XXX Chapter 2 Museum

If it hadn't been for Noah's military training, he's pretty sure he would have started crying when Mirage booted him from the Porche. He rolled several times on the dirty warehouse floor, the Poké Balls digging into his abdomen.

"Woohoo hoo!" Mirage said as (he?) (stood?) and (turned?) into a (robot?). "I've been cooped up forever!"

What exactly was Noah seeing right now?

"Mirage, stay hidden!" the robot announced as he walked around. "Mirage, don't draw attention to yourself! Big is just a movie—you'll never be real boy! But that was fun, man! You're fun!"

Noah tried not to cower away.

"Oh right, this is probably a lot for you," he said as he moved forward.

Noah instinctively grabbed the nearest thing—a pipe. "Back up."

"What's with the aggression? I thought after the car chase we were boys!" he said, emphasizing 'boys' in a high-pitched voice as he spread his arms in a 'I've done nothing wrong manner.' "What, are you gonna hit me?"

"Maybe," Noah said. You just crashed two cops, dude.

"It's like that?" Mirage asked. The parts of his hand moved around and somehow formed what looked like a laser canon. He pointed the blue glow right at Noah.

Noah felt like Mirage wasn't really serious about shooting him. His life couldn't end so tragically or pathetically, right?

"Tough guy, eh?" Mirage asked. "I like that a lot," he complimented.

"What are you?" Noah demanded. "Are you a possessed car? Like Christine or something?"

Mirage waved a hand in a gesture that was so human Noah almost couldn't believe it. "Christine? No, Christine is more like the Decepticons. I'm an alien. An Autobot."

That was what the voice from the radio said—Autobots. Noah was more likely to believe in a possessed car than somebody from space. "Like ET?"

"You mean the ugly guy in the basket? Look at this face! Come on!" Mirage held out his fist. "The name's Mirage."

Noah didn't want to tap Mirage's hand. Noah wanted to collect Delcatty and crawl into bed and forget that he ever met an alien Christine. As far as he knew, this was a dream anyways. Couldn't be real.

"Give me a little tap!" Mirage compelled, bringing Noah out of his denial.

Noah felt like he might be in trouble if he didn't reciprocate. Gingerly, he touched the robot's fist with his own. Mirage's hand felt exactly like the metal on a car. He was good at disguising himself.

"Now we're friends!" Mirage announced.

Noah heard the sound of car engines coming closer. Mirage's attention shifted to the door. "Oh great. The gang's here."

"There are more like you?" Noah asked automatically.

"Like me? No, no, no. Be cool so they don't do anything to you."

"What?!"

"I'd get rid of that pipe if I were you."

To Noah's disbelief, he was met with more cars that turned into robots. A large truck, a yellow Camaro, and a pink motorcycle rolled in and flanked him.

"Mirage, what have you done?" the pink motorcycle asked as she flipped into her robot form. At least, Noah was pretty sure the motorcycle was a she. But could robots have genders?

When the large truck transformed into his robot mode, that was when Noah felt the most anxiety. It was one thing to meet Mirage, it was another to be looking at a building-sized robot who made him feel like an ant. All Noah could do was gawk. His hand went instinctively to his belt, but no way was he going to bring Pikachu or Umbreon out to try to defend himself. If something happened to him, at least the Poké Balls could be recovered later.

"Optimus, hey! You look good!" Mirage said, trying to appease the large robot. "Are those new rims?"

"You were told to stay hidden," Optimus declared in a voice that boomed.

"Yeah, so funny story. When you called, he was already in the car, but he's cool, so it's cool, right?"

"No," he stated blankly. Noah heard some releases of air as the huge robot bent down to actually pick him up! He retracted his face mask. "Who are you, human?"

Noah's mouth reacted without his permission, "I'm nobody. I didn't see nothin'. I'm not even seeing anything right now."

The big robot was not convinced. "Arcee?"

The pink robot made her way over and scanned him. "Private Noah Diaz. U.S. Army. Multiple commendations. A wizard with electronics… He's a soldier," she said like it was hard to believe.

"He does not look like one," the big guy said.

What does a soldier look like? Noah thought. We're all just people before we're made into soldiers. "You're lookin' pretty rough yourself," he commented.

Mirage stifled a laugh. Optimus promised that he would deal with Mirage's mistake later and put Noah down. Noah looked down at his belt. Optimus hadn't crushed the Poké Balls, thank goodness.

Arcee got back to business. She said something about energy readings and finding something they were looking for.

"I can't believe it. The Transwarp Key is here," Optimus announced. "After seven years on Earth, we've finally found a way home."

Noah barely understood what the big robot was saying, but a way home for these guys sounded perfectly fine to him. He didn't know how they got stuck here in the first place, and how nobody noticed, but he wasn't going to figure it out. He was ready for them to leave when Mirage suggested he help them bust into a museum. The others weren't too keen on the idea.

"It'll be great! He can walk through those little doors. Also, he has those creatures called Pokémon! He's got two right there! What you got, man?"

The other robots suddenly looked more interested.

"Um, I have a Pikachu and an Umbreon with me. I sent my Delcatty to—"

"—Yeah, he's got a Pikachu and an Umbreon!" Mirage said, cutting him off. He must not want the others to know about his shenanigans. "An electric and dark type—perfect!"

Noah thought about how much they could have known about Pokémon. Maybe they thought about using their abilities for their own gains. "I didn't say I agreed. I can't break into a museum for alien robots."

"Would you do it for friendship?" Mirage asked.

Noah didn't respond.

"Or, or, would you do it for cash? I'll make you a deal. You help us, and I'll let you sell me." The robot proceeded to change into multiple high-value cars.

