Simon Petrikov used to be a normal human with a wife, life, and moderately interesting career, he used to be an antiquarian in fact, but the chaotic winds of fate deemed it so he become something else, or rather someone else.
After a fateful meeting in Scandinavia, the acquisition of an ancient ice crown, promptly followed by a spiral into the freezing abyss, the madness of the crowns magic deteriorated his mental state until he became unrecognizable from his previous self. Becoming a sociopathic ice wizard who kidnaps princesses to fulfill an innate loneliness and inner turmoil Simon had over losing Betty... he was now the Ice King.
"Gunter!" Ice King exclaimed from another room, but then walking into the one Gunter was in. "Have you seen my other favorite sock? How can I possibly impress the princesses without a full set of socks? I can't go out looking like this," Ice King complained to his penguin. A normal occurrence.
"Wenk wenk wenk." Gunter responded.
"What? You say I don't wear socks that often? You silly little penguin, of course I always wear- huh?!" Ice King lifted his robe, and gasped in surprised shocked to see his feet, they were bare.
He rubbed his chin in contemplation. "Well that's strange... I could've sworn I, eh, what was I doing again? Oh right! Its that time of the week, welp time to catch me a good ol princess." Utterly disregarding his own previous thoughts, Ice King stretched momentarily with an audible pop before taking off ascending into the air and out his castle window to fulfill his usual romantic quest.
"Doo de doo de doo de doo, what lucky princess shall our dear old Ice King capture today?" Various images of crowned ladies flashed through Ice King's mind, each inspiring him yet something felt off today.
"Lumpy Space Princess?" Ice King asked himself. She wouldn't really be his first choice, her voice grated on his nerves at times, and she always complained about something.
"Slime princess? Nah, last time she tracked all this goey muck all over my castle, it took ages for me and the penguins to clean up." Ice King muttered.
"Princess Bubblegum?!" Ordinarily the thought of his sweet bride-to-be would make his heart flutter with joy, but Finn and Jake always kicked his butt when he kidnapped her, or really any princess. Again and again, his plans for love were foiled.
But nowadays, or since yesterday, they were bros after a precious bonding experience, he wasn't quite sure if he wanted to jeopardize his new friendship considering he had few precious other friends. Or really any friends.
"Maybe I'm just not in the Princess mood today... but I am still incredibly lonely." Ice King pondered his predicament for a moment. "Guess I'll see if I can find myself a normal lady to date. I can do that, can't I? I'm cool enough right?"
He rubbed his chin in thorough contemplation. "What should I do to woo a lady though? Kidnap them? No that's usually reserved for Princesses... Love letters? Oooo I know! The door-in-the-face technique! I read it in a book once where if you make an intentionally large request that you expect to be rejected, you follow it by a smaller, more reasonable request and that'll be more reasonable and likely to be accepted. I am a genius!"
Ice King flew around a forested area. "Decent place as any to find a honey! And not just the bee type! A honey I can smooch!"
"Eenie meenie minie moe!" The ice wizards eyes quickly darted to a random girl shaped figure in his field of vision, honing in he even recognized her as a fellow Wizard he's seen around Wizard City too. Perfect!
"I'm so excited, I'm even gonna record this encounter and treasure this memory forever!" The Ice King pulled out a square mic looking device out from his beard, clicked a red a red button on it, before shoving back in.
Descending onto the ground, he approached his latest chosen target of affection...
SCENEBREAKSCENEBREAKSCENEBREAKSCENEBREAK
Huntress Wizard preferred to live a more solitary existence. It was the result of her own personality being more at ease with a forest dwelling lifestyle. She always had a deeper connection to nature then most people, and thus felt it was only right for her to simply live off the land honing her survival skills. It was simple, it felt natural, it was her calling and what she's known ever since she's embraced the life of wizzarding and wizardry in order to quell her own inner turmoil due to events not needing mentioning.
Calmly she focused on playing her flute, in sync with her surroundings. A bird even landed on her shoulder.
There was a sort of peace to it all.
She was at peace.
"Hey Huntress Wizard~!" Ice King enthusiastically announced his presence, startling Huntress Wizard and causing the bird to fly away.
She sighed. "Of course, that is just exactly who I wanted to see right now." She muttered to herself sarcastically. Ice King was a social pariah, and although they were both Wizards, Ice King was consistently annoying to each and every single person he encountered.
Not least because he had an obsession with kidnapping princess, his personality was notably aggravating and at most times nonsensical or so she's heard. She really didn't want to deal with his type, didn't he get the hint last time?
"Hey Huntress Wizard there was uh, something I wanted to ask you." Ice King approached fiddling with his thumbs, shyly looking off to the side.
"Ice King, what do you want?" Huntress Wizard narrowed her eyes. Better to get it over with as fast as possible.
Huntress Wizard regretted her words. Ice King fell on his knees in front of her grabbed her hands, what he said next she had absolutely not anticipated. "Wanna get married, settle down somewhere quiet and have lots and lots of kids together?"
"W-what the glob?! What!? No!" A scandalized expression immediately engraved itself on Huntress Wizard's face along with a deep green blush betraying her usual stoicism, she was naturally caught off his by this sudden and brazen proposal. She pulled away in disgust instantaneously and slapped his hand off.
Huntress Wizard opened her mouth to respond, but closed it. The idea of marrying the Ice King was in itself disturbing, having children with the guy was absurd and made her feel ill.
She felt her fight and flight instincts kick in, compelling her to either turn into a hawk and fly away or throw an arrow at his face. Though after a moment of reflection she felt escalation was probably, maybe unnecessary here, on his knees begging courtship he looked more pitiful then anything else.
"Th-then will you at least go on a date with me?" Ice King toned himself down to almost sane levels, but it was still very unreasonable of a request.
Huntress Wizard considered he might not quite understand her curt words considering last time they encountered she threatened him, so perhaps a different approach is needed thoroughly get him out of her hair.
Huntress Wizard crossed her arms. "Ice King. Give me one really good reason why I should go on a date with you. My sphere of interest lies within the wilderness and nature and not ice and snow, the only thing connecting us, if barely, is the magic of wizardry. Why should I choose to use my time bonding with someone of your... character?"
"Because... I would make a great boyfriend?" Ice King suggested.
Huntress Wizard looked at him incredulousy. Is that what he had to say?
She closed her eyes and thought of what to say for a full minute.
"After careful consideration, I will consider your request."
"Yippeee! A date a date!" Ice King prematurely celebrated, even beginning to do a dance.
"But ONLY after you successfully track and study the Phantom Stag of the Enchanted Forest for a full lunar cycle. Document its habits, and then we can talk." If Ice King was committed to this might as well give him an overwhelmingly difficult task to accomplish.
'As if the donk could even do it, even I, an experienced hunter of the forest have a nigh impossible time keeping track of such a majestic creature. The likelihood of an ice wizard doing it is slim to none.' Huntress Wizard felt satisfied at her logic; and it would redirect the Ice King for a substantial period of time away from her, and maybe his attention span was low enough that'd he even forget.
Ice King gasped, there were stars in his eyes. "Really?! Y-you mean you'll give me a chance!?"
Huntress Wizard was starting to regret not running away.
"Don't worry my grassy lady! I, Ice King shall become an ice deer tracker just for you." He flew off and away, all while laughing ecstatically.
Huntress Wizard shook her head, she felt like she made a mistake giving the Ice King an inch, but at least if he against all odds managed to fulfill that task, then his presence might be slightly tolerable, someone who could out-do her own skills deserved some modicum of respect. Even if that someone was the Ice King.