Chapter title inspired by "Soldier" by Fleurie and Tommee Profitt
Chapter Twenty-Seven: Soldier Keep on Marching On
"Remind me why I'm here."
Alice stood beside Suzie and wiped the sweat from her forehead. They were hiding behind a stack of crates, directly in the sun on the hottest day in August. Autumn couldn't come quick enough. Alice's skin crawled from her skirt clinging to her legs, and the heat radiated from under her thick hair. At least she didn't have to wear the olive green pants and cotton shirts all the soldiers had to wear. Despite being born and raised in Texas, Alice detested the heat and wanted nothing more than to sit in the shade of a tree and take a much-needed nap. Even the infirmary, overcrowded with sweaty men, sounded better than standing for an hour in the direct sunlight for no reason.
The things she did for her friends.
"I need you to distract my brother," Suzie replied, somehow unfazed by their brazen effort to spy on a member of Captain America's team.
"To sneak into a ranking officer's tent and read classified information instead of talking to your brother like a normal human being?" Alice questioned. Her friend had some of the wildest, and stupidest, plans she had ever heard.
Suzie frowned at her response. If the kid couldn't handle the truth of the absurdity of the plan, then Suzie had no one to plan but herself. Being blunt cut to the point quicker, and Alice hated when people danced around the truth as if not addressing the obvious would somehow change something or make it go away.
"Well, when you put it like that…"
"It's the truth, honey." A mosquito buzzed above her and she swatted it away. "This isn't a fairytale: some plans are just flat-out stupid. We don't even know if this is gonna work."
"Have a little faith, won't ya?" Suzie peered around the stack of crates.
"It's called being realistic," Alice corrected. "I'm not like you; I don't dream about fantasy and knights in shining armour."
Offended, Suzie's head swiveled around toward Alice and she balked.
"I've seen your book collection," Alice added to make her point clear. All the soldiers had at least something to read in downtime, but Suzie's selection matched her level of fantastical and unrealistic ideas. Not that Alice cared about the kid's choice of reading material. "The Hobbit? Really? It's a children's book."
Appalled by Alice's superior reading decisions, Suzie sputtered, "Blame my brother." Because shifting the blame to someone not present to defend himself made everything so much easier. "He's the one who had it shipped to our house before the book even reached standard US sales."
Alice raised an eyebrow and scoffed. Who would ever want to date him? "No offense, but he sounds like a dolt."
Unable to think of a snarky retort, Suzie turned away and checked the tent again. The mosquito returned with gusto and circled Alice's head. Annoyed, tired, and hot, Alice smacked it out of the air and flicked the dead bug onto the ground. There were better things to do instead of standing out here and waiting for Suzie to finally make up her mind. And the damn mosquitoes were not making anything better.
"You've been stalking your brother for the past two weeks," Alice pointed out. "If you really wanted to help, why don't you ask him?"
Suzie gave a weak laugh. "He's the silent brooding type. He's not gonna let me help 'cause he's 'preparing for some top secret mission.'"
"He's working with Captain America, you know. Whatever he's doing, he's got every right to keep quiet about it. Maybe you should let it go and focus on other things. Celebrate your brother being alive instead of spying on him."
"He's in pain."
So dramatic.
"How would you know if you haven't even talked to him?"
"I can see it in his eyes, Alice. Something happened to him, and if there's a chance I can help, Imma take it. He needs me, but he's too stubborn."
A pause filled the stifling air as Alice contemplated Suzie's words. A strand of hair came loose from her updo, and she tucked it back in before saying, "Guess it runs in the family."
Suzie's eyes narrowed. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Brushing a hand in the air to wave away the question, Alice ignored her friend and switched topics. "It means I've got actual talent, you know. I'm not gonna flirt with some guy because you asked me to. I have some sense of self-respect."
Unamused and annoyed, Suzie guided Alice away from the crates and gestured at the tent. A Jeep parked next to the large tent had several crates piled in the back. Scattered around the edge of the burlap walls were stacks of supplies. The thick covering obscured any view of the inside, but a small crack in the opening allowed Alice to see someone moving.
"Are you sure this will work?" Alice reiterated. Precious time cost lives and money in the army, and soldiers always needed attending to. If she wasted her day doing something stupid and illegal, such as being complicit in a potential military crime, she would not be happy, to say the least.
