September 7, 2023: I finally got the Wi-Fi set after a cat fight of epic proportions with my condominium, the company and some of my neighbors talk about a toxic start. I'm posting everything I had done up until now.
August 21, 2023: I'm writing this in my living room having just moved out running from my old house, and we have no internet whatsoever here. It costs an arm and a leg and they sure take their sweet time. So I'll post this whenever I can steal my neighbors Wi-Fi or if I somehow get the money for the only available internet company in the area. Again I'm sorry for not being able to keep up with my commitments.
This is the end of the second life. We´re starting on the last life, 3rd life comes with a surprise. That's why I wrote the whole thing actually. So if you're still up with me so far, I hope you enjoy it.
Was it even possible to die from a broken heart? Reasonably speaking that wasn't even a recognized illness, nevertheless that´s how everyone diagnosed the first ever Hogwarts resident to be labeled grey lady.
Rowena Ravenclaw herself.
She walked the hallways silently and lost in her own thoughts and she seldom shared them with anyone anymore. She was still known as the brightest witch of her generation, but all her spark was… gone.
It was blow after blow… after all no one could blame her. First she lost her husband and firstborn and then one of her dearest friends; nothing was bound to be the same.
She couldn't keep the secret any longer when Helga found her passed out in her tower. She had to tell the truth, confronted and surrounded by the other founders, her friends.
Going back and forth from Narnia was draining and it was having a negative effect on both her health and magic. She had to choose a side of the portal, for it was certain shed die if she keeps crossing.
And she will take her unborn child with her.
Salazar had delivered his diagnosis with all the tact he was capable of, showing that nearly inexistent side of his, his compassion.
But it didn't make it hurt less. She couldn't even have a glimpse of Narnia though mirrors and water anymore. It was just… gone. As if it never happened.
She had left her husband and her little boy promising to go back as soon as possible after Hogwarts sent its students home for the winter break.
She promised!
Salazar left after shattering her world to pieces. Even if it was a little bit unfair to hold a grudge when he was just the messenger to the devastating news she already knew, deep inside and in denial all the while.
Godric and Helga were devastated for her but also furious for her recklessness, and that coming from Godric Gryffindor was saying something, the man wasn't exactly a role model for prudency.
She literally couldn't even get a glimpse of Narnia and whenever she tried she got weak and terribly sick. So it was decided that Salazar will go and inform Rilian about it, since he was the one that got along better with him. And maybe Salazar could join forces with her and they may be able to come up with something when he came back, she was getting desperate.
Helga watched her like a hawk and even got Rowena´s students to give her Intel!
Even being looked after and still getting letters from her husband thanks to her friends. She was miserable, it was sadness and anger and something she couldn't quite put her finger on, but she was utterly devastated.
Something inside told her she won't ever lay eyes on Narnia ever again and she always trusted her instinct; it had helped to keep her alive before she had people to rely on.
As it turned out, no one could go to Narnia after Salazar crossed the portal. He was able to send her letters and little messages thanks to her diadem. But… he couldn't come back and she really couldn't try and go there.
Whispers and rumors made their way out of Hogwarts about a supposed falling out between Salazar Slytherin and the other founders. Years of resentment made the gossip be repeated and believed as if it was the absolute truth. It didn't matter how Helga tried and failed to contain it. Godric couldn't be bothered about answering something like that and Rowena had enough problems as it was.
Let them talk about things they didn't know about, she knew people said atrocious things of her, an apparently unwedded woman, with child.
None of the people outside of Hogwarts knew about Rilian and Narnia and she wanted to keep it that way, she had to protect Narnia and keeping its existence a secret was paramount, she really didn't care about other people. If they wanted to tarnish her reputation without reason, so be it.
Helga and Godric didn't take it lightly. Not in the slightest.
