Disclaimer for the whole fanfiction: The characters I use in this fanfiction are not mine and the rights on them belong to Suzanne Collins, I'm just borrowing them, also none of this headcannons is confirmed, I'm just making it up.

TW: Trigger warning: This fanfiction contains contend, that might be triggering for some people, such as detailed description of death, depression, anxiety, self harm, self-destructive behavior, smut and abuse, thats why it's rated p18, if you feel uncomfortable with some of these topics, then please don't read this story, because it could trigger you. And please remember that you are loved and you can always reach out for help.

A/N: Heyy, thanks for deciding to read this fanfic, just before you start reading, please keep in mind that I'm not a native speaker, so english is not my first language, so even though I really try my best, there can and will be some mistakes. If you notice them, you can tell me in the comment section, I'd really appreciate that (ofcourse I'd also be happy about any other comments). That's it, have fun and enjoy reading. :DD

Chapter one, "Just a dream"

"No! No please" The red-haired girl screamed,as the way older blonde one slowly walked closer. She had no chance and she knew that, in the moment she felt the tree on her back, leaving no space for her her to run away from the careers and she knew that she was about to die, in the moment she panically tried to escape and trapped over some roots.

The moment the careers circumstanced her, still laughing, the moment she felt strong hands grabbing her throat roughly, turning her around. Her face was pale with dark rings under her eyes from days of not sleeping, but that wasnt the scary part about her. What scared me the most were her eyes, her hazelnut-brown eyes, starring directly into mine, they looked empty, like she has already accepted the fact that she was going to die.

I felt my breath getting faster and faster, I knew what was going to happen, I knew the scene, I knew how she would die, I knew her scream, that sent chills through my whole body, a scream that makes you wanna vomit, I knew it too well and it still shocked me, I still flinched in panic as the boy lifted his sword, I tried to run, as fast as I could, but I couldn't move, I couldn't escape, I had to stand there in panic and watch the brutal scene once again as my muscles wouldn't move. Her scream felt like a thousand glass splitters pressing into my bones and I started screaming as it was the only thing I could do.

I woke up from my own scream and couldn't breathe, it felt like an insane amount of weight was pressing against my lungs and stopped me from getting air into them. These pictures were still spinning in my head and I could feel my little heart pounding faster than ever before.

I looked at my hands, I must have gripped my nails so hard into my palms that they left red marks on them. I sat up and tried to control my breath, tears still running down my cheeks, waiting for it to get better.

I knew this dream, I've been having it since last sunday, when my parents let me watch the Hunger games for the first time, "to make me tough", they said. I mean they're probably right. I have to get cold and tough if I wanna win the Hunger games one day. And that's my dream, I mean since I was born it's been the plan, so it has to be my dream. My parents are both victors so they have a reputation in the capitol, so obviously their daughter has to also win, thats how it works here in district two. That's my life and I gotta make the best out of it, right? And I could have it way worse.

My breath started to get normal again and I sat on the windowsill. I wouldn't go back to sleep again, in fact I couldn't sleep anyways, so I sat there in silence watching the sun rise and district two wake up. It was still dark outside as I heard the loud alert wich you could hear in the whole district. It was the signal for the mine workers to start their shift.

I watched the hundreds of workers getting out and getting on the train to the mines, all of them carrying their helmets and the fear of not coming back. This view would be heartbreaking for a lot of people but I've just gotten used to it. I mean I do feel sorry for them but that's their life, we can't choose wich family we get born into and mine isn't perfect either.

The sun started rising and I watched the rest of district two slowly awake. The streets got fuller. I decided to go outside aswell, as I realized its already 6 in the morning. My parents are morning persons and I really didn't wanna get yelled at for getting up late.

I closed my window and climbed up my chair to reach up my closet and I pulled out a simple t-shirt and some leggins. As I took of my pyjamas and looked at myself in the mirror, I realized that the little accident I had yesterday, when I fell while climbing up a tree, has turned into a big bruise, directly on my ribs. I promised myself to be more careful, I wouldn't want my parents to think that I'm not even good enough to climb up a tree without falling down and getting a bruise, so I'd have to be careful and hide it.

I quickly finished getting dressed and brushed my dark brown hair into a ponytail, when I heard my moms footsteps on the stais. I quickly checked if my eyes were swollen from crying and was relieved as I saw that they weren't. She would probably get really mad if she found out I cried.

