The Loud sisters were pacing around Lisa's room after having the entire place launched into space by their Mask wearing baby Sister.
"Okay, okay. So Lily's wearing the Mask and she shot us into space!" Lori exclaimed, thinking deeply about how they were going to get back. "What do we do? Who knows what kind of insane bullshit she's gonna pull down there!"
"Relax Lori! I'll get us back easily!" Lola exclaimed, spinning around with a spacesuit and a jetpack.
"SPACE PRINCESS LOLA TO THE RESCUE!" She yelled as she started up her jetpack….and it swelled up and exploded, covering her in soot and tearing her suit.
"...Space…Princess Lola to the rescue!" Lola said again, grabbing another jetpack that also exploded the moment she put it on.
"...Space…Prince-"
*KABOOM*
"...Space."
*KRACKATOWA!*
Lola sat there on the floor burned and covered in soot with an annoyed look on her face as the scraps of her suit started to fall off her body.
"Okay…sooo anyone else got any Ideas?" Lola grumbled as Luan and Lori gave a curious look at the 4th wall and….
[*KICKS DOWN DOOR!*
Luan: Geo! Look, we need your help and…..uhhhhhh whose this?
Geo: Oh uhhhh This is Red…Yugi's out for a moment so Red's taking over for the time being.
Red: S'up hottie?
Luan: Uhhh hey…anyway so can you guys help us get back to Earth?
Red: Just grab the corner and pull.
Lori: Grab the corner and?...OH! I get it now, okay thanks guys!
Geo: Hey, fix that door while you're at it!
Luan: Nah don't feel like it!
*Lori sits the door back up*]
"Alright guys, Luan and I found us a way back home!" She exclaimed
"Really? How?"
"Like this." Luan said as she grabbed the top corner of the screen and pulled with all her cartoon might, tearing off the giant curtain and revealing that they were now in the living room.
"...Huh, didn't think of that one" Lisa muttered as they saw Lily on the couch drinking a Jack Daniels and smoking a massive cigar while watching Girls Gone Wild: Baby edition.
"…"
"There are so many things wrong with this." Lucy said.
Lily gave a scowl and stood up. "So you've escaped the moon, eh? Well then, once I kill you, Lincoln will be stuck with his REAL sister!" She exclaimed as Lana frowned and pulled out a giant crossbow with a grizzly bear loaded into it.
[KIDS NEXT DOOR: B.E.A.R.H.U.G.G.A.H: Big Enormous Assault Rifle Hurls Ugly Grizzly Giving Agonising Hugs]
"GET THE MASK OFF OF HER, BOSKOV!" Lana shouted, firing the bear towards Lily who simply ducked as the bear flew out the window afterwards she jolted up and ran into the kitchen.
"EAT HOT PLASMA!" Lily shouted pushing the Oven into the living room and using it as a hot plasma tank.
"Get down!" Lori exclaimed as balls of molten plasma shot out at them forcing the sisters to jump into a closet. "Wow, it's surprisingly roomy in here." Leni said from behind the door.
"Ok we need a plan dudes, that mask is making her go crazy!" Luna exclaimed.
"Like us?" Leni asked as Luna sighed.
"I mean more crazy." Luna spoke.
"What if we put her to sleep?" Lucy suggested.
"Lucy, we are not killing her!" Lola snapped.
"…I meant make her fall asleep." Lucy clarified.
"Oh…Okay but how do we do THAT?" Lana asked.
"Ooh, I know! Just play that sleepy music that mom uses for her naps!" Leni said
"Alright but we need a plan to distract her, we just need to get in close!" Lynn exclaimed.
"Hey what are we whispering about?" Lily asked, popping up in between them all.
'AHHHHH!" That shouted as Lily snapped her fingers and trapped them all in cages suspended over Lava.
"AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA! ANY LAST WORDS!?" Lily taunted as Leni pulled out a bag of flour and threw it at her.
"...Really?" She said, completely unimpressed as she rubbed her eyes, only to stop when she realized they were no longer in the cage.
"Oh….I see what you did there." She spoke with an irritated glare before kicking the door open and exiting the closet. "Alright, sluts. Get out here and face me like a man!" Lily roared, morphing her hands into machine guns and opening fire at the living room all while Lori and the others hid under the couch.
"Okay so does anyone have any plans?" Lynn hissed as bullets whizzed by.
"I say we totally appease her with a human sacrifice." Leni said cheerfully.
Lori and the others gave Leni a WTF look as Luan sighed. "No, I say we find a way to get the mask off of Lily's face! But how?"
"W-"
"If you say human sacrifice again, we're shoving you out to her." Lucy spoke with an irritated growl.
"Hmmmmm." Lori mused until she gained an idea. "I got it! But we need a distraction."
"I got this!" Leni said while grabbing Luna and pulling her out with her.
"Hey, Lily!" The baby then turned around to see Leni standing next to Luna, who was currently tied to a rotating piece of metal over a large open flame.
"SACRIFICE! SACRIFICE!"
"Whoa whoa, Leni, where'd you get a rotisserie spit?"
"Trust me, Luna, it's for the good of the family! BARBEQUE-I mean SACRIFICE!" Leni chanted, barely hiding the fork and knife in her hands.
"...seriously?" Lily snarked as she snapped her fingers and trapped all of them inside another cage.
"Now then, if you're all done being morons, I hope you're ready to die!" She exclaimed with a wicked smile…until Leni threw another bag at her, covering the baby in white powder. "YOU ALREADY DID THAT!"
"No, I didn't." Leni smirked as Lily began to scratch her chin. "Ugh! What did you do to me!?" She growled before snatching the bag of flour…and realizing the word flour was taped on.