Helga handed out ferocious punishments to whoever was unfortunate enough to be caught talking about Rowena, and Godric challenged enough men to a duel that they soon stopped spreading such nonsense. They couldn't answer questions about Salazar´s whereabouts. They only confirmed he was healthy and safe.
…
Salazar has been gone for months on end; Rowena was almost ready to burst. Her belly got in the way most of the time; Helga hovered around like a mother hen whenever she could get away with it or sent a house elf to do it. And trust the students to go along with Helga and Godric without much persuasion.
She was relegated to her chambers inside Ravenclaws tower with books, tea and a never-ending supply of anything shed want to eat if she could muster the energy or will to do so.
She just wanted to see her husband and child again. William must be able to give faltering steps now, oh the mischief he´d manage to wreck on the castle. And sure, Rilian was bound to be after him whenever he had the time. Being a king wasn't easy after all. Even in a peaceful place like Narnia.
Oh how she missed them.
What's the object of giving her ambition, wit and drive if it will end up like this?
…
The nightmares keep waking her up. Everyone was convinced it was just her acting up and being spoilt at the beginning.
They tried everything, from punishments to doctors and… other measures as well. Growing up in any household aligned with tradition and bearing the last name Black was bound to be an experience you wouldn't forget. Even so, nothing worked. She kept having those nightmares all through her life and no threat made her stop. She didn't even know why she had those, seeing people and places she never knew playing in her mind again and again, blurry faces and unknown locations and an ever growing sense of being lost and also an urgency as if time was running out.
It was maddening, frustrating and confusing. She didn't have time for riddles.
Her whole life up until she met him had been a muggle roller-coaster, that's the closest she had to compare it. It was in a dull ball, as dull and mind-bogglingly boring as they came, she felt eyes on her since she arrived, judgmental eyes trying to pry into her every step to have something to nick pick and talk about for the rest of the evening. From the last of her hair to the tip of her toes, everything had to be perfect. Her hair was always done up in a complex hairdo her mother choose along with everything else. She wasn't fooled into believing these events where for the sake of their fun. The young generation had to concur to this kind of thing in order to be exposed and hence, sold to the highest bidder.
She was bored out of her mind trying and failing to give two shits about the whole thing while Cissy flocked everywhere since everyone wanted to talk with her about anything.
That's when she laid eyes on him. Powerful like no one she had ever laid eyes on. Something clicked and she knew she'd follow him to the end of the world, since he was the first ever individual to cause suck a reaction on her.
To bring such a spark of life in an otherwise dull world she wanted to take no part in.
…
Balancing everything she had to deal on her plate with her duties for being born a daughter of the Blacks. She hated it. It was fulfilling or satisfying in the slightest, being told since you were old enough to understand spoken English that you didn't have a choice in anything besides housekeeping and decoration and you were for sale. That could scar up anyone. And she wasn't any different.
She studied everything she could but her favorite subject was Defense Against the Dark Arts, not because she believed in all that nonsense about fighting Dark Arts, on the contrary, she loved to learn how other people might try and fend off the hexes or curses she threw and make a counterattack plan that they wouldn't see coming.
She also liked the Dueling Club; at least while she was a member. They threw her out. Something about her being too dangerous of an opponent and no one wants to duel her. Hogwarts was filled with judgmental people that thrived in their pack mentality and thought all of Slytherin was filled with the second coming of evil. That guaranteed a lot of hate being thrown on the snakes, things they didn't deserve. An opponent they couldn't fight because it was inside the head of everyone else. Their dislike of her house came from things they've made up in their heads about how Slytherin was like.
Maybe if it wasn't such a strongly enforced tradition to end up in Slytherin she might've liked being in Ravenclaw, not just for the reading, she felt curiosity about a lot of things and they encouraged learning through experimentation. She wanted to invent her own curses someday. What better place to do so than a whole tower filled with books no one else could access?
