One-Shot: The One Where The Bings Bump Into Richard
It was a late autumnal evening, walking through the city.
Hand in hand, Chandler and Monica Bing were taking their teenaged twins, Jack and Erica, on a tour of the sights, pointing out their former haunts.
"And here….. is where Mommy and Daddy used to live before we were married!" Chandler pointed out, gesturing to the old apartment building on Bedford Street.
"And after we were married, honey, don't forget," Monica reminded her husband, who now sighed and rubbed at his temple, bemoaning the loss of memory that comes with age. "Three whole years we were there, before the kids!" Tucking her son, Jack, into her side, she gave him a one-armed squeeze. "We brought you and your sister home to that apartment!"
"Really?" Jack half-laughed.
"Yup, you two lived there for an entire week," Chandler quipped. "Along with us, Uncle Ross, Aunt Rachel, Aunt Phoebe and Uncle Mike, Uncle Joey…."
Jack appeared genuinely intrigued. "What was your room number?"
"Apartment 20," Chandler and Monica both sighed almost dreamily, reminiscing while giving each other sappy looks. At the bemused stares of their children, Chandler cleared his throat. "Well…. first I lived across the hall from your mother, in Apartment 19, with Uncle Joey."
"You were neighbors?" Erica clapped her hands, enraptured. "That's actually really cute!" The little family moved on down the sidewalk, the Bings' daughter humming something halfway under her breath.
"Notice me, Chandler, put down the….. something…. This is your next-door neighbor calling…."
"Erica, what are you signing?" Chandler studied his daughter.
"Seussical. Aunt Phoebe taught it to me."
"Wasn't that from the play we went to see your godfather in?" Monica mused.
"You mean the one where Joey was an elephant and sat on his ass throughout the entire second act?" Chandler quipped sarcastically. "Oh, it was riveting!"
Monica side-eyed her husband, amused. "You enjoyed it!..." she teased him.
A beat, and then Chandler smirked. "Actually, yeah, it was sort of funny…. For Joey…."
The family of four drew up to Central Perk. "Man, the old coffee place still looks the same," Jack mused.
"I used to take you here when you were babies!" Monica gushed with a wistful sigh. "Even after we moved, I'd come back and push your little double stroller in…."
"Did you miss the coffee or the people?" Jack wanted to know.
Sending a meaningful look at each other, Monica nodded to Chandler. "Both," she stated quietly. Chandler had to agree.
"Well, I'll be…. Monica?"
Monica spun around and her jaw dropped upon seeing…. "Richard…."
Richard Burke had gathered some grey in his hair and beard since the last time she had seen him, her old flame. His eyes were still crinkly, and there was now a sparkle of familiarity there, but there was no hunger in his gaze the way she had once known. Even so, Monica found herself blushing. She chanced a look at her husband, who had stiffened but was trying to hide it from the kids.
"Fancy seeing you here!" Richard grinned. Just then, a woman sidled out from behind him, and he slung his arm around her. Chandler deflated, but only slightly. Oh, thank God….. that had better be his wife and not just his girlfriend….
Chandler jerked sharply as Richard's eyes now scanned and landed on him. "And here's Chandler! How ya doing, you old son of a gun?!"
Chandler grinned weakly, accepting the handshake. "Oh, I keep moving, Richard…."
"Oh, are you one of Mom and Dad's old friends?" Jack craned his neck over his mother to address the older gentleman.
At this, Richard's eyes brightened with genuine thrill. His gaze landed on Monica. "Well, well, well….. looks like you finally got everything you ever wanted…."
Monica grinned softly. "I did." Next to her, Chandler had stiffened again. There was an awkward silence in which Mrs. Bing pursed her lips. "Um…. well, Richard, it was lovely to see you again. Guys, why don't we head over to the park across the street?"
"But I thought we were ordering?" Jack whined.
"We can get lattes later…."
"No, of course, I won't keep you," Richard smiled. "However, if I could borrow Chandler for a moment?"
Chandler ignored how his son and daughter were giving him curious looks, in favor of giving them his best easy smile. "You guys go on ahead; I'll catch up."