The way Suzie rolled her eyes made the question seem unnecessary and ridiculous. "Please, this is my brother we're talking about. He'd flirt with any woman wearing a skirt and lipstick."
"Do you really think so lowly of me?" Alice let Suzie spin her around to face the tent. "There's more to life than just a pretty face…"
All previous thoughts trailed off as a tall man stepped out of the tent and strode to the Jeep, marking something on a clipboard. Alice's eyes roved over the man, drinking in the delicious sight. The white, sleeveless shirt exposed his muscular arms and broad shoulders, and Alice couldn't help but stare as he lifted a box into the back of the Jeep with ease.
"Oh. Okaayyy." Alice bit her lip and nodded in the man's direction. "Him?" she asked without taking her eyes away.
"Yup."
"You didn't tell me your brother is an absolute dish. Sergeant, you said?" Maybe this flirting plan wasn't such a bad idea after all. "Alice Barnes has a nice ring to it. Mmmm, I'd love to take a ride on that." Sergeant Barnes squatted down to grab another crate, his back turned to the duo. "Just look at those legs. So strong and firm."
"Okay," Suzie muttered, uncomfortable and disgusted. She patted Alice on the shoulder and pushed her forward. "Go do your thing."
"You don't have to tell me twice."
Without a glance at her friend, Alice traced her lips with her finger to fix her lipstick and patted at her hair. Smoothing down her skirt, Alice sauntered over to the man and positioned herself on the opposite side of the Jeep. Too focused on his clipboard to notice her right away, Alice enjoyed her view of his sharp side profile. A light dusting of stubble covered his jaw, and his dog tags glittered as he moved, dangling between his sculpted pecs. A thin sheen of sweat highlighted his muscles, painting him almost shiny in the sun.
This was gonna be fun.
"Hello, Sarge," Alice drawled and gave her sweetest smile when he looked up at her.
He did a cute double-take before lowering his clipboard. Confusion crossed his face but he smiled, showing his pearly white teeth. "Do I know you?"
Alice practically stumbled from hearing his thick Brooklyn accent. Forget everything she had said about no one wanting to date this man; moving to Brooklyn sounded more and more like heaven.
Leaning forward, she undid the top two buttons on her blouse and propped her elbows on the side of the Jeep, curving her back so her chest extended forward. She smiled when his gorgeous blue eyes flickered down. "Do you want to?"
Sergeant Barnes glanced around, probably checking for other people before returning Alice's smile. He set his clipboard onto a crate and ran a hand through his handsome brown hair.
"To whom do I owe the pleasure?"
"Name's Alice." Gosh, she could stare at him for hours. "I saw you standing here all handsome-like and thought you would fit perfectly in my wonderland."
He laughed, and damn, it wasn't just the sun making her hot. "I hope it's not as crazy as the fairytale."
"It's much better." She slid around the Jeep to lean into him. He smiled again, and she could practically melt on the spot. Tiptoeing her fingers up his chest, she caught his dog tags and tangled them around her index finger with a slight pull. He towered over her, and she couldn't stop the shiver when she saw him staring down her shirt.
"Let's go somewhere private," Alice whispered into his ear. "We can go dive down the rabbit hole."
"You're pretty confident." He placed a hand on her waist to draw her closer. "I like it."
"I'll let you see that confidence up close and personal, sugar."
Spurred by anticipation, Alice took his hand and led him away, almost dizzy for what wonders lay ahead through the looking glass.
Once Alice left with Bucky, Suzie seized her opportunity and snuck into the tent. The unremarkable cots pushed up against the walls on opposite sides of each other. A lantern hung from the middle of the ceiling and a few crates served as tables, or chairs if one did not care about getting splinters in his rear end.
The footlocker containing Bucky's clothes and other equipment had a map and the fanciest-looking rifle Suzie had ever seen sitting on top. An expensive handgun, along with a magazine of bullets, leaned lovingly against the rifle. Other items and clothes on Bucky's side were flung about at random, a signature of his unceasing messiness. The only folded clothes were his non-standard-issue blue jacket and a pair of brown pants tucked inside a separate chest—a uniform of sorts.
