It was the wee hours of the morning when he finally left her room, and it was a near thing that he did. They had been so comfortable basking in the afterglow together, so comfortable in each other's arms, that he really could have stayed. He wanted to. But their fireplaces were not connected yet, and he could hardly cause her the shame of other students noticing him making a hasty retreat in the morning.
As it was, she helped him straighten out his clothes, and peppered his face with kisses before he left, and he found himself practically skipping down the halls, replaying moments in his mind.
His heart felt like elastic, stretched further than he would have thought possible by the events of the evening.
He'd hoped at best for a conversation, a natural setting in which they could get to know each other, and maybe another kiss like the one they had shared the night before. He hadn't expected such reception, such tenderness, such reciprocated attraction and such electricity to pass between them.
It was with a start that he realized he was smiling.
He couldn't remember the last time he had spontaneously smiled. He caught his reflection in a suit of armour and examined it more closely.
His teeth were crooked and his nose too large, his lips thin and pale. He'd been rejected by suitor after suitor until his options had run completely dry. Could he possibly have any form of happiness with Hermione?
His smile faded slightly, but he drew the memories from earlier that evening back into his mind and strode with purpose back towards the dungeons.
It was her choice. Even if she had been cornered into proposing to him by circumstance and her own sense of justice and kindness, she had chosen to sleep with him before the law required them to do so.
Whether he would have truly been her first choice or not - he couldn't bring himself to believe it, despite her kind words - but he would do everything in his power to make her happy.
And if she was to continue as she had started, he could imagine this marriage being more of a blessing than the curse he had suspected it would be.
He would see her again the next evening, and it would be revealed then if she regretted her hasty actions.
CHAPTER SIXThree nights in a row they had their rendezvous, and each night had ended much like the first, with both of them feeling more confident and settled in their decision, their illicit partnerships a secret both of them took both pleasure and rebellious delight in.
Severus, for one, was happy to be doing things on his own terms despite the restrictions he was placed under. It was liberating, satisfying, and utterly delightful.
Hermione likewise was finding growing confidence in their arrangement, pleased that he appeared to want her as much as she wanted him, and always anticipating their next meeting as soon as their last ended. She loved the way he would accept her touches as she straightened his hair and collar and treated every inch of reachable skin with lingering kisses. She loved the way he basked in her affection. She'd never felt so wanted, so desired.
The second evening he had been seen walking towards her room, and they had found it necessary to announce the engagement. Although it would have been nice to have more time to meet in obscurity, they both agreed that it was inevitable as they would be wed at the end of the week, so they might as well address the questions with fact rather than allow them to come up with their own conspiracy theories.
Harry, although not exactly happy, had been more supportive than Hermione had expected, although part of her suspected it was out of guilt for what had occurred during the war. Ron, on the other hand, was still not talking to her as he couldn't accept why she had turned down his brother for the likes of Snape.
The boys were both under the impression that the clandestine meetings she was having were more about prenuptial negotiations of who would have what bookshelf space, and she went to no effort to correct them. She felt what they shared, despite the unsavoury law that was causing it, was something unique, something special. It just felt right. Inevitable, stable, the perfect result. A sure thing, and a good thing.
It was with a sense of shock then, that Hermione read the front page of the Daily Prophet that had landed in front of her three days before their scheduled wedding.
MARRIAGE LAW REVOKED!
Her face drained white and she felt ill. This should be a happy occurrence. She'd been saying since it's conception that it was a travesty of the worst kind...
Why then, did she feel like she had lost something important?
Her eyes flicked up to Severus' where the Headmistress was congratulating him heartily. He looked pale himself, and when his eyes met hers, his expression shuttered immediately into a blank slate.
Her stomach twisted, and she looked down to her plate of congealing eggs. He must regret what they had done. It was her idea to start early, she'd pushed it... And now there was no reason to get married at all. He must hate himself, and worse... He must hate her...
"That's great news 'Mione," Ron said cheerfully around his mouthful of sausage. "Now you don't have to marry that old slimeball at all. Hear hear!" Hermione trembled.
"You alright Hermione?" Ginny asked. She and Harry were looking at her with concern.
"Y-yeah," she said. "It's great news. About the law. It's just been an emotional rollercoaster, is all."
"You must be so relieved," Ginny said empathetically. "If you want you can go lie down, I'm sure the boys can tell your professor you're not feeling well. They'll understand, since you were the only one in school affected. What have you got first?"
It hit her like a bucket of ice. "Potions." She was going to have to be in his class for the rest of the year, knowing all the things she knew, wanting some ridiculous future that would no longer happen.
