't believe another man used me. "Thanks for teaching me how to pleasure a woman."
"Goodbye," I said, then hung up. I silently prayed to the Gods for my womb to be empty.
Angie caught my eye in the rearview mirror. "Are you okay, Mom?" she asked.
"I'm fine, sweetie. Albert said he was getting married," I replied. She didn't need to know the details, but I had to tell someone.
"Hannah?" Mary Alice asked.
"Who is Hannah?"
Angie gave Mary Alice a dirty look. "Hannah is the woman Albert called after the first sleepover," Angie replied. I had no idea that Angie and Mary Alice knew about Albert spending the night. Albert always left before the girls woke up.
"Is that why you didn't like Albert?" I asked.
Both girls answered, "Yes and he acts like a big goofy dog." I wasn't fooling them. I was fooling myself.
We arrived at Rangeman. It was a black seven-story building on Haywood with parking below ground. I used the employee entrance at the back. Stephanie and her husband used the entrance off Haywood. Everyone had fobs to open the gates, securing the parking area.
I found my parking spot near the elevator. The girls grabbed their backpacks and unbuckled their seatbelts. Angie told Mary Alice to wait for me to open the door. I smiled and got out of the car. A Hispanic man with a teardrop tattoo below his eye opened Mary Alice's door.
"Leave her alone," I screamed.
Lester arrived to diffuse the situation. "His name is Hector Garcia. He's the IT specialist," Lester explained. He repeated everything in Spanish. Hector winked at Angie and Mary Alice, who giggled.
"Does he speak English?" I asked. Lester shook his head.
Mary Alice reached for Hector. He helped her step out of the vehicle. With Mary Alice's backpack slung over his shoulder, Hector guided my daughters to the elevator. Hector waited for Lester and me to get inside before pressing the button for the fifth floor.
I rushed to the bathroom when I felt the familiar cramp of my period starting. Luckily, I had tampons in my purse. I sent Stephanie a message saying I wasn't pregnant. Stephanie said we should wait for the blood test results to be sure. Her last pregnancy test showed negative. Nine months later, she gave birth to her youngest son.
~~~~~
Joseph Morelli
My stomach grumbled, reminding me it was time to break for lunch. I decided to buy a meatball sub at Pino's, my go-to meal restaurant. The thugs from Rangeman entered after I ate the last bite of my food. Stephanie and her daughter entered. She sat at the back with the thugs. When did Stephanie have a kid? I noticed the rings on her left hand when she walked past me. Stephanie was married.
I wiped my mouth and approached the back table of the restaurant. "Cupcake," I said.
"Don't call me that," Stephanie demanded.
"Is she your daughter?" I asked.
"No. Mary Alice is my niece," Stephanie replied. I could tell it was the truth. The men at my table were listening. I glared at them over my shoulder.
"Are you my daddy?" Mary Alice asked. She gave me the puppy dog eyes I had trouble ignoring.
"No, I'm not," I replied.
"Would you get a test to prove it?" Stephanie asked.
I laughed, shaking my head. What would I do with a daughter? I would agree to a test if Mary Alice were a boy. Girls don't interest me unless they are eighteen and willing to have sex.
"What did she want?" the rookie Benny Gaspick asked.
"A paternity test on the girl," I replied.
"Is she yours?"
"No," I answered. I drank the rest of my soda and tossed cash on the table. The waitress quickly scooped up the money before someone took it. She left the dishes behind. I watched as she went to the back table to collect their orders.
Two weeks later, I received a registered letter. Angie and Mary Alice Plum were my biological daughters. The two times I had sex with Valerie produced my progeny. I visited my lawyer for advice. The judge ordered Valerie to get an unbiased paternity test using a blood sample. I should have the results around Thanksgiving.
"How are we handling this?" my lawyer asked.
"I want to sign over my rights. I have no use for daughters," I replied.
The lawyer tried to talk me out of it, but I refused. I don't want to support two daughters with Valerie Plum.