Would it kill Bucky to clean up once in a while? The mess made Suzie's eye twitch, and once again, she had to shove down the urge to organize the tent into something more bearable. Moving anything would only cause suspicion, and Bucky had yelled at Suzie more than once to stay out of his bedroom at home and leave his mess alone. He claimed he knew where he put everything, but the disorganization really aggravated Suzie and she wanted to shake her older brother until he finally got it through his thick skull that maybe it would be nice to actually see everything all neat and tidy.
It would certainly prevent wrinkles in his clothes, because of which, Ma had long ago given up on ironing everything because Bucky would only crease his shirts again. The army's strict policy about cleanliness must not apply to Bucky because he's working with Captain America.
How her brother had managed to befriend Captain America—the idiotic clown—Suzie had no idea. She didn't particularly care.
The other cot displayed a better example of army tidiness, thank the heavens. A stack of notebooks rested on the cot's wooden footlocker. It pressed between the tent and the top of the bed like a cross between a makeshift headboard and nightstand. Not one to snoop through a stranger's belongings, Suzie left the other man's footlocker alone.
Yet, she did find, out of all things, a round shield painted with the least conspicuous paint job ever. Aside from the ridiculous red, white, and blue colors, the shield surprisingly moved easily as Suzie flipped it over to slide her arm through the leather straps. As absurd as it sounded, pride swelled in her chest, almost as if the shield, once held, could turn even the least patriotic citizens into full-blown cheerleaders of the glorious U.S. of A.
Glory and honor aside, the stupid paint job needed work—no better way to get killed than to carry a giant target on one's back. Whoever thought of such a design must have a few screws loose.
Careful not to leave a mess, she set the shield down and made sure to replace every file she read in its original spot. Most of the boring, military information did not offer any details as to why Bucky acted agitated and defensive whenever Suzie asked him about the war and what caused his disappearance. The frustration kept ramping up as Suzie failed to find anything useful.
Why couldn't Bucky just tell her?
About thirty minutes after Bucky left with Alice, time ran out and cut the search short when the man in question pushed open the flap and strode into the tent.
At first, they didn't notice each other.
Suzie clutched a file containing an image of a flag—an octopus, as if it tried to one-up the weirdness of the shield, and did not hear her brother come in. Then she turned around and ran right into him.
"What the—" Bucky muttered, his hand on his tangled hair. Alice must have had a lot of fun because Bucky's shirt curled untucked over his belt, his untied bootlaces brushed the ground, and residue of cherry-red lipstick stained his neck and the corners of his lips.
Quick as a flash, Suzie hid the strange octopus flag file behind her back and stood up straight to feign innocence. It wouldn't work, of course, but considering Bucky's current state, it couldn't hurt to try.
"I can explain," Suzie said. In a feeble attempt to distract Bucky from asking any questions, Suzie batted her eyelashes and mustered a cute, innocent smile.
Bucky's dreamy expression soured and he rolled his eyes. "That used to work when you had longer hair." He placed his palm against Suzie's face and pushed her aside. Rummaging through his footlocker, he pulled out a handkerchief and rubbed at the lipstick stains. "Whadda doing here?"
Bitter from having Bucky's sweaty hand—who knows where it had been—shoved against her sore nose, Suzie glared at her brother and turned to keep herself between him and the file clutched behind her back. "Just lookin'."
Dropping his handkerchief onto his cot, Bucky sighed in exasperation. Tread carefully, it warned. "Even out here, you can't stay away from my stuff. It's private, not to mention, government-related."
"Then why don't you keep it organized?"
The lantern almost smacked him in the head as he turned. "Oh for crying out loud, you're not Ma; you can't tell me to clean my room. Go away." To emphasize his point, he picked up the dirty handkerchief and chucked it at Suzie. Suzie dodged the ball of fabric, but the sudden motion caused a few papers to slide out of the file and onto the ground.
"What's that?" Bucky asked, stepping over. His head clanged against the lantern with a sickening enough sound to make Suzie flinch in sympathy. Letting loose a string of curses that would make all the old ladies at church blush Bucky ripped the metal lantern from its hook and tossed it onto his cot where it rolled off and shattered onto the ground.
Visibly irritated, Bucky marched over, pushed Suzie aside, and gathered up the stray papers. He paused to scan over the information in the file before shaking the paper in Suzie's face and yanking the rest of the file from her hands.
"Why the hell do you have this?!" Bucky shouted. He shoved the crumbled paper into the file and slapped it down on one of the crates. "I should write you up for trespassing. What is wrong with you?"
