AN: Buckle up ladies, gentlemen and every other gender in-between, we finally go back to Steven as he reaches Serpentes and comes face to face with King Cobralan, who I argue might be just as much Steven's opposite as Black Rutile was. Though unlike Black Rutile who wears how much of a sociopath she is on her sleeve and is not ashamed to show it, Cobralan is a pretty okay guy who has a very strange view on morality where anyone who doesn't like what he does can take a hike unless he can convince them otherwise. The Jormagundr royal family will all be very interesting characters for me to write, so I don't want to waste your time any longer.
Synopsis: Steven, Connie, Greg, Black Rutile, and Ronaldo finally reach Serpentes, where Steven is welcomed by the royal family.
Cast:
Zach Callison as Steven
Noël Wells as Black Rutile
Estelle as Garnet
Michaela Dietz as Amethyst
Deedee Magno-Hall as Pearl, The Black Pearl Brigade
Jennifer Paz as Lapis
Shelby Rabara as Peridot
Uzo Aduba as Bismuth
Kimberly Brooks as Jasper
Lauren Ash as White Topaz
Grace Rolek as Connie
Tom Scharpling as Greg
Zach Steel as Ronaldo
Aurelio Voltaire as King Cobralan Jormagundr
Shirley Millner as Queen Constricta Jormagundr
Jason Marsden as Prince Nosiop Jormagundr
Cissy Jones as Princess Naja Jormagundr
Henry Rollins as Captain Boa
Keith David as Pyth
Neil Flynn as Aescul
Patti LuPone as Yellow Diamond
Lisa Hannigan as Blue Diamond
Christine Ebersole as White Diamond
John Moschitta Jr. as Bialyoom Milamin
Stephanie Escajeda as Meinerr
Nicole Sullivan as Sylvia Spectre
Kari Wahlgren as Envyrno
Featuring JP Karliak as S-L1M3
Dominic Armato as Captain Gearfeet
Wally Wingert as Rigby Starglow
Britt Baron as Michelle Angelon
Julissa Aguirre as Lady Imagineer
Rob Paulsen as Monty the Moarchean
Steven Blum as Deputy Edward
Beau Billingslea as Sheriff Spiegel
Christopher Lloyd as Batsputin Vosania
Anna Akana as Dionna of the Sands
Peter Stormare as Reximillian
Elizabeth Maxwell as Vigrid
James Earl Jones as Wobbla the Butt
Barrett Wilbert Weed as Ezlipsia
And Anthony Stewart Head as Solaris Noctua
Steven Universe: Snake Eyes
Chapter 3: Here Comes a New Challenger
"Well, here we are on the Slytherophidian home planet of Serpentes!" Aescul exclaimed as his ship returned home at last and landed in Alethinophidia. "Ah, it's good to be back home after so many years. Now watch your step as you get out, everybody."
"Wow, I haven't been on an alien planet in this long." Connie gasped in amazement as she took in the sights and sounds of Serpentes. "This is the place where they took the Gems, right?"
"Seems like it," Steven answered as he followed Connie out of Aescul's ship. "I thought Ronaldo was just talking crazy when he said the Slytherophidians existed, but I never realized they were real all along."
"Finally!" Ronaldo cried as he burst from the spaceship and began harassing Slytherophidians for their knowledge. "Excuse me, sir, do you have any holidays you celebrate on your planet?" The snake awkwardly slithered away in response. "Okay, I'll ask you later." Ronaldo then walked over to another snake. "What kind of food do you eat here?" The snake slithered away as well. "Hm, tough crowd."
"Okay big guy, now that we're here, I think it's about time we see your boss," Greg said to Aescul as the two walked out of Aescul's ship. "The Crystal Gems are getting us real worried, and I do not want to see any of them losing a head or two. Then again, they can just walk it off."
"Don't worry, everyone will know he's here," Aescul assured Greg as Steven quickly became surrounded by Slytherophidians wanting to meet him. "See what I mean?"
"Uh, hello everybody." Steven nervously said to the Slytherophidians surrounding him. "My name's Steven Universe. Nice to meet you all."