Only a second after I've heard her footsteps, I heard her knocking harsh against my door followed by a sharp "Clove? Are you awake?" My door swung open and my mom stood infront of me. She would probably be considered as beautiful if there wasn't this scaring look on her face. She had the same pale skin as me and the same black hair exept that she wore hers in a pretty braid while mine was in a simple ponytail. She wasn't tall but she still looked so strong and powerful, she was one of these persons that make you automatically feel bad about yourself with her cold, black eyes constantly judging you and watching every step you take like a bird, only waiting for you to make a mistake so she could point it out to you.

"Yes, I was just about to come down.", I quickly respondet. "Well, then you better hurry up, you don't wanna be lazy, right?", she said with a voice stinging like needles, before she gave me a warning look and left the room.

I hurried up and followed her into the kitchen. "Good morning", I greeted my dad who sat at the kitchen table, he gave me a short look, his ice-blue eyes scanning my whole apperiance for a second, before he went back to writing his letter, not even caring enough to respond to me.

I grabbed a glass of water as my mom turned around to me. "You'll finish that quickly and then you're gonna come with me for a little run, you have to improve your stamina if you wanna be good one day."

I nodded and finished my water before I put on my shoes and stepped out of the house next to her. The air was still cold and the sun still hasn't rised compleatly, as we started running around the victors village. My mom was running quickly and I struggled keeping her pace, since my legs were way smaller than hers, but I tried my best to not disappoint her and it seemed like I didn't as I got a simple "Not bad." from her at the end of our thirty-minute run.

I stepped back into the house and went to my room to change into a different shirt, before I headed to the kitchen to get some breakfast. I went to the fridge and got out some yoghurt wich i poured into a bowl with some banana that i sliced inton little pieces. I sat down on the table next to my dad, who was still working on his letter and he looked at me and said with a harsh voice, almost yelling: "Dont you see that I'm writing an imortant letter?! So tell me why, for gods sake, are you sitting next to me? Youre gonna spill your yoghurt all over my letter and I'll have to restart it. Dont you have a brain child?"

I quickly got up, apologized and went to the other side of the table. "Well done, wasn't your plan to not get him mad?" The little sarcastic voice in my head asked me. I told her to shut up but she was right. I did intend to not make him mad today, because I already had a big big bruise on my chest and he could get pretty rough on me when he was mad.

So I finished my breakfast in silence, with my moms eyes starring at me constantly and judging every single bite i took. She didn't say a word, because I had exactly what she wanted me to have, but I'm sure she would have if I changed the slightest bit of it.

I mean, I get her point, I got to watch what I eat if I wanna win the games, but the games are in like ten years, so I think shes being overdramatic. I mean, it wouldn't be the end of the world if I ate a little bit more for one day and I probably wouldn't put on weight anyways, because I'm pretty skinny naturally, but she thinks its a good preparation for the games, because I wont have much food there so I gotta learn how to handle hunger.

I placed my dishes in the sink and left the room. "I'll go outside", I told my mom. "Yeah, whatever, just watch what youre doing, we have a reputation.", she told me without even looking at me. I wasn't sad about the fact she doesn't care about me. Not anymore. The only thing she cared about was her reputation, she wouldnt care if I'd get hurt and I knew that, I mean she didn't even act like she cared so it was quite obvious.

I put on my boots and left the house. I walked around the victors village for some time until I got to the other end of it, where the woods started. The woods were my favourite place. Nearly no one was here and I could play as long as I wanted, without anybody judging me.

After walking around for some time I found a good tree to climb up. It was an old oak, I've learned that from the book my mom brought home for me from her last visit in the capitol.

I quickly checked if anyone was watching, then I climbed up the tree. My shoulders were still aching from the push-uos dad forced me to do yesterday but I still managed to get up there pretty fast and since I was really small and skinny I could get up pretty high.

I sat on a branch about six meters above the ground and watched some birds, before I got bored and got to the ground again, where I made up a game: I would run as fast as I could around and climb up on a tree, imagining I was in the games and had to run away from some other tributes.

After about half an hour of running and climbing I sat on a branch to rest for a bit, as I heard someone clapping. I quickly turned around to see a tall, tanned woman with black curls and brown eyes. I knew her, she looked quite familar.

"Not bad, little one.", she said and looked at me with a staggerd look on her face. I blushed a bit, how long has this woman been watching me? I quickly climbed back to the ground, jumping down the last two meters, wich hasn't been a smart move since my ankle kinda twisted, but I acted like nothing happend and walked towards her.

As I stepped closer and saw her teeth wich were shaped like fangs, the realization hit me. This was no one less than Enorbaria. The Enorbaria, last games victor. The girl who won at only 16, the girl who made district twos name once again. The girl who brutally ripped out a boys throat with her teeth, to save her life and win the games. And this Enorbaria was talking to me. And telling me, that I was good? I couldn't believe that this was happening.