Unfazed by his outburst, Suzie met Bucky's intensity and pushed him away. "What's wrong with me?! What's wrong with you?! You disappeared for months, suddenly showed up here, and you haven't told me anything about what happened. I'm worried about you, and I can't help if you don't tell me what's wrong."
"Nothing's wrong," Bucky lied. "I'm fine." The way his eyes flickered immediately toward the strange octopus flag with apprehension told otherwise. To invalidate his point even further, he took a few steps away from the crate.
"No, you're not."
"Why's it matter to you?"
"I'm your sister, Bucky! Of course, I'm worried about you! You're the whole reason why I'm here. And I'm not gonna let all my efforts go to waste because you're too stubborn to ask for help. Please, just tell me. What are you hiding?"
"You wouldn't understand." Bucky's voice dropped dangerously low, the rumble of a volcano before it erupted.
"Why not?" Suzie spread her arms, welcoming any explanation Bucky could provide.
"You shouldn't even be here. Go home."
"I'm not gonna drop everything and leave."
"I can get you an honorable discharge. I hope Ma grounds you for life." Deciding to end the conversation, Bucky stepped toward the exit, but Suzie blocked his path. Bucky muttered something unintelligible to the burlap ceiling before ordering, "Move."
"No." Suzie stood her ground and met Bucky's glare. "What's with the octopus flag? They're not Nazis."
"They're worse."
The way Bucky replied made a shiver ripple down her spine. Still, she refused to move when Bucky attempted to squeeze past.
"Who are they?"
"None of your concern, back off."
"I want to know."
"No, you don't."
A tremor shook through Bucky as he glared at his sister, and it suddenly dawned on her. "They're the ones who hurt you, weren't they? They're why you were missing for months."
Bucky froze in the first open display of terror Suzie had ever seen in her brother. Oh shit. Oh damn.
"Trust me, Suzie, you don't want to mess with them," Bucky whispered, as if evoking their name would cause them to appear. "They're complete snakes, working from the shadows, reigning death faster than the frickin' Nazis. We'll never see them coming unless we strike first. And we've been striking first, it's my whole damn job, to stop those bastards from winning the war and killing us all. I tell you this, as both a commanding officer and your older brother: go home. This is not a place for men, much less a lady."
"I want to help," Suzie breathed, wide-eyed. The chill of Hydra's icy grasp descended from the shadows and dragged its frozen fingers down Suzie's spine. Even so, she refused to leave, not when she finally discovered who killed her brother and mom. They were going to pay, and not even Bucky could stop her.
"No. It's too dangerous."
"The whole war is dangerous, and yet I'm still here. I can handle it."
"No, you can't. You can't possibly imagine what it's like." He started to guide Suzie toward the exit. "Go! Home!"
"To what?" Suzie shoved Bucky away and threw up her hands. "There's nobody to go home to!"
Taken aback, Bucky's mouth worked but no words came out aside from a weak, "What?"
When Suzie did not answer, Bucky grabbed his sister by the shoulders and stared at her as if he could read her mind through her stinging eyes. Panic swelled, Suzie could see it in the way his chest heaved and his eyes darted over Suzie's face, searching for an answer.
"Suzie…what happened?" No response, so he shook her while shouting, "Dammit, Suzie, what happened?!"
Startled out of her stupor, Suzie choked out: "A-A group…sh-shot up the church. Travis…got hit. Ma died later, heart attack or stroke, I don't know." She looked up to meet her brother's eyes, her voice shaking in tandem with her trembling body. "They're dead, gone. And I couldn't save them."
"And Becca?" Bucky whispered, afraid of the answer.
"She's okay. With Henry and Ida. She…she's safe. But I don't know where Steve's at. And I had to bury them." A sob wracked her body and she covered her mouth to compose herself. "I couldn't stand the empty house and all the memories, so I left to find you."
Bucky's voice rumbled in quiet enragement. "Who did this?"
"I-I don't know. But there one guy cornered Becca and me in the alleyway. He killed himself once the police showed up. A pill or something."
Recognition flickered across Bucky's face, and he reeled as his chest heaved. "What did he do? Did he say anything unique?"
"'Hail Hydra?'"