"Oh my gosh, it's Steven!" a young female Slytherophidian squealed eagerly. "Sign my face, please!"
"Hey now, no need to get too obsessed over me, I'm just here to get my friends back." Steven laughed. "The last time I discovered my fans, they chased me all around the country."
"Is that Steven Universe I see?!" Pyth asked as he arrived on the scene and gently pushed his king's subjects out of the way. "Greetings my boy, I am the royal advisor Pyth and I'm here on behalf of his royal highness Cobralan Jormagundr to collect you and bring you to him. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to fight for survival in the Ouraborium if you want your friends back."
"Wait, fight for survival? You mean you want me to kill people in this world?" Steven gasped in surprise before being wrapped in Pyth's tail and taken away.
"Unfortunately for you, yes," Pyth explained. "More will be revealed once you meet our ruler." He then turned to look back at Greg, Connie, Ronaldo, and Lion. "And take those four along with him and throw them with the other competitors."
"Wait, you want us to fight too?" Greg asked before the three humans were seized by the royal guards. "But we're just puny, squishy Earthlings, we'll all die in there!"
"That's the idea," Pyth replied with a villainous sneer as he turned back to Steven, who was looking at him with a face full of worry and suspicion.
"Looks like our new arrival is gathering quite a crowd." King Cobralan said as he watched the commotion with Captain Boa from above. "As expected for the legendary Steven Universe."
"My enforcers tell me that Pyth should be here momentarily with Mr. Universe." Boa calmly stated. "Plus, his plus-ones shall be sentenced to the Ouraborium until further notice."
"All I needed to hear, Captain. You are dismissed." Cobralan stated and commanded Boa to leave before taking a glass of Slytherophidian alcohol and taking a sip before Steven was escorted into his quarters. "Steven Universe, we meet at last! Apologies for the way I had to get your attention, but I know you love those Gems so much!"
"Enough with the pleasantries, just give me my friends back and leave my planet alone!" Steven abruptly yelled at Cobralan, shocking the king of the snake people at how curt his guest was.
"Wow, I'd thought you'd be way nicer than that," Cobralan said before offering his drinking glass to Steven. "You look stressed. Care for a drink? Finest snake oil on the planet, aged to perfection."
"Sorry, I'm not a drinker." Steven turned down the offer. "I just want to get in, get my friends back, and get out. That's all I want."
"All you want?" Cobralan asked before sitting Steven down at a bar and ordering his servant to pour another glass of snake oil. "Well, what are you willing to do for it?"
"What do I want to do for it?" Steven muttered before he heard music playing. "Wait, are you going to do what I think you're doing?"
"Right here, right now, come on, just hear me out. I don't wanna strike you down, I hope you come in peace." Cobralan began singing to convince Steven. "You fight for me, and I'll set your friends free. Out of the carnage and the violence they're trapped in." The bartender serving as the king's backup passed Steven a glass of snake oil. "Just trade your life so peaceful, for something more colorful. If you think it's crazy, well sometimes, crazy works. You can play it normal, you king of traditional. Or you can risk your life and see!"
"Don't you want to get away, from the boring life you live every day? Because I have just what you need, so come with me and you shall see!" Cobralan exclaimed as he slithered on the walls and spun around a flagpole. "All you need to do is fight for me! I'll let you do as you do, or you can do it like me. Fight in my games and I'll surely give you the key. Oh dang, the audience will be filled with glee! All you have to do is fight for me!"
"Thank you, but no, I don't want in on your show. I hate to tell you, but I'm not the killing type." Steven objected to Cobralan's offer while pushing the glass away. "Thank you, but no, just let all of my friends go. I don't want to slaughter just for the hype. I'm not sure if I like you, and this whole show you do. Without violence, you're nothing. Yes, you're nothing." Cobralan wasn't sure if he should be offended by the remark or impressed at Steven's audacity. "But I just want to live in peace, and not covered in grease. What would make me reconsider you?"