"You're- you're Enobaria, right?" I asked her and I hated myself for the fact that my voice was shaking, like I was weak. The young woman just laughed. "Yes I am, you gotta be the little one from the Kentwells, aren't you?", she asked. I nodded. "Yes, I'm Clove. Clove Kentwell.

She smiled. "Nice to meet you Clove. I've watched you. Youre good. You have potential. Let me tell you, you'll make it one day. You'll be great." I couldn't believe it. Was she really telling me that I'll be great one day?

I tried to not show my joy over her words to much and kept a straight face. "Thank you, thats my plan." She nodded. "I like you, thats the right attitude. I have to go now, but I'm sure we'll meet again, Clove"

Then she walked away and left me alone with my disbelief on what has just happened. I continued playing in the woods until it started to get darker and I headed home.

I knew something was off, the moment I stepped inside. My mom immeadiatly turned around to me and I could see her eyes sparkle in anger. They were fighting, I knew that and I also knew it was about me, since they stopped the moment I walked inside.

I looked at my dad, he was standing behind the kitchen counter, looking like he was going to murder someone. He always looked like this when he was mad but I've never seen him that angry.

"Oh, here she is, why don't we just ask her what she thinks about it, huh?!", he pretty much yelled at my mom, who turned back to him immediatly, looking like she really has to control herself to not get physical. "Caelestis, we said we'll wait until she's five.", she yelled back at him, her eyes full of anger. "They take kids age six and older, she just turned four."

He just laughed. "Oh, dont be pathetic Astoria, both of us are victors, her name is on their list since the moment she was born, she will win one day, they want her, we could get her in at four, thats not the problem, the application letter is finished, the only problem is you. You want to take this opportunity from her. If she'd get in now, the other kids wont have the slightest bit of a chance, she will win, and that's what you want. So why do you wanna take this from her? She'll be thankful for it later, she'll just get soft and lazy if she doesn't go now.", he got louder and louder towards the end and was screaming right now.

My mom just turned around and looked at me and for the first time in my life she looked at me like she cared for me, like there was a little bit of humanity left in her, and she was worried about her daughter.

This lasted for two seconds. Then her eyes got cold again and she simply said: "Go talk to your father, its about time.", before she left the room.

I turned around and looked at my dad, waiting for him to say something. In a cold tone he just said: "Your mother and I made the decision that you'll go to the academy tomorrow. The new school year starts next monday, since the games ended on last sunday, and you'll start your first year of training.

A wave of shock hit me. This couldn't be real. I mean I knew I would go to the academy one day, but not that early. I tried to keep a cold facial expression, because he'd get really mad if I cried and said. "Isn't the minimum age six? I mean most kids get in there at seven, I just turned four in may.

He looked angry again and I was scared that he'd hit me as he raised his hand. But he just said. "I say you're going, so you are going, understood." I nodded. "Use your word to answer me, thats disrespectful.", he yelled and grabbed my shoulders roughly.

"I'm sorry", I quickly said. "I understood it, I'll go there." He let go of me as he said. "Good, now go help your mother pack your stuff."

I quickly left the room before he would get mad again and headed to my room, where my mom already packed some stuff into a suitcase. "You won't need much, you'll get clothes there.", she said. So we only packed my favourite hoodie, a pair of pretty jeans and some T-shirts.

At the end she also placed a picture of her and my dad on top and quickly closed the suitcase before I could take a closer look at it.

"You should go to sleep now, the train to the academy is leaving at 5 in the morning from the station in the victors village since its at the other end of the district.", she said and set my alarm on 4 a.m., before she left the room.

I sat down on my bed. How was I supposed to sleep now? A thousand thoughts were spinning through my head. I was kinda excited. I mean, Im going to the academy. That's always been my dream and it couldn't be worse than at home, so I was happy about it.

But its still a big step, I'll be there until I'm old enough to volunteer for the games. Then I'll win and move to my own house in the victors village. It's scary to think about that. I probably will never come back into this house.

I climbed onto the windowsill and opened the window. I could see the tree infront of the house. Directly infront of my window was a branch and I used to climb up the tree, sit high over the ground and watch the neighborhood, when I needed to escape from reality and my yelling parents for some time.

I thought about going there one last time, because I probably wont be able to ever go there again. But I decided that its too risky since it's dark outside, so I just said goodbye to the tree and all the memories, before I closed the window, changed into my pyjamas and laid on my bed, trying to fall asleep.