It occurred to Noah that it wouldn't be okay to sell a car that would just drive off, but he also still needed money. A quick fifty grand was too much of an opportunity to miss.

"Yes!" Mirage yelled.

XX

Elena Wallace was not having a good time. She acquired a coveted position at a museum only to destroy one of their most valuable pieces. She accidentally busted the outer shell of the artifact that she was so curious about. Flashes of how much trouble she'd be in tortured her mind. What if the museum demanded she pay hundreds of thousands of dollars to compensate them? She'd never pay it off. Or what if they just sent her to prison?! Her heart rate skyrocketed. She'd never be able to deal with something like that.

Elena's hand went to her waist. With shaky hands, she cupped the Ultra Ball. It was so dark that the black ball almost disappeared into the darkness of the room. Elena pushed the middle button and the tiny ball became bigger. "Kirlia, I choose you."

In a flash of light, a green and white Pokémon appeared with a pirouette. "Kirlia!"

"Kirlia, I need your help. You see this artifact?" she asked, pointing at it. "I tried to see what it was and then I accidentally broke it. Can you put the pieces back together?" she asked hesitantly.

"Kirlia," the Pokémon replied. Kirlie focused on the artifact. She brought the glowing pieces together using her psychic powers, but they would not reconnect. "Kirlia!" she announced.

"It's not part of the artifact, you say?" Elena asked with her lip turned up. "The artifact is that inward part?"

"Kirlia!" she confirmed.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Kirlia," the Pokémon said as she moved closer. "Kirlia…" she whispered.

"That's great, but I don't know what I'm supposed to tell the museum. What I did wasn't exactly standard procedure."

Kirlia immediately hugged her trainer. Elena patted her back. "Thanks, Kirlia, but I don't know how I'm going to get out of this one."

XX

Noah stood outside the museum, wondering what his life had come to. How did he go from job hunting to stealing a Porsche to stealing for an alien race in a day? Deciding to steal from a museum was much different from stealing from a garage. With the car, he was taking from one rich guy. With the museum, he was taking from a bunch of rich guys who would probably want their stuff back. It also meant that there would probably be some Pokémon patrolling the museum at night.

But if it meant sending these aliens home and getting them away from Earth, it was plenty worth it.

Mirage encouraged him a snarky smile and a swing of his hand when he dropped him off. Noah was ready, but it was also time to ask for help. He reached for his Poké Balls and kissed them for good luck before calling for them out.

The yellow mouse and black and gold eeveelution announced themselves as they exited the Poké Balls and looked around. Then they backed up in shock when they saw the robot.

Noah raised his hands in an 'it's okay' gesture. "Whoa, whoa. It's fine. Everything's fine, you guys. This is Mirage. As it turns out, aliens exist. Who knew," he said, snickering a bit.

Mirage gave a little wave to the Pokémon. "It's okay, little guys. I'm a friend."

The Pokémon gawked for another second before running next to Noah.

Noah scratched their ears. "It's alright, Umbreon, Pikachu. I promise. This is weird, but we have a mission right now. Do you see that museum right there?"

Their heads snapped to the museum, and then they made an affirmative noise.

"Well, there's an artifact in there that this big guy needs to use in order to get off of Earth."

Umbreon made a noise.

Noah rubbed the back of his head as a he searched for a way to summarize the situation. "Well, we met in a garage. He can turn into a Porsche, and I was trying to steal the Porsche for cash, and then we got into a police chase," he babbled. "That's why Delcatty's not here right now, by the way. She had to go help one of the cops, and… it's a long story."

Noah held his breath but Umbreon and Pikachu didn't look disappointed in him, thank goodness. He could always count on his Pokémon to trust and support his judgement.

Noah put his hands together. "What we need to do right now is get into that museum, get the artifact, and get out," he said, jabbing with his thumb. "Can you do that for me?"

Umbreon nodded solemnly. Pikachu pumped a fist. "Pika!"

Mirage looked terribly amused. "Hey, I didn't tell you this before, but Earth is the only planet I know of with sentient and half-sentient beings, and it blows my mind how you can understand those little guys."

"It can take some time to figure out what they're saying." Noah responded. "So, you guys don't have pocket monsters of your own?"

Mirage laughed. "No! If we did, it might have made the war a little easier."

"War?" Noah asked.

"Oh, just a civil war between the Autobots and Decepticons," Mirage stated nonchalantly. "Long story short, the Autobots are the good guys and the Decepticons are the bad guys, and they want to take over the universe. The Autobots are there to stop them."

Noah pursed his lips. He didn't know if he could trust Mirage or not, but if they were engaged in some kind of war, that meant he had to get them off of Earth all the faster.

Noah leaned in and whispered, "Yeah, about that, Mirage, if you're a good guy, I would appreciate it if you would be more careful with people's lives. Those cops were just doing their jobs."

Mirage looked like a kid who just got chided. "Sorry, Noah. Sometimes you can't gently get people off your tail."

"I know, but they have families waiting for them. Like us."

Mirage let out an intake of air. "I get it. I'll be more careful in the future. If it makes you feel better, all of those cops survived. I already looked up police records to see what they had to say about the Porsche chase. They said that a Delcatty was reported healing one officer, and a Blissey arrived in time to take care of the one that smashed himself into those water barrels," he finished with a chuckle.

Noah felt sweet relief. "Oh, thank goodness."

"Yeah! Anyways, you better go now. The other 'bots don't like to chat as much as I do."

Noah nodded apprehensively and ran to the museum with his Pokémon right beside him.

XXX

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