The servant quickly took the glass away as Steven continued singing. "Don't you think I'll be okay, with murdering innocents every day? I still got what I need, count me out of your crew. I would never fight for you!" Cobralan started nodding along to the song while banging the floor with his tail to the beat. "But you can still do as you do, just do not involve me. Just let my friends go, I don't even need a key! I am rubber and what you say won't stick to me like glue. What makes you think I'll fight for you?"
"Now, is this how you'd prefer to spend your days," Cobralan asked with a scaly arm on Steven's shoulder while Boa played the piano in the background. "With songs and ice cream and playing it safe?"
"If I were joining you, people would never let me live it down," Steven responded. "Disgraced and regretful, with a big ol' frown."
"But you'd finally see my point now, stop with that furrowed brow. Sometimes, fighting's the only thing we need." Cobralan replied while twisting Steven's mouth into a smile with his hands. "I'll finally wake you up, and stop your heart from breaking. Keep that little organ from aching." Putting his hands away, Cobralan turned around and stood back-to-back with Steven to await his answer. "Now, is my deal a little worth taking? I guess I'll leave it up to you."
"The answer is still no." Steven firmly declared, much to Cobralan's anger.
"No? NO?!" Cobralan asked, furious at the rejection while baring his fangs to intimidate Steven with. "I put on this whole song and dance number for you, and you still refuse?!" His face then perked up. "Oh wait, you must be joking! Well, don't make me laugh!"
"Your offer's intriguing, but I don't know how it would cost me." Steven began singing again. "I'll do whatever you want, just as long as you set everyone free."
"Oh, fair enough. I can free you from the action." Cobralan replied. "Just name your price, we can shake and make it happen."
"I wasn't born this morning, do whatever I think is fine." Steven declared while crossing his arms.
"Okay, just tell me already!" Cobralan urged his guest.
"Fine, I'll fight for you." Steven caved into Cobralan's requests, much to the snake king's delight.
"I knew you'd come through." Cobralan smiled happily before the two shook hands and became a duet.
"Don't you want to get away, from the boring life you live every day?" the half-Gem and the Slytherophidian king began singing in harmony. "Because I have just what you need, so come with me and you shall see! All you/I need to do is fight for me/you!"
"I'll let you do as you do, or you can do it like me." The two continued as the song reached a bombastic conclusion. "I have to fight for you! All I have to do is fight for you!"
"Wow, you're a surprisingly good singer," Steven said to Cobralan.
"Why thank you, I'm classically trained by my servants," Cobralan replied before summoning more guards with a clap of his hands. "Guards, bring Steven to his friends at the Ouraborium! And try not to be too rough on him, he's going through a lot right now."
"Okay guys, do your worst," Steven said as the snake guards took him away from Cobralan while he wondered just what went through the alien king cobra's head. He seemed nice on the surface, but he also forced species from across the stars to fight in his twisted gladiator games. Was Cobralan truly evil, or was Steven simply misunderstanding this new alien race and their morality? That would have to wait as Steven would soon be reunited with the Crystal Gems in time to fight in the Contest of Champions.
"Steven!" the Crystal Gems, Greg, Connie, and Ronaldo all cried out as Steven was thrown into the dungeon with the other competitors in the Contest of Champions, after which he was greeted with a big group hug.
"We're so glad you came for us!" Pearl exclaimed as she hugged Steven the tightest out of everybody in the dungeon.
"Yeah, really wish there was a better way to celebrate your birthday, little man." Amethyst laughed nervously before the hug dispersed.
"It's great that you came to rescue us, Steven," Garnet said with a smile before looking at Black Rutile, who was sulking in the background with her back against the wall. "Now what's she doing here?"
"Oh yeah, funny story," Steven said with a blush. "Black Rutile crashed on Earth at the same time I came back to Beach City because her team was abducted by the Slytherophidians, and now we've been forced to team up against a common enemy to save our friends."
"WHAT?!" the Gems all shouted in alarm at the idea that Steven would team up with someone like Black Rutile.
"Why are you so shocked? Half of you tried to kill him at some point in his life." Black Rutile deadpanned. "But yes, we had no choice but to align our interests to combat our new enemy and return everyone to Earth. Unfortunately," she shot Ronaldo a disdainful glare. "We picked up an unwanted passenger along the way."