Bucky swore, threw up his hands, and turned his back toward his sister. His shoulders shook as a continuous slew of curses rolled from his lips.
"Tell me you're lying," he said to the tent wall.
"I wish I was."
An agonizing pause filled the stiff air as Bucky silently processed the horrific information. He wiped his eyes before he finally faced his sister. Once he did, his older brother persona offered no cracks, and nothing but anger and the slightest hint of grief showed on his face. He always shoved down his emotions into a blank mask to focus more on his siblings' comfort. As much as she appreciated Bucky's unceasing support, she knew it must take a toll on him to suffer through things alone, and she wished he let it shine through once in a while.
"Why didn't you tell me earlier?" No more wavering in his voice, he stood rock solid, only here to console and protect his sister.
"You were kind of missing for a few months."
Bucky sucked in a deep breath and tilted his head to stare at the ceiling. No doubt he still refused to cry in front of his sister.
In her entire life, Suzie had seen Bucky cry once, and she remembered it clear as day. It happened when his girlfriend of two years, a lovely redhead nicknamed Dot, broke up with him out of nowhere during his freshman year of high school. Nobody knew the reason why; they had been a cute couple. He had come home crying one day, locked himself in his room for the weekend, and refused to talk about it.
A prevailing theory in the Barnes household blamed Dot for why Bucky stopped pursuing long-term relationships and only focused on flirting with a new woman each week. High school relationships never lasted long, let alone ones that started in middle school, so the theory seemed rather ignorant. Still, Suzie could never forget the tears streaming down her brother's face as he ran up the stairs to his room.
Of course, he had not asked for any help then, and he would never ask for it now, even when he clearly needed it the most. Nobody should ever grieve on their own, not when they don't have to.
"Please, Bucky, I want to help," Suzie pleaded. "I can't leave those monsters out there, not after what they did."
"Don't," Bucky said, his hands on his hips in a posture reminiscent of Ma. Unlike Ma, he stared at the ground in defeat. "Just…don't."
"I've proven myself," Suzie pressed. "I've got useful skills. Why—"
Whipping around, Bucky gripped Suzie by the biceps hard enough to bruise and shook her. "'Cause I can't lose you, too!" He stopped shaking her and Suzie watched in surprise as a single tear rolled down his cheek. He wiped it away and bent at the knees to better match her height. "Dammit, Suzie, why can't you listen? This isn't some back-alley school fight, it's war! You're my little sister, I'm supposed to protect you. Like it or not, I'd rather break my back or lose a limb than let you step one foot on a battlefield, especially not against Hydra."
Anger gone as quick as it appeared, Bucky let her go, stumbled away, and sniffed. Gesturing with his hand while standing half-turned toward her, Bucky said, "I'm confining you to the camp where you'll be safe."
Shocked, Suzie let out an indignant cry. "You can't do that!"
"The hell I can, I'm a sergeant. And I've got Captain America on my side." He held up a hand before Suzie could protest. "If you want to play dress up and act like a soldier, Imma treat you like one."
In a last-ditch effort to make him understand, Suzie resorted to a low blow. "You're only doing this 'cause I'm a girl, and girls aren't allowed to be soldiers."
It got Bucky's reaction and he pointed an accusing finger at her. "You're the one who brought it up, not me." He shushed her again. "And don't you say stupid things like that 'cause you know it's not true. I'd do the exact same thing to Travis."
"I don't need protecting." She knew she sounded childish, but at this point, she did not care. "This isn't fair. I know my rights."
"Don't make me turn it into an order, soldier," Bucky spat.
The urge to hit something surged in her chest, and Suzie had to dig her fingernails into her palms to stop herself from lashing out. Out of all the people to treat her like a pathetic child, Suzie had never imagined her own brother to do so.
Eye twitching and not-so-subtly seething, Suzie growled through gritted teeth, "Imma go talk to my lawyer."
"Go ahead!" Bucky called after her.
Yanking open the flap of the tent, Suzie flipped Bucky the bird and stormed off.
/\/\/\
Once the flap fluttered closed and Bucky could no longer hear Suzie muttering obscenities, Bucky let out a wavering breath. His eyes stung, and he blinked at the ceiling a few times before stumbling over to his cot and collapsing.
Lips trembling and chest aching from the effort of keeping himself together, Bucky dropped his head into his hands and cried.
More drama will ensue. :)