Grinning tenderly, Monica leaned in and pecked him chastely on the lips. "Don't be too long…." Then, arm in arm with her daughter, and Jack trailing behind, the Bings left the café.
Chandler turned to face Richard, while taking a deep, internal, cleansing breath. He hadn't seen his wife's old lover in years, not since….
Richard was smiling at him in a manner Chandler couldn't quite discern. He quickly scanned to find any kind of duplicitousness or ulterior motive in the older man's expression, and was quite shocked when he found none.
"Look, I know that there's a history with all of us…."
Richard cut him off. "Chandler, I'm proud of you."
Chandler blinked, certain he had misheard. "Huh?"
Richard shrugged, glancing back in the direction where Monica and the twins had gone. "It just goes to show you that things worked out the way they were meant to…"
Chandler slowly nodded in agreement, still stunned. "Yeah."
Richard pursed his lips in an aged grin. "Those kids look just like you." Chandler was shocked to find himself turning pink at the praise, even puffing out his chest with pride.
"You know, I'll take that as a compliment…."
"I mean it," Richard insisted it.
A beat, and then Chandler decided to extend an olive branch of sorts. "Well, would you… believe me if I told you that they're actually adopted?"
"No…." Richard's eyes widened, looking like he didn't believe him. "Are they really?... I never would have guessed! You're joking!..."
Chandler broke out into an actually comfortable laugh. "I'm not!" Another beat, in which he feared that perhaps he had said too much. "Mon and I…. well, we couldn't conceive and so we…." He turned red, knowing that he wouldn't be so explicit in the presence of his wife and kids. Jack and Erica knew they were adopted, of course, and Monica had long ago come to an acceptance of her infertility with grace. It didn't change how they were still a family.
Richard just nodded in understanding. "I'm sorry." Chandler nodded. "For what it's worth, I knew that Monica would find any way to become a parent….." He paused. "Well, short of doing anything illegal…."
Chandler chuckled. "No, I'm pretty sure my wife wouldn't have been that desperate enough to snatch a baby out of a supermarket!" Both men laughed. Another lull. Chandler finally stuck out his hand for Richard to shake; surprised, Richard took it.
"Well, you're doing a wonderful job," Richard told him.
"Thanks, Richard. I'll…. Um, see you around?"
Richard nodded. "You guys still in the city?"
"No, we've been in the suburbs for….. well, for about as long as Jack and Erica can remember."
"How nice." Richard nodded one more time. "You take care, Chandler."
Chandler nodded back. Then he slipped from the old coffee haunt. The sun had just about completely set by the time he crossed the street and slipped into the little park. He found his wife, son and daughter waiting for him on a nearby bench, from which Monica now rose, biting her lip anxiously.
He disarmed her, relaxed her, with his easy, charming grin. "Well, that was the nicest conversation I've ever had with the guy!"
Monica stared at him, lips breaking out into a beaming smile of relief. "Really?"
"Yeah….!" Chandler laughed, hugging her.
Jack threw up his hands. "Will someone please explain to me what's going on?!"
Still at rest in her husband's arms, Monica turned back to her son, biting her lip. "Well….. um…. that guy we met in there? Before I fell in love with and married your daddy…. He….. Mommy used to date him…."
Jack gawked. "The Santa Clause dude rocking the leather jacket, just now?" Wincing, Monica nodded. Jack's entire face collapsed in disgust, followed quickly by Erica. "Oh, Mom! …. No! Just….. just no!"
Chandler couldn't help it: he burst into laughter. Monica smiled sheepishly. "I know it sounds a little funny, huh?"
"Funny? How about we go with creepy?" Jack countered. "The guy looked like he just wandered off the set of an AAG commercial!"
"Or an NRA spot," Erica quipped. She now threw her voice into a bass register. "You'll have to pry it from my cold, dead hands!"
"No, honey, that was Charleston Heston…." Chandler chuckled, slinging his free arm around his daughter while keeping the other at his wife's waist. The Bing family then walked off into the twilight of the city park, a traumatized Jack bringing up the rear.