"Hey, I volunteered on this adventure!" Ronaldo shouted, utterly offended.
"But in the meantime, while we wait for our turn to fight for our lives, allow me to introduce to you the other competitors." Black Rutile turned to face the many colorful characters forced to join the violence. "These are all the other individuals abducted by the royal family to fight in their games from across the universe. And I must say, this is a very stacked roster."
"Oh, saints be praised, I thought I was going to be dragged out to fight for a second!" a grasshopper-like alien gasped in delight as he skittered towards Steven to greet him. "Hello, my name's Monty! I'm a Moarchean from the planet Caelifera. Pleased to meet you, little one."
"Nice to meet you too," Steven replied to Monty while shaking his foreleg. "Who are the rest of these guys?"
"Oh, I believe we can help with that," Cap said before walking over to Sheriff Spiegel. "These are Sheriff Spiegel and Deputy Edward from Sergione-29."
"Howdy." Edward tipped his hat to Steven.
"These are Sylvia Spectre and Envyrno, who we fought before." Tails introduced the Coalition of Galaxies officer and the Magman mercenary next.
"Hello, Crystal Gems." Sylvia waved to the Gems, trying her best to keep a polite smile on her face.
"Oh great, their friends." Envyrno rolled her eyes.
"'Ello, I'm Rigby Starglow, I'm the biggest rock star in the universe." Rigby Starglow introduced himself with one flashy pose after another, making Greg think of the rock stars of his youth. "I got kidnapped here on my way to my next show."
"Call me Captain Gearfeet, mighty pirate and the third most feared pirate in the seven galaxies!" the cyborg Captain Gearfeet declared. "My crew and I accidentally raided a Slytherophidian ship, and I sacrificed myself to make sure they all got away."
"Call me Earthos, and the big guy above me is the Decimator," Earthos stated. "We fought your friends before you got here." The Decimator growled while nodding in agreement.
"You may call me S-L1M3." A cybernetic blob creature introduced himself. "My species has dedicated itself to self-improvement since the day we emerged from the primordial soup thanks to our advanced technology."
"I am Michelle Angelon." A figuratively and literally angelic-looking young woman with large white wings sprouting from her back added. "I am but a humble angel forced against my will to fight in such sinful battles while being separated from my home planet."
"And I'm Lady Imagineer." A jester-like humanoid stated as she took a break from her imaginary flute playing to meet Steven. "I can make your dreams into reality."
"They have abducted the Metals as well, but unfortunately, they're elsewhere in this arena." Black Rutile revealed just as Bialyoom and Meinerr entered the dungeon. "Oh, a servant. Let's make this quick, I don't tip the waiter."
"Ah, you-must-be-Steven-Universe!" Bialyoom greeted Steven. "It's-a-pleasure-to-meet-you-young-man. Here, my-card." He then lent his business card to Steven. "Here-in-this-arena, you'll-be-fighting-for-survival-against-a-variety-of-opponents-from-across-the-universe, and-your-reputation-means-everything-in-here-too."
"Hey, you kind of sound like that fast-talking guy from those old toy commercials." Greg pointed out Bialyoom's voice.
"Please, he's-nowhere-near-as-fast-as-I-am!" Bialyoom bragged.
"Now that you are here Steven, you will be pitted against your first opponent," Meinerr said while looking at her tablet. "And it shall be Miss Sylvia Spectre."
"Wait, me?!" Sylvia yelped in surprise as the guards grabbed her by the arms and dragged her away, while another pair did the same to Steven.
"Wait, I have to fight and kill people here?!" Steven cried before being separated from the Crystal Gems yet again.
"Them's the rules, my boy, whether you like it or not." Meinerr bluntly replied.
"And now ladies and gentlemen, the moment you've all been waiting for!" Naja announced to the excited fans of the Contest of Champions. "In this corner, all the way from planet Earth, is the one, the only, Steven Universe!" The audience began cheering as Steven was shoved out into the arena. "And in this corner, representing the Coalition of Galaxies, one of the last survivors of Invisibo-9, the illuminating invisible icon of justice, Sylvia Spectre!"