Oh she knew everything there was to know about Hogwarts before even stepping foot on it. Thanks to books, histories and even rumors amongst the oldest kids that attended the balls held by her family and others. She though it was cool that Slytherin was in the dungeons and that they were able to look at the bottom of the lake. But she wanted to get her hands on some of books stored in Ravenclaw Tower.
It was with big expectations she arrived at the castle and they didn't take long in deflating. Even if Hogwarts was better than her home, people hated her without reason.
Being sorted into Slytherin guaranteed you being ignored by the students on the other three houses; that if you were lucky enough to be forgettable. She didn't have it that easy. Nor Cissy, or any of them for that matter, they were Blacks and that carried a weight heavy enough to build you or destroy you.
If it came to resentment, she had enough to last her two lives, for her parents, for everyone who had mistreated her without a reason accountable to her directly. For all that was expected of her.
Her impending marriage hanged over her head like a silent curse, being relegated to have children felt like a slap on the face to all of her potential and an insult to all of the things she wanted to do with her live. Just be silent, open your legs, bear a child or two or as much as your husband wants and do whatever it is your husband desires of you. No questions asked. That was the path all pureblooded ladies had to walk and no one had bothered to correct such an atrocity.
Finally the Lestranges paid the highest price and she found herself engaged to Rodolphus Lestrange, all of that happening as while she was far away, looked up in her mind where no one could reach her.
A brilliant duelist, capable and intelligent, so much potential, that's what he said.
That man she meet at one of those unbearable balls turned out to be the champion of the purebloods and it was completely acceptable to cooperate with him.
And he helped her to get out of a life of misery and despair kowtowing to Rodolphus and his family.
He had requested… demanded that she had to be allowed to serve him as well.
Shed follow him all the way to a graveyard and dead if she had to. He was her savior.
Being able to let go of all restrain on the raids, she marveled on it. And that was the side he cherished of her, he told her so enough times as it was from the moment they met. How her potential would be wasted if she were to conform to being a housewife.
She could be as free and wild as she wished while she destroyed their enemies, the sworn enemies of blood purity and tradition. Two things that had so oppressed her in the past and now they handed her back her freedom as long as she was willing to kill those who opposed their cause.
As time passed by she found it easier to silence the voice at the back of her head that told her maybe this whole approach wasn't exactly the best. Those who died at her hand knew what it entailed to oppose Voldemort and his death eaters and she wasn't about to let them capture her or kill her. It was killing them or end up killed on any war, right?
Relentlessly she exerted her vengeance on the world that so far just scorned and belittled her. If to set things right she had to destroy everything she really didn't care.
He was beside her and was the designated champion of tradition. They couldn't be wrong.
That's why when she lost him and was thrown in Azkaban it all happened so quickly, she couldn't even believe it. All of her efforts where for nothing, she couldn't find him anywhere after that disastrous night, not even capturing and torturing aurors gave him insight on her lords whereabouts or what happened. She didn't believe someone as talented as her master was defeated by a damn brat!
Oh how she hated that damn baby. He had destroyed her perfect world in the blink of an eye. Oh, where was her master? He surely won't stand for their imprisonment.
In Azkaban her nightmares got even worse than they´d ever been. She couldn't control them anymore not even with oclumency; without access to potions or a wand her mind was held prisoner by years on end and she didn't really have anything to tell the time besides the warden dropping her meager rations every day.
She was trapped on memories of a long past life she couldn't even place, with blurry faces, halls and woods. Feeling broken and hopeless beyond anything she´d ever felt and she hated every minute of it.
Of not understanding what was happening or why it was happening. This wasn't "normal". These damn nightmares had gotten her the reputation of mental instability amongst her circle. An entire life consulting and searching how to stop them before they conquered her mind and she lost her judgment, this time for real and without hope of ever getting better. She had visited the ward in San Mungo destined to mental patients and she´d rather die than end up there.
A long night came to stay, until her master returned she might just bide her time letting herself be immersed in those images of a long forgotten past or some distant future she couldn't place.