But how could she show her face today? She couldn't bear it. Not until they'd had time to talk about it together. She didn't want their first conversation to be in an open classroom in front of all the other seventh and eight years.
"I'll do that," she said. "If... If anyone asks for me, I'm going to get a calming potion from the hospital wing, then I'll have a lie down."
Ginny nodded, and Hermione left without another look at her now ex-fiancé.
The news hit him like a hippogryff to the solar plexus.
In the brief moment he met Hermione's eyes and saw her sickly expression he felt his heart break. Never had he ever thought he would come across someone like her, someone who made him feel so whole.
Those nights they had shared had been more than just sex to him, they'd been making love. It was something so pure and so precious he couldn't bring himself to regret their haste - they were among the best moments of his entire life.
And yet her expression had spoken volumes to him as to her feelings on the matter.
He needed to speak with her, desperately. Minerva seemed to think their arrangement was at an end, neatly tied off by the headline in the paper - but he had to hear it from her lips. Those sweet, beautiful lips.
She missed her potions lesson, for which he couldn't blame her. He wished he could cancel the lot of his classes and just go to her immediately. He doubted she would appreciate the attention, though.
Patiently, he waited until after dinner, noticing with mounting concern she had skipped every meal.
Finally, he left the Great Hall with a box of leftovers secreted magically away under his robes and made his way up to the entrance of her rooms. ... Hermione wasn't surprised when Severus turned up at her door. She opened the door wide and allowed him in, touched he had brought her some leftovers under a warming charm.
She had begun to get hungry, although her appetite again evaded her under threat of the needed conversation.
"So," he said finally, searching her face.
"So," Hermione returned.
"I'm not sure if I should apologize," he whispered softly. "I can't find I regret our actions, as such, unless of course you regretted them, in which case-"
"I don't," Hermione interrupted hurriedly. "I don't regret them. I was so scared you would."
He pulled her into a sudden hug, and she couldn't withhold a dreadful sob that was muffled as she turned her face into his chest.
"It feels so wrong to feel so disappointed," Hermione whispered again. "I've been criticizing this half-baked law since it was little more than a rumour, and every day there's been such dreadful stories."
"And yet part of me wished they'd waited another week," Severus agreed. "A selfish thought, but practical."
Hermione nodded; awestruck he felt the same.
"We need to talk about this. Us," he stroked a long finger down her cheek before pulling back to a more dignified distance and taking a seat in an armchair. She sat on the sofa opposite him, the same one they had shared less than twenty-four hours ago.
"While Minerva was supportive of our arrangement insofar as the law was concerned, she will not be now the engagement is over," he expanded. "It would be...Inappropriate due to my position and could bring disrepute on your studies."
"Your job as well," Hermione nodded. "They could fire you."
Severus nodded distastefully. "You have six more months of classes and then two more years in your apprenticeship within the castle."
"You're right," Hermione sighed. "It's a long time. I can't expect you to wait that long for me."
"Me?!" Severus repeated, aghast. "Hermione, you will find I can be very patient. It is you who I am more concerned for."
Hermione shook her head." What if... What if the engagement wasn't over?"
Severus stared at her. "What?"
"The ministry seems to think they can make all these decisions for us. Why do they think they can dissolve our engagement? We should be the ones to do that in our own time."
"You can't say... You can't still want to marry me," Severus shook his head. "I know we... fit well, but Hermione, marriage is a big commitment."
"I'm not saying any time soon," she blushed. "But... but we could continue... courting... And seeing each other if we had a long engagement, couldn't we? Purebloods seem to still get arranged marriages from infancy, surely we could have one as a backdrop so we could-"
"You want a farce of an engagement," Severus was not sure just how offended he should be. "Sowe can - can - carry on with this ... affair."
"Don't call it an affair," Hermione grumbled. "And I wouldn't think of it as a farce."
"Then what?" He pleaded.
"A long engagement," she said. "A loose engagement. A ... look, I don't have an interest in casual relationships. I want a connection, intimacy, chemistry. If we are engaged, I would treat that seriously, Severus. But if one or both of us was to change our minds I'd want it to be on our own terms, not because if some stupid decree."
In a moment he was at her side again, perched on the couch next to her, his mouth plundering hers.
"Minerva won't approve," he warned her between searing kisses.
"She will come around intime," Hermione encouraged him. "If we are open with her from the get-go and don't flaunt it..."
He kissed her again. "Just in case... She makes this difficult... Do you want to... Now?"
"God, yes," she gasped, and he hoisted her into his arms and carried her through to the bedroom.