The crowd continued getting excited as Sylvia Spectre appeared from thin air, ready for a fight. "Now then, are you ready for some MORTAL COMBAT?!" Naja continued yelling, causing the crowd to cheer louder than ever. "That's what I like to hear! Heaven or hell, let's rock!"
As soon as the bell rang, Sylvia charged towards Steven and landed a furious punch to his face that sent him flying into a nearby wall. Although Steven was able to summon his shield to protect himself, Sylvia barely gave him any chances to fight back. "What's the big idea? I know we have no choice but to fight, but why are you so violent?!"
"It's because of you and your kind!" Sylvia declared while delivering a roundhouse kick to Steven's hip, causing the boy to fall over and run. "The Black Pearls may have taught me that you're not all bad and I took it to heart, even helping them a few times, but that doesn't mean I'll ever forgive you Diamonds for taking away my home and my family!"
"Oh, she just had to go there." Yellow Diamond groaned in disgust.
"Listen, I understand what you've been through, but revenge will only get you nowhere but down!" Steven said as he began throwing some punches of his own, but Sylvia was far faster. "Didn't the Black Pearls also teach you this?"
"Yes, but you think that simply forgiving the Diamonds and having them apologize will make everything better!" Sylvia said before trying to deliver a strong uppercut, but Steven dodged before her hit could connect. "And what's more, there are still Gems out there who refuse to accept what you've done!"
"Yeah, I know, I've dealt with them before!" Steven replied, utterly frustrated with Sylvia's anger before summoning his shield again and tossing it at her face. What he didn't realize however was that he was slowly starting to glow pink.
"And look at them, still running around because you think we should give peace to terrorists a chance!" Sylvia exclaimed, gesturing to Black Rutile and her rebels watching from afar, eager to see Steven be given the judgment he deserved and possibly killed too. "In my line of work, I've had to fight and defeat people who are no better than you are!"
"SHUT UP!" Steven burst into a pink-colored fit of rage and initiated a nonstop assault on Sylvia, managing to see right through her powers and attack every possible weakpoint she had. When Sylvia eventually lay beaten and bruised on the ground, Steven finally returned to his senses and realized what he had done before the audience started cheering.
"FINISH HER! FINISH HER! FINISH HER!" the crowd of Slytherophidians cheered as Steven looked around the arena at the audience urging him to land the killing blow. Although Sylvia was very harsh in her critiques of his worldview, Steven couldn't help but feel sorry for her because of how her prejudice was rooted in tragedy.
"No!" Steven firmly declared to the spectators. "I will never take a life for your amusement!" Everyone started gasping, and then they started booing Steven as he helped Sylvia up.
"Well, he's dead," Monty said flatly.
"Look, I'm sorry about what happened just now, it's just my powers that make me go crazy when I'm under extreme stress." Steven apologized to the Invisibon heroine. "I've been trying real hard to keep them under control, so please don't hold this against me."
"Wow, you really aren't anything like the Diamonds." Sylvia wheezed in surprise. "At least they're willing to admit their mistakes."
"Hey, hold on a minute," Steven said before he licked his hand and slapped his saliva-covered palm on Sylvia's injured wrist, making her cringe in disgust before the spit suddenly healed all her wounds. "There, all better!"
"You can do that?" Sylvia gasped in wonder at Steven's abilities. "Please, tell me more of what you can do!"
"I'll talk later." Steven replied. "But right now, I'm sure certain people have some choice words for me."
"WHAT-WERE-YOU-THINKING?!" Bialyoom shrieked angrily once Steven returned from his fight. "The-Crystal-Gems-sparing-their-opponents-was-embarassing-enough, but-you-had-the-power-to-kill-Sylvia-Spectre-right-then-and-there! There-are-three-ways-to-win. One, you-knock-your-opponent-out. Two, the-opponent-quits, and-shouts-'Uncle!' Three, you-kill-them-right-on-the-spot!"