"What the hell?" Lily grumbled as she ripped off the label and saw the words 'itching powder' written on it.
"You sneaky little REEEEEEEE…. Can't say that word anymore. PUT US ON AO3, YOU FUCKERS!" She screamed, shattering all glass in the room as she scratched herself raw.
"URRRRRRRRRRGGGGHHHH I FUCKING HATE ALL OF YOU!" Lily roared, shaking the entire house as she yanked off the mask to scratch under it, only to go wide-eyed as she realized what she just did.
"Uh oh!" Lily squeaked as Lisa ran over and grabbed the mask. "GOT IT!" She screamed as Lily literally exploded into green confetti, leaving a crying normal baby on the floor.
"HAHAHA YES! WE DID IT WE BEAT LILY!" Lynn shouted. Unfortunately…
"YOU GUYS DID WHAT!?" Lincoln snapped, coming downstairs and seeing that the entire living room was a wreck and Lily was on the floor crying. "Whoa whoa whoa, I didn't mean like that!" Lynn said, realizing just how messed up her words were out of context.
Lincoln marched up to his sisters and picked up Liku in his arms. "Shhh Shhh it's okay Lily, Lincy's here. I can't believe you guys actually hurt Lily! I'm telling Mom and Dad when they get home from work!"
"I said I didn't mean it like that!" Lynn exclaimed as Lincoln ignored her and went back upstairs, however what he didn't see was Lily giving her sisters the bird behind his back.
'That little bitch.' They all thought. "I'll start intercepting his phone in case he decides to tell them electronically." Lisa said
"But Lisa even if he does call mom and dad and you stop the phone call, he'll still tell them when they get back!" Lana said. "We could give him amnesia." Lynn suggested.
"And how would we do that?" Lori asked as Lynn gave a chuckle.
"Oh just leave THAT to me!" She smirked, holding up a sledgehammer.
"Lynn! A sledgehammer's gonna do too much damage to him. Here, use this frying pan instead." Leni said, handing her sister a frying pan all while Lucy took both of them. "No! We are NOT hurting him! What we need to do is bribe him"
"…and THEN give him amnesia!" Lola said with a smile.
The majority of the sisters then collectively facepalmed.
"No Lola, I was thinking if one or more of us seduced him! If we offer our bodies he might change his mind!" Lucy suggested.
"Would that even work, though?" Luna asked.
'It's our only choice but the issue is who to send?"
"Hmm…letMs draw straws. And I mean regular straws, no toon bull this time around." Lori said, giving Luna the stink eye. "Hey, what did I do!?" The rocker snapped.
"You know what you did in the scrapped version, author's favorite. Now." Lori cleared her through and threw her hand into the kitchen with a string attached to the end, and as soon as she felt it tighten she yanked the rope, bringing her hand back with a pair of scissors and a handful of paper straws.
"Alright." Lori then started cutting at random before grabbing a handful. "Now everyone pick a straw." She said as Luna smugly went first and pulled a two inch straw. "Alright, not that bad." She said as Lucy went next, pulling out a 7 inch straw. "Aand I jinxed myself, didn't I?"
Lola and Lana then went next, pulling out 3 and 4 inch straws respectively. Lisa pulled out a 4 inch straw, fist pumping as she did so, leaving Lori to close her eyes and pull a random one that was 6 inches long as Lynn pulled out another 5 inch straw. "Only two left." She teased as she shook her hand in front of Leni and Luan, who looked at each other and gulped. 'Let's just get this over with.' Luan thought as she and Leni closed their eyes and pulled together, making everyone gasp. Luan had pulled out an 8 inch straw, while Leni…had also pulled out an 8 inch straw.
"…"
"Well what the fuck do we do now?!" Lynn scowled angrily as Leni and Lynn just looked at their straws.
"How did you manage to leave two straws uncut?!" Lola exclaimed, very much pissed off.
"I don't know? Luck?" Leni spoke innocently as Lola held back the urge to beat her over the head.
"POINT IS!...Leni and Luan go upstairs and try to seduce Lincoln and maybe calm him down!" Lori said, crossing her arms while pouting jealously at the two girls' victory.
"YES! Let's have some fun, Leni!" Luan exclaimed as she and Leni were about to run upstairs until-
(Geo: HOLD IT BOTH OF YOU!)
SKIIIIIIIIIIRCHK!
"Oh, for fucks' sake, WHAT NOW?!" Leni yelled angrily.
(Geo: Yeeeeeaaaah ya see…..gonna have to end this chapter on a cliffhanger. Budget cuts ya know? The producer wants us to move on so..)
"YOU ARE THE PRODUCER YOU FAT FUCK!" Lola screeched.
(Geo: Says the 6 year old girl with a literal donkey ass for a face)
"I DO NOT HAVE AN ASS FOR A FACE!" Lola screamed unaware that her face was now the ass of a donkey, complete with a tail hanging from her forehead.
(Geo: Point is yeah sorry girls no lemons for you this time)
"But…But…that's not fair! Ya gotta let us do it now!" Leni frowned.
(Geo: Nah, don't feel like it…)
"Luna, quick! Show him your plank chest!" Lynn suggested.
"Good i-HEY!"
(Geo: Yeah no that ain't gonna work on me..)
Hearing this caused Luan to scowl. "What about the other guy? Let us talk to him to keep going!"
(Geo: Yeah…he kinda had to go to work, sooooo…see ya, whores!)
"Come on!"
(Geo: Nah, I don't feel like it.)
"FUCK YOU! YOU CAN'T JUST END US ON A CUT TO BLACK LIKE THE FUCKING SOPRAN-
(Geo:…We'll get back to this at a later date)