"I know the rules, but you should know that Sylvia here lost her family years ago." Steven objected. "She was so lost and angry at Gems for destroying her home, that she decided to take her anger out on me even though she learned Gems aren't all bad."
"We're very proud of you for sticking to your morals, Steven." Blue Diamond sighed in relief, prompting Sylvia to give the Diamonds the stink-eye before Steven calmed her down.
"Oh, she's got a temper." White Diamond declared with a joking smirk.
"So what do we do now?" White Topaz asked. "Are we just gonna keep killing people until they let us go?"
"I guess we have no other choice." Yellow folded her arms in acceptance. "Steven, you tried convincing the king to let us go, correct?"
"Yeah, but he got really mad that I didn't like his way of thinking while we were singing together," Steven replied. "I just want to know what goes on in that head of his. Does he have some kind of generational trauma he doesn't want to talk about?"
"Steven, you know not everything can be solved by talking to people." Black Rutile crossly said to her archnemesis. "Oh forget it, I'm too good for all of you anyways." She then turned around and stormed off. "Call me when one of you dies looking like a total fool or something!"
"Are you sure she's teamed up with you to save us?" Blue asked Steven.
"I'm sure, but I can't help but feel she probably has some kind of ulterior motive," Steven replied as Black Rutile retreated into the shadows.
"What's taking everyone so long?" Cobralan muttered to himself while pacing around his throne room and looking at his watch. "They should've been here in time for the opening ceremonies, but they're running late!"
"Don't worry my darling, they never once refused to come to the Contest." Constricta tried easing her husband's worries. "Why should they do so now?"
"Your Majesty, the other Universal Lords are here." Captain Boa stated as he slithered into the room with Dionna of the Sands, Batsputin Vosania, Reximillian, Vigrid, Wobbla the Butt, Ezlipsia, and even the long-retired Solaris Noctua behind him.
"Sorry, we were so late, Cobralan." Solaris apologized on behalf of his former fellow Universal Lords. "Space traffic was an utter nightmare."
"We've heard word that you have captured a vast assortment of Gems to compete this year," Vigrid stated. "Could we perhaps get a look at them?"
"Wait a second everyone, you all just got here!" Cobralan laughed. "Why not stay a little and I can treat you all to lunch? You must be starving after the long trip here!"
"Well, I am awfully famished," Dionna replied while stroking her stomach. "What have you got to eat?"
"That reminds me, where is Nosiop right now?" Batsputin asked, trying to listen out for Nosiop with his massive ears.
"No dice, everyone." Constricta replied. "He's been missing ever since the games began."
"I'm sure he'll come up at some point." Wobbla said with a loud, disgusting laugh.
"Ugh, charming as always, Wobbla." Ezlipsia groaned in irritation while using her parasol to protect herself from Wobbla's gross bodily fluids.
"Oh come now, let's have some fun this year!" Reximillian exclaimed as the Universal Lords prepared to sit down to lunch. But little did they know that Nosiop was still involved with the Contest of Champions, and he was going to make his presence known in a big way.
"I could've had a worthy ally in Spectre, but of course, Steven had to mess everything up with his dumb talk-no-jutsu or whatever!" Black Rutile grumbled as she walked deeper into the arena, not realizing how far she had gotten until it was too late. "What the? Where am I?"
"You must be Black Rutile, correct?" the voice of Prince Nosiop asked for Black Rutile as he and Pyth emerged from the shadows.
"Of course I am," Black Rutile answered while cautiously drawing her bowie knife. "What's it to you?"
"We've heard you also desired to upend your people's current status quo and turn them into what you think they should be." Pyth declared with a sneer.
"Wouldn't you know it, I think the same way," Nosiop said as he took Black Rutile's hand. "Come with me. We need to talk."
Now that Steven and Black Rutile are finally on Serpentes, things can really get going as dark secrets of the Slytherophidians and their connections to the Gems are unveiled while the Crystal Gems fight for survival in the Contest of Champions. But what does Nosiop have planned for Black Rutile, you may ask? You'll have to find out next time on Steven Universe: Snake Eyes!
